Bluebell's check in

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Oct 18, 2017 9:29 pm

Yesterday and today, success. I baked some cookies today and managed to avoid putting any in my mouth! On the down side I did have a plate full of veggie pizza for my dinner, it really should have been half a plate of pizza and half salad. Sigh. My willpower deserted me.
Have been maintaining my 28lb loss without any real feeling of hardship so that is a huge positive.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Oct 19, 2017 8:42 pm

Well despite the pizza and my time of the month, I have dropped another pound. Today was success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

SpiritSong
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Post by SpiritSong » Thu Oct 19, 2017 8:52 pm

I think resisting fresh baked cookies called for an extra slice of veggie pizza! :D

Crystal
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Post by Crystal » Fri Oct 20, 2017 12:27 am

Resisting eating a freshly baked homemade cookie (or 5) when i’m the one baking them is just way beyond my ability. That’s amazing! Way to go!
44 years old. Long time vegetarian.
Vanilla No S.
Starting Weight: 269 (17 July 2017)
Last year: 228 (14 August 2018)
Current Weight: 232 (6 November 2019)
Goal Weight: Wherever my weight eventually settles on No S.

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Oct 20, 2017 5:36 am

Thanks SpiritSong and Crystal :)
By the way Crystal I love how you have your eventual goal as 'Wherever my weight eventually settles on No S.' Such a sensible approach, and exactly how things are working out for me. I wish you luck on your NoS journey.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Fri Oct 20, 2017 5:34 pm

28 lbs lost while maintaining a friendly relationship with food and with you body is a great achievement! Cheers!
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Oct 20, 2017 8:15 pm

Hi jenji, thanks for your kind comment. It may interest you to know that my stats are/were similar to yours, I am 42, 5 foot 6" and started out weighing 190 pounds last September. I am now 161 pounds, I just dropped another pound so 29lbs in total. Although it took me around 10 months to lose the majority of that weight, and although I am still officially overweight with a bmi of 26, I have never been more comfortable with my own body or more accepting of myself, imperfections and all. NoS has done so much for my self esteem, which was completely unexpected.
I wish you much success on your NoS journey.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Oct 20, 2017 8:23 pm

Today, success, just about by the skin of my teeth. End of a busy and stressful half term at the school where I work, also a stressful time with my husband's health, also I am brewing a head cold, also I just felt really really hungry before dinner. Managed to wait, ate a large plateful of curry, had a large glass of wine and felt much better! I had oolala's wise words in my head, she has never regretted staying green, but has always regretted going red, or something like that! (Apologies oolala for misquoting you but that was the general gist of it). I really am pleased I stayed strong.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Gracie
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Post by Gracie » Fri Oct 20, 2017 9:54 pm

Bluebell, this thread is beyond motivating. It's taken me a few days, but I've finally read everything (phew!).

I'm honestly so impressed with your willpower and determination! In spite of the hardships and obstacles that have been thrown your way, you've knocked off almost 30 pounds. That is no small feat, if I do say so myself! You have my deepest admiration. :)

Also, I'm sending positive thoughts and love to your family as you support your husband through this difficult time. Hope he's doing well today.

Keep up the awesome work!

xx
28 year old who believes that true growth comes from stepping outside of your comfort zone.
Fun-sized (4'10"), fun-loving, and on a journey to embrace a healthy and practical approach to food.
SW (10/9): 118#
CW (11/6): 113#
GW: 105#

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Sat Oct 21, 2017 6:36 am

Thank you so much Gracie I really appreciate your kind words, it is humbling to know that you've read through my whole thread and found it helpful. My main motivation over the months has been knowing that any other alternative will lead to failure and self loathing. I have found that the benefits of NoS have happened so gradually that I've almost not noticed it, a kind of drip drip effect that has culminated in a huge positive. Keep on keeping on is the main piece of advice I can give! I wish you success on your NoS journey. :)
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Mon Oct 23, 2017 1:58 am

Bluebell wrote:Hi jenji, thanks for your kind comment. It may interest you to know that my stats are/were similar to yours, I am 42, 5 foot 6" and started out weighing 190 pounds last September. I am now 161 pounds, I just dropped another pound so 29lbs in total. Although it took me around 10 months to lose the majority of that weight, and although I am still officially overweight with a bmi of 26, I have never been more comfortable with my own body or more accepting of myself, imperfections and all. NoS has done so much for my self esteem, which was completely unexpected.
I wish you much success on your NoS journey.
That is very motivating to me, thank you!
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Oct 23, 2017 6:54 am

