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The Blessings of Simplicity
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 2:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,
The month is up! Hope it's been good for you. I'm looking forward to/dreading Thanksgiving because of all the food! My goal is to eat a delicious meal without eating so much on Thanksgiving Day that I feel sick.
How are things going for you?
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 1:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

RESET Diet

R: Record weight.
E: Exercise by doing daily Pilates and walking an average of 10,000 steps per day.
S: Sit down to eat, if possible.
E: Eat without distraction, if possible.
T: Take hands or utensils off food while chewing.

I am being brief because I have to use an iPad to type.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Amy C.



Joined: 30 Aug 2014
Posts: 44

PostPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 12:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
RESET Diet

R: Record weight.
E: Exercise by doing daily Pilates and walking an average of 10,000 steps per day.
S: Sit down to eat, if possible.
E: Eat without distraction, if possible.
T: Take hands or utensils off food while chewing.

I am being brief because I have to use an iPad to type.

I like that plan!
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walkerlori



Joined: 11 Jan 2008
Posts: 987
Location: new mexico

PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 10:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

HAPPY THANKSGIVING KATHLEEN!!!
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Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables.
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Sun Jan 04, 2015 4:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Kathleen.
Update when you have a chance.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Jan 12, 2015 3:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: January 12, 2015


Weight Summary:
Day 1 - Monday, January 12, 2015: 225.6
Day 2 – Tuesday, January 13, 2015:
Day 3 – Wednesday, January 14, 2015:
Day 4 – Thursday, January 15, 2015:
Day 5 – Friday, January 16, 2015:
Day 6 – Saturday, January 17, 2015:
Day 7 – Sunday, January 18, 2015:
Day 8 – Monday, January 19, 2015:
Day 9 – Tuesday, January 20, 2015:
Day 10 – Wednesday, January 21, 2015:
Day 11 – Thursday, January 22, 2015:
Day 12 – Friday, January 23, 2015:
Day 13 – Saturday, January 24, 2015:
Day 14 – Sunday, January 25, 2015:
Day 15 – Monday, January 26, 2015:
Day 16 – Tuesday, January 27, 2015:
Day 17 – Wednesday, January 28, 2015:
Day 18 – Thursday, January 29, 2015:
Day 19 – Friday, January 30, 2015:
Day 20 – Saturday, January 31, 2015:


Journal for Month

Day 1 – Monday, January 12, 2015:

Hi walkerlori and Eurbabe2,

I did not stick with this approach and got tangled in an awful project which just consumed me until Christmas. There still are some Christmas cards to go out! I'm done with that contract, but have an interview this afternoon for another contract and am not sure what I'm doing. We do not have financial problems. Should I work or not? It may be that I'll study at home to burnish my credentials and focus on health. Not sure yet...

As for my weight, not good... I have had the notion that there is some magic fix, and I tried No S for quiet a while. Over Christmas break (my life still revolves around my kids' schedules), I reread the book The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. There was a study done which showed that people who kept food journals became more cognizant of their eating habits which was a first step to changing them: "Food journals provided a structure for other habits to flourish."

I decided to have a very simple diet: record weight and food eaten daily, along with time eating, hunger level before eating, and satiety level after eating. Along with that, I am recommitting to 10,000 steps per day as well as my strengthening exercises.
Day 2 – Tuesday, January 13, 2015:
Day 3 – Wednesday, January 14, 2015:
Day 4 – Thursday, January 15, 2015:
Day 5 – Friday, January 16, 2015:
Day 6 – Saturday, January 17, 2015:
Day 7 – Sunday, January 18, 2015:
Day 8 – Monday, January 19, 2015:
Day 9 – Tuesday, January 20, 2015:
Day 10 – Wednesday, January 21, 2015:
Day 11 – Thursday, January 22, 2015:
Day 12 – Friday, January 23, 2015:
Day 13 – Saturday, January 24, 2015:
Day 14 – Sunday, January 25, 2015:
Day 15 – Monday, January 26, 2015:
Day 16 – Tuesday, January 27, 2015:
Day 17 – Wednesday, January 28, 2015:
Day 18 – Thursday, January 29, 2015:
Day 19 – Friday, January 30, 2015:
Day 20 – Saturday, January 31, 2015:[u][/u]
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 7:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: January 20, 2015

Weight

Day 1 – Tuesday, January 20, 2015: 226.0
Day 2 – Wednesday, January 21, 2015: 224.4
Day 3 – Thursday, January 22, 2015: 223.8
Day 4 – Friday, January 23, 2015: 225.2
Day 5 – Saturday, January 24, 2015:
Day 6 – Sunday, January 25, 2015:
Day 7 – Monday, January 26, 2015: 222.8
Day 8 – Tuesday, January 27, 2015:
Day 9 – Wednesday, January 28, 2015: 224.4
Day 10 – Thursday, January 29, 2015: 224.6
Day 11 – Friday, January 30, 2015:
Day 12 – Saturday, January 31, 2015:


Journal

Day 1 – Tuesday, January 20, 2015: 226.0
Yesterday was a day off school, so Katie, Ellie and I went with another mother and daughter to see the winter nesting area for eagles on the Missisippi River about 2 hours from Minneapolis. We had a late lunch and did not get home for dinner until about 6:15. The girls had music lessons starting at 7:30. Ellie requested spaghetti, so I had it ready about 6:45 PM.

Ellie looked at it and said, "I'm not hungry. We had a late lunch." What did I do? I accepted what she said, and she threw out her food.

This morning, I weighed in at 226.0. I thought, "Enough!" I think I need to model my behavior on my daughter's behavior.

It took a few hours to figure this out while I ate through muffins, a peanut butter sandwich, a cookie, and who knows what else.

Then I stopped.

Wait for hunger.

That is it. Anything else is a distraction. What could be simpler than this?

7 PM: I've tried this darn approach a number of times and for a long time considered The Hunger Satisfaction Diet the absolute worst diet I had ever tried. I think I know why: you must, absolutely must, be faithful to it. No cheating. I have no idea why this is. My experience has been that it is very, very difficult to switch from eating for any other reason to eating for hunger and back again.

My Dad grew up near three bachelor uncles who lived together and were alcoholics. They made quite an impression on him because he was absolutely terrified one of us kids would become an alcoholic. He used to say, "Occasionally drunk at 25 is occasionally sober at 50." I think overeating might be like getting drunk. Did I ever drink a lot when I was young? Yes. Do I now? No. Never. I drink. I never get drunk. I think I need to look at overeating like getting drunk, something so distasteful that I never, ever do it.

Day 2 – Wednesday, January 21, 2015: 224.4
I pulled out of submissions for contract positions and said I was only open to part time work which means I am very likely not to get a job until this fall when I will be open to full time. That gives me the ability to focus on my family and also change my habit of eating for reasons other than hunger. This morning, I did not get hungry until about 9:30 and then had a very small bowl of muesli (maybe 1/4 cup?) and a small apple. I have become someone who eats for so many reasons it is difficult to name them, and now I am focusing on just eating when hungry. I basically never get hungry because I've already eaten, so this is a huge change. I'm also tracking steps walked, and the dog is letting me know it is time to go out.

6:30 PM: I have had about 1/4 cup of muesli and an apple today and am waiting impatiently to get hungry again. How can it be I have had less than 500 calories today and am not hungry? Someone sent me a message to suggest the books of Gillian Riley, and I ordered the book Eating Less: Say Goodbye to Overeating. Sounds like a good title for me!

Day 3 – Thursday, January 22, 2015: 223.8
It was unsettling to me to think that one time of faltering would destroy my diet, like an alcoholic thinking "One is too many, and a million is too few." I had a chocolate-covered banana when not hungry, and it plain did not taste that great. In fact, it did not taste at all. I think it is best for me to focus on the taste of food as a way to determine if I should eat or not. If it doesn't taste that great, why am I eating it?

