Opened my eyes.....

[gk]

I am finally, after all these years, taking my husband's advice.

He grew up without sweets and junk food in his house and has absolutely no problems avoiding the stuff. I grew up in a house with non-stop, huge supplies of sweets and junk food everywhere (however, we also had alot of healthy food, too), and I have been struggling with it all my life.

That being said, my husband often incredulously asks, "why are you raising the kids the same way you were, when you've struggled so much with it your entire adult life? Do you want them to go through this when they're older, too?"

Still being in my state of denial, I would say, "They're eating their healthy food. What's wrong with having a treat, too?" His response? "Nothing's wrong with having a treat every now and then, but they don't need one after lunch and dinner every day!!" (No S anyone???)

You see, I guess I was clinging to the comforts of my childhood and going with what I was taught...."you've done good--you deserve a treat"..."treats are so delicious--nothing wrong with having some every day, more than once a day".....etc., etc..

Surprisingly, he let it slide (grumbling all the way), probably because they do eat alot of healthy food and are very active and fit.

Well, I've finally hit a turning point in my life where I don't want to be this way anymore (major binger). I'm seriously going about changing my bad habits, and I'm ready to put some hard work into starting anew. I'm not going about it with my usual half-hearted attempt at "dieting", but looking at the whole picture (all life habits) and not just a specific diet plan.

As I look around with my newly-opened eyes, I really notice all the junk food sitting in the cabinets and how my kids graze on alot of....okay, let's just say it...crap food. I see how before they're even half finished with their lunch or supper they're thinking about and asking for their treat, not even really noticing what they're eating at the moment......all of the things I've been desperately battling with for years! It rapidly comes into focus that I'm "training" my kids the same way I was trained. I was keeping it the way that felt safe and comforting to me. If they're starting these habits at the ripe age of 10, 9, 7 and 5, what will they be like when they're teenagers....adults???

So, I'm finally putting a stop to this before it gets any worse. The treat drawer is now under an "every once in a while" rule. My grocery cart now doesn't have a "No S section" and a "kid section", it's one in the same.

Just started this.....we'll see how they take it. Hopefully over time, my kids will finish their meal and not even ask about treats, being content with a treat every once in a while with no struggles. And hopefully, those good habits will carry on into their adult years. Wow-wouldn't that be great?? Just think of all the free time they'll have not pouring over the latest diet trend or using up all their energy fighting the constant battle of food addiction!!

[NoelFigart]

Ain't nuttin' in the world that'll clean up your habits like worrying about what kind of example you're setting your children, is there?

(I had a similar revelation about 12 years ago when I taught myself to eat cooked vegetables because I wanted my kids to be veggie eaters).

[Kevin]

Sounds like a plan. And, while the kids *will* grumble at first, they are remarkably adaptable. It won't be long before they stop grumbling.

[kccc]

Good for you!! Congratulations on this break-through. You will get some "push back" from the kids, but hold tight - they'll adjust, and it will be such a gift to them in the long run.

I use the term "creating a no-S-friendly environment" to describe "clearing out the junk". It really does help when stuff is just not around to eat - anyone who WANTS it has to go to some effort to get it, and usually won't. (Simply don't replace it as it's used up, or buy better-quality stuff for a while and then gradually reduce the quantity available.)

At our house...
- We don't keep ANY chips or snack foods in the house, except for tortilla chips which I occasionally use in a meal.
- We don't buy cakes, pies, or cookies, breakfast bars, etc. (I do make home-made things on weekends. The good thing about baking is that it will "spoil" family members for more processed foods. For example, bought chocolate-chip cookies are not interesting when you're used to the real thing. And, as a compromise, we have a small basket on top of the fridge where my son's inevitable candy - from birthday parties and the like - goes, to be doled out in small portions.)

Snacks are never offered. If my son requests one, he gets fruit. If he's not hungry for an apple, he's not really hungry. (I stress that "snacks are not the same thing as treats.")

Desserts are after meals only. I do wish we didn't do them after so many of our meals, but my husband is the sticking point on that... I have managed to keep portions small. My son is 10, and I don't think he's ever had a "normal" sized candy bar in his life.

We're not "perfect," but I think we do better than most. I hope that there are some ideas you can use - if not, ignore.

[wosnes]

Ain't nuttin' in the world that'll clean up your habits like worrying about what kind of example you're setting your children, is there?

(I had a similar revelation about 12 years ago when I taught myself to eat cooked vegetables because I wanted my kids to be veggie eaters).

Reminds me of a quote from Zig Ziglar: Your children more attention pay to what you do than what you say.

