Newbie not losing! Help!

pangelsue · Post by **pangelsue** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 2:42 pm

Being a newbie (3 weeks), I have been reading all of your wonderful and helpful information and learning a lot of information that keeps me going. I am really sticking to the N day routine and trying hard not to overdo too much on the S days. I do indulge on the S days because they make the structure on the N days tolerable. To date I have lost only a half pound and because I have spent most of my adult life (I'm 60) dieting, I am getting the "this isn't working" syndrome. I have tried a million diets. My friends tease me because I buy every new miracle diet book that comes out They know that if they want to know more about some kind of diet, they can probably find a book about it in my "library". Because my husband and I love to cook, collect recipes and rarely make the same thing twice, counting anything has been a nightmare. In the past, I have purchased software, that I used to type in recipes to find out calories, fat, carbs, points or whatever else I was counting at the moment. Boring and awful.
Also, we have a fairly large group of friends and we spend a lot of weekends eating out or at each other's houses. There is no way to know the ingredients they used so again counting anything just never worked. With all of the diets I have been on, I have been losing and gaining the same 5 pounds for about 5 years now. What I lose during the week, I'd gain on the weekends.

This diet has been a Godsend. No counting, no giving any specific food up. I thought I could never live without snacking but I am making it just fine on N days. My weekends are relaxed and I can eat what others are eating. I want this to work so badly because it is the first diet ever that fits into my lifestyle.
So...if I'm very good during the week and I don't think I am going nuts on weekends. Why am I not losing more? Or do I just need patience and perseverence?

schmiddtty · Post by **schmiddtty** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 3:52 pm

Hi there and welcome!!

I am in your same boat, but I have been at this for over 2 months now. The group has tried to analyze why I haven't lost much weight..the same 4 lbs. keep going back and forth. Finally this weekend the "no loss" syndrome got to me and I went all out starting on Fri. I could feel myself slipping all week, but let loose on Fri.

I do intend to get back on the wagon tomorrow, Monday. I can't explain other than to assume that perhaps even though I measure as mildly obese on the bmi scale, there isn't that much to lose, so it is going to be painfully, frustratingly slow.

I do think that it will keep me from gaining, which is good in and of itself. Weight loss aside, the program has resulted in my control over food which is a true victory by itself. I, like you, love this program. Let's hang in there!!! MJ

pangelsue · Post by **pangelsue** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 4:40 pm

Thanks for the commiseration. I have about 50 pounds to lose. I agree totally that the best thing that has happened so far is that for the first time in more years that I can remember, I am not in terrified awe of my ability to obsess about food and my next meal. It was nothing for me to snack right up until we left to go out, eat a large meal and come home feeling vaguely hungry. I felt utterly out of control and yet I feel that even at my size, the weight I am represents a lot of self control. I found the No S sight several years ago and dismissed it because I thought there was no chance at all that I could ever go 4 or more hours without eating something. The last three weeks have shown me that I could be in control and that news is the best news I've had in a very long time. You are also dead right that no gain is a good place to be. But loss would be soooooooooo nice. I really need to succeed at some weight loss to add to the feeling of being in control.
From what I read from some of the other people who offers their thoughts and experiences here, the weekends are open to interpretation and are pivotal to success. I am afraid to limit them too much at this point because they are on my mind at lot by Thursday. I feel the need to get rid of some cravings before Monday but I hear from them that self regulation is the key to this plan. There is no getting away from self control is there? Maybe I just want too much too soon. Maybe I need to get the N days feeling good before I should try to tackle controlling the S days??? Impatience again. A problem of mine.

Laff · Post by **Laff** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 5:55 pm

I have been working at this plan since the beginning of January. Have I lost weight --- no. Have I gained weight --- no, which is HUGE!! Like you, I have nearly 50 pounds to lose. I will share my insights as to why I haven't shed any pounds. First and most important I have done very little exercise due to a recurring back problem. I did manage to get on my exercise bike 3 days last week and plan to make it 4 this week. Once the snow and ice leave I will try walking outside. Secondly, I have not yet got a handle on S days and I know that I make it more of a celebration than a regular day. My goal is to get a grip and know that I don't have to eat a week's worth of treats in 2 days.
I know I can do this and I am sure you can too. Best of luck with it.

schmiddtty · Post by **schmiddtty** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 6:12 pm

Looks like we've got our own little support group going here: No Loss on No S!! However, I like Laff, tend to do more than light snacking on S days. This, combined with minimal water drinking may be adding to my negligible weight loss.

I was exercising faithfully 4-5 days a week, (mild climate = walking) but recently due to family emergencies (now resolved) got out of the exercising habit. As always, very difficult to resume.

It's actually comforting to me to find at least two others - Laff - we've been on for almost exact amount of time, with similar results. I do want to stay on No S, but as I expressed in my last post, I have been discouraged this past several days to the point of breaking on Friday and eating everything in sight. I did not curb my weekend, though, with the plan of resuming No S on Monday.

