10 stone 12 3/4 lbs Waist 38 3/8" BMI 24, WHtR 57.3%, Body Fat 31.6% BP 114/72 pulse 50
Fasting today. Just started the 3rd page of posting daily check-ins. I make progress on this weight-loss matter, but other spheres of life are troublesome. I was going to write a little about my mood, but, it's the first entry on a new page, and I don't want something downbeat appearing as the first entry.
Graham's Daily Check In
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
10 stone 11 1/4 lb (151.25lbs), Waist 37 15/16" BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.6%, Body Fat 30.8%
Wow! great fasting week, and my mood is much better than it has been for days.
That was a tough fasting day yesterday. I ate with such restraint afterwards too!. By accident, far more cycling and walking than usual, and my post-fast meal was what I'd call virtually ideal: Chicken fillets fried with redcurrants and onion, boiled broccoli and sweetcorn (with salt and a little butter on top), with buttered home-made bread (and an instant coffee with milk and sweeteners) - then off for a 22 minute bike-ride to keep an appointment. I didn't get sluggish at all!
I was sleepy some of the time during the day, but not after my meal. I think limiting the carbs and the overall quantity of the post fast meal (and perhaps the activity immediately afterwards?) forestalled the post-fast fatigue I've sometimes been assailed by.
One notable point here - I was at SO's but I chose and cooked for myself, the food I wanted. I declined the offer of "a little bowl of soup to start" and the mountain of pasta prepared too late for me to have any without having to add to my plate a second time. The result was a meal I was far happier with. I know it's not the food she likes, nor eaten in the manner she prefers - yet it works for me.
The downside of my food preference: COST/ECOLOGICAL IMPACT. Lean chicken with fruit and vegetables costs more than a pile of pasta with whatever. It is superior in its effects on me - well-being, weight-loss - but pricey - and the ecological impact too is heavier (never mind how I feel if I dwell on the fact that a chicken's life was ended to feed me)
I don't feel that I'm necessarily going to be able to stick at this weight/waist yet, I AM feeling HUNGRY - and it's an S DAY!. Pancakes very likely.
I am in an odd place: I could be saying I have some progress to celebrate - yet, when I look at my waist, when I hold the rolls of fat round my middle, I feel I'd be such a fool to do so - it's too soon. I got so fat it will take months more of the same level of application, attention, dedication, obsession, to get to where I want to be. I wish I could celebrate, consolidate - but it just isn't time yet. Just wishing to get on with this, go faster, get there, I want to be there NOW.
I regret having let myself go so dreadfully that I could be obliged to put in so much effort just to get to this "blah" place. The best thing to say about now is that I finally have the tools to take control of this and can get to a much better state. And I might be wrong, might be speaking to soon, only time will tell, I must wait, wait, wait to find out whether my goals are attainable.
1:05pm Energy update - snacked on retrievable parts of 2 old bananas, then, after a shopping trip, orange juice with brewers yeast, 1/2lb of sausages, onion, mushrooms, apple, egg (with ketchup on the sausages) and 2 pieces of buttered toast with orange marmalade - and I'm wiped out! I feel so tired all of a sudden! In 5 minutes I'll be off out on my bike, which will probably cure me.
2:11 pm Did I say I felt tired? BP 106/60 hmm.
Wow! great fasting week, and my mood is much better than it has been for days.
That was a tough fasting day yesterday. I ate with such restraint afterwards too!. By accident, far more cycling and walking than usual, and my post-fast meal was what I'd call virtually ideal: Chicken fillets fried with redcurrants and onion, boiled broccoli and sweetcorn (with salt and a little butter on top), with buttered home-made bread (and an instant coffee with milk and sweeteners) - then off for a 22 minute bike-ride to keep an appointment. I didn't get sluggish at all!
I was sleepy some of the time during the day, but not after my meal. I think limiting the carbs and the overall quantity of the post fast meal (and perhaps the activity immediately afterwards?) forestalled the post-fast fatigue I've sometimes been assailed by.
One notable point here - I was at SO's but I chose and cooked for myself, the food I wanted. I declined the offer of "a little bowl of soup to start" and the mountain of pasta prepared too late for me to have any without having to add to my plate a second time. The result was a meal I was far happier with. I know it's not the food she likes, nor eaten in the manner she prefers - yet it works for me.
The downside of my food preference: COST/ECOLOGICAL IMPACT. Lean chicken with fruit and vegetables costs more than a pile of pasta with whatever. It is superior in its effects on me - well-being, weight-loss - but pricey - and the ecological impact too is heavier (never mind how I feel if I dwell on the fact that a chicken's life was ended to feed me)
I don't feel that I'm necessarily going to be able to stick at this weight/waist yet, I AM feeling HUNGRY - and it's an S DAY!. Pancakes very likely.
I am in an odd place: I could be saying I have some progress to celebrate - yet, when I look at my waist, when I hold the rolls of fat round my middle, I feel I'd be such a fool to do so - it's too soon. I got so fat it will take months more of the same level of application, attention, dedication, obsession, to get to where I want to be. I wish I could celebrate, consolidate - but it just isn't time yet. Just wishing to get on with this, go faster, get there, I want to be there NOW.
I regret having let myself go so dreadfully that I could be obliged to put in so much effort just to get to this "blah" place. The best thing to say about now is that I finally have the tools to take control of this and can get to a much better state. And I might be wrong, might be speaking to soon, only time will tell, I must wait, wait, wait to find out whether my goals are attainable.
1:05pm Energy update - snacked on retrievable parts of 2 old bananas, then, after a shopping trip, orange juice with brewers yeast, 1/2lb of sausages, onion, mushrooms, apple, egg (with ketchup on the sausages) and 2 pieces of buttered toast with orange marmalade - and I'm wiped out! I feel so tired all of a sudden! In 5 minutes I'll be off out on my bike, which will probably cure me.
2:11 pm Did I say I felt tired? BP 106/60 hmm.
10stone 13 3/4lbs Waist 38 1/4" BMI 24.1, WHtR 57.1% Body Fat 31% 105/67/45 or 114/71/50
Virtually all progress erased on one strange Saturday. I felt odd after yesterday's breakfast and the weakness shadowed me all day long. No proper lunch but I did snack, the evening meal was modest: soup and bread, followed by blackberries with cream - and I've gained 2 1/2lbs in a day that didn't really satisfy me: I had no "real" S day treat - a chocolate, or an ice cream, for example.
I did suspect yesterday's weight was unsustainably low, but 2 1/2lbs is more than I expected to gain. The waist size is some reassurance that not all progress has been lost. I am just 1/4lb lighter than I was last Sunday - rather a poor showing for a tiring week with 2 fasts in it.
Virtually all progress erased on one strange Saturday. I felt odd after yesterday's breakfast and the weakness shadowed me all day long. No proper lunch but I did snack, the evening meal was modest: soup and bread, followed by blackberries with cream - and I've gained 2 1/2lbs in a day that didn't really satisfy me: I had no "real" S day treat - a chocolate, or an ice cream, for example.
I did suspect yesterday's weight was unsustainably low, but 2 1/2lbs is more than I expected to gain. The waist size is some reassurance that not all progress has been lost. I am just 1/4lb lighter than I was last Sunday - rather a poor showing for a tiring week with 2 fasts in it.
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Strawberry Roan
- Posts: 1208
- Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2010 10:51 pm
Graham, a lot of your weight gain is probably salt retention - that was quite a meal you had 
Sounds like a farmer's breakfast around here.
To have literally gained 2 1/2 pounds of true weight you would have had to eaten 3500 calories times 2 1/2. That would be - let me see, 8750 calories.
I think you will find some of that weight was temporary.
I know what you mean about the low blood pressure. Mine is normally about 90 over 50 with a pulse of about 50.
To your health,
Sounds like a farmer's breakfast around here.To have literally gained 2 1/2 pounds of true weight you would have had to eaten 3500 calories times 2 1/2. That would be - let me see, 8750 calories.
I think you will find some of that weight was temporary.
I know what you mean about the low blood pressure. Mine is normally about 90 over 50 with a pulse of about 50.
To your health,
Last edited by Strawberry Roan on Tue Aug 03, 2010 4:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Berry
11 stone 2 1/2 lbs (156.5 lbs) Waist 38 7/8" BMI 24.6, WHtR 57.8%, Body Fat 31.7%
Strawberry Roan, greetings. Unfortunately, your kind words of comfort ring hollow. I have put on another 2 3/4lbs since Sunday - can all this be SALT?
I need to understand what has happened here, it seems outrageous. What kind of weight can it be if I gain 5 1/4lbs in 2 days?
The Saturday giant breakfast and subsequent intake is already documented, but here, as well as I can recall it, is how Sunday's eating went:
Modest breakfast: 2 sausages with 1/2 an onion - then I made a batch of pancake batter (4 1/2oz flour, 12 fl oz milk, I large egg, a little salt) which I converted into pancakes over the next 6 hours (no lemons, so each was topped with a little butter and maple syrup). No formal lunch as such. At 4:30 I was at a child's birthday party - I shared 2 pieces of cake with SO - I had the strawberry, she had the chocolate. They were delicious, and rich, but only 2 half pieces. And a glass of cava, and a Pimms. Then a bowl of nibbles appeared - all sorts of flavoured starchy deep-fried MSG loaded delights - I grazed, with moderate pleasure and no attempt to hold myself in check. Finally, around 8:30pm, an evening meal, boiled new potatoes with melted butter, leaf-beet and 2 fried quorn sausages, with blackberries and yoghourt for dessert.
So, yes, it was S day eating - but "Wild"? Hardly. I don't understand my own situation - I feel like I don't deserve this massive set-back. I must somehow not have a proper grasp of reality where my own body and eating and limitations are concerned.
All this happened without me eating a single piece of candy - no chocolates, no fizzy sugary nonsense, no ice-cream - it hardly seemed like S days at all (apart from the snacks and cakes) Oh, I missed something - no lunch Saturday - but I did have 3 pieces of carrot cake with icing - it said "90 calories a slice" and I eat 3 - it was really delicious.
I thought, so long as I avoided sheer gluttony (and Saturday breakfast came close!) that I wouldn't see much weight-gain on a weekend if I wasn't "naughty" - but I got it wrong this weekend. Maybe the large weight-loss was misleading, and I got slack because I thought I had leeway and I didn't?
If I had FELT myself greedily eating to excess (yes, Saturday breakfast, yes, 3 slices of carrot cake - but that's it!) then I could identify a cause I could believe in - but with those 2 episodes aside, I just didn't see this coming.
Strawberry Roan, greetings. Unfortunately, your kind words of comfort ring hollow. I have put on another 2 3/4lbs since Sunday - can all this be SALT?
I need to understand what has happened here, it seems outrageous. What kind of weight can it be if I gain 5 1/4lbs in 2 days?
The Saturday giant breakfast and subsequent intake is already documented, but here, as well as I can recall it, is how Sunday's eating went:
Modest breakfast: 2 sausages with 1/2 an onion - then I made a batch of pancake batter (4 1/2oz flour, 12 fl oz milk, I large egg, a little salt) which I converted into pancakes over the next 6 hours (no lemons, so each was topped with a little butter and maple syrup). No formal lunch as such. At 4:30 I was at a child's birthday party - I shared 2 pieces of cake with SO - I had the strawberry, she had the chocolate. They were delicious, and rich, but only 2 half pieces. And a glass of cava, and a Pimms. Then a bowl of nibbles appeared - all sorts of flavoured starchy deep-fried MSG loaded delights - I grazed, with moderate pleasure and no attempt to hold myself in check. Finally, around 8:30pm, an evening meal, boiled new potatoes with melted butter, leaf-beet and 2 fried quorn sausages, with blackberries and yoghourt for dessert.
So, yes, it was S day eating - but "Wild"? Hardly. I don't understand my own situation - I feel like I don't deserve this massive set-back. I must somehow not have a proper grasp of reality where my own body and eating and limitations are concerned.
All this happened without me eating a single piece of candy - no chocolates, no fizzy sugary nonsense, no ice-cream - it hardly seemed like S days at all (apart from the snacks and cakes) Oh, I missed something - no lunch Saturday - but I did have 3 pieces of carrot cake with icing - it said "90 calories a slice" and I eat 3 - it was really delicious.
I thought, so long as I avoided sheer gluttony (and Saturday breakfast came close!) that I wouldn't see much weight-gain on a weekend if I wasn't "naughty" - but I got it wrong this weekend. Maybe the large weight-loss was misleading, and I got slack because I thought I had leeway and I didn't?
If I had FELT myself greedily eating to excess (yes, Saturday breakfast, yes, 3 slices of carrot cake - but that's it!) then I could identify a cause I could believe in - but with those 2 episodes aside, I just didn't see this coming.
Time will tell. . .
Graham,
It's way too early to panic about this so called "weight-gain." As you will hear from lots of people on these boards, scales are not only the best indicator of your success. More than likely that will level off in a couple of days. It's better to look for how your clothes are fitting, are you able to move your belt in a little tighter, do your jeans feel a little looser. . . over time.
Also, I remember you have been experimenting with some "fasting"-a modification that is clearly not a feature of No S. Anytime you throw your body into "starvation" mode, that will physiologically change the way you react. I'm sure there is some sort of science that supports that (I haven't kept up with that research) but it occurs to me that your body may be experiencing some "confusion." Your innards may be saying, "Hey how come sometimes I have to go without food for hours and sometimes I finally get to have some sugar and other stuff-I just don't know what to make of this." This is just a thought based on years of reading about what extreme dieting will do. And maybe one day a week or whatever would not fall into that category-again, I'm not familiar with it-this is just a perspective from someone who believes in the "slow and steady wins the race" philosophy. And to all of those who are doing that fasting thing--I'm not judging, just observing!
I remember a health expert who used to call the pounds you're concerned about "fluff weight" that will not necessarily "stick." Now if it's still "stuck" to your bones after a week or two, that might be a different story. In any case, don't let this derail you. Stick to the plan, keep your habits going and you will find success. . . as the tortoise, not the hare!
It's way too early to panic about this so called "weight-gain." As you will hear from lots of people on these boards, scales are not only the best indicator of your success. More than likely that will level off in a couple of days. It's better to look for how your clothes are fitting, are you able to move your belt in a little tighter, do your jeans feel a little looser. . . over time.
Also, I remember you have been experimenting with some "fasting"-a modification that is clearly not a feature of No S. Anytime you throw your body into "starvation" mode, that will physiologically change the way you react. I'm sure there is some sort of science that supports that (I haven't kept up with that research) but it occurs to me that your body may be experiencing some "confusion." Your innards may be saying, "Hey how come sometimes I have to go without food for hours and sometimes I finally get to have some sugar and other stuff-I just don't know what to make of this." This is just a thought based on years of reading about what extreme dieting will do. And maybe one day a week or whatever would not fall into that category-again, I'm not familiar with it-this is just a perspective from someone who believes in the "slow and steady wins the race" philosophy. And to all of those who are doing that fasting thing--I'm not judging, just observing!
I remember a health expert who used to call the pounds you're concerned about "fluff weight" that will not necessarily "stick." Now if it's still "stuck" to your bones after a week or two, that might be a different story. In any case, don't let this derail you. Stick to the plan, keep your habits going and you will find success. . . as the tortoise, not the hare!
LA Loser. . . well on my way to becoming an LA Winner.
Graham,Graham wrote: I am in an odd place: I could be saying I have some progress to celebrate - yet, when I look at my waist, when I hold the rolls of fat round my middle, I feel I'd be such a fool to do so - it's too soon. I got so fat it will take months more of the same level of application, attention, dedication, obsession, to get to where I want to be. I wish I could celebrate, consolidate - but it just isn't time yet. Just wishing to get on with this, go faster, get there, I want to be there NOW.
I already responded on the weight bump on the main thread, but this caught my eye when I was looking for your menu.
It has the same tone as that old corporate joke that "the beatings will continue until morale improves"! You are NOT a fool to celerate progress - ALL progress, no matter how tiny and in what form! When a child is learning to bicycle, do we wait until he/she can ride down the block before applauding? No, we encourage every bit of the way, even if they just TRY.
So pat yourself on the back every time the scale drops and (more importantly, IMHO), every time you stay on habit, especially when it's a challenge. As counter-intuitive as it sounds, you'll make better progress being kind to yourself than you will being harsh.
It took a while to get where you are. It will take a while to get back. Being impatient won't make it faster, it will just make you more unhappy in the journey. Celebrate that you have chosen to reclaim your fitness, and appreciate what a nice thing you are doing for yourself each day.
Best wishes,
KCCC
11 stone 0 3/4 lbs, Waist 38 1/2"
Thanks for the encouragement and reassurance LA Loser and KCCC ("the beatings will continue until morale improves" - loved it!) I will keep sticking to my current strategy, though I was thinking of one small modification: if I again see a large weight or waist gain on a Sunday morning, I might choose to treat Sunday more like an N-day than an S-day.
@LA_Loser: I have been doing 2 days a week fasting in conjunction with No S for 2 1/2 months now, and I was tracking my weight/waist for a month before that on regular No S, so I am quite familiar with my usual range of variability. The reason I was so bothered by this weekend's weight & waist gain was it was nearly double what I have seen before over a weekend.
@KCCC: yes, I am sure you are right, the carrot is mightier than the stick - but my age and health-history and frustration in other areas of life all give a sharp sense of urgency to getting this particular job done quickly. I can just about stand how slow it goes, but the inexplicable setbacks drive me nuts.
The support is appreciated.
Thanks for the encouragement and reassurance LA Loser and KCCC ("the beatings will continue until morale improves" - loved it!) I will keep sticking to my current strategy, though I was thinking of one small modification: if I again see a large weight or waist gain on a Sunday morning, I might choose to treat Sunday more like an N-day than an S-day.
@LA_Loser: I have been doing 2 days a week fasting in conjunction with No S for 2 1/2 months now, and I was tracking my weight/waist for a month before that on regular No S, so I am quite familiar with my usual range of variability. The reason I was so bothered by this weekend's weight & waist gain was it was nearly double what I have seen before over a weekend.
@KCCC: yes, I am sure you are right, the carrot is mightier than the stick - but my age and health-history and frustration in other areas of life all give a sharp sense of urgency to getting this particular job done quickly. I can just about stand how slow it goes, but the inexplicable setbacks drive me nuts.
The support is appreciated.
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Strawberry Roan
- Posts: 1208
- Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2010 10:51 pm
Graham,
Thanks for the welcome, let me say how much I enjoy reading your posts - you take me right to the English countryside. Love reading about the different terms for food, etc.
All I can say is Stay the Course - You Can't Go Wrong If You Are Doing Right - and all those other platitudes.
It is easy to get discouraged but I just keep on the straight and narrow. I was very successful on NO S last year (too successful, got too thin and ate to compensate but forgot to stop
) I am now back and in a much better frame of mind.
My body tends to hold on to a certain weight - a set point of sorts - then will finally bulge after a few days (or a couple of weeks). Then it will reset at the lower weight. I only have a few pounds to lose so that is always difficult as our bodies (women's in particular) hold on to that last layer of fat as protection of the species in the event of a famine. Women in the olden times needed the extra fat store in the event of a pregnancy, the baby would be less likely to suffer starvation. But I don't think you (nor I) need to worry about that, now do we?
Although I have always been a scale watcher (weigh each morning and each night) - other guidelines like clothes and how the body looks unclothed are better indicators of success, in my very humble opinion.
Hang tough,
Thanks for the welcome, let me say how much I enjoy reading your posts - you take me right to the English countryside. Love reading about the different terms for food, etc.
All I can say is Stay the Course - You Can't Go Wrong If You Are Doing Right - and all those other platitudes.
It is easy to get discouraged but I just keep on the straight and narrow. I was very successful on NO S last year (too successful, got too thin and ate to compensate but forgot to stop
) I am now back and in a much better frame of mind.My body tends to hold on to a certain weight - a set point of sorts - then will finally bulge after a few days (or a couple of weeks). Then it will reset at the lower weight. I only have a few pounds to lose so that is always difficult as our bodies (women's in particular) hold on to that last layer of fat as protection of the species in the event of a famine. Women in the olden times needed the extra fat store in the event of a pregnancy, the baby would be less likely to suffer starvation. But I don't think you (nor I) need to worry about that, now do we?
Although I have always been a scale watcher (weigh each morning and each night) - other guidelines like clothes and how the body looks unclothed are better indicators of success, in my very humble opinion.
Hang tough,
Berry
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Strawberry Roan
- Posts: 1208
- Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2010 10:51 pm
10stone 12lbs, Waist 38 1/4", BMI 23.9, WHtR 57.1%, Body Fat 31.5%
A day of hurry and pressure forced me to eat less than I wanted to, I was hungry a good part of the day, here are good numbers, but with a sense of slight strain and wondering if they can endure.
A slimmer waist makes yoga easier. I see slim people in the street and I don't envy or hate them, I feel like I identify with them, it's just a matter of time.
Strangely enough, given my hideous waistline, I am already in a minority in the UK, as 2/3rds of the population are reportedly either overweight or obese = BMI >25. In my opinion, that just shows how misleading the BMI is. The research points to waistline as being the more useful, reliable indicator of health risks.
At my height, a waistline of <36" would be the minimum desirable, 33 1/2" "safe" (statistically speaking), something around 30" would approach ideal. That seems such a long way off! I feel quite daunted. I have had trouble getting this far, I have got 2 1/4" off my waist so far, it has taken nearly 3 months - so, will it take me another 3 months just to get to <36"?
I just went off and did a google search on % of UK population overweight or obese - seems to depend on which website you go to, but the figure of 2/5 are overweight, a further 1/5 are obese is found on websites such as "patient UK" - a resource provided by a couple of UK GP's based in the north of England. I'm hoping they are trustworthy.
A funny thing about clothes sizes - I'm now able to comfortably wear a pair of blue trousers that haven't fit me since a year ago when I was "rowing" (Concept2 rowing machine) a lot - but the label says 34" - and I measure 38 14" - just how far off are these manufacturers prepared to be to flatter and please us?
