Moderate meals check in

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Mon Sep 15, 2014 12:37 am

Hi -
I'm back after really falling off the wagon. I don't know what has happened but I've completely gone back to my diet head mentality and had bingeing episodes. My binges are mainly just overeating to the point of feeling gross but they are also the result of not wanting to deal with certain emotions. I also have found myself thinking about food way too much...either eating or restricting it. I always find peace with food when I follow No S! But I've had a hard time lately getting through that first week. When nighttime hits, I just want to sit down with a cookie (or a bag of them!) I'm going to try posting because sometimes it gives me that extra motivation and accountability. I'll start my post tomorrow but wanted to at least journal a bit tonight. I also find that keeping a check-in string helps because I go back and read through what is working and what isn't!!

Any tips or support is appreciated!! I find these boards so inspirational and encouraging!!

Good luck to everyone reading.

la tortue · Post by **la tortue** » Mon Sep 15, 2014 1:52 am

I can totally relate to what you've said about thinking about food too much. It seems I can only operate in two modes--restrictive dieting or binging. Engaging in those behaviors is an effective distraction from my problems, but of course they end up causing their own set of problems so it doesn't work in the long run. When I start No S-ing there's this really uncomfortable period of having to deal with those emotions I've eaten or dieted away for so long, but I know if I can push past that things will get better.

Anyway, good luck to you. I'm looking forward to reading your posts.

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Mon Sep 15, 2014 9:21 am

Welcome back! I couldn't have done the 2 years without the check-in board!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Mon Sep 15, 2014 10:45 pm

Thanks airmail and eschano!! Today has been a good day so far. I've kept busy and made some delicious meals. Here is goes:

Monday 9/15
wt: 120.4
Breakfast: Multigrain cheerios
Lunch: Spinach salad with grapes and almonds, 3 chicken strips and POP chips
Dinner: Chicken fajitas and tortilla strips

I'm still a little hungry quite honestly! But I'm going to resist!! I'm going to try and drink a little more tonight as opposed to eating. I found these great lower calories Izze drinks that are pretty good and I'm going to have a cup of tea as well. I'm a little anxious and I find I always get anxious in the evening. I have no idea why either...my life isn't too stressful lately but I think I have a hard time relaxing and normally I use food to relax and distract but am going to give it 100% effort to change that!!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Tue Sep 16, 2014 10:49 am

I once made a list of things that relax me that are not food. It helps so much to fall back on! Taking a hot bath is one of them but there's lots. I recommend it!

aspencer27 · Post by **aspencer27** » Tue Sep 16, 2014 12:36 pm

Oh, great idea, eschano - I should try that!

Moderatemeals - how did last night go? For me, I think that sometimes I'll feel hungry after dinner just out of habit. Like last night, I know I ate more than enough to not be hungry, but right after dinner I still felt hungry. Strange. Some days are easier than others.

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Wed Sep 17, 2014 12:13 am

Tuesday, Sept 16
Wt: 118.6

Breakfast: greek yogurt with granola topping and 2 strips of bacon
Lunch: BLT with pop chips
Dinner: two tacos and chips

Today has been a great day because there have been a few emotional triggers for me and yet I have resisted the very, very strong urge to use food as a distraction.

Thanks you eschano for the list idea...I will have to try that! And thanks to aspencer27 for the comments...last night was great and I didn't have any snacks after dinner. I did have more normal anxiety level but I decided to shut down and clean my kitchen which provided enough distraction for at least one night.

I'm going to try and do the same thing tonight...fingers crossed it will work. I do find that the support on these boards is amazing and I also find that posting holds me a little more accountable.

Good luck to everyone reading!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Wed Sep 17, 2014 10:40 am

Well done on resisting! That's a major win.

I actually discussed with a friend yesterday how I think that I feel my emotions more intensely since I eat less. I think that extra layer of fat is something that actually protected me but alas not in a very healthy way. It is much better dealing with it head-on. Just know that it is normal to feel more anxious or any other emotion when losing weight. However, as your body adjusts you'll be fine! You'll find much healthier ways to deal with it or at least more useful ways - who doesn't want a clean kitchen! If it gets unbearable I suggest joining our decluttering conversation http://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic ... 343#154343 that will keep you occupied.