Dont Know if it was just me, but I couldn't connect to this website over the weekend, which left me feeling surprisingly bereft!
Anyway, I stuck to 3 meals with some treats over the weekend. It is half term here in the Uk so I will be at home with my boys for the week. Thursday I have planned as a special day, I will be celebrating my birthday early as my husband will be away for the actual day (29th). Apart from that I aim to stay on plan.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

SpiritSong
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Post by SpiritSong » Mon Oct 23, 2017 9:03 am

No, wasn't just you. So glad to have the site back! :D

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Oct 23, 2017 9:28 pm

Ah OK thanks SpiritSong, yes me too! I didn't realise how much I rely on jotting down my thoughts here, until I couldn't!
Today, success. Had a lovely day at a pottery course today, very very rare for me to spend a whole day away from the family doing something just for me. Lunch was provided and was a large plate of ploughmans, bread cheese ham salad etc. I left some of the bread as there was so much. Cake was provided but I declined! I baked brownies as well when I got home and managed to resist the offcuts. Am saving some for Thursday when I am planning a special day.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Larkspur
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Post by Larkspur » Mon Oct 23, 2017 10:37 pm

Oh, good job with the offcuts (perfect term for those crunchy bits on the end that somehow seem harmless until after you've eaten them.)

SpiritSong
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Post by SpiritSong » Tue Oct 24, 2017 4:40 pm

Larkspur wrote:Oh, good job with the offcuts (perfect term for those crunchy bits on the end that somehow seem harmless until after you've eaten them.)
Those have calories?!?!?!? :shock:

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Oct 24, 2017 7:51 pm

lol SpiritSong :lol: If only I could convince myself they were calorie free!
Had a lovely time with friends today, we went to a coffee shop and I managed to just have a coffee, everyone else had cake, but I didn't feel deprived because I felt like the cappuccino was a treat in itself.
I am still fighting off a head cold. I wish it would just go now.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Oct 26, 2017 9:57 pm

Yesterday- success
Today, a planned S day. My husband and boys wanted to do an early birthday celebration as my husband will be away for my actual birthday. Enjoyed a nice lunch with the in laws, my treat at lunch was a cupcake which I enjoyed. As it so happened I was also out at a friends for dinner, and I took my homemade brownies for dessert. In all honesty I found it very rich and very sweet, and am sitting in bed feeling bloated. It amazes me how much my body has got used to NoS, I can't really cope with eating late in the evening anymore, and certainly not with eating a rich sugary dessert. I enjoyed it at the time but am not enjoying the after effects!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Oct 27, 2017 10:08 pm

Today - success. A beautiful Autumn day, we had a picnic lunch in our camper van and a lovely walk through the woods. So lucky to spend time with the family, just the four of us doing our thing, my husband is away with work for a couple of weeks from tomorrow, so I need to look back and remember the happy times. Picnic lunch was fine, one plate and resisted the cakes, dinner was takeaway curry, delicious and stuck to one plate.
I have been given a box of hand crafted chocolates selected individually, I am going to try and have one or two at the weekends and make them last! I need to hide them from my boys!!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

gingerpie
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Post by gingerpie » Sat Oct 28, 2017 11:46 pm

I have been given a box of hand crafted chocolates selected individually, I am going to try and have one or two at the weekends and make them last! I need to hide them from my boys!!
This reminds me of when I was young. My mother would hide Christmas cookies in the freezer but each of us 5 children would sneak "a few". By the time she would take them out for the holidays there would be nothing left but crumbs and each of us would claim innocence. 😉 Good luck in your endeavours!

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Sun Oct 29, 2017 10:25 pm

Great story gingerpie! I have eaten a few of the chocolates and managed to keep them to myself!
Far too many Ss this weekend, my birthday celebrations have been lovely but I've had too many opportunities to eat drink and be merry! I am not going anywhere near the scales for a few days, I feel bloated and I know I have gained a pound or two (or three :shock: ) Back to reality tomorrow, which as always will come as a relief.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Oct 31, 2017 10:18 pm

Yesterday and today, success, a late dinner today, I ate around 8.30pm which is late for me but unavoidable due to youngest son's activities. I was Ok, hungry but able to hang on, and had planned ahead and defrosted a meal in advance.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Nov 01, 2017 10:18 pm

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Larkspur
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Post by Larkspur » Wed Nov 01, 2017 11:59 pm

Happy late birthday!

