Everyday Systems

Kathleen

Moxie28, That's great! It looks like that idea is clicking with some of us who don't deal well with one failure. Some people can handle it, and more power to them. I'm just someone whose entire commitment to a diet is jeopardized by one failure. Kathleen PS. I started mid-month with this idea but st...

Kathleen

CrazyCatLady, It may sound bad, but really my weight is destroying my life. I feel sluggish. I can't fit into the sleeping bag I used when I was single. My husband is trying to be humorous. He knows I particularly enjoy dry wit. He put up with The Peanut Cluster Diet, which was "unconditional permis...

Kathleen

KAxelrod, Here's a post I have on my daily Check In thread: I put my kids on the No Sweets portion of the diet. My 9 year old and 7 year old were being taken home from school, and they had a conversation with me that reveals human nature only too well: Katie (9 year old): It's a Super Hot day, so it...

Kathleen

howfunisthat, It's actually encouraging to me that he is back-pedaling. He's starting to figure out that this diet might actually work! When we met, I weighed 132. Can you imagine? I weigh 80 pounds more than when we met. It will be many, many pounds before it is even noticeable that I have lost wei...

Kathleen

Ask blueskighs!

Kathleen

tlingit, Reinhard has some suggestions one of his podcasts -- I believe, S Days gone wild. He says you could have S events on weekends instead of S Days. He brought up other ideas as well, but I don't remember them. Try listening to that podcast. This month, I am working on having platefuls at meals...

Kathleen

winnie96, The beauty of this diet is that it brings orderliness to eating. Reinhard had in his book that weight problems are less of a problem in societies with "traditional structures" around eating. I thought that was a very insightful comment. I appreciate that I am getting more orderly in other ...

Kathleen

Merry, To me, the saddest aspect of the culture of obesity is not the people who are obese. It is the people who are thin and feel like they are starving. I had a boss like that once. She couldn't go anywhere without her little bag of food. This diet is a slow way out of obesity into a lower weight ...

Kathleen

winnie96, That's great! I know all about a diet ending with what my husband has called a "feeding frenzy." I kept a journal for a year just on weight loss, and it helped me to realize that -- at least for me -- it is imperative to avoid failures. Building a balance of Special Days to be used wheneve...

Kathleen

Merry, Some people do seem to worry, based on their blogs, but people are different. As for me, I think my problem would have been creating S Days, like taking my kids to TCBY to celebrate my son making Star Scout rank. Now I have a limit on the number of S Days I can create! I'm glad Reinhard encou...

Kathleen

resting52, That' s great that you are going to try the accumulation of two Special Days per month! It certainly seems like an easier approach to me because there is no need to debate about whether or not some event qualifies the day as a Special Day . I love the entire rest of the diet. I spent a ye...

Kathleen

I definitely considered the two snacks and one seconds on one plate at dinnertime to be legal and labeled the day a SUCCESS! It was just the perception of my little sweetie that showed I had really increased my eating at mealtime to help in compensating for eliminating between-meal snacks.
Kathleen

Kathleen

To me, the idea behind one plateful is that you see how much you are eating. I'm only on Day 33, so I'm new to this, but my second grader was very skeptical that I was following the rules of no seconds, no snacks, and no sweets. She pointed to my one plateful of dinner and said there are two snacks ...

Kathleen

resting52, What I mean is that I can plan the Special Day or can use the Special Days for what would have been an N Day failure. I started this accumulation of Special Days on September 15th, the week after I started The No S Diet -- which started with four failures on N Days. Starting on September ...

Kathleen

Here's part of why I love The No S Diet -- I don't have to be evaluating whether I have emotional or physical hunger! Is It Physical Hunger or Emotional Hunger? By Woman's Day Before you eat that... Physical hunger Builds gradually Strikes below the neck (e.g., growling stomach) Isn't accompanied by...

Kathleen

My husband calls it a "feeding frenzy." When I saw a movie on sharks at the zoo, I thought he had described it accurately! Congratulations on avoiding a feeding frenzy on an N Day!
Kathleen

Kathleen

Blueskighs- Yes, my fourteen year old is quite the WIT!!! I've always heard that it is tough to deal with teenagers, but I'm finding it quite a joy -- as they explore what they want and develop their own personal styles. I sure don't want to be wasting my time on dieting! My lowest recorded weight a...

Kathleen

Reinhard, No problem to mention my mod! If you could add in the name I gave it, that would be great. It's a NO HASSLE DIET! I look back on more than 30 years of dieting and see a lot of time spent -- on what? -- chewing each bite 10 times, making sure I am sitting down, keeping a food journal, count...

