I having been doing nos on/off for 7 years. I have fallen off the wagon countless times (COUNTLESS). Life has been stress filled for some of that time, even though I know that is no excuse. Despite my many many slips, I have managed to lose 58 pounds. And I know that that is an accomplishment. My problem is, I have been stuck at my current weight for some time now. I know maintaining is great, but I still have a good 40 - 50 pounds to lose, and staying in place is not an option. I guess I am mad at myself for cheating, snacking, etc. so often. This is the easiest diet in the world, and still I find my emotional eating/overeating creeping in. Any words of encouragement would be great.
thanks
Needing a pep talk/positive input
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
Needing a pep talk/positive input
The destiny of nations depends on the manner in which they feed themselves. Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin
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Kittykat150
- Posts: 192
- Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2013 11:29 pm
Joasia,
NoS is a simple diet, not an easy diet. No major change is easy. And judging yourself so harshly cannot be helpful. This is the kindest way of eating to get you to your goal, if not the quickest. I am a newbie and am not speaking from any level of expertise, but I have found that I am very thoughtful about what I am feeding my body with NoS. I am really trying to allow myself pleasurable, quality eating experiences three times a day. If you are overeating due to stress and negative emotions, why not be kinder to yourself with food, instead of punishing yourself with it?
If hunger is not the problem, then food is not the answer.
I hope this helps.
Kat
NoS is a simple diet, not an easy diet. No major change is easy. And judging yourself so harshly cannot be helpful. This is the kindest way of eating to get you to your goal, if not the quickest. I am a newbie and am not speaking from any level of expertise, but I have found that I am very thoughtful about what I am feeding my body with NoS. I am really trying to allow myself pleasurable, quality eating experiences three times a day. If you are overeating due to stress and negative emotions, why not be kinder to yourself with food, instead of punishing yourself with it?
If hunger is not the problem, then food is not the answer.
I hope this helps.
Kat
"Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn." -Harriet Beecher Stowe
Congratulations on your weight loss!
From French Kids Eat Everything: Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward or a substitute for discipline.
You eat only at mealtimes. Eating between meals is for emergencies only -- like the next meal will be delayed by several hours. You will probably need to remind yourself of this numerous times. That's okay. Eventually it will become the habit.
From French Kids Eat Everything: Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward or a substitute for discipline.
You eat only at mealtimes. Eating between meals is for emergencies only -- like the next meal will be delayed by several hours. You will probably need to remind yourself of this numerous times. That's okay. Eventually it will become the habit.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
Well, you've got one incredibly positive thing going for you: you don't have to wonder if you can succeed with NoS. You already have, tremendously well! You apparently want to succeed *more*, sure, but for most people succeeding in the first place is the hard part.
One day at a time! You can do it! Rah-rah-rah! (etc.) You have failures some days? Welcome to being a human. Shake it off and keep going. You've already proven that you can do this. Just do it some more.
Play "Eye of the Tiger" as needed.
One day at a time! You can do it! Rah-rah-rah! (etc.) You have failures some days? Welcome to being a human. Shake it off and keep going. You've already proven that you can do this. Just do it some more.
Play "Eye of the Tiger" as needed.
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Nicest of the Damned
- Posts: 719
- Joined: Wed Aug 11, 2010 4:26 pm
You're better off now than you were before you started No S and lost those 58 pounds. Being 50 pounds overweight is better than being 100 pounds overweight. You do know that, on other diets, not only is it incredibly common to hit a plateau like this, it's also common to gain back the weight you have lost?
If you want to eat for emotional reasons, try asking yourself "how is this going to help?" Because it won't, and you know that. You'll feel worse after you eat, because, in addition to whatever you were feeling bad about before, now you'll also feel guilty for eating.
If you want to eat for emotional reasons, try asking yourself "how is this going to help?" Because it won't, and you know that. You'll feel worse after you eat, because, in addition to whatever you were feeling bad about before, now you'll also feel guilty for eating.
Has being mad at yourself ever actually motivated you to keep to the program?
Being shamed by others is correlated to later weight gain. Why shouldn't it work that way with ourselves?
