Everyday Systems

oolala53

Giving in usually just causes urges to keep happening where as waiting it out meant it was gone for good!!

Ain't that sumpin?

oolala53

Do what seems to make moderation systematic for you, but know that we have had some type 2 diabetics here that found that after a period of adjustment, they did just fine with not snacking. The biggest problem with snacking is it means you have to be willing to cover less of your meal plates or use ...

oolala53

Out of curiosity, ladybird, was the short period of time feeling some cravings worth it? I know on my other site, there are people who are willing to give up a lot so they will never have a craving. I was willing for years to navigate them because I just couldn't accept the image of myself as "havin...

oolala53

Thanks, Octavia! Well, I've been going through a bit of a dark night of the soul about all this eating stuff. I thought I had written about it, but it looks like I haven't and I'm not up for it now. But I had talked on another thread about the book Never Binge Again and two members there expressed a...

oolala53

It is so easy for me to feel deflated by some other people's reactions to me, and I don't have anybody at home to tell me I'm fine! I had normally been one to just say what I wanted earlier in life but as years have gone on, I've shrunk back, yet still end up bursting out with something that I feel ...

oolala53

Though it's been pretty well covered, I'd say consider limiting taste tests to new recipes. But keeping it to even less than a teaspoon and only a couple of those might work, too.

oolala53

You might not like this but after many years, I've come to the conclusion that it could be two things. 1. Sweets and processed foods are literally depressive drugs, or have a quick high and the nearly inevitable down. That's why I have always said never to believe any conclusions about yourself (or ...

oolala53

This is going to sound outrageous and impossible in your situation but the ex-boyfriend of a friend, a very cool guy, recovered alcoholic, and a successful junior high teacher with excellent rapport with his students, was a single dad with full custody. His ex had big drug problems. HIs high school ...

oolala53

Much gratitude.

oolala53

I hate to discourage anyone but even ten years in I am grappling with this. I just find it so hard to find activities that seem as rewarding as food, or if not food, reading about satiety, or traditional societies and their eating, etc. All of which is almost the same thing. And it seems it is exact...

oolala53

That IS a victory! And counting it is helpful in establishing habit.

oolala53

A strategy taught by Dr. Glenn Livingston- actually, he didn't invent it but just systematically incorporated it into his program, is to write out what you imagine will happen in your life in 5 or 10 years if you keep eating the way you're eating, including the mental suffering you do over it. That ...

oolala53

I gently recommend that you look at the hierarchy of recommended beverages between meals. Milk is the LAST one on the list. And definitely since it is caloric, and not very low caloric, I suggest it should be used only in the presence of true, strong hunger, not the psychological urge to eat. Contin...

oolala53

Octavia, you are deliciously evil.

oolala53

Saying hi and reporting that with further refinements to my meals I now weigh about the same as I did when I was a sophomore in high school- 50 years ago.

oolala53

Well, since I never had any real health issues- though they may have developed later-... Yes but was I struggling for the right reasons? Actually, I don't think of myself as having had a weight problem as much as I had an addiction to terrible foods and wrestled with the societal expectation of medi...

oolala53

I thought afterwards that it might have seemed I was assuming something. I probably was, since you sounded pretty exasperated. But it's amazing what sleep and diversion does. Also all my diatribe on junk food seemed overdone, as I was falling asleep last night, because I'm pretty sure fast food and ...

oolala53

I find controlling my eating helps me cope, though it doesn't feel like I'm controlling it as much as it is just how I usually eat now. If I don't eat that way, I feel worse physically and I notice now when disturbing, fearful thoughts are arising and I have a heavy feeling that I used to think of a...

oolala53

Funny that this is the topic because the heartburn had gone away since I posted about the bicarb soda, but tonight I feel it very mildly and I have had mostly veggies and nuts today, plus a few olives. Doing my quarterly thing. You won't believe it but I am considering paying for course on eating. I...

oolala53

Wait, you did go through a period of time where you let the rules go and you gained quite a bit of weight, right? I was not trying to talk you out of losing weight, actually, but just to know that for your body, it's obviously not getting there even with all you've done and would take something very...

oolala53

Linda, if you really think you cannot be happy unless you are at a lower weight, then I send you strength vibes because it's going to take some kind of precision eating enough less of dense food. It's shocking how little food some bodies need for it to do its thing of pulling out fat stores. Hope it...