Kathleen

Janie -- Nothing is more motivating than to have a daughter who is overweight. I appreciate the negative impact on my life of years of restrictive eating that I could not keep up followed by a 60 pound weight gain in six years. I don't want my daughter to go through that. I don't want her to start d...

Kathleen

Melissa, Thanks. I'm really happy about working. Last year, I couldn't work during the school year. In August, 2007, I was diagnosed and treated for a rare form of cancer that doesn't metastize so it won't kill you, but I went through five surgeries and had a bandage on my head from August through F...

Kathleen

I do think that the S Days allow me to actually enjoy food without guilt. Right now, my 7 year old is stirring caramels over heat. I love apples, and I love caramels, but have I ever taken the time to make homemade caramel apples? No. There is an underlying current of I-don't-deserve-it that comes f...

Kathleen

Melissa, I'm glad to hear from you and to hear you are doing well. I've been approaching this as an intellectual exercise, trying to figure out what separates those who succeed from those who eventually quit. Things have gotten really easy for me, and it's a good thing! I got a job offer yesterday a...

Kathleen

Reinhard says to focus on behavior, not results. I initially resolved not to weigh myself until Christmas, but then I saw a blog in which a woman waited about three months until she weighed herself on Christmas, she then had several failure days, and she stopped blogging. On my Intuitive Eating diet...

Kathleen

Blueskighs, I'm still trying to figure out this diet, but I think that "unconditional permission to eat" on the weekends may be the key. Your body needs to know that you can be completely satisfied on the weekends. The mantra of "portion control" means you must deny yourself all you want at every mo...

Kathleen

howfunisthat, I feel surprisingly calm about this. Tonight, my husband bought pie for dinner. I said I can eat it in 5 1/2 hours but not now. It does seem silly -- and yet, I wore pants to a job interview today that didn't fit when I bought them two weeks ago. All I can speculate is that delaying ov...

Kathleen

What happened was I ate a lot while visiting my brother in law's family. Then I had to sleep for two hours, and then I had to use the bathroom several times. I did not get physically sick. That was two weekends ago. I did not have a repeat performance last week because the S Day from the prior week ...

Kathleen

Do you give yourself "conditional permission to eat" on S Days? The term is from the book Intuitive Eating . The theory is that people are overweight because they diet and then experience "diet backlash", the binge that ends many diets. The theory is that, if given unconditional permission to eat, y...

Kathleen

OK, I am convinced that one failure does not doom the diet. I still have more questions on this diet. The Strictness podcast did help me to conclude that one failure is not a disaster. Here is a summary of the podcast: How strict should you be? If you are strict, your appetites learn fast that it is...

Kathleen

The analogy to fidelity in marriage is meant to be provocative and over-the-top. What I see, though, in blogs that are left behind is that there often is one failure and then several failures and then silence. I know AA preaches that you are one drink away from being a drunk again. That sort of phil...

Kathleen

LA Loser, The reason why I bring up this issue, in addition to the fact that I have been struggling with this for years, comes from my review of blogs. Look at mel1972c's blog. She dumped out food, replaced it, and then had several cookies. She made a comment on my blog but hasn't been back to updat...

Kathleen

I am approaching this diet with the view that one failure is a disaster. I changed the definition of Special Days to an accumulation of two each month to be used however I want. They must all be used before an N day is defined as a failure. This provides me a buffer against any failures. I now have ...

Kathleen

Mizmc wrote: yum a good S day save up.

Mizmic,
That is the best summary I have seen of why this diet works!
Kathleen

Kathleen

anndelise,
Down six pounds in one month. That's terrific! I was down three, maybe, but my plates looked like Mount Olympus. It's great to customize this philosophy to suit our individual personalities and social life.
Kathleen

Kathleen

Summary for October, 2008: DAY 24 - 10/1/08: SPECIAL DAY (3) - CELEBRATE OUR SON MAKING STAR RANK IN SCOUTS DAY 25 - 10/2/08: SUCCESS (3) DAY 26 - 10/3/08: SUCCESS (3) DAY 27 - 10/4/08: S DAY (3) DAY 28 - 10/5/08: S DAY (3) DAY 29 - 10/6/08: SUCCESS (3) Day 30 - 10/7/08: SUCCESS (3) DAY 31 - 10/8/08...