Day 4 – Friday, January 23, 2015: 225.2
I am still standing. I did not restart my count for days. This was not a catastrophe. It was a stumble. It is possible to switch back and forth between eating due to physical hunger and eating for other reasons, but it is difficult and exhausting. I cannot believe it, but I slept until 9 am this morning and let Tom take the kids to school. How kind of him! He knows I am having difficulty dealing with the fact that I will only accept part time work, which reduces my likelihood of getting a contract close to nil. He did not get a bonus or pay increase last September, which means the company is forcing him out. He is looking for work. I need to take as much off his plate as possible, and here I am sleeping in until 9. My Dad was right, "Occasionally drunk at 25 is occasionally sober at 50." It is important for me not to overeat, but it is possible for me to recover. I just need to face the consequences of overeating so that the perceived cost is so much higher than the benefit that I don't overeat!

2:30 PM: The kids come home in 1/2 hour. I do have plenty to do but think my number one priority is to learn how to eat for hunger only. I had an entire bowl of popcorn. Why? It's so hard to adjust to not having a stomach absolutely stuffed. We go to visit my parents in California in two months. Maybe I could make just a two month commitment. I think it might be wise not to weigh myself until after our return because a slight fluction in weight can result in a change in eating habits: eating out of discouragement or over confidence.

Day 7 – Monday, January 26, 2015: 222.8
Yesterday was enlightening in a miserable way. I waited for hunger and was not happy that I had made a special breakfast strata and could not eat it, so I took Katie on several short errands to pass the time. By the time I got home, I had felt the very first indications of hunger but not had a hunger growl, so I thought "Good enough" and went ahead and ate the strata followed by a lot of other food. I ended up just going out by myself for an hour, on a mission to find good frames for our children's pictures but really to THINK.

I ended up thinking about one key idea from an online MOOC I am taking, which was to focus on process rather than product. What process could I follow? I concluded there really is only one that needs to be followed, and that is to wait for a hunger growl. Yes, my stomach makes other noises, but I can distinguish between a hunger growl and other noises.

I don't have to count calories or write down what I eat or follow rules for how or when I eat. All I have to do is wait for hunger and then eat what I want.

Day 9 – Wednesday, January 28, 2015: 224.4
I had an hour-long personal training session yesterday. It was not necessary to have an hour-long one, but it feels luxurious to take an hour. We had time to chat. I told Kayla that I felt ready to take on aerobic exercise now, since I am not working and will not be working full time at least until fall. To my surprise, she recommended against that. She said I should focus on being consistent with walking 10,000 steps per day. I started counting steps last week on Day 1 and am now committed to a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day. She recommended that I walk faster if I want more aerobic activity and said that, at my age, I don't need anything more strenuous. That was heartening to hear because, to be honest, I do not like to sweat and do not like sitting on an exercise bike. After PT, I realized that my pedometer tracks aerobic steps as well as total steps. How convenient! I can at least write down the number of aerobic steps.

We then went to the touchy topic of weight. I told her I was planning to wait for a hunger growl every day. After we talked, I realized I was never ever going to be consistent with this. Never. There will always be exceptions. What to do? I'm back to the three ideas I got from the book
The Seven Secrets of Slim People: sit down, eat without distraction, and take hand or fork away from food while eating. Simple. I cannot always follow these rules but can evaluate if it is socially appropriate to do so, and usually it is. I don't have to read the paper while eating. If forced to choose between reading the paper and eating, I will at least sometimes choose reading the paper.

One month until my next PT. If I just settle on this approach -- follow those guidelines, walk 10,000 steps, and do my 10 minutes/day of strengthening exercises, then I will be able to see what results next month. If I keep switching what I am doing, I'll never get anywhere. This is a test. It may not work, but I need to at least give it a shot.

1:44 PM: On the way home from having coffee with a friend, I stopped at Costco and bought their super expensive organic honeycrisp apples. We probably should not be buying them because they are so expensive, but I did. I had a cheese sandwich and then the apple, only I could not finish it. Why? Does eating slowly actually lead to eating less? The rest of the apple went in the refrigerator to be eaten later. Time will tell if this approach works, but it sure is a good sign that I did not finish that apple. Honeycrisp apples rank in the top 10 of enjoyable foods for me.

Day 10 – Thursday, January 29, 2015: 224.6
I cannot be discouraged by minor fluctuations in weight. What I am committed to doing now may not result in a weight loss, which means I will need to add to what I am doing, but it will improve my health. I am so happy that all I need to do for aerobic exercise is fast walking. The dog is hovering near me, now accustomed to getting walks. She has her ears perked up. She is certainly accustomed to my taking her for walks!

2 pm: I quickly figured out that following those eating rules was insufficient to deter me from snacking on Trader Joe's cheesecake, and I ended up going to Target to buy a silver plated ring to substitute for the wedding ring I took off more than two years ago. I need to wait for hunger.

5:30 pm: Weighing myself is a good way for me to see if I am doing something that works, but weighing myself daily may be a bad idea because it puts the focus on result rather than process. I think I'll try to limit weighing myself to once per week.

Day 11 – Friday, January 30, 2015:
Day 12 – Saturday, January 31, 2015:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2015 4:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

February 6, 2015: I had it right back in November:
RESET Diet

R: Record weight.
E: Exercise by doing daily Pilates and walking an average of 10,000 steps per day.
S: Sit down to eat, if possible.
E: Eat without distraction, if possible.
T: Take hands or utensils off food while chewing.

Yesterday, I had coffee with another stay at home Mom, and we talked for four hours! I felt as though I was coming out of a fog, the fog of focusing on work instead of family.

Tom is not unhappy about this. He wants me to concentrate on home so he can concentrate on work. I am studying for a certificate that can help me when I do return to the job market.

In the meantime, I decided that I should work on what I know I can commit to doing, and that is exactly what is above.

Day 1: February 6, 2015: 242.2 pounds.

I am reminded of what I heard when I stopped in a talk at the Mayo Clinic: "The best exercise is the type you are willing to do." Well, that applies to diet as well. This is what I am willing to do. While the approach is limited and not likely to result in a lot of weight loss, I am willing to do it. Maybe someday I can build on it, but for now, this is a step in the right direction.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2015 2:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: February 8, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Sunday, February 8, 2015: 222.0




Journal
Day 1 – Sunday, February 8, 2015: 222.0

Starting over. Here is what I have decided to follow:
T: Trust in the process.
R: Record weight at least once per month.
U: Understand the value of avoiding distractions while eating.
S: Sit down to eat, when possible.
T: Take hands or utensils away from food while eating.

In addition, I am going to count a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day. This is a really simple approach. I need to trust it will result in weight loss if I follow it consistently. There is nothing dramatic here. I need to be disciplined to get to 10,000 steps per day, but it really isn't that hard. I'm not too sure about the value of daily weigh-ins, but monthly is certainly a good idea.

Day 2 – Monday, February 9, 2015:
It occurred to me that not weighing myself is a way to demonstrate trusting in the process. I won't lose weight by weighing myself daily. I will lose weight by developing habits which result in my eating less and exercising more.

My strengthening exercises amount to less than 15 minutes per day, but I am very consistent in following them. Now I need to be consistent in walking an average of 10,000 steps/day.

Day 3 – Tuesday, February 10, 2015:
Yesterday afternoon, I got a book from the author that was recommended to me: Gillian Riley. I got the book Eating Less. It is kind of shocking to read. It synthesizes things I have started to believe, like that weighing yourself is distracting and counterproductive. I concluded I should weigh myself once per month only and write down what I eat. It will take some time to absorb the lessons from the book, but it indicates to me that I am on the right path.

