Determined's Check-In

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Jul 19, 2011 7:47 pm

Okay...I'm back. I wish I could say that I've done this program for years, but I stopped & started & stopped & started again. So...I'm back. I changed my username...changed to a new HabitCal and I'm working on this again. I'm on Day 28 and working hard on just getting through one day at a time. I know this works, I know this is the best program for me. I know I'll be healthier if I just stick to this and not let discouragement distract me from my goal - being healthy. I've been addicted to food & weight loss since I was 5....well...that's the first time I remember being addicted to food. It probably started even earlier. I have decades of bad habits to break...but again, I'm here so that's a start anyway.

If I can accomplish Day 28, I can manage Day 29...

Determined in New York

mimi · Post by **mimi** » Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:00 pm

Determined, I can identify with your feelings...I have practiced NoS since 2007, but within that time I have stopped and restarted more times than I can recall now. For whatever reason, I somehow allow myself to be sidetracked and end up off-track. I really don't know why I do it. Mostly I think I allow my life's circumstances to throw me. I need to work on feeling my emotions and riding them out. I think Reinhard says some people take a dozen tries before it finally sinks in and they are successful. I am probably at that mark or close to it by now. I, too, like you, know that NoS works and it is the best program for me.
So, welcome back...best wishes, and just one day at a time.
Mimi

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 12:38 am

Hi Mimi,

Thanks so much for your reply. You're kind to welcome me back. You beat me back by 4 days! It's amazing, isn't it...this is such a simply plan...but it's so hard! When I'm eating well I feel so much better, I don't know why I keep sabotaging myself! Hopefully we'll both succeed this time, one day after another.

Thanks again!
Janie

Pangelsue2 · Post by **Pangelsue2** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 2:22 pm

Welcome back. I have been here several times before as well. We will make it a day at a time. As someone here said to me: fall down 7 times, get up 8 times. There is only getting back up or giving up. Giving up would be the saddest thing of all so let's keep getting up.

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 2:47 pm

Pangelsue2

Thanks so much for your Welcome. I think I'm closer to: fall down 50 times, get up 51!

This is such a battle...but I'm trying very hard to fight it just one day at a time. I'm definitely my own worst enemy when I look ahead & let myself get discouraged. Today I'm going to win this. I'll think about tomorrow when it gets here.

Thanks again,
janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 2:49 pm

Today is Day 30. I've not been struggling with my eating as much as my mind. I wish I could figure out why I talk to myself so negatively. I'd never talk to anyone else the way to talk to myself. I'm a cheerleader type to others, but doom & gloom to myself. Today I'm trying not to let myself be discouraged but just stick to the plan for today and worry about tomorrow when it arrives.

Day 30....I will conquer Day 30.

Determined...

mimi · Post by **mimi** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 9:53 pm

determined wrote:Today is Day 30. I've not been struggling with my eating as much as my mind. I wish I could figure out why I talk to myself so negatively. I'd never talk to anyone else the way to talk to myself. I'm a cheerleader type to others, but doom & gloom to myself. Today I'm trying not to let myself be discouraged but just stick to the plan for today and worry about tomorrow when it arrives.

Day 30....I will conquer Day 30.

Determined...

Yes, Pangelsue2, let's keep getting up...much better than giving up!
Negative self-talk is tough to deal with, but something you can overcome if you work at it - and it is so worth the effort. You are so worth it. You said it yourself - you'd never talk to anyone else that way. The trick is that you have to stop a negative thought in its tracks as soon as it enters your mind and immediately turn it around into a positive comment. Talk out loud to that inner voice if you have to. I do sometimes - and it works!
I think someone on these boards once alluded her inner critic voice to the character of Mrs. Danvers (the housekeeper from the classic novel Rebecca). You may have seen the old film classic too. She is constantly whispering nasty, hateful, negative things into the new Mrs. de Winter's ear...making her feel inferior to the former mistress of the house.
Anyway, pretend your inner critic's voice is Mrs. Danvers and tell her where to go! Let her know you're not going to listen to her anymore! Talk to her out loud (if you're not in a room full of people!)
Keep at it - one day at a time!
Mimi

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:26 am

Mimi...thanks for the visit. I read in another post that you MIL passed away. I'm so sorry for your loss. I've lost my parents & my FIL so I do understand some of what you are going through. I'm truly sorry & I hope you'll have sweet memories of her to help you through the grief.

Hugs...janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:35 am

Today is Day 31 (I think). It was a pretty good day all around....and surprisingly so. My oldest son has to leave for an Army school on Sunday, then go back to college right after that. We won't see him again until Thanksgiving & he's one of my favorite people in the world. He'll miss our daughter's birthday again (last year he was in Basic Training) so we went to Red Robin to celebrate her turning six a bit early. I normally would have eaten most of a burger and countless fries, but today I opted for a really yummy chicken salad & one onion ring. I'm calling this a green day because I didn't even finish my salad & what I ate would have easily fit on a normal dinner plate. I'm frosting cupcakes for later, but at this point they don't even tempt me....I'm not sure why...but I'm not complaining. There will be other cupcakes in the future...I can have one then.

All in all, the day was very satisfying....who could ask more than that?