Instead of being mad, cultivate a sense of rational benevolence towards yourself in this area. Get very clear that if you don't stop reinforcing the habit of impulse overeating, the odds of its going away on its own are very, very slim. Can you face the idea of living the rest of your life feeling vulnerable to food just about all the time? I'm trying NOT to engage a sense of morality or fear, but a calm observation of what is needed: the kindest program of all: strict moderation. Strict moderation means you don't force yourself to undereat anymore than you overeat.
Commit yourself to catching yourself when you start thinking the kinds of thoughts that lead you to eat random food on N days. What reasons does your habit give you that permit you to eat then? Those are the moments of truth. 99% of those reasons are bogus. Eat your great meals and bite the bullet, if necessary, in between.
And keep telling yourself, "It's worth it, it's worth it, it's worth it."
Being shamed by others is correlated to later weight gain. Why shouldn't it work that way with ourselves?
Instead of being mad, cultivate a sense of rational benevolence towards yourself in this area. Get very clear that if you don't stop reinforcing the habit of impulse overeating, the odds of its going away on its own are very, very slim. Can you face the idea of living the rest of your life feeling vulnerable to food just about all the time? I'm trying NOT to engage a sense of morality or fear, but a calm observation of what is needed: the kindest program of all: strict moderation. Strict moderation means you don't force yourself to undereat anymore than you overeat.
Commit yourself to catching yourself when you start thinking the kinds of thoughts that lead you to eat random food on N days. What reasons does your habit give you that permit you to eat then? Those are the moments of truth. 99% of those reasons are bogus. Eat your great meals and bite the bullet, if necessary, in between.
And keep telling yourself, "It's worth it, it's worth it, it's worth it."
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
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finallyfull
- Posts: 354
- Joined: Wed Mar 17, 2010 6:10 pm
Joasia -- your tag line is:
The destiny of nations depends on the manner in which they feed themselves. Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin.
What is your "destiny" and that of your nation? Is it the destiny of not tending important emotions? Is it the destiny of fear, non acceptance, self-punishment, guilt?
You've lost a huge amount of weight, and did it in a moderate way, while "failing" many times, as humans do. You are a winner! You have found the path, but you are being distracted by mirages of many types (the momentary comfort of recreational food, the idea that accepting your current weight is "not an option", the forgetfulness of how very important and healthy your journey has been.
Your "destiny," based on where you've come, and where you really are now, if you look at it and accept it, could be to realize you, in the present moment, are a miracle with important and fascinating things to do in this life. Drop all goals except moderation and sanity, and you are both on the path and AT the goal, because tomorrow never comes. Be here now.
Congratulations on your seven very, very, very successful years (help me out guys, this is like more successful than what? 95-97 percent of all people who have tried to lose and maintain weight loss? And all while eating three good meals a day?) Get this person a medal and a party.
Stay motivated to BE as you are, enjoy feeding your body three times a day, treating it sometimes on S days, and let that peace infuse your life.
The destiny of nations depends on the manner in which they feed themselves. Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin.
What is your "destiny" and that of your nation? Is it the destiny of not tending important emotions? Is it the destiny of fear, non acceptance, self-punishment, guilt?
You've lost a huge amount of weight, and did it in a moderate way, while "failing" many times, as humans do. You are a winner! You have found the path, but you are being distracted by mirages of many types (the momentary comfort of recreational food, the idea that accepting your current weight is "not an option", the forgetfulness of how very important and healthy your journey has been.
Your "destiny," based on where you've come, and where you really are now, if you look at it and accept it, could be to realize you, in the present moment, are a miracle with important and fascinating things to do in this life. Drop all goals except moderation and sanity, and you are both on the path and AT the goal, because tomorrow never comes. Be here now.
Congratulations on your seven very, very, very successful years (help me out guys, this is like more successful than what? 95-97 percent of all people who have tried to lose and maintain weight loss? And all while eating three good meals a day?) Get this person a medal and a party.
Stay motivated to BE as you are, enjoy feeding your body three times a day, treating it sometimes on S days, and let that peace infuse your life.
I am in a somewhat similar position. I have been doing No S for 2.5 years. I lost 45 lbs the first year and then got lazy and have not lost the remaining 25 lbs that I need to lose. I stick pretty well to the No S rules, but I need to improve my choices of food in order to lose more weight. I also need to give up the liquid calories. So...maybe we can encourage each other to get off the maintenance mode and get back to the losing mode. I have some incentive right now with a wedding coming up in January for my daughter. I would love to splurge on an expensive dress in the size I want to be!