Kathleen

Summary for September, 2008: Goal is 100 % compliance with no seconds, no sweets, no snacks on N days. DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE Starting Weight of 215 pounds DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE 213.6 DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS DAY 6 - 9/13/08: S DAY Day 7 - 9/14/08...

Kathleen

I'm only on Day 22, but it is incredible how much easier it has gotten. I've managed two full weeks of successful N days, and that is enough that I just don't think about snacking anymore. Good luck to both of you!
Kathleen

Kathleen

The weekend eating is what prevents "diet backlash" (the unfortunate and dramatic ending to many diets) or "starvation diet" for those who actually maintain lost weight. Enjoy those S Days!

Kathleen

Terrific!!!

Kathleen

Jillybean, I read that quote years ago and have been on a search for a diet that wouldn't result in my feeling like I was on a starvation diet. For my troubles, I gained another 25 pounds, so my total weight is now 80 pounds above where I was before I got married. Last year, I had several surgeries ...

Kathleen

Blueskighs, Last Saturday, I ate so much I got sick. Today is very different. I had two drumsticks and 1 Haagen Dazs ice cream bar, but other than that, my eating was very normal. The assurance of "unconditional permission to eat" on S Days really does make it OK to just not eat so much on those day...

Kathleen

Melissa,
I'm glad to see a post of yours. What's your update?
Kathleen

Kathleen

DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE (Starting weight of 215 pounds). DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS DAY 6 - 9/13/08: S DAY Day 7 - 9/14/08: S DAY DAY 8 - 9/15/08: SUCCESS DAY 9 - 9/16/08: SUCCESS (2)* DAY 10 - 9/17/08: SUCCESS (2) DAY 11 - 9/18...

Kathleen

When I was about 10 years old, my younger brother held me underwater at a pool. I was surprised by my strength as I pushed my way to the surface of the water. That same drive to survive is what is triggered when I diet. It results in overeating. I look forward to the day when my body's survival mech...

Kathleen

Jilly, I think Intuitive Eating sounds like so much common sense, and yet I'm just happy to be back to eating meals with my family. Consider that the S-Day concept is really the key differentiating factor in this diet. You still have those days of "unconditional permission to eat" (from Intuitive Ea...

Kathleen

I put my kids on the No Sweets portion of the diet. My 9 year old and 7 year old were being taken home from school, and they had a conversation with me that reveals human nature only too well: Katie (9 year old): It's a Super Hot day, so it's a Special Day. Ellie (7): Hey, we could watch Superman, a...

Kathleen

Summary for the current month: DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS DAY 6 - 9/13/08: S DAY Day 7 - 9/14/08: S DAY DAY 8 - 9/15/08: SUCCESS DAY 9 - 9/16/08: SUCCESS (2)* DAY 10 - 9/17/08: SUCCESS (2) DAY 11 - 9/18/0...

Kathleen

Crystal, That's great! Last week, I had a terrible time getting through one week of SUCCESSes and then I ate so much on the weekend I got sick! If that happens to you, don't be hard on yourself -- at all. This week has been about 1/5th as difficult for me as last week. Just focus on those weekdays. ...

Kathleen

I'm on Day 18, and the first four days were the hardest! It gets easier. If you look at old blogs, it looks to me like the key is to make absolutely, positively sure that you have no sweets, no seconds, and no snacks on N days. Your body adjusts quickly to that, especially if you give yourself uncon...

Kathleen

OK, I was trying to figure out where I read about "perfect compliance", and I am fairly sure it was from a book by Dr. Richard B. Stuart, who wrote diet books in the 70s. I ordered two books from Amazon's out of print booksellers, and one came yesterday. The book is called Act Thin, Stay Thin. The c...

Kathleen

Janie, I don't know that I'll have many more insights. The best thing about The No Hassle Diet is I don't have to spend time obsessing about it. It will quickly become part of my unconscious routine, like brushing my teeth in the morning. If I don't end up at an acceptable weight, the only change I ...

Kathleen · Day 17: 9/24/08: **SUCCESS (2)**

Day 17: 9/24/08: SUCCESS (2)

Kathleen

I have to have a colonosocpy next month and decided to expand S days to include Surgery days! I've heard that the prep worse than the surgery. Good luck!
Kathleen

Kathleen

How about not weighing yourself so that you focus exclusively on no sweets, no seconds, and no snacks on N Days? It will take off some of the pressure that you are putting yourself on. I'm not weighing myself until Christmas.
Kathleen

Kathleen

Day 16: 9/23/08: SUCCESS (2) I see it. I see it I see it. I can have my life back. I don't have to be making eating decisions on a minute by minute basis: Am I hungry? Am I not? Was that a stomach noise or a hunger growl? Is this a good enough reason for an exception? Let me tell you -- this is a te...

