I have started over here so many times I've lost count but I am finding whether I blame myself for the failure or smile about it, it is still there staring me in the face and day one is pretty much the same regardless of how I rationlize the failure. It is still day one. And for me, it is the last one.
The more I read success and failure stories here, the more I am realizing the people who are making it are the ones who have a plan for every contingency and they are the ones who make the commitment to ride out every single hunger espisode, every single stressful life situation and every single major party/holiday etc. with no excuses. They do it or they don't do it. They store up reasons why they were successful for future reference like a guidebook to success. When they fail, they don't dwell on the reasons or excuses why they failed and use them like a mantra to insure more failures in the future. They make a plan to avoid those mistakes in the future.
The people like me who give in easily when the pressure is on (and if you look around at the amount of obesity in the world, I have lots of company). have a lot of traits in common as well. When I am successful, I don't commend myself and dwell on the reasons I was successful. I think, it's about time I got it right. Why did I wait so long? I could have avoided all this pain, if I had only figured it out a long time ago. I must be a really slow learner. Or I think, "whew, I made it one more day. I wonder how long this little winning streak will last until I screw up or the world conspires against me". But oh dear, when I fail!!!! Then I can dwell on that failure for days. Not to insure it won't happen again, Oh no!! I dwell on it by getting angry with myself for being weak or failing. I punish myself for being bad by telling myself a lot of negative things about myself and then I try to stuggle on feeling like I have even less of a prayer of success because of course, look at my history so far, right? Not a good pattern, I think. By punishing myself for being bad, I am reinforcing being a weak, failure of a person and that doesn't help me improve. Also, when I make excuses for failing, it means there was an understandable reason to fail and when that situation arises again, it will be a built in failsafe reason to cave in again. So diets haven't really failed me so much as my approach to them has failed.
Based on the faithful posting of successes and failures entered by all the good people who post here, I think I like the pattern I am starting to internalize.
1) I want to start by commiting to this always and forever.
No back door escape routes like: if this doesn't work, there is always the next diet, pill, whatever. This is the place for me and I can and will do this.
2) I will internalize the good feelings I get off every successful day. I will learn from it and make a physical or mental list of the reasons why this day worked and how I overcame temptations on this ot that particular day.
3) I will accept serenely the inevitable failures that will come along and treat them like lessons to learn from. I will make a physical or mental list of what tripped me up so I can find a way to hopefully avoid that problem in the future. If the new plan doesn't work either, I will find a 3rd and 4th plan if necessary. I will try to do this in as short a period as possible to avoid obessive thinking and to avoid it becoming demoralizing.
4) I will try not to use failure as an excuse to fail again but I will try to use history of success to build the belief that success can be a pattern as well.
5) I will accept the fact that I obsess about food and eating and I will commit to finding ways to get off the gerbil wheel of this obsession. Everytime, I am focused on food and eating, I will look for some other distracting diversionary activity.
6) This one is the most important. Life is messy. There will be lots and lots of challenges in life and I can no longer try to fix them or overcome them with food bandages. Food and emotions are not compatible. Food is a physical thing. It is used for fueling the bodyand keeping it alive and healthy. It is a necessary thing like breathing and it can be enjoyable as well. Emotions, good and bad are ethereal. Dealing with them is also necessary but eating food isn't dealing. I can only change my emotional state with physical action or a change of mental attitude. I accept that a cookie won't find me friends, a bag of cheetos won't make me young again and a piece of cake won't get me a better job or improve my relationship with a coworker/friend/mate/child/my financial situation,etc. It won't make me feel better when I am sad, depressed, scared or bored. Each time I am faced with emotional termoil and I am reaching for that "whatever" to eat, I must make it habit to ask "how will this item of food help this situation? Is it a magic potion? Because if it can't help me emotionally, and it can't help more than momentarily, I must then try to seek a non food method of dealing that might actually help. In fact that search may keep me busy and actually work to keep my mind off food.
I can't wait to move on armed with this knowledge and become my own best friend in this endeavor.
Pangelsue's last Day 1 ever
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
I am watching and praying for your strength to show through. Yo uhave given me so many tools & encouragement. You tend to give more than receive!
So now I am giving to YOU. Your plan sounds magnificent and it should help get you through. Lance Armstrong said this on Oprah... Pain is temporary... quitting is FOREVER! Sometimes it IS painful; but pain breeds strength and perserverance and eventually pride.
I love you and I am here for you during your journey. We can do it together...lean on all of us. Share as you always have.
Best of luck my friend!
So now I am giving to YOU. Your plan sounds magnificent and it should help get you through. Lance Armstrong said this on Oprah... Pain is temporary... quitting is FOREVER! Sometimes it IS painful; but pain breeds strength and perserverance and eventually pride.
