Everyday Systems

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 3:29 pm**

Later today, I have to bake and decorate six cakes for a Bake Sale tomorrow. I’m frightened that I’m going to succumb to the temptation of the frosting as I make it and lick my fingers. I’m frightened that I’m going to sample the wares too much tomorrow. Today is my brother’s AND my nephew’s birthday! (two different people who share a b-day, we're not one of THOSE families! ) That means a family dinner on Sunday- with Ice Cream Cake- and another birthday party next weekend- with a Pig Roast and MORE cake- that I have to bake! I’m not resentful of the cakes, I like to do it. I know others enjoy and appreciate it, but I’m frightened that I’m going to completely blow it! Today is the 27th day I’ve been working the No S plan and I’m 12 pounds down. I want to see THAT number grow, but this is right about the time the wheels fall off the wagon for me on most diets. I’m going on holiday on the 19th for 2 weeks. I’m hoping that the next two weekends will be proof that I CAN stick to my plan and participate in normal, social events without being on a total “See Food Diet!” I’m reaching out to, hopefully, others who can really hear what I’m saying and offer not just some words on the screen to help me through but also to send me some good energy so I can actually make it through this weekend and next without canceling the good things I have done already. ~Mia

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:19 pm**

Just make sure you eat before you do it.

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 6:24 pm**

1. have your healthy balanced meals on schedule ( this is not 12 step stuff)

when i am overwhelmed with the desire to eat compulsively, off of my meal paln ( which is NO S, by the way)

here is what i do

1. pray for God to remove the obsession with food ( or buddha, or whomever your higher power may be)

2. call someone, read something inspirational ( 12 step stuff for me)
or write about what is going on with you... you can also do some service
for someone- like a random act of kindness

3. repeat as necessary to get myself thru the day

i will be thinking of you

Donna O

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:23 pm**

You are bigger than any food. It can't force you to eat it. Don't you have the opportunity to eat out of plan EVERY day of the week? If you have managed not to do it then, you can do it now. It will be tough but you can be tougher and you will be so glad you did.
Maybe for the time being, someone else should make the cake or you could buy one to keep temptation away. Bake sales can sell store bought cookies too. You are way more important than a couple of bake sales and birthdays. No one is going to hate you for not home baking a cake. Someday, you might be able to do it without going off plan but if you can't for now, people will HAVE to accept that and move on. In the big plan of life, they will survive.

Also remember that S days include birthdays so a small piece of cake is ok. That is purely a personal decision. I too always think the world revolves around me doing things the way they were always done. I am slooowly learning that most people don't remember or care if the cake was home made or store bought. If they are there for the cake, they should bring it. If they are there for the fun and love, they don't need cake. Don't volunteer to fail.

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:36 pm**

This is a really overwhelming situation, and I think you've just got to take it one minute at a time. Will it help if you have other healthier options on hand to eat? It was suggested that before you start making the cakes you eat something. One trick is to wear a pair of clean rubber gloves when you ice the cakes. It's that rubber and icing combination that may stop you from indulging.

But I'll second what Sue said, until you know you have the No S habit down, do not volunteer to do anymore baking. Either someone else does it or you just buy the cake. Your health is a hundred times more important than giving in to family expectations around food. But the choice is yours, either choose to have a healthy environment where you eat well and in health, or choose to cave to family demands (putting them first and you last) and just keep getting fatter. What's it going to be? Health, longevity, and beauty? Or illness, shortened life, and a fat body?

No more excuses. You and you alone have the power to choose. It's time to step up and decide what you really want.

Posted: **Fri Jul 07, 2006 11:28 pm**

Hi Mia

I remember worrying about Halloween, my first year with NoS..
I really worried the life out of myself and tried to have a game plan..
In the end, I took it as an S day for my Son and myself, and guess what?
We enjoyed it...

You probably shouldn't keep offering your cake services on an ongoing basis, but fortunately, tomorrow is an S day!!!

If you *feel* like sampling, go for it.. Just be conscious... There's no way that if you truly try to be respectful to yourself and conscious in the amount you consume, that you can totally blow it...
Besides, it's an S day... If you do "blow it", then just be good during the week, and let it be...

That means a family dinner on Sunday- with Ice Cream Cake- and another birthday party next weekend- with a Pig Roast and MORE cake- that I have to bake! I’m not resentful of the cakes, I like to do it. I know others enjoy and appreciate it, but I’m frightened that I’m going to completely blow it! Today is the 27th day I’ve been working the No S plan and I’m 12 pounds down. I want to see THAT number grow, but this is right about the time the wheels fall off the wagon for me on most diets.

Enjoy yourself and here's my advice... It will work trust me...

Your long term success will include temporary ups and downs, but if you only weigh in, after a long stretch of being on plan, you won't really see any major fluctuations... If, however, you step on the scale, right after what you consider "blowing it" and I don't even mean S days, because frankly, S days have never contributed to me gaining anything back, then you will psych yourself out if you see one or two or even three pounds up...
And that, I think, is what contributes most, to really throwing in the towel..
Feeling that you "lost control, gained weight, or "blew it" as you put it" like that's the end of the world.. Then you take it so hard that you really do give up...