oolala53

Blahs seem to come and go. I can't find a consistent pattern. I just try not to make them worse, though who knows? Maybe even worse ones will lead somewhere. Best wishes for the next stage plan. Conviction is good stuff, even better than inspiration, IMO. I need to write an entry on the difference f...

oolala53

I cannot wait for hunger 3. It would take most of the day. But had never thought hunger was inherently bad. And most of my overeating has been done when not hungry, in fact, within three hours of the last meal. I won't say I was attracted only to wholesome food when I was hungry, but 1) though cooki...

oolala53

And what's worth the "enjoyment of life" can change over time. Doesn't mean it suddenly gets breezy but the battles wane in number and are over a lot faster.

oolala53

Remember the word that got left off the subtitle because it just didn't flow: sometimes. No S was never meant to be a free-for-all of eating all weekend. Reinhard even says in the book that eventually, S days will look almost the same as N days, but with one or two S's that really do the trick. It s...

oolala53

Last night, it dawned on me that I could use bicarbonate of soda. The burning weakened by the time I went to bed and hasn't been back. I ate takeout from a vegan "fast" food restaurant, including French fries, so I got a mix of my regular foods and heavier stuff. So far, so good. (This is when there...

oolala53

Forgot to say that SIL for me is "shelter in place." Here's something new and not fun. I've started to have the symptoms of heartburn. NOOO. I have been feeling like I am basically in the groove, and don't want to have to mess with it much. I've cut so many foods from my life, willingly, but able to...

oolala53

Hi Linda and Auto! tx Linda for posting the pic. I' just tried again but when I click on the pic, I get no option on the size. It just goes straight to telling me it's too big. sigh I used the tab at the bottom that says "attachments>"

oolala53

I said somewhere here on this board or somewhere that from my observations (and I spend woefully too much time on all this, but it's better than eating) that people who had some kind of meal focus in place before COVID19 were at a distinct advantage. If a person was already susceptible to opportunis...

oolala53

Welcome back, Jean! Weighing less than you did ten years ago when you started is against the odds in your age group, I'm pretty sure! But I completely get the dissatisfaction with too much freedom. I always suspected that it actually isn't natural to be moderate with food in general; there have been...

oolala53

Stopping in to say hi. Ooo, all you parents of teens. I used to have them in class for 20 years. I feel for ya! Been retired for a year and a half; sometimes the education system or the like will come up in conversations and I will shudder and be so glad I don't have to try to solve those problems a...

oolala53

Auto, I hope you'll forgive me for not researching this and knowing your history more, but I noticed in your signature section that it looked like there was a major drop in weight from Oct. of 2018 to Oct. of 2019. May I ask what shifted? It's funny I should ask because when I've had drops and someo...

oolala53

The secure in ourselves one is the real key. I am aware of a deep down sense of a lack of safety and have been for awhile. It's not on the surface, but it bubbles up in all kinds of ways, especially the ease in which I get irritated with other people, on the phone, the few times I am in stores, etc....

oolala53

Ready for your annual update!

oolala53

Bluebell! So nice to see you. Yes, there is an amazing solidity that comes with accepting that something is your best option and that best option is actually not asking for the moon. Knowing I just could not sustain anything else ten years ago was what kept me at No S, though I sometimes added "laye...

oolala53

Hi, BrightAngel! The queen of honesty regarding caloric intake. We don't get alerts when there are now comments, so I missed your post. Hope you are well.

oolala53

Soliadegloria, it is actually my pleasure, and am grateful that anyone will listen, and even more, get any help out of it. i long to make a contribution. I get some satisfaction from knowing that Reinhard has said he has never been able to convince even one family member to take this up. If he, who ...

oolala53

If I may say, I detect a bit of a problem in how hard it sounds like it was to get to 25 lbs. down. Would you be willing to compromise on the amount of loss for more ease? Before I offer to inundate you with a set of steps way more fussy (in terms of thinking) than No S, have you ever actually just ...

oolala53

Robin, I am over ten years in and I am very sure that after four decades of grappling with my eating before that, there was nothing else out there that I was willing to try that could have tamed me the way No S has. I still marvel that I can walk down a candy or cookie aisle at a supermarket- for so...

oolala53

Wow, it's amazing that I happened to come and look at this. We used to get email alerts when there were new posts on any threads we posted on, but that hasn't happened in a long time. I've linked a rather long article; I hope it's helpful. Basically, I interpreted that my frequent urges to eat were ...

