Fear of weight loss success

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eschano
Posts: 2642
Joined: Wed Jul 18, 2012 2:20 pm

Fear of weight loss success

Post by eschano » Fri Aug 01, 2014 2:19 pm

Hi all,

I found this article http://www.yourtango.com/experts/kate-e ... cess-scary and I felt quite moved reading it. I know I have problems with weight loss. When a new lower number on the scale shows up I sabotage it immediately, until I feel safe with it and then lose some more weight.

Now this might not be an issue for any of you but just in case it is I thought I'd mention it. For me it definitely has something to do with self-definition. And also with stereotypes I attribute to being a bit round and being slim. I am working on it!
eschano - Vanilla rocks!

July 2012- January 2016
Started again January 2021

ironchef
Posts: 1630
Joined: Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:12 am
Location: Australia

Post by ironchef » Fri Aug 01, 2014 11:19 pm

Interesting article, thanks for sharing. While I'm not sure I would categorise the emotion as fear, I definitely have felt that discomfort when I have those experiences where I would previously have turned to food. It can sometimes take me a moment to shake myself and remember that I can't eat my way through and so I am going to have to deal with whatever it is: boredom, anxiety, etc. Scared, not sure, but annoyed and thrown out of a long standing comfort zone, yup!

One thing I've been disappointed about when losing this weight and keeping it off, is that body commentary and social perception of "ownership" of my appearance and eating habits has not changed. I would say I get as many comments, if not more, than I did previously. I had a false belief that this would change when I was at a "society approved" weight, but turns out that commentary on my clothes, hair, baking, weight distribution (!), nutrient intake, etc remains. I say disappointing, but the upside is that my firm belief that No S is sensible and humane gives me a good armour of confidence now that I did not have previously.

automatedeating
Posts: 5305
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 2:16 pm

Post by automatedeating » Sat Aug 02, 2014 12:49 am

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, eschano and ironchef. All I have to add is something many others have noticed before me: even though I have lost weight and I'm taking better care of myself, my body image hasn't changed. I stil feel fat some days, and sexy on other days..... regardless of what the scale says. Losing weight has not fixed my body image (that said, I haven't lost a lot of weight). It's weird but true: my weight is not directly related to my body image!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6
4/21 - 25.2

clarinetgal
Posts: 1709
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 4:16 am
Location: Western Washington State

Post by clarinetgal » Mon Aug 04, 2014 6:39 am

Wow, I can completely relate to this! I think that is why my weight loss journey has taken so long: every time I get to a new low on the scale, I feel fear ( I'm still not quite sure why), sabotage myself, gain a few pounds, and have to start all over again. :(

wosnes
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Sep 18, 2006 3:38 pm
Location: Indianapolis, IN, USA

Post by wosnes » Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:31 pm

clarinetgal wrote:Wow, I can completely relate to this! I think that is why my weight loss journey has taken so long: every time I get to a new low on the scale, I feel fear ( I'm still not quite sure why), sabotage myself, gain a few pounds, and have to start all over again. :(

My first thought when I read this was that it makes a good argument for not weighing.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."

eschano
Posts: 2642
Joined: Wed Jul 18, 2012 2:20 pm

Post by eschano » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:13 pm

It would only if I don't weigh I tuck really into the food :)
eschano - Vanilla rocks!

July 2012- January 2016
Started again January 2021

clarinetgal
Posts: 1709
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 4:16 am
Location: Western Washington State

Post by clarinetgal » Mon Aug 04, 2014 10:40 pm

Same here. If I go too long without weighing myself, I start getting complacent and overeating. I have thought about cutting back from daily weighing to only weighing myself 3 times a week (and maybe eventually, once a week).

noni
Posts: 613
Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 2:01 pm

Post by noni » Tue Aug 05, 2014 9:57 pm

wosnes, do you know when you've gained weight by the way your clothes fit? I purposely haven't weighed myself for a few weeks now, but I know I've gained. I get sloppy with my eating, but the scale is something I would love to do away with. (I can't throw it out, because of the remaining high school wrestler I have in the house.)

wosnes
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Joined: Mon Sep 18, 2006 3:38 pm
Location: Indianapolis, IN, USA

Post by wosnes » Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:21 am

noni wrote:wosnes, do you know when you've gained weight by the way your clothes fit? I purposely haven't weighed myself for a few weeks now, but I know I've gained. I get sloppy with my eating, but the scale is something I would love to do away with. (I can't throw it out, because of the remaining high school wrestler I have in the house.)
Yes, I can tell by the way my clothes fit.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."

germanherman
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Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2006 8:49 am
Location: northern germany

Post by germanherman » Wed Aug 06, 2014 9:25 am

If you want to weight yourself, always remember:

- Your body is a lot like a sponge regarding water.
- Therefore you bodyweight can change a lot in a very short time by losing or absorbing water.
- Always take a average weight over time or the weight after fixed timeframes (weeks, month, years).
- Never compare your weight today with your weight yesterday!
- Muscles are heavy!

