Finally got rid of the too tight jeans! Can we say relief?

gettheweightoff · Post by **gettheweightoff** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 3:07 pm

Well I finally put my too tight jeans in the give away bag.

These particular jeans were the ones I met my husband in. They were the jeans I got back into after my first child was born - it took a year but I got back into them and for the past year I just can't get back into them and every morning I try to do them up to see if they fit and nothing. All it did was torment me and cause me anguish. These stupid $9 jeans that I bought at a thrift store 9 years ago.

What a relief this morning not to have to try and put them on. It was like when I threw out my scale and I didn't have to torture myself any longer.
I felt like something was missing this morning but it also felt good not to have to feel bad about anything if that makes sense.

I have a few more items like this to give away and then I'll have to buy a few new pieces of clothing. I haven't bought any bottoms (jeans, pants skirts etc. in years and years) hoping I would fit back into my old clothes. It's time to move on!

Blithe Morning · Post by **Blithe Morning** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 3:20 pm

Good for you! 9 years and two children! Oh my goodness, no WONDER you were miserable. The reality is that if those pants were your benchmark, I doubt you would ever get back into them, not for very long anyway.

One of the little half truths the diet industry spreads is that you can stay the same shape as you grow older.

I am here to say that you can stay the same weight. You can even stay the same size. BUT YOU DO NOT STAY THE SAME SHAPE.

You just don't, especially when you factor in childbearing. I suppose there are some who are genetically able to do it but for most us we can't; not without unreasonable amounts of exercise and diet. And that only works if you are a professional athlete or model or in some profession where you get paid to work out and look good.

At 46 I'm happier with myself physically than I think I've ever been. The booty is a little wider, the bust a little lower, but I'm healthy and dangit, I feel good. I don't look like I did 10 years ago even though I'm the same weight (and actually more muscular) but that's ok.

It's well past time for you to get new, properly fitting clothes. This is not giving in. This is growing up.

gettheweightoff · Post by **gettheweightoff** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 3:32 pm

Ok, that was a little hard to read/admit to myself but all true. I'm going to be 41 in two months and I think it is just unrealistic to try and fit into my old clothes. I just have to keep telling myself this because for years and years I just believed it was my fault I couldn't lose weight and there is something wrong with me that I can't fit into these clothes because I lost 50lbs after my first baby when I was 36 and then at 38 with my next baby I just couldn't get this weight off.

The reality is I starved myself at 1200 calories a day for months to do it and I don't want to live like that any longer for what.. a few compliments?

I know with No-S I'll lose a few lbs but I can't expect to be as small as I was even a few years ago. It's not realistic if I want to stop binge eating. When I starve myself I binge it's that simple.

I really do want to be a bit thinner at the very least, but am I just giving up by saying I can't do it at my age?

I'm conflicted about the whole thing. Dieting is all I've ever known. I don't like how I feel or look being 15lbs over my "thin years". I suppose at this point I'd be happy with a 5lb loss but even that seems impossible on NO-S. I'm really just maintaining. Do you think after a few months some weight will come off?

Too solid flesh · Post by **Too solid flesh** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 4:30 pm

gettheweightoff wrote:When I starve myself I binge it's that simple.

Me too, and it's just not worth it.

If you would otherwise be gaining weight, maintaining it is progress. It is fairly early days on NoS for you, and you may find that things change more than you imagine over time.

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 4:32 pm

gettheweightoff wrote:
The reality is I starved myself at 1200 calories a day for months to do it and I don't want to live like that any longer for what.. a few compliments?

I really do want to be a bit thinner at the very least, but am I just giving up by saying I can't do it at my age?

I'm conflicted about the whole thing. Dieting is all I've ever known. I don't like how I feel or look being 15lbs over my "thin years". I suppose at this point I'd be happy with a 5lb loss but even that seems impossible on NO-S. I'm really just maintaining. Do you think after a few months some weight will come off?

Realizing that you may never be as slim as you once were, and not being willing to "do whatever it takes" isn't giving up -- it's being realistic.

We're given all kinds of nonsense role models in regaining our figures after childbirth and as we age. Our bodies change after childbirth and as we age. You might lose the weight over time -- and you might not. Others here have.

I got to (actually, below) my pre-pregnancy weight after the birth of my second child (I was 33 at the time). But now when I look at pictures of me from that time, I look old and tired. My face looked terrible. I gained some weight and I looked much better.

By the way, at that lower-than-pre-pregnancy weight -- I couldn't fit into the jeans I wore before I got pregnant. My hips went on this expansion plan that had nothing to do with what I weighed.