oolala53

Congrats! I think it's also a testament to the program that you feel it has helped you with binging even though you have never gotten 21 days straight under your belt until now!

oolala53

I tend to hide when failing. I bought only a couple of processed foods back in March. I wouldn't say I wolfed them, but I served myself servings of them so often that they were gone long before I was out of food I could have stretched them out with. Low satiety foods are no joke!

oolala53

Dave, I think it's so wise that you didn't just throw in the whole towel, but simply added a day. You are still ahead of the eat-whenever-you-want game! Heather, also a perfectly reasonable mod for now. I assume you can also adjust to possibly just maintaining, but with all the jokes on the web abou...

oolala53

Hear, hear, gingerpie! I was one of those who DID dicker over it all for nearly 40 years. Couldn't face 20 more years of it full throttle, which doesn't mean it's never a struggle. I hope so much my experience will say some younger women years of misery.

oolala53

Haven't seen you for awhile. I hope you fell and got up without telling us.

oolala53

Alas, even weak tea is unpleasant-I've tried it-, but I remembered something that I've been applying recently. Salt can cut bitterness. In fact, I remembered that when I go to an Asian restaurant where they almost automatically serve tea, I put a little soy sauce in it and kind of like it. I have no...

oolala53

Best to Gingerpie, but I want to add that reminding myself of my motivations over and over was key in getting to habit. And a lot of them had more to do with wanting to overcome my compulsive overeating and be a moderate eater than weigh a certain amount. If it had been weight, I would have been mis...

oolala53

Welcome back! I remembered the name from years ago (actually didn't realize it was that long ago- part of being old) and went back to look at your thread. Yes, it has been a struggle, and I'm very glad to read that you say you I HAVE NO OTHER OPTION BUT TO FOLLOW THIS PLAN FOR LIFE. But now it sound...

oolala53

Some people aren't going to be able to use this at times, or possibly early on because they have come to No S traumatized by "healthy." This question would be great for such users after they/heavy have gone through their "Don't tell me what to eat!" phase, and possibly aren't getting the loss they w...

oolala53

You're back! It looks like most people are just using the check-in threads, but there are some dedicated users there. As you can see, I drop in sometimes. Still give mad props to No S. A disadvantage for me now is that I do not get an email alert when someone adds to a thread. Where should I look wh...

oolala53

Welcome! How fun that there is no reason to have to talk yourself into this! But having the book is still a nice backup.

oolala53

You don't have to be a mom to have a feeling of guilt about how you are handling life! But childrearing a bigger deal than most stuff. (Honestly, though, I think it's a relatively modern interest to look at one's part in a problem. I think my parents rarely thought they might have been the problem. ...

oolala53

TX, auto. It was a little weird, but has been overshadowed by ensuing events for so many. And in the grand scheme of things. is not that different from millions of other deaths that happen every day but which we aren't willing to read headlines of every day. Oh, I'll get off that soapbox before I ge...

oolala53

Hi! I kind of browsed around your thread. Hope it's okay that I didn't read everything. I have gotten a lot more prissy about my nutrition over ten years here. Is it part of the obsession or is it being practical because thin or not, we had problems with some degenerative disease even before the ave...

oolala53

Welcome! I am one to say there are really no guarantees, not even with No S- though it saved my eating life-, but I wager that you will be pleased with the sense of satisfaction from sticking with meals. You might even enjoy your food more!

oolala53

SB, that's basically what mocha is, though I think officially that has some kind of creamer. You'll be likely looking at a doppelganger of me if you ever see me drinking black coffee with or without cocoa. So far, I'd rather suffer the cravings.

oolala53

I never had an outright weight loss goal, and never did anything specific to actually lose, so I never feared I couldn't keep off what I lost. I was VERY interested in determining what was moderate eating for me and adjusting for that over time led to 40 lbs. off and maintained. (Actually I weigh le...

oolala53

I see you have a checkin thread. See you there!

oolala53

Hi, Dana! I gently suggest you start thinking that you tell your body when to eat, not when it wants it. We have paired eating with countless situations, thoughts, places, people, and on and on and on. It almost never had to do with need, just a paired stimulus. Humans are opportunistic eaters! But ...

oolala53

I visit No S so seldom these days that I don't know if I am repeating myself. I don't have kids but will say something gently: I wish very much that my mother had made me participate more in helping around the house. There were three of us and I think all of us should have been involved in doing dis...

oolala53

Good work! Just want to say that even though this bone broth recipe sounds heavenly, when I was eating chickens, I would always save the bones (cooked turkey legs all year, too.) and just the bones, water, salt, and sometimes dried lemons made a serviceable base broth. For anyone too intimidated by ...

oolala53

Belated welcome back!