I love you and I am here for you during your journey. We can do it together...lean on all of us. Share as you always have.
Best of luck my friend!
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
Dear Sue,
Ditto on Gettnbusy's post. You've been so supportive to us; don't hesistate to seek support. It really sounds like your head and heart are in the right place. You're right that obsessing over failures is not good; instead, we need to make our failures work for us by learning from them and planning how to avoid them. I've done better since I've taken that approach.
I'm here for you. We can all do this together.
--H
Ditto on Gettnbusy's post. You've been so supportive to us; don't hesistate to seek support. It really sounds like your head and heart are in the right place. You're right that obsessing over failures is not good; instead, we need to make our failures work for us by learning from them and planning how to avoid them. I've done better since I've taken that approach.
I'm here for you. We can all do this together.
--H
Thanks, guys for all your support. I'm not sure I would still be here if it wasn't for all of you. The amount of time and energy you put into your posts is so incredible. Hugs to you all.
A little explanation on the "Last day 1 ever". It really only means I am done counting. I love this lifestyle and I have no intention of giving up. I am going to do the best I can each and every day. There will be some good days and some not so good days but I will still be here. I did 21days already so I know I can do it but for someone as perfectionistic as me, it is just too hard to admit failure and then let it go. So I am taking a day by day approach. Days might be great, good, OK, rough, not so great, or "really rather not think about what I ate today" kind of days. I just don't want to count anymore. I am thinking of trying Reinhard's calendar with the gummy stars for great days after the first of the year (until then, the plan is to just not gain during the holidays). Something "school girl" in that gold stars approach appeals to me. But I will have to see. The counting and keeping score thing was making me nuts. I always went overboard and felt like giving up when the number of failures started mounting. I felt like I was wearing a big F on my forehead and the more F's there were, the more like a failure I felt. My limited vision never saw the successes in the same light of reason. I'm not sure counting is the best approach for a perfectionist and also not a great approach for someone with a negative self image to overcome. I want to feel good about myself and I wasn't feeling good about me when I was counting. So, long story even longer, don't worry about me, dear friends, I am just once again tailoring the approach until I find the path that works for me.
A little explanation on the "Last day 1 ever". It really only means I am done counting. I love this lifestyle and I have no intention of giving up. I am going to do the best I can each and every day. There will be some good days and some not so good days but I will still be here. I did 21days already so I know I can do it but for someone as perfectionistic as me, it is just too hard to admit failure and then let it go. So I am taking a day by day approach. Days might be great, good, OK, rough, not so great, or "really rather not think about what I ate today" kind of days. I just don't want to count anymore. I am thinking of trying Reinhard's calendar with the gummy stars for great days after the first of the year (until then, the plan is to just not gain during the holidays). Something "school girl" in that gold stars approach appeals to me. But I will have to see. The counting and keeping score thing was making me nuts. I always went overboard and felt like giving up when the number of failures started mounting. I felt like I was wearing a big F on my forehead and the more F's there were, the more like a failure I felt. My limited vision never saw the successes in the same light of reason. I'm not sure counting is the best approach for a perfectionist and also not a great approach for someone with a negative self image to overcome. I want to feel good about myself and I wasn't feeling good about me when I was counting. So, long story even longer, don't worry about me, dear friends, I am just once again tailoring the approach until I find the path that works for me.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Excellent realizations! I've found the same thing out myself. The only thing I track now is my weight...and I dont care how long it takes me as long as when it does creep up a little bit that I recognize it and take action to make it go the other direction. There were a few times where I didnt lose a single ounce for 3 weeks straight. UGH. Talk about a perfectionists nightmare! Self doubt all over the place resulting in self defeating behaviors et al.
This is permanent for me; and it sounds like that for you too. I think that really is the best way for us to look at it.
here's to everyone!!
This is permanent for me; and it sounds like that for you too. I think that really is the best way for us to look at it.
here's to everyone!!
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
Thanks. I agree. I think we will make it in own time and our own way. We are strong and we made it this far. No gain is a start. I just knew a while back that what I was doing was not working. I will tweek until I does work. We will persevere together and reach our goals. We are No S'ers, hear us roar.
Today was OK. Vacation day with an S or two. Daughter over to watch Christmas movies. Fun.
Today was OK. Vacation day with an S or two. Daughter over to watch Christmas movies. Fun.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
The plan to hold my weight and have no seconds until January 1 is working so far. Wrong season for me to try and get more real than that and keep this more relaxed attitude toward the journey. January 1, I add no sugar. I will hold with that until it is as much a part of me as no seconds is before I move on to no snacks.
.
