Deb's Check-in

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey folks! I've been wanting to post a picture of myself and my son for some time now, and, well I guess I've just been procrastinating...
On the old Yahoo site I could upload lots of stuff, and did (including some very silly cartoons I drew of our beloved leader! LOL...)
Well here's an old picture of myself and my son Richard in 2000... He was just four... Right now he is just about level with my shoulders! Next year, I'm sure he'll be at eye level!
My hair isn't a tosseled curly mess anymore and it's really short, so use your imagination...
Back then I was about 175... I don't think I looked obese at all, but no, not a twiggy type for sure...
I'm going to take pictures this month and get them onto some thing like photobucket or whatever... (but now that I said it I'm probably going to procrastinate some more!)
Have a fantastic holiday weekend all...
Today was, if anything, too little food.. Off to make a giant family pack of chicken now and then that's it for cooking for me this weekend! Ooooh! I'm already smelling someones BBQ out my open window!!! Yummy!!!!!
Love and Peace,
Deb
Hope this link works... We were at a 20th year reunion picnic that day for all the alumni of a youth hangout here in Great Neck called Levels.. That place kept me off the street in those days...
http://jimwinston.org/levels/fedders.html
Hope you guys all get brave and post some photos too!

[cvmom]

Deb:

You are gorgeous!!!! And your son looks precious. I'm sure he looks totally different now. I have an 11 1/2 year old who is almost as tall as me. He is starting middle school this year. I can't believe how fast time goes.

Have a great next few days.

XXOO
Dru

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Dru! I could get used to being called gorgeous! Huh, huh, huh...LOL...
I feel really good these days, hope you do too!
Peace and Love and XO's!
Deb

[3lilgals4me]

Deb--I am just reading through some daily check-ins and wanted to say "hi"! Your journey into no-s land is fun and inspiring to read!

judy

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Judy! I am glad to be fun and inspiring... It beats droning and dull!
Hope you are having a nice morning!
Peace and Love,
Deb

[navin]

Deb -

I think I've seen that picture of you and Richard before - but what good picture! You're either good looking or very photogenic. Although I can't help but imagine - if that was in 2000, Richard is about 5 years older, does he have long hair, big baggy pants, and a backwards cap yet?

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Nathan! I guess if I get to choose, I will say I am not photogenic! LOL.....
Richard is much taller, slimmer, has shorter hair, more freckles, and an earring!
I'll be taking more pics next week and you will all see him once they're online... I have a tripod somewhere around here...
Peace and Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Is it just me guys, or are you all finding that eating to excess, like in the past, is growing less and less rewarding?
I wasn't excessive by last years standards, but I had a couple of things which just felt heavy afterwards, and I am feeling really full, and it was really not that much... Just two extra chicken drumsticks and half a container of 7/11 nachos! I think it's time to ditch that one... It just didn't taste all that great anyway....
I am just so incredibly full right now! This is weird!!!
But it's a good weird....

Enjoyed a couple of decadent treats today.... A small soft chocolate ice cream cone, and a plain crispy creme donut....
Those were really good...
Had some nice sun and pleasure reading by the pool, and did a few laps, albeit mostly just floating back and forth, lazily contemplating the clouds above me.... That was heaven!
Reading a book my Yoga teacher gave me as a birthday present.. It seems reminiscent of some of the old Carlos Castaneda books:
Dan Millman's "The Way of the Peacful Warrior"....
Anyone read it?

Have a groovy evening my friends....
Peace and Love,
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

The book reviews at amazon were interesting. Not something I would be likely to read, but I'm glad you are enjoying it.

I am waiting eagerly for my husband to finish "Zorro" so I can get at it. Very very well written.

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Jammin Jan! I hope Zorro finds it's way into your hands! (I mean the book okay? LOL....)
Well today was pretty much not an S day at all... I get paid tomorrow so I had to live off the memories of the crispy creme and the icecream cone from yesterday as I couldn't afford to feed a parking meter today! LOL...
Really...

We had fun.. Wen't to the pool again and listened to a nice covers band who played Beatles, Beach Boys.. etc...
The one really nice treat I had today, and yes I guess it's an S, was that I made homemade blueberry pancakes for brekkie....The syrup was pretty thick! But I only had one nice sized pancake, not a whole stack... Yay me!!! Ooh I forgot how delicious it is to add blueberries... I'm gonna buy a mess of them and freeze them in a ziplock for the autumn months ahead, when the price goes back up to 5 bucks for a half pint... Right now they're about 2 dollars for a pint...
Lunch we shared one hot dog! LOL... I owe the snack bar a dollar for it! Yeesh! LOL....
Dinner was boring. Leftover chicken.. Still, grateful to have food on my plate and I know there are others in the world who would be pleased as punch for even one good meal a day... I am jonesing for a serious big salad... Once I get paid I'm buying some nice veggies and stuff to put in it... I think I'm going to attempt to go at least two meals a day RAW fooding...

Om Shanti...
Love,
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

Don't know if you are "into" making things from scratch, but if you wanted syrup for your pancakes and wanted to avoid the sugar on N-days, you can thicken fruit juice with cornstarch. Berry juice would be especially nice. If you want a recipe for this, just holler...

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Guys! Just a quick one here, since I've gotta go to work soon...
I just wanted to let you all know that I have created a pretty good new habit. It's been a whole week since I decided to lessen the amount of sugar in my coffee... Last week I decided to try to go for one teaspoon, instead of two.. I used Reinhards method of "one plate" but applied it to "one spoon"... In the first few days I was laughing at myself, because, yes I was using one spoonful, but it was like a totally heaping teaspoon!!! Kind of like the "overloaded plate" idea... Still, each time I caught myself going back into the sugar bowl for "just a little more" (since that couldn't possibly be enough!!!) I stopped myself and said "uh uh babe, no second teaspoons!) I still put hot chocolate mix and chocolate soymilk into my coffee, but, who knows, maybe I'll be able to, in future months, attack the powdered hot chocolate...
Meanwhile, I am proud to say that I have successfully overridden the second teaspoon of sugar habit, and it's now just a "memory"... And now it's a regular level teaspoon, not a heaping one!!!
My tastebuds don't need it anymore... FYI, I used to use 4 teaspoons of sugar for about 2 years there... Yeesh!!! I had been using Splenda and Nutrasweet for many years and then when I switched back to using sugar, so I don't kill all the neurons in my brain, (only a couple die each day now! LOL...) my sweetness perception was totally screwed up....
Two packs of Splenda translated into 4 teaspoons of sugar for my brain....

Have a great day all!
Jan thanks for your syrup idea, yeah please let me know how to use cornstarch to make juice toppings.... As long as it's not unhealthy? I don't know if I'll like the way it tastes, but I'll try it sometime
See ya!!!
Peace and Love,
Deb
(boy this post was really "quick" ha ha!!!)

[margaret]

Deb, I think 175 should be your goal weight...you look darling in your photo. I've found overeating makes me feel worse, too ...but I still did it all weekend, (Very stressful time ) Enjoy your son all you can and spend every available moment with him.) RE: Peaceful Warrior...I gave it to all my nephews for Christmas one year...I'm real into creative visualization.

[Jammin' Jan]

Check the Recipe thread on the main discussion board. As long as I'm there, I'll post a recipe for "ice cream" that is not only non-dairy, but is so healthy you could eat it as part of your meal.

[reinhard]

Deb,

Great photo! If you ever put up no-s before and after photos, you're going to have to find something less attractive than that as your before

I second the 175 goal (or mini goal). You can always go farther once you're there, but a closer goal is more inspiring than a distant one, especially if it's such an obvious good in itself.

I like the application of "no seconds" to sugar spoonfuls. Good luck with that!

Reinhard

[cvmom]

Hi Deb.

I'm glad to hear that you had a good weekend. I did end up taking the 4th as an additional S day but for what reason I can't figure out. Every year we go to the same party (a friend of my husband's who has an awesome view of the fireworks in the ocean). And every year the food sucks. I mean, it is really bad. You'd think after 3 years I'd figure this out. I didn't realize that I'm such a food snob.
So, I kind of wish I'd just left it a regular day.