Stay on the ship this time. You already know what it's like to jump. just make sure you're isolating while you do...

oolala53

Sticking to the rules when it feels hard is what really seals this as a habit.

oolala53

I think that mod is the way those foods are meant to be. I may have said already that I also don't like that Hansen isn't in favor of eating less overall. She was never heavy! Some people are going to need to eat less even when they aren't bingeing. So glad you've gone this long on an even eating ke...

oolala53

Welcome! You can find some real peace here. And down the line, you may find that you're willing to "restrict" all on your own with no bingeing. Just keep going.

oolala53

Did I miss something? Were you systematically doing something else besides three meals?

Hang in there!

oolala53

Hi, and welcome! You sure picked a time to start! Actually, you did, as systematic moderation is a GREAT way to counteract stress. You seem to be doing well, but in case things get rough, I humbly suggest you rehearse thinking, "Whew, I got terribly stressed, so OF COURSE I stuck to my eating plan. ...

oolala53

I don't want to get maudlin, as I'm sure everyone will have some kind of story when this is over, but a COVID-19 death has affected my extended family-by-marriage. I am amazed because at that point, CA had lost only 19 people to it. How can I have a connection when the odds at this point are so agai...

oolala53

Such a different world since my last post. I went to my last party for awhile for St. Patrick's day last Saturday. My friend has one nearly every year. It was a great send off to social life for awhile, though people were being risky, IMHO. It was the first year I left without feeling stuffed. Skipp...

oolala53

If I may, I posted a couple of links to blogs on the general discussion page that deal with combatting the thinking behind crisis/stress eating. Big hugs having Doc on the front lines. A doctor friend of mine lives in WA for part of the year. He is in insurance, and usually is involved in other stuf...

oolala53

I hope it's okay I post a link to a woman whose specialty is supporting binge eaters who want to quit. She exposes the common thinking our brains will come up with to take advantage of opportunistic eating. I think just about all of it applies to the kind of thinking that brains use to derail us fro...

oolala53

Habits first! If your plates can't be ideal right now, it's a lot to ask for loss, too. IMHO. These are weird times, but nothing that can get in the way, for the most part, of a having a few one-plate meals. In my experience, getting more veggies on the plate to take up room has been crucial. In due...

oolala53

Welcome again, SB. Hey, I"m on another site, and believe me, people making grand pronouncements and almost immediately dropping off is heartbreakingly common, enough that I often secretly feel fear for the person posting, especially when they sound really excited. It's part of the "drug" cycle. Some...

oolala53

Sounds like it's been quite a year. :cry: I am glad to hear you feel you're getting a handle on it. Also glad to think I've played any part. I mentioned Kathryn Hansen above. She eschewed being actively involved with bingers for a long time, but apparently has ramped up, has a training and all that....

oolala53

"A prestigious team of medical scientists has projected that by 2030, nearly one in two adults will be obese, and nearly one in four will be severely obese. The estimates are thought to be particularly reliable, as the team corrected for current underestimates of weight given by individuals in natio...

oolala53

I'm sure a lot of good stuff is going on during 41-hour fasts, too, but if you can do three more hours without much suffering, mazel tov. Three days a week is stellar. May I ask what your appetite seems like on the other days?

oolala53

Back in the groove but I spend very little time eating with other people, so not much reason to eat beyond reason. I have gotten narrow in my eating in a way that I started No S saying I never wanted to have to do, but I just find that it makes more sense for my health to just eat what I think of as...

oolala53

They sure do. LOVE those pics, LAB. (I'm at the point now where a plate with no green on it for lunch or dinner is hardly a meal.) I guessed right about the second link. Fewer veggies, more calories. My plates look loaded these days. I hope that information doesn't completely demoralize people. A pe...

oolala53

Leafygreens, hi! Nice to see you. Never tried that. I do often put a tablespoon of cocoa powder in my coffee but that also has some kind of creamer and stevia in it. I find that that does not lead me to want chocolate candy or anything later. I keep trying to get used to black coffee or green tea bu...