If today's weight is "genuine", then I might expect to weigh only 10 stone 9lbs in another 3 weeks. At that point, I would have shed 10% of my starting weight. Two years ago, when I joined Weight Watchers, I was weighed at 12stone 6lbs, but that was clothed - trousers, t-shirt, socks - so I am already more than 10% lower than that.
Maybe I'll buy a new pair of black jeans this week. Not fancy ones - but fitting my new waistline? Why not? A little celebration, as KCCC suggests.
11:47pm Maybe too soon to get new jeans, the current ones aren't that loose. felt hungry again some of the time today, tomorrow I'll be fasting. I need to get food shopping organised too: I'm buying too much and wasting stuff because of fasting or eating away from home.
A day of hurry and pressure forced me to eat less than I wanted to, I was hungry a good part of the day, here are good numbers, but with a sense of slight strain and wondering if they can endure.
A slimmer waist makes yoga easier. I see slim people in the street and I don't envy or hate them, I feel like I identify with them, it's just a matter of time.
Strangely enough, given my hideous waistline, I am already in a minority in the UK, as 2/3rds of the population are reportedly either overweight or obese = BMI >25. In my opinion, that just shows how misleading the BMI is. The research points to waistline as being the more useful, reliable indicator of health risks.
At my height, a waistline of <36" would be the minimum desirable, 33 1/2" "safe" (statistically speaking), something around 30" would approach ideal. That seems such a long way off! I feel quite daunted. I have had trouble getting this far, I have got 2 1/4" off my waist so far, it has taken nearly 3 months - so, will it take me another 3 months just to get to <36"?
I just went off and did a google search on % of UK population overweight or obese - seems to depend on which website you go to, but the figure of 2/5 are overweight, a further 1/5 are obese is found on websites such as "patient UK" - a resource provided by a couple of UK GP's based in the north of England. I'm hoping they are trustworthy.
A funny thing about clothes sizes - I'm now able to comfortably wear a pair of blue trousers that haven't fit me since a year ago when I was "rowing" (Concept2 rowing machine) a lot - but the label says 34" - and I measure 38 14" - just how far off are these manufacturers prepared to be to flatter and please us?
If today's weight is "genuine", then I might expect to weigh only 10 stone 9lbs in another 3 weeks. At that point, I would have shed 10% of my starting weight. Two years ago, when I joined Weight Watchers, I was weighed at 12stone 6lbs, but that was clothed - trousers, t-shirt, socks - so I am already more than 10% lower than that.
Maybe I'll buy a new pair of black jeans this week. Not fancy ones - but fitting my new waistline? Why not? A little celebration, as KCCC suggests.
11:47pm Maybe too soon to get new jeans, the current ones aren't that loose. felt hungry again some of the time today, tomorrow I'll be fasting. I need to get food shopping organised too: I'm buying too much and wasting stuff because of fasting or eating away from home.
10stone 12 1/4lbs, 38 1/4", BMI 23.9, WHtR 57.1%, Body Fat 31.4%
Slight regain - but I had problems getting a good lunch and ate with today's fast in mind last night after a show, late but with protein and vitamins aplenty. I don't want to have a hard time today. No big goal either, calm about it - anxiety provokes reaction and excess.
Just noticed: I'm 1/2lb lighter and 1/8" slimmer than I was last Friday, despite all the drama in between! (and the weight didn't just "fall off me" - I had to suffer a bit for that!)
10:52 pm Fast over, meal eaten, and a whole week of green days. I skim other people's check-in's and I'm glad I have my problems, not anyone else's.
Slight regain - but I had problems getting a good lunch and ate with today's fast in mind last night after a show, late but with protein and vitamins aplenty. I don't want to have a hard time today. No big goal either, calm about it - anxiety provokes reaction and excess.
Just noticed: I'm 1/2lb lighter and 1/8" slimmer than I was last Friday, despite all the drama in between! (and the weight didn't just "fall off me" - I had to suffer a bit for that!)
10:52 pm Fast over, meal eaten, and a whole week of green days. I skim other people's check-in's and I'm glad I have my problems, not anyone else's.
10stone 11 3/4 lbs, Waist 38", BMI 23.8, WHtR 56.7%, Body Fat 30.9% ..... Biceps BP 111/76 pulse 48 or: wrist 110/77 pulse 46 (heavens! the wrist and biceps monitors actually agree for once!)
Modest loss, I'm slightly heavier and fatter than last Saturday, but I don't feel needy or desperate, I don't feel the need of the size of breakfast I tucked into then. I do intend to eat PANCAKES - it's an S DAY! Yay!
I also feel pudgy and bloated and impatient - and with a desire to exercise! I'm seriously feeling like I want to do something that requires my Abs to get involved (cycling is pretty useless for that) - maybe some time on my rower?
Well, let's see. First, meditation, then breakfast - an allotment trip is also likely, so maybe I'll save my strength till I get the day's activities mapped out.
And a question: why don't I want to spend any time practising Yoga? I am oddly reluctant. What's the problem, I wonder?
Modest loss, I'm slightly heavier and fatter than last Saturday, but I don't feel needy or desperate, I don't feel the need of the size of breakfast I tucked into then. I do intend to eat PANCAKES - it's an S DAY! Yay!
I also feel pudgy and bloated and impatient - and with a desire to exercise! I'm seriously feeling like I want to do something that requires my Abs to get involved (cycling is pretty useless for that) - maybe some time on my rower?
Well, let's see. First, meditation, then breakfast - an allotment trip is also likely, so maybe I'll save my strength till I get the day's activities mapped out.
And a question: why don't I want to spend any time practising Yoga? I am oddly reluctant. What's the problem, I wonder?
10stone 13lbs, 38 1/4" (later it was 38 1/2" still empty)
Emotional ups and downs, I'm heavier than I was on Saturday, but lighter than I was last Monday. Fasting. Lets see how it turns out.
4:17pm Interesting - I've only just had a caffeinated drink today. I had such a good sleep last night - it was very restorative. This is a fairly easy fast, only the odd floating thought of a snack leapt into my mind at one point, but that passed quickly. Energy OK
I can't imagine how such an easy fast can lead to any noticeable weight/waist loss, but let's see.
DISCOVERY: SWEETENERS DO SEEM TO MAKE ME FEEL HUNGRIER WHEN FASTING I used sweeteners during my last fast and my stomach was gurgling and growling like it never had before - and I felt SO HUNGRY! Today I've not had caffeine till just now (and I do have a mild headache, finally), a cup of instant coffee, but I had it a little watered down and without sweeteners, it is bearable and my stomach seems to be at peace.
Emotional ups and downs, I'm heavier than I was on Saturday, but lighter than I was last Monday. Fasting. Lets see how it turns out.
4:17pm Interesting - I've only just had a caffeinated drink today. I had such a good sleep last night - it was very restorative. This is a fairly easy fast, only the odd floating thought of a snack leapt into my mind at one point, but that passed quickly. Energy OK
I can't imagine how such an easy fast can lead to any noticeable weight/waist loss, but let's see.
DISCOVERY: SWEETENERS DO SEEM TO MAKE ME FEEL HUNGRIER WHEN FASTING I used sweeteners during my last fast and my stomach was gurgling and growling like it never had before - and I felt SO HUNGRY! Today I've not had caffeine till just now (and I do have a mild headache, finally), a cup of instant coffee, but I had it a little watered down and without sweeteners, it is bearable and my stomach seems to be at peace.
10stone 12 3/4 lbs, 38 1/8", BMI 24, WHtR 56.9%, Body Fat 30.9%
I could hardly be bothered to measure this morning. There were no surprises, nor were any expected. Just the gradual recovery from the draining experience of yet another fast after @3 months of of twice-weekly fasting.
I'm doing what I can to preserve my energy levels and improve my nutrition, but this is a drag, and I estimate I'm only 1/3 to 1/4 of the way through! @ 2 1/2" waist and 14lbs dropped in @ 12 weeks - but I need to lose another 5 to 8" off my waist! (per independent statistical sources looking at "healthy" or "ideal" bodily proportions, particularly bearing in mind that I am "small boned" and should be towards the lower end of weight/size for my height)
A 35 3/4" waist would be a meaningful intermediate goal : at that point I'd be just below the category of "Increased Risk" (for CHD etc) rather than in it. i would need to lose another 2 3/8" off my waist - that's about as much again as I've lost so far - but would I be losing another 14lbs* to do it? (I started off in the category of "Substantially increased risk" with WHtR of 60%)
* I "Did the math" - I can answer that question! My starting weight was 166, waist 40 1/2" with an estimated body fat of 33.8%. The ADA advise male body fat between 15 and 18% - so I'd need to lose @ 17% of 166 = 28 1/4 lbs. Already shed 13 1/4lbs in 12 weeks, I'd need to lose another 15lbs (provided it was all fat! Any lost muscle would have to be compensated for by even more weight/fat loss to get to a desired body fat %) (oh, not sure what my waist would be then, only that a desirable body fat % would be probable)
This is confusing: from a Waist point of view, I'm only 1/4 to 1/3 the way to a healthy state as I've only lost 2 1/2" out of the 7 1/2" to 10" I'd ideally need to shed BUT, assuming my initial body fat % estimate was correct, I only need to shed 28 1/2 lbs in total and I'm nearly half way there! Why are these numbers SO contradictory? It's the difference between, say, 15 weeks ( Nov 24) and 45 weeks! (end of June 2011!)
FAILURE
I could hardly be bothered to measure this morning. There were no surprises, nor were any expected. Just the gradual recovery from the draining experience of yet another fast after @3 months of of twice-weekly fasting.
I'm doing what I can to preserve my energy levels and improve my nutrition, but this is a drag, and I estimate I'm only 1/3 to 1/4 of the way through! @ 2 1/2" waist and 14lbs dropped in @ 12 weeks - but I need to lose another 5 to 8" off my waist! (per independent statistical sources looking at "healthy" or "ideal" bodily proportions, particularly bearing in mind that I am "small boned" and should be towards the lower end of weight/size for my height)
A 35 3/4" waist would be a meaningful intermediate goal : at that point I'd be just below the category of "Increased Risk" (for CHD etc) rather than in it. i would need to lose another 2 3/8" off my waist - that's about as much again as I've lost so far - but would I be losing another 14lbs* to do it? (I started off in the category of "Substantially increased risk" with WHtR of 60%)
* I "Did the math" - I can answer that question! My starting weight was 166, waist 40 1/2" with an estimated body fat of 33.8%. The ADA advise male body fat between 15 and 18% - so I'd need to lose @ 17% of 166 = 28 1/4 lbs. Already shed 13 1/4lbs in 12 weeks, I'd need to lose another 15lbs (provided it was all fat! Any lost muscle would have to be compensated for by even more weight/fat loss to get to a desired body fat %) (oh, not sure what my waist would be then, only that a desirable body fat % would be probable)
This is confusing: from a Waist point of view, I'm only 1/4 to 1/3 the way to a healthy state as I've only lost 2 1/2" out of the 7 1/2" to 10" I'd ideally need to shed BUT, assuming my initial body fat % estimate was correct, I only need to shed 28 1/2 lbs in total and I'm nearly half way there! Why are these numbers SO contradictory? It's the difference between, say, 15 weeks ( Nov 24) and 45 weeks! (end of June 2011!)
FAILURE
10 stone 12 3/4 Waist 38 1/2" Shit. Spending too much time with SO, coming home watching late recorded TV and drinking milk after time spent with temptation to "just make some space on your plate for dessert" - it's fruit, not a sugary concoction, it isnt a "sweet" - yet here I am with a waist gain, feeling I'm being pulled off No S compliance by these "well intended" actions of hers - I feel so undermined, but I don't know how to fight it - it isn't overtly hostile - it is destructive "hospitality" - love=food probably behind it all.
I feel so WEAK and ASHAMED - like a child, I am not a child, I have no excuse, I feel my control being pulled away from me, by her, over and over again, what must I DO?
I feel so WEAK and ASHAMED - like a child, I am not a child, I have no excuse, I feel my control being pulled away from me, by her, over and over again, what must I DO?
Graham, that is hard.
My "food pusher" (because food=love) was my mom. We used to fight the moment I walked in the house, because she would start offering me food and I'd refuse. This would continue until I finally got irritated, at which point she'd say in a hurt tone "you don't have to snap at me." Sigh.
The way I finally resolved that was a "broken record" technique - coming up with a polite refusal I could repeat over and over (carefully, in the same even tone of voice) that I used when the interaction began. (Mine was a simple "no thanks, I'm not hungry.") The first time, I only made it through by making a game of it... how long would she go? (Twenty minutes from the time I started counting!!) HOWEVER... at every visit it got shorter, and eventually it dropped to a simple offer/refusal. The day I walked in and WAS hungry and had to ASK if I could get something was a milestone.
During the process, as I became more confident in my ability to protect my boundaries, the phrases I used became more varied and kinder - "That sounds great, Mom. I'm not hungry now, but maybe later." Essentially, I was able to refuse the food, but acknowledge the love. And since then, that's what I try to do with "food pushers" - usually, they want to be appreciated for taking care of you, for being a good cook, whatever. So, appreciate without eating.
In your case, maybe you could come up with a direct, polite request that would work when she presses after a first refusal. Something like "I know you're trying to be hospitable/loving , but it is stressful to me when you ask me to eat more than I want to. Please respect the boundaries I need to set with food right now." (And then change the subject to something pleasant...)
Just a thought. I hope you can work through this - you seem to be stressing yourself enough without help! (Reading your last post but one...you are obsessing about numbers and time lines, and ignoring that you've lost a great deal of weight. Stop and give yourself a gold star and a round of applause, man!!
)
Best wishes!! (I wish I could do the funny emoticons like BA does - I'd put a round of applause for you right here.)
My "food pusher" (because food=love) was my mom. We used to fight the moment I walked in the house, because she would start offering me food and I'd refuse. This would continue until I finally got irritated, at which point she'd say in a hurt tone "you don't have to snap at me." Sigh.
The way I finally resolved that was a "broken record" technique - coming up with a polite refusal I could repeat over and over (carefully, in the same even tone of voice) that I used when the interaction began. (Mine was a simple "no thanks, I'm not hungry.") The first time, I only made it through by making a game of it... how long would she go? (Twenty minutes from the time I started counting!!) HOWEVER... at every visit it got shorter, and eventually it dropped to a simple offer/refusal. The day I walked in and WAS hungry and had to ASK if I could get something was a milestone.
During the process, as I became more confident in my ability to protect my boundaries, the phrases I used became more varied and kinder - "That sounds great, Mom. I'm not hungry now, but maybe later." Essentially, I was able to refuse the food, but acknowledge the love. And since then, that's what I try to do with "food pushers" - usually, they want to be appreciated for taking care of you, for being a good cook, whatever. So, appreciate without eating.
In your case, maybe you could come up with a direct, polite request that would work when she presses after a first refusal. Something like "I know you're trying to be hospitable/loving , but it is stressful to me when you ask me to eat more than I want to. Please respect the boundaries I need to set with food right now." (And then change the subject to something pleasant...)
Just a thought. I hope you can work through this - you seem to be stressing yourself enough without help! (Reading your last post but one...you are obsessing about numbers and time lines, and ignoring that you've lost a great deal of weight. Stop and give yourself a gold star and a round of applause, man!!
) Best wishes!! (I wish I could do the funny emoticons like BA does - I'd put a round of applause for you right here.)
KCCC, thanks for wise words and encouragement - trouble with your suggestion is that SO is inviting me to do things that I'm already conflicted about. So not only am I struggling with her subtle, repeated invitations to have seconds, snacks or sweets - but my own desire for them as well! That is what makes it so wearing, and makes my responses sometimes harsh and shaming.KCCC wrote:Graham, that is hard.
During the process, as I became more confident in my ability to protect my boundaries, the phrases I used became more varied and kinder - "That sounds great, Mom. I'm not hungry now, but maybe later." Essentially, I was able to refuse the food, but acknowledge the love. And since then, that's what I try to do with "food pushers" - usually, they want to be appreciated for taking care of you, for being a good cook, whatever. So, appreciate without eating.
In your case, maybe you could come up with a direct, polite request that would work when she presses after a first refusal. Something like "I know you're trying to be hospitable/loving , but it is stressful to me when you ask me to eat more than I want to. Please respect the boundaries I need to set with food right now."
Being able to protect my boundaries - yes, a problem for me, most of my life I've been around people who had no idea how to respect them, manipulation so frequent it took years to notice it wasn't normal, and even now, decades later, I'm not too good at spotting it or handling it.
SCALES GONE CRAZY! Probably needs new battery. Waist 38 1/4"
I think I am lighter this morning, and I missed knowing a bit - but it said 10 stone 12 3/4, then 13 3/4 and I re-weighed at 10 stone 10 1/4 -so I would't know what to write down. I need that data - and I don't need it.
The data can help to keep me from dishonesty - the scales don't lie. If I don't have that data, I do have to be strict with No S compliance or I'll fail.
I think I am lighter this morning, and I missed knowing a bit - but it said 10 stone 12 3/4, then 13 3/4 and I re-weighed at 10 stone 10 1/4 -so I would't know what to write down. I need that data - and I don't need it.
The data can help to keep me from dishonesty - the scales don't lie. If I don't have that data, I do have to be strict with No S compliance or I'll fail.
Yes, that is VERY hard - that's where I was with my mom too, fragile in my own ability to refuse food. (I often binged at her house even after I had learned to eat reasonably on my own.) I think coming up with a good, repeatable phrase helped ME too - I heard myself say that I wasn't having any over and over, and started to believe it myself.Graham wrote:
KCCC, thanks for wise words and encouragement - trouble with your suggestion is that SO is inviting me to do things that I'm already conflicted about. So not only am I struggling with her subtle, repeated invitations to have seconds, snacks or sweets - but my own desire for them as well! That is what makes it so wearing, and makes my responses sometimes harsh and shaming.
Being able to protect my boundaries - yes, a problem for me, most of my life I've been around people who had no idea how to respect them, manipulation so frequent it took years to notice it wasn't normal, and even now, decades later, I'm not too good at spotting it or handling it.
There's a very good book called "The Dance of Anger" that helped me a great deal with boundary-setting. (And the author - Harriet Lehrer - has written some more recent ones too.) That's where I got the broken-record technique.
Best wishes!
It is a new day, but not by much: 1:32am, can't report my weight because my scales are unreliable AND I haven't been to bed yet, it's really "Thursday night" to me.
Kitty died sometime today
I came home just after midnight from the Dalston Milonga and she didn't show up with the other two for her evening meal. Suspecting bad news I searched the flat and then the garden, where I found her, stretched out, cold, wet and stiff. She was just a foot from the cat flap - as though she'd been intending to come in but had died right there, before she could attempt to enter.
I hope it was quick and didn't hurt. She was very old and infirm and I was dreading having to have her put down - it is a dreadful decision to have to make, and I'm grateful it didn't come to that.
My two remaining cats seem completely indifferent. I don't think ordinary cats do grief.
And I just realised, I drank a cup of milky decaff coffee, and I'm supposed to be FASTING. Not surprising I was a bit distracted tonight.
Kitty died sometime today
I came home just after midnight from the Dalston Milonga and she didn't show up with the other two for her evening meal. Suspecting bad news I searched the flat and then the garden, where I found her, stretched out, cold, wet and stiff. She was just a foot from the cat flap - as though she'd been intending to come in but had died right there, before she could attempt to enter.
I hope it was quick and didn't hurt. She was very old and infirm and I was dreading having to have her put down - it is a dreadful decision to have to make, and I'm grateful it didn't come to that.
My two remaining cats seem completely indifferent. I don't think ordinary cats do grief.
And I just realised, I drank a cup of milky decaff coffee, and I'm supposed to be FASTING. Not surprising I was a bit distracted tonight.
10stone 12lbs 38 1/8" BMI 23.9, WHtR 56.9% Body Fat 31.1% Fasting
KCCC, Thtrchic, thank you both for kind words, I'm not feeling too bad just now, it was the end of a very long, gradual decline, so there was no shock, I was expecting it sometime soon. The coming days may see more of a reaction - she was part of my life for a long time (@15 years)
I've decided to give my scales a chance again with the battery unchanged - the reading seemed credible - were they too affected by what was to come yesterday?
11:02pm The end of the day, a demanding fast (hungry frequently), a just-about compliant meal (that would be easier with more protein on the plate)now I drink my decaf coffee and prepare for bed, with hope of good numbers tomorrow morning.
KCCC, Thtrchic, thank you both for kind words, I'm not feeling too bad just now, it was the end of a very long, gradual decline, so there was no shock, I was expecting it sometime soon. The coming days may see more of a reaction - she was part of my life for a long time (@15 years)
I've decided to give my scales a chance again with the battery unchanged - the reading seemed credible - were they too affected by what was to come yesterday?
11:02pm The end of the day, a demanding fast (hungry frequently), a just-about compliant meal (that would be easier with more protein on the plate)now I drink my decaf coffee and prepare for bed, with hope of good numbers tomorrow morning.
10 stone 11 1/2 lbs, 38 1/4" BMI 23.8, WHtR 57.1%, Body Fat 31.6%
Lighter by 1/2lb than yesterday, which would be fine if it was all fat.. What to think? It wasn't easy, I felt hungry frequently, my waist is the same, but a couple of weeks back I think I "lost" about 3lbs in a week or so, perhaps that was the false note, not this apparent plateau?
Lighter by 1/2lb than yesterday, which would be fine if it was all fat.. What to think? It wasn't easy, I felt hungry frequently, my waist is the same, but a couple of weeks back I think I "lost" about 3lbs in a week or so, perhaps that was the false note, not this apparent plateau?
Waist 37 3/4", Weight @10stone 13lbs BMI 24, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 29.9%
I wasn't at home to use my scales, had reliable tape measure and iffy old bathroom scales, weighed at home after 2 cups of coffee and a bike ride at 10stone 13 3/4lbs, so the initial reading may be right - I don't mind too much when my waist is getting trimmer - measured it twice just to be sure - before and after bathroom.