Speaking of photos my huband snapped one of me walking along at the park earlier yesterday. It sucked too. Here I was thinking I was looking thinner but man o man I look bigger then I thought. It disturbed me because I feel like no matter what I do I can never get this stupid weight off. It has been a month today that I have been adhering to No S. I'm not sure if I should reduce my portions or what? I know that No S is slow and steady but that photo threw me for a loop. I just wanted your opinion on this since I know that you've been a faithful No S-er for a long time.

Dru

[sibyl]

Deb I know this is your thread but if I could hi-jack it for a sec...

Don't let a picture of yourself throw you off. Lighting, the angle of your body, the angle of the camera, how the clothes you're wearing 'hung' or 'hugged' you at that moment - all of it can affect how 'fat' you look in a photograph. Focus instead on how well your clothes fit now.

Remember this isn't just for weight loss - its for good eating habits for the rest of your life. Don't give up!!

[gratefuldeb67]

Sibyl, I am not an airline, so you can hijack space here anytime, and I agree wholeheartely with what you said...
Dru, self esteem, not to sound too cliched, is an "inside job"... It is often the external things like numbers on a scale, looking in a mirror, or looking, in your case, at a photo, that we look towards for validation that we are doing well, but they are very misleading, and often will show more of the negative stuff than positive...
When I started NoS, I think it took me from Sept to around April to lose about 3.5 inches from my waist... My weight was, I thought, somewhere around 200? I really didn't know because I smashed my scale sometime around October, during a heated Shovelglove session!!! But before I smashed it, I think overall, it took me about 4 months to lose around 7 lbs... Yeah that doesn't sound so great compared to diets that will promise you that in one week... And to be completely honest, I was a bit frustrated at the pace myself... But I kept reminding myself, and Reinhard and the group helped me too, that if I wasn't *gaining* during Winter, that in itself was something to be happy with... So I relaxed a little more, and got away from that panicky state... The thoughts that I had were really bad... I kept thinking "I love NoS, I want it to work for me... But maybe it's just not going to work... etc....What else is out there that could possibly be better? I don't want to keep changing my direction, but will this work..."

I now know, (with a little retrospect,,,,)There's nothing better out there...
I will be a Nosser till the day I die, and I am proud of that!

It turns out that I just really needed to up my exercise, and a few months later I started to lose again... Back to your photo thing and my mentioning how external stuff shouldn't totally make or break you... When I got my job at NY Health and Racquet Club there were scales in every place you looked.. I avoided them for a long time... Then one fateful week I decided to see what my "real weight was"... Okay, I was expecting to see something like 200, since that was what my last (demolished) scale probably would have said... Well it said I was 213!
For a day or two, I was so down from that... What I had known as a positive experience for several months all seemed to just fade to nothingness for a few days... But then I "snapped to" and decided not to let it bother me, or make me feel bad... That number wasn't going to eradicate 8 months of hard work, and it also wasn't going to nullify the fact that I felt better, and looked better, and lost 3.5 inches...
I guess I may have been alot heavier than I thought when I started out...
Whatever... I just turned it around and kept working towards my goals...
Incidentally, it did help to have people around me say "What???? You *can't* weigh that much..." I also know that a lot of my weight is muscle... Since then, by combining NoS, Yoga, some strength training with SG and some cardio elliptical stuff (which I do if I don't have a client and it's a quiet day at the club) I have gone down another whole inch, and I am down about another 6 or 7 lbs....
Keep trying and be patient and loving to yourself... If you don't like how you look in a picture, avoid them until you feel good... Before NoS I actually covered up my mirrors in my home because I was so miserable looking at myself...
I took a drawing Richard had made me when he was in pre school and taped it up to my mirror, obscuring the reflection... Instead of seeing a sad face, I saw this message:

"Dear Mom, You are the most beautiful mother in the Universe, Love Richard and Rosalie (my mom) Feder".... It had a big crayon colored rainbow over the message...
Whenever I looked at that, I felt beautiful and I felt loved and appreciated...
Who needed that mirror?! And anyway, why be all narcissistic all the time, staring at myself! LOL...

Do whatever it takes to put your focus on your inside feelings... When you change inside, you will be able to look at the outside with a different sense of yourself...
Love yourself Dru! Don't give up! Focus on what you are doing and how you are feeling... If you know you are doing your best, whatever that is for now, no one and no scale and no picture can take that away from you!

PS... Thanks everyone for the really nice remarks about my photo!
Reinhard, I'm not sure if I'm strong enough yet to post a before pic, but a friend of mine who got married last year did have some professional ones done with Richard and myself, and maybe I'll post those....Other than when I was pregnant, they are certainly the heaviest I've been as an adult.... I think I'll be taking a new one this weekend when I go and hear my friends bands at the Riverhead Blues Festival on Friday... Let's see what happens...

PPS... If your husband wants to take your picture, he must think you look nice! Why else would he take it?...

[cvmom]

Sybil:

Thank you so much. You are right. I showed the photo to my husband and he was like, "For starters you jeans are too big." (Remember the Joe's Jeans that I spent a fortune on???) Plus, the Patriotic t-shirt that I had on was too big and billowing in the wind. Thank God we have digital cameras and we can just delete these things.

Deb, where are you? What aren't you in on this very important topic???

Feeling a little foolish (and vain) and frankly, quite rude for posting this on Deb's daily Check In!!!!

Dru

[cvmom]

Deb,

I really appreciate your response. It means a lot to me. I've never had a group of cyber friends before so I am very moved by this support.

You are right. There is no way that things are going to happen overnight. It is a process that will take a lot of time.

I am not going to throw in the towel. Doing No S is really too much fun.

Fondly,
Dru

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi Dru! I am here... I was just at work today so I couldn't write until I got home and had a much needed second cup o' Joe....
As you can see, I have been writing back an epic letter!
Love and please post on my thread any ol' time!
BTW, you had me laughing before like an idiot with that comment about how you don't know why you made yesteday an S day since the food sucks! LOL... That was priceless!
That kind of self inquiry is a good type of progress all of it's own...
Why not question these things???
You have free will so USE IT!
Next year, why don't you cook? LOL..
Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

We keep writing at the same time! Ha ha!
Yeah, me too.. NoS was my first post group and I found it to be an invaluable lifeline of support and friendship as well!
It's great!
Hugs,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Good morning friends
I've been pretty messed up the last 3 days emotionally... Last night I just screwed up my great eating big time....
I had some very unhealthy choices of foods, and also ate them at night, and even indulged in a huge S in the afternoon, a blender full of non alcoholic Strawberry Daquiris, which I shared with my son...
I was stressed and really really really sad... Over what???
Breaking off a very potentially harmful romantic relationship with someone I have already formed very genuine feelings for...
I don't think I'll go into the details here, since this is a public forum, but you all know me by now, I'm happy to share my life with you so incase anyone wants to chime in on my email and hear the gory details, you can write me off list on that.... I'm still really bumming though..
Add to that, the fact that I had to go to night court and spent an infuriating 2 hours in waiting in an attempt to have a parking ticket reduced or eliminated, and all the judge could do was knock off 15 dollars, so I'm still out 35...... The place where I live now doesn't allow any overnight parking, but strangely enough, has absolutely no signs at all on the block or nearby blocks to indicate it....
Well that's how I spent my evening... Sitting in a court with Richard instead of doing something a little more enjoyable... Rah!
The only good thing I can say about yesterday was that I did exercise for an hour.. Half on the elliptical thingy, and half and hour of Yoga all on my own in the main area of the club on their big exercise mats.... That felt pretty good... Keep in mind that a really bad evening of eating for me these days, is simply having seconds, not polishing off whole boxes of donuts or eating an entire bag of chips...
I ate some chicken wings last night and a huge salad, but then later on I had more wings.. They didn't even taste good! I'm feeling really crappy.
I've been single and not really in a relationship since my son was about 4, and it's been very hard for me... Self growth is cool and I'm sure that's why it's happening this way... Obviously God has plans for me and wanted me to focus on myself for a change... But it was such a tease to have this guy, who clearly adores me, come into my life and then, not be available... I had to break it off before it got downright toxic for everyone involved (are you starting to guess what the problem is???).
Thanks for listening friends!
I'm not going to revert to my old habits today... They just feel to yuckky!
(Before NoS this could have been three times as bad, btw...)
Peace and Love,
Deb

[sibyl]

*Hugs*
I'm sorry you had a really crappy day yesterday, Deb.
I got divorced two years ago, and haven't had a relationship since. It can be really hard and lonely and I totally sympathize.
I'm sorry you got off track, but I am glad that you realize your 'off day' was still loads healthier than similarly trying days in the past.
Besides, while I don't think every little hangnail or bad traffic jam means an "S" day, I think days like yesterday are kind of special - in a bad way - and normal rules just can't apply.
You and I both know you'll be right on track again.