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 1:28 pm

Day 33. I made it through the week with all green days & that feels wonderful. Last night we spent the evening with friends at their home. Their pool was delightful & the conversation was fun. They brought out plates of cookies & fruit & pastries. What did I eat? NOTHING! I had a glass of wine (highly unusual for me), and I just said that I wasn't hungry. And truly I wasn't! It was such a victory for me & it was a terrific way to end the week. I thought about switching a yellow weekend day with yesterday, but realized that even though I could have done it, I didn't have to. I absolutely could turned down the food & no one cared. I don't think anyone even noticed. It was a great feeling to be perfectly content enjoying the evening and not struggling with food.

I'm off to enjoy my day....

Determined...

milliem · Post by **milliem** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:20 pm

Wow what an achievement! Well done on your great day yesterday

Strawberry Roan · Post by **Strawberry Roan** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:52 pm

Wow, that is great and I have found what you said to be so true. We just tell ourselves that if we don't eat such and such everybody will notice and think it is weird.

They really don't care what we eat, do they?

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:55 pm

Milliem & Strawberry,

Thanks for the encouragement. It's so nice to feel cheered on!!!

janie

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 7:25 pm

Liten to your wise friend Strawberry. It's true that people hardly care if we pass up on their snacks.

And congrats on doing so well.

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 7:50 pm

Hi Who Me?

You're so right. I spent most of my life feeling self-conscious about what I eat or don't eat & it's absolutely true that no one cares! Lol.... It sure does make a huge difference to not think about anyone else's opinion. I'm just striving to do the best for me this time.

Thanks for your encouragement...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Jul 24, 2011 1:03 pm

Day 34 has begun. It's a baseball day for us....the last two games of the summer season & we're ready for it to be over. It's been a great season with my son's team winning all but one game, but it's time to enjoy the rest of the summer without running to games every other day. The good thing is that today I'll be out of the house most of the day & not tempted by the kitchen. It's a yellow day, but I certainly don't want to be an idiot. Being at the games will be helpful.

Day 34 here I come...janie

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Sun Jul 24, 2011 9:31 pm

Thanks so much for the encouragement! I needed a little nudge to get my mind back in the game! I really appreciate it. Nice to meet ya!

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 1:30 pm

Day 35...

The weekend went well. I ate more than on "N" days, but didn't go overboard. I even took our youngest to McDonalds (HIGHLY unusual) and I opted for a salad. I know I could have had anything, but those burgers & fries just send my brain into "failure" mode right now.

It's the start of another week & I'm ready. I'll succeed today. I'm not going to look ahead and I'm not looking back. Today...that's all I need to conquer.

Janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:48 pm

Day 36

Yesterday was tough....my hardest day yet for this time around. I wanted everything...a snack, seconds & sweets. I wanted it all. I stuck to the rules though & went to bed knowing I'd succeeded. I'm not sure what made the day so difficult, but perhaps it's that I didn't sleep well the night before. (I'm still in the process of getting used to a CPAP machine & I'm generally sleep deprived.) I'm tired a lot, but I think yesterday was just more than usual. Anyway....the day was hard but I survived it & today will be better.

I'm off to conquer Day 36

janie

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:52 pm

Great job! Don't you feel so wonderful this morning waking up knowing you succeeded? I LOVE that feeling.

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Jul 26, 2011 2:20 pm

Tobiasmom...

You're absolutely right & thanks for the reminder. I was focusing on the fact that yesterday was difficult & not on the fact that I scored a major victory. I think I really needed that reminder! Today is already better & I'm heading out the door with our youngest to visit the "Y".

We'll win this...we really will!

Thanks again...janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Jul 27, 2011 2:13 pm

Yesterday went well. I didn't struggle as much as I did on Monday. I've decided that I need to not only count the green days...but mentally note the small victories that add up to a green day.(Thanks Tobiasmom!) Yesterday was very busy with errands & taxi-ing the kids around. I went into the grocery store at 3:30 and was hungry. I'd had lunch & I knew what I'd planned for dinner. I had the whole culinary world at my fingertips and I chose to walk out of the store with the items on my list and nothing extra. I got to my car & felt satisfied that I'd conquered that trip to the store without sabotaging my goals. Overall, a very good day.

Day 37 here I come...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Jul 28, 2011 2:03 pm

Day 38...

Relatively easy day yesterday....and that always feels wonderful. Today is a trip to the "Y", then errands & home to get some work done...a typical day. What I truly want is for Day 38 to be another successful green day...

janie

mimi · Post by **mimi** » Thu Jul 28, 2011 10:58 pm

determined wrote:Day 38...

What I truly want is for Day 38 to be another successful green day...

janie

And it will be!! Keep up the great work!!

Mimi

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Jul 29, 2011 12:54 pm

Thanks Mimi!

Janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Jul 29, 2011 4:12 pm

Day 39...

Friday...I have one more day until the weekend. I can conquer just one more day. I'm thankful I started this on a Monday so I can count weeks as I finish the weekend. Anything that helps me think positively on this is wonderful.

Heading to the "Y" soon with the kids....that'll take care if my afternoon.

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Jul 30, 2011 1:46 pm

Day 40...

I made it. I made it through the week with all greens. Last night was difficult, but knowing a snack would turn my green week into a traffic light was enough to make me stay out of the kitchen. I usually don't struggle with evenings like that, but when my three teen boys begin their late-night forage for for food, it makes me want to join in! I didn't though...and that feels great. Today will be yellow, but I'll try to make it as close to a green day as possible.