[NoelFigart]

Reminds me of a quote from Zig Ziglar: Your children more attention pay to what you do than what you say.

I don't know if my father was quoting Ziglar or not, but when my son was born, he said, "Everything you DO will outshout anything you SAY."

I took it to heart.

[gk]

Ain't nuttin' in the world that'll clean up your habits like worrying about what kind of example you're setting your children, is there?

Yeah, isn't that somethin? I've noticed that before.....I won't think twice about settling for less when it comes to taking care of myself, but when the same situation is put to my kids, all of a sudden it's not good enough.

[gk]

Simply don't replace it as it's used up, or buy better-quality stuff for a while and then gradually reduce the quantity available.

At our house...
- We don't keep ANY chips or snack foods in the house, except for tortilla chips which I occasionally use in a meal.
- We don't buy cakes, pies, or cookies, breakfast bars, etc. (I do make home-made things on weekends. The good thing about baking is that it will "spoil" family members for more processed foods. For example, bought chocolate-chip cookies are not interesting when you're used to the real thing. And, as a compromise, we have a small basket on top of the fridge where my son's inevitable candy - from birthday parties and the like - goes, to be doled out in small portions.)

Snacks are never offered. If my son requests one, he gets fruit. If he's not hungry for an apple, he's not really hungry. (I stress that "snacks are not the same thing as treats.")

Desserts are after meals only. I do wish we didn't do them after so many of our meals, but my husband is the sticking point on that... I have managed to keep portions small. My son is 10, and I don't think he's ever had a "normal" sized candy bar in his life.

Thanks so much for the suggestions! I will definately try them!

[gk]

Sounds like a plan. And, while the kids *will* grumble at first, they are remarkably adaptable. It won't be long before they stop grumbling.

Yeah, I guess had my "grumbling" period, too....I guess they are entitled to a little of their own.

[r.jean]

My husband and his family are all big on sweets. Even though my husband does not have a weight problem, he still loves his sweets and they are in the house.

Sweets were a treat in our house as I was growing up. When we occasionally got soda, a bottle was split between three of us. Brach's pick a mix candies were my mom's treats, and one candy was a treat, not a whole candy bar or two.

On the other hand, we were meat and potato eaters so we could pack it in.

After I got married almost 30 years ago, I gradually developed a sweets habit that helped my weight to climb more than it might have otherwise. Since starting no S, I rarely eat sweets now, even on weekends when they are allowed. I was amazed that the craving for sweets went away so quickly and have not been an issue for me. Seconds and snacks are more likely to be my issue, but the structure of the diet has helped that.

I guess it goes to show that what you learn in childhood is ingrained into your psyche somewhere.

[vmsurbat]

Just started this.....we'll see how they take it. Hopefully over time, my kids will finish their meal and not even ask about treats, being content with a treat every once in a while with no struggles. And hopefully, those good habits will carry on into their adult years. Wow-wouldn't that be great?? Just think of all the free time they'll have not pouring over the latest diet trend or using up all their energy fighting the constant battle of food addiction!!

I started NoS when my children were teens. Like you, we ate good food, better than average with junk food and the like, but we were undisciplined in the treat department--dessert may not have happened every night, but more nights than not.

One thing I've done is to replace dessert with fruit at the end of the meal. I usually have to preslice/peel it else no one will go through the trouble of doing that themselves. It helps with the "end of the meal" ritual plus gets another serving of fruit in. Sometimes when I'm serving a "plainer" meal, I will poach fruit (or use canned--we are not food snobs) and serve it with a very lightly sweetened homemade yogurt sauce topped with a smidgen of chocolate shavings. Definitely fancy but not a "sweet". During these winter months, I often put out a small dish of dried fruits (apricots, plums, dates, figs) with a handful of almonds for "the end of the meal" ritual.

Ever since starting NoS, our fruit consumption went from once a week to every day! That was because I was no longer fooling myself that I would serve it as a healthy snack (pretzels was our snack of choice) and if I really wanted to serve it, I had to figure out a way to incorporate into our meal "habits." And I'm glad I did!

Hth,

[Blithe Morning]

Vicki, You've given me an idea. I have some oranges and apples that need eating up. Maybe I'll start preparing them as a finish to our dinner.

[oolala53]

A treat is defined as a special delight or pleasure. The frequency that people eat sweets with just seems to me not to fit that definition. How can it be special if it's several times a day? I'm not saying I've got this down. But the idea that I have to have a treat all the time just seems so obviously a cover up.