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Sibyl!!!
I'm running out the door now... just wanted to say I appreciate your support here!
Love,
Deb

[JWL]

I wanted to chime in on The Way of the Peaceful Warrior. I found it to be a good read, in an alternative-thinking-101 sort of way. But its application to everyday systems is good; the message of the book is that we create ourselves, and our reality, through (among other things) what we do, which is affected dramatically by discipline.

Has anyone seen the movie What the Bleep Do We Know? There's some really interesting stuff in there about reality being plural and mutable, which comes out of quantum physics and mysticism. Very interesting film, I highly recommend it, esp for those new to thinking that way (we create our own realities).

[cvmom]

Deb:

I'm sorry that you are having guy troubles.

By putting the brakes on it now you are probably doing the best thing for yourself.

The right guy is out there you just haven't met him yet. And if you were wasting your time on this other guy then you wouldn't be open to meet the right guy.

Inner work sometimes sucks when you're doing it but you will look back and be glad; you will be stonger for it.

Sorry, my friend.

Dru

[Ariel King]

Hi Deb. I mostly just lurk in these NoS checkins but I wanted to add my condolences to the hard time you've had recently. It sounds like you did the right thing, but that doesn't make it any easier. Take care and hang in there -- I'm thinking of you! (((HUGS)))

[gratefuldeb67]

Thank you Dru and Ariel!
You are great friends
So far, today I'm feeling a little better, but only time can help me on this one...
Love,
Deb
Huge Hugs!!!

[ClickBeetle]

Hi Deb! Well, you certainly have been a great pal on this forum and I know you will continue to form relationships of affection and support whether with a romantic partner or through friendships. I know you are feeling low right now so I'll not offer much advice except to say be sure to treasure the non-romantic relationships as much as possible. They are often more truly satisfying although our society does not value or celebrate friendship and mother-child bonds nearly as much as the One True Pairing type of thing.

I know this event is particularly tough on you right now as you mentioned that this is the first real interest you have had in some time, but trust me it is no reflection on your true worth! You are a gem!!

[ClickBeetle]

Hi Deb! Well, you certainly have been a great pal on this forum and I know you will continue to form relationships of affection and support whether with a romantic partner or through friendships. I know you are feeling low right now so I'll not offer much advice except to say be sure to treasure the non-romantic relationships as much as possible. They are often more truly satisfying although our society does not value or celebrate friendship and mother-child bonds nearly as much as the One True Pairing type of thing.

I know this event is particularly tough on you right now as you mentioned that this is the first real interest you have had in some time, but trust me it is no reflection on your true worth! You are a gem!!

[gratefuldeb67]

Awwww Betsy...
That was really so sweet!
Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(I am all choking up and everything now....really!!!)
I do indeed value my friends and family, and yes they do bring me great satisfaction!

It's just really tough to turn off those feelings once they start up...
Know what I mean?
Okay... Thanks again for your support and all that good listening and feedback!!!
Do you guys take insurance?

Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Hiya friends!
Yesterday was a total blunder!!! LOL....
I guess I'm being affected more by my recent emotional upheaval than I'd like to be....
I gravitated into some old habits and chose a few unearned treats, which really shouldn't have been in the house to begin with...
Note to self:
Don't shop for food when you are feeling emotional, since you have a tendency to get things like unearned comfort foods...Then, forget it... Once it's in the fridge it will inevitably go into your mouth at some weak moment, no matter how much you try to convince yourself otherwise....

My problem was having seconds of a fairly unhealthy late lunch...
I bought white corn chips and salsa, and then to make it really unhealthy I topped it with nacho cheese sauce! Then it was too yummy and, not really substantial enough, so I had a second plate of it....
Oy vey!
Then at 2 in the morning I had two Jello pudding pops... they actually sucked! But they were there because of the previously mentioned supermarket "bad shopping choice" which I foolishly told myself, had been bought for Richard... Really, I thought they didn't taste good at all, but I assume I'm just seeking out sweet and creamy things as a placebo for the real item I am missing! Wahhhhhhh!
Alright... The madness is over, and I'm not going to go shopping for S'ses during the week any more....(please God!)
Another thing which is stressing me out quite a lot, is that we have a new manager at our club, and she is the antithesis of the exceptionally wonderful manager who was there when I got hired in April....
She is trying to nickel and dime everyone to make herself look great to the home offices. She is pressuring everyone like crazy and is, by far, the rudest person I have ever in my whole life, worked for... I've been at that club for a few months now, and I am consistently booking at least one appointment a day... For a newbie, who is just getting to be recognized by the members, I think that's only to be expected, and actually pretty decent... Plus, two of the people who came for massage with me, bought massage packages.... A package costs about 600 dollars...
Yesterday this &8$# manager had the nerve to tell me she wanted to cut my days there, for the last remaining two weeks I have this hourly pay guarantee, because she believes I'm "not booking"... Puleeese! I told her she is completely wrong, and that not only am I booking people, I'm selling packages... She's treating everyone like that....
Please!!! Send someone else! This woman has no people skills and no real experience managing a large staff...
There is a cumlative tension at work from everyone feeling bummed out that she is the new boss.... And even the members have filed a bunch of complaints.... I can't remember if I mentioned her before so if I'm being redundant sorry.... Well enough about her.. I don't want to leave my job, especially, because I am entitled to my Yoga classes, and I have a sneaking suspicion that she will be gone before I ever leave....

My Yoga teacher is away till the 14th, so I've been a little less grounded anyways... That class brings me such a feeling of inner peace and bravery to face the obstacles in life... I'm needing it now...
I'm off work today so I'm going to go to the store, and make some good wholesome choices for what to have in the house... I'm going to break with my usual habit of not wasting food and dump the rest of the pudding pops.... I'll just leave one for Richards S day....
I am sure that I'm making most of these choices from the stress of trying to forget about this guy I like... When I'm happy it's just so much easier to eat healthy and stick to NoS....
But sad or not, I'm going to adhere to the rules today, and not eat so much junk...
Good luck everyone, and thank you again for being such great pals!
Love,
Deb

[fragrantflowers]

dear deb
hi lovely one
I'm back and I found the new location
I am learning my way around and I thought I would make my first post on your daily check in
it is all looking lovely and organised
I will send a private email about what has been happening
a hint - I need some nos in my life right now
you sound as if a roller coaster has been happening in your life
think of karma - the new club manager will come back in the next life as george bush's left fingernail
she sounds vile - but just think - if the universe didn't think you were ready to learn whatever lesson this woman has to teach you
it must be very confident in your abilities cos she sounds god awful
bed time here now
lots of love to you and the sweet richie
jen star

[gratefuldeb67]

Jenstar!!!!!I was just praying last night around mid evening that you would somehow resurface.. I've sent you so many cards and letters, so maybe I just don't have your correct email...
Can you please let me know what it is at my email
deborahfederlmt@hotmail.com
I was even thinking of coming to Tasmania just to find you!
See!!! Prayer works!!!!
Love you so much Jennygirl!
Thanks for writing.. Richie is doing great!
Hugs!
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Okay, I threw away five of the pudding pops, to safeguard me ahead of time from eating them at 2 am! Yay me!!!
Breakfast was fairly "Atkins" like..
2 eggs and no toast... (but I would have had toast if there was any around! ) Two cups of joe, with 1 tsp. turbinado sugar, and about 1/3 cup of chocolate soymilk... This time *NO POWDERED HOT CHOCOLATE* Yay... Yes I increased the amount of soymilk, so maybe it's the same amount of sugar, but as far as I can tell, it's unrefined sugar in that, and the hot chocolate mix has plain refined sugar...
However don't expect me to ever post that I am drinking my coffee black.. It's just not going to happen!