Just recently I've been paying attention to women that I see -- on TV, in movies, at the store -- wherever. Those who have a little extra weight on don't look as old as those who are slimmer.

gettheweightoff · Post by **gettheweightoff** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 4:36 pm

Interesting. None of my clothes fit mostly in my waist. A lot of that has to do with having the kids I suppose and age in general.

When I was super thin as much as I liked how I looked in clothes, if I'm honest my skin was a bit loose even on my wrists and I don't have that anymore.

You ladies have given me a lot to think about and a new perspective.

I'm getting there slowly but surely. This diet head is really a hard thing to get over. Also it doesn't help when our media is so in awe of these women who lose baby weight ultra fast and fit back into their size 0's.

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 5:49 pm

gettheweightoff wrote:Also it doesn't help when our media is so in awe of these women who lose baby weight ultra fast and fit back into their size 0's.

Yea, and they're being paid multi-millions for their work and probably hundreds of thousands to nutritionists, trainers and others to do it. I'm not at all sure that what they're doing is healthy in the long run.

NoelFigart · Post by **NoelFigart** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:02 pm

Yeah, I don't like to be held up to the standard of someone whose JOB it is to look a certain way!

My JOB is to be a writer and computer instructor. It's not to be a model. Healthy is fine. Anything that requires more than 30 minutes of dedicated effort a day had better be paying off in either money or a better life for loved ones.

Blithe Morning · Post by **Blithe Morning** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:52 pm

gettheweightoff wrote:I'm conflicted about the whole thing. Dieting is all I've ever known. I don't like how I feel or look being 15lbs over my "thin years". I suppose at this point I'd be happy with a 5lb loss but even that seems impossible on NO-S. I'm really just maintaining. Do you think after a few months some weight will come off?

I think if you do No S and exercise (including weight training) a reasonable amount your weight will be what it is supposed to be for a 41 year old woman with two young children. Since I don't know what you look like I don't know that the weight you want to be at is reasonable or natural.

Do you have perfectionist tendencies, i.e. if you can't do it "right", you aren't going to do it all? If so, then you are thinking making peace with age and the reality of your body is giving in, but it's not.

In actuality, giving in is succumbing to the "why bother since I can't have/won't get (fill in the blank)" thinking so you go out and binge or stuff yourself. THAT'S giving in.

You SHOULD bother because even if you can't have/won't get X, you still can have/will get Y.

And just to be blunt, it doesn't matter if you DO attain that pre-pregnancy weight. Over the next 5 years you will see the signs of aging, regardless of the desperate measures you take to keep age at bay. When I noticed this in myself, that was a wakeup call - why WAS I working out, watching weight, etc. etc.

Well, it turned out that I decided that I want to be strong and supple and fit as I age. I don't want mobility issues to keep me from hiking and riding my bike and doing the things I can do now that some of my family obligations have lightened up. I want to have the endurance to be a productive employee, a helpful friend, an active mother (and maybe grandmother one day). I've written elsewhere about seeing a beloved female relative who in her mid-60's could not put her foot on her ankle to put on a sock she had lost that much strength. Her weight was such that bending over was difficult too. I love that woman but that is NOT what I want for my future.

Ok. Enough preaching. You get the idea. I apologize if I am coming on strong - obviously this is something I am quite passionate about. You are doing wonderfully and I think you are making tremendous progress!

gettheweightoff · Post by **gettheweightoff** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 7:07 pm

Blithe Morning I think I love you!

Your "strong" approach is helping me more than you know. That is what I need.

I'm slowly but surely getting over this stupid diet mentality. The sooner I do the absolute better. I am getting the hang of No-S. I am getting rid of my too tight clothing. I do not weigh or measure myself any more.

Now I will admit that I have fallen off the whole excercise thing. Between binge eating, drinking too much coffee which is making me very tired, recently starting back to work, and my kids draining me, the winter getting on my nerves etc. etc. I have not moved much nor have I drunk much water (that's a whole other topic).

I suppose once I get into an excercise regime and I can go more than 2 weeks without a binge a few pounds will naturally fall off which is where I am most likely supposed to be for my height, age etc.

I think I am just going to concentrate on toning up, getting more energy, getting fitter, and getting the no-s down more and living life instead of obsessing and actually losing sleep over what a loser I am because I let myself get so overweight when in reality I'm probably fine but am too busy comparing myself to 3 years ago or to others in general. I spend too much time in my head and not enough on moving.

I am very sedentary (job, home, driving everywhere etc.) so it's time for me to move for my well being because I want to play with my kids instead of wanting to sleep all the time.

The problem is if I am honest which I always am on this board, I HATE excercise! I really do. I just have to do it and suck it up.

