Body image -- can anybody else identify with this?

Beckycan · Post by **Beckycan** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 4:09 pm

Last evening I got an email treat from an old high school friend (graduated 1979). She sent me about a dozen pictures of us from high school. What an eye opener!!! I was 5'8", 145# and I honestly, truthfully thought I was FAT! My body image was the same then as it is now at 290#. I never posed for pictures because I hated to see how fat I looked, but these were some candid shots that she got before I could run away and hide. I was just blown away. I think I will upload them to Walmart.com and get prints to put all over my refridgerator for whenever I'm tempted to snack!

"As a man thinks, so he is." Did I become fat because I thought myself fat??

Becky

Nichole · Post by **Nichole** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 4:13 pm

Ummm yeah, I am guilty of this too. When I was in high school (a whole 5 years ago, heh), I was about 125-135 lbs at 5'4". I think I graduated at 135 lbs. I was always thinking that I was too heavy and that I had a big belly. I'd compare myself to other girls too much, like the naturally rail-thin cheerleaders. Now that I'm a little heavier and I look back, I realize that I wasn't heavy at all. Just being a typical teenage girl.

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 4:23 pm

Though I was a little pudgy at puberty, I was slim until I was in my 40s. In my mind's eye, I'm still that slimmer person. I can't say I ever thought I was "fat." Even though I'm heavier now, I'm more physically uncomfortable than mentally uncomfortable.

Noturningback · Post by **Noturningback** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 5:16 pm

I have the same perspective from a different experience. I've been overweight just about my entire life. I weighed 65lbs in kindergarten - according to my report card - and I'm sure my teacher didn't lie. LOL

I have inched up through the years. I now weigh 265lbs @ 5'3".

I find it difficult to look at my body in a mirror or look at snapshots. I don't avoid it but, I would be lying if I said it wasn't hard to look at.

That being said, I have left a lot of self hate in my past. I lived in an embarrassed state during most of high school. I stopped living life assuming what people thought of me. It took me years to realize that I was my own worst enemy. When I honestly looked at how people treated me, I quickly realized I was mostly respected. I've never had anyone say something derogatory to my face. I'm sure people have said unkind words behind my back and I've felt a sense of being left behind - like being chosen last during PE but, who hasn't? I know those things would occure no matter what I looked like. People who say cruel things to others, due to their weight differences, are the type of person who will find something (anything) to pick on - even if I looked like "Barbie" the supposed "perfect" woman.

These days, I'm neither proud or ashamed - it just is what it is. I'm still not the girl who can look in the mirror and say "I love everything about you!" but, I'm not looking in the mirror and conjuring up cruel images/words. I just owe up to the fact that I am responsible for where I am at now and I am working to make it better - not perfect.

That was my therapy session of the day.

Hugs to all and know you are loved and not alone.

CrazyCatLady · Post by **CrazyCatLady** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:35 am

Awesome post, NoTurningBack. Thanks for sharing that! I'm glad that you are feeling better about your look.

I have felt fat since my early 20's when I went from 120 to 130 pounds. But since No S, when I see my totally round belly in the mirror, I like to think about how nice it will be when I start looking smaller. I'm trying to be much more positive about myself.

Great idea, Becky, to post those pics on the fridge!

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:37 am

well I had an evil stepmother who told me I was fat and when I look at pictures from then I am like what? where?
my grandmother had died and I was going through puberty ....
oh well,
apparently I believed her and became quite chubby,

is it a coincidence that when I lost her I lost the biggest part of my overweight?
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Blueskighs

sandooch · Post by **sandooch** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 5:11 am

I think many of us thought we were fat when we where young. I was 5'5" and 120 pounds, but I wanted to desperately be 110 pounds. I remember walking into a Weight Watchers to join and they laughed at me. I was so angry, but I guess I can see the humor in it now.

Unfortunately, teenagers today still think the same way because society still pushes them to the edge with shows about modeling, websites glorifying anorexia, and there are still way too many models in fashion magazines who are underweight. That can really mess with a young girl's head.

I try not to say I want to lose weight in front of my girls. I just tell them I want to eat to be healthy. And I've told them that if they just ate until they were satisfied, they'd be healthy. I'm happy to say that this is how they eat now, but they do tell me about their friends in school that are always dieting. It is really sad.

I wouldn't even want to weigh what I did in high school. I'd be thrilled to weigh between 145-150. And that's the honest truth!

Beckycan · Post by **Beckycan** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:55 pm

CrazyCatLady wrote:
Great idea, Becky, to post those pics on the fridge!

I'm hoping I can think myself thin, like I thought myself fat.

bonnieUK · Post by **bonnieUK** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 3:08 pm

I read recently that belief systems we have are kind of like software, sometimes we need to de-bug our software, or un-install it and re-install something better! I think a lot of us probably need to do with with our body image, positive affirmations are probably a good place to start (and avoiding saying negative things about your body will help too). I try to do this and it does help.

Interestingly, I was underweight in my early twenties (after an illness), and at that time my body image was as negative as at times when I've had a bit of extra "padding". Once the "padding" wasn't there, I just found other things not to like!

Beckycan · Post by **Beckycan** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 3:15 pm

Hi Bonnie,
Glad to see you here -- I was recently reading the old post about "habit sticking" and wondered if you were still participating on the board. I just joined recently, today is day 10 of the NoS way of eating for me. Are you still losing weight / maintaining with NoS? (Not trying to be nosy, just would like some affirmation from someone who has done the program for a while.)