I probably shouldn't write it down, but this time around has felt differently. My first try at this several years ago yielded around a 20-pound weight loss, but then I chose to get discouraged & quit. I tried to get back on track a few more times, but I really believe the sleep deprivation I had from undiagnosed sleep apnea & seasonal depression made the whole eating struggle so much worse. I feel SO much better physically & mentally now that I'm very hopeful that I'll be able to stick with this in the long-run. What a concept - eating like a healthy person for life!!!

I'm heading to a park with my dog & 5-year old for a walk...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Jul 31, 2011 1:23 pm

Day 41...

Yesterday's Yellow-Day treat was 2 chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven. VERY yummy.

I had a terrible night's sleep again & all I wanted to do when I woke up was eat. I didn't, but I wanted to. I think I'm really going to be careful on the days after I don't sleep well...which, sadly, are often.

When I conquer tomorrow, I will have achieved 6 weeks on this plan this time around. I know No S is the best way for me to eat for life....

janie

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Sun Jul 31, 2011 2:56 pm

Hi, thanks for your encouragement on my daily check-in. You inspire me that we can come back and when we come back we know that No S is the only way.

You are doing wonderful...I look forward to joining you in a week of green!

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Aug 01, 2011 12:50 pm

Day 43....

I miscounted. I finished my first 6 weeks yesterday. It feels good to be back...I'm less frantic about results....less worried about not succeeding.... and more determined to just keep my eyes on the day ahead & not the year ahead.

Yesterday was fine. I made blueberry ice cream last night for the family treat. It was so delicious! We're using the ice cream maker we gave my hubbie for Father's Day to make Sunday night ice cream night. It feels great to make a wonderful dessert once a week & have complete freedom to enjoy it without any guilt.

Here comes Day 43...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Aug 02, 2011 12:23 pm

Day 44...

Yesterday was a pretty easy green day. I was really tired, broke down & had some diet coke, but no food to accompany it. I don't drink diet coke often...probably only one a week, but I felt as if I either needed some caffeine or I'd start snacking. I feel more rested this morning.

janie

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Tue Aug 02, 2011 11:35 pm

I on occasion have a diet something to drink, like you not often.

I do make a .5 cup OJ and .5 of club soda, squirt of lime and splenda. I know, I know artificial sweetners are bad, but hey if Reinhard says sugar is okay then I guess splenda (in moderation) fits for me. I actually hate the taste of real sugar now...this is a great drink verses a binge for me.

Have a great Wednesday!

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 03, 2011 11:43 am

Thanks Deb....that sounds delicious! I'll have to try it...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 03, 2011 11:52 am

Day 45...

Yesterday was another green & that feels great. I was hungry last night...I stayed up later than usual since my daughter wanted to watch the new episode of Billy the Exterminator. I wanted to snack, especially when the boys came in the kitchen for more food, but I stayed on the sofa and resisted. I'm thankful I did....it felt wonderful to add another green square on my calendar.

I'm going to conquer today....it's Wednesday so if I conquer today I'll be more than halfway to the weekend.

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 03, 2011 2:26 pm

I will NOT eat my daughter's leftover bagel half. I won't...I won't....I'll fix it...I'm drowning it in the sink. There. No bagel. No temptation. Today WILL be green.

I am Determined.

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:25 pm

Day 45...

Phew....I beat the bagel yesterday! It almost conquered me...but it didn't. It felt wonderful to record another green on my calendar this morning. Once I drowned that bagel, the rest of the day was uneventful...no more problems with temptation even though I went grocery shopping on a truly empty stomach. I ate a very small & very late lunch, but the day was quite easy after that evil bagel.

Day 45 here I come...

janie

Strawberry Roan · Post by **Strawberry Roan** » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:40 pm

Die Bagel Die

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:47 pm

Berry....

LOL...I should put that phrase up on my refrigerator! Thanks for the giggle...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Aug 05, 2011 1:56 pm

Day 47...

Today is our daughter's 6th birthday. Her little friends will come over this afternoon for a party & I still have a ton of things to accomplish. I haven't decided if I'll treat this as an "S" day or not. I really don't care for her favorite kind of cake so I'm thinking that I might just pass on the cake & keep today a lovely shade of green. But if I choose cake, that'll be okay too.

Can't believe my baby is six...

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 06, 2011 2:11 pm

Day 48...

Yesterday I was trapped in the house with a birthday cake and candy. I could have declared it an "S" day since it was my daughter's 6th birthday, but I looked at the cake and decided eating strawberry cake wasn't worth it. I don't think I've ever turned cake down before, but it felt wonderful to have the upperhand this time. And ya know what? Once I decided to turn my back on the fake strawberry-flavored confection, nothing happened! It didn't jump off the table & shove itself into my mouth....I didn't find myself pinned down on the kitchen floor with cake at my throat....I didn't hear it calling my name in the middle of the night...and....I didn't feel deprived at all! I felt a sense of power over this lifelong food dysfunction.

The weekend is here & I'm ready to not be an idiot!

I am Determined...

r.jean · Post by **r.jean** » Sat Aug 06, 2011 6:21 pm

Great job! Now that I eat less I am more picky about what I eat too. Fake strawberry cake is not worth it.