1 PM: I am making this too complicated: walk an average of 10,000 steps per day, do my 15 minutes max/day of strengthening exercises, and record what I eat. Period. Recording what I eat makes overeating self-correcting, since who wants to record..... let's see, a bowl of popcorn.

Day 4 – Wednesday, February 11, 2015:
There is a big "ick" factor associated with writing down what I eat. I ate a ton after school and before dinner, so much that it was embarrassing to write it all out even if I was the only one reading what I wrote. I don't have the drive to change what I am doing because I did not weigh myself, and I am less motivated to drop any of my three commitments (walking, strength training, and recording what I eat and how much I walk) because that is all I am doing. I've tossed aside the eating rules. Next month, I will weigh myself. The big question is: Do I have sufficient motivation to eat less? I cannot face opening that Gillian Riley book right now. I've gotten enough out of it to be overwhelmed!

Day 5 – Thursday, February 12, 2015:
I read half of a chapter of that book last night and put it away. There are a lot of good points in the book. The very beginning is that it is impractical to eat only when hungry, something I keep on testing and learning.

Day 6 – Friday, February 13, 2015:
Day 7 – Saturday, February 14, 2015:
Day 8 – Sunday, February 15, 2015:
Day 9 – Monday, February 16, 2015:
Day 10 – Tuesday, February 17, 2015:
Day 11 – Wednesday, February 18, 2015:


Day 12 – Thursday, February 19, 2015:
Day 13 – Friday, February 20, 2015:
Day 14 – Saturday, February 21, 2015:
Day 15 – Sunday, February 22, 2015:
Day 16 – Monday, February 23, 2015:
Day 17 – Tuesday, February 24, 2015:
Day 18 – Wednesday, February 25, 2015:
[
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Feb 17, 2015 6:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: February 17, 2015

Weight
Tuesday, February 17, 2015: above 220.0 pounds

Day 2 - Wednesday, February 18, 2015: 226.0 pounds


Journal
Tuesday, February 17, 2015: There were things I liked about the Gillian Riley book, and there were things I did not like. I think prioritization of eating habits over today's weight is a good idea, so I decided to try to weigh myself only once per month. That's enough. I am quite confident I weigh above 220 today, but does it really matter if it is 222 or 226?

There's a lot of choice in this book, which means there is a lot of thinking involved in working your way out of overeating. My gut feel is this is not a good approach, and I am not sure why.

I look at what I am doing with exercise and think it should be a good model for overeating. Admittedly, it has only been 9 days, but I am 1,920 steps above an average of 10,000 steps per day.

I'm restarting the count today, however, because I am going to add three eating habits: sitting down when eating, eating without distraction, and taking hands or utensil away from food while eating.

That's what I'm doing for Lent -- bringing some discipline into my eating.

Over time, I'm hoping that the discipline I apply today will result in habits tomorrow.

Gillian Riley's approach is about telling yourself you get to make the choice. I just do not think that would work for me because I would choose to eat! The 10,000 step per day approach is one I have tried a few times, and one time I decided I should just mark down my steps per day and not worry about hitting a rolling average. Instantly, and I mean instantly, my number of steps dropped to 7,000 or so.

I think I need specific habits to follow. Specific and few. This looks good. I'll see how much I weigh at Easter.

Day 2 - Wednesday, February 18, 2015: 226.0 pounds I got down to 222.0 pounds one day last week, and look this! The exercise program seems to work well, but I am not sure if consistency is what is needed in a diet. I don't know -- it's discouraging, to say the least. It occurred to me in answering the question on No S Diet that there are clear rules that are not followed all the time. What if I combined No S Diet rules with the idea of losing a few pounds at a time and then maintaining for a month?

Let's say I try following No S rules until I weigh in under 215 pounds and then wait a month to stabilize my weight...

7 pm: Ash Wednesday. A good day to follow No S rules. I believe I have combined the No S Diet with the Novena Diet, only making it so I take a break after reaching a specific weight. I feel much less full than normal and may have trouble sleeping as a result.

Tonight, I looked at a video of a woman who lost a lot of weight and needed surgery to remove extra skin. It made me think: I need to lose weight very slowly.


Day 4 - Friday, February 20, 2015: 226.6 pounds Oh, ick... I think I need to follow a nine day plan and then take a break. Today is my Day 1 of a Novena Diet. A novena is a Catholic prayer that a person repeats for nine days. It may sound silly, but I tend to think the Catholic Church has a handle on how people really operate. Maybe nine days is the limit of what a person can follow and focus on. I am going to follow No S rules for 9 days, to the extent that I can, and see where I stand. I just went into the kitchen to scavenge and decided not to scavenge because it is only nine days. No weighing myself, either. I tend to change course when I weigh myself.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Fri Feb 20, 2015 4:33 pm; edited 6 times in total
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gingerpie



Joined: 06 Apr 2014
Posts: 754
Location: Pennsylvania, US

PostPosted: Tue Feb 17, 2015 8:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,

Quote:
There's a lot of choice in this book, which means there is a lot of thinking involved in working your way out of overeating. My gut feel is this is not a good approach, and I am not sure why.


My gut would would tell me the same thing because . . . when I think about food . . . I eat food. Rolling Eyes

I'm sorry I didn't read all of your back post but I'm wondering why you have chosen not to follow vanilla No-s? If feels to me as though the issues you talk about would largely be addressed by the no-snacks, no-sweets, no-seconds rules and it would address your desire for simplicity as well.

Thank you for sharing your very open and honest journal with us. It gives amazing insight into where you are in the process.

Regards,
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TexArk



Joined: 27 Dec 2008
Posts: 681
Location: Foothills of the Ozarks

PostPosted: Tue Feb 17, 2015 9:09 pm    Post subject: regarding choice Reply with quote

I would just like to say that when Gillian Riley says that we have choice, she means that when we are faced with an addictive desire to overeat (for instance, get a second helping or eat in between meals) we need to make a conscious choice. I either choose to live with the unpleasantness of unfulfilled desire for the moment and wait until the next meal OR I choose to go ahead and overeat which means I am also choosing to accept the consequences (disappointment in myself, heartburn, not feeling light, etc.) I am free to make the choice. And I only have to make that choice for the present time. She says this frees me from setting up rules, breaking them, and starting over or feeling like I am enslaved by rules without a choice. Each time I am tempted to overeat, I have a choice.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Feb 18, 2015 12:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

gingerpie,
I did follow No S for quite a while and got down to about 195 and then got stuck. Part of the problem was S Days became Stomach Ache days. I have come to the conclusion that, at least for me, whatever eating habits I follow have to be followed all the time.
Kathleen

TexArk,
Thanks for clarifying. I may need to think through this book some more. A big point of the book is that you are in charge of yourself. I already know that. I chirp it to my kids all the time.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 3:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You mean there is nothing possible in between N days and Stomach Ache S days?

As someone else said, when it gets more painful to keep overeating than to choose not to, it will weaken the pull. The pull will not go away, but it will seem more doable to let it be there while you go about your business and wait for your one-plate meal. Even after five years, I still sometimes have to exert some effort to eat moderately on weekends. I still sometimes WANT to go a bit wild! But the memory of how unpleasant it was to do so is more obvious, and N days have shown me so many times that it's preferable to feel less full.

