all as one--commitment to change

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

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all as one--commitment to change

Post by all as one » Fri May 16, 2008 2:14 pm

ok so I've had 2 weeks of success- I'm already counting today because I'm just too happy about what I'm finding out about myself and I'm thinking a really fancy desert on a doilie (spelling?) with chocolate and maybe some icecream? Ok something about me- not too many people know this-It's been 25 years since I last made myself throw up (can't believe I said it) 25 years of either starvation, bad diet practices (habits). Met my soulmate in around 1995 through work we both had really awful marriages and found out besides the obvious we had a bunch in common. We love eachother with everything attached and un and always play or fuss fair. But still I wasn't so sure about my "image" even though he was. I just can't believe that image is attached habits so closely and that why, when, where, how much is more important than what (except sugar).
Ok so I was in Barnes and Noble on date night with hubby and I always look through the new age section for health nuts I call it and just glanced over by the diets and saw the "no s diet" just poking out at me. So I read a little and was like, this has got to be a joke, what no 1/2 cup this, gag, crap, oil, wine, no carb, high fat, glycemic load crap, atkins,south beach won't ever last me a week diet? So sceptic me buys it for fun to put me to sleep. I started it on a Tuesday and all of a sudden I realize for the love of St. Pete this is how I ate as a child before I turned 13-14 and decided I knew everything besides puking. Mom's rule was no soda in the house (milk, water and oj) finish my one plate or atleast my veggies and meat and I could go out to play or run havoc in the neighborhood. The only sweets in the house were oreo's, which around 13-14 I decided could be either breakfast, lunch or dinner. Fast food wasn't a problem before teens because if you had it (once a week on the way to the beach) you didn't get it as a snack or additional meal. No problems with weight till I knew everything. Rest assured I couldn't vomit now if I tried , I even hate doing so when I rarely have a migrain or stomach flu (every 5 years). So this no snacking has given me time to be able to listen why I eat and when, which was when I was mad, upset, uptight, nervous, etc. To know I have been neglecting my feelings about food since I got this image in my teens is freedom beyond anything I could explain. I have been studying buddism for 4 years now and initially started by accident due to a little high blood pressure 130/80ishes and was like what? So I read this book on meditation and how it can help with lowering it and now my bp was just 2 days ago after spending 30 minutes in the grocery store and seeing my 3 yr old grand daughter was 112/41! Along with all my reading and applying my "buddhawisdom" and this book (not kidding) I feel more in control. Stomach pangs don't bother me anymore I just know to look at the clock and say1 hour to go, chug a big glass of icewater time! It's so true about appetite and that it makes food taste the best (like it did when I used to smoke) and that is just awesome. Plus we could easily rename this diet to "the easiest non-diet in the world"! So to me this is not a diet it's a commitment to change or revert back to my mom's way of feeding me. That in itself is really funny because most of my adult life I really didn't think she knew too much we are almost 40 years apart. My husband and I are caretakers to my parents 83 (dad has dimentia, diabetes, anemia) and 81 (mom uses a cane a few minor health issues,just loves to hoard plastic bags, hats and paper). And we live together (hubby and I) on the 2nd floor (2 bed 1 bath) I get to do all the cooking so I get to use the kitchen. They have the rest of the house cause they can't get up the stairs! So now I have told all, you can ban me from the group as being to out there if you wish! jk happy day before s day to all!
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Post by fkwan » Fri May 16, 2008 3:19 pm

Hi, hugs here from a fellow No S Buddhist. :) Isn't it wonderful? It's enlightenment for your body. :)

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Post by all as one » Fri May 16, 2008 7:40 pm

why thank you fkwan! It's nice to be here!
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saturday begins with ???????????SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Post by all as one » Sat May 17, 2008 6:01 pm