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Thu Sep 18, 2014 2:10 am

Thanks eschano!! I will check out the board!!

Wednesday Sept 17
wt: 117.4
Breakfast: blueberry muffin & greek yogurt and granola
Lunch: grilled chicken and salad
Dinner: turkey chili, tortilla chips and an oatmeal muffin

Great day today! I'm feeling pretty good about getting back on track. I've been focusing all my anxiety and nervous energy on cleaning my kitchen at night. Sp far, it's been helpful for me to keep busy and keep moving. I then go upstairs and watch tv to relax. I don't have any temptations to snack upstairs so that's helpful as well. Also, my lowest weight in months...not that I'm trying to lose any weight (I'm 5'5) but I'm probably most comfortable at 115 and this summer was at 122. So that's also motivating to see a positive result. Ideally, I'm going to move away from weighing myself though. But for now, it's actually reinforcing the habit that for me it's all the extra snacks and sweets that keep my weight on a higher end. I also LOVE that I haven't felt one bit deprived during my mealtime. That is so FREEING!!

good luck to all reading!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Thu Sep 18, 2014 11:03 am

Beautiful post!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 11:08 am

Thanks eschano!!

wt: 118.4 (fri's weight)
Thursday Sept 18
Breakfast: yogurt & granola and 3 strips of bacon
Lunch: BLT & Pop chips
Dinner: filet, rice, broccoli, roll and some chips
Snacking: rice chez (chocolate & rice flavored) at 10pm

Not a great day but I've decided not to classify my days as fail anymore. I'm just trying to create a habit and learn from what my triggers are! Yesterday I actually had a great day in terms of eating until right before I went to bed. I had fully cleaned my kitchen and wasn't even really that hungry but one of my boys got out the cereal for his own snack. It looked really good and I started with one bite since I'd never tried it before and truly I was exhausted and out of willpower. I grabbed a few handfuls and then decided to pour a small bowl (without milk) and just picked at that. Normally, I'd go with the 'what the hell' attitude and continue to eat and eat because I'd messed up my perfect day. But I've decided to just make notes of what doesn't work for me and try to correct it. So, my observation was that I had 3 compliant days - all of which I left my kitchen after dinner and didn't really return to it once I had it all cleaned up and shut down. I think I get really tired at night and my willpower just completely dissipates!! I am going to try and be better about leaving the kitchen and going upstairs to relax with either a book or watching tv.

I also noticed that my weight was higher this morning and I didn't sleep as well last night.

Good luck to all reading!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 11:57 am

Congratulations on not giving into the What The Hell (WTH) Effect! That's a brilliant step and probably the one thing that made me lose weight - not having no fails but containing the fails.

I also stopped classifying it as a fail. Somehow that triggered me or made me very tired of my systems. Now I focus on noticing and enjoying the positive effects of green days and funnily it's much easier.

As for willpower: oolala wrote this gem:

oolala53
Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 4780
Location: San Diego
PostPosted: Thu May 29, 2014 7:09 pm Post subject: Reply with quote
Brian Wansink reports that the average person actually has 200 food cues a day. This can mean 200 decisions a day. Reinhard and others would say that is very expensive in the use of willpower. Committing to three meals no matter what will help a person avoid a lot of those decisions. Judith Beck recommends even making a notecard that says No Choice on it that you take out and read periodically to remind yourself that you just don't give yourself a choice between meals to eat. If you don't have control over the environment, you can still use your prefrontal cortex (per Kelly McGonigal).

on this thread:http://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic ... +willpower

I think at the beginning of NoS it takes a lot more willpower NOT to make 200+decisions about food as we are used to. As time goes on and habit gets established you need less decisions, less mental energy. It's not a decision anymore, just a habit. So keep on going and your willpower will have an easier time too!

Sorry for the long post. [/quote]

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 1:09 pm

Wt : 119.2 (sat)
Friday Sept 19:
Breakfast: bacon, scrambled eggs and toast
Lunch: BLT & chips
Dinner: turkey chili, chips and muffin
Snacking after dinner was a little bit of popcorn and graham crackers

I was great up until about 8:30pm and then wanted a little snack. Good news is that it was little and it didn't lead to a binge despite the fact that I couldn't have binged on some candy we have in the house. Didn't even touch it!! I'm going to stick with Vanilla No S but I have had thoughts that having Friday and Sat as my S days would really be my first choice down the road. I always feel like a little treat on Fri & Sat whereas Sundays I don't really have that same mentality. Not sure why!