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Nov 02, 2017 9:51 pm

Thank you Larkspur!
Today - success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Nov 03, 2017 9:21 pm

Success. A little devil sitting on my shoulder this evening tempting me to rebel. There's chocolates in the cupboard, just a few wouldn't make a difference. You're hungry, have some crisps before dinner. What the hell, its Friday evening, you deserve a treat.
Somewhat troubling that I still have this voice from time to time. But really, I knew I wouldn't give in, I've come so far and its not worth the regret for the short moment of satisfaction.
Tomorrow I will have a few chocolates though, and not feel guilty! That's the beauty of NoS.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

SpiritSong
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Post by SpiritSong » Sat Nov 04, 2017 12:16 pm

Yay, every success against that little devil makes you stronger! :D

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Sun Nov 05, 2017 7:54 pm

Well I wasn't strong this weekend! Too many sweets. I need to be strict with my no snacking rule at weekends. I can't cope with free reign. Next weekend I will try and get this back on track.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

ironchef
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Post by ironchef » Sun Nov 05, 2017 10:37 pm

Bluebell wrote:Somewhat troubling that I still have this voice from time to time.
I’d say it’s very normal to have that little voice. Five years later I still hear it at times (go on, you deserve some, you’ve had a tough day). What is different is that I feel very confident that the little devil is full of crap, and experience tells me I can easily tell her to shut up 🤠and I will not regret it.

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Nov 06, 2017 10:23 pm

Ironchef thank you for the reassurance that it is normal. I am still learning that the little devil is full of crap! Actually, I think I do know it, but am still not always ready to believe it fully if that makes sense!
Today, success, out for lunch with my parents and auntie. They know about NoS but still seem surprised when I say no thank you to a starter, dessert, side dishes etc.
I have been thinking about my dad's issues around food, he's a strange one alright! Often complains that there's not enough on his plate, he's being given 'rations', or will find something else not quite right. Today he was complaning that the chips were supposed to be 'hand cut'. I pointed out he had a huge pile of them and they looked pretty delicious. He seems to need something to be unhappy with otherwise he's not happy! Ah well. Parents. I love them to bits but they sure did cause me a lot of issues around food. NoS has helped me unpick so much of it though.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Nov 08, 2017 6:42 pm

Struggling a bit these last couple of days. I am wanting to rebel in small ways. Picking a few extras when I've almost finished my plate. Craving sweets. I think it may be partly a reaction to the fact that I have reached a weight I am happy with, and have been able to maintain that weight for a couple of months - my old pattern is to go back to all of the bad old habits. Then of course all the weight goes back on and more. I am not going to let this happen, I know it would be madness, and I keep reminding myself that the alternatives to NoS are all miserable. The dieting is miserable, the bingeing is miserable, the constant searching for the next miracle cure is miserable.
So I am hanging on in there through this rough patch, trying to be kind to myself, and focussing on the positives.
Not helping my mindset is the fact that my husband is working away, we have done 14 days and have 4 left. I get very grumpy around this stage when his trips are this long!
Ah well. Rant over. Back to life!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Wed Nov 08, 2017 7:42 pm

Hang in there! The habits are your friends in keeping steady.
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Nov 08, 2017 10:23 pm

Thank you jenji. I am definitely hanging on to the habits, you are so right in saying that they will keep me steady. After more than a year they are fairly well entrenched, but the old urges are still there under the surface. I guess a lifetime of a poor relationship with food isn't going to just disappear.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

ironchef
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Post by ironchef » Wed Nov 08, 2017 11:35 pm

When my husband is working and I’m dealing with house and kids on my own I often feel shakier around food. Like I somehow want to “treat myselfâ€. I try to do stuff other than food if I can. 14 days is a lovely ng trip!

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Nov 09, 2017 10:22 pm

Hi ironchef, yes I think it is partly that, also I just tend to get fed up with life when he's been away for a while, and I don't have food to cheer myself up with. Which is crazy because I know that it doesn't actually cheer me up in the long run. Old habits die hard I guess.
Anyway today I pretty much fought the demons, a huge plate of comfort food for dinner but managed to stick to NoS.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Nov 10, 2017 10:37 pm

Today - Fail.
Dinner turned into a binge :(
Have been fighting it for days now but this evening I allowed myself to give in. I think I probably need to just mark it and move on, not sure much good will come from over analysing and beating myself up.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Sun Nov 12, 2017 10:11 pm

Struggling. I'm not giving up, but I feel some of my old destructive thought processes trying to return. Have not been in control at all really this weekend. Fresh start tomorrow. My husband is home at least. Just feel quite down about it all.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

ironchef
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Post by ironchef » Sun Nov 12, 2017 10:52 pm

Don’t give up. In times of tiredness and stress our brains love to throw us some old patterns from deep in our habit brain at us. There’s nothing wrong with your willpower or your plan, it’s just that your old habits aren’t smart and they aren’t good at problem solving. They just say “oh, trouble? Ok, what about comfort like this? Like we used to do, huh?â€

Glad your husband is home, tomorrow is a new day!