Kathleen

The word that comes to mind with this diet is "fidelity". Before I got married, I was worried about the possibility of being unfaithful. I simply decided that I would run from any relationship with another guy that had any hint whatsoever of being intimate. That's what Reinhard says about "build fen...

Kathleen

Great! Just make sure S Days are S Days and not N Days.

Kathleen

This is from pages 79 - 80 of Mindless Eating : "Simply thinking of food can make you hungry. Just like Pavlov's dogs, we salivate (subtly) when we hear, see, or smell something we associate with food -- like a shiny foil-wrapped piece of milk chocolate. Even though we haven't touched the chocolate,...

Kathleen

I have to laugh at what your husband said -- That's what S Days are for. For the first weekend, my husband said, "You sure took advantage of the S Days." On the second weekend, after overeating so much in front of his brother's family that I had to sleep all afternoon, he gave me a lecture about how...

Kathleen

Janie, Thank you. The first week -- four failures and one success -- was harder than last week, and this week is seeming to be easier than last week. I just keep thinking that the key to this diet is "perfect compliance." You have to make a commitment that you will never ever fail. I failed the firs...

Kathleen

Janie, The eat when you are hungry approach seemed ideal. They do say stop when you are full, but I had no idea what fullness was. All I knew was I couldn't eat until my next growl. My husband teased me a bit about this. Once, when my stomach growled, we were driving with the family. I said it growl...

Kathleen

I made it through the night without eating. I spent some time reading old blogs. People tend to fail once, recover for a few days, then admit to failing and drop out of sight. I think failing even once is a big deal. I've modified the No S Diet so that I predictably accumulate two exception days per...

Kathleen

DAY 15 - 9/22/08: SUCCESS (2) I can't sleep because I didn't have as much to eat as I am accustomed to eating. My stomach is making noises, which has been a trigger for me to eat. I have been lying in bed for about an hour telling myself that it will be easier next time if I pass the test this time,...

Kathleen

Gigianne, I'm not upset about the weekend. To me, it is part and parcel of understanding how much food feels good. Today, I ate too little. My son has been looking at my dinner plate heaped with food and making comments, so tonight I had a large but not grossly large plate of spaghetti with meatball...

Kathleen

It's so great to look at your blog and see what is likely to be in my future!

Kathleen

Janie, I'm not sure I'm going to try anything beyond "Take care of the N Days, and the S Days will take care of themselves." The reason why is that the "unconditional permisison to eat" (a phrase from the book Intuitive Eating ) on Saturday and Sunday is what gives me the ability to get through five...

Kathleen

LA Loser, Thanks for the encouragement! I don't feel at all guilty about eating so much over the weekend. My one and only goal at this point is to have five days of Ns, and I think a lot of eating on the weekends will help me. Over time, I'll trust that my eating will diminish. I am confident that t...

Kathleen

Summary for the current month: DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS DAY 6 - 9/13/08: S DAY Day 7 - 9/14/08: S DAY DAY 8 - 9/15/08: SUCCESS DAY 9 - 9/16/08: SUCCESS (2)* DAY 10 - 9/17/08: SUCCESS (2) DAY 11 - 9/18/0...

Kathleen

Pete, I think there may be another explanation. Your S Days may not seem like days of "unconditional permisison to eat" (to quote a phrase from another book, Intuitive Eating). You are calling your Saturday a SUCCESS. Well, I could call my Saturday a SUCCESS as well, since it was an S Day. The fact ...

Kathleen

Thanks for the encouragement. Today was an EASY day because I knew that tomorrow I am free to eat whatever I want. I only have 6 1/2 hours to go before the first S DAY begins, and I think I won't have any problem making it. It struck me that this is the exact opposite of the normal diet approach -- ...

Kathleen

That's wonderful! I also am not weighing myself. I don't think it's evil. I just think that it tends to provide information which leads to your making a different decision, like to try something other than the No S Diet. It's much more meaningful to fit into clothes that were too tight for you to we...

Kathleen

Summary of outcome from start of diet on September 8, 2008 (DAY 1) to present: September, 2008: 4 FAILURE (first four days), 5 SUCCESS, 2 S DAYS Summary for the current month: DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS D...