The overall good news is that despite today being an S day I don't have any urge to binge on sugary treats!! I'm going to try and stick within the framework of No S and not look as the weekends as a free for all!

Another observation is that journaling each day has helped tremendously as well as not being so hard on myself if I'm not 'perfect' one day. I have found myself less consumed with thoughts of food all week and my overall concentration in just my daily tasks has improved tremendously! I also feel better overall and don't have that bloated feeling in the morning!

Good luck to all reading and thank you so much eschano for the support!!!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 11:49 am

Monday 9/22
wt: 120.6

Breakfast: greek yogurt, granola and 1 slice of bacon
Lunch: 3 chicken strips, salad and chips
Dinner: 2 coconut chicken strips, chips/veggie straws and greek yogurt

Today was a great day. It felt good to be back on track and I didn't have any slip ups despite being up late and in the kitchen around my normal snacking hour!!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 11:22 pm

Wt: 119.6
Tuesday, Sept 23

Breakfast: Egg on 1/2 slice of toast and the other half was drizzled with honey
Lunch: BLT and Pop chips
Dinner: Lean Cuisine pizza and chips (probably too many)

I'm feeling a little anxious today for no particular reason. I'm convinced hormones are to blame for a lot of my overall anxiety. So in some ways I feel a binge coming on...is that weird to say? But, I'm going to clean my kitchen, brush my teeth and try and relax without using food. I'm satiated at this point and not stuffed which is how I should feel following dinner!!!

Good luck to all reading!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 10:40 am

I think you're dealing well with your anxiety. I have anxious periods and when I do I try to establish healthy safety valves and cleaning certainly counts. Hope your hormones balance soon!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 12:22 am

Ugh major fail today!:oops:

I'm going to just move on and try to do better yesterday without over analyzing it all. Just a moment of weakness I guess!!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 9:07 am

Happens to all of us! New in-between-meals-period, new chance

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:05 pm

Thanks eschano for the support!!

I almost didn't post today because I had a bad day yesterday! Good news is that sweets were not the offender like the previous day. Yesterday started with a chip and pretzel and then way too many of them. It wasn't a binge but just a lazy and unproductive way of dealing with some stress I had experienced in the afternoon.

The good news is that I feel more motivated than I ever have to keep getting back up after I fall down! I want to get this habit down and I'm going to continue posting until it's second nature for me.

A few new things I'm adding...
1. I must be sitting down before taking my first bite of food!!
2. No sweet coffee creamer until the weekends (I think that fuels my sugar cravings throughout the day) because it really is an 'S' for me
3. Absolutely NO WEIGHING on the scale. It's pointless for me because I want to develop habits and not lose weight.

Hoping those will help me build better habits but yet neither are too restrictive!! I'm going to track those as well as my meals on my daily post.

aspencer27 · Post by **aspencer27** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:52 pm

I thought about doing the same thing - skipping out on posting because of a major fail yesterday. I'm so glad we didn't. I feel much better about today, back on track. You have so many successful days stacked up that some fails won't derail you - keep up the great work!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Mon Sep 29, 2014 8:19 am

I'm glad you two posted. There is no reason not to - we all had fails and sometimes phases of multiple fails and often that's when advice is most needed.

Seems like you drew your own great conclusions though! No weighing rocks!

moderatemeals · Post by **moderatemeals** » Wed Oct 01, 2014 1:17 am

Thanks aspencer27 and eschano! I had a great two days so far. I decided to get an app that is going to track my habit along with a few others and it has been fun to check off my completed habit for the day. I'm also not weighing in and trying to eat one apple every day (I don't eat enough fruit) and tracking those small habits each day.

My last two days have been easier than last week and I tweaked one thing which has helped. I'm having all my meals later than usual. Usually I have breakfast at 7 or 8am and I've been waiting until between 9-10am and then having lunch at 2pm and dinner between 6-7pm. It has been working brilliantly!! I am pretty full following dinner and it seems to be helping my late night snacking. Amazing what a small tweak has made. We'll see if it continues!!

Good luck to all reading!!