Coping/ distraction strategies for anxiety

No Snacks, no sweets, no seconds. Except on Days that start with S. Too simple for you? Simple is why it works. Look here for questions, introductions, support, success stories.

Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating

Post Reply
babybird
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2016 6:03 pm
Location: U.K

Coping/ distraction strategies for anxiety

Post by babybird » Thu Dec 29, 2016 2:47 am

Does anyone have tried/ tested strategies they use when they've been unable to cope with any negative emotion. I've used eating for as long as I can remember (13) as it makes me feel better for a short time. However 10 times worse after.

i can't leave the house to walk it off as I have a baby and the weather doesn't always permit.

One example is yesterday I knew I wanted to overeat and break the N day rules as I was stressed. I tried for about an hour to resist sweets but finally gave in as the urge seemed too intense and it seemed inevitable I would.

Even my partner said not to eat them as he knew it was because a family member had upset me. After he left for work I dived straight in and binged.

This is a recurring theme for me and is the main thing stopping me from getting green days.

Please help!! [/list]
Recovering from a 26 year binge eating disorder

User avatar
Merry
Posts: 1658
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2008 2:14 am

Post by Merry » Thu Dec 29, 2016 3:09 am

I think you have the right idea with a walk (exercise + sunshine on the face). Maybe you could find an exercise video you like (Leslie Sansone has "walking" exercise dvd's that I often use in the winter). One thing I like about her stuff is that you are often moving the opposite arm/leg, which helps to strengthen that right/left brain communication. I think getting out the adrenaline and just getting tired physically can make mental and emotional problems seem not as overwhelming, even if I still don't know what to do.

I also find cell salts can take the edge off, or if I'm really feeling all out of sorts, I'll take a homeopathic remedy.
Homeschool Mom and No S returnee as of 11-30-15.
2 years and counting on No-S.
29 lbs. down, 34 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
Respect Moderation

MaggieMae
Posts: 589
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2015 9:53 pm
Location: Ohio, USA

Post by MaggieMae » Thu Dec 29, 2016 4:12 am

I have always had anxiety issues, but they were really brought to light after having my son. What I do when I'm really anxious and stressed is take a piece of paper and I list every single thing that is weighing on my mind. Every thing. And then I throw it into a fire. Since I don't have a real fireplace , I carefully light the paper on fire and drop it into a large glass candle holder. After a minute I put the flame out. It symbolizes to me that I'm letting go of the worry. I still have that desire to eat ,too. Today I chewed several pieces of gum to get that chomping satisfaction.

oolala53
Posts: 10059
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:46 am
Location: San Diego, CA USA

Post by oolala53 » Thu Dec 29, 2016 6:29 am

This may be way too much, as I'm not known for brevity, but I'm going ahead. I have dealt with anxiety for years. I am not fantastic at it but I rarely eat over it anymore. I gently say you must become willing to test out whether those feelings/sensations are "too" intense. Too intense for what? What do you think will happen if you don't do anything to cover them? Do you think they will keep getting so strong that you will explode? Or get sick? Or die? Are they as terrible as a bad headache or a toothache? Or being in labor? Do you end up yelling or hitting anyone? Yes, it would surely be better if you didn't have the sensations, but now that they're here, the best thing to do is ride their wave through the steps I'll describe.

Can you also see if there are thoughts such as, "This shouldn't be happening. This is terrible/awful/insufferable. I can't stand this." These are PART of the brain pattern and serve to intensify the feelings to get you to do the behavior, in this case, eat. But they don't come from any real need for food. The hunger pathway has been hijacked by that anxiety pattern.

The idea that the feelings are insufferably intense is an illusion produced by an errant brain pattern. They are similar to what a person with OCD feels when she wants to wash her hands again or go check the locks or whatever. It feels as if something terrible is going to happen if she doesn't go do the behavior, but it isn't true. It's not like real hunger or thirst or a sign of real damage to the body. The sensations will reach a peak and eventually subside, though it may take awhile and many times to practice.

I used the protocol used by OCDers many times in my first year of No S.
1. Acknowledge that the seeming terrible, irritating feelings and accompanying thoughts are a kind of obsession that you must have something to eat but that they don't actually signal a need for food.
2. Attribute the supposed need to get rid of the feelings with food as an errant brain pattern, an unfortunate mistake that has just gotten stronger and stronger.
3. Divert. This one is tricky because it's personal and when you're caring for a child, it may be hard to do. You've got to try to find something pleasurable or productive to do for at least a few minutes. It takes the most effort, but it's crucial AND worth it! Maybe focus for a few minutes on looking at something pretty in the room, really noticing the colors or the light at that moment. Or have a few songs you like to hum or sing the words to. Or look really closely at your child, at eyes or nose or ears and marvel at it for a minute or so. Or set a timer for several minutes and clean one corner of a room or the fridge. If you are feeling especially freaked, put some ice and water in a baggie and hold it over your eyes and cheeks for a few minutes. This has been shown to help decrease frantic thinking and stimulate more rational thinking.

You may be able to get caught up in one other thing for long enough to have the feelings decrease enough that it doesn't seem like an emergency anymore or it may have to be a few things in a row. If you can't get drawn completely in, then while you're doing it, be saying to yourself, "THIS is how I change this pattern and get better at coping. This may seem hard but it's not as hard as continuing to feel trapped by the false need for food. I really want to change this brain pattern and this is how it's done. I don't have to wait for the feelings to go away on their own. In the mean time, I can tolerate this. The wave will peak and things will be okay."

I know this is all you asked for, but I think the other two steps make this one easier. Trying to plunge right into this often seems impossible. Getting more clear what's going on can help, though it won't feel breezy! And step 4 is also deemed essential.

4. After the cycle is over and you have a little distance, you might be able to put a lower value on how important it is to react by eating to those anxious feelings and possibly accompanying thoughts.

These steps come from work by Dr. Jeffery Schwartz and have been shown to actually change brain patterns in people with OCD, which is pretty impressive. Now, these people don't always become light-hearted characters, but they do often either eliminate or greatly reduce the offending behavior, and that's a pretty big deal!

And don't forget to remember how great your last meal was and to look forward to how wonderful at least one thing at your next meal is going to be, especially if you don't eat in the meantime.

Or if the writing and burning thing works, forget all this!
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

MaggieMae
Posts: 589
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2015 9:53 pm
Location: Ohio, USA

Post by MaggieMae » Thu Dec 29, 2016 11:19 am

Thanks for the information, oolala. I will definitely be reading this a few more times. And, there's no risk to catching your house on fire! :lol:

babybird
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2016 6:03 pm
Location: U.K

Post by babybird » Thu Dec 29, 2016 8:24 pm

Everyone here is so incredibly supportive and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking time out to respond. If it wasn't for your support and encouragement I don't think I would be feeling as positive about this plan as I do.

Oolala- wow. You really understand the psychology behind binge eating. That's exactly what happens to me when the urge to binge arises. No S helps me become aware of the ovwrwhelming/ uncomfortable feeling but I need to be more active in combating physically reasponding to it.

Some great ideas to let the urge pass. Writing the thoughts down and focusing on them is something I could try. Also to be productive and clean a cupboard/ bathroom is a further strategy I can use. By the time I complete the work I'm sure the feeling would have passed.
Recovering from a 26 year binge eating disorder

babybird
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2016 6:03 pm
Location: U.K

Post by babybird » Thu Dec 29, 2016 8:25 pm

Sorry for the typos My mobile is playing up.
Recovering from a 26 year binge eating disorder

Post Reply