I wasn't at home to use my scales, had reliable tape measure and iffy old bathroom scales, weighed at home after 2 cups of coffee and a bike ride at 10stone 13 3/4lbs, so the initial reading may be right - I don't mind too much when my waist is getting trimmer - measured it twice just to be sure - before and after bathroom.
10stone 13 3/4lbs 38 1/2" BMI 24.1, WHtR 57.5%, Body Fat 31.7% Fasting
No wild excesses and yet... I have put on 3/4" waist in a day and 2 1/4lbs over the weekend. There isn't anything obvious that I would say I wish I hadn't done. The fruit we've worked to grow ripens, and we eat it - blackberries with cream, plum tart with cream - it's all wonderful stuff, and I wouldn't miss it. No gargantuan meals, no binges, nothing to point to and say "that was too much" - so, must I just accept S-day gains?
Trends are the issue - not the daily ups and downs but more importantly the weekly/monthly trends. As I get lighter, my calorific needs will somewhat dwindle, but not by much. (fat doesn't need many calories to maintain)
5:12pm This makes no sense: I've put on 2 14lbs weight over the weekend, therefore I must have eaten and stored plenty of calories, yet I am SO HUNGRY TODAY! My only major exertion was my isometrics workout, and a short-ish bike ride - yet I've felt frequently hungry.
I feel very tempted to end my fast early. I know my evening meal yesterday was a bit low in protein - (vegetable soup with a little cheese, then fruit and plum tart with cream - filling but not proteinaceous.) I will hang on in there as I'm hoping the pain will bring proportionate gain.. but that's a dream that's disappointed me before!
No wild excesses and yet... I have put on 3/4" waist in a day and 2 1/4lbs over the weekend. There isn't anything obvious that I would say I wish I hadn't done. The fruit we've worked to grow ripens, and we eat it - blackberries with cream, plum tart with cream - it's all wonderful stuff, and I wouldn't miss it. No gargantuan meals, no binges, nothing to point to and say "that was too much" - so, must I just accept S-day gains?
Trends are the issue - not the daily ups and downs but more importantly the weekly/monthly trends. As I get lighter, my calorific needs will somewhat dwindle, but not by much. (fat doesn't need many calories to maintain)
5:12pm This makes no sense: I've put on 2 14lbs weight over the weekend, therefore I must have eaten and stored plenty of calories, yet I am SO HUNGRY TODAY! My only major exertion was my isometrics workout, and a short-ish bike ride - yet I've felt frequently hungry.
I feel very tempted to end my fast early. I know my evening meal yesterday was a bit low in protein - (vegetable soup with a little cheese, then fruit and plum tart with cream - filling but not proteinaceous.) I will hang on in there as I'm hoping the pain will bring proportionate gain.. but that's a dream that's disappointed me before!
10stone 11 1/2lbs 38 1/8" BMI 23.8, WHtR 56.9%, Body Fat 31.3%
For about 3 weeks I've been revisiting 10 stone 11 and a bit, with dramas in between. Here I am again. Considering where I was yesterday morning, this is a good place to be - looking over the past 3 weeks it's less satisfying. When I examine my graphs over the last few months, I see the pattern isn't totally new - periods that seem to be oscillation around a fixed value for a few weeks, then a plunge to a new median - more like steps than a slope.
6:08pm, a stomach upset of some kind, so I didn't fancy lunch. Well, I might if someone else had been willing to cook it, and it was appetising, but, as it was, just water seemed best as even tea seemed too harsh. Now I've a tango class at 8pm - how is my energy? Do I need food to be sure to function well? Not sure at all just now.
For about 3 weeks I've been revisiting 10 stone 11 and a bit, with dramas in between. Here I am again. Considering where I was yesterday morning, this is a good place to be - looking over the past 3 weeks it's less satisfying. When I examine my graphs over the last few months, I see the pattern isn't totally new - periods that seem to be oscillation around a fixed value for a few weeks, then a plunge to a new median - more like steps than a slope.
6:08pm, a stomach upset of some kind, so I didn't fancy lunch. Well, I might if someone else had been willing to cook it, and it was appetising, but, as it was, just water seemed best as even tea seemed too harsh. Now I've a tango class at 8pm - how is my energy? Do I need food to be sure to function well? Not sure at all just now.
10stone 10lbs, Waist 37 5/8" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.2%, Body Fat 30.3% Biceps BP 114/68 pulse 55 Wrist 102/74 pulse 53 (compare pulse pressure: biceps 46, wrist 28 - they CAN'T both be right)
New lowest/slimmest. Given a helping hand by a stomach upset yesterday - only 2 meals - though I didn't feel hungry when I went to bed early (11:30)
I slept fitfully - waking every couple of hours. I'd had yet another clash with H - was that keeping me awake? I didn't dwell on her during those wakeful moments - more just a "what time is it now?" and then turning to soothing thoughts that brought another couple of hours of sleep.
Today I'm at a weight I haven't seen for many years, though I recall, when I was last this weight, I had a trimmer waistline. I don't remember having the strangely shaped bulging mid-line I have these days - a bit like a frog!
Not long ago I pondered rapid weight gain, today I'm seeing the second of two days of fairly quick weight loss - not in the same league, only 3 3/4lb lost, the gain was 5 1/4 - hardly seems fair! But anyway, something(s) in my system which aren't fat can come and go fairly quickly, including waist inches. Tricky to measure something which is hollow accurately anyway.
New lowest/slimmest. Given a helping hand by a stomach upset yesterday - only 2 meals - though I didn't feel hungry when I went to bed early (11:30)
I slept fitfully - waking every couple of hours. I'd had yet another clash with H - was that keeping me awake? I didn't dwell on her during those wakeful moments - more just a "what time is it now?" and then turning to soothing thoughts that brought another couple of hours of sleep.
Today I'm at a weight I haven't seen for many years, though I recall, when I was last this weight, I had a trimmer waistline. I don't remember having the strangely shaped bulging mid-line I have these days - a bit like a frog!
Not long ago I pondered rapid weight gain, today I'm seeing the second of two days of fairly quick weight loss - not in the same league, only 3 3/4lb lost, the gain was 5 1/4 - hardly seems fair! But anyway, something(s) in my system which aren't fat can come and go fairly quickly, including waist inches. Tricky to measure something which is hollow accurately anyway.
10 stone 10 1/2lbs, Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.8%
Not fasting, why did H ask me not to? Anyway, was feeling a tad depleted so waiting one more day won't hurt. Did some extra bike riding yesterday. I don't have food for today! My shopping would have fitted a fast today, even though I feel a little needy. Damn
11:53am Thinking about 10 stone 10: it feels familiar - and values below it seem like a journey into the unknown! Trousers with 34" waist also feel familiar - 32" is from so long ago, I hardly remember when. The reality is this: I measure at @ 38" but my trousers say 34". They fit comfortably. This is probably how the clothes industry operates. Maybe the waist has to press in a bit so trousers don't fall down?
I'm feeling a bit obsessed with my numbers today: I need to focus on the rest of my life - weight loss will happen whether I'm looking or not, if I continue to do what works.
Not fasting, why did H ask me not to? Anyway, was feeling a tad depleted so waiting one more day won't hurt. Did some extra bike riding yesterday. I don't have food for today! My shopping would have fitted a fast today, even though I feel a little needy. Damn
11:53am Thinking about 10 stone 10: it feels familiar - and values below it seem like a journey into the unknown! Trousers with 34" waist also feel familiar - 32" is from so long ago, I hardly remember when. The reality is this: I measure at @ 38" but my trousers say 34". They fit comfortably. This is probably how the clothes industry operates. Maybe the waist has to press in a bit so trousers don't fall down?
I'm feeling a bit obsessed with my numbers today: I need to focus on the rest of my life - weight loss will happen whether I'm looking or not, if I continue to do what works.
10 stone 13 1/4lbs waist 38 1/4" BMI 24.1, WHtR 57.1%, 31.2% Fasting
Asking about yesterday - there was a lot of buttered bread/toast (including 4 slices of toast with beans on for a late kunch) and some plum tart - was the wheat the bloat factor? Can I be 10 10 again tomorrow morning? Seems a bit unlikely. But, key question, will I be 10 stone 9lb by next Wednesday? Never mind, got stuff to do, another puncture fixed but the bike needs yet more attention.
6:54pm slight headache, will eat soon. Most of the day my ENERGY was GOOD.
Asking about yesterday - there was a lot of buttered bread/toast (including 4 slices of toast with beans on for a late kunch) and some plum tart - was the wheat the bloat factor? Can I be 10 10 again tomorrow morning? Seems a bit unlikely. But, key question, will I be 10 stone 9lb by next Wednesday? Never mind, got stuff to do, another puncture fixed but the bike needs yet more attention.
6:54pm slight headache, will eat soon. Most of the day my ENERGY was GOOD.
10 stone 12 3/4lbs waist 38" BMI 24, WHtR 56.7% Body Fat 30.6% biceps BP 108/73 pulse 51 wrist BP 89/71 pulse 52
Yesterday's fast was a modest success, but from a high baseline. My energy felt good though, unlike the previous day, so perhaps yesterday's starting weight was "healthier" than Thursday's. (Perhaps more glycogen in liver and muscles)
Today is an S day - I own 2 high quality chocolate products! I left them at SO's to avoid excess and impatience. I have pancake mix too, yet I'm not needy so far.
Dreaming, - how will my body feel with all the waist fat gone? How much fun will that be? How great will I feel? Long road, dreams keep me going.
11:01 and post-breakfast lethargy washes over me. I actually like it, it is only the requirements of the day that make it inconvenient. (Breakfast was: orange juice with lysine, proline, vitamin C, brewers yeast, 3 fried sausages, onions, 3 slices of buttered toast, coffee with sweeteners)
gone midnight: Ramshackle eating: some chocolates, some biscuits, some digging, some walking, some cycling, some sweetcorn and a final cold sausage sandwich.
Yesterday's fast was a modest success, but from a high baseline. My energy felt good though, unlike the previous day, so perhaps yesterday's starting weight was "healthier" than Thursday's. (Perhaps more glycogen in liver and muscles)
Today is an S day - I own 2 high quality chocolate products! I left them at SO's to avoid excess and impatience. I have pancake mix too, yet I'm not needy so far.
Dreaming, - how will my body feel with all the waist fat gone? How much fun will that be? How great will I feel? Long road, dreams keep me going.
11:01 and post-breakfast lethargy washes over me. I actually like it, it is only the requirements of the day that make it inconvenient. (Breakfast was: orange juice with lysine, proline, vitamin C, brewers yeast, 3 fried sausages, onions, 3 slices of buttered toast, coffee with sweeteners)
gone midnight: Ramshackle eating: some chocolates, some biscuits, some digging, some walking, some cycling, some sweetcorn and a final cold sausage sandwich.
10 stone 13 1/4llb 38 1/4" BMI 24.1, WHtR 57.1, Body Fat 31.2% BP wrist 100/62 pulse 54 0r Biceps 110/65 pulse 55
My goals seem further away than ever today. Can I see this through to the end? It takes SO LONG, and I slide back so much.
For now, I'll hold my feelings in check, and observe - but looking over the past 3 weeks, Sunday by Sunday, I've lost 1/2lb in that time. Pathetic. I have had some days of depletion, deep weariness, days of struggle - all for half a pound.
I could hate my body on days like this, and all the false friends and commercial interests who find it profitable to push people to be fat or addicted to alcohol and tobacco.
My goals seem further away than ever today. Can I see this through to the end? It takes SO LONG, and I slide back so much.
For now, I'll hold my feelings in check, and observe - but looking over the past 3 weeks, Sunday by Sunday, I've lost 1/2lb in that time. Pathetic. I have had some days of depletion, deep weariness, days of struggle - all for half a pound.
I could hate my body on days like this, and all the false friends and commercial interests who find it profitable to push people to be fat or addicted to alcohol and tobacco.
10 stone 13 3/4 lbs Waist 38 1/4" BMI 24.1, WHtR 57.1%, Body Fat 31%
This is close to a plateau. I am not seeing clearly, my behaviour is the cause, what self-deception am I practising to get myself stuck?
I've spent a lot of time in the last week or two eating at SO's and her cuisine subverts my efforts. I haven't pushed the issue, I wanted to avoid yet more conflict, but when I find food disappointing I overeat. The main issue is carbs versus protein, she's a carb lover, I am sick of the bloody stuff but getting space to differ seems an enormous battle.
Looks like I overeat rather than fight. Niceness or cowardice?
The reality of this past weekend was that I felt more desire for sweets and snacks - bought and ate chocolates and biscuits. Not disgusting amounts, but more than moderate. If I'd been eating meat and veg meals, how might I have managed? On a carb heavy diet, this is how I function, and I hate it, but feel it is too awkward to have the several-times a day fights to get a change happening. I don't like this about me.
10:27 I did some inner searching, posted my thoughts, now I seem to have "accidentally" deleted them! No time to fix that now, gotta go...
This is close to a plateau. I am not seeing clearly, my behaviour is the cause, what self-deception am I practising to get myself stuck?
I've spent a lot of time in the last week or two eating at SO's and her cuisine subverts my efforts. I haven't pushed the issue, I wanted to avoid yet more conflict, but when I find food disappointing I overeat. The main issue is carbs versus protein, she's a carb lover, I am sick of the bloody stuff but getting space to differ seems an enormous battle.
Looks like I overeat rather than fight. Niceness or cowardice?
The reality of this past weekend was that I felt more desire for sweets and snacks - bought and ate chocolates and biscuits. Not disgusting amounts, but more than moderate. If I'd been eating meat and veg meals, how might I have managed? On a carb heavy diet, this is how I function, and I hate it, but feel it is too awkward to have the several-times a day fights to get a change happening. I don't like this about me.
10:27 I did some inner searching, posted my thoughts, now I seem to have "accidentally" deleted them! No time to fix that now, gotta go...
10 stone 12lbs waist 38" BMI 23.9, WHtR 56.7%, Body Fat 30.8%
I'm a bit worried - I noticed snack cravings not only on the weekend, but carrying forward to yesterday. I didn't take any supplements or pay particular attention to the quality of last night's post-fast meal (well, I'd been hoping to have chips(french fries) with lamb chops but discovered I'd got new potatoes which I had to simply boil, nice enough but didn't hit the spot)
What am I to think about being 10 st 10 lbs last Wednesday? I can't expect to be that light this Wednesday - what happened for heaven's sake?
9:10am woken too early by noisy cat, cat woken by downstairs neighbour. I am now very irritable. Am I also affected by the onion I ate last night - it was very strong, the flavour lingers, I can still taste it. Can one be "poisoned" by strong onions? Is it upsetting me? (not my digestion, that is fine, I mean my mood.)
5:27pm A light late lunch as my breakfast experience stayed with me and deterred further eating for many hours. Lettuce, carrot, vinaigrette, home-cooked 1/4 lb burger and 2 slices of buttered toast. Sets me up nicely for tonight's tango class - and a choice about whether to eat again afterwards or not, as seems fitting. (and the difficult mood abated)
I'm a bit worried - I noticed snack cravings not only on the weekend, but carrying forward to yesterday. I didn't take any supplements or pay particular attention to the quality of last night's post-fast meal (well, I'd been hoping to have chips(french fries) with lamb chops but discovered I'd got new potatoes which I had to simply boil, nice enough but didn't hit the spot)
What am I to think about being 10 st 10 lbs last Wednesday? I can't expect to be that light this Wednesday - what happened for heaven's sake?
9:10am woken too early by noisy cat, cat woken by downstairs neighbour. I am now very irritable. Am I also affected by the onion I ate last night - it was very strong, the flavour lingers, I can still taste it. Can one be "poisoned" by strong onions? Is it upsetting me? (not my digestion, that is fine, I mean my mood.)
5:27pm A light late lunch as my breakfast experience stayed with me and deterred further eating for many hours. Lettuce, carrot, vinaigrette, home-cooked 1/4 lb burger and 2 slices of buttered toast. Sets me up nicely for tonight's tango class - and a choice about whether to eat again afterwards or not, as seems fitting. (and the difficult mood abated)
10stone 12 1/4lbs Waist 38 3/8" BMI 23.9, WHtR 57.3%, Body Fat 31.8% BP: biceps 117/76 pulse 48 or wrist 101/73 pulse 46
I've got a bit fed up of fried breakfasts and meat 3 times a day - so, once again, I've taken the risk of having porridge. (1cup oats, 3 cups of 50/50 milk and water) I added some cashew nuts and raisins, served with milk and sweetened it with golden syrup, used my biggest bowl, but still I feel hungry now, I wanted to eat more, it didn't feel like enough (unlike a fried breakfast, when I cook them they keep me going to lunch-time - this "meal" has made me feel hungry only half an hour later. I either need an even bigger bowl, or to make the porridge thicker, or I'll need seconds to feel like I had enough to eat.
It is at times like this that No S seems so silly, when I'm thinking "I need to go out and buy a really big bowl" instead of saying that my bowl is actually a "half bowl" when I could allow myself to fill it twice - but no, that would be "seconds" so I have to endure nagging hunger all the way to lunchtime now! What a damn nuisance!
(Later: I now realise, this problem is purely because I make fairly liquid porridge. If I liked it thicker, I wouldn't need to write any of the foregoing, because I'd have a more calorie-dense bowlful - so I'm penalised because I like a lot of thin porridge instead of a smaller quantity of thick porridge - with the same overall calories!
)
2:17pm further realisation: I really should try making thicker porridge, just in case it solves the "hungry as soon as I've finished" problem. (or use a salad bowl???)
PS: Another idea - do like the Tibetans and put some butter in the porridge! - it may be the lower fat content which makes me feel so empty just after I've eaten it.
1:47pm Odd events: After the breakfast above (with half a fresh apple as well) I took supplements which stuck in my throat, then washed them down with tea, vigorous 10 minute bike-ride to Tottenham, and it seemed like the now acidified porridge was trying to get back out of my stomach up into my throat! Unpleasant for a few minutes, made me cough.
I am OK now, the hunger issue subsided - it could be it's the golden syrup which is triggering a brief sugar/insulin spike and, once past that, I'm OK. I certainly feel like it's too soon to eat lunch yet.
I've got a bit fed up of fried breakfasts and meat 3 times a day - so, once again, I've taken the risk of having porridge. (1cup oats, 3 cups of 50/50 milk and water) I added some cashew nuts and raisins, served with milk and sweetened it with golden syrup, used my biggest bowl, but still I feel hungry now, I wanted to eat more, it didn't feel like enough (unlike a fried breakfast, when I cook them they keep me going to lunch-time - this "meal" has made me feel hungry only half an hour later. I either need an even bigger bowl, or to make the porridge thicker, or I'll need seconds to feel like I had enough to eat.
It is at times like this that No S seems so silly, when I'm thinking "I need to go out and buy a really big bowl" instead of saying that my bowl is actually a "half bowl" when I could allow myself to fill it twice - but no, that would be "seconds" so I have to endure nagging hunger all the way to lunchtime now! What a damn nuisance!
(Later: I now realise, this problem is purely because I make fairly liquid porridge. If I liked it thicker, I wouldn't need to write any of the foregoing, because I'd have a more calorie-dense bowlful - so I'm penalised because I like a lot of thin porridge instead of a smaller quantity of thick porridge - with the same overall calories!
)2:17pm further realisation: I really should try making thicker porridge, just in case it solves the "hungry as soon as I've finished" problem. (or use a salad bowl???)
PS: Another idea - do like the Tibetans and put some butter in the porridge! - it may be the lower fat content which makes me feel so empty just after I've eaten it.
1:47pm Odd events: After the breakfast above (with half a fresh apple as well) I took supplements which stuck in my throat, then washed them down with tea, vigorous 10 minute bike-ride to Tottenham, and it seemed like the now acidified porridge was trying to get back out of my stomach up into my throat! Unpleasant for a few minutes, made me cough.
I am OK now, the hunger issue subsided - it could be it's the golden syrup which is triggering a brief sugar/insulin spike and, once past that, I'm OK. I certainly feel like it's too soon to eat lunch yet.
Last edited by Graham on Thu Aug 26, 2010 7:43 am, edited 2 times in total.
10 stone 11 1/2 lbs, waist 38 1/8" BMI 23.8, WHtR 56.9% Body Fat 31.3% BP wrist 101/71 pulse 52 or biceps 103/77 pulse 55 ...FASTING
Yesterday's porridge was an experiment worth repeating. I ended up not having lunch and being invited for an evening meal, declared the day an S day so I could have seconds and sweet dessert - a smart move. However, today I'm invited to dine again with the same person, I am fasting now, I'm wondering, should I make it another S day or try to make it a one plate meal this evening? (Chicken curry!)
The figures, compared to yesterday, are some encouragement, but I'm exactly where I was on Tuesday 17th, 9 DAYS AGO! God this is SO SLOW! Could I possibly weigh 10stone 10lbs by next Wednesday? That would mean I was at least still losing 1lb a week on the ESE/No S combination. I'm getting so sick of this tedious process!
5:56pm I have a slight headache. I look forward to 4 things just now, but one is secret: the other 3 are: meditating, this evening's fast-breaking meal (at the correct time, no rushing it) and having porridge for breakfast again really soon.
Yesterday's porridge was an experiment worth repeating. I ended up not having lunch and being invited for an evening meal, declared the day an S day so I could have seconds and sweet dessert - a smart move. However, today I'm invited to dine again with the same person, I am fasting now, I'm wondering, should I make it another S day or try to make it a one plate meal this evening? (Chicken curry!)
The figures, compared to yesterday, are some encouragement, but I'm exactly where I was on Tuesday 17th, 9 DAYS AGO! God this is SO SLOW! Could I possibly weigh 10stone 10lbs by next Wednesday? That would mean I was at least still losing 1lb a week on the ESE/No S combination. I'm getting so sick of this tedious process!
5:56pm I have a slight headache. I look forward to 4 things just now, but one is secret: the other 3 are: meditating, this evening's fast-breaking meal (at the correct time, no rushing it) and having porridge for breakfast again really soon.