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lpearlmom
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Post by lpearlmom » Mon Nov 13, 2017 4:58 am

Sorry Blue! I've had sooo many over the top weekends but still managed to lose weight. I know it never feels good though but can't fail on S days. Tomorrow just set that reset button and start fresh.
:twisted: SW: 210 lbs
CW: 172
GW:160

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Nov 13, 2017 10:05 pm

Thank you for the support and kind words ironchef and ipearlmom, I really do appreciate it. Ironchef that makes so much sense, and has helped me stop being so hard on myself - thank you.
I am feeling better today, back in control again, which feels so much better. I have somehow maintained my weight so that helps too. I am hoping this particular storm in a teacup is over!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Nov 14, 2017 10:27 pm

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

ironchef
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Post by ironchef » Wed Nov 15, 2017 11:25 am

Well done!

Larkspur
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Post by Larkspur » Wed Nov 15, 2017 3:45 pm

You're doing so great, Bluebell. Seconding Ironchef's wisdom on the habits.

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Nov 15, 2017 10:16 pm

Aw thanks guys, that means a lot! :)
Today - success, with filled plates!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Nov 17, 2017 10:00 pm

Yesterday and today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:27 pm

Yesterday - success
Today - small fail. Handful of peanuts before dinner. Not sure why I did that. Mark it and move on.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Nov 24, 2017 10:44 pm

Weds, Thurs, Fri, success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Nov 27, 2017 10:16 pm

Weekend - lots of sweets. Too many really, mindless eating.
Today - success
Tomorrow will be a planned S day, as I am going out to dinner with friends. Our boys are away on a 4 night residential which we are all struggling with, they’re only 8 and its the first time away for them. So we are going out to take our minds off it a bit! (Or drown our sorrows!) I haven’t had a planned weekday S day for quite some time so I will enjoy this one.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Nov 28, 2017 10:03 pm

Delicious meal out with my friends. Very full of good food and drink, but I really enjoyed it and their company.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

gingerpie
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Post by gingerpie » Tue Nov 28, 2017 11:13 pm

Just the way it should be!!😃

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Nov 30, 2017 4:38 pm

Last night was a fail at dinner time. I ate out again with my eldest son, youngest son and husband both away so we treated ourselves. Unfortunately I allowed myself to eat what I wanted and it was definitely more than one plate. No dessert is the only positive. I miss my youngest so much, he’s never been away this long, and I guess I just comforted myself with food, and the good company of my other son.
Back on it today despite fairly strong what the heck urges.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

oolala53
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Post by oolala53 » Fri Dec 01, 2017 6:35 am

Hi, Bluebell. Checking in. Saw your post about how you felt like you overate because you're missing your son. The books I've been reading lately say there are SO many reasons we overeat. Eating in a restaurant alone is about five of them! And comfort, such as it is, is one of them, though that one is usually very short-lived.

Have a great December!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Dec 01, 2017 10:38 pm

Thank you Oolala. Youngest son returned today, so so lovely to see him. He had an amazing time, I am very proud of him coping with being away from home all week at 8 years old. Today - success. But I am 2 pounds up from my restaurant over eating! Scary how quickly it goes on.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

oolala53
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Post by oolala53 » Sat Dec 02, 2017 5:42 am

8 yrs! Prolly mostly water retention from restaurant food.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Dec 04, 2017 10:28 pm

Didn’t weigh this morning following too many Ss this weekend. Worried I am losing it a bit as we approach Christmas and so I am re focussing my efforts and reminding myself of all I have learnt this year. To keep going is probably how I would best sum it up! To keep the faith in NoS and how much it has helped me. I have almost completed my year’s commitment to NoS and while it has most certainly not been a perfect year by any means, it has brought me stability and a moderate approach to eating which is always there to fall back on no matter how much I feel I have messed up. That is what makes NoS a way of eating I can follow for life.
Today - success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Dec 06, 2017 10:25 pm

Yesterday and today- success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by Bluebell » Fri Dec 08, 2017 8:09 pm