.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
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Kwag Myers
- Posts: 30
- Joined: Tue Dec 12, 2006 4:49 am
- Location: OKC
I'm so glad you're doing well--and seem so much more relaxed. I think you were very wise to take this in turtle steps--especially at this time of year. Every little bit forward is still taking you in the ultimate direction you want to go.
I read a book once about how people are more apt to make lasting changes when they break the new behaviors into tiny, incremental steps--it's almost as though we have to trick our brains (our inner gerbils and squirrels) into believing we're not changing a thing--oh no, we're just going along as per usual--nothing to get all riled up about...
I read a book once about how people are more apt to make lasting changes when they break the new behaviors into tiny, incremental steps--it's almost as though we have to trick our brains (our inner gerbils and squirrels) into believing we're not changing a thing--oh no, we're just going along as per usual--nothing to get all riled up about...
"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time." --James Taylor
Panglesue,
Before No-S, I was able to get rid of some of my bad habits in just the way you describe. I'd start with coffee, cut it down to zero for a couple of weeks. Stop with sugar for a couple of weeks. Give up alcohol for a couple of weeks, et voila!
But I'd always slip back, I think because I didn't have the S day relief and because I didn't have a forum like this, which really helps me so much in being consistent.
Have a good holiday,
Zoolina
Before No-S, I was able to get rid of some of my bad habits in just the way you describe. I'd start with coffee, cut it down to zero for a couple of weeks. Stop with sugar for a couple of weeks. Give up alcohol for a couple of weeks, et voila!
But I'd always slip back, I think because I didn't have the S day relief and because I didn't have a forum like this, which really helps me so much in being consistent.
Have a good holiday,
Zoolina
Doing ok. Lots of visiting and being visited. I am extremely glad I decided to wait until after the holidays to get strict again. I would not have made it and would probably have driven myself nuts worrying about it. I try to not eat too many treats and I try to alternate heavy meals with light ones. Will do ok by January 1. No loss, but hopefully no real gain outside of the usual 2-3 holiday pounds. Will work to move forward after the 1st. Happy holidays and Happy New Year to you all.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
One more party tonight and the holidays will be officially over.
OK. Here is the plan for January 1.
No seconds is a given and I have absolutely no problem with this one. Plates have been healthy and reasonable for a long time.
No sugar is a definitely achievable goal. I have done it before and can do it again. I will get focused on this one because sugar isn't good for anyone. On the weekends, I will try to keep my head on straight and be descriminative on what and how much I choose to treat myself with.
No snacking is where I lose focus most often. I am opting for offering myself the option of up to 2 snacks a day if needed. I will be prepared to make them a piece of fruit, half cup of yogurt or a small handful of nuts, couple of carrot sticks and humus. These snacks will be under 100 calories. If I don't want these snacks and only something caloric or off plan will work, then I know I am not truly hungry, just craving. Hopefully that will leave fewer options for excuses. By offering myself these loopholes when truly hungry, I think I will cut the chatter in my head. No more reasons to buy a 250 calorie bag of peanuts or cheetos because I was feeling light headed or shaky. Mornings are never a problem. It is 12:00 lunches to 7:30 suppers that are the issue.
Finally, I will try Reinhard's star on the calendar idea. I bought a large enough calendar that I can add up to 3 stars per day. One for each meal on track. Anything over 14 stars a week will be a good week. Anything between 14 and 19 will be a great week and 19-21 will be an awesome week. Anything under 14 will be examined for reasons why it happened with the hope to avoid those pitfalls in the future. No more good girl/bad girl. Just me, human girl, trying as hard as she can to find her way.
Happy new year to me and to all of you too.
OK. Here is the plan for January 1.
No seconds is a given and I have absolutely no problem with this one. Plates have been healthy and reasonable for a long time.
No sugar is a definitely achievable goal. I have done it before and can do it again. I will get focused on this one because sugar isn't good for anyone. On the weekends, I will try to keep my head on straight and be descriminative on what and how much I choose to treat myself with.
No snacking is where I lose focus most often. I am opting for offering myself the option of up to 2 snacks a day if needed. I will be prepared to make them a piece of fruit, half cup of yogurt or a small handful of nuts, couple of carrot sticks and humus. These snacks will be under 100 calories. If I don't want these snacks and only something caloric or off plan will work, then I know I am not truly hungry, just craving. Hopefully that will leave fewer options for excuses. By offering myself these loopholes when truly hungry, I think I will cut the chatter in my head. No more reasons to buy a 250 calorie bag of peanuts or cheetos because I was feeling light headed or shaky. Mornings are never a problem. It is 12:00 lunches to 7:30 suppers that are the issue.