10 stone 11 1/2 lbs Waist 38" BMI 23.8, WHtR 56.7% Body Fat 30.9%
Feeling a bit bleak. Not these figures only, wider life issues too, but it's all mixed together.
Yesterday: the fast wasn't easy, I had a mild headache from time to time. The fast ending meal was curried chicken served in bowls with the custom of take some, then take more as you need/wish, eaten with naan bread. So, I decided to make it another exempt day. Didn't eat wildly but I did think "it's an exempt day - I can have some chocolate" so I did. 4 chocolates. Then when I came home, somehow the cold porridge left from yesterday's breakfast seemed alluring and I had that too - I sort of felt I'd be better for it - the food I'd eaten was very spicy and I hoped the porridge would mop it up.
Today I feel strange - spices and my mood and my assessment of my life all connive to produce the current state. I have meditated and eaten porridge, made thicker as I'd planned, though I now feel stuffed - I wasn't truly hungry, but I wanted to be sure I get to lunch feeling OK.
I had an excellent lunch! lettuce, grated carrot and garlic vinaigrette accompanied a home-cooked burger with cheese, onion and mushrooms - that's 4 of my "5 a day" at one meal!
Failure A Farley's Rusk and nostalgia caused the initial failure - later came an invitation to dine from someone I have a soft spot for, despite guessing the food wasn't going to be right for me (too much starch, too little veg and, a very sweet dessert) I accepted the invitation and the sweet "rasmalai" - I ate moderately, sticking to one virtual plate, but the sweet was too sweet to think of as not a sweet.
Let's see what the scales and measuring tape say tomorrow!
Feeling a bit bleak. Not these figures only, wider life issues too, but it's all mixed together.
Yesterday: the fast wasn't easy, I had a mild headache from time to time. The fast ending meal was curried chicken served in bowls with the custom of take some, then take more as you need/wish, eaten with naan bread. So, I decided to make it another exempt day. Didn't eat wildly but I did think "it's an exempt day - I can have some chocolate" so I did. 4 chocolates. Then when I came home, somehow the cold porridge left from yesterday's breakfast seemed alluring and I had that too - I sort of felt I'd be better for it - the food I'd eaten was very spicy and I hoped the porridge would mop it up.
Today I feel strange - spices and my mood and my assessment of my life all connive to produce the current state. I have meditated and eaten porridge, made thicker as I'd planned, though I now feel stuffed - I wasn't truly hungry, but I wanted to be sure I get to lunch feeling OK.
I had an excellent lunch! lettuce, grated carrot and garlic vinaigrette accompanied a home-cooked burger with cheese, onion and mushrooms - that's 4 of my "5 a day" at one meal!
Failure A Farley's Rusk and nostalgia caused the initial failure - later came an invitation to dine from someone I have a soft spot for, despite guessing the food wasn't going to be right for me (too much starch, too little veg and, a very sweet dessert) I accepted the invitation and the sweet "rasmalai" - I ate moderately, sticking to one virtual plate, but the sweet was too sweet to think of as not a sweet.
Let's see what the scales and measuring tape say tomorrow!
10 stone 12 1/4 lbs Waist 38 1/4" BMI 23.9, WHtR 57.1% Body Fat 31.4%
I really have stalled on weight and waist loss. And I need to do something uncomfortable about it - I have to start refusing to eat food that doesn't fit my diet, or doesn't suit my needs, and probably upset or offend people I have been wanting to please so they would like me.
I might write a warning email first, to be nice, and to reassure on my goodwill and that the cooking is great - but I'm on a diet and can't eat their way, and their "kindness" ("Oh you've been fasting, you will want this extra sweet dessert I fixed for you") is misplaced - I mean, what better way to erase all the hard-fought-for benefits of a fast than to eat a massive meal afterwards?
Some people have very odd ideas about fasting - they think it is done to "experience hunger" or "share the experience of the starving" - No. not me, I'm doing it to LOSE WEIGHT! (And right now, I'm failing - and I am the guardian of what goes in my mouth, no-one else)
Oh, and one more thing - I have to be willing to SUFFER to get the weight off. Other people may not have to, but I'm finding that I do. It is just temporary, not forever, creating a deficit to get the weight off, then I can adopt a maintenance routine.
10:54am I've just composed and sent the email I contemplated above, so I can say "No" without causing any offence. As it happens, the food offered is also rather too starchy and spicy for me to want regularly, but that is for tackling another time.
I really have stalled on weight and waist loss. And I need to do something uncomfortable about it - I have to start refusing to eat food that doesn't fit my diet, or doesn't suit my needs, and probably upset or offend people I have been wanting to please so they would like me.
I might write a warning email first, to be nice, and to reassure on my goodwill and that the cooking is great - but I'm on a diet and can't eat their way, and their "kindness" ("Oh you've been fasting, you will want this extra sweet dessert I fixed for you") is misplaced - I mean, what better way to erase all the hard-fought-for benefits of a fast than to eat a massive meal afterwards?
Some people have very odd ideas about fasting - they think it is done to "experience hunger" or "share the experience of the starving" - No. not me, I'm doing it to LOSE WEIGHT! (And right now, I'm failing - and I am the guardian of what goes in my mouth, no-one else)
Oh, and one more thing - I have to be willing to SUFFER to get the weight off. Other people may not have to, but I'm finding that I do. It is just temporary, not forever, creating a deficit to get the weight off, then I can adopt a maintenance routine.
10:54am I've just composed and sent the email I contemplated above, so I can say "No" without causing any offence. As it happens, the food offered is also rather too starchy and spicy for me to want regularly, but that is for tackling another time.
10 stone 12 3/4 lbs Waist 38 3/4" BMI 24, WHtR 57.8%, Body Fat 32.6%
Big change in a day - I had some scary news yesterday, a looming financial crisis. I did eat a bit more than strictly needed, but I think the inflated waist is about more than how much material I put in there - some sort of stress reaction. I must look for a positive path ahead.
Big change in a day - I had some scary news yesterday, a looming financial crisis. I did eat a bit more than strictly needed, but I think the inflated waist is about more than how much material I put in there - some sort of stress reaction. I must look for a positive path ahead.
10 stone 12 3/4 lbs Waist 38 1/2" BMI 24, WHtR 57.5%, Body Fat 32%
And I'M SLIGHTLY FATTER AND THE SAME WEIGHT AS ONE MONTH AGO! Yes, despite twice-weekly fasting, that is the truth. God knows what would happen if I now stopped fasting!
I have faced some emotional onslaughts, and have more to come. If I can't lose 2 3/4lbs by Wednesday, I will clearly have failed to shed even a modest 1lb a week since I started fasting back in May.
Have I changed? Got slack? Started cheating and deceiving myself? Is there such love in me for that belly fat that I guard it so efficiently now? Or have "the rules" changed as a result of my having lost @ 12lbs already? (or more if you count back to when I maxed out pre WW at 12 stone 6lbs lightly dressed)
Whatever. The truth is important, self observation is important, a review of my goals and my reasons for them may be helpful - and new strategies may have to be incorporated. As I have lost some weight, my caloric needs will have dropped a little, and it is possible that I may have gained some small degree of heightened metabolic efficiency? No, Brad Pilon is dismissive of that - rather he suggests one starts sneaking in extra calories and "not noticing".
In my own case, the introduction of OJ with Brewer's yeast, lysine, proline and vitamin C may be a source of enough extra calories to have tipped the balance? And my little "salads won't have to sit on the plate and displace anything else as they are so good for me" mod may also have contributed (though that isn't a daily occurrence, and I actually demonstrated to myself last week I CAN fit all that on one plate without breaking No S in either the letter or the spirit of the rules)
Anyway, press on, and don't forget to smile.
8:25pm. When to eat? Can I hold out till 11, or more sensibly to sometime around 9? Though hungry I'm not in a rush, as can be seen, I am motivated to make a success of this fast.
And I'M SLIGHTLY FATTER AND THE SAME WEIGHT AS ONE MONTH AGO! Yes, despite twice-weekly fasting, that is the truth. God knows what would happen if I now stopped fasting!
I have faced some emotional onslaughts, and have more to come. If I can't lose 2 3/4lbs by Wednesday, I will clearly have failed to shed even a modest 1lb a week since I started fasting back in May.
Have I changed? Got slack? Started cheating and deceiving myself? Is there such love in me for that belly fat that I guard it so efficiently now? Or have "the rules" changed as a result of my having lost @ 12lbs already? (or more if you count back to when I maxed out pre WW at 12 stone 6lbs lightly dressed)
Whatever. The truth is important, self observation is important, a review of my goals and my reasons for them may be helpful - and new strategies may have to be incorporated. As I have lost some weight, my caloric needs will have dropped a little, and it is possible that I may have gained some small degree of heightened metabolic efficiency? No, Brad Pilon is dismissive of that - rather he suggests one starts sneaking in extra calories and "not noticing".
In my own case, the introduction of OJ with Brewer's yeast, lysine, proline and vitamin C may be a source of enough extra calories to have tipped the balance? And my little "salads won't have to sit on the plate and displace anything else as they are so good for me" mod may also have contributed (though that isn't a daily occurrence, and I actually demonstrated to myself last week I CAN fit all that on one plate without breaking No S in either the letter or the spirit of the rules)
Anyway, press on, and don't forget to smile.
8:25pm. When to eat? Can I hold out till 11, or more sensibly to sometime around 9? Though hungry I'm not in a rush, as can be seen, I am motivated to make a success of this fast.
10 stone 10 lbs Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 31%
Will this be stable?
7:06pm Breakfast was thicker porridge, but with less oats. I weighed the portion of oats I'd been making (which came out too much to fit in even my largest bowl) and it was 3oz. I had tried once to use less fluid : 2 1/2 to 1 instead of my original 3 to 1, but that still left an excess: time, I thought, to cut back on the starting quantity of oats.
@ 2 1/2 oz of oats and commensurate volume of milk and water somehow ended up being way less and very thick, but satisfying enough to keep me going from 10a.m till 4pm. (I'd been up late and was still feeling I hadn't fully processed last night's excellent fast-ending supper: 1/4lb burger, fried onions and mushrooms accompanied by lettuce and carrot salad in vinaigrette with a dab of yoghourt and boondi (little processed gram-flour pellets)
At 4 I had "lunch": steamed chicken quarter (@ 270 grams including skin and bone) with onion, carrot and new potatoes, gravy, and a lettuce side salad. That may carry me through till after my tango class (8 to 9:30) and I can decide what, if anything I need to eat then, bearing in mind my ambition to weigh the same or less tomorrow morning as I did today.
Will this be stable?
7:06pm Breakfast was thicker porridge, but with less oats. I weighed the portion of oats I'd been making (which came out too much to fit in even my largest bowl) and it was 3oz. I had tried once to use less fluid : 2 1/2 to 1 instead of my original 3 to 1, but that still left an excess: time, I thought, to cut back on the starting quantity of oats.
@ 2 1/2 oz of oats and commensurate volume of milk and water somehow ended up being way less and very thick, but satisfying enough to keep me going from 10a.m till 4pm. (I'd been up late and was still feeling I hadn't fully processed last night's excellent fast-ending supper: 1/4lb burger, fried onions and mushrooms accompanied by lettuce and carrot salad in vinaigrette with a dab of yoghourt and boondi (little processed gram-flour pellets)
At 4 I had "lunch": steamed chicken quarter (@ 270 grams including skin and bone) with onion, carrot and new potatoes, gravy, and a lettuce side salad. That may carry me through till after my tango class (8 to 9:30) and I can decide what, if anything I need to eat then, bearing in mind my ambition to weigh the same or less tomorrow morning as I did today.
10 stone 11 1/2 lbs waist 38 1/4" BMI 23.8, WHtR 57.1%, Body Fat 31.6%
The worst thing about being stuck here? WHtR equal to or greater than 57% carries the same statistical health risks as a a BMI of 30. (NHANES)
As I ate a late but modest third meal last night, around 11pm, I was thinking I could skip it, and whether I would need to do that to keep the same weight as yesterday. I don't know what I might then have weighed, but here I am again, 10 stone 11 1/2lbs. I shouldn't have to deprive myself unduly on N days to get weight loss if I'm also fasting 2 days a week.
I could swear - but I feel also a certain calm about this - I need not be shaken, or turned aside from my goals. Despite this setback, I believe I can still attain my goals, that they are worthy, desirable and that I am entitled to have that slim body I've spent the last 4 1/2 months working for. I need to reflect on the "how".
11:34 am I'm getting porridge sorted fairly well now. I use a cup to measure the oats out, @ 2 1/2 oz, a handful of sultanas and raisins, similar quantity of cashew nuts, a pinch of coarse sea salt, then 2 1/2 cups of milk and water, which all fits into a small lidded pan just perfect for one portion. Actually that comes out a little too thick, too little to fill the bowls I have. It may be, however, that making it thick is the key to having it digest slowly, so I avoid that "just eaten and I'm already hungry" thing that bothered me the first time I tried porridge for breakfast No S style (no seconds).
3644 9:29pm Pleasantly tired post yoga class. Not inclined to eat yet - so, when should I say my fast started? My last meal was from 4 pm to 5pm today, it was the second meal of the day for me. If I avoid milky drinks, go to bed early, it should be ok to eat again same time tomorrow - and then decide whether I need a second meal later on.
The worst thing about being stuck here? WHtR equal to or greater than 57% carries the same statistical health risks as a a BMI of 30. (NHANES)
As I ate a late but modest third meal last night, around 11pm, I was thinking I could skip it, and whether I would need to do that to keep the same weight as yesterday. I don't know what I might then have weighed, but here I am again, 10 stone 11 1/2lbs. I shouldn't have to deprive myself unduly on N days to get weight loss if I'm also fasting 2 days a week.
I could swear - but I feel also a certain calm about this - I need not be shaken, or turned aside from my goals. Despite this setback, I believe I can still attain my goals, that they are worthy, desirable and that I am entitled to have that slim body I've spent the last 4 1/2 months working for. I need to reflect on the "how".
11:34 am I'm getting porridge sorted fairly well now. I use a cup to measure the oats out, @ 2 1/2 oz, a handful of sultanas and raisins, similar quantity of cashew nuts, a pinch of coarse sea salt, then 2 1/2 cups of milk and water, which all fits into a small lidded pan just perfect for one portion. Actually that comes out a little too thick, too little to fill the bowls I have. It may be, however, that making it thick is the key to having it digest slowly, so I avoid that "just eaten and I'm already hungry" thing that bothered me the first time I tried porridge for breakfast No S style (no seconds).
3644 9:29pm Pleasantly tired post yoga class. Not inclined to eat yet - so, when should I say my fast started? My last meal was from 4 pm to 5pm today, it was the second meal of the day for me. If I avoid milky drinks, go to bed early, it should be ok to eat again same time tomorrow - and then decide whether I need a second meal later on.
10 stone 10 1/2 lbs Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.5%
10:02 am (British Summer Time, the board posting time is GMT) I feel hungry. I woke early, as I often do these days, but reflected on what I was thinking and feeling, and drifted back to sleep. A good dream followed, and I woke better rested with much to ponder. Part of the dream was about fasting - as I started the fast earlier, (effectively after yesterday's "lunch" even though it was eaten between 4 and 5 pm) I was somewhat hungrier than usual for this time of a fasting day.
I see I am already somewhat trimmer than the day before. Key points will be to do with what I eat, and how much, when the fast concludes. Right now, I'm thinking, go long, make it just one meal this evening, see impressive results tomorrow morning, stick to No S all Friday, with good figures to come on Saturday morning too. But that's me speaking now for my future self who may not agree with me, he gets the burden of doing all the things I am too lazy to do!
12:47 pm, feeling hungry again. I was busy early in the day, then came a short, vigorous bike ride, I know I'll go out later, I'm now thinking I don't want to wait ONE MINUTE over 24 hours to eat this afternoon!
8:03pm That was hard. I enjoyed my meal when I got it fairly well, I wish I'd had more time to savour it but minding a friend's baby meant divided attention. I notice impulses to snack - and remind myself what a good meal I just had - and I truly did. It was a fine meal! Only question, was it so fine I won't need to eat again before breakfast tomorrow?
I felt my energy get lower as the day wore on, carrying a 7-month old in a sling got rather tiring, now I'm sleepy and tempted to go with that, and wake early, hungry ahd cheerful (and with good stats!) Only thing, I'm not home yet, I have a bike ride ahead of me. Never mind, let's see how it turns out.
10:02 am (British Summer Time, the board posting time is GMT) I feel hungry. I woke early, as I often do these days, but reflected on what I was thinking and feeling, and drifted back to sleep. A good dream followed, and I woke better rested with much to ponder. Part of the dream was about fasting - as I started the fast earlier, (effectively after yesterday's "lunch" even though it was eaten between 4 and 5 pm) I was somewhat hungrier than usual for this time of a fasting day.
I see I am already somewhat trimmer than the day before. Key points will be to do with what I eat, and how much, when the fast concludes. Right now, I'm thinking, go long, make it just one meal this evening, see impressive results tomorrow morning, stick to No S all Friday, with good figures to come on Saturday morning too. But that's me speaking now for my future self who may not agree with me, he gets the burden of doing all the things I am too lazy to do!
12:47 pm, feeling hungry again. I was busy early in the day, then came a short, vigorous bike ride, I know I'll go out later, I'm now thinking I don't want to wait ONE MINUTE over 24 hours to eat this afternoon!
8:03pm That was hard. I enjoyed my meal when I got it fairly well, I wish I'd had more time to savour it but minding a friend's baby meant divided attention. I notice impulses to snack - and remind myself what a good meal I just had - and I truly did. It was a fine meal! Only question, was it so fine I won't need to eat again before breakfast tomorrow?
I felt my energy get lower as the day wore on, carrying a 7-month old in a sling got rather tiring, now I'm sleepy and tempted to go with that, and wake early, hungry ahd cheerful (and with good stats!) Only thing, I'm not home yet, I have a bike ride ahead of me. Never mind, let's see how it turns out.
10stone 10 3/4 lbs Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.8% BP wrist: 112/68 pulse 43 or biceps 121/69 pulse 51
7:24am. I slept fairly well, woke calm with some thoughts about food - not yet truly hungry, but knowing that my relationship with it is ambivalent while I have a flabby protruding gut. So I enjoy food, think about food, and wonder how to negotiate that and my need to reduce my belly fat.
Then it's up, feed the cats and time for the tape measure - and what is this? FATTER THAN YESTERDAY? and on the scales, HEAVIER THAN YESTERDAY? What is going on? I fasted for a genuine 24 hours, got a few hours of modest exercise (moderate pace walking for 1hr 20 min with a 14lb baby in a sling is definitely exercise! - plus @ 20minutes brisk cycling).
I actually missed more meals than I have ever done before - I went without 3 meals, not the usual 2! I did eat a generous meal at the end of it - 3 oz lettuce with olive oil, balsamic vinegar, garlic, salt and pepper, 275 grams of chicken (minus the skin & bones), 4 oz carrots, 3 oz onions, 3 oz fried potatoes, @ 4tbsp gravy and 2 slices of buttered white bread, followed by a cup of coffee with milk and non-caloric sweeteners.
I didn't enjoy it fully - my friend's 7-month old wanted to be interacted with, and I needed to cook and eat - he wants what I'm eating, not the pap I'm supposed to serve him - he's getting smart - distractions don't work so well as I'd hoped.
I even did my isometric exercise routine (a new month's HabitCal pushed me beyond my reluctance) - I was good wasn't I? What went wrong?
I wasn't shocked though - I guess I could feel that my body hadn't dropped much - but a GAIN? I know it isn't the first time, and the overall trend MUST reflect a consistent calorie deficit, but, short-term, it's a real pain!
Looking back over my previous postings helps to keep today in perspective. Of course the question of the day is whether these figures are anomalous (OK) or the beginning of a new trend (NOT OK)
3677 to 3687 (edits, looking over previous postings?)
7:24am. I slept fairly well, woke calm with some thoughts about food - not yet truly hungry, but knowing that my relationship with it is ambivalent while I have a flabby protruding gut. So I enjoy food, think about food, and wonder how to negotiate that and my need to reduce my belly fat.
Then it's up, feed the cats and time for the tape measure - and what is this? FATTER THAN YESTERDAY? and on the scales, HEAVIER THAN YESTERDAY? What is going on? I fasted for a genuine 24 hours, got a few hours of modest exercise (moderate pace walking for 1hr 20 min with a 14lb baby in a sling is definitely exercise! - plus @ 20minutes brisk cycling).
I actually missed more meals than I have ever done before - I went without 3 meals, not the usual 2! I did eat a generous meal at the end of it - 3 oz lettuce with olive oil, balsamic vinegar, garlic, salt and pepper, 275 grams of chicken (minus the skin & bones), 4 oz carrots, 3 oz onions, 3 oz fried potatoes, @ 4tbsp gravy and 2 slices of buttered white bread, followed by a cup of coffee with milk and non-caloric sweeteners.
I didn't enjoy it fully - my friend's 7-month old wanted to be interacted with, and I needed to cook and eat - he wants what I'm eating, not the pap I'm supposed to serve him - he's getting smart - distractions don't work so well as I'd hoped.
I even did my isometric exercise routine (a new month's HabitCal pushed me beyond my reluctance) - I was good wasn't I? What went wrong?
I wasn't shocked though - I guess I could feel that my body hadn't dropped much - but a GAIN? I know it isn't the first time, and the overall trend MUST reflect a consistent calorie deficit, but, short-term, it's a real pain!
Looking back over my previous postings helps to keep today in perspective. Of course the question of the day is whether these figures are anomalous (OK) or the beginning of a new trend (NOT OK)
3677 to 3687 (edits, looking over previous postings?)
10 stone 10 1/2 lbs Waist 38" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.7%, Body Fat 31.2%
Feels like I'm swimming against the tide here, work so hard just to stand still, never mind progress. SO back from hols so I'll have my "battles" with her hospitality to deal with once more. More work on building the positive forces in me needed. I wondered, when my yoga teacher said difficulty with twisting positions sometimes reflected the things we hold onto, perhaps that might be a route to change? I do hope so, I'm short on clever ideas today.