I have been reflecting some more as we approach Christmas. To add to my post on Monday, it struck me today (in the staff room mid morning as I gazed at the biscuit tin) I have never actually been tempted to give up completely on NoS. Not once. I have had temptations, I have stayed strong at times and given in at other times, but not once have I though ‘I’m giving up now’. That is what makes NoS so very different from any other diet. Somehow underneath all the ups and downs, there is a strong and consistent foundation that keeps me from straying.
I am maintaining my weight and have done for a few months now. I think I can honestly state that the yoyo dieting has gone forever. That is the main achievement of 2017 for me. Yay! :D
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by jenji » Sun Dec 10, 2017 1:01 am

That is wonderful. I've only been doing No S since the fall, but so far I feel the same way. It's provides a structure that works for me and my life. :)
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

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Post by oolala53 » Sun Dec 10, 2017 4:05 am

Bluebell, I've always felt the same way, though I occasionally entertained being stricter about what I had on my plate or even-shudder-calorie restriction and monitoring. But I never considered snacking. Even recently, when I gave myself a bit of a break, I never thought of myself as letting it go, and certainly not forever. It was kind of like of something I've heard of where married people go through a phase of doldrums or difficulty with their mates, but they aren't considering divorce and they certainly don't cheat on them. They just withdraw for a bit or aren't as cooperative and loving for awhile. And I've also heard when they come out of it, they have a kind of second honeymoon!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Dec 11, 2017 5:21 pm

Jenji, good for you, and I hope your NoS journey is a long and happy one!
Oolala, excellent summary, I like the marriage analogy, it makes a lot of sense.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Merry
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Post by Merry » Wed Dec 13, 2017 6:54 am

Bluebell wrote:I have been reflecting some more as we approach Christmas. To add to my post on Monday, it struck me today (in the staff room mid morning as I gazed at the biscuit tin) I have never actually been tempted to give up completely on NoS. Not once. I have had temptations, I have stayed strong at times and given in at other times, but not once have I though ‘I’m giving up now’. That is what makes NoS so very different from any other diet. Somehow underneath all the ups and downs, there is a strong and consistent foundation that keeps me from straying.
I am maintaining my weight and have done for a few months now. I think I can honestly state that the yoyo dieting has gone forever. That is the main achievement of 2017 for me. Yay! :D
This is awesome, great achievement!

This is how I feel about No-S now too. I didn't my first time around--but I never really was able to get myself established on and committed to the habits. I think I had to really decide that "diets" don't work to be able to stick with No-S.
Homeschool Mom and No S returnee as of 11-30-15.
2 years and counting on No-S.
29 lbs. down, 34 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
Respect Moderation

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Tue Dec 19, 2017 7:17 pm

Oops I haven’t checked in for a few days, life has been extremely busy but NoS has been a constant throughout all the hustle and bustle of the last week of term. Cannot wait to break up for Christmas on Thurs, I really feel that this Christmas will be so much better in terms of my eating. I am looking forward to enjoying fewtive treats without getting out of control. Let’s hope so anyway!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by Bluebell » Fri Dec 22, 2017 7:33 am

Yesterday I had an S day as it was our staff Christmas party. I did overeat, went back for seconds and had dessert. Seems I still occasionally get the impulse to eat for the sake of eating. Felt uncomfortably full going to bed. A normal NoS day for me today and hopefully a moderate weekend before Christmas starts!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Fri Dec 22, 2017 8:50 pm

I am procrastinating doing unpleasant tasks so I'm checking team 2017. Congrats on still being here! We actually have a lot of members still in there. Much better than "diets."
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

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Post by Bluebell » Fri Dec 22, 2017 10:59 pm

Hi Oolala I’m still here :D I have only just started telling colleagues about NoS, over a year after I started. They are all talking about which diet they’ll go on after the Christmas excesses! So glad I’m not playing that awful game anymore. Quite hard to convince them that NoS really works even though they have all made positive comments about my weight loss. Ah well, you can lead a horse to water...
Today, success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Sat Dec 23, 2017 1:42 am

I didn't say anything for a long time, either, and not until people noticed and asked. No takers. Voice crying in the wilderness. There was a time when I didn't believe it, either, though when I got exposed to meal structure, there was no off days. I thought they were nuts. That was at OA. So interesting that after all these years, the Anonymous movements have not noticed that nearly all recoverers relapse multiple times. Why not build it in with some handlholding to guide the person through?

I guess everyone who finds their way wants to proselytize about it at some point.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Dec 27, 2017 7:30 am

So I have had a lovely Christmas, lots of food and drink. I am checking in for accountability as I really want to have three green days now, and not just fall into holiday eating. My husband and sons are all at home which is lovely, however that does not mean I need to eat mindlessly! Lots of chocolates etc around the house, so I need to focus. Coming back here later to update!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by gingerpie » Wed Dec 27, 2017 12:00 pm

Hi Bluebell, is it possible to put the chocolate out of sight? It might help. - best of luck to you today.