Posted: Sat May 17, 2008 5:57 pm Post subject: Happy S Day!
now my husband knows what today is, he's so cool! Last night ate too late 8ish dinner and 2ish lunch, no snacks, no sweets, too many carbs too late at night. Hubby and I tried to cook at the park with some stupid hibachi that was gas. Ha, ha and the thingy kept blowing out cause of the wind! Ran up to Walgreens got coal and fuel used the park grill got 1/2 done with my turkey burger on multigrain bun and a city cop came around the corner and yelled at us the park is closed. I knew that was gonna happen, luckily we had the flames out with the ice from chest before he got there! Currently central Fl. is having a hard time between arsonists and no rain this season. But we were careful. Anyhoo, ate too many ww org pretzels, a huge spinach salad too. Funny I don't feel like eating sweets today? Hmmmmm................
_________________ :roll:
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found a French pastry shop! Gonna go every week, yeah, yeah,

Post by all as one » Mon May 19, 2008 4:59 pm

actually knew about this shop for years, just have not been by there. You walk in and just start to salivate. Chocolate barvaroise minature cake (split with my mom) and a cheesecake mini to dye for (son took a bite and mom had at least 3) those were my weekend s's. Didn't snack, had shrimp n pasta dinner got hives from shrimp and stomach yucko upset. Typical shellfish allergy, but doesn't happen all the time. Doing well today, so far went to starbucks got a iced green tea (added 2 packs nat. sugar) no cream.
Think I'm doing fish for lunch and salad for dinner. I love the fact that waiting makes me enjoy even better and that it isn't the end of the world and I'm not going to die of starvation by waiting till my next meal. And looking forward to a meal has taken on a very cool attitude that I don't have to think of having something yucky to eat. In the book (I'm on the last chapter) the author tells how when you eat food you actually like and control your portion you will have a much better chance with loosing weight as well as sticking to this for life. I also did some googling with no s's and other blogs from diff websites and it's great to see how this is spreading. :lol:
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success!

Post by all as one » Tue May 20, 2008 10:37 pm

walked 2 1/4 mile hike 92degrees uck and ick at the causeway shrub park- kinda cool, saw some big bird not a hawk though poss. an owl not sure if they come out during the day or not? Had my fav dinner big salad and turkey burger on wheat bun with onion! yum. :lol:
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success!

Post by all as one » Thu May 22, 2008 1:51 am

[color=green]success[/color]- :lol: took mom to Target (she had pizza hut little pizza) I went to Starbucks and got her double chocolate brownie chunk and looked and smelled oh so good cookie but I didn't have a bite! But I had my iced green tea with 2 packs natural sugar- she even saved me a slice of pizza and I said no thanks give it dad! 3 meals one plate each, no snacking and no sweets!
Not loosing weight just gaining habit this week, since my hyster-- I still get symtoms of my monthly- hopefully- we'll see next week. For right now I'm happy not depending on sugar for that mood boost and to keep eating to not crash and I like not snacking all day long- that just sucks!
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Success!

Post by all as one » Fri May 23, 2008 11:58 am

Success :lol: having great fun with this diet, not sure if I'm loosing any weight or not. Getting ready to weigh myself- So far all week no snacks, no seconds and no sweets! This post was supposed to be for Thursday, oh well my bad!
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exercise

Post by all as one » Fri May 23, 2008 12:00 pm

have walked a mile everyday this week too, the dogs made us! They watch me put dad to bed, clean the kitchen and put my shoes on and then they go nuts barking at us. It's like their telling us, "hey we wanna go for a walk" !
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ate too much

Post by all as one » Sun May 25, 2008 2:37 am

ugh! ate too much but learned one thing today, I ate a light dinner and knew it was an s but instead of stuffing food in my mouth, I actually sat down on the couch and ate it civilized. So I am learning or re-learning to eat civilized instead of a grazing farm animal! :shock: very shocking.
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success!

Post by all as one » Tue May 27, 2008 12:27 am

did not abuse todays holiday (didn't begin w/ s) plus I was bad enough Sat-Sun dropped 1 lb and a half wont weigh again till Saturday am! :lol:
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Success!

Post by all as one » Sat May 31, 2008 2:52 am

No exercise boo hoo, husband is sick sinuses again. We might get to over the weekend and start up again next week I am hoping.

Stuck to my meals had to do some virtual plating due to soup and salad not coming the same time, but I think I faired ok. Also struck me as weird to not see all of my meal in front of me????

Things that make you go hmmmmmm............................ :)
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belgium waffles------yummmmm........

