From my Daily Check in--Support and advice needed!

No Snacks, no sweets, no seconds. Except on Days that start with S. Too simple for you? Simple is why it works. Look here for questions, introductions, support, success stories.

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zoolina
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From my Daily Check in--Support and advice needed!

Post by zoolina » Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:39 pm

Day 7? Day 1? Success?? Failure??
We got home from a walk and I was cold and tired and thought: "I'll make a cup of hot cocao-- that's a drink, and I'll only put about a teaspoon of sugar in, so that's not an S. But then I started drinking and I realized that I was kidding myself. A glass of milk may not be an S but a cup of chocolatey goodness certainly is. (Who was it that was talking about coacoa? Was that the English Chap?)

So even though I didn't mean to lose the plot, I have. Grrrr.

I'm finding it harder and harder to do No-S as time goes on. I've been loading my plate high--no seconds, but really I'm just pushing the envelope. This past two S days I woke up thinking: hurahh, now I can indulge. And I did. I guess this is the point in diets where it always breaks down too. I MUST PERSEVERE. Discipline, strength, will, desire and a heck of a lot less chocolatey goodness is in order.

wosnes
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Post by wosnes » Sun Nov 26, 2006 4:26 pm

I might be missing something, but today (Sunday) is an S day, so what's the problem with the chocolate?
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."

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British Chap
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Post by British Chap » Sun Nov 26, 2006 4:42 pm

Hi Zoolina, yes it was me asking about Cocoa (not Hot Chocolate which has loads of sugar in it.)

From your other comments it appears you've made sunday an N-Day for you .

If you read the thread there's some debate about this - but I think the main point is that YOU feel like it's breaking the rules, whether it's a 'technical' infirngement or not. It seems to me that the point of NoS is developing self discipline to control an emotional impulse.

If you feel like you're breaking your standards, then you're probably right.

Plus, several people commented on the 'foody' and 'chocolatey' nature of cocoa. I was honest with myself and accepted that I was looking for ways to push the envelope rather than be disciplined so I decided is was an SDay drink.

Don't beat yourself up though - be honest, of course, but focus on the committment and progress you're making - that way you'll get more of it.

Good luck to you,

Gareth

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Iregirl
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Post by Iregirl » Sun Nov 26, 2006 5:16 pm

Aw, Zoolina, don't feel too bad.

I agree with British Chap; if you feel like it's an S for you, then that's what matters and you obviously know enough to go from there. The fact that you had that mental conversation with yourself (in the non-craziest way possible, of course :wink: ) proves that you're not having much success trying to sabatoge yourself and are indeed invested in making No S work for you.

Coming here and posting about it instead of avoiding the boards is also a good sign that even though you're frustrated right now and feeling like this is getting harder for you, you're taking accountability. That's an important part of successfully changing habits.

zoolina
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Post by zoolina » Mon Nov 27, 2006 9:56 am

Thanks for the support, guys! In the long run, the cup of coacoa is not what bothers me. What does bother me is that, though I like this way of eating and can really see how reasonable it is for me, personally, I'm finding it harder and harder to do no-s every day. The beginning (a month ago) was so easy, now every day is a struggle of will. Have any of you long-timers out there experienced this kind of dip, and did it get better, in the end??

Z

ThomsonsPier
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Post by ThomsonsPier » Mon Nov 27, 2006 11:37 am

Any long term endeavour enjoys peaks and suffers troughs. I find I'm eating more and bending the rules more often now that the weather's getting colder, but the core is still there. Don't worry too much and focus ahead rather than behind.
ThomsonsPier

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pangelsue
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Post by pangelsue » Mon Nov 27, 2006 1:25 pm

Lots of good replies and I don't know how much I can add but I can speak from the standpoint of someone who has sabatoged herself on a lot of diet plans through the years and who is determined to make this one work despite many failed attempts.
Reinhard stated it very well recently on another thread. If the diet becomes just tooooo hard and we are having more and more trouble staying on it, the problem could be that we just don't want to do it anymore and we are looking for a way out. Why do people give up smoking and go back or give up drinking and go back, or drugs? They make it through the tough part and then the crash and go back? Why do people lose a ton of weight and then regain it all? I think it is because we are all prepared for the short haul. We start a difficult task, struggle through until it gets easier and then we think "there now, that's done". But it's not. It is at that point that the really difficult part starts. Maintenance. Maintenance means committment and no turning back. It means permanent loss of something we desire. It means closing the book on a former way of life, permanently. For me that decision is happening in fits and starts. I do very well until I realize that sticking with No S means always, always saying No to sugar, snacks and seconds Monday through Friday. Always and forever. It also means that if I am to be really successful, I can't have every treat or snack I missed all week long on S days. I thought for a long time that if I missed a snack during the week it was okay because I could have it on the weekend. I became frantic by Sunday night if there was a taste I missed during the week that I hadn't satisfied yet. How could I make it to the next Friday with that hanging over my head? Committment for me means finding a way to accept that my appetite will never be totally satisfied on any diet. I will always want more. When I finally accept that fact, like an alchoholic, drug addict, cigarette smoker etc. I can accept craving for what it is, a hazard to my health and all I hold dear and I can deal with the cravings one at a time. Let's not fool ourselves here. We all know the drill. If we can't do it, we're allowed to give up and go back to our old ways. Drunks do it all the time. So do drug addicts and smokers. So do over eaters. My name is Sue and I overeat. (everyone reply "hi, Sue"). Committment and maintenance. Not for the faint of heart.

By the way, today is another day 1 for me. I will eventually do this. I just need to commit to it.
A lot of growing up happens between "it fell" and "I dropped it."

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reinhard
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Post by reinhard » Mon Nov 27, 2006 2:05 pm

Zoolina,

I think it will get easier. Long term, it doesn't make sense for it to get harder. You'll build habit, and need less will. A month may feel like a while, but I'd be very surprised if you didn't notice it getting easier soon. My guess is your initial spurt of enthusiasm gave you a big willpower boost but it's now wearing off. If you can keep at it and stay strict just a little longer, I think you'll find habit is even more powerful than enthusiasm.

Reinhard

hexagon
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Post by hexagon » Fri Dec 01, 2006 4:25 am

Hi Zoolina,

As a person who is overly self-critical/perfectionistic, I can say from experience that you're being overly self-critical/perfectionistic. One cup of cocoa when you've been keeping on track for over a month? It really isn't a big transgression.

I don't really know what to say about the cravings since I'm not an expert, having fallen flat on my face for the last month due to my life changes. I guess I do have to agree with Reinhard though that planning treats seems to work better than just allowing the day to be a free-for-all.

I've found that with eating I've slowly had to figure out what works well and what doesn't via a trial and error method (oooh, and I'm still figuring things out, although I've made a LOT of progress). Perhaps with No S, you're essentially running a trial to see how to handle your feelings of deprivation, and it might take some experimenting with your diet to suit your various idiosyncrasies. Inevitably these experiments will sometimes produce a failure. Allowing yourself a cup of cocoa was one in a series of experiments and you've learned that it makes you uncomfortable about your boundaries. That's good, and calorically not so bad (hey, it was better than one of my experiments with having a tin of almonds around, albeit a small one...Conclusion? Don't keep those almonds around the house at all!).

--H

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