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Post by oolala53 » Wed Dec 27, 2017 1:51 pm

Yes, you can definitely enjoy your husband and son without eating. There’s always sipping some coffee or tea with them, if needed.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Dec 27, 2017 10:43 pm

Thank you gingerpie and oolala for encouragement. Actually today wasn’t so bad, chocolates etc still very much in sight but I almost felt relieved that I didn’t have to eat them! Which is crazy really, I certainly don’t have to eat them on any day, S or NoS! Just the connection that Christmas = stuffing my face with everything in sight.
I have said it many times but I am so grateful to have the framework of NoS to pull me back into moderation.
We had a lovely long walk in the woods today, we had a little bit of snow here in Hampshire and it was very pretty.
Also as it is still the holidays I am able to relax a bit and have been teaching myself to crochet. Thoroughly enjoying learning a new creative skill, plus it keeps my hands busy and away from food :D
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by Bluebell » Fri Dec 29, 2017 9:52 pm

Yesterday and today- success. Had a few wobbly moments but managed to stay strong. Just reminded myself of how possible and easy it is to get between meals, and to get to the weekend. I’ve done it many times over the past 14 months and so I can do it now, its no different to any other time.
I have possibly eaten more calorific/heavier meals than I normally would, for example today I was out shopping with my 8yr old son and it was lunch time so we had lunch out in a pasty shop. Pasty and potato wedges - not my usual lunch! But lovely to enjoy it with him.
I know that once we are all back at work/school I’ll fall back into the usual routines and meals.
Looking forward to enjoying some Christmas treats this weekend!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Fri Dec 29, 2017 10:24 pm

I don' t know if I'm repeating myself ad nauseum, but I recently came off a few months of temporarily actually giving up on NOT WTH-ing in the afternoons, and eating bigger meals was one of my strategies for getting back on track. I'll never know if I could have skipped that step, but I'm having a easier time eating the more normal meals as they were before hanging off the wagon. I don't call it a fall, since it was on purpose.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

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Post by Bluebell » Mon Jan 01, 2018 1:42 pm

Well I have woken up to 2018 with a streaming cold. So not much appetite. I have definitely put on a couple of pounds over Christmas. Will focus on getting better but don’t need to take a sick day as such, don’t fancy many snacks or sweets anyway today. Every cloud....
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:14 pm

Chicken soup fits right in with No S. Take care!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

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Post by Merry » Wed Jan 03, 2018 1:24 am

Hope you feel better soon!
Homeschool Mom and No S returnee as of 11-30-15.
2 years and counting on No-S.
29 lbs. down, 34 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
Respect Moderation

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:47 pm

Thanks guys. Am on the mend now, didn’t eat much yesterday and today was a proper NoS day. Back to work tomorrow, as much as I’m dreading going back I think the routine will be good for my eating!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Wed Jan 03, 2018 11:37 pm

I don't like my job (have a semester's leave now!) but it was very supportive on No S for years. I'm not sure how I would have done without it. I brought my lunch and kept a panini grill there because I love hot food but not microwaves, except for boiling water or heating coffee.

I think I'll do okay at home, though I'll probably binge on the internet, as I am doing today.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Jan 04, 2018 9:45 pm

I love the idea that you had a panini grill at work Oolala! Sure sounds more appetising than the cold sandwich I usually end up taking. I hope you enjoy your semester’s leave, sounds wonderful.
I was fine at work today, as always the thought of it was worse than the reality, and I have stuck to NoS with no problems. It does help that I have started back with a 2 day week! (Wish that was always the case!)
It is DHs birthday on Saturday, going to make a fish pie and we’ll have both sets of grandparents round for dinner, really looking forward to a nice cosy evening in with the family.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Fri Jan 05, 2018 1:09 am

Forgot to say I was also lucky that my school had lunch at 12:30 p.m., not an hour earlier as most schools do. I guess I would have gotten used to it, but I hate eating lunch that early. I'm not always hungry then, or only mildly, and I'd rather look forward lunch and then a short afternoon of classes. !
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Fri Jan 05, 2018 9:36 pm

Oh gosh I would hate to eat lunch at 11.30! Mostly because the gap between lunch and dinner would be too long. I generally eat around 12.30 ish and ideally like dinner at 6pm.
Today - success. Two work days done, weekend here I come :)
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by Bluebell » Sun Jan 07, 2018 10:15 pm