7:48pm - Strange news - I feel really healthy and energetic! I've been feeling this way for hours now. I've not really got the chance to do Yoga, but I did a full isometrics workout earlier on, third day in a row, and I was quick on my bike - and I feel good. (music helps me: Tiffany Page's version of "Rude Boy" on YouTube has been a real inspiration today) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxKE0IiNR30
Pancakes for breakfast, frankfurter sandwich for lunch, a spicy feast to come for supper - it WILL be fattening but I will enjoy it anyway.
Feels like I'm swimming against the tide here, work so hard just to stand still, never mind progress. SO back from hols so I'll have my "battles" with her hospitality to deal with once more. More work on building the positive forces in me needed. I wondered, when my yoga teacher said difficulty with twisting positions sometimes reflected the things we hold onto, perhaps that might be a route to change? I do hope so, I'm short on clever ideas today.
7:48pm - Strange news - I feel really healthy and energetic! I've been feeling this way for hours now. I've not really got the chance to do Yoga, but I did a full isometrics workout earlier on, third day in a row, and I was quick on my bike - and I feel good. (music helps me: Tiffany Page's version of "Rude Boy" on YouTube has been a real inspiration today) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxKE0IiNR30
Pancakes for breakfast, frankfurter sandwich for lunch, a spicy feast to come for supper - it WILL be fattening but I will enjoy it anyway.
**@10 st 10 lb Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 31%
Though I'm not at home and the scales I used aren't 100% accurate or trustworthy, the tape measure is, so I'm inclined to believe the weight as well, and have a good day. I hope I actually manage it, how I handle the emotional issues around me will be critical, as will what exercise I manage.
2:57pm Appetite for exercise continues: Yoga, then another full Bullworker session. (I had set myself the goal of doing at least 2 isometric workouts a week to keep muscle while I do intermittent fasting). Soon off to the allotment, not sure how hard I'll work, digging might be required, fine with me if it is.
How can I avoid wondering, if I fast from this evening's meal to Monday evening, can I get "back on track" and achieve 10 stone 9 for Wednesday? That might require being lighter than that on Tuesday to allow for a rebound - Wednesday isn't usually a notably light day with my current fasting pattern, it is the day before my second fast of the week.
3746
Though I'm not at home and the scales I used aren't 100% accurate or trustworthy, the tape measure is, so I'm inclined to believe the weight as well, and have a good day. I hope I actually manage it, how I handle the emotional issues around me will be critical, as will what exercise I manage.
2:57pm Appetite for exercise continues: Yoga, then another full Bullworker session. (I had set myself the goal of doing at least 2 isometric workouts a week to keep muscle while I do intermittent fasting). Soon off to the allotment, not sure how hard I'll work, digging might be required, fine with me if it is.
How can I avoid wondering, if I fast from this evening's meal to Monday evening, can I get "back on track" and achieve 10 stone 9 for Wednesday? That might require being lighter than that on Tuesday to allow for a rebound - Wednesday isn't usually a notably light day with my current fasting pattern, it is the day before my second fast of the week.
3746
10stone 12 3/4lbs Waist 38" BMI 24, WHtR 56.7%, Body Fat 30.6%
Re-examining how I feel about getting lighter. Just how conflicted am I about losing weight? "losing", being slim - what does it mean to me? I'm not tall, and my bone structure is on the light side - how much do I mind that being visible to the world? How much does eating help me avoid sorrow, anger, conflict and consequences?
Sorrow about this failure to lose weight, not No S failure - though I could get to resent the rules, especially on seconds, which often put me in socially awkward situations. It feels boorish to pile a plate when all around me are holding back, they will all have polite seconds, I seem like a greedy oaf, even though they end up actually eating more than I do.
I realise I'm not altogether pleased with how I think I'm going to look if I loose the excess waist fat. Being slight has lots of negative associations for me, I need to figure out whether being slim is really OK with me, and what I do now if it is not. I have lots of sound reasons for desiring it, but if it doesn't feel OK deep down, I think I'll keep on "failing" to shed those excess pounds.
6:05pm, I've struggled a bit today - dry, sore eyes, briefly painful hunger-pangs, modest energy level (enough for Bullworker and yoga thankfully) and the suspicion that I won't be able to lose all the weight I'd hoped to by tomorrow or Wednesday.
And I'm also thinking - "If I lost all the weight I've been aiming to (to get to the ideal Waist/height ratio for example) would I actually like the way I look? Would anybody else?" I can sometimes imagine I might like the way I'd feel - but even then - I'd have the pleasure of lightness and the freedom of it, but how will it feel to be "insubstantial"? Will I be OK with that?
Ended fast with slightly disappointing meal - and then just a sliver of cheese - would have fitted on the plate, but it was an afterthought (I'd cleaned my plate) I guess I have to call that SECONDS and the day, the month, a failure damn these narrow rules!
Re-examining how I feel about getting lighter. Just how conflicted am I about losing weight? "losing", being slim - what does it mean to me? I'm not tall, and my bone structure is on the light side - how much do I mind that being visible to the world? How much does eating help me avoid sorrow, anger, conflict and consequences?
Sorrow about this failure to lose weight, not No S failure - though I could get to resent the rules, especially on seconds, which often put me in socially awkward situations. It feels boorish to pile a plate when all around me are holding back, they will all have polite seconds, I seem like a greedy oaf, even though they end up actually eating more than I do.
I realise I'm not altogether pleased with how I think I'm going to look if I loose the excess waist fat. Being slight has lots of negative associations for me, I need to figure out whether being slim is really OK with me, and what I do now if it is not. I have lots of sound reasons for desiring it, but if it doesn't feel OK deep down, I think I'll keep on "failing" to shed those excess pounds.
6:05pm, I've struggled a bit today - dry, sore eyes, briefly painful hunger-pangs, modest energy level (enough for Bullworker and yoga thankfully) and the suspicion that I won't be able to lose all the weight I'd hoped to by tomorrow or Wednesday.
And I'm also thinking - "If I lost all the weight I've been aiming to (to get to the ideal Waist/height ratio for example) would I actually like the way I look? Would anybody else?" I can sometimes imagine I might like the way I'd feel - but even then - I'd have the pleasure of lightness and the freedom of it, but how will it feel to be "insubstantial"? Will I be OK with that?
Ended fast with slightly disappointing meal - and then just a sliver of cheese - would have fitted on the plate, but it was an afterthought (I'd cleaned my plate) I guess I have to call that SECONDS and the day, the month, a failure damn these narrow rules!
10 stone 10 3/4 lbs, Waist 37 7/8", BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.8%
10 am, no breakfast yet, but I've not only meditated, I spent 11 1/2 minutes on my ROWING MACHINE! Did 2km, burning ? calories (it says 107, but that is based on the assumption I weigh about 25 lbs more than I actually do, must look up a calculation to compensate for that) It sure is plenty of work to burn calories.
When I was fitter, I was burning about 750 calories an hour (per the concept2 computer with it's exaggerated assumptions), do that 5 times a week and there's "1lb of body fat" - didn't stick with it, not going to discuss why right now, but thing is, I had a real desire to do it this morning.
Must reflect on what I did. Supplements I take sometimes to lift energy e.g. ginseng may have helped? - I didn't have Brewer's Yeast yesterday, I did do about 40 minutes EFT on issues about why I DON'T want to lose weight or get slim. I feel patient, with a gentle increase in self-liking.
Do I want to add Rower or Aerobic Exercise to HabitCal? Premature, perhaps?
At 1:30 am the strangeness continues - I haven't eaten as much as I wanted, I came home, had OJ with brewer's yeast, lysine proline calcium ascorbate and vitamin C - watched the final hour of "the Bourne Ultimatum" and found I wanted to do my isometric exercises rather than skip a day! So I just did. What gives? I feel so well (life is still messy in many ways, yet, today this energy enthuses me.)
10 am, no breakfast yet, but I've not only meditated, I spent 11 1/2 minutes on my ROWING MACHINE! Did 2km, burning ? calories (it says 107, but that is based on the assumption I weigh about 25 lbs more than I actually do, must look up a calculation to compensate for that) It sure is plenty of work to burn calories.
When I was fitter, I was burning about 750 calories an hour (per the concept2 computer with it's exaggerated assumptions), do that 5 times a week and there's "1lb of body fat" - didn't stick with it, not going to discuss why right now, but thing is, I had a real desire to do it this morning.
Must reflect on what I did. Supplements I take sometimes to lift energy e.g. ginseng may have helped? - I didn't have Brewer's Yeast yesterday, I did do about 40 minutes EFT on issues about why I DON'T want to lose weight or get slim. I feel patient, with a gentle increase in self-liking.
Do I want to add Rower or Aerobic Exercise to HabitCal? Premature, perhaps?
At 1:30 am the strangeness continues - I haven't eaten as much as I wanted, I came home, had OJ with brewer's yeast, lysine proline calcium ascorbate and vitamin C - watched the final hour of "the Bourne Ultimatum" and found I wanted to do my isometric exercises rather than skip a day! So I just did. What gives? I feel so well (life is still messy in many ways, yet, today this energy enthuses me.)
10 stone 10 1/4 lbs Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.9%
9:59 am. Not yet eaten, sleep still only @ 6 1/2 hours a night, woke with the appetite for 1/4 hour on the rower. Feeling OK, slightly watery stomach (coffee but no food yet). Not such a brisk performance, 2,632 metres in 15 minutes, but that's partly technique, no worries, I'm mainly glad to see that I have been able to drop a little more weight and eat less while maintaining the desire to exercise, the energy is there and pushing to be expressed.
Yes, I was thinking about "slimmer me" and who that was - the person I would ideally have been had a difficult beginning not pushed me away from activity and towards comfort-eating.
My body's flaws (legs weren't growing straight) kept me from enjoying running and everything that is based on it - and parents who preferred to see me depressed and fat rather than hear my anger all connived to push me away from active outlets for my feelings, a situation which I have yet to truly reverse.
Learning Tango is one way I'm exploring to be more happily bodily, but those who can't balance comfortably on either foot can't excel. I can work on that, and I do (partly why I took up yoga classes) but it is slow going, trying for my teacher and for me. I'm not that good at remembering dance sequences either - visio-spatial thinking and memory never were my strong suit. But I love the music, and the moments when I can forget myself and float beyond my limits, what a delight.
Oh, I'm now thinking "bioenergetics" - was a way to get relief of feelings via body - and my body is a depressed body, wanting to be an angry body (and ultimately a peaceful, healthy body) - does bioenergetics still exist, I wonder, I'm out of touch with the whole therapy scene.
News - probably going to be invited to a sort of celebratory mega-meal by some Pakistani friends this evening, it will be difficult to avoid and No S it, might have to declare an S day (not that I actually want one, I am really into losing my excess body fat just now, feasting holds little appeal)
9:59 am. Not yet eaten, sleep still only @ 6 1/2 hours a night, woke with the appetite for 1/4 hour on the rower. Feeling OK, slightly watery stomach (coffee but no food yet). Not such a brisk performance, 2,632 metres in 15 minutes, but that's partly technique, no worries, I'm mainly glad to see that I have been able to drop a little more weight and eat less while maintaining the desire to exercise, the energy is there and pushing to be expressed.
Yes, I was thinking about "slimmer me" and who that was - the person I would ideally have been had a difficult beginning not pushed me away from activity and towards comfort-eating.
My body's flaws (legs weren't growing straight) kept me from enjoying running and everything that is based on it - and parents who preferred to see me depressed and fat rather than hear my anger all connived to push me away from active outlets for my feelings, a situation which I have yet to truly reverse.
Learning Tango is one way I'm exploring to be more happily bodily, but those who can't balance comfortably on either foot can't excel. I can work on that, and I do (partly why I took up yoga classes) but it is slow going, trying for my teacher and for me. I'm not that good at remembering dance sequences either - visio-spatial thinking and memory never were my strong suit. But I love the music, and the moments when I can forget myself and float beyond my limits, what a delight.
Oh, I'm now thinking "bioenergetics" - was a way to get relief of feelings via body - and my body is a depressed body, wanting to be an angry body (and ultimately a peaceful, healthy body) - does bioenergetics still exist, I wonder, I'm out of touch with the whole therapy scene.
News - probably going to be invited to a sort of celebratory mega-meal by some Pakistani friends this evening, it will be difficult to avoid and No S it, might have to declare an S day (not that I actually want one, I am really into losing my excess body fat just now, feasting holds little appeal)
10 stone 11 lbs, Waist 37 7/8", BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.7%
Strange day - up early with too little sleep, I'm fasting, yet still I was drawn to the rower, did 3,000 metres in 16 minutes. And for the first time, I used the final notch on my broad black leather belt.
Last night was a messy start to my fast: I was offered a sweet it seemed to rude to decline (presented by a long-awaited visitor from abroad who has little grasp of dieting of any sort, but from a "hospitable" culture) so I took the S day I'd been thinking I'd be obliged to use.
Went to yoga, came back and found mountains of chicken, rice, stewed lamb with carrot halwa to follow. Not my everyday fare, I had seconds but mainly because all the big plates had been used, otherwise might have one-plated it.
Went home in a rush only to discover I'd left my keys behind - so a 10 minute bike-ride became 30 minutes, and I "forgot" I was fasting today and drank 1/4pint of milk before I went to bed, a little annoying but not terminally bad.
Though I'm fasting I believe I'll still do isometrics and yoga - with some uncertainty about how my future work/fasting/exercise programme is going to pan out - I'll just have to deal with whatever comes.
9:22 pm: Day got totally messed up - tomorrow may be simpler, future still uncertain. Didn't do isometrics, or yoga, only meditated once, barely kept to No S (as I conceive it) as my post-fast meal was being offered by people who thought I needed stuffing as I'd been fasting - they just don't get the dieting thing, the restraint thing, the one plate thing.
Oh, and this was new to me - leaving the sight of snacks left lying about is a great help - not seeing them helps me not to dwell on the temptation.
The sight of cold porridge when I got home was too tempting: FAILURE, no doubt I'll pay for it but after a more demanding and stressful day than I was prepared for, I forgive myself.
Strange day - up early with too little sleep, I'm fasting, yet still I was drawn to the rower, did 3,000 metres in 16 minutes. And for the first time, I used the final notch on my broad black leather belt.
Last night was a messy start to my fast: I was offered a sweet it seemed to rude to decline (presented by a long-awaited visitor from abroad who has little grasp of dieting of any sort, but from a "hospitable" culture) so I took the S day I'd been thinking I'd be obliged to use.
Went to yoga, came back and found mountains of chicken, rice, stewed lamb with carrot halwa to follow. Not my everyday fare, I had seconds but mainly because all the big plates had been used, otherwise might have one-plated it.
Went home in a rush only to discover I'd left my keys behind - so a 10 minute bike-ride became 30 minutes, and I "forgot" I was fasting today and drank 1/4pint of milk before I went to bed, a little annoying but not terminally bad.
Though I'm fasting I believe I'll still do isometrics and yoga - with some uncertainty about how my future work/fasting/exercise programme is going to pan out - I'll just have to deal with whatever comes.
9:22 pm: Day got totally messed up - tomorrow may be simpler, future still uncertain. Didn't do isometrics, or yoga, only meditated once, barely kept to No S (as I conceive it) as my post-fast meal was being offered by people who thought I needed stuffing as I'd been fasting - they just don't get the dieting thing, the restraint thing, the one plate thing.
Oh, and this was new to me - leaving the sight of snacks left lying about is a great help - not seeing them helps me not to dwell on the temptation.
The sight of cold porridge when I got home was too tempting: FAILURE, no doubt I'll pay for it but after a more demanding and stressful day than I was prepared for, I forgive myself.
10 stone 10 1/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4", BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.6%
Yesterday was tricky, lots of unexpected stresses, so the No S failure was unfortunate, understandable and not wild. I normally have a fairly quiet schedule which suits fasting well - instead I was out and about, pulled along by other people's plans (and accidents!) and offered tempting tasty food that isn't normally around for me to consider - so, all in all, I did better than I might have, but not quite well enough. All my habitcal stats but one will be tarnished, I'll be back to one gold medal out of six.....
(actually no, I'm now at 4 gold medals and one silver, but it won't last.)
More positively - look at the interesting figures: weight loss modest, but WAIST has got slimmer. This is what I'm really aiming at anyway - I feel fitter, I'm exercising more and enjoying it, I have more energy, I have a "day off" today - it's actually looking good, despite SO (my ex?) putting me through the mincer yet again yesterday morning.
12:05 - the "day off" spirit has really taken hold. Went back to bed for a while, meditated, read, dozed. Then on the rower 18 odd minutes, 3 1/3 K - why that time/distance? Couldn't equal earlier speed, so I went for more distance or time - then I felt tired, and it was enough for today.
Bathed, cooked the porridge I'd put on to soak last night (slightly overdid the oats, so it was thicker than usual, didn't fill the bowl but it filled me - now I feel stuffed and resentful - it's that bloody "no seconds" shit again. If I didn't have "hunger later" anxiety I wouldn't put so much in my bowl, which I then really try hard to eat, even if it hurts - why is that rule so annoying and inharmonious?
Couldn't there be a better way? Why do I have to decide IN ADVANCE how much I'm going to want to eat? Why restrict myself by visual cues instead of letting my stomach and emotions tell me? I am an emotional eater; calm, I eat wisely, upset, I overdo it. I stick to No S anyway, with the anger, as the discipline is necessary to restrict post-fast compensatory eating.
Insight: I WANT TO BE FREE TO CHANGE MY MIND - without breaking my "clean your plate" "rule" dinned into me by all figures of authority during my childhood. Seconds is the perfect answer: have a little, clear your plate - a little more? OK, have that, clear plate again (two gold stars!)
I think the "no seconds" rule is the one that causes me most grief. "No sweets" was a little trying - but I've found ways round it (cooked fruit goes well with meat or poultry as part of a single platter for example.) And "No snacks"? Yes, difficult at first - and it still can be if I'm hungry AND with people who are snacking and offering. The dual pressure - not just gustatory but social, makes it harder to resist. "Who does he think he is? Snooty b****." I try to avoid being in those situations, around those sort of people - can't always manage it.
2:14pm - just checked: the jeans I'm wearing now have 34" as the waist size!. Yes, I know I'm actually just a little under 38" - but, it has taken me a long while to get to being able to wear them again
Yesterday was tricky, lots of unexpected stresses, so the No S failure was unfortunate, understandable and not wild. I normally have a fairly quiet schedule which suits fasting well - instead I was out and about, pulled along by other people's plans (and accidents!) and offered tempting tasty food that isn't normally around for me to consider - so, all in all, I did better than I might have, but not quite well enough. All my habitcal stats but one will be tarnished, I'll be back to one gold medal out of six.....
(actually no, I'm now at 4 gold medals and one silver, but it won't last.)
More positively - look at the interesting figures: weight loss modest, but WAIST has got slimmer. This is what I'm really aiming at anyway - I feel fitter, I'm exercising more and enjoying it, I have more energy, I have a "day off" today - it's actually looking good, despite SO (my ex?) putting me through the mincer yet again yesterday morning.
12:05 - the "day off" spirit has really taken hold. Went back to bed for a while, meditated, read, dozed. Then on the rower 18 odd minutes, 3 1/3 K - why that time/distance? Couldn't equal earlier speed, so I went for more distance or time - then I felt tired, and it was enough for today.
Bathed, cooked the porridge I'd put on to soak last night (slightly overdid the oats, so it was thicker than usual, didn't fill the bowl but it filled me - now I feel stuffed and resentful - it's that bloody "no seconds" shit again. If I didn't have "hunger later" anxiety I wouldn't put so much in my bowl, which I then really try hard to eat, even if it hurts - why is that rule so annoying and inharmonious?
Couldn't there be a better way? Why do I have to decide IN ADVANCE how much I'm going to want to eat? Why restrict myself by visual cues instead of letting my stomach and emotions tell me? I am an emotional eater; calm, I eat wisely, upset, I overdo it. I stick to No S anyway, with the anger, as the discipline is necessary to restrict post-fast compensatory eating.
Insight: I WANT TO BE FREE TO CHANGE MY MIND - without breaking my "clean your plate" "rule" dinned into me by all figures of authority during my childhood. Seconds is the perfect answer: have a little, clear your plate - a little more? OK, have that, clear plate again (two gold stars!)
I think the "no seconds" rule is the one that causes me most grief. "No sweets" was a little trying - but I've found ways round it (cooked fruit goes well with meat or poultry as part of a single platter for example.) And "No snacks"? Yes, difficult at first - and it still can be if I'm hungry AND with people who are snacking and offering. The dual pressure - not just gustatory but social, makes it harder to resist. "Who does he think he is? Snooty b****." I try to avoid being in those situations, around those sort of people - can't always manage it.
2:14pm - just checked: the jeans I'm wearing now have 34" as the waist size!. Yes, I know I'm actually just a little under 38" - but, it has taken me a long while to get to being able to wear them again
10 stone 12 3/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4", BMI 24, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 29.9%
3:39pm The weight hike was a surprise - not expected, cause obscure, but waist measurement reassures me nothing seriously awry with my behaviour. Rowed yet again, about 20 minutes, 3 3/4 kilometres, 200 odd calories burned (that's more than I actually burn, it's the Concept2 computer assuming I weigh 12 stone 6 lbs, which I don't)
I woke fairly well rested after yesterday's rest day BUT my back is bothering me, and I'm wondering about the yoga. I'm gettng more supple, things move that didn't move before - and though that's good in theory, maybe it isn't that good for me. Maybe a day's rest from it, then start again carefully?
I really want to stick with the yoga, it's not just an exercise system to me, but a combination of the physical and spiritual which I find very appealing. I'd be sorry to have to give it up.