If you don't get to the point at which you actually prefer the feeling of eating less MOST of the time, it will continue to be hard going. AND you have to be willing to MINIMIZE the sense of pleasure you get from overeating, as well as how hard you interpret it to be to curtail that. MAXIMIZE in your mind how much pleasure you're missing out on by overeating. Most overeaters do the opposite. It's probably one of the most important habits they need to change.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 5:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

oolala53,
It never got better. I think I'm a person who feels most comfortable within rules. For example, an average of 10,000 steps per day works great for me. What I think I will try is to follow No S rules to lose five pounds and then let my eating adjust to that new lower weight for a month. I think the overeating has to be ratcheted down. It is nice that I should not work. I could go to the gym and walk two miles before coming home, since it was -9 degrees this morning and I have a dog that has no interest in going out!
Kathleen
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Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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ironchef



Joined: 30 Jul 2012
Posts: 1453
Location: Australia

PostPosted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 11:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
oolala53,
What I think I will try is to follow No S rules to lose five pounds and then let my eating adjust to that new lower weight for a month.

To me the advantage of No S is building automatic habits, i.e. "this is just how I eat now". Going on and off No S every few weeks / few pounds would seem likely to keep you permanently in the high willpower "habit building" phase. Stopping No S after a few pounds would probably also cause those few pounds to return, which I could imagine might be quite discouraging.
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gingerpie



Joined: 06 Apr 2014
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Location: Pennsylvania, US

PostPosted: Fri Feb 20, 2015 1:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen,

I'm curious about your plans to stop no-s after losing 5 pounds. Assuming you follow no-s sufficiently to lose 5 pounds, it is doubtful that you would loose it in less than 5 weeks Therefore, wouldn't that be enough time for your body to be adjusting to less food? To "ratchet down" as you put it. Given that no-s depends heavily on habit building, I, like ironchef, would be concerned that starting and stopping the diet would make it especially difficult to establish firm habits which would, I think, require additonal will power and put you at risk for regaining what you lost.

I noticed in some of your posts that you seem to like structure and rules around your meals/eating.

Might I suggest you follow the structure of no-s primarily (the rules after all are very clear and not at all flexible if followed diligently. If you feel you need further restrictions (i.e. the "RESET" diet; waiting for hunger; set your utensils down between bites etc.) add them to help tame your s-days so they do not become stomach ache days but let the no-s rules guide your non-s-days.

I hope you don't mind my 2-cents worth. I mean only to give helpful ideas to support you on your journey.

good luck and best regards.
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freegirl



Joined: 08 Oct 2011
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Location: Toronto, Canada

PostPosted: Fri Feb 20, 2015 3:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,

I'll write what work for me, maybe you'll find some useful tips there. I am focusing on habits, not so much on weight loss. I fee much better when I don't eat sweets, and when I avoid snacking. Feeling better is what counts, weight loss will follow. I am not following no snacks rule strictly: I avoid snacks, because I like experiencing real hunger, and satisfaction after eating. But I usually have an afternoon snack.

I enjoy having more energy, being able to endure hunger for longer periods, feeling in control, and still eating delicious food. I no longer view my body as a shape that I don't like, I appreciate it for everything it is doing for me. And I am starting to treat it with kindness and love.

All the best in your journey. I wish you to find your balance soon.
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Kathleen



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2015 3:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

February 24, 2015: 226.4 pounds

Habit is good for exercise: there is no doubt about it. I was able to start and continue a habit of doing strengthening exercises twice daily. It's easy: it fits right into other good habits like flossing my teeth.

I believe managing weight might be different for those of us who became obese. I believe intermittent reinforcement of good habits might be a better way to go. That means I focus on eating habits for a tolerable period of time and then allow a rest.

With exercise, you do not do it constantly. With managing food intake, it needs to be constant.

I decided to set up my hour-long PT with Kayla tomorrow but then ask for a PT session next week to review how I did in following No S rules for 9 days. I think I'm going to follow No S for nine days at a time and see how I can drop weight doing this.

This morning, I was looking up at Katie and realized either she grew or I shrank. Well, I'm 56, she is 15, and on 9/29/14, we were exactly the same height. I have now shrunk. Ick. I do not want to die fat.
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NoelFigart



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Location: Lebanon, NH

PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2015 3:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
I do not want to die fat.


I am not going to say being heavy is great. We wouldn't be here if we thought it was, now would we?

However, this hit me in the emotions. You see, I have an aunt that was heavy most of her life. Amazing woman. Loved life, devoted to her family, utterly no-nonsense, creative (she did some of the greatest artwork just from stuff she picked up off the beach). I loved her.

Yes, past tense, because she's dead now.

She didn't die fat. I assure you she would have preferred to live fat. She died of pancreatic cancer and she died skinny. Quite painfully skinny. This is a type of cancer where most people only live months after the diagnosis.

She lived several years after hers. One of the things she used to comment on was that she believes she survived as long as she did through the chemo and what have you was because she was heavy. In fact, the last summer we were able to go to the beach with her, she said, "Yes, take care of your health, but don't put your entire focus on your weight. You have no idea how much time you have left and it would be tragic to waste it."
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Feb 25, 2015 2:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: February 25, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Wednesday, February 25, 2015: 225.0




Journal
Day 1 – Wednesday, February 25, 2015: 225.0


NoelFigart,
That is quite touching. I am feeling my age. I have been very concerned about my husband because he has a job that is just brutal: travel every week, late nights working or entertaining clients.

How long do each of us have to live, and are we doing what is best? I think I've been on an inappropriate path, focused more on my career than my family. Katie once said to me, ""You said family would always be your priority." That made me feel terrible.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015: This morning, I got up and weighed 225.0 -- again. I have my monthly personal training appointment with Kayla and decided I would set up weekly 1/2 hour sessions through the end of the month.

My weight is about more than me. It's about modeling good behavior to our children. Now that I am walking, both Tom and the kids are exercising more. Katie and Ellie went swimming last night. Tom went for a walk with me last Saturday.

It's also about eating. I am working on getting better food in the house -- watermelon for snack instead of cupcake.

2 PM: I met with my personal trainer, and we agreed I would follow the SET guidelines (Sit down, eat without distraction, and take hand or utensil away from food while chewing). I'm going to meet with her next Wednesday as a way to account for what I have done for one week.

Day 2 – Thursday, February 26, 2015:
I decided not to weigh myself this morning and just wait until next Wednesday until I see my personal trainer again. After meeting with her, I went to Costco and bought both the caramel clusters and the chocolate covered almonds. Why? Well, those are two of the most tempting foods I know. If I can follow the SET Diet rules, walk 10,000 steps per day, and still lose weight, then I know this is a good approach.

It may sound ridiculous because a calorie is a calorie whether or not it is consumed quickly. True. I do not deny that reality. The question in my mind is whether or not I will eat less if I follow those rules, and my hunch is I will. There is some benefit to eating like an automatic eating machine. It produces an altered state somehow, something I cannot quite describe and don't again want to experience. I eat for the effect and not the pleasure, like an alcoholic who drinks to get drunk and not to enjoy the experience of drinking.

Over the past several days, I have watched several episodes of Extreme Weight Loss and some youtube videos on binge eating, which is now diagnosed as a mental illness. A new mental illness. I suspect that this mental illness has a physical cause: the body revolting against dieting.

With this approach, I can eat whatever I want and just have to slow down to eat.

It will be interesting to see how much I weigh next Wednesday. I can discuss the results with my personal trainer before I decide what to do next, but at least I am committed to one approach for a week.

As I told my personal trainer yesterday, I feel like I am on a circuit. I hop from diet to diet with increasing speed and go no where. It is time to settle down, and I think my best bet is to create habits I am willing to follow for the rest of my life.

7 pm: I ate a ton today. Tonight, as I was eating a dinner of lamb and rice, I realized I was already stuffed -- so why was I eating? Then I realized: I am waiting for the other shoe to drop, for me to have to do something else. Well, do I have to do something else, something more? Maybe not. Last month, when Kayla told me that 10,000 steps per day was enough for cardio, I was so relieved. I didn't even realize how much I hated that bike!