Post by all as one » Sat May 31, 2008 6:39 pm

yep thats what I had for breakfast! :D don't think I can do any more sweets today except for fruit.
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sugar seems to be the culprit!

Post by all as one » Sun Jun 01, 2008 6:00 pm

When I eat snacks with sugar my tongue turns white and my stomach bulges and my fingers swell! Having a snack today I will almost bet to have to wait till Tues or Wed to be rid of the side effects. I am thinking I may have to eliminate simple sugars all together except with extreme moderation. Oh well! :roll:
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success kinda!

Post by all as one » Tue Jun 03, 2008 1:39 am

ok ate a couple fries from chick fe le- (the big ones) and were not attached to a plate- didn't fold the whole day though and blow it royally, was good the rest of the day! YEY! 8)
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success!

Post by all as one » Wed Jun 04, 2008 2:46 am

started to walk with the hubbie again! yey! And the puppies walked us too!
success :shock:
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Good News!

Post by all as one » Wed Jun 04, 2008 10:36 pm

Had my lab work done last week and the doc's office mailed my results my triglycerides are within NORMAL RANGE! It has taken me 4 years to do this!
Not sure if it's because I -take niacin & Fish oil-stopped taking birth control-only eating sweets on weekends for about 45 days now! I want to be off medicine period! YEY ME! oh yeah and SUCCESS TOO! :oops:
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Post by blueskighs » Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:30 am

that is GREAT NEWS about your triglyceride levels!

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Dun,dun,dun............doctors appt this morning!

Post by all as one » Fri Jun 06, 2008 11:40 am

thank you blueskighs! I've been asking my husband who's blood levels are normal about 500 times now, he knows how hard I have worked at this. The doctor put me on a 1,200 cal low fat low sugar diet 4 years ago and while my weight was down to 106 I had no energy (I was'nt taking supplements though or as many as I do now) and people thought I looked to thin, doc and I thought I was ok. That hardly brought them down much, my diet was absolutely no white (potatoes,rice,bread-even bananas)-Next she tried Tricor 2 yrs barely moved-finally I tried jogging 2 miles and eating somewhat healthy from summer to end of December last year and Tricor, no supplements went even higher! Almost 4 years it's taken!
Thursday SUCCESS :lol:
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Gonna be bad, bad, bad this weekend-

Post by all as one » Fri Jun 06, 2008 5:46 pm

Triglycerides- 114
Total Cholesterol-178

HDL- 61
LDL- 94
8) 8) [/b]
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Re: Gonna be bad, bad, bad this weekend-

Post by fkwan » Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:01 pm

all as one wrote:Triglycerides- 114
Total Cholesterol-178

HDL- 61
LDL- 94
8) 8) [/b]
Congratulations!!!

(((hug)))

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Post by blueskighs » Sat Jun 07, 2008 12:55 am

Almost 4 years it's taken!
that is perseverance!!!!!! WAY TO GO!

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Thanks Fkwan & Blueskighs!

Post by all as one » Sun Jun 08, 2008 1:48 pm

Friday I took an S dinner- I ate a pretty good sized calzone (almost completely) within an hour I was sick and heavy. Could hardley eat Saturday still full and did'nt even want to see bread or cheese, before I went to bed had a few doritos (too salty) and a hawaiin punch in the can (disgusting) and today I still have the aftertaste. Stepson is here must have junkfood in the house for teenager. I think I would've been happier with better choices this weekend. Don't get me wrong I was a sweet junkie with chocolate you could always tell when I had some I was instantly happy and my problems went away-I liked to eat when my parents would annoy the crap out of me nightly or have too much wine- now I don't get any enjoyment from crap snacks at all-good homemade or french pastry shop down the road is fine, but cheap crap just makes my body revolt- I am amazed how much regular sugary/crappy snacks controlled me. This is change just since no s'ing! Question for you both: When you started no s'ing did your clothes fit differently even though the scales haven't moved much? It's been very gradual but my stomach isn't as big n bloated and my badonkadonk and legs aren't so huge. Thanks again for the support, I will now lower myself back to earth! I will most likely be really good today. :lol:
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Post by blueskighs » Sun Jun 08, 2008 7:37 pm