3:39pm The weight hike was a surprise - not expected, cause obscure, but waist measurement reassures me nothing seriously awry with my behaviour. Rowed yet again, about 20 minutes, 3 3/4 kilometres, 200 odd calories burned (that's more than I actually burn, it's the Concept2 computer assuming I weigh 12 stone 6 lbs, which I don't)
I woke fairly well rested after yesterday's rest day BUT my back is bothering me, and I'm wondering about the yoga. I'm gettng more supple, things move that didn't move before - and though that's good in theory, maybe it isn't that good for me. Maybe a day's rest from it, then start again carefully?
I really want to stick with the yoga, it's not just an exercise system to me, but a combination of the physical and spiritual which I find very appealing. I'd be sorry to have to give it up.
10 stone 10 1/2lbs Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.8% Biceps BP 128/73 pulse 71, Wrist 106/73 pulse 65 (post "rowing" 4K)
So, weight comes, weight goes - yesterday's breakfast was light, (leftover porridge from the day before) but followed by a jam doughnut, 3 mini chocolate eggs, a few cookies washed down with a couple of coffees with real sugar in them. No lunch, as such. Evening meal - 200g skinless chicken breast fried with onion and pineapple, potatoes and carrots. Lovely. No particular restraint. (oops! forgot to say I SNACKED on nuts, raisins, sultanas and dates after the evening meal)
Rowing again today - just over 4km in @ 21 minutes. Didn't feel so much energy today. Rowing's funny for me - some days it's a blast: energising and exciting, other days a horrid burden: heavy, slow, daunting, draining.
My back was better as the day went on, I did a full Bullworker workout but no yoga. I emailed my yoga teacher for advice, and I'm reading a book about yoga.
I got quite low for a while, realising how disappointed I'd be if I had to quit yoga again (I've got into it twice before in my life, each time physical problems arose forcing me to quit it -once with my ankles and knees becoming over-loose and unstable from overdoing efforts at full lotus, the next time was my back and I never figured out what I might be doing wrong.
So, weight comes, weight goes - yesterday's breakfast was light, (leftover porridge from the day before) but followed by a jam doughnut, 3 mini chocolate eggs, a few cookies washed down with a couple of coffees with real sugar in them. No lunch, as such. Evening meal - 200g skinless chicken breast fried with onion and pineapple, potatoes and carrots. Lovely. No particular restraint. (oops! forgot to say I SNACKED on nuts, raisins, sultanas and dates after the evening meal)
Rowing again today - just over 4km in @ 21 minutes. Didn't feel so much energy today. Rowing's funny for me - some days it's a blast: energising and exciting, other days a horrid burden: heavy, slow, daunting, draining.
My back was better as the day went on, I did a full Bullworker workout but no yoga. I emailed my yoga teacher for advice, and I'm reading a book about yoga.
I got quite low for a while, realising how disappointed I'd be if I had to quit yoga again (I've got into it twice before in my life, each time physical problems arose forcing me to quit it -once with my ankles and knees becoming over-loose and unstable from overdoing efforts at full lotus, the next time was my back and I never figured out what I might be doing wrong.
10 stone 12 lbs Waist 37 7/8" BMI 23.9, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.5%
I ate a lot of After 8 mint chocolates yesterday - felt odd then, had a can of sprite and a bag of crisps to sort of balance it out....? Later ate a less peculiar evening meal, pasta with vegetables and cheese, though a bit more than I needed or truly wanted.
Fasting today. Stressed, wanting to get on, to get it over with, but issues nag me, inner turbulence, doing what I can to be well today. (remember the big picture and what waist loss is ultimately about - those furred arteries won't change on their own)
10:09 am, Bullworker workout done, then 21minutes 9 seconds to row 4,015 metres. "219 calories"
I ate a lot of After 8 mint chocolates yesterday - felt odd then, had a can of sprite and a bag of crisps to sort of balance it out....? Later ate a less peculiar evening meal, pasta with vegetables and cheese, though a bit more than I needed or truly wanted.
Fasting today. Stressed, wanting to get on, to get it over with, but issues nag me, inner turbulence, doing what I can to be well today. (remember the big picture and what waist loss is ultimately about - those furred arteries won't change on their own)
10:09 am, Bullworker workout done, then 21minutes 9 seconds to row 4,015 metres. "219 calories"
10st 10 1/2lbs, Waist 37 9/16", BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.1%, Body Fat 30%
This is interesting: I guess I should be pleased. I wasn't surprised to see the weight, the waist is definitely going in the right direction. The fast was fairly easy(@22 hours), the post-fast restraint was too. (A meal I didn't much enjoy helped there.) I didn't have extra once I got home, save a cup of milk.
Looks like my fitness has increased - BUT I have an increasingly uncomfortable lower back. The sacroiliac/rear of pelvis leading into the right leg is all twinging as I sit here writing. I'm suspecting the flaring up of an old nerve/disc problem and that is threatening the continuation of an otherwise successful regime.
Now it is just an annoyance, twinges, I'm not incapacitated - but it's getting progressively more uncomfortable - if it gets worse then it would be a problem. I noticed it particularly as I put on a heavy backpack and cycled home last night. I know the bike frame on my racer is a little too big, and the ride too hard for the poor surfaces I encounter.
The things which bother my back: First noticed the issue when carrying a friends 16lb baby in a sling. I think my isometric "squat" might be a strain though it is only for a few seconds a day. Bike riding, especially on my racer, pedalling hard but slow in a high gear. Sitting at the computer (if I slump) Slumping during meditation (I sometimes fall asleep for brief periods) And sleep - I wake with it, supine rest doesn't relieve it. And what about my ROWING? It definitely flexes the back - it is a seated forward and backward bend against resistance.
EDIT: How did I forget to mention Yoga? Too strange!
What is my strategy? I've been telling myself one thing: "If I weighed less, there'd be less strain on all my joints and some difficult things would get easier." (things like being balanced on just one foot at a time during tango) That is true, but is the means of getting there (intermittent fasting) also a problem? Am I becoming depleted? Actually, a few weeks ago I might have said "Yes", but today, with consistently better energy, I'd say "No".
That is a bit of a mystery in itself. What has changed so I am no longer depleted by fasting? I am no longer able to shift off a weight plateau, oscillating between 10 12 and 10 10, even though waist diminution tells me I must be must be shedding body fat, so, if my weight is stable, I'm either gaining glycogen/water stores, or muscle!
Well, back aside, my body feels good, I feel good - enlivened.
8:33am What do those words matter? Just "rowed" 4k - over a minute SLOWER than yesterday. 22m 27s, 2:25 split, 4,012m, "213 calories" I closed the vent to make it easier, I sensed the rower as gummy, sluggish - minor back discomfort, stayed minor, negligible but not vanished. Maybe I should oil the chain? No hasty judgement after one day. What's for breakfast?
IDEA: what if I walked to Tottenham instead of cycling? It's only 30 minutes. Oh, tonight not good for walking home: Tango class means staying late and I'd already be more exercised than usual. I'd get more exercise by walking, and my BACK might like it better?
Alternate idea: I walk my comfy, heavy mountain bike with the flat tyre to Tottenham, fix it during the day, ride it home tonight?
Speaking for now, 10:19 am Tuesday, I don't seem to be needing or wanting so much food. Why? Will it last? Hmmm. My porridge was made with just 2 oz of oatmeal and the other stuff I usually add, far less in the bowl, struggled to finish even that. Hmmm.
This is interesting: I guess I should be pleased. I wasn't surprised to see the weight, the waist is definitely going in the right direction. The fast was fairly easy(@22 hours), the post-fast restraint was too. (A meal I didn't much enjoy helped there.) I didn't have extra once I got home, save a cup of milk.
Looks like my fitness has increased - BUT I have an increasingly uncomfortable lower back. The sacroiliac/rear of pelvis leading into the right leg is all twinging as I sit here writing. I'm suspecting the flaring up of an old nerve/disc problem and that is threatening the continuation of an otherwise successful regime.
Now it is just an annoyance, twinges, I'm not incapacitated - but it's getting progressively more uncomfortable - if it gets worse then it would be a problem. I noticed it particularly as I put on a heavy backpack and cycled home last night. I know the bike frame on my racer is a little too big, and the ride too hard for the poor surfaces I encounter.
The things which bother my back: First noticed the issue when carrying a friends 16lb baby in a sling. I think my isometric "squat" might be a strain though it is only for a few seconds a day. Bike riding, especially on my racer, pedalling hard but slow in a high gear. Sitting at the computer (if I slump) Slumping during meditation (I sometimes fall asleep for brief periods) And sleep - I wake with it, supine rest doesn't relieve it. And what about my ROWING? It definitely flexes the back - it is a seated forward and backward bend against resistance.
EDIT: How did I forget to mention Yoga? Too strange!
What is my strategy? I've been telling myself one thing: "If I weighed less, there'd be less strain on all my joints and some difficult things would get easier." (things like being balanced on just one foot at a time during tango) That is true, but is the means of getting there (intermittent fasting) also a problem? Am I becoming depleted? Actually, a few weeks ago I might have said "Yes", but today, with consistently better energy, I'd say "No".
That is a bit of a mystery in itself. What has changed so I am no longer depleted by fasting? I am no longer able to shift off a weight plateau, oscillating between 10 12 and 10 10, even though waist diminution tells me I must be must be shedding body fat, so, if my weight is stable, I'm either gaining glycogen/water stores, or muscle!
Well, back aside, my body feels good, I feel good - enlivened.
8:33am What do those words matter? Just "rowed" 4k - over a minute SLOWER than yesterday. 22m 27s, 2:25 split, 4,012m, "213 calories" I closed the vent to make it easier, I sensed the rower as gummy, sluggish - minor back discomfort, stayed minor, negligible but not vanished. Maybe I should oil the chain? No hasty judgement after one day. What's for breakfast?
IDEA: what if I walked to Tottenham instead of cycling? It's only 30 minutes. Oh, tonight not good for walking home: Tango class means staying late and I'd already be more exercised than usual. I'd get more exercise by walking, and my BACK might like it better?
Alternate idea: I walk my comfy, heavy mountain bike with the flat tyre to Tottenham, fix it during the day, ride it home tonight?
Speaking for now, 10:19 am Tuesday, I don't seem to be needing or wanting so much food. Why? Will it last? Hmmm. My porridge was made with just 2 oz of oatmeal and the other stuff I usually add, far less in the bowl, struggled to finish even that. Hmmm.
10 stone 10 1/4 lbs Waist 37 3/4", BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.6%
A slightly tricky weigh-in this morning. It said 10st 9 3/4lbs, then I sort of slipped as I peered to read it and it re-set at 10st 10 1/4. Re-weighing also said 10 1/4 so I'll go with that, but how tantalising!
Again a slightly tricky evening meal - it was Pakistani food, very hot, served in a small bowl with side-serving of bread, "try it, if you like it, have more" - I thought briefly of asking for a bigger plate and making it conform to standard No S, but how boorish that would have been!
My host's English wasn't really up to understanding No S, so I "virtual plated" my meal - I did have a second bowl, with full clear intention, because one bowl was far less than I would have served myself, once I'd established that it wouldn't burn the roof of my mouth off.
As can be seen, the scales suggest I didn't overdo it yesterday. Back issues prompted a precautionary day off from Bullworker and Yoga, I still "rowed", cycled and I would have danced, had my tango class not been cancelled.
I think I may need to lower the seat slightly on my racing bike, it does seem to generate noticeable discomfort at the moment when I have to stop and rest one foot on the ground.
8:39 am. Just got off the rower, sweating, wobbly, pleased enough at my vigorous finish. 21m 22s, 4019m, 2.13 split, 223cal. And I'm procrastinating, putting off an important but unpleasant task. Damn.
Oh - I see I weigh and measure same as last Friday. So it goes.
10:03am - the porridge seemed too little today. I ate it without reaching a point of surfeit, now I'm feeling this odd post-porridge sense (not for the first time) of "I am hungry/I am not empty" Strange. Carries on for hours. If I hadn't got so fed up of fry-ups for breakfast, lunch and dinner, I would return to them - they don't lead to this sense of empty fullness - they don't lead to a sense of lack.
Perhaps the roots of this feeling lie in the unsatisfactory nature of yesterday's eating - I didn't have any meat at all, and rather less protein than I prefer - a bit too much fat and starch, not enough vegetables or fruit either.
A slightly tricky weigh-in this morning. It said 10st 9 3/4lbs, then I sort of slipped as I peered to read it and it re-set at 10st 10 1/4. Re-weighing also said 10 1/4 so I'll go with that, but how tantalising!
Again a slightly tricky evening meal - it was Pakistani food, very hot, served in a small bowl with side-serving of bread, "try it, if you like it, have more" - I thought briefly of asking for a bigger plate and making it conform to standard No S, but how boorish that would have been!
My host's English wasn't really up to understanding No S, so I "virtual plated" my meal - I did have a second bowl, with full clear intention, because one bowl was far less than I would have served myself, once I'd established that it wouldn't burn the roof of my mouth off.
As can be seen, the scales suggest I didn't overdo it yesterday. Back issues prompted a precautionary day off from Bullworker and Yoga, I still "rowed", cycled and I would have danced, had my tango class not been cancelled.
I think I may need to lower the seat slightly on my racing bike, it does seem to generate noticeable discomfort at the moment when I have to stop and rest one foot on the ground.
8:39 am. Just got off the rower, sweating, wobbly, pleased enough at my vigorous finish. 21m 22s, 4019m, 2.13 split, 223cal. And I'm procrastinating, putting off an important but unpleasant task. Damn.
Oh - I see I weigh and measure same as last Friday. So it goes.
10:03am - the porridge seemed too little today. I ate it without reaching a point of surfeit, now I'm feeling this odd post-porridge sense (not for the first time) of "I am hungry/I am not empty" Strange. Carries on for hours. If I hadn't got so fed up of fry-ups for breakfast, lunch and dinner, I would return to them - they don't lead to this sense of empty fullness - they don't lead to a sense of lack.
Perhaps the roots of this feeling lie in the unsatisfactory nature of yesterday's eating - I didn't have any meat at all, and rather less protein than I prefer - a bit too much fat and starch, not enough vegetables or fruit either.
10st 8 3/4lb, Waist 37 5/8", BMI 23.3, WHtR 56.2% Body Fat 30.6%
Finally, I'm below 10 stone 10. Looks like yesterdays 9 3/4 might have been accurate after all. I ate fairly well yesterday - though breakfast left me yearning for more, my late lunch was a joy - lean chicken, onion, pineapple, sweetcorn, carrots, potatoes. Filled my plate, filled my stomach, felt I'd really eaten well. Evening meal pasta bake with vegetables, cheese and lettuce vinaigrette. Like breakfast I felt sort of wishing there'd been a little more on my plate, but not enough to make me rebellious.
My meal finished around 10:30 (when I finished my decaf coffee) but I probably won't wait a full 24 hours to eat again. Considering what the scales say, I think any time from about 7pm would be acceptable. I'll try to savour my black tea, my sparkling spring water with added lemon juice, perhaps a coffee (but without sweeteners if possible, they seem to provoke agonising hunger pangs) and a sense of virtue.
9:40 am Rowing; 21m 08s, split 2.28, 4,020m, "218 calories"
Finally, I'm below 10 stone 10. Looks like yesterdays 9 3/4 might have been accurate after all. I ate fairly well yesterday - though breakfast left me yearning for more, my late lunch was a joy - lean chicken, onion, pineapple, sweetcorn, carrots, potatoes. Filled my plate, filled my stomach, felt I'd really eaten well. Evening meal pasta bake with vegetables, cheese and lettuce vinaigrette. Like breakfast I felt sort of wishing there'd been a little more on my plate, but not enough to make me rebellious.
My meal finished around 10:30 (when I finished my decaf coffee) but I probably won't wait a full 24 hours to eat again. Considering what the scales say, I think any time from about 7pm would be acceptable. I'll try to savour my black tea, my sparkling spring water with added lemon juice, perhaps a coffee (but without sweeteners if possible, they seem to provoke agonising hunger pangs) and a sense of virtue.
9:40 am Rowing; 21m 08s, split 2.28, 4,020m, "218 calories"
10st 10 3/4lb, Waist 37 7/8", BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.8%
Rowing: 21m 13sec, 4,020m, final split 2:15, "220 calories" Yes, even with a cold, I still wanted to do this, and managed a respectable time. Had I felt ill or strained, I would have quit for today, I'm not a fanatic.
I have a cold. Ate a solid post-fast evening meal, and a hot, milky drink with some molasses and barley malt at bed-time - but does that explain a gain of 2lbs and 1/4" on a fasting day? Of course not. My graphs show previous mystery gains and losses. I seem to be on a plateau, (I'm at the same weight and waist as 10 days ago) but my energy and exercise levels are up somewhat, and depletion was a parallel concern, which I seem to be addressing.
Apart from the cold, I actually feel pretty good! My body feels enjoyably alive, I think all the exercise I do is changing me.
Finally I'll figure out how to have the waist I want AND be really fit and healthy, if I have time to do it. (yes, the clock ticks, and the threat of CHD or stroke is a statistical reality for the overwaist, and I am STILL seriously overwaist after all these months. Must stay focused on where I want to get to.
Rowing: 21m 13sec, 4,020m, final split 2:15, "220 calories" Yes, even with a cold, I still wanted to do this, and managed a respectable time. Had I felt ill or strained, I would have quit for today, I'm not a fanatic.
I have a cold. Ate a solid post-fast evening meal, and a hot, milky drink with some molasses and barley malt at bed-time - but does that explain a gain of 2lbs and 1/4" on a fasting day? Of course not. My graphs show previous mystery gains and losses. I seem to be on a plateau, (I'm at the same weight and waist as 10 days ago) but my energy and exercise levels are up somewhat, and depletion was a parallel concern, which I seem to be addressing.
Apart from the cold, I actually feel pretty good! My body feels enjoyably alive, I think all the exercise I do is changing me.
Finally I'll figure out how to have the waist I want AND be really fit and healthy, if I have time to do it. (yes, the clock ticks, and the threat of CHD or stroke is a statistical reality for the overwaist, and I am STILL seriously overwaist after all these months. Must stay focused on where I want to get to.
10 stone 9 1/2 lbs, Waist 37 5/8", BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.2%, Body Fat 30.4%
Despite my cold (fairly mild anyway) I did my whole fitness regime yesterday, nearly everything on my HabitCal - and sent off a dreaded email. It will have consequences, but some uncertainty will be gone from my life, hopefully not replaced by injustice.
And it's an S day, but I don't want to to be so naughty that I cry on Monday.
8:45am Rowing: 20 min 31 sec, 4,018metres, "222 calories" Figures don't show how often I stopped in that time. I found myself starting very quickly, and getting breathless, having to take pauses, more like interval training, nauseous, but overall quickest to date. Didn't want to row a metre further by the end!
Despite my cold (fairly mild anyway) I did my whole fitness regime yesterday, nearly everything on my HabitCal - and sent off a dreaded email. It will have consequences, but some uncertainty will be gone from my life, hopefully not replaced by injustice.
And it's an S day, but I don't want to to be so naughty that I cry on Monday.
8:45am Rowing: 20 min 31 sec, 4,018metres, "222 calories" Figures don't show how often I stopped in that time. I found myself starting very quickly, and getting breathless, having to take pauses, more like interval training, nauseous, but overall quickest to date. Didn't want to row a metre further by the end!
10 stone 9 3/4 lbs, Waist 37 1/2", BMI 23.5, WHtR 56%, Body Fat 30%
11:22 am Rowing: 20min 52sec, 2m 17sec final split, 4,014metres, "220 calories"
Interesting evolution here: plateau with depletion, then plateau with energy, then energy with exercise, is this the end of the plateau? Even if it is, it will only be till my habits bring me to a new equilibrium, when I'll plateau again.
Key point: Though I'm in some senses in good health, fitter in certain ways than for many years, perhaps ever, I remain massively overwaist. My reading leads me to believe that visceral fat and arterial narrowing are paired phenomena, and reducing the one I can measure should see a parallel reduction in it's clandestine companion.
This may be a time to enjoy, to savour, yet without losing that sense of the urgency of my enterprise, not to slacken my efforts, keeping in unwavering view the ultimate importance of attaining my goals.
11:22 am Rowing: 20min 52sec, 2m 17sec final split, 4,014metres, "220 calories"
Interesting evolution here: plateau with depletion, then plateau with energy, then energy with exercise, is this the end of the plateau? Even if it is, it will only be till my habits bring me to a new equilibrium, when I'll plateau again.
Key point: Though I'm in some senses in good health, fitter in certain ways than for many years, perhaps ever, I remain massively overwaist. My reading leads me to believe that visceral fat and arterial narrowing are paired phenomena, and reducing the one I can measure should see a parallel reduction in it's clandestine companion.
This may be a time to enjoy, to savour, yet without losing that sense of the urgency of my enterprise, not to slacken my efforts, keeping in unwavering view the ultimate importance of attaining my goals.
10 stone 10 1/4 lbs, Waist 37 1/4", BMI 23.6, WHtR 55.6% Body Fat 29.2%
Rowing: 21min 5sec, 4018 metres, "215 calories" (getting weary of Ronin - but what to replace it? Top Gun! great choice - but I was still sluggish)
10:28 am. I feel low today. Fasting - again feeling slightly like I don't want to do it, something is bothering me, not necessarily the fasting, but there's something I'm not understanding. Waist looking good - and there I am in the middle of glad/uneasy, troubled etc. Stuff to do, more later perhaps.
Rowing: 21min 5sec, 4018 metres, "215 calories" (getting weary of Ronin - but what to replace it? Top Gun! great choice - but I was still sluggish)
10:28 am. I feel low today. Fasting - again feeling slightly like I don't want to do it, something is bothering me, not necessarily the fasting, but there's something I'm not understanding. Waist looking good - and there I am in the middle of glad/uneasy, troubled etc. Stuff to do, more later perhaps.