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 06, 2011 6:31 pm

r.jean...thanks! I'm SO glad I conquered the cake. It definitely wasn't worth declaring yesterday an "S" day. It WAS a special day, but not one person noticed that I didn't have cake...except me & I was very happy at leaving the cake alone.

Thanks for dropping by...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Aug 07, 2011 4:38 pm

Day 49...

I've just completed 7 weeks. These weeks were relatively easy ones & now I anticipate this whole adventure being more difficult. This is when I usually get discouraged because I always want to see more results & I start doubting that I'll end up succeeding anyway. I end up being my own worst enemy. Today will be fine...it's a yellow day & I have a lot planned for the rest of the day to keep myself busy. I have to take this one day at a time...not looking back at the past defeats & not looking ahead to how long this will take me. I need to keep my mind on today...just today....

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:10 pm

Day 50...Today starts another week.

Yesterday was very fun. We got a huge gift certificate for Carrabas & took the whole family (6 of us). I had a few bites of appetizer, bread, salad & half an entree. Not only was the food terrific, but the time together was delightful. Our oldest heads back to college on Saturday & we won't see him again until Thanksgiving so it was a really nice way to enjoy an evening together before he leaves. Sunday nights are homemade ice cream night at our house & last night's was coconut. I didn't have a lot, but it was absolutely delicious! Overall, I ate more yesterday than I normally would have, but I didn't eat to excess & that felt wonderful. My stomach is growling this morning so I guess I didn't do too badly yesterday. I'm ready to start another green week. I had an emotionally challenging day on Saturday & wanted to give up, but every time I want to and don't I know I've made progress.

Week 8 here I come...

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 1:10 pm

Monday was green. I think Mondays are my most difficult day of the week. There's something about that freedom to eat a bit more on the weekends that just wants to sneak into the rest of the week. If I can keep a fence around Mondays, I think I'll do okay.

I rarely have a hard time resisting snacks in the evenings, but lately it's been difficult. I keep trying to remind myself that being a bit hungry is a good thing....it means that my body is using up my reserves & that's my goal!

Day 51 here I come.

Determined

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 1:19 pm

Good for you! You conquered the fake pink cake!

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 1:34 pm

Who Me? wrote:Good for you! You conquered the fake pink cake!

Thanks Who Me?! It's amazing how many birthday cakes I've eaten in my life & never really enjoyed them....it's such a "Duh" moment to realize that fake cake is just not worth it!

Have a great day!
janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 10, 2011 1:16 pm

Day....ummm....45...I think....

Wednesday...the middle of the week. If I can conquer today, I can finish out this 7th week of green & yellow. I'm fighting discouragement, and mostly winning, but it's not easy. This is typically where I fail....after a number of weeks eating well. I don't know why I sabotage myself...but I do it so often. I somehow don't feel as if I'm making enough progress & give up on the whole thing. What? Why in the WORLD would giving up be better than sticking it out and eventually winning the battle? I don't have time to ponder this today so I just need to hang on for today...just today...

janie

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Wed Aug 10, 2011 1:56 pm

Hang in here! You're doing great!

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:40 pm

Thanks Who me?....I appreciate the encouragement...

janie

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Thu Aug 11, 2011 12:33 pm

Janie: I completely understand where you're coming from. I'm a serial dieter/quitter! ha. But No-S is different. Even IF and WHEN you have a failure, it's just so easy to pick up with three yummy meals the next day and move on! Just wanted you to know that I get it. This journey is a struggle for me too! I have real expectations of the scale that are just not reasonable. I just know deep inside No-S works.

I know you can do this!!

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 11, 2011 12:43 pm

tobiasmom...

Thanks so much for dropping by. This is quite the adventure, isn't it? I absolutely believe you that you get it. There are people who don't, but it helps so much to know there are kindred spirits here. And I agree with you...No S is definitely the answer. There really is no alternative to healing this food dysfunction thing. And I don't want to just lose weight...I WANT to be a healthy person & No S is truly the only way for me to get there.

Thanks for your encouragement...we'll get there!

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 11, 2011 12:50 pm

Thursday...Day 46...

I feel so much better when Thursdays roll around. I just have to hang on today & tomorrow & I'll chalk up another week of healthy eating. Once I get passed the middle of the week I can see myself succeeding for another few days. That's as far as I can think, though....just this week...just today....I can do just today.

janie

r.jean · Post by **r.jean** » Thu Aug 11, 2011 11:01 pm

Way to go! Each week adds to the habit and makes it easier. I had a major red yesterday, but at 7 1/2 months in, it is not such a big deal. It just happens. It is easier to just get back on track the next day.

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Aug 12, 2011 2:08 pm

r.jean...

7 1/2 months is fabulous! Congrats - that's a great accomplishment!

janie

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Fri Aug 12, 2011 7:01 pm

Hi changed my user name...I thought mmm, if I don't snack I don't binge..so why no NoSnacker

.

You are doing fabulous, should be day 46, is that how long you have been on No S?

I'm in for 2 weeks so far of green. Looking forward to possibly having a dairy queen ice cream this weekend.

Have a great weekend!

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Aug 12, 2011 7:10 pm

Hi NoSnacker!

We're practically neighbors since you're in Buffalo & I'm near Syracuse!