Finally, I will try Reinhard's star on the calendar idea. I bought a large enough calendar that I can add up to 3 stars per day. One for each meal on track. Anything over 14 stars a week will be a good week. Anything between 14 and 19 will be a great week and 19-21 will be an awesome week. Anything under 14 will be examined for reasons why it happened with the hope to avoid those pitfalls in the future. No more good girl/bad girl. Just me, human girl, trying as hard as she can to find her way.
Happy new year to me and to all of you too.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
One more party tonight and the holidays will be officially over.
OK. Here is the plan for January 1.
No seconds is a given and I have absolutely no problem with this one. Plates have been healthy and reasonable for a long time.
No sugar is a definitely achievable goal. I have done it before and can do it again. I will get focused on this one because sugar isn't good for anyone. On the weekends, I will try to keep my head on straight and be descriminating on what and how much I choose to treat myself with.
No snacking is where I lose focus most often. I am opting for offering myself the option of up to 2 snacks a day if needed. I will be prepared to make them a piece of fruit, half cup of yogurt or a small handful of nuts, couple of carrot sticks and humus. These snacks will be under 100 calories. If I don't want these snacks and only something caloric or off plan will work, then I know I am not truly hungry, just craving. Hopefully that will leave fewer options for excuses. By offering myself these loopholes when truly hungry, I think I will cut the chatter in my head. No more reasons to buy a 250 calorie bag of peanuts or cheetos because I was feeling light headed or shaky. Mornings are never a problem. It is 12:00 lunches to 7:30 suppers that are the issue.
Finally, I will try Reinhard's stars on the calendar idea. I bought a large enough calendar that I can add up to 3 stars per day. One for each meal on track. There are 21 meals a week. 6 of them are on S-days. Any meal on track (S or no S) will get a star. 0-10 stars per week, I am not really trying and need to look for ways to change my head. 11-14 OK 15-19 great and 19-21 awesome. No more good girl/bad girl. Just human girl trying really hard to make it happen.
Happy new year to me and all of the awesome people on this board.
OK. Here is the plan for January 1.
No seconds is a given and I have absolutely no problem with this one. Plates have been healthy and reasonable for a long time.
No sugar is a definitely achievable goal. I have done it before and can do it again. I will get focused on this one because sugar isn't good for anyone. On the weekends, I will try to keep my head on straight and be descriminating on what and how much I choose to treat myself with.
No snacking is where I lose focus most often. I am opting for offering myself the option of up to 2 snacks a day if needed. I will be prepared to make them a piece of fruit, half cup of yogurt or a small handful of nuts, couple of carrot sticks and humus. These snacks will be under 100 calories. If I don't want these snacks and only something caloric or off plan will work, then I know I am not truly hungry, just craving. Hopefully that will leave fewer options for excuses. By offering myself these loopholes when truly hungry, I think I will cut the chatter in my head. No more reasons to buy a 250 calorie bag of peanuts or cheetos because I was feeling light headed or shaky. Mornings are never a problem. It is 12:00 lunches to 7:30 suppers that are the issue.
Finally, I will try Reinhard's stars on the calendar idea. I bought a large enough calendar that I can add up to 3 stars per day. One for each meal on track. There are 21 meals a week. 6 of them are on S-days. Any meal on track (S or no S) will get a star. 0-10 stars per week, I am not really trying and need to look for ways to change my head. 11-14 OK 15-19 great and 19-21 awesome. No more good girl/bad girl. Just human girl trying really hard to make it happen.
Happy new year to me and all of the awesome people on this board.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
January 1 3 star day. Bit of walking for exercise. 1 snack before bed. Wish I hadn't. Gave me heartburn. Will not repeat a snack at this time of day even if I am hungry. Body has shut down processing food by 8:00 and doesn't do a good job on anything after that time. It just site there making me miserable. Good discovery. Makes the decision to snack or not easier.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
January 4th and 5th were 3 star days and the 5th was an S day. Whoo Hoo for me!. Saturday was a 2 star day. We were taking done the Christmas tree decorations and grocery shopping and exchanging gifts. I did a lot of mindless grazing after lunch. Note to self, I took on too much yesterday. I was overtired and needed to rest. Could that be why I overindulged? Too tired to think straight?
20 out of 21 stars this weekend. According to my plan, awesome week.
20 out of 21 stars this weekend. According to my plan, awesome week.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Thanks, Gettnbusy. I'm trying. Today was an S day and kind of screwed up. Got up very late for me and breakfast and lunch were combined. By the time a late supper rolled around, it was too large. Again, note to self, regular meals, regular times if possible. Also overdid the cleaning and moving heavy stuff today. Really overtired, ache all over, should go to sleep but not feeling relaxed enough. Lot done this weekend but body is saying I over achieved. To that end, invited friends over for supper. Added some more work to the day but the meal and the conversation afterwards were relaxing and pleasant. Good night and a pleasant tomorrow.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Thanks Zoolina.