10 stone 9 1/2 lbs, Waist 37 1/2", BMI 23.5, WHtR 56%, Body Fat 30.1%
10:20 am, Rowing: 20min 16sec, 4,014 metres, 2:17 final split, "215 calories"
My chest still bothersome since my cold last week, gets heavy/dispirited feeling if I get too quick too soon. Is it lungs? Or heart? Whatever, I sensed myself hitting the limiter today. Otherwise OK, Top Gun works as a backdrop - the aerial combat sequences particularly.
Fortuitous TV-watching showed an air ambulance at work, several cardiac arrests, one was a slim, fit-looking golfer about my age, reminded me why I'm putting in the effort, and also a darker truth - even after you do everything right, there's still a joker in the pack. I must consider what matters and what my time is for, what use to make of it, while around me is a swirl of contradictory ideas and values. I must find clarity.
10:20 am, Rowing: 20min 16sec, 4,014 metres, 2:17 final split, "215 calories"
My chest still bothersome since my cold last week, gets heavy/dispirited feeling if I get too quick too soon. Is it lungs? Or heart? Whatever, I sensed myself hitting the limiter today. Otherwise OK, Top Gun works as a backdrop - the aerial combat sequences particularly.
Fortuitous TV-watching showed an air ambulance at work, several cardiac arrests, one was a slim, fit-looking golfer about my age, reminded me why I'm putting in the effort, and also a darker truth - even after you do everything right, there's still a joker in the pack. I must consider what matters and what my time is for, what use to make of it, while around me is a swirl of contradictory ideas and values. I must find clarity.
Last edited by Graham on Fri Sep 24, 2010 12:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
10 stone 9 1/2 lbs, Waist 37 7/8", BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 31.1%
So! Bloat! Main odd thing last night: finally persuaded to try a local choir (Tango classes being suspended for the time being), I was also persuaded to go to a pub afterwards, where I drank a pint of cider (239 calories - more than my 20 minutes rowing can burn!) and mixed with lots of people smoking! I can't do that long term.
Even after 5 years I'm still tempted, tobacco is such shit! Pox on the manufacturers, greedy cynical bastards the lot of them! And pox on governments without the guts to ban the manufacture and sale of this noxious, addictive, slow killer. Gutless crowd-pleasers!
8:59am Rowing: 19min 53sec 2:11 final split, 4016 metres forgot calories! (too late, erased after 3 minutes static)
So! Bloat! Main odd thing last night: finally persuaded to try a local choir (Tango classes being suspended for the time being), I was also persuaded to go to a pub afterwards, where I drank a pint of cider (239 calories - more than my 20 minutes rowing can burn!) and mixed with lots of people smoking! I can't do that long term.
Even after 5 years I'm still tempted, tobacco is such shit! Pox on the manufacturers, greedy cynical bastards the lot of them! And pox on governments without the guts to ban the manufacture and sale of this noxious, addictive, slow killer. Gutless crowd-pleasers!
8:59am Rowing: 19min 53sec 2:11 final split, 4016 metres forgot calories! (too late, erased after 3 minutes static)
10stone 10 1/4llbs, Waist 37 3/4", BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.6%
Damn No S "no seconds" rule. The one I hate the most. The one that grates the most. No sweets and no snacks are easier to follow (No sweets can be tricky - stewed apple with cream - it could be a dessert, but it's no sweeter than the apples make it (no added sugar if the apple is ripe) - so that should be ok yes?) But no seconds, the whole "one plate" thing: revolting!
I stick to one plate, that is easy - but I sometimes don't know how much I want/need till I've started eating, then I might think "I wish I'd put more on my plate, this won't be enough" or, I pile my plate with more than I think I want and find it was actually enough, or still not enough, but I stop because it's one plate and I can handle the clarity, even if I'm still hungry at the end of the meal, but it irritates the hell out of me.
And I don't believe "no seconds" is "the way our ancestors ate" for one minute. I think they ate what they could, but were far more physically active, and their food wasn't so rich or so plentiful - they were limited by life, not by any "one plate/no seconds" custom. And go yet further back and you're into hunter-gatherer times, and they would have had feasts, and famines, and would have been opportunistic eaters - perma-snacking when it was appropriate - when there was fruit around, for example - why wait for "meal time"?
Anyway, I'm the one who has to live with whatever I put on my HabitCal, but I wish it was a less annoying rule.
Rowing: 20min 49sec, split 2:18, 4,017 metres, "219 calories"
Fasting today.
7:04pm, a demanding fast. I slightly went wrong - early this morning I had coffee with milk in it, but otherwise it's been the standard black tea or fizzy water with lemon all day long. Exercise-wise I've rowed 20 minutes, and cycled about 30 minutes, with at least another 10 minutes to do later. Been out and about, a bit stressed, managed a nap too - very nice (I was up very early today). A last minute change of plan means my eating will be delayed, I'm not sure when I'll get to eat - might not be till about 8pm. That would be ok, I ate around 8:30 last night, it would be good. (do I have time and inner resources to do my strength training tonight?)
The meal offered was messy: soup, bread, scrambled eggs, vegetables, couscous - well, post-fast I just "forgot" to monitor how many slices of bread i had, so I thought "that's a fail day then" and ate the scrambled eggs, stomach hurting from excess bread, went home and snacked on raisins and then cashew nuts. Did enjoy them, but failure gets me down, seems harsh - after a day without food.
Damn No S "no seconds" rule. The one I hate the most. The one that grates the most. No sweets and no snacks are easier to follow (No sweets can be tricky - stewed apple with cream - it could be a dessert, but it's no sweeter than the apples make it (no added sugar if the apple is ripe) - so that should be ok yes?) But no seconds, the whole "one plate" thing: revolting!
I stick to one plate, that is easy - but I sometimes don't know how much I want/need till I've started eating, then I might think "I wish I'd put more on my plate, this won't be enough" or, I pile my plate with more than I think I want and find it was actually enough, or still not enough, but I stop because it's one plate and I can handle the clarity, even if I'm still hungry at the end of the meal, but it irritates the hell out of me.
And I don't believe "no seconds" is "the way our ancestors ate" for one minute. I think they ate what they could, but were far more physically active, and their food wasn't so rich or so plentiful - they were limited by life, not by any "one plate/no seconds" custom. And go yet further back and you're into hunter-gatherer times, and they would have had feasts, and famines, and would have been opportunistic eaters - perma-snacking when it was appropriate - when there was fruit around, for example - why wait for "meal time"?
Anyway, I'm the one who has to live with whatever I put on my HabitCal, but I wish it was a less annoying rule.
Rowing: 20min 49sec, split 2:18, 4,017 metres, "219 calories"
Fasting today.
7:04pm, a demanding fast. I slightly went wrong - early this morning I had coffee with milk in it, but otherwise it's been the standard black tea or fizzy water with lemon all day long. Exercise-wise I've rowed 20 minutes, and cycled about 30 minutes, with at least another 10 minutes to do later. Been out and about, a bit stressed, managed a nap too - very nice (I was up very early today). A last minute change of plan means my eating will be delayed, I'm not sure when I'll get to eat - might not be till about 8pm. That would be ok, I ate around 8:30 last night, it would be good. (do I have time and inner resources to do my strength training tonight?)
The meal offered was messy: soup, bread, scrambled eggs, vegetables, couscous - well, post-fast I just "forgot" to monitor how many slices of bread i had, so I thought "that's a fail day then" and ate the scrambled eggs, stomach hurting from excess bread, went home and snacked on raisins and then cashew nuts. Did enjoy them, but failure gets me down, seems harsh - after a day without food.
10 stone 8 lbs, Waist 37 1/4", BMI 23.2, WHtR 55.6%, Body Fat 29.8%
BP Wrist 99/75 pulse 55, or BP Biceps cuff: 125/75 pulse 58. Incomprehensible divergence of measurements - re-testing biceps cuff 120/75 pulse 58. Could go on re-measuring all day, but I won't.
So, even after last night's No-S rules-busting meal, I've touched a new lowest weight. I am thirsty, perhaps a little dehydrated, so the figures may be falsely flattering, lets see how the next few days look.
10:44 row 20m 18 sec 4033 metres 2/18split 222 calories
And another day ends in FAILURE. In the evening at S/O's, I went and got fish and chips, to be shared, I filled my plate, then picked at the excess from the wrapper. Seeing I'd failed made it easier to accept the stewed apple and cream dessert - which was definitely beyond one plate, and sort of seconds, though not officially a sweet as it was mainly fruit. I stuffed myself - but I'd had messed up day, I had no chance for lunch, so I didn't actually have excessive calories, see my weight for Saturday (when I am writing this) though my waist is telling a different story.
I do resent what she is doing - the steady drip drip of subversion till I give up and hate myself for it. No doubt with her innocently saying "what did I do? You make your own decisions". These aren't the friendly actions they seem, they are the blinkered actions of someone living out a set of rigid, inappropriately applied "rules" on eating, possibly with little conscious awareness of the ultimately hostile nature of destroying someone else's success.
Hmm that seems a little unfair - she just can't get on board with me dieting, so she doesn't want to engage with it, it's my problem, not hers, she acts like she does, but I have, it seems, to "hurt her feelings" to stick to No S which makes it harder than when I cater for myself which would again hurt her feelings - No win for me.
BP Wrist 99/75 pulse 55, or BP Biceps cuff: 125/75 pulse 58. Incomprehensible divergence of measurements - re-testing biceps cuff 120/75 pulse 58. Could go on re-measuring all day, but I won't.
So, even after last night's No-S rules-busting meal, I've touched a new lowest weight. I am thirsty, perhaps a little dehydrated, so the figures may be falsely flattering, lets see how the next few days look.
10:44 row 20m 18 sec 4033 metres 2/18split 222 calories
And another day ends in FAILURE. In the evening at S/O's, I went and got fish and chips, to be shared, I filled my plate, then picked at the excess from the wrapper. Seeing I'd failed made it easier to accept the stewed apple and cream dessert - which was definitely beyond one plate, and sort of seconds, though not officially a sweet as it was mainly fruit. I stuffed myself - but I'd had messed up day, I had no chance for lunch, so I didn't actually have excessive calories, see my weight for Saturday (when I am writing this) though my waist is telling a different story.
I do resent what she is doing - the steady drip drip of subversion till I give up and hate myself for it. No doubt with her innocently saying "what did I do? You make your own decisions". These aren't the friendly actions they seem, they are the blinkered actions of someone living out a set of rigid, inappropriately applied "rules" on eating, possibly with little conscious awareness of the ultimately hostile nature of destroying someone else's success.
Hmm that seems a little unfair - she just can't get on board with me dieting, so she doesn't want to engage with it, it's my problem, not hers, she acts like she does, but I have, it seems, to "hurt her feelings" to stick to No S which makes it harder than when I cater for myself which would again hurt her feelings - No win for me.
10 stone 7 3/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4", BMI 23.2, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 31.2%
I still feel stuffed from last night, and also tense. Skipped lunch means the evening excess wasn't a total disaster. Balancing IF with No S and my S/O's hospitality remains a big headache, with lots of unstated emotional pressure that I react to, feeling dumb and bad and miserable. I may be losing weight but I still feel like a bit of a loser today - S/O is defeating me, all the while denying there is any such thing going on.
I still feel stuffed from last night, and also tense. Skipped lunch means the evening excess wasn't a total disaster. Balancing IF with No S and my S/O's hospitality remains a big headache, with lots of unstated emotional pressure that I react to, feeling dumb and bad and miserable. I may be losing weight but I still feel like a bit of a loser today - S/O is defeating me, all the while denying there is any such thing going on.
10 stone 8 1/4 lbs, Waist 37 1/8", BMI 23.3, WHtR 55.4%, Body Fat 29.3%
Yesterday was a write-off. Stomach bug on a chilly day kept me home. Didn't eat much or exercise apart from yoga, didn't even meditate - not much sense in skipping that, but I just didn't do it. I am at my slimmest, but since I had a bug I don't necessarily expect it to last.
Did some extra relaxation/healing techniques, which were pretty good. Slept well last night, I'm ready to have a better day today, but now my chest is congested - what's that about?
2:03pm Rowing: 20 min 21 sec, 2:17 final split, 4,019 metres, "221 calories"
6:29pm A day going moderately well, still no meditation, but strength training done, some cycling, some enjoyable food, 3 of my 5-a-day consumed. I may get chocolate later, and I've decided I'm not going to stop eating till I'm good and ready this evening, even till midnight. My fast will start whenever feels comfortable. I'm doing fairly well with waist and weight now I'm "rowing" regularly - just 4 kilometres in around 20 minutes has proved surprisingly effective.
Yesterday was a write-off. Stomach bug on a chilly day kept me home. Didn't eat much or exercise apart from yoga, didn't even meditate - not much sense in skipping that, but I just didn't do it. I am at my slimmest, but since I had a bug I don't necessarily expect it to last.
Did some extra relaxation/healing techniques, which were pretty good. Slept well last night, I'm ready to have a better day today, but now my chest is congested - what's that about?
2:03pm Rowing: 20 min 21 sec, 2:17 final split, 4,019 metres, "221 calories"
6:29pm A day going moderately well, still no meditation, but strength training done, some cycling, some enjoyable food, 3 of my 5-a-day consumed. I may get chocolate later, and I've decided I'm not going to stop eating till I'm good and ready this evening, even till midnight. My fast will start whenever feels comfortable. I'm doing fairly well with waist and weight now I'm "rowing" regularly - just 4 kilometres in around 20 minutes has proved surprisingly effective.
10 st 11 lbs waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.7 WHtR 56.3% Body Fat 30.4%
setback city once again
Rowed: 21min 23sec final split 2min 27sec 4.015 metres, "216 calories". A sluggish performance, my chest was feeling heavy/congested and even achey when I got near the end. Not my best day - but 20 minutes/4k is virtually always doable, no matter how fit I feel.
setback city once again
Rowed: 21min 23sec final split 2min 27sec 4.015 metres, "216 calories". A sluggish performance, my chest was feeling heavy/congested and even achey when I got near the end. Not my best day - but 20 minutes/4k is virtually always doable, no matter how fit I feel.
10 stone 9 3/4lb, Waist 37 1/2" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56%, Body Fat 30%
Fasting went OK yesterday, the evening meal was, with virtual plating, (soup in a bowl, sausages and onions and buttered bread on a plate) large but a No S success - I was too full for dessert! (stewed apple with cream, I wouldn't have turned it down if it had fitted on my virtual plate, it isn't a "sweet", nor a snack, nor seconds provided I left space for it on my virtual plate. By the way, who is to say how big my virtual plate is? It could be infinite!
Rowing: 20min 43sec, 2m 13sec final split, 4,020 metres, "217 calories"
My chest felt strange before I started, wondered what it was, did a little EFT on it, then got on the rower, all went fine. Not my fastest, I was slow, got quicker as the minutes went by.
I am wondering though, how long can I use "Top Gun" as a backdrop? I can see it has far less mileage than "Ronin" - it is childish by comparison. It has some stimulating aerial combat sequences with a good soundtrack, some depth to it - but it ultimately rests on inadequately examined values and attitudes." Ronin" in contrast, owns it's own darkness and moral ambiguity, embracing and exploring it. (so I think today, at any rate) Afterthought: Ronin is a more adult experience - the script and the acting both offer a more demanding and satisfying experience, yet combined with some of the best car chases and action sequences ever filmed.
What I'm wanting is a stimulating sensory experience that promotes my rowing efforts, makes the time fly by, energising and encouraging me, keeping dark introspection at bay. I don't seem to have much in my collected videos and CD's that will serve. Music hasn't been the answer in the past, it still leaves me too free to focus on some very unsatisfactory areas of my life, and that gets me so angry I can't row.
My environment (my VERY MESSY flat) is an issue. I try not to let it be, but I do finally notice, both the kitchen and the living room (where my rower is) both affect my mood and my activities. The kitchen mess discourages proper cooking and eating. That, in part, is how I ended up sitting at my PC eating a huge tub of coconut cream coated peanuts instead of cooking and eating decent meals on Sunday. It felt a bit sad, and bad - and the weight-hike on Monday seemed to endorse that mood, pushing me even lower.
Monday's fast helped me feel a bit less messed up (I just can't eat 200g of crunchy coated peanuts at once and feel OK)
Fasting went OK yesterday, the evening meal was, with virtual plating, (soup in a bowl, sausages and onions and buttered bread on a plate) large but a No S success - I was too full for dessert! (stewed apple with cream, I wouldn't have turned it down if it had fitted on my virtual plate, it isn't a "sweet", nor a snack, nor seconds provided I left space for it on my virtual plate. By the way, who is to say how big my virtual plate is? It could be infinite!
Rowing: 20min 43sec, 2m 13sec final split, 4,020 metres, "217 calories"
My chest felt strange before I started, wondered what it was, did a little EFT on it, then got on the rower, all went fine. Not my fastest, I was slow, got quicker as the minutes went by.
I am wondering though, how long can I use "Top Gun" as a backdrop? I can see it has far less mileage than "Ronin" - it is childish by comparison. It has some stimulating aerial combat sequences with a good soundtrack, some depth to it - but it ultimately rests on inadequately examined values and attitudes." Ronin" in contrast, owns it's own darkness and moral ambiguity, embracing and exploring it. (so I think today, at any rate) Afterthought: Ronin is a more adult experience - the script and the acting both offer a more demanding and satisfying experience, yet combined with some of the best car chases and action sequences ever filmed.
What I'm wanting is a stimulating sensory experience that promotes my rowing efforts, makes the time fly by, energising and encouraging me, keeping dark introspection at bay. I don't seem to have much in my collected videos and CD's that will serve. Music hasn't been the answer in the past, it still leaves me too free to focus on some very unsatisfactory areas of my life, and that gets me so angry I can't row.
My environment (my VERY MESSY flat) is an issue. I try not to let it be, but I do finally notice, both the kitchen and the living room (where my rower is) both affect my mood and my activities. The kitchen mess discourages proper cooking and eating. That, in part, is how I ended up sitting at my PC eating a huge tub of coconut cream coated peanuts instead of cooking and eating decent meals on Sunday. It felt a bit sad, and bad - and the weight-hike on Monday seemed to endorse that mood, pushing me even lower.
Monday's fast helped me feel a bit less messed up (I just can't eat 200g of crunchy coated peanuts at once and feel OK)
10 stone 10 lbs, Waist 37 1/2", BMI 23.5, WHtR 56%, Body Fat 29.9%
10:04 am, Rowing 20min 30sec, final split 2min 14sec, 4,020 metres, "219 calories" - and I pondered going longer. Chest an issue again. Once again in a smoking area of a pub socialising, is that affecting me? Lets see how my chest is tomorrow.
So, no point thinking I was "under 10 stone 10 at last" - premature optimism, I need to work more on resistance to this change and any surrounding emotions. Not giving up, but a little frustrated.
Tango class and milonga start again this Thursday, so I have to switch Fast II to Friday once more. I'd hoped to be cutting a trimmer figure by now - my dancing certainly won't be any better!. Damn.
10:04 am, Rowing 20min 30sec, final split 2min 14sec, 4,020 metres, "219 calories" - and I pondered going longer. Chest an issue again. Once again in a smoking area of a pub socialising, is that affecting me? Lets see how my chest is tomorrow.
So, no point thinking I was "under 10 stone 10 at last" - premature optimism, I need to work more on resistance to this change and any surrounding emotions. Not giving up, but a little frustrated.
Tango class and milonga start again this Thursday, so I have to switch Fast II to Friday once more. I'd hoped to be cutting a trimmer figure by now - my dancing certainly won't be any better!. Damn.
10st 9 3/4lb Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.3% Body Fat 30.7%
strange - must've forgotten to push the submit button, here I am writing again - wrote loads, no time now. What's going on? FATTER WAIST though slight drop in weight. Nothing unusual about my eating - I don't mind being hungry before a meal, I won't eat so little I still feel hungry after the meal
Rowing 20min 17 sec, 4,020 metres, 221 calories, final split 2m 14 sec.
So: am I doing it right and doing enough?
I absent-mindedly put a small teaspoon of jam in my mouth after my breakfast - it was a sweet and a snack - so the day was a FAILURE! How odd it was - I realised almost as soon as I'd done it - I was so surprised at myself!. Tip to self : don't leave things to eat out on the table after the meal - wouldn't have done it if the table had been clear.
And I did it also because I was hungry frequently during the day, with the right consequences this time.
strange - must've forgotten to push the submit button, here I am writing again - wrote loads, no time now. What's going on? FATTER WAIST though slight drop in weight. Nothing unusual about my eating - I don't mind being hungry before a meal, I won't eat so little I still feel hungry after the meal
Rowing 20min 17 sec, 4,020 metres, 221 calories, final split 2m 14 sec.
So: am I doing it right and doing enough?
I absent-mindedly put a small teaspoon of jam in my mouth after my breakfast - it was a sweet and a snack - so the day was a FAILURE! How odd it was - I realised almost as soon as I'd done it - I was so surprised at myself!. Tip to self : don't leave things to eat out on the table after the meal - wouldn't have done it if the table had been clear.
And I did it also because I was hungry frequently during the day, with the right consequences this time.
10st 8 1/2lb, Waist 37 1/4", BMI 23.3, WHtR 55.6%, Body Fat 29.6%
Busier than usual day yesterday, hungry before lunch, and before supper, more than usual activity - and a result I'd've been disappointed not to see. Now I will fast on top of that, with slight feeling of reluctance and sorrow. It is a bleak day, grey, windy, chilly.
Rowing: 19 min 52 sec, final split 2min 13sec, 4,022 metres, "221 calories"
2:57pm. Hungry, but I can bear it. Only 3 more hours or so and I can EAT! (and by then I may not care.). Mood-wise, I have been fine. I have to look beyond today, keeping focused on those goals, be they ever so distant.
And I wondered this: are No S fail days associated with more biting/effective fasts?
A new month means HabitCal starts again. External factors are making compliance difficult. I have done a Bullworker session, and rowed, travelled by bike - only 10 minute ride though, nothing major.
If I was back at my old job with a 40 minute ride each way, could I fast a whole day and do those journeys? I can hardly believe it - not sure I could even No-S it! My current routine is PERFECT for my No-S/ESE strategy - so physically easy.