Becky

bonnieUK · Post by **bonnieUK** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:29 pm

Beckycan wrote:Hi Bonnie,
Glad to see you here -- I was recently reading the old post about "habit sticking" and wondered if you were still participating on the board. I just joined recently, today is day 10 of the NoS way of eating for me. Are you still losing weight / maintaining with NoS? (Not trying to be nosy, just would like some affirmation from someone who has done the program for a while.)

Becky

Hi Becky,

Iâ€™m afraid Iâ€™m a bit of a â€œhit and runâ€ poster

I try to keep my reading of and posting on bulletin boards to a minimum because I find it a bit addictive, and as most times when Iâ€™m on a computer Iâ€™m either working or studying, I tend to have them as â€œanti-bookmarksâ€. I do make a bit of an exception for No S though, because this board is very helpful and filled with informative, intelligent posts. I probably check in here 2-3 times a week, so Iâ€™m sure I miss a lot (especially now that there are so many new members). Iâ€™m glad to see the habit stickiness thread got revived! There are lots of really good threads in the archives, which get bumped to the top occasionally when someone re-discovers them.

I didnâ€™t have much weight to lose, but have found that most of what I considered â€œextraâ€ has gone (something like 2-3kgs in the space of about 6 months, however, there was a food filled Christmas in the middle of that, followed by a month of going off habit

). I wouldnâ€™t mind getting rid of a little bit more, but am happy at the moment just maintaining â€“ which Iâ€™m doing, and most importantly keeping the habit in place (donâ€™t want to have another slip up! summer holiday season is coming up, another danger zone!).

I found however the main benefits of No S to be increased energy levels, better digestion and better sleep, while weight loss was my primary motivation it became something of an added bonus compared to the other benefits

Best of luck to you

p.s. I'm also a recovering blog addict

I guess it's a good thing Reinhard doesn't run a blog too

Feisty1 · Post by **Feisty1** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:21 pm

Noturningback wrote: I find it difficult to look at my body in a mirror or look at snapshots. I don't avoid it but, I would be lying if I said it wasn't hard to look at.

That being said, I have left a lot of self hate in my past. I stopped living life assuming what people thought of me. It took me years to realize that I was my own worst enemy. When I honestly looked at how people treated me, I quickly realized I was mostly respected. I've never had anyone say something derogatory to my face. People who say cruel things to others, due to their weight differences, are the type of person who will find something (anything) to pick on - even if I looked like "Barbie" the supposed "perfect" woman.

These days, I'm neither proud or ashamed - it just is what it is. I'm still not the girl who can look in the mirror and say "I love everything about you!" but, I'm not looking in the mirror and conjuring up cruel images/words. I just owe up to the fact that I am responsible for where I am at now and I am working to make it better - not perfect.

That was my therapy session of the day.

WOW!!! Are you sure you're NOT ME??? LOL. Well said, This was/is me to a tee!!!
Thanks for the eye opener.
Sandi

droth · Post by **droth** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:31 pm

I too graduated in 1979, and although was a fat kid, I've become an even fatter adult! When I separated from my first hubby in 2005 I was at a whopping 368 lbs. I'm now down to 272 (but my lowest was 250 when I remarried in 2007 - put back on about 30 lbs after going on insulin, taking off only about 8 lbs since Jan 1). I am going to try really hard to be well below that when I have my 2009 class reunion, (wow 30 years, where did the time go?) which gives me a little over a year. I'm making new "lifestyle changes" and glad for the noS way of life...still working on habit for now though.

Noturningback · Post by **Noturningback** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 3:21 pm

Feisty1 wrote:
WOW!!! Are you sure you're NOT ME??? LOL. Well said, This was/is me to a tee!!!
Thanks for the eye opener.
Sandi

Maybe we are twins seperated at birth?

It's always nice to write thoughts out because I learn from them as well.

Take care!

amyg · Post by **amyg** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:36 pm

Read "The Secret". It talks about this. You can believe yourself into almost anything! I use the secret everyday and have made alot of progress with self image. One of the things I "believed" is that there WAS a painless way to lose the extra 25-25 pounds I was dragging around...and I found No S!!!

droth · Post by **droth** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:43 pm

Amyg, is "The Secret" a book or magazine? I'd be interested in reading this.

Noturningback · Post by **Noturningback** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:55 pm

droth wrote:Amyg, is "The Secret" a book or magazine? I'd be interested in reading this.

It is a book as well as a DVD. I have the DVD and it's quite inspirational. You may be able to get it out of your library/video store and I know Netflix has it. It's basically about the power of intention.

Positive thoughts bring you positive results.

droth · Post by **droth** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 7:00 pm

Thanks so much for the info, will check it out!

NaughtyLil'kiTTy · Post by **NaughtyLil'kiTTy** » Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:19 am

I'm hoping I can think myself thin, like I thought myself fat.

[/quote]

Amen to that, ladies!

I have a terrible view of myself. I'm 5'3" and weigh between 178-180 lbs.
I pick myself apart all the time. I have the worst time excepting compliments from my own husband.

spencerstacey · Post by **spencerstacey** » Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:38 am

I am the complete opposite i feel the same way about myself. i use to be really small. and now i am really big. i was like 100 pounds in like 11th grade, the reason i use 11th grade is because i was pregnant in 12th grade, i don't want to weight 100 pounds but i would like to weight like 120 which is my ideal weight.