When you started no s'ing did your clothes fit differently even though the scales haven't moved much? It's been very gradual but my stomach isn't as big n bloated and my badonkadonk and legs aren't so huge.
all as one,

one of the first things I started when nosing was that my tummy was NOT as big and bloated too!
within an hour I was sick and heavy. Could hardley eat Saturday
I had that experience last Sunday, I felt kind of awful on Monday ... weird huh?
I was a sweet junkie with chocolate you could always tell when I had some I was instantly happy and my problems went away-I liked to eat when my parents would annoy the crap out of me nightly or have too much wine
I think you summed up "emotional eating" pretty well there, BULLSEYE :D I can definitely relate ... also now as I nos my shifting palate and not enjoying MANY of the "sweets" I used to ...

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success!

Post by all as one » Tue Jun 10, 2008 1:49 am

have to remind myself that no snacking on no s days and I'm ok.
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partial success and bored yey!

Post by all as one » Wed Jun 11, 2008 5:22 pm

happy this non diet is boring-don't have to think too much- took my dad out to lunch had 1 fry and he saved me a bite of banana nut bread- not too bad just don't want to get used to SNACKING witch is my evil so I know I'll be good now- just had a lot of fun with dad at the restaurant he has dementia but was very well behaved! good day though! :lol:
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Success!

Post by all as one » Sat Jun 14, 2008 11:57 am

walked a mile with the hubby and puppies almost every night this past 7 days- ate well- yesterday was almost an s day (took dad to Olive Garden) I'm confessing I did have 1 and a half breadsticks and a couple bites of what my dad had! It was a nice afternoon and I'm not beating myself up over that one because we were kinda celebrating Fathers day early. Did one blog entry sometime this week (my other one) about taking my dad to Dustins. What was nice is even though he has his moments where he is mostly physically confined to a wheelchair and walker his eyes tell a whole different story. Dementia doesn't allow the person to be able to do 2 things at once, so you really can't carry a conversation while eating so much or walk and talk for that matter either. It's nice that I am fortunate enough to slow down and notice some things now and appreciate what I have. Actually I'm lucky to have a husband who stopped me 2x's in fact to say to me, "Be nice!" and he didn't say it too nicely either! I deserved it, my mom was rushing my dad and I interfered and told her he can't rush trying to go to the bathroom, he won't be able to go and to please be patient. My husband explained that maybe that is what she needs to do as a wife and I have no business interfering! Wow was I put in my place and I know I deserved it. I think I just get so caught up with all of dad's needs and care that I get kinda too darn defensive on his part. Oh well, learn something new everyday, thank God! :roll:
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Need to remember to eat breakfast! Weirdo!

Post by all as one » Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:34 pm

Monday-good success-hate but like getting back into swing of things, especially when I was ssoooooo bad Sunday it wasn't even funny-
Tuesday-good success- ate a few dad's fries and part of a Starbucks lite frap choco/mint too sweet threw it away (ha, ha that's a shocker never did that before!) My tongue is no longer white since starting no s'ng due to less sugar intake-good thing!
Wednesday-good success-I am not eating breakfast and it's catching up with me or I eat too late and then I try and eat late with my mom between 3-4 and then my dinner is thrown off!
Thursday- good so far- needed to eat breakfast today-ate lunch at 1:00 and no breakfast and almost passed out - ate a spinach salad with grilled ckn-eggs,chees,mushrooms and nuts 2tsp jalapeno ranch dress. 30 minutes later my blood sugar was only 64-then I had to eat some fruit so I wouldn't go to sleep (I also stirred in a few tsp van yogurt and 1 pb gran bar nat valley) now I feel a little better- bad me!
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Thursday Success!

Post by all as one » Fri Jun 20, 2008 12:47 pm

Thursday was a success. :D I NEED TO CHANGE MY CHOICES AND EAT A BIT BETTER! There I said it, It's Friday 8:45 am going to go eat breakfast now 1 slice ww toast with nat no sugar/salt added pb and fruit.
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FRESH HOMEMADE WHOLE WHEAT BREAD......mmmmmmmmm.............