Week ended with 15 stars and that is borderline between "what happened" and "good week" but I am going to go into why it was so low. Had a real nasty bout of panic attacks this week. I am mostly over them but they still hit about 2-3 times a year. Researchers are slowly discovering there is something physical as well as mental that is going on with people who experience panic and that goes along with my own opinions. I am mostly a together kind of person and when these attacks hit, they are out of the blue and nasty. Then they disappear as quickly as they came. With menopause, they have gotten much, much better so they are probably also hormonal. Anyway, I will be happy with my 15 stars because they were hard earned. It was like being sick and making it through any way I could. Meals were fine and I kept the snacks minimal. It took all I had to stay at work and function. Mostly gone now so onward to a better week.
Week ended with 15 stars and that is borderline between "what happened" and "good week" but I am going to go into why it was so low. Had a real nasty bout of panic attacks this week. I am mostly over them but they still hit about 2-3 times a year. Researchers are slowly discovering there is something physical as well as mental that is going on with people who experience panic and that goes along with my own opinions. I am mostly a together kind of person and when these attacks hit, they are out of the blue and nasty. Then they disappear as quickly as they came. With menopause, they have gotten much, much better so they are probably also hormonal. Anyway, I will be happy with my 15 stars because they were hard earned. It was like being sick and making it through any way I could. Meals were fine and I kept the snacks minimal. It took all I had to stay at work and function. Mostly gone now so onward to a better week.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Your star system IS a great idea. It lets you achieve a partial victory for the day even if you slip and make a mistake. I like that idea. Sometimes I think I would have the tendency to say, "oh, I blew today so I might as well eat what I want until tomorrow!" But, with the possibility of still salvaging a couple of stars from the day I can see where it might get you back on track. Brilliant! 
Just Annie
You Can't Fail Until You Quit Trying
You Can't Fail Until You Quit Trying
Sounds like a "I dropped it" kind of week. You took responsibility, accepted the challenge and you did it. Bravo! I think the 15 stars is so radical 
(Did I date myself?!?!? LOL)
Here is to a better feeling week for you. I truly hope the panic episode is over for you. For me, I still am hanging on to a guy that gives me panic attacks because I like him so much. It's not like I'm losing myself... I just am co-dependent at times and I second guess every action of him & myself. It's a nightmare of though processes that lead me to beleive for certain that he has actualy brought another woman over to my apartment and slept with her there while my kids watched. OK, it s not that bad... but that should tell you how bad the panic attacks go. Another issue for the shrink to help me solve! EEK - and 40 is around the corner too. Sheeeshh... Imma scaaaarred
(Did I date myself?!?!? LOL)Here is to a better feeling week for you. I truly hope the panic episode is over for you. For me, I still am hanging on to a guy that gives me panic attacks because I like him so much. It's not like I'm losing myself... I just am co-dependent at times and I second guess every action of him & myself. It's a nightmare of though processes that lead me to beleive for certain that he has actualy brought another woman over to my apartment and slept with her there while my kids watched. OK, it s not that bad... but that should tell you how bad the panic attacks go. Another issue for the shrink to help me solve! EEK - and 40 is around the corner too. Sheeeshh... Imma scaaaarred
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
So far so good this week. Doing all my stars and not too hard. Seem to be in a motivated phase and will do everything to make it last. I still do 2 snacks a day but they are healthy ones. I feel better with 2 -100 calorie snacks so at least temporarily they are part of my day. The hunger is definitely less. I was in class for work all day and it was rather stressful because we couldn't get up and walk around so my anxiety acted up a bit. Also the class seems to be calculated to help us make our jobs obsolete. Not comforting. But I did resist the desserts at the provided lunch and they were from one of the best places in town. Little funny stuff today but acceptable because of the circumstances. I am doing well. Not perfect but I am happy with my progress.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
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This path is my life
- Posts: 132
- Joined: Wed Apr 26, 2006 9:04 pm
- Location: Neither here nor there
Hi Pangelsue,
It's been awhile! I've been reading through your posts and I'm not quite finished but it sounds like you've been going through a lot and I'm glad to see that you're still here and trucking through it all. I'm also happy that things are going well now. I have faith that you'll reach your goals because you've gone through so much already and you're still here! That's a success in itself, to stick to what you know if right even when everything seems to be stacked against you. Just give it time, be gentle with yourself. This is for life, just try to relax and enjoy the journey of your body and self finding its balance. You can do it!! And this board can help. Have a great day.