So I say a very healthy thing to do would be to allow yourself a few treats this weekend, and plan for it to be a teeny bit excessive, because then you won't feel like you blew anything, and if you can stay positive, you will feel like continuing your good work, and you will keep those pounds you worked so hard to lose off since that good attitude will keep your wagon wheels from falling off...

Please! Enjoy your weekend and try not to be too freaked out!
Trust in yourself to take care of you, and know that you are doing your best!

Peace and Love,

Deb

Posted: **Sat Jul 08, 2006 3:12 am**

I did it! First challenge conquered. I made the six cakes for tomorrow’s bake sale and I did not indulge. Woo-hoo!! I ate a big lunch first and had a piece of sugarless gum in my mouth when I made the batter. I let them cool until after dinner when I made the frosting. I went with the gum again, but I almost caved with the vanilla frosting.

Now, I hate peanut butter. Even the smell of it makes me nauseous, so I wear a surgical mask when I have to cook with it. So I made the PB frosting second and kept the mask on while I made the chocolate, (my weakness), and decorated the cakes. SUCCESS!!

I did treat myself to a banana after all was said and done, but it had been “scheduled” to be part of dinner, so it’s only a misdemeanor.

I want to say thanks to everyone who took the time to respond to me today. I thought of coping out on baking for tomorrow’s sale, but I really wanted to conquer this. I’ve ridden a camel in the Sahara Desert, I’ve driven across the country alone several times, I’ve been briefed on what to do in case of a civil war or military coup in Northern Africa and I’ve even eaten a hamburger in London! I’m not one to shy away from something scary, dammit!

Tomorrow’s Bake Sale benefits the kids, (I’m the Dean of the Senior class at the HS where I teach.) How can I ask them to honor their commitments and do what’s hard if I can’t do it myself? For my brother’s birthday dinner on Sunday, I’m going to indulge in a small piece of ice cream cake. At my nephew’s birthday party next weekend, I’m making the cake. It’s going to be tougher than this weekend because I’ll also be a guest at the party. I’m not going to cave and not make him his first birthday cake. Forgive me for tooting my own horn, but BEEP BEEP! People buy cakes from me, I don’t buy cakes. I refuse to let this addiction own me. I refuse to stop being who I am and let some outside force change that. Why should I let my family down because I can’t control what I put in my mouth? I WON’T!

Thanks again, everyone, I’ll keep you posted. ~Mia

Posted: **Sat Jul 08, 2006 8:50 pm**

I was worried about being at the bake sale today- temptation GALORE! I ate breakfast and chugged two bottles of Dexatrim water before I left the house. When I stopped at the store for ice, I grabbed some bananas, apples and a watermelon to sell along with the sugary stuff. (The fruit was a HIT- that and my cakes all sold out!) I drank water while I was there and finally, when my stomach was growling, I ate two slices of watermelon.

I got pizza for the kids at about 1:00, ate two slices, drank more water and 2 choc. chip cookies. THAT’S IT!!! I brought home NOTHING but the leftover water!!! We made a profit of about $425.00 and I did not clear the buffet! I would be doing the happy dance if I weren’t sunburnt and exhausted.

Next challenge, tomorrow's birthday dinner. I'm going to have a small piece of ice cream cake and ENJOY it guilt free! ~Mia

Posted: **Mon Jul 10, 2006 12:09 pm**

Birthday Dinner- handled! I did NOT finish my Caribbean Jerk Steak Sandwich OR the mac & cheese on my plate. My brother and niece took care of those. I ate my slice of ice cream cake GUILT FREE! I made sure I ate a good, healthy breakfast and lunch with lots of fruit and veggies and I drank all of my water, (I'm on 10 bottles a day.) A little exercise would have made yesterday a point in the win column, but when I stepped on the scale this morning to the same weight as yesterday, I was very pleased to see that I had not gained.

There are few things in this life so satisfying as conquering a fear! Next week's pig roast? A walk in the park. Two weeks on holiday? Not so easy,but manageable! This really is a whole new world for me.

Pardon me while I go do a happy dance.

Posted: **Mon Jul 10, 2006 1:37 pm**

Mia,

You are amazing! You are showing everyone how incredibly well No S fits into a healthy and sane lifestyle. Everything you described about the bake sale and the birthday party shows that you are positively reinforcing good eating habits. And isn't it wonderful that you can enjoy a piece of cake guilt free? Never mind the guilt free, don't you feel free? This is fabulous news. I'm extremely proud of you and I'm sending you a very big hug and kudos!

You rock!

Posted: **Mon Jul 10, 2006 2:45 pm**

Mia,

I just wanted to say that you are a HUGE inspiration. Congrats

Posted: **Tue Jul 11, 2006 3:04 am**

Thank you all so much for your love and support. Words just seem to be not enough to express how grateful I am to have this venue. I'm feeling particularly good tonight. I worked ny part time job and stayed on plan all night- despite the ready access of those sinfully delicious white chocolate bon-bons! I'm rather hungry right now, but I'm going to chug a bottle of water and go to bed- I'll be dreaming about breakfast, I am sure! Good night, all. Be well and have sweet dreams. ~Mia

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