Thanks everyone.

exdieter · Post by **exdieter** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 7:56 pm

I used to feel the same way... Here's what changed for me: I stopped exercising to lose weight/tone up, and decided to attempt to just have fun. You know how kids run and play just because they enjoy it? That's how I want to be.

So, I tried a bunch of stuff at the gym/outside of the gym, all without allowing myself to think about heart rate/calories burned/etc. And instead focusing on the questions: Is this something that would be fun if I were a little better at it? Do I hate it? Does it make me feel happier/stronger/more relaxed? Stuff I have tried includes: jazzercise, hip hop dance, pilates, yoga, weight lifting, doggie walking, spinning, water aerobics, kickboxing, treadmill, boot camp and even burlesque dance class! LOL

There were some things that I absolutely hated and will never force myself to endure: i.e. spin class. And some things that I have surprised myself by really enjoying, notably, morning walks with my dog, any dance class (even though I am known for my clutziness), strength training, and especially cardio kickboxing, which allows me to punch and kick while imagining coworkers who piss me off at work! heehee.

Anyhow, the point is to get "playtime" back in your life. When you STOP looking at exercise as something you HAVE to do that has to get your heart rate pumping to a specific percentage/where you have to be working a certain amount/and find something simply makes you feel better, it will make an enormous difference in how you feel about it.

I guess diethead has not only ruined eating for many of us, it also ruined simple enjoyment of moving our bodies. But keep your chin up -- just as you are taking back your enjoyment of food, and your wardrobe, you'll take back the simple pleasure of moving your body in a way that's fun rather than punishing.

NoSRocks · Post by **NoSRocks** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 8:12 pm

Hi Nicole! I too hate exercise , gyms etc. BORING!! The only type of exercise I can put up with/do consistently for say 3 -4 days a week is walking. I go for a walk around my neighborhood for approx. 50 mins to 1 hour and to make it a bit more interesting I take my i-pod and listen to music and/or audiobooks. With all the bad weather and stuff, unfortunately I haven't been able to get out and walk and I definitely feel more sluggish for it, which sounds like a contradiction considering I don't much care for exercise... I guess it just goes to show that habits do get ingrained into our brains after a while

I also have a treadmill which I used to use regularly during the winter months but sadly, that has fallen by the wayside recently ... but occasionally, I march in front of the tv or walk around the house, with my headphones on... just to get a bit of movement in. Overall, though I don't expect to get back into walking properly until the spring. Will it make a difference to how I feel? Perhaps not a significant amount but every little bit helps, I guess. At work, I don't get the chance to move around much or exercise even at break but I am not going to sweat the small stuff. I think sticking to No S will help and in fact, even though I said I wouldn't weigh myself, it may be interesting to see if one can lose weight on No S alone without too much emphasis on the exercise, if you're not an exercise lover I stress to add. Having said so, I just spent over 2 hours shovelling inches of snow from my drive this morning....I guess that is as good a work out as any!!

Sharpie · Post by **Sharpie** » Wed Feb 02, 2011 8:37 pm

For better or worse, I've never even BEEN a size 0. Or 2, or 4 even! I went straight to a six from little girl clothes, and a good part of that is hips. The end. Clothes should fit YOU! Not the other way around. I'm pretty sure even my bare skeleton would be a tight fit for those tiny sizes. Doesn't help that for me, half the clothes that fit the waist are too tight in the legs and the ones that fit the legs are too loose around the belly. And all of them are too long. I'd like to find some clothes that are designed to fit women rather than stick figures.

Good on you for finally tossing those old jeans! Sounds like they were causing you nothing but grief.

Blithe Morning · Post by **Blithe Morning** » Thu Feb 03, 2011 11:30 pm

exdieter wrote:I guess diethead has not only ruined eating for many of us, it also ruined simple enjoyment of moving our bodies. But keep your chin up -- just as you are taking back your enjoyment of food, and your wardrobe, you'll take back the simple pleasure of moving your body in a way that's fun rather than punishing.

Well said! That is what I mean by exercising. Movement. Not a certain number of minutes on the elliptical trainer. Not a 6AM fitness class every morning. And not necessarily hitting the weight room three times a week. Having fun and feeling good afterwards.

gettheweightoff · Post by **gettheweightoff** » Fri Feb 04, 2011 2:25 am

Just purged some more too tight clothes and it was really difficult at first because a lot of feelings and goals and sense of loss for what I used to be like was attached to them. I still have a lot more purging to do but I can only do a bit at a time.

Afterwards I did my Air Climber excercise and broke a bit of a sweat. I feel like something is changing in me and that I can actually live a better life now.