Morning tea

ammara · Post by **ammara** » Mon Aug 11, 2014 8:42 pm

I have been invited to morning tea. It's going to be on a Wednesday - so not an S day.

How do people cope with social events like this? Make it an S day and enjoy?

Maybe if nothing else becomes an S day between now and then I could?

Or I could swap it for a weekend day?

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Mon Aug 11, 2014 10:17 pm

Don't swap it for a weekend S day. What you do is up to you, but I tend to look at how often something like this is going to occur. If it occurs less often than once a month, I would go ahead and enjoy it.

Also, make just the tea an S, not the whole day.

Over43 · Post by **Over43** » Wed Aug 13, 2014 3:51 am

It is a social event. Being sociable is probably better for you than worrying about an S Day, or a No S Day.

ammara · Post by **ammara** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 6:34 pm

Disaster!

All has been going really well. Am on day 15 of my first 21 day challenge and it has been going really smoothly. Yes some piled high plates but no binges.

Today I had a social event. It was at my house. I had decided that I would just have tea and eat the snacks for lunch and not have the chocolate cake at all. Wouldn't have been a healthy lunch but would be one plate. I had also kind of accepted that if that didn't feel feasible when I got there I would make it an S day and enjoy it.

In the morning I weighed myself and I was up a little. Two days ago I was 2 pounds lighter than when I started. Yesterday it was up slightly and today it was at my starting weight. I felt quite down about this. Even though I knew it would be water weight and even though I know I shouldn't really weigh myself daily (can't seem to help it).

Anyway, got to the tea and I managed really well. Just had a cup of tea. Didn't need to make it an S day. Then for lunch I ate the snacky stuff with a salad. Felt good.

All day the rest of the chocolate cake was calling to me, and I resisted...until dinner. Had my usual dinner and after it I succumbed. Had the cake, a few left over crisps, more cake, chocolate. Tried to circumvent with a milky drink but still managed ice cream after.

Was feeling a bit rough - maybe something to do with the fluid. The weight gain, however much I explained it to myself, did make me feel really down and like I had failed and would never succeed.

I shouldn't weigh myself I know. But it's a habit for at least 15 years...

Am going to mark this as an S day - am I not allowed 2 apart from the weekends?

And will carry on.

Was starting to feel down that the weight wasn't going down but had decided to give it at least a month ...

The positives so far - feel so much more in control around food, feel free of thinking about it constantly, feel like I could eat like this forever...

Onwards and upwards!

Blithe Morning · Post by **Blithe Morning** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 7:54 pm

Suggestion: if you weigh everyday pay attention to the trend line, not the daily variation. A minimum number of sample points is 30 to get an idea of what is going on, so wait till a month is over till you plot your trend line.

There are several older posts where people showed their weight loss over time using a trend line. IIRC, there were some real rollercoaster days.

It's up to you how many non-weekend S (NWS) days you take. Some people only have them for special events such as birthdays or holidays. Some take two regardless.

aspencer27 · Post by **aspencer27** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 9:28 pm

Good for you for getting back on track! That is the most important part of this process, and in my opinion, the hardest. So, you had one day that was off - you've been doing this for 15 days already, and you have less than a week to finish off your 21 day challenge. Go you!

This system isn't about perfection - we aren't ever going to be perfect, and we shouldn't measure ourselves on perfection. Mark it as an S Day, and move on.

ironchef · Post by **ironchef** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 11:16 pm

Agree very much with aspencer and Blithe Morning. Anyway, you've marked it, it's in the past. The great thing about No S is that success is only ever 1 meal away.

Just want to add that the "average of 2" NWS days was just that - a rough average that has been talked about. As in, if you are not losing or maintaining as you'd like, and your Habitcal shows consistently more than 2 a month, maybe have a look at things (i.e. are you setting the "special" bar too low?) It was never meant to be a hard limit of 2 x NWS days each month. For example, in April I have: my MIL's birthday, my birthday, my wedding anniversary and often Easter as well! I'm never going to just have 2!

eschano · Post by **eschano** » Thu Aug 21, 2014 9:26 am

That is so normal to give in

I did the same yesterday. I was at a training day and was offered sweets 6 times (not kidding!) including having some cakes and sweets in front of me (in the middle of the table we were sitting at) all day. I did really well until I went home in the evening and my boyfriend had nipped into a new sweetshop and brought home some sweets as it made him feel like a child and me to. I ended up having 5 sucking sweets. Amazing and not a disaster but it proves once more:

willpower is a limited source and the more control you have over your environment the better. I usually get offered sweets once to twice a day and it's not a problem but yesterday was too much. That's ok. It's not the norm and neither is your tea. It doesn't happen every day so no need to even think about it!

ammara · Post by **ammara** » Thu Aug 21, 2014 6:08 pm

I suppose I should do no S as best as I can without beating myself up and see what happens - maybe for a couple of months?

And then see what the scales say?

I was feeling anxious about how much weight I was (not) losing too and thinking how can I possibly lose weight on such a plan.

Need to give it a chance. Am not a patient person...

Thanks for all the comments.

Blithe Morning · Post by **Blithe Morning** » Thu Aug 21, 2014 6:25 pm

The literature (and I use that term loosely) about losing weight or even health in general rarely supports the slow and steady.

Lose weight FAST!

Ten pounds in TEN days!

Blast away pounds!

And so forth. (sigh).

Best to just forget all that. Read magazines and websites about gardening or birding or Morris dancing or ANYTHING other than diet and health. The world is a great, big, beautiful place with plenty of lovely things to look at and think about.

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sun Aug 31, 2014 7:01 pm

I second the motion to not beat yourself up or call slips a "disaster." The less negative energy around fails, the better. That's not just my opinion. It is backed by habit change study.

And if you can't weigh without all the drama, let it go, too.

Just keep going.