For lunch I made jambalaya with sweet italian sausage, brown rice and red beans, topped off with a mess of hot sauce! This counter balanced the Atkins-like spartan breakfast...LOL.. I ate fairly late, so I was pretty hungry, but I just filled a good size bowl and I'm not at all in any need of going back for seconds...Fortunately Richard liked it, so I have a new fairly affordable meal to make for us now in my repetoire... I couldn't eat this more than once in a while though...

For dinner I plan on having a medium salad with ranch dressing mixed with some additional olive oil, and sprinkled with raisins...
I took out a few Yoga videos from the library, and a bunch of fun movies! Jan, I got the Mask of Zorro, with sexy Antonio Banderas! I can't wait to watch it... Ha ha!

I expect today to be completely NoS approved... I am not in any mood to report that I ate in the middle of the night...
Lets see, just 14 hours to our S day breakfast... I can do that!
I am back on track, after a few shaky days...Have a lovely evening all!
Tomorrow,,,,
Blueberry Pancakes will be eaten!
Peace and Love,
Deb

[Ariel King]

Great job Deb! I want some of that jambalaya... drool...

Enjoy your pancakes tomorrow!! (come to think of it, I want some of them too )

[cvmom]

Hi Deb:

I was going to suggest to you that you get some yoga videos, but see, you already did that.

I agree with you. It would be a cold day in hell before I'd ever drink my coffee black. I put a little milk in for body. In fact, it is afternoon here so I'm having one now.

Enjoy you movie. I just watched Johhny Depp on Oprah. Man is he fine.

Have a great S weekend.

Dru

[Jammin' Jan]

Deb, could you tell me something more about your jambalaya? I would like to make that.

[gratefuldeb67]

Well it wasn't totally from scratch.. I bought "Zatarains" Jambalaya mix and then just made it according to directions.. I altered it though by adding a can of red beans, sausage, and an extra few cups of brown rice which I had laying around from Chinese leftovers... You can make it with chicken or shrimp though... Or just have it veggie style...
It takes about 30 minutes to cook...
I am stuffed!
I had salad with chick peas and raisins, and a few spoons of the Jambalaya on top... With a weird but good dressing made of a few spoons of Ranch, some extra olive oil, and leftover pineapple salsa!!
My newest favorite condiment is Newmans own, pinapple salsa..
Only 15 calories for two tablespoons... Lots of flavor, not too much sugar, and some good veggies!
See ya later Jammin Jambalaya Jan!!!
Love,
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

Ooooo, I use Zatarains often. Sweet Italian sausage? I'll try that.

I'm making Red Beans & Rice sometime this week, but will use Polska Kielbasa for that. Never thought to try the Italian stuff in my Louisiana dishes.

Our son was born in Baton Rouge, and we have a fondness for that style of cooking from the time we spent there.

[gratefuldeb67]

Yesterday I screwed up...
See Peeties journal for details!
Peace out cubscouts!
Love,
Deb
Enjoy the day.. I'm gonna go to the pool later on!

[cvmom]

Deb. I just read your post about the Reese's cereal. We have that garbage here at my house too. I can't stand that stuff. It is so light that I'm finding it all over the house. I keep stepping on it and crunching it and then having to sweep it up.

If I were you, I would stop my S eating on Sunday afternoon and just have a normal dinner. That way it will balance out your Friday indulgence.

Waving to you from the other side of the pool

Dru

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Dru.. Richard and I agreed today to really ammend for the last few days of being lame on NoS... Tomorrow will be an S day, but today we are purging our NoS souls.....
From now on, this house will only harbor Muesli and other non tempting "real food" as opposed to candy substitutes....
If he wants a reeses on a Saturday, so be it... Just that cereal, and all other "fake food" substitutes like it, shall just be banned altogether!
Empty calories are not what we need... And to hell with the guilt that is attached to it...
(said with "umph"!!!)
Love and Peace,
Deb

[peetie]

Yes, Deb!!!! I am a big believer on waiting for the real thing....in food and other areas of life as well. I too have gotten caught up with fake-outs, and finally realize there's nothing like the real deal.

And the cool thing is...you CAN have the real deal, but just on the proper days.

Peetie

[Ariel King]

Hey Deb! Just a random post... I've seen you ask the question at least once of how to do the "quote" thing so the quoted text shows up in that little white box. I believe I know how to do it. First, hit the Quote button to the upper right of the post you want to quote. That will put you into a Reply box with the entire text of that post already in the box, enclosed in {quote} and {/quote} delimiters. (It actually uses square brackets, but I'm not typing those here b/c I'm afraid the browser might interpret them.) Just edit the text within the "quote/endquote" markers down to what you want, then type your answer after the {/quote} thing, and hit submit. It worked for me. HTH.

[cvmom]

Hey Deb! Just a random post... I've seen you ask the question at least once of how to do the "quote" thing so the quoted text shows up in that little white box. I believe I know how to do it.

Okay Ariel: You get the genius award for the day.

I have been trying to figure that out for awhile and I was just going to pose a "how to" question in my daily check in.

Are you psychic too????????

Dru

[Ariel King]

Wow... that's some freaky timing. Glad you found my post so you didn't have to go to the trouble of asking!

Hehe - I'm not psychic that I know of. Maybe we're just on the same brain-wavelength today.

[cvmom]

Deb Darling:

Yesterday was awfully quiet with out you! I know you are probably busy with work but when you don't post I miss you.

Hope all is well.


Dru

[Jammin' Jan]

Hey Deb,

I changed the name on my daily check-in. Thanks!

[peetie]

I'm with Dru. A nos day without Deb is like a day without sunshine! Looking forward to seeing your warm glow again!

Prune Juice Peetie

[Blondie]

Ditto. Definitely not as much peace and love in the NoS world right now.

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi Gals! Prune Juice Peetie, Dru, Jammin Jan, Ariel, Mandy...
Yo!!! How are all my homegirls today??? LOL....
I can't believe all this "where is Deb?" stuff! LOL...
I am really flattered and moved... Yeah, yesterday and most of today were soooo unbelievably stressful that I just felt to crappy to post anything other than my Yoga journal thread... My mood was low I tell you!
Thanks for all being in my corner!
I don't want to count any chickens yet, but it seems that someone from the corporate office will be visiting tomorrow to "help out", which I interpret as "determine whether new boss sucks" in person... This can't be good for her, since, I would assume, if they had any confidence in her abilties, they wouldn't be sending someone to check up on the current situation... This morning she actually took me aside and chewed me out over a five dollar difference in treatment prices... I realized then, after feeling like my blood pressure was about to go through the roof, that she is just on a micromanaging trip and *probably* enjoys getting people all p'od... I just need to maintain an even keel around her... I prayed and prayed today for help from "above" and just when I was leaving the club the assistant manager walked me down the hall and gave me the info about tomorrows special visitor.... I just hope it all works out because I am in no mood to have to start a job search again and feel that I will be able to do pretty well at this gym as the months pass and I get to treat more and more people...
So, don't fret or anything if I get a little quiet on my own check in... I'm still here and reading and enjoying everything here!
Love and Hugs to my faithful NOS friends and colleagues!!!!!
Please cross your cumulative fingers that things work out for the best at my job... I know the Lord hears our prayers...

Peace,
Deb
ps.. Still doing very well with NoS throughout all this stress... actually it makes me *not* want to eat much...

[Jammin' Jan]

Kitty picture:

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b326/ ... 45f5fe.jpg

[gratefuldeb67]

Okay! Now I've really seen it all....
A jogging cat??? LOL...
She (he?) must really be a serious "Cathlete" Huh huh....
That's about as fast as you will ever catch me jogging!
And with eye's closed, and shoes on backwards!! That must be the old "
cat sleeping impersonation" ploy!
She's (he's?) probably practicing some ancient Ninja art where you sneak up and then pounce!
We're on to you kitty!

I bet as soon as she hears the can opener she really starts to jog! LOL...
Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi everyone!
I'm Richard, Gratefuldeb's son. I just wanted to tell everyone that last year my mom could easily bend my arms, but since I have been swimming at camp, my triceps have gotten way stronger, and my mom can't bend them!!!
Have a great Summer!
Love,
Richard
P.S. Mom feels awfully embarassed right now because she can't bend my arms. SUCKER!!!