All the warmth,
It's been awhile! I've been reading through your posts and I'm not quite finished but it sounds like you've been going through a lot and I'm glad to see that you're still here and trucking through it all. I'm also happy that things are going well now. I have faith that you'll reach your goals because you've gone through so much already and you're still here! That's a success in itself, to stick to what you know if right even when everything seems to be stacked against you. Just give it time, be gentle with yourself. This is for life, just try to relax and enjoy the journey of your body and self finding its balance. You can do it!! And this board can help. Have a great day.
All the warmth,
"There is no such thing as a bad choice, there is only the next choice"
Thanks so much for all the great support guys. It really means a lot. It is always the spur that makes it easy to go on.
Still learning. This was a 21 star week and I lost a bit. The weekend was large though and the scale doesn't look so great today. From now on, weekend will be 2 planned excesses and they will be measured. No more open bags or packages of anything. I also throw the rest in the freezer for the next weekend but they don't stay there. My husband suggests I take one piece and toss the rest. That just seems like such a waste but he says it is also a waste of the week's worth of effort to undo it every weekend. He is right and I will do that from now on. The weekends are feeling like one long meal again and that is counter productive. Am not sticking to my exercise and meditation either and both of those things are important to the process. Will also record that here. Stars for meals and Olympic torches for exercise and meditation. See you next week.
Still learning. This was a 21 star week and I lost a bit. The weekend was large though and the scale doesn't look so great today. From now on, weekend will be 2 planned excesses and they will be measured. No more open bags or packages of anything. I also throw the rest in the freezer for the next weekend but they don't stay there. My husband suggests I take one piece and toss the rest. That just seems like such a waste but he says it is also a waste of the week's worth of effort to undo it every weekend. He is right and I will do that from now on. The weekends are feeling like one long meal again and that is counter productive. Am not sticking to my exercise and meditation either and both of those things are important to the process. Will also record that here. Stars for meals and Olympic torches for exercise and meditation. See you next week.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Your hubby is sooo right. I don't even buy anything but cheap, small versions of everything I buy. As far as snacks go, if I can't/don't eat it then I throw the rest away. It makes me struggle with my inner frugalness (I can't just THROW IT AWAY!!! ACK!!) so I dont buy the stuff instead, usually. That helps a little bit too.
I noticed you lost a bit, then didn't. That is frustrating. Happened to me last week - but it was my fault. I have a weakness for flavored popcorn nowadays. But the microwave versions create too much popcorn to eat at one sitting and don't keep well. SOoooooo now I pop the amount I want on the stove just like when I was a kid. Now there is no waste and Im not tempted to go back and finish off the rest of the bag! LOL (Which I have been prone to do)
Enjoy the rest of your week. TTFN!
I noticed you lost a bit, then didn't. That is frustrating. Happened to me last week - but it was my fault. I have a weakness for flavored popcorn nowadays. But the microwave versions create too much popcorn to eat at one sitting and don't keep well. SOoooooo now I pop the amount I want on the stove just like when I was a kid. Now there is no waste and Im not tempted to go back and finish off the rest of the bag! LOL (Which I have been prone to do)
Enjoy the rest of your week. TTFN!
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
Not a good week. The snacks and sugar are back and meals blurry. Weight is up. Many reasons and all of them are excuses. Need to regroup and I intend to take the weekend to do that. I am still very pleased with what is happening in my head. I think I know more about myself and what has brought me to this day than I ever knew before in my life and most of it is not about food or how good it is. I am being very observant of when and why I overeat. It is rarely because I am hungry and most of the time I don't even taste what I am eating. It is almost always because of an emotion. So, rearranging my food is not the problem but rearranging my head is and I am working on that. At 61, I just hope I outlive the process. LOL.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
This week very bad for me too. Unsure what happened, but the same results as you. I feel so happy this week so I'm unsure why I reacted with food. I DO feel good as you stated mostly because I HAVE THE SOLUTION HERE. And of course, wonderful people like you to learn from and with.
Here is to a better week for us both.
PS: I went up 2 pounds this week. ACK!
Here is to a better week for us both.
PS: I went up 2 pounds this week. ACK!
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
This week has been bad for me too! Maybe we all have the winter blues. I've been craving summer like crazy. Sun, (relative) freedom, ahhh.
I hate to admit this, but sometimes I go to a tanning place. I put on sunblock first, but even then the UV light makes me feel happy and relaxed.
But of course that's not a long term solution. I don't know what is. I just hate this tendency to snack when I feel bad about something. Such a masochistic response, taking it out on myself instead of treating myself nicely.
Hang in there panglesue. I know you can do it.
Zoo.
I hate to admit this, but sometimes I go to a tanning place. I put on sunblock first, but even then the UV light makes me feel happy and relaxed.