I started NoS the first time about 3 years ago. I had a great few months & then let myself get discouraged & I gained back what I'd lost. Since then I tried to get started again a couple of times but always failed. I think I've known since my first time around that NoS is the only plan that will truly work for me, but it was so hard to get started again. I had some medical issues this winter & I feel SO much better now & I'm hopeful that I'll not give up this time. I've been dysfunctional around food all my life (I'm 51) and to be healthy enough around food to not be manipulated by it any more would be amazing. So...I'm trying to take one day at a time & hopefully I'll not give up....

Thanks for dropping by....the encouragement of being here helps so much!!!

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Fri Aug 12, 2011 7:17 pm

Day 47...

It's almost 4:00 & I haven't had lunch. Now, I'm not one to advocate skipping meals 'cause that can be a recipe for a binge, but I ate a late breakfast & spent a few hours at the zoo with two of my kids. By the time I got home, it seems just too late to bother eating. And ya know what? I'm okay with that. I don't feel deprived or panicked or scared of eating too much at dinner. I'm just fine. And that feels rather amazing.

This morning I tried on a pair of pants I haven't worn in years & even though they were too tight to wear, I know they are close to fitting. I'm trying very hard not to think ahead & I'm not trying to speculate on how long it will take have what I'm wearing be too big...but just trying on those pants was very encouraging. AND...today is Friday. It's a good day to be encouraged 'cause I certainly don't want to be an idiot on the weekend.

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 13, 2011 11:56 am

Day 48...

Saturday. Ahhhhh....I made it to Saturday.

janie

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Sat Aug 13, 2011 12:07 pm

Have an awesome weekend!

r.jean · Post by **r.jean** » Sat Aug 13, 2011 12:37 pm

Isn't it amazing to suddenly fit into old clothes? Or to realize that you really should quit wearing something that has gotten too baggy? I love it!

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 13, 2011 1:43 pm

r. jean - Nothing tastes as good as that feels!

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Aug 14, 2011 12:43 pm

Day 49...

Seven weeks in. I'm sitting here before going to church, eating a yummy bowl of fruit & yogurt. I'd love a bagel with real butter, but I've decided those are a trigger for me. I can't eat them & expect to eat well the rest of the day. Hopefully someday I can eat them again & enjoy them even more, but for now they are off the menu. Besides...this breakfast is really yummy.

We're heading to a graduation party this afternoon & for once in a long time, the thought doesn't panic me. I'll enjoy some food, but I don't think I'll overeat & because tonight is homemade ice cream night, I might even turn down the cake. I know I have miles to go, but right now it feels wonderful to be on the side of controling my food instead of my food controling me.

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:18 am

Day 52...

Monday was my first red day. I was so tired...an tired of being tired. Between swallowing air with my CPAP machine and the dog wanting to go outside in the middle of the night every night, I'm just plain tired. I definitely get more discouraged when I'm weary. It wasn't a good day...

Yesterday was difficult, but I had a green day again & it helped to get back on track right away. I still feel shaky, but I'm determined to not give up. I have bloodwork done on Thursday & it actually helped to know I'll be doing that - I don't want to end up on cholesterol medication.

I can handle today...just today....

determined

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:43 pm

I'm with ya! I barely made it through my second green day yesterday. I've just been struggling lately.........but it's so worth it to make it through these days! There's tough days and easy days. This is just the best plan ever, though!

BTW, how do you make your homemade ice cream? In an ice cream maker? My hubby got me an ice cream maker attachment for my KitchenAid, but I haven't used it yet.........

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 8:52 am

determined wrote:Monday was my first red day. Yesterday was difficult, but I had a green day again & it helped to get back on track right away. I still feel shaky, but I'm determined to not give up.

Hi there, I know the discouragement of having the first red day, I had a couple a month since I started. I just had one the other day. But ya know we truly need to trust ourselves that we can and will do this. This lifestyle is something we can live with..as we know diets don't work.

From my experience of my last red day it was a day of foods that I really didn't want, they were okay don't get me wrong, but I had thoughts of other things.

And we are human, we will have a slip up here and there.

This is not like other diets, I know you probably thought oh here I go again...I know I did, but I did not let those thoughts win.

We are winners..even if you had 2 days in a row, big deal. Love and forgive yourself and move on.

I had to be careful yesterday as my dinner didn't turn out the way I expected and I kept in mind okay, something I really didn't like, but no reason to binge later..and for once I talked myself out of going for something else in the evening.

I have high cholesterol as well and can't be on meds, I do try to take red rice yeast to help...but not faithful about it.

Deb

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 12:45 pm

Tobiasmom & Nosnacker...thanks so much for dropping by & sending encouragement. I definitely needed it!

Tobiasmom...I gave my hubbie an ice cream maker for Father's Day since he LOVES ice cream. I use that to make our Sunday evening treats. This week is our 6-year old's turn to pick the kind - vanilla. I'm making homemade chocolate sauce to add a bit more yum. I love Sunday evening ice cream!!!

NoSnacker...I gave up on NoS after being quite successful at it a few years ago. I could just kick myself for not sticking with it....but that's the past. I think it makes me even more determined to not give up. There just is no other option for being truly healthy around food.

Thanks again...

Determined

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 1:01 pm

I'm not sure what day it is....I think I've been counting wrong, but it doesn't really matter.