[peetie]

You Go Richard!!! Pretty soon you'll be able to bench press your mom, but be careful with her.....we all love her a lot around here.

Love,
Peetie

[cvmom]

Richard:

Camp is good for the arms. Keep on swimming.

From,
Dru

P.S. My son likes your mom's name because it reminds him of Napoleon Dynamite. I don't know if you've seen that movie, but if you haven't, the main character's best friend is called Deb.

I've got to go. The boys are calling me to show me their latest Lego set-up. Bye.

[Blondie]

Richard, I noticed the same thing when I started swimming!

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks guys for writing back!
I'm going to start a check-in of my own.
I've been doing NoS with Mom since September. We are helping each other out like a team! I'll see you on my thread I'm glad you love my Mom. I do to!
Love and good luck,
Richard

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Folks!
So ain't my son a cutie? Hee..
Anyways.. I stayed home today, as I told Peetie, to avoid more of the hideous boss.. (see Peetie's Plan)
I ate well today, and actually had a very strong appetite this morning, which is not so typical for me... We had a nice dinner tonight and I am feeling good with food... I'm expecting my monthly visitor (euphemism)
maybe tomorrow, so I'm feeling sortof washed up today.... Just bleh...
I hope my peppy happy shiny self comes back soon, and it probably will as soon as I'm done with PMS... I get so out of balance... Yuck...
Larry's coming home soon and I'm going to Yoga tomorrow...
He will definitely help my state of mind... I know that sounds so codependent, but he really does calm me so much!
My beloved Guruji!
As for tonight, I'm going to drag myself out the door soon to go and hear some music at the blues jam I like to go to...
I'll probably have either a coke or an iced tea..
Maybe I'll have a cranberry juice instead... Other than that, today was fully NoS approved!
Love to all!
Have a jammin night
Deb

[Blondie]

I hope the visitor/observer took away your yucky manager and things are better when you go in tomorrow!

Have fun tonight!

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Mandy! No such luck.. But thanks for the thought! Who knows? Maybe something will change in the future, but as of today, she was still pacing the floors...
But two days off from her helped me a lot... The Yoga helps me so much too! I wind up feeling so much better about myself and the world that I am able to see her as much less significant.. Just an annoying fly on the wall...

So, we started S'ing somewhat early today... When I was about to leave the manager told me she couldn't give me the guaranteed salary for more than two days per week for the next two weeks... (my last pay period which is under salary, not just commission...)
Well this put a dent in my plans to pay a couple of important bills.. Oh well life will go on, and I'm just glad that I had an otherwise decent day...
I'm drained from my cycle today.... Must get to a blood bank!
Actually I tried to up my iron levels a little by eating a small amount of chopped liver salad, which is very high in iron... but I'm still feeling really sapped...
When work was done I felt like I was in the Flintstones and the factory whistle just blew....
Yabadabadoo!
Then I blew my N day! LOL... I haven't done this for quite some time so I'm not really worried... And I know I have been fairly good these days overall... Some days very good... I'm going back to Yoga tomorrow too... It was pretty interesting to me that our "binge" on pure crap today, was sort of self limited.... We had a well balanced meal around 4:30 of Ben and Jerry's NY Super Fudge Chunk ice cream, some very crunchy Kettle cooked potato chips (that's the thing I chose, major need to crunch away my manager "cut my next paycheck to half" induced stress, but the ice cream was Richards request..) And another great indulgent delight which was triggered by the very hot day here,,,, Paul Newmans pink lemonade! I was so thirsty.. I had two glasses o'dat stuff!!
But as for the chips and ice cream (nice mix of food groups eh, sugar fat and salt.. All the essentials!) we really had one nice serving of each and then just stopped.... Forget it.. Last year we would have finished the whole pint of ice cream and the whole bag of chips.... That's just not my kind of eating anymore... Even thinking of stuffing till there isn't any more just makes me feel bloated and yuck... We had enough and it was enough...
I am very happy with the great changes in our attitudes and appetites this year... Very very happy!...
Going backwards, I had a nice cheapie, but tasty, salmon sushi from the supermarket for lunch, and even managed to share a few pieces with the other massage therapist who works at the club... Again... no need to overstuff myself.... Feels nice!
I'm going to have to focus on promoting my own office more than I have for the past three months, and hopefully, between that and the club I'll be able to keep afloat... It's a little nervewracking, but I am going to approach my career the way I am approaching NoS... Every little thing I do, every day will count... My business will grow and I just need to keep trying and be persistent and patient!
Hope you are all having a great day, and have nice plans to relax and S this weekend!
Peace and Love,
Deb

[cvmom]

Hey Deb!!

Kettle chips and Ice Cream are my favorite S day items. You have great taste.

I was just curious about the style of massage that you do? Is it Swedish, Deep Tissue, Shiatsu? Just wondering. I love massages and I am long overdue for one.

Happy Weekend.

Dru

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks for asking! Dru! I am trained in all those modalities... I tend to do a mix of all of it...
Most people who come to me at the club expect a Swedish massage or some deep work...
I'd say I specialize in trigger point therapy and I also like using a great esoteric treatment called Ortho-Bionomy, though to be considered an official practitioner of that I'll need some more training... That's coming up in November... That is very interesting stuff...
I love Shiatsu and wish I had more people try that out... But when I'm doing a Swedish or Deep tissue massage, I tend to stick in a bunch of accupressure points to help things along... Also a little reflexology...
Just don't ask me to do a hot stone massage... I hate doing those.. they are too busy, and there's too much disconnecting from the client when you have to get the rocks out of the water every two minutes...

Shiatsu Rocks! Go get some Shiatsu from a good therapist...
Find out if anyone out near you has ever studied Shiatsu at the Ohashi Institute... He was, supposedly, a true master...

I'm getting psyched to start promoting... I think I'll start trying to get people to try out Shiatsu...
More reason to keep studying the 5 Elements and memorizing all the points... One day I think when Richie is probably in high school, I'll probably go back and get a license to do acupuncture too...
That's a lot of studying though so it's gonna have to wait a few more years... I'm just now recovering my energy from my degree at Swedish Institute! That was completed in August 2003...
Love,
Deb

[doulachic]

Hey Deb, any advice on how to comfort a woman during her labor? Massage is the one comfort measure that I'm pretty much uneducated about, though I think I would be able to do a few things. I know that if a woman is on Pitocin, then I need to stay away from the point on the shin, but other than that do you have any thoughts on how to make her more comfortable?

Hope you don't mind me asking! I'm always looking to be more informed when it comes to the comfort of my "mommies"!

[Blondie]

Oh, Deb, I can relate to annoying financial issues--my student loans just somehow got readjusted (upward don't know how THAT is possible) and it has thrown me into a bit of a spin about my budget. Blergh.

...and just look at your situation at work as an opportunity to work on your tolerance skills--haha, you always have a great attitude, and I'm sure you have found away to keep yourself at peace at work. It's hard, though, I know, I've been there. I'm totally glad you'll be able to get back to yoga today! Serenity now.

Anway, your little splurge sounds totally manageable, and you sound pretty centered about it and pleased with your improved attitude so good for you.

Have a great Saturday!

Mandy

[ClickBeetle]

Mandy - sorry to hear about your student loans! The thing to do if yours are on a variable rate keyed to the prime rate (like a lot of people's loans) is refinance while interest rates are down thru a consolidation loan. I did mine thru College Foundation of North Carolina which is a nonprofit and had the best deals when I researched a bunch of options. I think they will do anyone's -- you don't have to be in NC. Anyway, the website is www.cfnc.org -- go to "downloadable resources", then pick "consolidation brochure". You can always re-consolidate when the prime rate goes down. (Deb, sorry to junk up your daily check-in with this info, but I thought it might help.)

[ClickBeetle]

Deb -- since I'm posting so much unrelated stuff in your check-in, I wanted to post something that's actually related to YOU and what you said (in Blondie's log-in):

I think it's equally important for people to be concerned with taking care of themselves *now* even if they aren't already giant... You know that saying, an "ounce of prevention"...