Well, maybe my inconsistency with walking had to do with thinking I would have to add the exercise bike once I had the walking habit down. I am so relieved, and Tom even wants to get that bike out of our basement where it is adding to clutter! Maybe I'm going to sabotage the SET rules as a way to keep from adding to them.

Only I get it. I get that that is exactly what I am doing. Instead, I can accept the weight that comes from following these very easy rules and be done with weight management.

Wishful thinking? Maybe. I think I need to make at least a year long commitment to this diet. Maybe I can start something next Lent if what I am doing today turns out to be insufficient.

I will see for the New Year. If by New Year's, I am not happy with my progress, then I can try to add something for Lent.


Day 4 – Saturday, February 28, 2015: 225.0
I waffled. Yesterday afternoon, I did some eating standing up in the kitchen. This morning, I decided I should switch to eating only when hungry, thinking I may have gained up to 228.0, a new high. To my surprise, I was at 225. I thought I was eating all the time. It was true. Having to follow those three guidelines made me slow down and realize just how much I was eating. Maybe this will work after all. I may not have lost weight in the last three days, but I also did not gain any. Going forward, I think I'll be less willing to spend so much time eating if I am not hungry. Even home and bored, I have things to do: this weekend, we are prepping Ellie's room so I can paint it a color of her choosing. She finally got her own room, so she gets to choose paint color and bedspread.

5:19 PM: Digestion growl. I was still digesting yesterday's food.


Last edited by Kathleen on Thu Mar 05, 2015 11:21 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Mar 01, 2015 5:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: March 1, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Sunday, March 1, 2015: 227.0
Day 2 – Monday, March 2, 2015: 226.8
Day 3 – Tuesday, March 3, 2015: 225.4
Day 4 – Wednesday, March 4, 2015: 224.0
Day 5 – Thursday, March 5, 2015: 225.2
Day 6 – Friday, March 6, 2015: 225.6
Day 7 – Saturday, March 7, 2015:
Day 8 – Sunday, March 8, 2015:
Day 9 – Monday, March 9, 2015:
Day 10 – Tuesday, March 10, 2015:
Day 11 – Wednesday, March 11, 2015:
Day 12 – Thursday, March 12, 2015:
Day 13 – Friday, March 13, 2015:
Day 14 – Saturday, March 14, 2015:
Day 15 – Sunday, March 15, 2015:
Day 16 – Monday, March 16, 2015:
Day 17 – Tuesday, March 17, 2015:
Day 18 – Wednesday, March 18, 2015:
Day 19 – Thursday, March 19, 2015:
Day 20 – Friday, March 20, 2015:
Day 21 – Saturday, March 21, 2015:
Day 22 – Sunday, March 22, 2015:
Day 23 – Monday, March 23, 2015:
Day 24 – Tuesday, March 24, 2015:
Day 25 – Wednesday, March 25, 2015:
Day 26 – Thursday, March 26, 2015:
Day 27 – Friday, March 27, 2015:
Day 28 – Saturday, March 28, 2015:
Day 29 – Sunday, March 29, 2015:
Day 30 – Monday, March 30, 2015:
Day 31 – Tuesday, March 31, 2015:


Journal
Day 1 – Sunday, March 1, 2015: 227.0

On Thursday, I took Ellie to her annual physical. She is a "late bloomer" like our other kids. Unlike Anne and Katie, however, she only gained weight before puberty. She stabilized in weight this last year and gained in height. Katie and Anne kept gaining weight.

I have been thinking about that, especially as I have been cleaning out her closet because that reminded me of Tom spying some old outfits of the kids in my closet. He pulled out one top and said he did not recognize it. I chuckled and showed him the tag. I said that my mother and Katie had taken Ellie shopping, found a top that looked spectacular on her, and bought it for her over her objections. She never wore it.

Ellie is the one who will not eat if she is not hungry.

I believe I am at the end of the road. I believe that I have a problem with my weight that is manifest because of the culture, and that problem is that I can either eat because I'm hungry or eat for any other reason. If I eat when I'm not hungry, I cannot stop. That is why I set up rules for eating, and this failure upon failure started when I chunked up just before puberty.

My father was upset with my weight of 132 at 5'6", and I tried -- and tried and tried.

Now I look back at 40 years of failure and think what I want most of all is for two of my daughters not to continue in the path I have trod. That is part of the reason why I have been so persistent in trying to lose weight. I really did not think it practical to eat only when hungry.

Well, practical or not, I think that is the only path to success. The only path. Nothing else is sustainable because nothing else is tolerable for the long run.

It does take a willingness to push back, to refuse to eat food when you are not hungry.

Tom actually gets upset with Ellie when she does not eat. Tom gets upset when she refuses to eat food she does not like.

I have allowed her to eat junk food, but now home and having more time to think this through, I am more able to figure out what she likes that is good for her and get it for her. We now have watermelon in the refrigerator, for example.

What do I like? Do I ever consider what I like? Yes and no. I will eat just about anything because food is equally tasteless when you are not hungry. That is part of the reason why I eat fast and without focusing on eating. What I am trying to do is get to a level of satiety rather than to enjoy food in the present.

I came up with this analogy last summer, but here it is again: I eat until I recognize a change in satiety. If I eat when hungry, I eat until satiety. If I eat when not hungry, I eat until stuffed. My analogy is to hearing a train. If you are standing at a train station before a train comes (like eating when not hungry), you can hear a change as the train starts to pass by (satiety). If the train is already going by (satiety), then you only experience a train as it leaves (stuffed).

What I think might be the problem for me is that I cannot switch between eating when hungry and eating when not hungry, and I am not sure why.

1:32 PM: Epic fail in a matter of hours. Just like tracking my steps motivated me to walk more, so I think I need to look at what I am willing to do for the long haul. I have avoided tracking what I eat, but that is what I will do. I will track what I eat, my weight, hunger level before eating and satisfaction level after eating. Pathetic.

Day 4 – Wednesday, March 4, 2015: 224.0 Today, I meet with my personal trainer again today to discuss my approach to losing weight, which has changed several times in the week since I saw her. I feel resigned, resigned to waiting for hunger always. I do not understand this, but I cannot seem to eat without hunger on occasion (such as for social reasons) and then be able to wait for hunger usually. I just don't get it.

Yesterday, I had crackers and guacamole at about 4 and then have not eaten since. I had not slept well and still feel sick from two weeks ago, so I asked the kids to fend for themselves which they gladly did. Tom told me that I am sick because I am stressed -- he is likely to get a new job which will put us in a better position financially and be less physically demanding for him, and I'm worried about it.

Also, yesterday he sent me a picture that he had of Katie, Ellie and me from about seven years ago. I looked at it, and I was fat.

So much regret dealing with this... Why not take the exit ramp of just eating when hungry?

As I came in the house from taking the girls to school, my stomach growled. Still, I'm not hungry. Right now, my stomach growled even more insistently. It's a precursor to hunger but is still not hunger. I'm going to try to define it.

9 AM: I figured it out: I should eat when the feeling of hunger, however mild, becomes constant. That happened about 15 minutes ago. I ate a custard cup full of muselix with milk (mueslix is very concentrated, and that is my normal portion size for that cereal) and a banana. Now I am satisfied. I have no desire to eat more. As I experienced just yesterday, I tend to eat a lot if I eat even after the first experience of hunger.

Very strange. This is not what I would like to follow in my life, but I am sick of being fat. I need to not eat -- ever -- unless I am experiencing that constant feeling of hunger. Now, do I need to eat immediately? No, it's like a tug. It's not painful. I can wait.