Getting back on track with Meditation and Yoga is not proving so easy today.
Busier than usual day yesterday, hungry before lunch, and before supper, more than usual activity - and a result I'd've been disappointed not to see. Now I will fast on top of that, with slight feeling of reluctance and sorrow. It is a bleak day, grey, windy, chilly.
Rowing: 19 min 52 sec, final split 2min 13sec, 4,022 metres, "221 calories"
2:57pm. Hungry, but I can bear it. Only 3 more hours or so and I can EAT! (and by then I may not care.). Mood-wise, I have been fine. I have to look beyond today, keeping focused on those goals, be they ever so distant.
And I wondered this: are No S fail days associated with more biting/effective fasts?
A new month means HabitCal starts again. External factors are making compliance difficult. I have done a Bullworker session, and rowed, travelled by bike - only 10 minute ride though, nothing major.
If I was back at my old job with a 40 minute ride each way, could I fast a whole day and do those journeys? I can hardly believe it - not sure I could even No-S it! My current routine is PERFECT for my No-S/ESE strategy - so physically easy.
Getting back on track with Meditation and Yoga is not proving so easy today.
10st 8 1/2lb, Waist 37 1/8", BMI 23.3, WHtR 55.4%, Body Fat 29.3%
Rowing: 21min 19sec, final split 2min 15sec 4,197 metres, "234 calories"
A fast with no weight lost? Seen it before. Waist down 1/8" - but it only brings me back to last week's position. And how I exercise and eat this weekend will determine my starting point on Monday.
Last night's meal was another tricky one - social event, Pakistani cuisine served in little bowls with second, third and fourth helpings the norm - very spicy chickpeas with very spicy potatoes, yoghourt and pitta bread. I did my best to stick to my virtual plate. I can't say where I was exactly but after a day of fasting, I believe I behaved moderately and with integrity (was offered fruit dessert, and cheese, turned them both down) and I'm calling it a No S SUCCESS
12:16pm I am hungry today. Had to go out for cat-food before my breakfast (too guilty otherwise) (but after rowing, a few biscuits (aka cookies) and a ripe and tasty pear from my own little tree!!). Other chores. Then back for bacon, mushroom and egg, and a stack of biscuits (cookies) and coffee but I'm still hungry, and eating biscuits like I'll never be able to stop. I hope I'm in sufficient calorie deficit to justify my appetite.
12:35 Oh dear! I am still hungry, and a little weak, wobbly and light-headed, as though my blood sugar were low. Very odd. I have further errands to run, and I will go and do them, but I'm not too chuffed to be feeling this way.
A new month is time for an overview:
Weight loss is probably only about 1/2lb a week now. I am still finding fasting days hard, and I get very tired after my post-fast meal* I am rowing 20 mins/4K and finding I don't yet feel much inclination to increase it. I did a little extra today, and really did NOT want to do more.
So, if I'm not going to up the exercise, or my fasting routine (perish the thought of doing more!), it's all down to No S compliance AND how wild I go on S days.
*This rather points to the difficulty of eating that meal at SO's instead of at home. On the other hand, I get food cooked for me (I help cook or make salads sometimes, and wash dishes) in a nice clean kitchen, with none of the clutter I am confronted by at home, and that is worth a lot, I do see that.
Rowing: 21min 19sec, final split 2min 15sec 4,197 metres, "234 calories"
A fast with no weight lost? Seen it before. Waist down 1/8" - but it only brings me back to last week's position. And how I exercise and eat this weekend will determine my starting point on Monday.
Last night's meal was another tricky one - social event, Pakistani cuisine served in little bowls with second, third and fourth helpings the norm - very spicy chickpeas with very spicy potatoes, yoghourt and pitta bread. I did my best to stick to my virtual plate. I can't say where I was exactly but after a day of fasting, I believe I behaved moderately and with integrity (was offered fruit dessert, and cheese, turned them both down) and I'm calling it a No S SUCCESS
12:16pm I am hungry today. Had to go out for cat-food before my breakfast (too guilty otherwise) (but after rowing, a few biscuits (aka cookies) and a ripe and tasty pear from my own little tree!!). Other chores. Then back for bacon, mushroom and egg, and a stack of biscuits (cookies) and coffee but I'm still hungry, and eating biscuits like I'll never be able to stop. I hope I'm in sufficient calorie deficit to justify my appetite.
12:35 Oh dear! I am still hungry, and a little weak, wobbly and light-headed, as though my blood sugar were low. Very odd. I have further errands to run, and I will go and do them, but I'm not too chuffed to be feeling this way.
A new month is time for an overview:
Weight loss is probably only about 1/2lb a week now. I am still finding fasting days hard, and I get very tired after my post-fast meal* I am rowing 20 mins/4K and finding I don't yet feel much inclination to increase it. I did a little extra today, and really did NOT want to do more.
So, if I'm not going to up the exercise, or my fasting routine (perish the thought of doing more!), it's all down to No S compliance AND how wild I go on S days.
*This rather points to the difficulty of eating that meal at SO's instead of at home. On the other hand, I get food cooked for me (I help cook or make salads sometimes, and wash dishes) in a nice clean kitchen, with none of the clutter I am confronted by at home, and that is worth a lot, I do see that.
10 stone 9 3/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.3% Body Fat 30.7%
I am so bored with same figure revisits ad infinitum
Theoretical proposition: the amount I can gain on a weekend is now equal to the amount I can lose with 2 fasts a week, No S compliance and rowing in between.
I can't/won't fast more - I already find the fasts tiring and the routine is becoming tedious. I don't know that I could exercise more either - extending time on the rower seems to be beyond my capacity or inclination. That seems to leave tweaking No S as the final possibility - but do I want to do that either? I look forward to the S days, the relaxation of the rules. But the deficit state I'm in during the week perhaps prompts over-indulgence on the weekend, and that nullifies the fasting altogether - except I've had to tolerate the strain of fasting, and I'm wondering, can I really detect the BENEFIT of fasting? I know the theory, but what can I feel and confirm for myself?
What would happen if I took a break from fasting, and just stuck to No S? No, that feels too sad. I don't want to give up, and that would feel just like giving up.
Yesterday I did do extra eating: biscuits, pancakes - but I also did extra exercise: cycling for about 50 minutes and 20 minutes on the rower: that could have balanced out - but seemingly didn't.
I am so bored with same figure revisits ad infinitum
Theoretical proposition: the amount I can gain on a weekend is now equal to the amount I can lose with 2 fasts a week, No S compliance and rowing in between.
I can't/won't fast more - I already find the fasts tiring and the routine is becoming tedious. I don't know that I could exercise more either - extending time on the rower seems to be beyond my capacity or inclination. That seems to leave tweaking No S as the final possibility - but do I want to do that either? I look forward to the S days, the relaxation of the rules. But the deficit state I'm in during the week perhaps prompts over-indulgence on the weekend, and that nullifies the fasting altogether - except I've had to tolerate the strain of fasting, and I'm wondering, can I really detect the BENEFIT of fasting? I know the theory, but what can I feel and confirm for myself?
What would happen if I took a break from fasting, and just stuck to No S? No, that feels too sad. I don't want to give up, and that would feel just like giving up.
Yesterday I did do extra eating: biscuits, pancakes - but I also did extra exercise: cycling for about 50 minutes and 20 minutes on the rower: that could have balanced out - but seemingly didn't.
Last edited by Graham on Sat Oct 09, 2010 10:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
10 stone 12lbs, Waist 37 1/2" BMI 23.9, WHtR 56%, Body Fat 29.4%
I have a cold too, but this weight has brought me low.
Must I restrict S day eating too? This feels sad, like being in a prison. Being "natural" on S days doesn't work for me. If I weren't fasting as well, would the story be different? I don't know, it didn't matter when No S and IF were working together for me, now I'm like a tired old boxer near the end of a fight, drained, propped up by leaning against the other fellow, out of ideas and resources, almost past caring who wins, just wanting it to be over.
I decided it wiser not to fast while I fight an infection, I will probably stick to No S though, unless it conflicts with some common-sense need. Not sure if I'll row either. I didn't row yesterday, I did make a short allotment visit, nothing too stressful, collecting the remaining pears and most of the apples, and a decent quantity of green beans.
I feel sad, - defeated? I feel like I'm not winning any more, even if I've not yet lost. I've made gains, but can't seem to hold them, going backwards is so easy, getting fat seems to have so much momentum behind it.
I have felt drained at times by fasting, No S alone wasn't effective when I first tried it, but then I'm neither big nor young. (those seeming to be the ideal conditions for regular No S to work - perhaps the ideal conditions for ANY weight-loss strategy to work)
What now for MY body? What is going to work now for me?
311pm The original No S strategy of S days to prevent rebellion works well until you reach the point I am at - where the ability to put pounds on in 2 days is greater than the ability to shed them in 5.
I'm not talking about doing some obvious gorging or bingeing - no, just about being a bit mindless with the snacks, grazing instead of dining, not stuffing myself, - if I could see obvious excess in my behaviour I'd feel loads better than I do now - I'd be able to identify my error and take action.
Right now I'm thinking the obvious thing would be to cancel S days altogether - (bad psychology to do that though) or limit S day eating behaviour, and I really hadn't wanted to do that. As I have a cold my mood and judgement may be impaired. Let's see how things look tomorrow.
I have a cold too, but this weight has brought me low.
Must I restrict S day eating too? This feels sad, like being in a prison. Being "natural" on S days doesn't work for me. If I weren't fasting as well, would the story be different? I don't know, it didn't matter when No S and IF were working together for me, now I'm like a tired old boxer near the end of a fight, drained, propped up by leaning against the other fellow, out of ideas and resources, almost past caring who wins, just wanting it to be over.
I decided it wiser not to fast while I fight an infection, I will probably stick to No S though, unless it conflicts with some common-sense need. Not sure if I'll row either. I didn't row yesterday, I did make a short allotment visit, nothing too stressful, collecting the remaining pears and most of the apples, and a decent quantity of green beans.
I feel sad, - defeated? I feel like I'm not winning any more, even if I've not yet lost. I've made gains, but can't seem to hold them, going backwards is so easy, getting fat seems to have so much momentum behind it.
I have felt drained at times by fasting, No S alone wasn't effective when I first tried it, but then I'm neither big nor young. (those seeming to be the ideal conditions for regular No S to work - perhaps the ideal conditions for ANY weight-loss strategy to work)
What now for MY body? What is going to work now for me?
311pm The original No S strategy of S days to prevent rebellion works well until you reach the point I am at - where the ability to put pounds on in 2 days is greater than the ability to shed them in 5.
I'm not talking about doing some obvious gorging or bingeing - no, just about being a bit mindless with the snacks, grazing instead of dining, not stuffing myself, - if I could see obvious excess in my behaviour I'd feel loads better than I do now - I'd be able to identify my error and take action.
Right now I'm thinking the obvious thing would be to cancel S days altogether - (bad psychology to do that though) or limit S day eating behaviour, and I really hadn't wanted to do that. As I have a cold my mood and judgement may be impaired. Let's see how things look tomorrow.
Last edited by Graham on Sat Oct 09, 2010 10:44 am, edited 1 time in total.
10 stone 10 1/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.6%
Didn't fast because I'm ill, didn't row (or do yoga or Bullworker for the same reason). I did eat well within No S constraints.
Didn't fast because I'm ill, didn't row (or do yoga or Bullworker for the same reason). I did eat well within No S constraints.
Last edited by Graham on Sat Oct 09, 2010 10:47 am, edited 1 time in total.
10st 9 3/4lbs, Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.7%
Rowed 3k in @ 16 min
As I cored an apple for cooking I couldn't resist nibbling off the good bits I'd failed to cut off - I realised it was a snack, so the day was a No S FAILURE That then had the usual effect: at my next meal, feeling angry at the nit-picking nature of the rules (my habitcal gold medal is gone - I now have no medal at all for No S) I found myself sloppy over one-plating, thinking "what's the point? the day's ****ed anyway"
Otherwse: continued gradual recovery from my cold, exercise routine gradually resuming (yoga, Bullworker as well as travelling by bike)
Rowed 3k in @ 16 min
As I cored an apple for cooking I couldn't resist nibbling off the good bits I'd failed to cut off - I realised it was a snack, so the day was a No S FAILURE That then had the usual effect: at my next meal, feeling angry at the nit-picking nature of the rules (my habitcal gold medal is gone - I now have no medal at all for No S) I found myself sloppy over one-plating, thinking "what's the point? the day's ****ed anyway"
Otherwse: continued gradual recovery from my cold, exercise routine gradually resuming (yoga, Bullworker as well as travelling by bike)
Last edited by Graham on Sat Oct 09, 2010 10:54 am, edited 2 times in total.
10 stone 11 1/2 lbs, Waist 38". BMI 23.8, WHtR 56.7%, Body Fat 30.9%
I don't want to fast, but what else can I do? Limited options to achieve clean arteries/long life. S days not yet happy and moderate.
just gone midnight. It was my worst fasting experience ever. A slight headache I'd barely noticed when I woke grew over the course of the day. By 6pm I felt really ill with headache and queasy stomach. I cut my fast short and decided I'd make no attempt to stick to a No S meal, I'd do what it took to recover. Had soup and toast, then a cup of tea, and gradually well-being returned. Later I ate 2 chicken sandwiches. Were they a snack or a second meal? I didn't care, and at home I certainly snacked - feeling I needed to be nice to myself. What a pickle I'm in! No S Failure
I don't want to fast, but what else can I do? Limited options to achieve clean arteries/long life. S days not yet happy and moderate.
just gone midnight. It was my worst fasting experience ever. A slight headache I'd barely noticed when I woke grew over the course of the day. By 6pm I felt really ill with headache and queasy stomach. I cut my fast short and decided I'd make no attempt to stick to a No S meal, I'd do what it took to recover. Had soup and toast, then a cup of tea, and gradually well-being returned. Later I ate 2 chicken sandwiches. Were they a snack or a second meal? I didn't care, and at home I certainly snacked - feeling I needed to be nice to myself. What a pickle I'm in! No S Failure
10stone 10 3/4lbs, Waist 38 1/8" BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.9%, Body Fat 31.5%
Rowing 3,516 metres in 17 min 22 sec, 191 cals
The effects of my cold still with me, full of resentments over issues, yet much is just stuckness on my part, unable (afraid?) to see what I need to change. And I still have other perspectives, can see beauty, feel gratitude - how to achieve integration?
Rowing 3,516 metres in 17 min 22 sec, 191 cals
The effects of my cold still with me, full of resentments over issues, yet much is just stuckness on my part, unable (afraid?) to see what I need to change. And I still have other perspectives, can see beauty, feel gratitude - how to achieve integration?
10 stone 10 1/2 lbs, Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.6, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.5%
No convenient opportunity for a second fast, plus the aftermath of a cold still sitting on my chest prompted attention to sound nutrition, supplements and extra rest. Weight/Waist loss programme is suffering, I wonder if I need to wait till spring before I resume in earnest?
No convenient opportunity for a second fast, plus the aftermath of a cold still sitting on my chest prompted attention to sound nutrition, supplements and extra rest. Weight/Waist loss programme is suffering, I wonder if I need to wait till spring before I resume in earnest?
10 stone 11 lbs, Waist 37 13/16" BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.4%, Body Fat 30.5%
Feeling rather more prepared to fast than last week. I'm not yet as fit and healthy as I was before my cold, still focusing on keeping up such things as "5-a-day", supplements, keeping warm, & exercising without strain.
Again this week may not afford a second fasting opportunity,, I'll see how this goes, and how I feel on Wednesday. I will be avoiding the aspartame-sweetened lemon and lime drink I had last week in case that contributed to the unholy headache and nausea I ended up with by 6pm last Monday.
Feeling rather more prepared to fast than last week. I'm not yet as fit and healthy as I was before my cold, still focusing on keeping up such things as "5-a-day", supplements, keeping warm, & exercising without strain.
Again this week may not afford a second fasting opportunity,, I'll see how this goes, and how I feel on Wednesday. I will be avoiding the aspartame-sweetened lemon and lime drink I had last week in case that contributed to the unholy headache and nausea I ended up with by 6pm last Monday.
10 stone 9 1/2* lbs waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.5, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.8%
8:40am Slept fairly well, slight headache, chest a little sore again. Leaving a centrally over-heated house to make a bike ride home through chilly autumn streets may be perpetuating my discomfort.
Would it be kinder to my lungs to walk? It would take @ 30 minutes, burning more calories, kinder to eyes and chest perhaps, safer too - worth a try?
Yesterday's fast was easy, almost a relief. The fast-breaking meal was well planned - it had all my 5 fruit and veg on one (virtual) plate, plus good protein - hard to say what could have improved it. The worst of the day was not spending even 5 minutes on the rowing machine, nor getting my second meditation done. HabitCal is looking a bit sad now, only 5 medals remain from 10, and I'm only sure of 3 of them lasting till month's end.
*about my weight - I had a cup of coffee before I remembered to weigh myself. I then weighed a cup of coffee full/empty and calculated the likely difference - scales said 10st 9 3/4 before subtraction and I've only taken off 1/4lb - that is fair, I'm certain of that.
8:40am Slept fairly well, slight headache, chest a little sore again. Leaving a centrally over-heated house to make a bike ride home through chilly autumn streets may be perpetuating my discomfort.
Would it be kinder to my lungs to walk? It would take @ 30 minutes, burning more calories, kinder to eyes and chest perhaps, safer too - worth a try?
Yesterday's fast was easy, almost a relief. The fast-breaking meal was well planned - it had all my 5 fruit and veg on one (virtual) plate, plus good protein - hard to say what could have improved it. The worst of the day was not spending even 5 minutes on the rowing machine, nor getting my second meditation done. HabitCal is looking a bit sad now, only 5 medals remain from 10, and I'm only sure of 3 of them lasting till month's end.
*about my weight - I had a cup of coffee before I remembered to weigh myself. I then weighed a cup of coffee full/empty and calculated the likely difference - scales said 10st 9 3/4 before subtraction and I've only taken off 1/4lb - that is fair, I'm certain of that.
10stone 9 1/4 lbs, Waist 37 3/4" BMI 23.4, WHtR 56.3%, Body Fat 30.8%
At a pub last night and even though indoor smoking no longer happens, my lungs still feel aggravated today. The damp climate, the cold, going from hot places to breathing cold air on the bike, ageing (damn that one!).
I had read, and hoped for an anti-inflammatory effect from fasting. At first I did seem to benefit that way, but now I seem to be no better off.
I'm not yet back to rowing, I now have a new supply of krill oil, I missed out on supplementary Vitamin C altogether yesterday. There are still ways I can build towards better health without considering changing climate.
At a pub last night and even though indoor smoking no longer happens, my lungs still feel aggravated today. The damp climate, the cold, going from hot places to breathing cold air on the bike, ageing (damn that one!).
I had read, and hoped for an anti-inflammatory effect from fasting. At first I did seem to benefit that way, but now I seem to be no better off.
I'm not yet back to rowing, I now have a new supply of krill oil, I missed out on supplementary Vitamin C altogether yesterday. There are still ways I can build towards better health without considering changing climate.
10st 11 1/4 lb, Waist 37 7/8", BMI 23.7, WHtR 56.5%, Body Fat 30.7%
Yesterday was busy but no time for any exercise, ate too much perhaps to get my 5-a-day all in my final meal. I'm assuming my chest and general immunity is helped more by getting the nutrients than it is harmed by the excess calories - an arguable point.
Fasting particularly points to such debates - the reported anti-inflammatory effect of fasts versus the danger of going short of critical nutrients - particularly if you are older/smaller and needing to consume less calories/food/nutrients anyway.
Yesterday was busy but no time for any exercise, ate too much perhaps to get my 5-a-day all in my final meal. I'm assuming my chest and general immunity is helped more by getting the nutrients than it is harmed by the excess calories - an arguable point.
Fasting particularly points to such debates - the reported anti-inflammatory effect of fasts versus the danger of going short of critical nutrients - particularly if you are older/smaller and needing to consume less calories/food/nutrients anyway.
10st 9lbs Waist 37 5/8" BMI 23.4, WHtR 56.2%, Body Fat 30.5%
9:17am. Stressful times. The fast went tolerably well, No S adhered to for the one and only meal of the day. Held back on exercise, partly circumstantial constraints, after tonight things may get a little easier - but I'm bouncing from crisis to crisis a bit just now. (I am now spokesperson for a group of malcontents in my local community choir, speaking tonight and I'm tense!)
I'm down to 3 medals out of 10 on my HabitCal (SO saw my HabitCal for the first time last night and asked me if I could really live like that...) Not my best month, but I am gradually getting over my chest issues, I'm having to be more conscious about caring for my health, not just relying on good old Mr Immune System to fix everything while I carry on regardless. Never mind.
For now I'm not minding whether I row every day or not, I can't even manage 2 fasts a week at the moment (hey - I can this week though! lets see how I feel on Thursday)
A stressful day ended in a social occasion with beer, toast, crisps and chocolate: a No S FAILURE - and a poor night's sleep.
9:17am. Stressful times. The fast went tolerably well, No S adhered to for the one and only meal of the day. Held back on exercise, partly circumstantial constraints, after tonight things may get a little easier - but I'm bouncing from crisis to crisis a bit just now. (I am now spokesperson for a group of malcontents in my local community choir, speaking tonight and I'm tense!)
I'm down to 3 medals out of 10 on my HabitCal (SO saw my HabitCal for the first time last night and asked me if I could really live like that...) Not my best month, but I am gradually getting over my chest issues, I'm having to be more conscious about caring for my health, not just relying on good old Mr Immune System to fix everything while I carry on regardless. Never mind.
For now I'm not minding whether I row every day or not, I can't even manage 2 fasts a week at the moment (hey - I can this week though! lets see how I feel on Thursday)
A stressful day ended in a social occasion with beer, toast, crisps and chocolate: a No S FAILURE - and a poor night's sleep.
Last edited by Graham on Wed Oct 27, 2010 7:37 am, edited 1 time in total.