Post by all as one » Sat Jun 21, 2008 10:45 pm

anyone want the recipe, very each, only a few ingredients? Fun thing was tried out my new mixer and then I got to pound the crap out of the dough! That was the most fun ever! Been in the kitchen like all day ( well a few hours) and now I'm tired! I'm adding banana and walnuts when I make it again, that was fun! :lol:
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Monday Success, Tuesday not so good!

Post by all as one » Wed Jun 25, 2008 11:50 am

Monday was good to the letter
Tuesday started good- ate my usual breakfast- lunch ok ate catfish a few bites of mashed potatoes and coleslaw most of a salad and 1 hushpuppie- came home had to bring Mom and Josh (my son) lunch was good till I saw the red velvet cake & chocolate cake I made Saturday morning. Took a bite of the red velvet, then 1/2 piece of the chocolate, then I forgot to bring my vitamins with me so then I took them the yucko fish oil and ate a few pretzels (ww honey)- one dorito then-another dorito later-dinner had a fair size portion of veggie lasagna w/ a side of carrots and dressing ok if I had stopped there- I am sensing that something is going on with me feeling a little out of control- It's funny because I didn't want to post last night I didn't see the need to I just figured, "Eh I messed up so what, boring, boring, blah blah post, blah, blah!" :roll: So a few minutes ago I decided to post blah, blah, blah, blah and realized, "Hmmmm........maybe something is going on for the last couple of weeks with this control thing?" So here I am to discuss it: 2 wks ago was Dad's day- my kids lost their dad through a horrible ordeal with his addiction to pain killers, it wasn't so bad this year (he passed 4 yrs ago) Josh turned 21 this past Sunday the 22nd and he's moving out next Wednesday so I'm prob. hiding my feelings about that somewhere. It's funny he is a really good young man: he finally got a job a few weeks ago, he wants to go back to school in the fall, he doesn't drink-smoke-do drugs (he's straightedge) and he doesn't usually give me too much of a hard time. In his birthday card I told him wow you made it to 21 and I didn't kill you! So maybe if I pay attention today what I eat, I will have time for these little demons inside my head to pop up and discuss the world with me. Wow now I sound sckitszo! Sorry about the spelling. :twisted:
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Post by blueskighs » Wed Jun 25, 2008 3:58 pm

all in one,

it is funny how these things "sneak up" on us and we are totally unaware until we are there eating ... and then when you do the detective work you find, yeah maybe ... you know it was this ... good detective work :wink:

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FAILURE! TERRIBLE AWEFUL! EMOTIONAL BINGING!

Post by all as one » Wed Jul 02, 2008 2:15 am

:x Had a little bit of a stessful day today, my husband and I bought my son a car and we traded our truck in for the bigger delux model. Anyhoo, day started out nice got out of the house with hubby went to a little town south of here started to ppwk for the car and truck went to lunch I had a great grilled grouper sandwich with lett/tom side of fries and coleslaw. Yeah the fries I know! Anyway came home my son took my mom out to lunch, was thrilled about his car and he brought her home. Five minutes later mom's dermatologist called and wanted to speak with her. Last Wednesday his office took a chunk of skin the size of a nickle and prob. the same depth too. His diagnosis was early stage melanoma. I am shocked and very sad and dumping/abusing my body more in about 5-6 hours than when I started. My husband has been wonderful aside from threatening to spank me for s'ng on a no s . This man is quite amazing trying to lift my spirits and make me laugh when I want to cry. Well enough abuse for me it's late I'm bloated and sad. Value every day. :(
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Tomorrow is another day. . .

Post by la_loser » Wed Jul 02, 2008 2:42 am

All in One,

Hang in there. I know that S days are supposed to be special as in celebratory, but my gut tells me (now that's a pretty picture) that learning about such a life-changing situation should qualify as well.

I know, I know, we have to learn to manage our stress in other ways instead of with food but even if/when you count this as a RED day, realize it's only one day. Meanwhile, you owe it to yourself and your family to be there today however you can. . .then have a solid No-S day tomorrow.

Best wishes to you and yours.

laloser

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Success!