My family had stuff around, but I was the only one to go crazy with food (until my older sister retired, but she has since gone back to eating moderately.) I had a friend whose father gave her money every day after school to buy candy and she shared with me. It was one candy bar a day, but when my mother said I shouldn't be having it since I would pick at my dinner, I decided to have the candy and tuck into my meal so that she wouldn't know. We had cake after dinner and ice cream later before bed every day. Small amounts for all. No one ever sat eating a whole bag of chips or anything. But my brother is a slim sweet freak and I am an average-sized (size 12) one, though better on No S.

But I didn't really go nuts until my late teens, though I did put cocoa in my oatmeal and often make a third more frosting than got on the cake when I took over making the cake for the week. I might have developed the habit of bingeing anyway, but I do remember at 19 going on a diet, losing 10 lbs., gaining it back and then some, so that I spent my last two years of college weighing 10 lbs. more than in high school. It's been a struggle ever since. I've had some great months on No S and life a year later is definitely better, but it's still an issue. Eating is definitely a coping strategy for me, and I just have not found consistent alternatives. but I don't think a traditional diet is going to solve that, so No S it is.

didn't mean to take this over. I'm glad you're finding the will to change things at home. It's definitely better than not, but it won't necessarily protect your kids.

[gk]

One thing I've done is to replace dessert with fruit at the end of the meal.

Ever since starting NoS, our fruit consumption went from once a week to every day! That was because I was no longer fooling myself that I would serve it as a healthy snack (pretzels was our snack of choice) and if I really wanted to serve it, I had to figure out a way to incorporate into our meal "habits." And I'm glad I did!

Hth,

I've always had to eat a sweet at the end of my meal before I felt I was done eating. Since starting No S, I've found eating an orange does the trick for me. Doesn't take long for that to become what you're looking forward to instead of the treat.

When I started No S the first time around in November, I started making a huge veggie tray with 6 different veggies on it at the beginning of the week. I would set it out every night at supper. Before I started that my kids were NOT veggie eaters. Now my oldest son eats broccoli like it's popcorn, and my youngest daughter eats so much of the celery that we run out of it before the week is half gone. And she is one of my picky eaters!!!

I even enjoy my veggies more when they are nicely displayed on a tray and easy to just grab whenever, instead of having to prepare them every time. It's those little things that make all the difference sometimes, I guess.

[gk]

I'm glad you're finding the will to change things at home. It's definitely better than not, but it won't necessarily protect your kids.

Very true. I've thought about how changing things at home will help them, but it's not like they won't have it around them all the time when they're away from home. Well, hopefully it will make them at least stop and think twice about using better habits.

[Blithe Morning]

The oranges at dinner were a success. I wasn't sure DH or DS would eat them, but they did. Huzzah!

[vmsurbat]

The oranges at dinner were a success. I wasn't sure DH or DS would eat them, but they did. Huzzah!

Great! I've found the trick is doing the prep work myself--making fruit a "ready to eat" item.

We had oranges tonight after dinner as well. Mmmmm.

[Strawberry Roan]

Hey we had oranges after dinner last night as well, actually a bit later as we were watching the movie Winter's Bone. Great movie but oh so depressing.

I asked my husband if he wanted an orange, he said Sure, that sounds good. I tossed it to him and he said, I can't eat it like this

I said, Oh you big baby, give me that and I will peel it, section it and put it in a dessert bowl for you.

He just grinned and said, Thanks

I got a whole bag of oranges for $1.98 and they taste great.

[Jaxhil]

This is a great thread! Lots of inspiring ideas! I love the fruit after meals idea, and prepping it to be ready-to-eat would really make it more tempting, especially with no other "treats" like homemade cookies to fall back on!

I have some really picky eaters, though-Strawberry Roan, your DH sounds just like mine, although he has been known to cut up an apple for himself on occasion, lol! I have one son (12yrs) who eats very healthily for the most part and will actually push aside the rest of his dessert or treat when he's had enough, and his younger brother is starting to emulate him (yah!). My oldest DS (16) will eat a LOT but does eat his veggies and fruits especially, usually without too much grumbling.

My DD (7) is the pickiest one of all and will be the hardest to "break" so to speak She has a stubborn streak the size of Texas (like me, perhaps ) and will be one tough cookie (pardon the pun, hehe)!

I would like to do this, though-how great it would be if they have *good* habits ingrained as they grow instead of bad. They already don't like any cookies/desserts but homemade, and since I have always cut the sugar in recipes (usually by at least 25%) they already say store-bought cookies and sweets taste nasty and way too sweet. So that's a start, I suppose. But I know I allow them too many snacks, especially DD since she was a preemie and is very slender even now (though not unhealthily-she takes after her Daddy, I guess!).

Anyway, sorry for rambling-thanks again for all the ideas, everyone!