I prefer the "Cloth and feel"-method.
Spend over 450 Dollar on some Systems, Gadgets and courses = Zero Results

Spend 15 Bucks for a Shovelglove + NoS-Diet= ;)

German by nature

aspencer27
Posts: 298
Joined: Fri Sep 16, 2011 8:26 pm

Post by aspencer27 » Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:29 pm

I stopped caring about weight a few years back when I got into strength training. I dropped two sizes, but still weighed the exact same weight. Now I get weighed at my annual physical at the doctor. Muscles are much more dense than fat, and muscles increase metabolism, too!

Like germanherman, I track on how my clothes fit. But, I think I do the same thing with that... I wouldn't say it's fear and sabotage, I think that I get more complacent - I feel like I've reached a goal and can stop fretting over it, and old habits creep back in. Why is it so hard to set good habits and so hard to break bad ones?!?!?!

Redrockin
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:34 am

Post by Redrockin » Thu Aug 07, 2014 1:43 pm

Isn't that a question for the ages? It's like there are two people living in my head. One reminds me of what I want to do, and the other makes me do things I don't want to do, and the latter is always easier than the former. But back to the scale: I have a bad relationship with it. I definitely sabotage myself, but it's not from fear of being successful, but that if it shows a few pounds down, I will celebrate by eating that cookie. Crazy!

r.jean
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Joined: Fri Dec 24, 2010 7:47 pm
Location: Midwest

Post by r.jean » Fri Aug 08, 2014 11:57 am

Interesting. Thanks for the article.
The journey is the reward.
Maintenance is progress.

snapdragon
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Location: midwest

Post by snapdragon » Sat Aug 16, 2014 12:25 pm

Aspencer, do you track protein? Have any tips foe a newbie weight lifter? I want to start lifting heavy, I don't want to track protein becuase it leads to binging and bad habits. I know I need around 100 grams a day while lifting. I am an ing on adding protein shakes and make sure my meals contain protein rich foods and hope it's enough.
Starting weight 185
Healthy BMI 139
Willingness without action is fantasy

aspencer27
Posts: 298
Joined: Fri Sep 16, 2011 8:26 pm

Post by aspencer27 » Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:53 pm

Snapdragon, I don't track protein, or anything other than NoS for diet. I just try to get enough protein at each meal - greek yogurt for breakfast, chicken or fish on my salad at lunch, and some kind of lean protein with dinner. I don't stress much about it though.

For lifting, my biggest tip is to focus on form. Doing a lighter weight but correct form is so much better for you than lifting a heavier weight but having to sacrifice form.

I really love the weight training program through Body for Life. It's quick - I do the weights in a circuit (12 reps of chest, 12 reps of shoulders, 12 reps of back, etc back-to-back with no rest), so I can get it done in 30 min. I also like the progression of Body for Life - a warm-up set (12 reps at an easy weight), increase weight for 10 reps, increase weight for 8 reps, increase weight for 6 reps. Drop the weight back down (I usually aim for my 10 rep weight) and do 12 reps, then do a different exercise for the same muscle group for 12 reps - these last two sets of 12 are for total burn-out of the muscle group.

I completely ignore their eating plan - it is very protein focused, though. I do like their measurements for the food - protein the size of your palm (although you're supposed to have 5 servings that size during your 6 meals), half the plate with veggies and a quarter with carbs - or something close to that layout.

ironchef
Posts: 1630
Joined: Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:12 am
Location: Australia

Post by ironchef » Tue Aug 19, 2014 11:30 pm

I've lifted relatively heavy in the past with up to 5 sessions a week and not worried too much about protein. I've certainly never tracked. Most people I know who tracked seriously were getting ready to go on stage (natural body building) and needed to be a certain size.

If you do a hard session and want a protein shake or meal, try to have it within 30 minutes (especially if you want to increase muscle size).

Most people on a standard Australian diet overdo the protein anyway and consequently make their kidneys work harder. Also, lots of foods, like breads and grains, have some protein, so just because you didn't fit in a Protein Source(TM) doesn't mean your body didn't get any protein.

Have fun! Lifting weights is one of my favourite things.

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