I had a tough day yesterday, but it was a green day so I succeeded. I even went grocery shopping in the evening & didn't even think about eating anything. I'm still discouraged, but I'm positive a lot of that is related to my weariness. I lost a piece of my CPAP mask last night & slept even worse than normal. I have to find it today and I just have to get a good night's sleep soon. I feel like I did when my first three kids were four & under....I just need some rest.

I'm going to succeed today, no matter what.

Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 5:17 pm

Hi, I started a new post for those of us that started in Jun/July/Aug, I thought we might be able to all touch base there if you have time of course. I would like to see all of us succeed and lean on each other for moral support and of course learn alot from the long timer's. There are a couple great posts that I had asked some long timer's some questions...very insightful.

Hope you have a better day today...I'm doing okay so far, my daughter and her children will be coming over for dinner...golash, fast, easy, and cheap!

deb

tobiasmom · Post by **tobiasmom** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 6:25 pm

Wowzers! I'm so excited to find an experienced homeschooler! You've definitely been there and done that! Awesome! We're only in preK right now. We're using Heart of Dakota. I do plan at this point to stick with them for the long haul. I'm loving their program.

My biggest "issue" is that he's an only child. So I just want to make sure I don't segregate him from all child contact. I'm already trying to get him into activities and such....but not too many. I definitely can get that way....biting off more than I can chew!!! There's a lot of coops and such here in Texas. But for now it's just us and some play dates!

NoSRocks · Post by **NoSRocks** » Thu Aug 18, 2011 7:47 pm

Hi again! Thanks for your nice comments, really good to know that they are a help. I, too, had started in 2009 and had a good run first time around... until i started to gain a few lbs and then basically got frustrated/impatient and gave up. Needless to say, I did not do any better once I left the No S plan - just fudged around with other diets and eating plans until I eventually decided to get my head together and returned in January of this year. Progress has been very slow for me on this plan, however I am starting to lose a lot of the diet head mentality/food anxiety. I still have issues with weighing too much and too often but other than that, doing well and really enjoying this way of eating.

Have a wonderful Friday!!

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 20, 2011 12:20 pm

Hi Tobiasmom & NoSnacker....sure is nice of you to drop by...

Tobiasmom...You'll do fine with your little guy. Just relax...have fun...the best thing you can teach him is that learning is a great thing. If he loves bugs, study bugs....if he loves tractors, go to a tractor show....make slime...make play dough...blast off rockets in the backyard....just enjoy him & you'll do just fine.

NoSnacker...Isn't it amazing how much of our lives can be affected by this food dysfunction stuff? I remember what a dr. said to me at age 5 - that I should lose 5 pounds. 46 years later I'm still dealing with weight issues. Amazing.

Thanks again...janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Sat Aug 20, 2011 12:22 pm

Saturday.....Ahhh, Saturday!

I survived the rest of this week with four greens in a row. Monday's red day is now history & it felt great to get back on track after that. I'm still fighting discouragement, but I keep telling myself there is no alternative to this way of eating. Progress is maddeningly slow, but at least I'm eating well and moving in the right direction.

Here's to a good Saturday!
Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Sat Aug 20, 2011 2:55 pm

determined wrote:Saturday.....Ahhh, Saturday!

...Progress is maddeningly slow, but at least I'm eating well and moving in the right direction. Determined

I feel the same way...I had 1 red this week, like Tuesday and have since got back as well,,,so here is to 4 greens to us..cheers!

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Aug 21, 2011 1:21 pm

Sunday...Day something-or-other...

I spent yesterday with my daughter...shopping...then a Build-a-Bear birthday party for one of her friends. I was offered cake & ice cream at 4:00, but even though I hadn't had any lunch, I realized that I just didn't want any. I was hungry, but I wasn't hungry for cake. How weird is THAT? After the party I stopped at the grocery store & picked up pizza for dinner. My Saturday treat was a dark chocolate Dove candy bar & it was absolutely delicious. I'm sure if I'd have eaten the cake in the afternoon, the chocolate treat wouldn't have tasted quite so yummy.

I'm SO thankful I didn't give up this week after my red Monday. I'm ready to start another green week tomorrow...just one day at a time....

Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Mon Aug 22, 2011 8:47 am

Sounds like the perfect weekend!! I hope to be walking in your shoes someday

.

It is about time I tame my S days down..now if my rebellious child within would let me

.

Have a great green week.

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Aug 22, 2011 12:33 pm

Hi NoSnacker....

When I did this plan a few years ago, I had a LOT more problems with the weekends so I really can identify with the difficulty of having freedom when Saturday rolls around. I'm not sure why this time around isn't as difficult, but I do keep trying to remember that what we're learning here is maintenance first. There's no other plan like this. First people take off pounds - usually too quickly - THEN they think about maintenance & because they'd not learned that while they were dieting, there's regaining. I've certainly done more than my fair share of doing THAT! But this is the opposite. We're learning to tame the food...and maintain...and that's exactly what we need to learn. But that's the hard part, isn't it? I'm learning to maintain my weight even before I lose the weight...and I really think that's part of what makes the weekends difficult. Learning to maintain is the key...I have the freedom to eat whatever I want, but if I want to learn to maintain, I need to win the battle with those days, even if it's baby steps.