But of course that's not a long term solution. I don't know what is. I just hate this tendency to snack when I feel bad about something. Such a masochistic response, taking it out on myself instead of treating myself nicely.
Hang in there panglesue. I know you can do it.
Zoo.
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This path is my life
- Posts: 132
- Joined: Wed Apr 26, 2006 9:04 pm
- Location: Neither here nor there
Thanks everybody for your vote of confidence. I too think I wil get there. I am still lurking and learning. Still at 198. Good days, bad days and very confused days but I am happy with that and dealing. I may make it, I may not but if I do it will be real and forever or I won't do it at all. I have been having limited success this last week with a new ploy. When faced with a decision to eat something out of plan, I close my eyes and picture all things good to eat in my left hand and all my emotions and stressors in my right hand. I think about what food's purpose is. To nourish my body, to relax and enjoy, to give me stength and energy. Then I think about what is in my right hand. There are problems and issues I need to deal with or sublimate. I have to work through them and use thought and counteremotions to accomplish that. Finally I focus on how ridiculous it is to expect either one to be an answer for the other. Food can't hope to solve emotional need and emotions can't substitute for the fuel that food supplies. I am starting to get that. Not all the time, sometimes I still just shut down and eat mindlessly but I now need to shut out the voice of reason to do that. That means I am getting through. Because it is getting uncomfortable to just shut down and eat because in my inner core I know it is counterproductive and stupid. Baby steps but when I am done I will know how to walk this time ot I will die trying but there will be no more pretending to be on a diet or constant battles in my head. I want to want to be there and I want to like where I am.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
OK - so on your visualization thing.... what do you suggest when the only thing on the other side of me wanting some Sun Chips is that I love the way they taste. Like 3 year old mentality - I want it I want it I want it. I'm not stressed - I know better - I am just giving in because they taste so good. Now what do you suggest. BTW - this visualization thing is working pretty good for me (other than what I just described) so far.
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
That is one of the issues I am dealing with too. The plan at the moment is not having those things around. Linda Moran in her book on how to survive your diet says to accept the fact that greed exists and call it that. We say, "but it tastes soooo good". She suggests eating a couple and loving them but then start asking, "would eating more be greed?" If the answer is yes, practice stopping. She says it has to become habit to ask the question and really listen. So far, had minimal success with that one. Not in the house is still better. But I now do know greed exists and is a part of my life. That makes me responsible, not the wonderful chips or chocolate. It is not that they are irresistable, it is that I choose to overeat and want more pleasure than is my due. That is greed and coincidently one of the seven DEADLY sins. Hmmmmm. I need to get pleasure other ways. Then I won't need to get it from food so often. See, her book and Reinhard both make us responsible for what we choose to eat. They both give us freedom to choose whatever we like and control it. Then they give us the tools to do that. The responsibility is now ours to either do it or not. I like that and am working on making it happen.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Week at work really sucked so I am glad to report that I had a fairly good week on plan. Not one day was perfect but it was so much better than the last couple of months, I am still pleased. A week like I had would have driven me over the edge before. But I kept telling myself stress is tolerable and took time to breathe instead of mindlessly eating. Everything that happened was real and I didn't force any of it. I feel like I am moving in real time and not in panic mode. I know I will refine it until it is gold. The decisions I made to not overeat were my own and were thought out and logical. That is a first for me. Ever. They were not made because some boss in my head was guilting me into it. There was no blaming or shaming. No gerbil thoughts. Acceptance of where I am in the process. Feels good.
Bought a Omron pedometer that works if you wear it or carry it in your pocket or evem a purse. I like it. I try to add a few extra steps every day. Started out at about 2500 and today was at 5400. Progress is good.
Bought a Omron pedometer that works if you wear it or carry it in your pocket or evem a purse. I like it. I try to add a few extra steps every day. Started out at about 2500 and today was at 5400. Progress is good.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Weekly check in. Weight down .2 of a pound. Not miraculous but first time in a while it wasn't up. Really tough week at work again but had a breakthrough of sorts yesterday. Decided that I have about 1000 work days left in my life, God willing, and I can make them all miserable because of the pressure or I can try to put in my hours and overtime and just go home knowing I did the best I could. They are expecting miracles for small pay. How sad for them. I,on the other hand, along with most of my coworkers who are also overachievers, are performing miracles because we have to be who we are in spite of low pay and no praise. How great for us. So I decided to like me and tolerate them. Very tired of feeling frustrated, angry and put down. On to next week feeling like a winner.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
So now you have about 992 days left of work left, right? LOL
I don't even buy that stuff to bring into my home. Sometimes friends brign it by. Sometimes my boss has tons of crap at the office to snack on...usually the culprit.