A lovely weekend but I have eaten waaaay too much. I finally feel like the festive season is now properly over, my husband’s birthday seems to mark this in my mind!
So, New Year’s Resolution, to return to no snacks at all even at the weekends. I am unable to cope with complete freedom on S days and end up eating for the sake of it. I have done it successfully before and was making progress but have allowed myself to slip back into bad habits.
So as of next weekend, no snacks, ever! Yikes that sounds harsh. But completely do-able.
Not weighing tomorrow, I know it won’t be good for my state of mind.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

oolala53
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Post by oolala53 » Wed Jan 10, 2018 12:05 am

Gillian Riley says it is SO important to make choices not to eat from our own experience. Not that we "can't"eat but that we really know, I mean REALLY know it is in our best interest not to eat, either right then, or in certain situations When we do that, there is much less a sense of deprivation and more of getting a fair deal in the trade off. And it may also be that in that moment, we may WANT to eat. The desire may very well not go away in every instance. But the cost will be the same, so we pass.

It sounds like you are very ready to learn to make no snacks the default for you. :D
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Jan 10, 2018 10:01 pm

Well Oolala, for all of your wise words and positive comments (much appreciated of course) I have completely messed up today. Got home from work and ate and ate. :cry: Seems I still don’t really KNOW when its in my best interest not to eat. Sigh. This is my 16th month of NoS and still I have these moments of madness.
Emotional eating was my downfall today. Tired, under the weather with a sinus infection, pre menstrual, and I let myself tip over.
Didn’t make me feel better, only in the very short term.
WHEN will I learn??! Frustrated.
Onwards tomorrow.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

automatedeating
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Post by automatedeating » Thu Jan 11, 2018 2:59 am

Don't beat yourself up. Just one day. There are lots of future days. :)
Mark it and Move On.
It is what it is.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6
4/21 - 25.2

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Post by oolala53 » Thu Jan 11, 2018 6:43 am

Ditto not chastising yourself It reinforces the habit! You have done what nearly all maintainers have done in their first two years of adjusting to the new lifestyle. Lordy, I had plenty of those days. It’s just an old pattern. The more you can magnify the regret (NOT shame or guilt), the more chance you have to build up to being willing to see that you’re just never happy when this happens and you realize you can’t wait for the urges/pattern to go away. You will make the tough choice WHEN IT’S HARD. think you know this now, but it probably hasn’t really become clear. It’s not a crime. A few times each day, remember that you don’t want to regret anything tonight when your head hits the pillow. It may take more repetitions than you think it should or you want it to. Or not. (Do you have any idea how many years it took me not to go check out the bargain baked goods at two stores, sometimes on the same day? Not that long ago. )

Kindness AFTER a slip is a good idea; intense desire NOT to regret later BEFORE a slip is better than the other way around. Paradox!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Jan 11, 2018 3:49 pm

Thank you Oolala and Automatedeating. That helps so much. In the heat of the moment it felt as if I had lost all reasoning! But I will try and reflect as you suggest, when I am feeling calm. Today feels much better, I have so many ‘good’ days under my belt that I just get cross and frustrated with myself when I mess up like that. But I will take on board that is not a helpful way to think.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Thu Jan 11, 2018 4:28 pm

I try to look at myself like a science project when I fail. Hm... what happened here? Interesting. What are my observations about the conditions in which this happens? Write that down.

This hasn't made me slip-proof, but it has allowed me to learn and make small adjustments that really help me.
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:20 pm

Since I last posted I have had three days of out of control eating. I am worried that my yoyo dieting mindset is trying to kick in. Lose weight, maintain for a while, return to old habits, gain weight. I need NoS to be the end of that cycle, I truly believed and still believe it can be. Now is when I need to stay strong, otherwise I think those bad bad old habits have a chance of returning.
Today I have started afresh and had a good day.
One thing I have been pondering. Sometimes in the 10 minutes or so before a meal, I get a little agitated and anxious to start eating. I have tried a couple of times just allowing myself a few very low cal items like carrot sticks or olives. It does help relieve the tension, but obviously is not Vanilla NoS to the letter. I think I will continue to allow myself this unless it seems to become a problem and triggers more general snacking.
Gosh that was long.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by ZippaDee » Tue Jan 16, 2018 1:47 am

We are all pulling for you! I think it is so good that you have your eyes wide open and are aware of the potential backsliding and are going to nip it in the bud!! Congrats on your good day today!!
"Rivers know this: There is no hurry. We shall get there some day." ~Winnie the Pooh ~

A Flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms!