Kathleen

Janie, All I'm trying to do is have three platefuls at meals and that's it. My kids are teasing me about the pile-up on those plates. I do think that a dive-in approach (perfect compliance) will make it easier very quickly, but right now I'm just gripping the edge of the chair. Tomorrow morning, I t...

Kathleen

I was just wondering. I think that, for me, dumping some food and putting something else on the plate would be crossing a line that would lead to overeating. For you, it may well be different. That was the reason for my question.
Kathleen

Kathleen

Pete, I'm hanging on by my fingernails with this diet, but what I see that is different about it is that you restrict food only on weekdays. Weekends are fundamentally different. By saying SUCCESS rather than S DAY for Saturday and Sunday, you aren't seeming to differentiate between a successful N D...

Kathleen

6:30 PM: My dinner plate was loaded down with 1 carrot, rice, Chinese vegetables, a piece of chicken, a cup of granola with milk, a cheese stick, and a nectarine. I also had a glass of milk. I didn't even enjoy it. I just wanted to eat. The Hunger Satisfaction Diet (eat only when hungry) was like to...

Kathleen

5 PM: Sadly, my resolve is waivering. I want to eat. I really, really want to eat. The kids are watching TV, and I'm lying down. I'm going to prepare an early dinner and eat as much as I can fit on a plate. What I need to do here is look on these diets as only five days long. I have only 30 hours to...

Kathleen

Nothing like my trying to learn from the mistakes of others -- I have a question for you. Have you ever before dumped out something you didn't like and replace it with other food? I'm wondering if you didn't fail before you ate the cookies. The other night, I had loaded up my plate with something it...

Kathleen

Gigianne, Don't worry about my limiting portion size at meals! Yesterday, my seven year old told me I had snacks and seconds on my one plate! It was multi-layered, but heck this is the first successful week. Last week, I started on Monday and had four straight failures before a success. With my over...

Kathleen

Janie, I agree that S DAYS are the key. I think you wrote something about how you take care of the N days, and the S days take care of themselves. I'm trying to take care of this N day. I had breakfast at 6:30 AM this morning, and now it is nearing 10. I leave in about 1/2 hour to go volunteer at th...

Kathleen

It's great reading your blog to pick up tips. I didn't see a single failure. That's great! For me, S DAYS will be a free for all. It's not that I'm being a "bozo" as was in the book. It's that it's hard enough just to work on the N Days. I want a perfect score of always getting through N Days before...

Kathleen

Gigianne, I agree with you on how wonderful it is to be able to eat with the family. Over the summer, when I was trying to eat only after a hunger growl, I was constantly missing meals and then stuffing myself later. I must admit that I learned a lot about hunger growls that I didn't know. For examp...

Kathleen

DAY 10 - 9/17/08: SUCCESS (2) My dinner plate was piled high with food, and my 7 year old told me I wasn't following the diet. She said the plate had two snacks (an apple and a carrot) and seconds (a second beef taco). It all fit on one dinner plate, so I consider myself following the diet, but I wa...

Kathleen

Pete,
How can a Sunday be a failure? Sunday is an S Day, and you can eat what you want!
Kathleen

Kathleen

Thanks!

Kathleen

I tried deleting the word FAILURE and then selecting a font size of RED. [color=red][/color] What I got was default still selected as Font colour but the text as shown before the word What in this sentence. I can't seem to figure out how to change colors.

Kathleen

I'm trying without success to change color for days. I have in my current blog: DAY 9: SUCCESS. I'd like to make SUCCESS green. What I did was select the text for SUCCESS, go to the drop down menu next to Fond colour:, select Green, and press enter. This is what I got: [color=green]SUCCESS[/color] W...

Kathleen

DAY 9 - 9/16/08: SUCCESS (2 EXCEPTION DAYS AVAILABLE TO BE USED) It's nice to blog instead of just to keep a journal. I went back to my original post and gave more of an explanation of how I am viewing this diet. The context of the diet is what I weigh on Christmas Day, since I have involved my chil...

Kathleen

DAY 1 - 9/8/08: FAILURE DAY 2 - 9/9/08: FAILURE DAY 3 - 9/10/08: FAILURE DAY 4 - 9/11/08: FAILURE DAY 5 - 9/12/08: SUCCESS DAY 6 - 9/13/08: S DAY Day 7 - 9/14/08: S DAY DAY 8 - 9/15/08: SUCCESS Back in January, 2004, when I weighed a mere 190 pounds, I decided to keep a journal and look at different...

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