11 AM: I just spent the morning painting in Ellie's room. How do I feel? Full. I can still sense fullness, and that is strange. It feels like being stuffed right eating everything in sight. Why? This is beyond odd. The analogy I have is that my body needs to feel a change after eating, and two approaches work to reach satisfaction: start hungry and end satisfied, or start not hungry and end stuffed.

1 PM: Now, I am beginning to feel the first indications of hunger but am not yet hungry. I need to wait. My personal trainer asked me about confidence that I can do this (high) and motivation. I told her I had given up, and she said that did not sound highly motivated. I told her I felt like the alcoholic who finally faces that "one drink is too much and a million isn't enough" or whatever that saying is. I once picked up the book "Symptoms of Withdrawal" which is a very honest, or seemingly honest, depiction of alcoholism, and it seems to me that I am like that only I can never ever eat except when hungry.

5:30 PM: It was not until about 2:30 PM that I felt hungry, and I had a bowl of cottage cheese. Then I had 1/2 peanut butter sandwich, guacomole, cheese and crackers, on and on. I did not eat in a rushed manner. I just kept feeling hungry and kept eating. By 4, I was stuffed.

Then I went shopping with Ellie, and oh did my stomach hurt! What happened? I think what happened was I ate before I was sufficiently hungry. This was not a failure on my part. It was a misjudgment. If this is what happens when I eat without being sufficiently hungry, then it will be very easy to not want to eat when not hungry because I am somewhat miserable right now. My stomach actually hurts.


Day 5 – Thursday, March 5, 2015: 225.2
Still stuffed. This is unbelievable! I do not know when to eat! I am 56 years old! I need to train myself to listen to my body and learn the point after which I can eat, and this is for my sake. If I eat before that point, I eat and eat to obesity. If I eat at or after that point, I can eat very little and still feel satisfied. This is a much more pleasant outlook than the cloud I have been living under which is I can only be thin if I am miserably hungry.

8 AM: I am going to meet a friend for coffee in about 1/2 hour. Should I get a latte or stick with black coffee? I think I'm going to get a latte even though I'm not hungry, and I'm not sure why that is a good idea. I believe I will end up not eating until dinner because I won't be hungry. Why? I don't know. Maybe it is because it is a liquid?

I need to listen to my body. Am I going back to intuitive eating? No. Intuitive Eating -- at least the book by that name -- has the approach to eat as soon as you experience hunger. That is what I did yesterday afternoon. It was 2:30, I had not yet had lunch, and I could feel hunger. No. That does not work. I need to work on feeling a type of hunger. I don't even have the vocabulary to describe the difference between the hunger I felt yesterday morning and the hunger I felt yesterday afternoon. When I am finishing painting Ellie's room this afternoon, I can think about how to describe the two types of hunger. One word does not help me to distinguish between them.

12:30 PM: I had a latte, and we had coffee until 11. This may sound really self-indulgent, but Moms getting together for coffee are a great way to sort out what to do with kids, and that is what we do when we get together. It was good. I came home and had two slices of banana bread with butter and now, at 12:30, had some cheese. I don't feel the drive to eat.

I am not sure why there is not a drive to eat, but I am wondering if getting to a level of hunger periodically is enough to curb appetite. This leads me back to intermittent fasting.

I think I'm going to try to fast until dinner tomorrow.

5 PM: I ended up having salad, more banana bread, and now some hot water with honey and lemon for my sore throat.

As I was getting coffee this morning, I did experience a stomach grumble and had always thought that was an indicator of hunger. Actually, it's not. Lesson learned from today is that I thought was hunger was not hunger. I need to think about what to clal this so I do not feel deprived when I experience it.

Day 6 – Friday, March 6, 2015: 225.6 As Ellie was leaving this morning, I offered a banana walnut muffin, and she said, "I'm full -- on two pieces of bacon, I'm full." Yep. I have an expert on thinness in my household.

Last night, I realized that the friend with whom I had coffee never ate the food she bought. She decided she wasn't hungry and just took it home.

I'm living in a different universe. It's like what happened with my working full time and now I'm home. The perspective a working woman is very different form mine. Just so, following rules -- any sort of external rules -- for managing weight is a very different experience from that of my daughter who just says, "No thanks. I'm full."

I think I have a distorted view of hunger.

In the summer of 2008, I tried a self-created diet called The Hunger Satisfaction Diet, I got up to 215 by the end of the summer, and I was absolutely miserable.

Now I think I have figured out what went so wrong. I waited for a stomach growl which I thought was indicative of hunger but it actually was just digestion.

Usually I eat before I even experience a digestion growl which I believe might mean that my stomach is starting to empty.

What I am going to try now is to wait for that process to end and then to experience the mild tug of hunger.

I don't have this even close to figured out but have concluded that I need to figure out some sort of eating pattern based on an experience of hunger and fullness which has been distorted by years of eating based on external cues.

Ellie is my model.

8:05 AM: It's a Friday in Lent, and I made bacon and eggs for my family. Funny. We are so rushed we don't have time to think. That's why I'm home, and we are still adjusting.

8:39 AM: Stage 1: feeling of fullness. I have not eaten this morning but did have coffee.
9:55 AM: Stage 2: stomach rumble. Sounds like a good term for it. This is just a mild churning in my stomach which I have interpreted as hunger. It's not. Maybe it's digestion. Maybe it's not. It doesn't really matter so I think an innocuous term like rumble might do. Based on my observation of the last few days, I just don't stop eating if I start now. Need to wait.
11:47 AM: Stage 3: Hunger tug. I experienced what I thought was a tug at 11 and then went to the kitchen and had about 1/4 slice of banana bread. Following that was more food. I knew I was in trouble. Watermelon, popcorn, lentil soup, crackers, milk. Now I am stuffed.

Hunger tug is not the indicator for eating. I should call it a tug.

I now need to wait for what is the indicator of hunger.


Day 8 – Sunday, March 8, 2015
I keep on trying to figure out a middle way to lose weight, and it sure is not working. When I start eating, I just plain don't stop until I feel something. I have now debated doing some sort of start and stop approach where I do this for several days and then stop. The problem is that it is so darn hard to get started. I think I just need to plunge in and only eat when certain I am hungry, not when I feel something like a "hunger tug" as I called it.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 6:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: March 9, 2015

Weight
Day 1 - Monday, March 9, 2015: 225.0
Day 2 – Tuesday, March 10, 2015: 224.2
Day 3 – Wednesday, March 11, 2015: 223.8
Day 4 – Thursday, March 12, 2015:
Day 5 – Friday, March 13, 2015: 225.4
Day 6 – Saturday, March 14, 2015:
Day 7 – Sunday, March 15, 2015:
Day 8 – Monday, March 16, 2015: 225.4
Day 9 – Tuesday, March 17, 2015: 227.2
Day 10 – Wednesday, March 18, 2015: 224.0
Day 11 – Thursday, March 19, 2015:
Day 12 – Friday, March 20, 2015:
Day 13 – Saturday, March 21, 2015:
Day 14 – Sunday, March 22, 2015:
Day 15 – Monday, March 23, 2015:
Day 16 – Tuesday, March 24, 2015:
Day 17 – Wednesday, March 25, 2015:
Day 18 – Thursday, March 26, 2015:
Day 19 – Friday, March 27, 2015:
Day 20 – Saturday, March 28, 2015:
Day 21 – Sunday, March 29, 2015:
Day 22 – Monday, March 30, 2015:
Day 23 – Tuesday, March 31, 2015:


Journal
Day 1 - Monday, March 9, 2015: 225.0
The weather went from -4 last Thursday morning to the 40s on Friday. Snow is melting, and it is mild outside. I decided to get the winter clothing put away before Anne and Tom return from college for spring break on Friday. Because we are headed to California to visit with my parents when Katie and Ellie have spring break in three weeks, I also pulled out my summer clothing.