The journey is the reward.
Maintenance is progress.
Maintenance is progress.
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Nicest of the Damned
- Posts: 719
- Joined: Wed Aug 11, 2010 4:26 pm
There is a lot of fat shaming in American culture now. To paraphrase Dr Phil, how's that working out for us? A quick look around should tell you it clearly isn't very effective at getting people to not be fat.oolala53 wrote:Has being mad at yourself ever actually motivated you to keep to the program?
Being shamed by others is correlated to later weight gain. Why shouldn't it work that way with ourselves?
Yes, I need some motivation at this point. That was my mom's tactic at getting me to lose weight: shame. and it only made me eat in secret and feel horrible about myself. so I know it doesn't work
The destiny of nations depends on the manner in which they feed themselves. Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin
Lots of good positive stuff so far. I suggest writing down a list of the most appealing thoughts and review them often for at least the first few weeks. (Sorry if I'm repeating myself.)
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
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Nicest of the Damned
- Posts: 719
- Joined: Wed Aug 11, 2010 4:26 pm
Make it harder to fail, and limit the damage if you do fail.
If at all possible, don't spend time in places where you can easily get food. Don't hang out in the kitchen. The kitchen should be a place for preparing meals, eating meals, and cleaning up after meals. Spend your non-meal time elsewhere, and don't have food in other places. If you are outside your home, don't hang out at restaurants or coffee shops. They want to sell you food. The library might be a better choice.
Don't buy big packages of food you tend to binge on. It's a lot harder psychologically to eat two small bags of chips in a sitting than it is to eat one big one. The obvious thing to do here is to only buy small packages of food you binge on. That provides some damage control if you do fail. Don't buy your sweets or snack foods at Costco or Sam's Club.
When you eat, do it sitting down, from a plate. And don't keep the package near you while you eat. You can apply these rules to eating on S days as well.
Plan treats for your S days. Plan meals you really like for times when you can have seconds. Get a special dessert (but not too much of it).
Find things to do that you enjoy but that do not involve food. They don't have to be productive or self-improving things. You can play video games, surf the Internet, or watch mindless tv, just don't eat while you do it.
Lose the shame. It isn't helping and it is making you feel bad. When you find your thoughts going there, mentally take a step back and say to yourself, "I'm doing it again." Don't try to push the shame away- that works about as well as trying not to think of a white bear. But know that your feelings of shame are thoughts. Two things about all thoughts are that they eventually go away, and they are not infallible guides to how things really are. Just because you're feeling shame does not mean you should be ashamed.
When you do fail, mark it and move on. Don't beat yourself up over it, that doesn't do any good.
If at all possible, don't spend time in places where you can easily get food. Don't hang out in the kitchen. The kitchen should be a place for preparing meals, eating meals, and cleaning up after meals. Spend your non-meal time elsewhere, and don't have food in other places. If you are outside your home, don't hang out at restaurants or coffee shops. They want to sell you food. The library might be a better choice.
Don't buy big packages of food you tend to binge on. It's a lot harder psychologically to eat two small bags of chips in a sitting than it is to eat one big one. The obvious thing to do here is to only buy small packages of food you binge on. That provides some damage control if you do fail. Don't buy your sweets or snack foods at Costco or Sam's Club.
When you eat, do it sitting down, from a plate. And don't keep the package near you while you eat. You can apply these rules to eating on S days as well.
Plan treats for your S days. Plan meals you really like for times when you can have seconds. Get a special dessert (but not too much of it).
Find things to do that you enjoy but that do not involve food. They don't have to be productive or self-improving things. You can play video games, surf the Internet, or watch mindless tv, just don't eat while you do it.
Lose the shame. It isn't helping and it is making you feel bad. When you find your thoughts going there, mentally take a step back and say to yourself, "I'm doing it again." Don't try to push the shame away- that works about as well as trying not to think of a white bear. But know that your feelings of shame are thoughts. Two things about all thoughts are that they eventually go away, and they are not infallible guides to how things really are. Just because you're feeling shame does not mean you should be ashamed.
When you do fail, mark it and move on. Don't beat yourself up over it, that doesn't do any good.