Reinhard, ... What was your motivation for starting NoS? I doubt it was vanity, and I also doubt it was pressure from the media... And I really doubt that it was your burning desire to emulate Jared from subway... You just felt tired of being "husky"... You wanted to be healthy?... Well whatever, we are all sure grateful that you created this for whatever personal reasons... Thank you so much! Hug hug hug!!!!

Having a giant "poster child" isn't going to make NoS any more "sellable"... It will appeal to people who just want to cultivate some good old fashioned willpower and discipline of the body and mind...

Terrific points ... in other words: When I'm not-snacking, not-eating-sweets, and so on ... it's not because I hate myself ... it's because I love myself!

This attitude adjustment could make the difference between feeling "deprived" and feeling dedicated/motivated to sticking to plan. ... This is also why I don't believe in diet bars and other "low-self-esteem" foods ... No-S is because we love ourselves enough to do the right thing for our bodies ... not because we hate ourselves, and want to put ourselves thru a hellish regimen of weird "diet foods" that normal people don't eat.

[peetie]

Love the term "low self esteem foods"!!!!

Peetie

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi friends
Tricia... I don't personally have any experience with working on a mom in labor, just being one (48 hours in the hospital.. oooh love those bedpans...And I really remember the epidural going in! Major shock to the system!)
My own massage therapist has helped his clients in labor though.. I will leave him a voicemail and ask for advice.. Also I'll look into it once I am back at work, where some of my texts are...
I have heard that you can turn a breach baby by holding down very firmly on the Bladder 67 point which is at the outside corners on the nail of the pinky toes... I'll see what I can discover... Wish I could tell you something now, but I'm not experienced in that arena...
I guess common sense things you could do are just hold their hand If they are able to lay on their sides see if you can give a nice low back circular massage, right over the area of the Kidneys... Rubbing the feet would probably be excellent too so they can get the benefits of the reflexes in the foot, and the added distraction of attention on their pain... Encourage them to focus on the quality of their breathing... You know, ala Lamaaz class...
Pitocin? I think that's how they induced me into labor...Can't really remember... Point on the shin? Are you referring to Spleen 6? That is a point which is supposed to tonify the spleen... One of the spleens functions is to "hold the organs upright and in place..." So a prolapsed uterus is sometimes due to Spleen imbalance...
The Spleen 6 is also a juncture known as "The meeting of the Three Yin"
This is where the Spleen, Liver, and Kidney meridians all intersect.....
Very very powerful point... Great for overall tonification of all those yin organs.... (the Yin organs are the ones which are dense, and function all the time... the Yang are hollow and only function sometimes, like Stomach and Large Intestine...)

Good luck! I'll keep you updated when more info is found!
Betsy, you can post anything you want on my check in! I'm happy to have such a nice coffee clutch of friends chatting on it
Thanks Mandy for your support and lovely words of encouragement! You are the best!
Peetie.......
Do you know that prunes are possibly the highest "self esteem foods" on the planet! I wonder if they are S'sses though? I hope not!
Hugs!
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

Deb, a question for you:

When you talk about the meridians in the post above, are these the same meridians that I learn about in chi kung practice?

[peetie]

Deb, I think that prunes are for nos days, and chocolate covered prunes are for S days.

Now, I'm laffin'. I wonder if we'll EVER get off this subject. It's just too good to let go. Bad choice of words!

Peetie

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi Jammin Gonging Jan!!!
The meridians I always speak about are specifically the accupuncture meridians which correlate to our inner organs... They are trajectories where you can directly access the given energy of a particular organ and should be flowing and balanced, but they are sometimes quite unbalanced depending on how our lives are and how our organs are functioning..
The idea behind accupuncture or accupressure is that we can either Tonify organs which may need more energy, or conversely, Disperse energy which is excessive....
There are 12 meridians... I'm not sure which meridians you follow with Qi Gong practice...
This all fits into the Daoist 5 Element model of the Body....
The idea is that we are a microcosm of the macrocosm...
Things we find in nature, are also found within our own bodies...

One preemptive clarification I will mention is that this is not Reflexology...
People seem to always ask me if they are the same... They are very different modes of treating the body, but they are similar in that we are directly working with the persons energy system, versus pure structural work...
It is also, not required that one is a Daoist or Buddhist or whatever, to embrace this system of health... To my knowledge, nothing here would contradict anybodies religions, though I think there's a lot of misunderstanding on this point, generally, with people not really familiar with the accupuncture system...

If you really want to get an in depth understanding of this stuff.. I recommend the highly reputed "The Foundations of Chinese Medicine" by Giovanni Macciocia....
He doesn't describe the points in that one, but he does explain, very thoroughly, the functional system of the organs from the TCM perspective.
Some concepts are so foreign to Westerner's in this view of the body, but he does a very good job of making it accessible.
Having a nice relaxing day!
Hope you are too!
Love,
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

Tai chi/qigong is not a religious thing for me, but rather for health and exercise. I began studying it when I was in karate class, so there was the martial aspect, too. I have read some about the meridians, but, being a restless person, I usually just get to the movin'! I always figure that if I do balanced qi programs, the meridians will take care of themselves! So far, so good.

[cvmom]

Deb:

Regarding walking: if the evenings are really beautiful right now, how about having Richard grab his scooter or bike and you try to keep up with him by walking behind him?

Sometimes, after dinner, I walk to our little village with my boys and I usually let them get a treat. (Candy, gum, icee). It may sound counterintuituve but it motivates them and it gets us out of the house. (The first part of the ride is unpleasant for them because there is a big uphill). That little round trip is about 35 to 40 minutes. I don't think it has to be a long time. It is just pleasant to have them be outside on a nice summer evening.

Otherwise, I wish we lived closer because I'd take you on a hike.

D.

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Dru! Thanks for the tip! I don't want to make the goal of the walk to go and get a treat... I used to do that when he was much younger and in a stroller... I'd end up at Starbucks or Dunkin donuts...
I never lost weight that way!!! LOL...
Seriously!
I figured out a perfect everday system which I will be doing right in my own backyard.. It's on the Urban Ranger format... (I think...)
I think the subject is "In favor of real walks..."
Love and Best to you and your fam!!!
Have a groovy California day!
Peace,
Deb

[cvmom]

Deb:

Sorry, I forgot that Richard does No S too.

Either way, you can't beat summer nights.

I hope you have a great day too. I will be very busy today. We did a big trip to Ikea yesterday as I am redoing my older son's bedroom. One advantage of years of Lego building is that my 11 year old can actually put together Ikea furniture. I am impressed!! The problem is that we needed organizational furniture to store all the legos!!!!

Happy Sunday.

Dru

[gratefuldeb67]

That's so funny Dru!
I got two chairs and a tiny cafe style table for our apartment at IKEA when we moved here.. I was like..
"Cool, these only cost 20 bucks each!" then I went to the pickup area and found out why they are so cheap!
Do it yourself assembly!!
Took me two hours
I was all screwdrivered out by the end and cursing IKEA for making my forearms very unhappy! LOL...

Have fun with your project!
Love,
Deb

[Jammin' Jan]

Deb,

Hey! You're good! How'd you figure out that I am very much Water energy? Total non-dancer, though. I think that's one reason why I like chi kung and tai chi so much...they allow me to move to music in a way that is graceful beautiful.

If your summer evenings are cool enough to walk, I say, go for it! I'd give anything to be outside right now! Just me 'n' the deer flies, strollin'along...

I think I will take your suggestion to do 14 min for my next habituation period. The temp is supposed to drop down to 80 tomorrow (where are the blankets?) so that will be a good day to begin. Thanks for the idea!

[gratefuldeb67]

When I wrote dancer type, I meant precisely, dancing which is graceful and flowing... Like ballet....
So do you tend to like to "sprawl out" on the couch, when given a chance or would you say you sit up more at "attention"?
(isn't this 5 element 21 questions stuff fun? LOL...)
Water types like to just sprawl out, like water...
This is because water "seeks it's own level" energetically...
People with strong water also have very strong "sexual/reproductive" power, or health... They tend to make babies pretty easily.. Do you have kids? I can't remember? Duh sorry.. I am so senile now!
Oh yeah, your long flowing hair is also a dead giveaway.... The health of the head hair is very much influenced by our kidney energy... (Kidney and Bladder are the Water element in our body...)
Kidney houses the "Will" and since you seem so gosh darned determined, it seemed very clear that you have very strong Water..