Post by all as one » Thu Jul 03, 2008 1:40 pm

Sugar didn't win today. Even though I had spurts of sadness, we as humans have a way of suffering needlessly most of the time. My mom is 82, pretty sure she knows what melanoma is but refuses to let it get her down at least in front of me. She is stonger than I could ever think of being and tougher than Superman (even my dad well maybe). We younger folk seem to think we know everything, we read online or books, research and talk to our doctors, but the knowing comes from not worrying about tomorow and just being happy waking up today.

Thank you laloser for your kind words of encouragment.
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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Wednesday and Thursday

Post by all as one » Thu Jul 03, 2008 5:09 pm

Success- :D Hygenist at dentist said I had good hygene, I explained I don't eat sugar much anymore and my teeth are lovin' it. Ok day so far so good.
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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Post by blueskighs » Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:01 am

but the knowing comes from not worrying about tomorow and just being happy waking up today
all as one,

lots of wisdom in that,

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www.nosdiet.blogspot.com Where I blog daily about my No S journey

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Good Weekend.

Post by all as one » Mon Jul 07, 2008 2:39 pm

Ate somewhat moderate, funny thing is sweets don't do it for me anymore. If I do have sweets I can taste them the next morning, yuck. Prob. do without them sometime? Monday success so far~ Going to the healthfood store poss. later today maybe 2morrow, Mom has to go to dermatologist to get the rest of her melanoma. I need to say a prayer that he can get the rest today and that it doesn't effect her daily life too much. :P Have to stay positive and send good energy to her and her doctor.
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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ok except for plastic surgery

Post by all as one » Tue Jul 08, 2008 11:51 am

mom has to have 3 cm removed from her leg-sad day- she's scared and a little anxcious so I've attempted to either cheer her up or change the subject. :( Hate this stuff, don't mind caring for my parents but I truly hate this part, it's tearing me up. The only thing that makes me feel better is focusing on her pain and worry and attempting to end it for her. It's a buddist thing that really helps when your thinking about your own feelings and sad you think about ending others suffering and how you can make them better.
Success all day 'cept (ha) for a small DQ chocolate icecream dipped in chocolate- too bad, maybe today I'll be good~ the icecream didn't really do it, it was more like having time with my husband that did. :wink:
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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Post by blueskighs » Wed Jul 09, 2008 12:12 am

all as one

is that 3 cm of melanoma? hopefully all will go well.
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hey blueskighs.

Post by all as one » Wed Jul 09, 2008 1:00 pm

yes, they removed 1 cm now they need to do a complete circumfrance of 3 cm. under anesthesia. They are doing one skin graph from the upper thigh to replace it over the shin. We met with the plastic surgeon yesterday, and she has this suspicous thing on her face too her derm. is waiting like 2 wks.

I heard not too long ago that disease was like a gift for some people who have it, otherwise they wouldn't appreciate each moment of every day. I know she's a little scared, so mushy me has to turn on the happy for her.

How's Lola? Right now I'm sitting butt to butt with Sampson while I type and he's very happy. My mom all her life hated cats, but loves Sampson isn't that funny? :)
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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Post by blueskighs » Wed Jul 09, 2008 11:41 pm

all as one,

well hope all goes well. going under anesthesia is always scary.

Lola is doing so much better that I really can't beleive it. Today she has started going down the stairs. Anyway, nice to have Sampson so close :D That is neat that your mom likes her,

Blueskighs
www.nosdiet.blogspot.com Where I blog daily about my No S journey

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Post by blueskighs » Wed Jul 09, 2008 11:42 pm

oops,
except that is probably a him? Yah?

Sampson is a he? YEP! it is nice that your mom likes HIM!

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www.nosdiet.blogspot.com Where I blog daily about my No S journey

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success!

Post by all as one » Thu Jul 10, 2008 1:57 pm

no sugar today or yesterday, no seconds today, only 2 meals Wednesday but ate breakfast late so oh' well.

here and now is the only place we can be wherever we are.

Thanks Blueskighs for your thoughts and concern, I'm weighing the anesthesia thing around in my head. Mom wants to be "out" but after what happened to my dad with dementia/alzheimers (when he broke his hip he had to be under for surgery) I'm a little leary to say the least. :roll:

Since no'sing I'm way less anxious than I would be right now if I wasn't. I'm positive it was my adddiction to sweets. :twisted:
all I can be is me, nothing more, nothing less.

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