oolala53

I have a rental- I live in one side of a duplex- here in San Diego and a duplex in Utah. But what I was interested in was something more ambitious: an apartment building. It's a whole other ballgame. You get your dough on those by being the person to find and broker a deal using investor money. I wo...

oolala53

Not keto here, either! That low carb emphasis (for decades long use) scares me. I started listening to Fung long before his book came out. He definitely has his use, but all authors have a bias. It is in the nature of the temperament of people drawn to such work to develop a perspective and share it...

oolala53

Was it the Freakonomics guy who did a comparison about whether it was better to be a big fish in a less prestigious pond or a little fish in a hoity-toity one? I'm pretty sure it was shown that people who did WELL at smaller, humbler schools did just as well if not better later in life. Not to say t...

oolala53

I affirm that in a year, your name will be even more accurate! Warmest wishes.

oolala53

I know No S isn't supposed to be about calories, but it cannot ignore the laws of physics. If you lose weight, you will need less food to sustain you than if you had never lost weight, or you will need more activity, or both. The National Weight Loss Registry (people who have maintained a loss of 30...

oolala53

Belated Happy New Year! I keep saying THIS is the year for consistent exercise. It's helpful to see you say there's no point in expecting loftier goals when I haven't met less lofty ones before.

oolala53

Glad it's feeling easy and pleasurable.

oolala53

Agreed re: your healing. Kudos for perfect meals, in your words.

oolala53

Belated happy 2020. Keep doing your best! Try not to fear going longer without food. Our bodies can get much better at breaking into their stores of glycogen and fat if they get practice! Apparently, it takes about three to five weeks to adjust to longer times, though I'm sure there are limits to th...

oolala53

I have been trying to be so careful about my news exposure, though I am addicted to my NYT app on my phone. (I usually scroll fast past many headlines.) That's how I found out about the Presidential Medal of Honor award. I was sick to my stomach for a lot of the day. Can this really all be true? For...

oolala53

Part of my pathology that I keep getting drawn to this. Can't believe you didn't mention NO sugar or flour and permanently weighing and measuring all food, including restaurant food. I would have to be trying to combat a fatal disease to do that. (Ironically, because I have been measuring my food fo...

oolala53

Thanks, auto and Soprano. Most of the time, it's feeling pretty good. I had one obvious rebellious hour but there was no way I was going to rebel with the old standbys. I had none of that sense of,"Well, I just don't care." So grateful not to be haunted by that these days. Just went to a real estate...

oolala53

I sent you a PM where I asked if you would start a thread, but I see you have. I have made so many changes over the years. Sometimes when people would see that I had lost more weight, they would ask what I'd been doing, but I knew the recent change had been build on the previous habits, and sometime...

oolala53

Lots of good news. I keep seeing that 22% fat and feel a little green with envy. And keep feeling pretty! I would take not being as attractive as I think I am over being pretty and not feeling it any day. If I may say, I like that you sound like you are enriching your life, which is going to remain ...

oolala53

Welcome back! I am PM-ing you, but I will say here that somewhere on here I have seen people who managed GORD, but I can't remember what if any mods they used. No S is as much about being systematic as it is the number of meals. It seems you have big incentive to make changes, if you can really make...

oolala53

Not sure what I could do even from home that I know enough about and that I would actually like doing. If only someone would pay to me to post here, on Spark, on the no s Facebook page... :twisted: CALORIE and FOOD LIMITATION TALK ALERT! NOT ABOUT THE WEIGHT LOSS! WAY MORE PRESCRIPTIVE THAN VANILLA!...

oolala53

Welcome back. You might have to do some juggling of what's on your plate, but remember what your options are... I can't imagine snacks, sweets, and/or seconds were not part of the reason you put on 15 lbs., so the prognosis is good! No S is not a bad way to spend a year anyway.

oolala53

How delightful to hear from you! And that things are going well. Oh, besides wishing I couldn't wait to exercise, I kinda wish there was some work I want to do. But not seriously looking to solve that minor problem. I like freedom, too. Yesterday I met with ex-colleagues, went to a tap dance class, ...

oolala53

I know this thread isn't about this, but you must be enjoying your meals so much more without the snacking.

oolala53

Yay! Just keep going.

oolala53

Be sure to deal with the self-hatred side of things. Getting angry with oneself after a binge actually increases the chance it will be repeated. It is PART of the binge habit/cycle! Interrupting any cycle at any point helps weaken it. No matter what, keep working your N days. And you MAY have to go ...

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