Surprise. They don't fit. I just got incentive to go through with only eating when hungry.

Day 2 – Tuesday, March 10, 2015: 224.2
I woke up this morning feeling like I had recovered something. I remember how it feels to feel light, and it feels great! Instead of being full, I feel light. The focus for me can be on keeping that feeling of lightness while enjoying food. Last week, when I talked with my personal trainer, she said to me, "Listen to your body." I think that might be the key right there. Instead of creating and following rules, I listen to my body and enjoy the pleasurable feeling of being light.

There is uncertainty for me now because of the week I have weathered. It has really been terrible. I felt like my eating was out of control.

Now my goal will not be a particular weight but rather a particular feeling of lightness.

9 AM: I came home from dropping Katie off at school, and within 1/2 hour had several pancakes and a Haagen Dazs bar I found in the freezer. Now I feel somewhat sick.

Why?

I am speculating that people eat within a narrow band of hunger and fullness. If you eat within a wider range, your body revolts -- binge eating if you eat too little, and feeling sick if you eat too much.

For the last week, I have been on a roller coaster because I have been trying to eat less and have ended up binge eating.

Very interesting. I think that a way to stay within a narrow band that leads to thinness is to fast two days per week because that gets you down in fullness.

What is positive about my feeling sick from overeating is that this has not happened previously in the week. I felt good before I overate, and now I feel lousy having overeaten. That is good.

6 PM: I circled back to the lame advice: "Eat less, exercise more" and realized it was exactly right! Maybe my problem is black and white thinking.

Day 3 – Wednesday, March 11, 2015: 223.8 My use of my pedometer has given me insight into what to do with overeating. I settled on a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day, which I thought was doable. Then Katie got sick and lay in bed for three days, and I caught it and lay in bed for three days and felt tired for another week. I got way behind in steps per day.

It occurred to me I should just track steps. Last week, I got plenty of exercise painting a ceiling and the walls in Ellie's room while wearing exercise clothing that did not have a pocket. No pedometer. Limited number of steps tracked.

That is just fine. I looked at that and thought it was just fine. On Monday and Tuesday, Ellie had that same or a similar sickness and lay in bed. I did not want to go to the gym. Fine. My number of steps reflected that I was home with Ellie.

Today I can be back on track to get to 10,000 steps today. Today is all we have. I can just work on tracking steps.

The issue is that I want to exercise more. Tracking a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day leads to doing it for a time but then having an interruption and stopping. The better approach, I think, is to simply track steps and see how I do.

How does this relate to eating less? Well, I can follow certain guidelines as best I can (the SET guidelines of Sit down to eat, Eat without distractions, and Take hand or utensil away from food while eating), and I can track what I eat. This does not in and of itself result in my eating less, but it can help. If I buy caramel nut clusters from Costco and eat them following those guidelines, I'm going to gain weight. How ridiculous that I actually tested that out two weeks ago, but I did learn.

Last Thursday, it was -4 in the morning. Today, it will reach the 60s. We joke in Minnesota that our four seasons are winter, winter, summer, fall. Spring is always really short, but this year it was particularly short. There is still snow on the ground and people had cars out in the lakes when it was in the 40s on Sunday. Spring is a good time for renewal.

I meet with my personal trainer today and will schedule another time for next week. I want to make sure I have this nailed down. Luckily, we have more than 20 personal training sessions left before we have to buy more. Tom hasn't quite faced that we have less money to spend now that I am not working.

Day 4 – Thursday, March 12, 2015: I did not weigh myself today because I got up late because the girls go to school two hours later than usual today. It is helpful to talk with Kayla in addition to writing here. She is very encouraging, and it is nice for me to talk out loud. Tom long ago tired of my talking about dieting.

Yesterday, I ate two who grapefruit. Why? It fills my stomach, and my stomach is accustomed to being filled. It is almost like an addiction. The question is: How do you get out of this addiction? I think it does help to fill up on foods that are high volume low calorie like grapefruit.

This morning, however, I came back to the idea of fasting. For hundreds of years, Catholics fasted every day except Sundays during Lent. They had only one meal. I think that is a way for the body to adjust to less food.

It is halfway through Lent, and we are going on vacation at the end of the month, and I am going to a breakfast on Saturday morning, but I can do what I can do without impacting others. On school days, I can fast without anyone even knowing that is what I am doing.

I think I will try that. Maybe my goal for this month can be to get below 220. Maybe next month, after Easter, I can fast on school days to get below 215. A five pound per month weight loss seems reasonable.

Day 5 – Friday, March 13, 2015: 225.4 I lasted until 11:20 with fasting yesterday, and then I had two grapefruit, coffee ice cream, split pea soup, and who knows what else. I am cycling through diets with increasing speed due to frustration at my weight. My determination to break this habit of taking on and dumping diets with increasing speed has got to stop, so I am meeting weekly with my personal trainer to break that habit. If nothing else, I'm going to be embarrassed by showing up each week with a new approach.

Is fasting the key? It seems so medieval. It seems so harsh. Maybe, in fact, it is a compassionate way that the Church devised for interrupting the tendency to gluttony. I remember reading in some religious document that the Church would advise more fasting if a person kept falling into gluttony.

Well, it is a simple approach, that is for sure. I remember one week years ago when I fasted 24 hours four days in one week and still gained weight. I think what I am going to try is to have one meal per day. That would be dinner with my family tonight.

Tomorrow, I am going to a breakfast, so I may end up not fasting tomorrow but at least I can try it for today.

3:37 PM: Pathetic. I started eating at 9:30. Now what? Well, I think I need to look at that pedometer and how it has motivated me to exercise more. I realized that I had trouble using the pedometer because I had in the back of my mind that I would start using the exercise bike once I was walking 10,000 steps per day. Kayla said there was no need for me to use the exercise bike.

Am I sabotaging my dieting for fear of what I might force myself to do once i settle in to writing down what I eat? Maybe. Maybe writing down what I eat is all I need to motivate me to eat less, just like using a pedometer is all I need to exercise more.

Day 6 – Saturday, March 14, 2015: I weighed myself at 7:30 at 244.4 pounds, but that was two hours later than usual so I am not making it official. I woke up thinking of the analogy of a balloon being deflated. Making the commitment to only record what I eat (along with time, and starting hunger and ending fullness levels) seemed to deflate something, but what? Fear. Fear that if I succeed with recording my weight, I will add to it. That awful word DIET. DIE with a T. I have been on horrible diets, and I think my fear of going on a diet trumped my desire to be thin so I sabotaged any and all behaviors to lose weight. How ridiculous what I ate yesterday morning: a Haagen Dazs bar, an entire bowl of popcorn, and the rest of the Trader Joe's coffee ice cream at 9:30 in the morning. This is not normal.

I looked at my flabby arms in the mirror this morning and thought that there was a whole lot of fear that drove me to eat so much.

Recording what I eat, like wearing a pedometer, does absolutely no good in and of itself. If wearing a pedometer leads to more exercise, then it does good. If recording what I eat leads to eating less, then it does good. That is what I have to keep in mind. I don't need to attain a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day, just don't like I need to eat under a certain number of calories per day. All I need is a change -- eat less, exercise more. This is not a black and white situation. It is a situation of moving along a continuum.