Anyway---I'm happy to report that my scale is now going in a positive direction too instead of stedy or gaining.
I use the visualtion often. Thanks. I've actually passed it on to a few others as well. Thanks.
I finally got back down to the goal weight I reached at Christmas. So all the bad stuff I did to my mental and physical well being has been quelched. I am feeling better. As a matter of fact a cold came through our house (the boys are always bringin home runny noses don't you know?!?!) and I barely got sniffles. My better eating and excercising habits are to blame for my better health for sure! LOL
Miss you.
Take care
~Christi~
I don't even buy that stuff to bring into my home. Sometimes friends brign it by. Sometimes my boss has tons of crap at the office to snack on...usually the culprit.
Anyway---I'm happy to report that my scale is now going in a positive direction too instead of stedy or gaining.
I use the visualtion often. Thanks. I've actually passed it on to a few others as well. Thanks.
I finally got back down to the goal weight I reached at Christmas. So all the bad stuff I did to my mental and physical well being has been quelched. I am feeling better. As a matter of fact a cold came through our house (the boys are always bringin home runny noses don't you know?!?!) and I barely got sniffles. My better eating and excercising habits are to blame for my better health for sure! LOL
Miss you.
Take care
~Christi~
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
Thanks for your words to me. I must say if it weren't for you & Deb I would not have the insights I have. Others have helped too, of course. Its just that you & Deb have ALOT of insights and are very honest about your failures and the basic humanness that I need to see. You put it all out there, regardless of what someone may think, say or feel. That honesty helps me every single day. Thank you!
Much love....
~Christi~
RJ & Justin thank you too for help in giving them a healthier mommy!
Much love....
~Christi~
RJ & Justin thank you too for help in giving them a healthier mommy!
~I'm still not perfect~
~Sophie~
~Sophie~
Thank you for your honesty too. Many times when I am wavering on the edge, I get words of encouragement from you and move on.
Last week was a great week and did good for the whole week. The weekend got a little longer than planned because it began on Friday night. But all in all, I was very proud of myself.
Awful day at work. I worked about 10 hours on Saturday and really got caught up. I was actually looking forward to Monday. Well, Monday was nasty. Everything that could go wrong, did. Work all piled up again. I was going to let it roll off my back but came home and ate quite a lot. I know now it was anger and frustration. I made it worse by overeating. But I forgive myself and will move on better armed for tomorrow.
Thanks again for the encouragement.
Last week was a great week and did good for the whole week. The weekend got a little longer than planned because it began on Friday night. But all in all, I was very proud of myself.
Awful day at work. I worked about 10 hours on Saturday and really got caught up. I was actually looking forward to Monday. Well, Monday was nasty. Everything that could go wrong, did. Work all piled up again. I was going to let it roll off my back but came home and ate quite a lot. I know now it was anger and frustration. I made it worse by overeating. But I forgive myself and will move on better armed for tomorrow.
Thanks again for the encouragement.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."
Hi there
Hi Pangelsue - I just dropped in to say hi and to tell you how inspirational your posts are to me. You seem to have such a great perspective on this Board that its odd to visit your thread and read that you're struggling too. I like the star system you've set up for yourself ... I might try that myself if I ever get 21 days under my belt.
Thanks for all your great thoughts and generosity in sharing them. They are a real pleasure to read.
Thanks for all your great thoughts and generosity in sharing them. They are a real pleasure to read.
Hi Pangelsue,
Just saying hello. Sorry I haven't been able to check up on you so much lately, I've been really busy. I know how the whole work thing goes--it really can be stressful. I've just decided I don't want to continue on in my current career so it makes this time more anxious...
Anyway, keep on going.
Oh yeah, I saw you mention something like you only lost 0.2 pounds or something. I'd say try to look at trends and how you feel instead rather than just numbers. My weight can fluctuate so much from day to day--I recently thought that I didn't lose any weight, then a week later saw that I actually was six pounds lighter. I don't think I lost six pounds in a week! Anyway, try not to let the numbers discourage you too much.
Best,
H
Just saying hello. Sorry I haven't been able to check up on you so much lately, I've been really busy. I know how the whole work thing goes--it really can be stressful. I've just decided I don't want to continue on in my current career so it makes this time more anxious...
Anyway, keep on going.
Oh yeah, I saw you mention something like you only lost 0.2 pounds or something. I'd say try to look at trends and how you feel instead rather than just numbers. My weight can fluctuate so much from day to day--I recently thought that I didn't lose any weight, then a week later saw that I actually was six pounds lighter. I don't think I lost six pounds in a week! Anyway, try not to let the numbers discourage you too much.
Best,
H