You seem to be very hard on yourself with the weekend eating. Maybe you are forgetting that you are absolutely succeeding every day you mark another green...and your greens FAR outweigh your weekend eating. It's Monday. And you can do this. You CAN have a green day. This past weekend is over. There's nothing you can do about those two days, but you CAN win today. This is a battle we can win...and I truly believe we will....

Hugs to you...janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Aug 22, 2011 12:44 pm

I think I was counting my days incorrectly. I just checked my HabitCal & I've completed 9 weeks. I'm not sure if it's helping me to count or not. Sometimes the counting helps be realize that every day I add to the green pile is another healthy day. But on the other hand, counting makes me think about how far I have to go. I'll have to think about it....

This weekend was my best so far this time around. I had a small Dove chocolate bar on Saturday & about 1/3 cup of delicious homemade ice cream for dessert last night. Oh...and I had more chips than I needed with pizza on Saturday. For me, that adds up to a great weekend. Mondays are usually my most difficult day, but I think I'll be okay today. (Maybe I shouldn't say that out loud!

)

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Aug 23, 2011 12:37 pm

Interesting eating day yesterday. I had a yummy fruit & yogurt breakfast and then when the kids were making lunch, I had some crackers and then some Baked Lays (which I LOVE). The problem was that I hadn't made my lunch yet & then I had to decide what to do. I REALLY didn't want a red Monday again so I had to make a choice. My choice was to make those crackers & chips be my lunch. Nutritious? No. But I knew those would have easily fit on a plate and it was better to consider those lunch than to make another red day on my calendar. The bottom line was that I was happy with my choice, even though I missed out on a yummy lunch. I'm calling yesterday a success!

Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Tue Aug 23, 2011 9:29 pm

determined wrote:Hi NoSnacker....you seem to be very hard on yourself with the weekend eating. Maybe you are forgetting that you are absolutely succeeding every day you mark another green...and your greens FAR outweigh your weekend eating. It's Monday. And you can do this. You CAN have a green day. This past weekend is over. There's nothing you can do about those two days, but you CAN win today. This is a battle we can win...and I truly believe we will....Hugs to you...janie

Thanks Janie! I screwed up Monday I don't know why I'm so hungry the last couple days..could be hormonal I'm thinking..but today my husband made a seafood stew which I'm so looking forward to a nice big bowl..

You are doing fabulous!!!!

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 24, 2011 1:24 pm

NoSnacker...Thanks for the encouragement. Monday is history! Who cares about Monday...today's another day! You're doing great...

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 24, 2011 1:31 pm

Yesterday's victory was leaving a brownie mix on the grocery shelf! I was gathering some snacks for my sons' friends. They came over last night for a bonfire & I considered making brownies. As I was reaching for the box I realized that if I made them, I wouldn't be able to resist them. Instead of buying the box anyway, I just decided that the snacks I already had planned were enough. I didn't have to fight the urge to eat brownies when I didn't invite them in my house! VICTORY!!! The rest of the day was a piece of cake (pun definitely intended!)

Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 9:32 am

Wow, this was sure a victory...I know there was a couple times I saw jelly beans, this first time I thought don't buy them Deb, you know you will eat them as you can't have them as measured snacks..and that time I didn't the second time I did and just as suspected, I ate and ate until they were gone over a cross of a couple days..so now I don't buy..I guess if I want them bad enough I can buy a small bag for the weekend...

Good pass!

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 12:59 pm

I LOVE jellybeans! Unfortunately, so does my whole family! I can't even have one or I'll want the whole bag!!!

janie

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 1:11 pm

I had another green day yesterday. I was struggling in the early afternoon so I just went outside for some yardwork. By the time I got back inside, I was fine. Keeping busy is such a key for me...and it's so much better in general. I love feeling more productive....besides, my yard looks better too! Yesterday's chore was demolishing an old homemade compost bin system. It was falling apart & our dog was starting to nose her way into it. I ordered a really nice heavy plastic one that will hold all our kitchen scraps and a lot of leaves too. My garden is so happy with all the compost our family produces...

Off to chalk up another green day...

Determined

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 1:30 pm

Did you really eat a plate's worth of crackers and potato chips?

Could you have "virtually plated" and made that *part* of a better lunch?

determined · Post by **determined** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 2:49 pm

Who me?

Lol...I didn't eat an entire plate full of crackers & chips...and I suppose I could have virtually plated them with other healthy things. I think my issue was that I snacked on those two bad choices. Nutritionally, it wasn't a good choice to consider them lunch, but emotionally it was either consider those lunch or mark it as a red day. After I snacked, I realized that I really wasn't that hungry either. Making that bad choice into a meal seemed better to me than considering the day a failure by adding more food. I might not have had a great day nutritionally, but I gained control of what could have been a really bad day. I felt as if I got back on track before the train left the station & that was more important for me than a balanced lunch. And...I haven't snacked since. I don't want to miss out on another yummy lunch!

Thanks for dropping by!

Janie

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Thu Aug 25, 2011 3:51 pm

determined wrote: Nutritionally, it wasn't a good choice to consider them lunch, but emotionally it was either consider those lunch or mark it as a red day. After I snacked, I realized that I really wasn't that hungry either. Making that bad choice into a meal seemed better to me than considering the day a failure by adding more food. I might not have had a great day nutritionally, but I gained control of what could have been a really bad day. Thanks for dropping by!

Janie

Janie, I have had potato chips for lunch which I put on a plate..if it is something replacing a meal that is okay...as I'm sure you will find that you crave regular food more. But on occasion it is okay....