Diets Don't Work.

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Post by Bluebell » Tue Jan 16, 2018 10:02 pm

Thanks ZippaDee I appreciate your support.
Another good day, I feel back to ‘normal’ whatever that is!
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by oolala53 » Wed Jan 17, 2018 3:17 am

THAT was long? That would be me just getting going.

Bluebell, it might be asking a lot for your old habits NOT to take a run at these new ones. The brain feels threatened and will engage its strategies. Only your decision to stick with it can build the neural network to override the habit track.(Gillian Riley reported on a study that showed that people directed to do a task did not show any activity in the prefrontal cortex, but those who were given an option and chose one did show that activity. It doesn't mean it can't become more automatic.

Not to make a big "thinking" deal out of this, but it might be helpful some times to remind yourself: I'm not doing this because Reinhard says to. I'm doing it because I believe in it and really want to find a way to control my overeating in a consistent way. I could keep eating the old way, but I don't want to.) I.e. not I CAN'T. If I don't do this, I'll be depriving myself of feeling much better with food and about food."

Yes, I'm putting words in your mouth but I thought you might prefer it to an offer of you-know-what.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Jan 17, 2018 7:41 am

The thing is, the rational part of my brain does know this. I really do 100% believe in NoS, I have said in my testimonial and posted on here about how much of a difference NoS has made to my life. I know that the old habits are no good for me. BUT... in the heat of the moment, when I am feeling tired, hormonal, poorly, whatever, it seems as if I have an override button. All those logical thoughts are gone. I just want to EAT!!
Those episodes are definitely becoming less, but I have not yet learned how to stop myself every single time.
It is coming. But it is taking time.
Thanks you Oolala for your unwavering support.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Wed Jan 17, 2018 11:55 am

Hang in there. I wonder if when you are feeling upset, there is so other soothing or healing ritual that might help? Maybe make a list of them to try in those moments?
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Jan 17, 2018 10:08 pm

Thanks jenji. I have recently taught myself crochet and am working on a blanket, I find it really calming and enjoyable. Definitely helps in the evenings to keep my hands and mind occupied!
Today - success. A late ish dinner because of my son’s activity but it felt Ok waiting to eat.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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Post by Bluebell » Thu Jan 18, 2018 10:24 pm

Today - success. Dinner was not the best, a KFC with my eldest son, I stuck to one plate but was aware how quickly I was eating it, something about takeaway food does that to me. It is not a regular thing though so I feel OK about it.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Post by jenji » Fri Jan 19, 2018 1:56 pm

Bluebell wrote:Thanks jenji. I have recently taught myself crochet and am working on a blanket, I find it really calming and enjoyable. Definitely helps in the evenings to keep my hands and mind occupied!
Today - success. A late ish dinner because of my son’s activity but it felt Ok waiting to eat.
Cool! That’s a hobby I’d like to try someday.
I'm a 53-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight: 181#, BMI 27.9, 12/19/2022

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Post by Bluebell » Sun Jan 21, 2018 5:05 pm

Friday was a fail. I ate inbetween lunch and dinner. This weekend has been OK, I am still working on no snacking on S days, I had nothing between breakfast and lunch but again I have eaten a snack this afternoon. I really need to dig deep and get back into the good habits I have worked so hard to establish. I know I can do this. I have no idea why I am mentally rebelling so much at the moment. But no way am I giving in.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jan 22, 2018 8:07 pm

OK so today was good. Back in the swing of it (again). Faced the scales and am 4lb heavier than pre Christmas. I need to:
Log here each day and be honest
Eat filling healthy meals
Remind myself of the alternatives to NoS
Focus on one day at a time
Trust in this way of eating. It has served me well for almost 16 months and nothing else will work for me.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

oolala53
Posts: 10059
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:46 am
Location: San Diego, CA USA

Post by oolala53 » Mon Jan 22, 2018 9:26 pm

Takeaway food alters just about everybody's behavior. It taps into primal desires that are all about the wanting, not the satisfaction. It doesn't mean you have to chuck it altogether. Just knowing what you're dealing with can help. At some point, it may be a good time to add in the habit of savoring all meals. It can take time but eventually, it can carry over to the situations you have done your fastest eating in. It's a different kind of pleasure.


But you're doing well just to stick to your plates, fast or slow!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Post by Bluebell » Thu Jan 25, 2018 9:43 pm

Oops haven’t checked in since Monday! Havd had 3 successful days. Feeling better and back in control again. I do need to work on reaching for food when I am tired/upset/hormonal etc. Still a work in progress...
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

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