Glad you liked the 14 minute suggestion... I really am just ripping off Reinhard though so give him the credit.. That's what he would have said (I think! LOL... Eh Reinhard? Oh yeah, you're busy being a weekend Luddite! )
Well have a great week!!!
Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Today was weeeeeeeeirrd!!!!!!!!!!!!


It is hot as hell today and humid like you wouldn't believe!
I woke up feeling like I didn't want to make scrambled eggs, or anything requiring cooking... Had my coffee, ate part of a horrible apple (yes there is such a thing and the one I ate is it!) which was so tasteless and mealy, I just wound up chucking it.. Something I hate to do, but this was beyond terrible...
So, breakfast turned into lunch, and lunch was pretty darn late too...
I couldn't think straight after doing a fairly vigorous massage and needing some food "rapidamente!!!" and when I went to Waldbaums with a budget of less than five dollars for dinner and lunch for two people for a few days, I was crossing my brain trying to figure out how I could do this...
Being very hungry didn't help..
I wound up buying "Honey Nut Shredded Wheat"... It was on sale for only 2 dollars so I thought, "hey no hot kitchen in the morning, quick fix when I get home.."
I got home.. Poured a giant sized bowl (remember I was insane from not having food before this point) and was ready to demolish it in three seconds, but after I had maybe four spoonfuls, I just thought "This is so sweet and disgusting!!!!" and once my hunger pangs were gone, and my blood sugar returned to something more normal, I decided to just dump the other half of the bowl of cereal....
Again, my values are not normally to waste food... But I just couldn't make myself eat this stuff....
I read on someones posts (Was it Dru? Peetie? Blondie?...Hmmmmm)
that if you have less sweet stuff in your life, your sweet tooth goes away...
Wow.. this seems pretty accurate...
Yesterday, Mom gave us some fruit Sherbert to take home for our S day..
It was for Richard, and he likes it pretty well...
I tried one spoonful of it.. My eyes nearly jumped out of my head when I tasted the *extreme*, unadulterated sweetness of this stuff! I didn't like it... Could my cutting back on the sugar in my coffee for only about 5 or 6 weeks have influenced my taste perception of "sweet" that much??? Seems so! So this is awesome, and I am thrilled to say, in regards to sweet stuff, I really have much less of a taste for it...
(But I wouldn't turn down a fresh brownie with vanilla ice cream and caramel sauce on top if you happened to have one for me this weekend! LOL...)
Well, off to dinner!
I'm soooo hungry! LOL......
I'm going to chew every bite 21 times (as a salute to NoS habits.. Ha ha!)
Tomorrow I will be prepared and I will have leftovers for breakfast as Rumba suggests! Yay Rumba!!!!
Love,
Deb
Oh Yoga was very good today... Lot's of sweat pouring down my face!!!!!
Tons of stretching... Loads of relaxing!
Yoga rocks and so do I!!!!!
(and you guys too! hee....)

[Jammin' Jan]

5 Element 21 Questions: I always start out sitting up straight, but then the feet go up on the footstool, the books spread out around me, then the feet go up on the couch and there I am, spreading out all over the place!

We have two kids, and they didn't come quickly. Seems the only time I got pregnant is when we moved to some third world country where we took cold showers and ate lots of rice. I am convinced that this is a cure for infertility...

You certainly did have a very weird food day! And yes, cutting back on the sugar in your coffee for just this short time will alter your perceptions of sweetness.

Glad you are enjoying the yoga so much. It's so good when we find something that "fits". I get too restless in those static positions -- I have the same problem with static chi kung, too -- so I guess tai chi and moving chi kung is a good fit for me. But yoga is a wonderful physical exercise, both for flex and strength.

Well, this is a lot of rambling! Hope you finally found something yummy to eat today. See ya.

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Jammin "sprawlin" Jan!
Wow, Rice and cold showers??? I thought cold showers were what you did when you didn't want to make a baby! LOL....
But hey, they throw rice at weddings, so maybe it's some kind of lucky grain!
I am very stuffed now... I had seconds, can't lie... I still am counting today as a success.. a weird one, but still a success..
The seconds I had tonight, countered the total lack of breakfast, and almost lunch too....
My favorite comfort food.. Hamburger helper, cheeseburger flavor, with not as much meat as called for (due to necessity) and I added a bunch of frozen corn niblets... So it was indeed a starchfest, but I don't care!
I feel much better...
Won't let this happen tomorrow regardless of the weather.. I felt super messed up...
Incidentally, my Yoga teacher does much more of a dynamic flow... We almost never just hold a pose for more than 15 or 20 seconds.... Always moving and breathing!!!
It's working for me for sure!
Glad you are loving your tai chi!!!
Peace and Love,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Oh, tonights "dessert" is watching The Beatles movie A Hard Days Night!
They still are my favorites (besides the Dead of course, and maybe Dylan...)
This movie is awesome!
Love,
Deb

[ClickBeetle]

Deb, you're a hoot and a half!!

when I tasted the *extreme*, unadulterated sweetness of this stuff! I didn't like it... Could my cutting back on the sugar in my coffee for only about 5 or 6 weeks have influenced my taste perception of "sweet" that much???

Yes!!! It has already happened to me for sure. Last night I had a big slice of pound cake I'd saved all week as a weekend treat. But it was too sweet, overall -- the cake part would have been fine all by itself, but I would say with the icing it was just too much all at once. So weird! Same thing with some fruit yogurt I had a couple of weeks ago -- standard-issue fruit yogurt in a cup, way too sweet for me! I was like, geepers, do they just put a quarter-cup of strawberry jam down in the bottom, here?

I read on someones posts (Was it Dru? Peetie? Blondie?...Hmmmmm) that if you have less sweet stuff in your life, your sweet tooth goes away...

I can't remember either, 'cause my memory is shot (at all of age 38 ) but it seems like a bunch of people on here have made that same observation ... !

[Ariel King]

Hi Deb! Sorry you had such a weird, hungry day - shopping for food on an empty stomach and near-empty wallet sounds like a Herculean task! But you made it through ok. Maybe Richard can eat the cereal if you don't like it. Also, I'm sure you know this, but dried beans & rice are super cheap and pretty good for you as well. Anyway I'm delighted to hear your sweet tooth is shrinking! Mine has just been growing for years, so I'm trying to get it under control before it reaches walrus-tusk proportions. Hang in there Deb, hope today is a steadier and calmer experience!

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Ariel!
Well, I just completed a major project for the day...
I installed a large room unit air conditioner in our cottage...
For the past two or three days, I've been unable to sleep, and waking up in a pool of sweat.... It's not too comfy sleeping on a drenched pillow and sheets, so I decided to just bite the bullet and bring in the ac until this humid spell passes...
I'm tired!!!!!!!!!!
I had to unearth it at my Moms house.. It was under loads of junk in her garage... Then I singlehandedly carried it out to my car and then carried in to my place... Fortunately we don't have any stairs.. If we did, I wouldn't have tried this as I'm guessing the ac weight around 75 or 80 lbs... I was breathing like in Yoga!!!! I moved very slowly and deliberately and prayed to God that I woudn't drop it or pull out my back...
Deb is a Mighty WARRIOR!!!!!!!
LOL
Then I ingeniously installed it into a window which didn't really fit the AC shape... But I worked it out by shoving a few pieces of wood I had around, inbetween the frame and the ac... Then I took bubble wrap and sealed all the gaps and finished the bastard with a mess of duct tape! It's ugly as heck to look at, but I don't think Richard will complain much, and he and I are the people who'll be looking at it! LOL....
Now I just have to be able to pay that electric bill... Without the AC I had about 30 dollars average electric! LOL... I'm expecting a sharp increase on the next bill! Oh well, losing sleep is totally unacceptable, and I know I will function better during the day if I am not tossing and turning in puddles of perspiration at night... Normally I don't love AC and I know it's not good for the environment, but something just had to give....