If I want to have a snack (No Sweet), for a meal I do..but again not very often.

You are okay, you made the right choice to get right back to regular eating at your next meal.

What you don't want to do is beat yourself up for having what you had and embrace the freedom we are allowed on No S.

Keep up the good work.

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 12:25 pm

Today certainly is a rain-soaked Sunday. There won't be any walks with the dog today!

I had regular bloodwork done on Friday morning, but the day went downhill after that. I struggled emotionally...I couldn't shake the thoughts that I'm going to fail at this anyway. It ended up as a red day.....

Yesterday, however, ended well since I had something very encouraging happen to break me out of my funk. I went shopping & decided that if I couldn't wear the next size smaller in pants, I wouldn't buy anything. I took 6 pair of pants in a lower size into the dressing room & every one of them fit perfectly. I didn't have to tug or suck in my breath...they just zipped up and I could have walked out in any of them. The last time I shopped I barely could buy the next size up so this was a VERY encouraging afternoon. The timing on buying a smaller size was perfect. I never weigh myself because I've had too many years of obsessing over them...so fitting into a new size was all the encouragement I needed to keep going...

janie

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 12:36 pm

The pants don't lie!!!!

I'm impressed because I find that woman's clothes are sized in such an incomprehensible manner. I'm pretty sure I wear everything fom an extra-small to an extra-large. The best one is that I wear a *very* small bra size, and own (adult sized) sports bras from Calvin Klein that are sized large. Dudes. I'm an a-cup. Please. Get real. If I'm a large, who the heck is a small?

Pangelsue2 · Post by **Pangelsue2** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:12 pm

Smaller sized pants!! That is every woman's dream! Congratulations and keep up the good work. You have stuck to your "determined" plan through some rough days and hard temptations. You are a force to be reckoned with, girl.

milliem · Post by **milliem** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:40 pm

Wow congratulations, must have felt great to fit into those smaller trousers! (sorry, can't call them pants, my pants are knickers and I don't think you'd have gone walking out of the dressing room in just those!

)

Who Me, I agree, sizing on clothes is a total mess! I'm pretty sure I'm a size that doesn't actually exist in the realm of clothing. I'm just waiting for the day that I'm rich and famous and can get all my clothes personally tailored

determined · Post by **determined** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 6:43 pm

Thank you so much all three of you, for stopping by & adding words of encouragement. I am thrilled with being able to buy a new size. I know I have a long way to go & the habits of 51 years will not easily be broken, but at least I know I'm heading in the right direction. I really don't care how quickly I lose this, just knowing that there's been some improvement is delightful. I'm so GLAD I didn't give up 2 weeks ago! I've done that all my life, and this time I just don't want to ever give up. I want to eat this way for the rest of my life.....

We are in this together...we're going to win this battle!

Thanks again for the encouragement...

I am Determined!!!

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 8:36 pm

determined wrote:I'm so GLAD I didn't give up 2 weeks ago! I've done that all my life, and this time I just don't want to ever give up. I want to eat this way for the rest of my life.....

We are in this together...we're going to win this battle!

I'm glad you didn't give up either..we need all the troops to cheer each other on...

Thanks for stopping by my post and encouraging me on..after I continually battle the S Days Gone Wild.

deb

snapdragon · Post by **snapdragon** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 9:05 pm

Wow your doing great. I have been doing this unofficially for a Year and still haven't gotten 21 days in a row.
one of my focusesnow is what I am going to do INSTEAD of eating.
Have a great night.

determined · Post by **determined** » Mon Aug 29, 2011 3:38 pm

Thanks for dropping by!

Yesterday was fine. I had some homemade peppermint ice cream for dessert & I think I had a snack....but I don't truly remember. I know today is a green day & I'm determined to make it a green week!

Determined...

determined · Post by **determined** » Tue Aug 30, 2011 12:24 pm

Day 72...

I'm heading to the "Y" this morning with two of my kids. I really need to get there more often. Hopefully when we're back in a homeschool routine, I'll be able to add it to the schedule and keep it consistent for all of us.

Yesterday was an easy green day. I'm a bit concerned about a road trip this weekend since those usually trigger a lot of miscellaneous eating, but I'll take it a day at a time. I plan to make sure I have healthy snacks around so if I just can't manage the time without extra eating, at least I'll have some fruit & nuts with me. We're only gone 5 days & two are the weekend. Oh well....I'll not worry about it today. Today is a GREEN day!

Determined

NoSnacker · Post by **NoSnacker** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:46 am

Smart planning for your trip and here's to another green day!!!

Who Me? · Post by **Who Me?** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 12:47 pm

Packing "real" food, and eating on-schedule are always a good idea!

determined · Post by **determined** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:36 pm

Thanks for dropping by NoSnacker & Who Me?

I went to my dr. today for a check on my bloodwork. My cholesterol was down, my weight was down, my blood pressure was down, my blood sugar was down, and my Vitamin D level was up closer to where it should be. I see her again in 3 months & I'm even more determined to keep my weeks green. I don't think I remember ever being encouraged after seeing a dr...well...maybe when I went to confirm my pregnancies!

...but never when I went to have my bloodwork looked at.

Eating the NoS way is certainly working well for me...I'm DETERMINED!!!

janie