Good luck to all. MJ

gratefuldeb67 · Post by **gratefuldeb67** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 7:14 pm

With all of the diets I have been on, I have been losing and gaining the same 5 pounds for about 5 years now. What I lose during the week, I'd gain on the weekends.

And,,,, not changing those intrinsic habits you need to change..
So it's wasted energy and those diets are producing a real up down rollercoaster in your life and mind...

I'm very good during the week and I don't think I am going nuts on weekends. Why am I not losing more? Or do I just need patience and perseverence?

Yes you do... This isn't a three week miracle plan which will lose you ten pounds in ten days...
But congratulations on being on plan for three weeks! That's great!
You are off to a great start! Change your mindset.... Seriously...
If you only lose half a pound, but don't gain it back, then think where you will be in a year from now, not three weeks..
It is working.. You aren't going up in weight.. This is just slower, but it's maintainble for life.. Those pounds lost will never come back to haunt you unless you cave in to binge eating and totally give up on NoS permanently..
You are off to a good start!
Give up your old ideas of how quickly we should lose weight on those quick fix diets.. That's all a load of "Beep!"...

Don't give up... See if you can get out and walk and drink more water..
Those are very helpful for cranking up the metabolism...

I started NoS in the 230 range.. I am now very strong since I have been practicing Yoga and Shovelglove (and soon to happen Urban Ranger now that Spring is coming!) and I am now down to 205...
People in my life who haven't seen me for long periods of time, have all said I look like I lost even more...
Sometimes I don't lose anything for long periods of time, but I never gain..
Then "bam" I'll drop a little more weight... And keep it off..
My ultimate goal is to wear a size 32 pants and be somewhere in the 150 -170 range... I know I will get there, and there is no rush needed!

Good luck Pangelsue!
Peace and Love,

Deb

ceu · Post by **ceu** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 8:11 pm

nice post deb.

Kevin · Post by **Kevin** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 12:32 am

Very nice post, Deb.

There's two sides to this equation, eating, and exercising. Do you need to do some exercise? Walking is best, in my opinion.

I lost a lot of weight fairly quickly, but then, I snacked *constantly*. When I cut out snacks, I cut out at least 30% of my calories by my calculation.

And if you are exercising, are you considering that even by walking you could have put on some muscle mass in the three weeks you've been on the diet?

Stick with it. If you aren't exercising, add some if you can.

Good luck to you!

Post by **reinhard** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 1:16 am

Sue (and schmiddtty and Laff and other slow-essers),

I would be very careful tinkering with S days. As you point out, they're a very necessary reward to look forward to and motivate you throughout the week. It's important to keep them free and rewarding. Some people here have successfully tightened up the meaning of "sometimes," but I think there are less risky steps you should try first.

As Deb and Kevin point out, it may be less risky/expensive for you to apply a little pressure from the exercise side of the equation than by pushing harder on diet. If your current implementation of no-s easily and pleasurably keeps you from losing, it might be safest not to mess with it at all, but just exercise a wee bit more.

There are also less radical diet steps you can take than adding S day restrictions. For one, take the active reward approach to S days. Plan in advance and get a generous but discreet quantity of the treat you most want. It's a pleasure in itself, and thus really, deeply satiated, you preempt opportunistic urges. And keep your N-day meal time eating framework. Allowing yourself S days treats doesn't have to mean total chaos.

Patience is important. If you had enough, it would probably even be sufficient -- your weekday habits really do start to carry over after a while. But I understand that patience is difficult without the reward of seeing at least some quantifiable results. I hope something mentioned (or soon to be mentioned) in this discussion tips the scales at least enough to make that patience possible.

Best,

Reinhard

doulachic · Post by **doulachic** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 4:44 am

I have found that when i try to "restrict" my S days, my old "diet" mentality comes roaring back....in other words, i feel like i am being deprived, so i tend to eat MORE on those S days than i would have if i had just taken the durn S day for what it was intended for to begin with...Does that make sense?

however i have learned from this....N days are for the week, S days are to enjoy for the weekend (or other special days

). i am not going to mess with this philosophy again....i only confuse myself!

pangelsue · Post by **pangelsue** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 5:54 am

Thank you everybody for your thoughts and suggestions. They helped a lot. I have always sabotaged myself in the past probably because then I had an excuse to toss the current diet out. I like this one. I want it to work and maybe part of me is afraid it will. Had an ice cream bar and am looking forward to another Monday. I am reminded of a story about boundaries and limitations. There once was an experiment with a children's playground. At first it was not fenced in and the children were frightened and tended to play only in the center of the playground for fear of what would happen if they got too close to the road and traffic. Then the city fenced in the playground and the children felt free to spread out and use every inch because they knew the entire playground was safe. That is how N days are starting to feel. They feel good. The fenced in area is created by me and it is under my control. I can explore the entire playground in safety.
Thanks again all and good night. Happy Monday.