Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 3:52 am Post subject: Returning! Again...
I almost did not post because I felt shame that I'm coming back after joining a few years ago, dabbling in other things (intuitive eating, Gillian Riley, Intermittent Fasting, Macro-counting, calorie counting).... coming back for a second, and then abandoning ship again. But I'm throwing away that shame feeling!
I'm not in a [i]terrible[/i] place with food, but have established unfavorable habits that I can't quite shed and really bug me. I can eat the 3 meals/day (good, satisfying, yummy and healthy meals), but then talk myself into a cinnamon bear. Then a handful of cinnamon bears, then a snickers, then bowls of cereal. You get the picture. It goes on...
All to start again the next day.
I'm frustrated because I vacillate between the thoughts
--"you don't have to lose weight, so don't worry about it...a little treat everyday is fine" and
"but I hate how I feel dependent on candy and/or sweets and have no control at night and go to bed feeling sick...this isn't normal.".
So I'm back. I've noticed that I feel a real sense of deprivation if I can't have a little candy after dinner (even if it turns into a LOT). I don't really even savor it, but pound it down handful after handful. I'm pretty sure I'm using it to cope with my hardest time at night...putting kids to bed, doing homework with kids, etc. It does feel like an actual drug, actually.
Oh, and I should mention I'm 25 weeks pregnant with a "surprise" 5th baby...I know I know...CRAZY RIGHT?!?!? It's a GIRL after FOUR boys, though, so YAY!
I feel great, am past the terrible nausea, and am doing lots of Yoga and walks, and even skiing every Saturday with my boys.
Just want to say "HI" and sorry that I ever left "NO-S". Will you forgive me?
It just feels right to be here, even if I haven't been following the principles fully yet.
XOXO _________________ Liz
Joined: 06 Oct 2008 Posts: 7955 Location: San Diego, CA USA
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 8:01 am Post subject:
OMgosh, Liz, your FIFTH baby? Of course we welcome you back and no forgiveness needed. Forgive yourself!
Something that has helped me is knowing that sugar has been a common commodity for only about 300 years, which means that humans lived quite well, even rich ones, without intense sweet very often.
And don't compare yourself to those sisters of yours.
NO ONE has an advantage by being able to eat sugar often, IMHO. Limiting it is no guarantee to prevent some maladies, but your odds just have to be better.
And there's nothing like a string of failures to galvanize a final effort.
Any chance you'd be willing to cross post on this thread especially for humble returnees?
https://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=10878 _________________ Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8
Welcome back Liz! And congrats on baby #5!! I have 3 boys and a girl (she is my youngest) and it is absolutely the most fun thing ever to have a daughter especially after several boys. I'm SO excited for you.
I can totally relate to your post...it's as though I could have written it myself! I certainly don't have the answers but I know these boards are so supportive and just glad to have you back! I've been back and forth many times too...I just can't seem to give up on No S because I really think it's the only sane and sustainable way to eat. This time around, I'm not going to log anything or keep track of my habit...simply because it sets me up for failure. I'm a perfectionist unfortunately and this time around, I just want to be kind with myself and not judge.
Thank you for your kind words and welcomes! It feels good to be among "friends" who get it.
Oolala: it makes a lot of sense when you say that sugar hasn't been around forever, the hold it has on me and all of us. It really is so cultural that we need treats and desserts every day. It's all around us and people are constantly giving my kids and myself treats, which is fine, but I'm realizing what a staple it is in my life!
My kids even think that after every basketball game or swim meet or tennis match, they deserve a run to the convenience store for a candy bar...and I use it as reward at the end of MY day, too!
Moderatemeals: you relate! I'm so glad you have a girl after all those boys! I'm excited for a girl, but still terrified of 5 kids! But, we feel good about it and have a bit of a break with our youngest being 4, so I have helpers. My 12-year old babysits a lot and my husband is finally home a lot more. We can do this! I think!
Stay in touch! xo _________________ Liz
I wonder if you could try a shift in your nighttime snack--maybe a piece of fruit instead of candy? Or maybe sometimes a cup of decaf tea? And gradually wean yourself off of the candy fix. A little extra fruit might not be a bad idea with your pregnancy right now anyway. _________________ Homeschool Mom and No S returnee as of 11-30-15.
28.5 lbs. down, 34.5 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
"...slim cultures...value not overeating. They don't eat more of a food just because it's good. They enjoy the food more."--Oolala
Congratulations on your daughter! I always ate like a construction worker when I was pregnant.
And don't be embarrassed...many of us left and came back again. It's my third time. The posters here are kind and understanding. _________________ "Never go back for seconds. Get it all the first time." - Garfield
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