Now I'm about to reward myself with a lovely cup of Martha Stewart ice tea, with tea cubes!!! LOL...
PS... It's actually really good that way... No watering down the taste..
And a nice caffeine buzz to boot!
I'll be posting more tomorrow, my arms are about to fall off my body they are soooooo tired!!!!!
Oh also, I noticed that sweetie Peetie wrote to my Richie, I'll make sure he reads his post later this evening... I think he will be happy he got an email! Thanks Peetie!!!
Okay, where's that tea?
Love,
Deb

[ClickBeetle]

Deb, that is quite an accomplishment! I am glad you didn't strain your back! Very resourceful, the way you fit it into the window opening.

Enjoy your iced tea ... sounds like you have earned it!

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey Betsy!
Carrying that heavy ac, for that short time has my biceps totally screaming at me!!!
Thanks for your congrats and concern... My back is excellent.. I really think all the Yoga had prepared me for that... Plus I am very aware of how not to move (ie lifting with bent back, etc...)
Ooh but my arms,,,,,
Mama, they are wiped out! But I really feel great that I did it!
The room is so comfortable now... very cool! LOL.....

See ya later Beetle girl!

Love,
Deb

[Ariel King]

OMG Deb, I can't believe you've been living w/o AC all this time! That sounds like cruel and unusual punishment to me. Enjoy your new climate control, which you have certainly earned, and don't guilt yourself over it. There are plenty of other ways to be environmentally conscious without torturing yourself. *hugs*

[gratefuldeb67]

Thanks Ariel!
Hey, I'm Jewish... Guilt is genetic!
I'm feeling pretty guilt free though right now...
Aaaaahhhhhh!!!!!!!

Hugs back!
Deb

[ClickBeetle]

Grateful Deb is cool as a cucumber!

[peetie]

Oye, Deb, so am I!!! That's why our children are NOT allowed to grow up and leave their mothers!!!! Although mine did end up getting married and turned down my offer for them to live with me throughout eternity!!!! Emailing to your Richie is a pure delight. What a nice young man you have there.

And lugging that a/c unit definitely counts as major exercise. I love it when we do something constructive and a side benefit is a good workout. Not just working out to burn calories, but to actually get something accomplished. That's the way it was in the olden days before all our modern conveniences.
Now exercise tends to be something we have to deliberately "get".

Enjoy the guiltfree, cool air. Feeling guilty about not secumbing to heat exhaustion is NOT appropriate guilt. Save those guilty feelings for when you earn them!!!!

Peetie

[gratefuldeb67]

Yes Betsy, I shure is cool like a cucumber!
I even bought a cucumber this afternoon, to help me stay cool and cucumber like..... Really!
Peetie,,,,
So, "Nu?" Ver's my prune juice!??? Oy Gevalt!!!!"
Thanks for the compliments on Richie! He is very special! I know I got really lucky!
I've been really lame about putting some new stuff on the computer... I do have some photos of him from a few years back though... I don't know how to post them, without some kind of photo bucket thingamagiggy
but if you like, I can email a few to you if you write me at my normal address... Just can't get them on the board at the moment...
But he's changing rapidly!
PS.. How did you know I was planning on having him live with me forever? LOL...
I am determined though, not to ever utter the words,,,
"So,,,,,,how come you never call????"
Okay, I'm pooped now... All that good *real* working out, especially in the heat, has had it's effect on me.... I came down from the "pumped up" feeling about an hour ago, and you could describe me as "squashed down" right now.. LOL...
I don't think I'll be raiding the fridge tonight (besides all there is is 1/4 cup of salsa, 1/2 cup of soymilk, and 3 sticks of celery! Not exactly "raid" instilling food.....
I'm sure I'll be totally crashed out...

Good night!!!!!!!!!
LOL....
Love,
Deb

[peetie]

Too Funny, Deb. My daughter and I often start a conversation with, "You never write, you never call." Oh. these stereotypes die hard, so we may as well laugh at 'em!

Peetie

[navin]

Deb-

Well, I'm impressed with the A/C thing. Those things are hard to lift and move around... big, heavy, and awkward. Not to mention actually getting it in the window...

I always wonder why more places don't have geothermal A/C. It does use a fan, but that is the only energy being used - it works a lot like a car's radiator, transferring heat with the cool deep in the earth. That is the main disadvantage though is you have to have these big-donkey pipes drilled deep into the ground. But once it's in, it works great. Yeah, ask your landlord about getting that installed.

[gratefuldeb67]

Navin, that was my second choice!
Love and Donkey Pipes,
Deb

[gratefuldeb67]

Hey folks! What's up yall's!!!!!
Well, the ac sure has helped my state of mind and body... Was rested today. Enjoyed the morning... Had some coffee....
Aside from some passing "unholy" thoughts about sending my new manager to visit Corey for a professional consultation about buying a burial plot *cuz I'm gonna kill her!!!!!!*,,,
I had a good day! LOL...
It was a total NoS success!
Did a little on the elliptical thingy before work, but my arms and shoulders were still too wobbly to do much else today after yesterdays "real work" ac installation "scenario"...(wait that was real not a scenario!!!! )

Also, incase anyone has been vicariously getting their thrills through my recent romantic disaster (lol) hinted at on Navins checkin,,, in my defense, I have to say, I only dented a home... Then I went to find a vacant lot at a trailer park!
Too bad for me, in recent years, I have had to live with a different kind of NoS for a little too long for any person to stay sane!

Surprisingly, I haven't plowed through 20 pints of Chocolate Haagen Daaz since then... But this weekend I will for sure!!!
(well not 20 pints.. maybe 19!)
Have a great night yalls!
Love and Peace,
Debster

[gratefuldeb67]

Hi friends
I'm feeling rather depressed today... Just one of my lows I guess...
Worried about a lot of stuff recently... Wish I could just be my fun (other) self!
Mainly I am feeling financial pressure big time (but being lonely isn't helping either...)
I have to say my eating structure has "bent" somewhat these last few days, in a way that, also, doesn't make me too happy... Small stuff over all, like a few virtual plating scenes, and one late night snack of a kids pack of Ritz cheese crackers... (wow those are really garbage! LOL But that's the only thing I had around last night... )
I've been waking up not wanting to do much other than immediately get the pot on the stove for coffee, and I've been eating my breakfasts at a time which would be more appropriate for lunch... Last night before I went to sleep I wound up eating the celery sticks and peanut butter which I forgot to bring to work with me for breakfast... Yes it was technically the same amount of calories I would have had, only shuffled around timewise, but it was also after dinner, and I really wasn't hungry.. Just eating to "finish them off", and old crappy standby euphemism for "opportunistic eating"...
After being a Nosser now for nearly 11 months, this just felt plain bad to do... My habit brain wouldn't even allow me to enjoy the good taste of that healthy snack... (and boy, after all the cutting back on sugar, that peanut butter tasted about as dessert worthy as it gets! Weird!!! LOL )
I did a little "Sibyl" and just got more depressed by my poor "plating"/meal planning for the day, and I'm sure that just led to my "throwing in the towel" attitude when I gave myself permission to eat the ritz bits things at 12 midnight!...
Blah...
I think the reason why we feel so inclined to beat ourselves up is this...
Our diets represent our degree of control we have over our lives... Same thing with scales... If we can control our bodies, and get the scale to agree with our plan to control our lives *via our diets/exercise/insert other seemingly "controllable" factor" then it's a way of convincing ourselves that we must be "okay"...
I think this is where the big letdown comes... We feel like we can't control our lives...
Well, unfortunately, or fortunately, we really can't control everything, and for me, that is sometimes overwhelmingly frightening...
I love my career, but unlike a more predictable job, mine has loads of uncertainty, and I'm the kind of person who absolutely feels like my life is in turmoil when I don't have some stability...
Just to give you guys an idea of what I'm dealing with, I have to figure out how to feed both my son and I with a budget of less than fifty dollars a week, and who knows what that will be now, since my temporary salary is finished at the gym, and now I'm back to working for straight commission... So far, I only had one treatment at the gym, and so that translates into a thirty dollar paycheck... It should pick up sufficiently though, as perhaps Summer is slowing the attendence down a bit... Heck it's only my third month working there...
I'm going to have to shop wisely and practice my budgeting...
Well sorry if this was a bit depressing to read.. I know you all have similar challenges...
It's nice to be able to have a couple hundred cyberhands to hold through these times of worry..
Thanks for listening everyone! I feel a little better already!
Do you take insurance?
Peace and Love,
Deb