Day 8 – Monday, March 16, 2015: 225.4 I had the non verbal equivalent of a teenager meltdown thinking about the long term discipline needed to write down what I eat and record what I walk, but I'm over it for now. The saying "Eat less, exercise more" seems so non controversial, and yet there are plenty of people who say it is foolish talk. It's not. I told Kayla that that saying never made sense to me, either. It's almost like Republicans and Democrats talking past each other. They don't have the basis for understanding, just like I didn't. I was in the black and white world of following rules perfectly. Now I know that each day is a new decision. For example, I have my shoes on and am ready to take the talk for a walk. The dog likes this approach!

The book "Eating Less" has been helpful to me in learning to de mistify weight loss. I like the idea of planning ahead an committing to not eat for a certain period of time. Too often, I eat with the first whim that I might want to eat.

2 PM: Tom bought a pie for Pi Day (Pi is 3.14159..., so math kids celebrate Pi Day on 3/14. This year was super special because it was 3/14/15.) I had a tiny slice today and so I laughed at myself wanting to write down "small slice of pie".

Day 9 – Tuesday, March 17, 2015: 227.2 Oh, how awful. I just ate and ate. There was no on switch. There was no off switch. I wonder now if there is a great divide between those who can "Eat less. Exercise more." and those whos imply cannot. Most rely on external rules -- calorie counting, eating three meals per day, etc. No S sure is better than calorie counting, but even a subset of those who follow No S go crazy on S Days. I remember reading somewhere that those who binge over and over on S Days end up not losing weight. That's no surprise. The surprise is why a subset continue, week after week, month after month, to binge on S Days.

This leads me back to waiting for hunger. I think I am at a last resort. There is a black and white aspect to this. Never eat unless hungry. I remember, more than 20 years ago, going to a surprise going away party for someone and we had cake. The guest of honor had her hands in her back pocket and ate no cake. The rest of us were happily digging in.

I need to be like that woman, or like my friend who bought food when I had coffee with her but ended up not eating it because she was not hungry. No one cares. I did not realize until that night that she had not eaten with me.

Wait for hunger.

11:44 AM: Some days are better for starting something like this, and this is a good day. Tom had the day off, and he brought both Anne and Tom to the dentist. I am home alone with the dog, just doing some volunteer work. I had asked Tom to buy some sparkling water, and this is helping me to wait for hunger. So embarassing.

1:21 PM: I failed. Epic fail. Then I took the dog for a walk and realized the only way this was going to work was if I had an aversion to eating without hunger that was as strong as the aversion to comitting adultery. Somehow that is an appropriate analogy because my wedding ring is in the safety deposit box, and I'm sporting a $12 silver-plated band from Target.

I am putting down the pen and putting down the keyboard and putting down the pedometer to focus only on eating when hungry. It will be after Easter when I get back on this site.

Day 10 – Wednesday, March 18, 2015: 224.0 I peeked at my weight this morning and was happy with what I saw. I also realize what is making this transition (to eating only when hungry) successful. I started after eating in the morning. I did not wake up and start. That meant that I was asleep during the time when my stomach was starting to empty, the time when I normally eat. It is 8 AM, and my stomach is now emptier than it normally is when I start to eat. I need to keep busy today until I get to actual hunger.

Transitioning is difficult. Tom could tell I was grumpy about something. Of course, it doesn't help to realize that our higher income last year means we cannot deduct any college expenses. What a way for the goverment to encourage work!

My work now is to figure out how to be a normal weight as a model to two of our children who clearly are going to have weight problems because they already do. All four grew up in this environment, so why are only two overweight? I think there may be some sort of genetic component to this, that some people simply cannot overeat sometimes and return to eating only when hungry. That is my theory.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 1:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: March 19, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Thursday, March 19, 2015: 225.8
Day 2 – Friday, March 20, 2015: 225.0
Day 3 – Saturday, March 21, 2015:
Day 4 – Sunday, March 22, 2015:
Day 5 – Monday, March 23, 2015:
Day 6 – Tuesday, March 24, 2015:
Day 7 – Wednesday, March 25, 2015:
Day 8 – Thursday, March 26, 2015:
Day 9 – Friday, March 27, 2015:
Day 10 – Saturday, March 28, 2015:
Day 11 – Sunday, March 29, 2015:
Day 12 – Monday, March 30, 2015:
Day 13 – Tuesday, March 31, 2015:


Journal
Day 1 - Thursday, March 19, 2015: 225.8
I have some accountability in that I am burning up personal training sessions talking about weight. It seems like a waste, and yet I don't really talk about weight with others and have some entrenched, unhelpful thoughts. Yesterday, I sat down to talk with Kalya and -- even more importantly -- made an appointment for next Wednesday.

I had to think through our discussion before I made these conclusions:
1. Tracking what I eat is helpful because it gives me insight into my eating habits. What have I learned? That I never feel hungry and that, once I start eating, I don't stop until I am stuffed.
2. Use of the pedometer is helpful, so I should continue using it.

I told Kayla I was grumpy waiting for hunger, that it had been 24 hours since I had eaten and I was not yet even one iota hungry. She told me that older women tend to eat very little and that she has many clients who are older women who struggle with this fact and have to really work to be thin. When Igot home, I ate without hunger and then ate and ate. I weighed 224 yesterday morning and 225.8 this morning, so that's a lot of food in my system.

Kayla asked me my objection to waiting for hunger, and I told her it seemed immoderate. It occurred to me last night that fasting until dinner is actually more moderate than waiting for hunger, and maybe this should be my step towards eating appropriately for my age.

Conclusion: I am going to try fasting until dinner daily except when I eating with other people.

My warning to myself: Several years ago, I fasted 24 hours for four days out of a week and gained weight.

11:30 AM: It is way different knowing that I am going to be eating in 6 hours than having to wait for a clear indication of hunger, which could occur in 30 hours or more. This is easier. I always thought fasting a particular period of time was very immoderate, but maybe it is not. Many religions have fasting as part of religious practice. My Catholic faith has watered this down so much as to be virtually meaningly. We are supposed to fast on just two days, Ash Wednesday and Good Friday, and even then the fast is to eat the equivalent of two regular meals and no snacks. That is not much of a fast.

Day 2 – Friday, March 20, 2015: 225.0 I did not last with fasting. I was too grumpy. It did not help that, at noon, Tom asked if I could come downtown to have lunch with him, and I passed. Tom usually travels but is home this week, and I did not want to break the fast. Well, I did soon afterwards. This is not going to work.

What next? Katie, Ellie and Tom wanted to shop at the mall, so I dropped them off, went to Barnes & Noble, and decided to look at the diet books. I ended up buying a book called "The Diet Trap".

Very interesting. I have only read a little into the book, but the starting point is that it is a lost cause to focus on losing weight. What is needed is a focus on what you want, not what you don't want. What you want is health.

There are exercises in the book, starting with the exercise of writing down what you would advise to a friend looking to lose weight. After you do the exercise, you read: "And what good did all these ideas do for you?"

Then there is a section on how people who become overweight try to figure out what is wrong with themselves so they can fix it. That is the section I am now in.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Fri Mar 20, 2015 1:57 pm; edited 1 time in total
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gingerpie



Joined: 06 Apr 2014
Posts: 754
Location: Pennsylvania, US

PostPosted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 12:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,

Fasting between meals is a great way to look at it. Assuming you have three meals a day, that means you would have 3 moderate fasts per day. The after dinner to breakfast fast would be the longest one and completely manageable because you would spend most of it sleeping.

I know waiting to be hungry seems like a sensible approach but many of us don't really recognize true feelings of hunger. We get it confused with emotional feelings of hunger. So, for us, it is best to just eat at regular times but eliminate the snacking. This would be like fasting between meals. Yes, this might make you grumpy and it will probably make you feel lots of uncomfortable feelings as well. keep your journal handy and write whatever comes up. Writing is healthier than eating. Lastly, is Kayla a person you can talk with about feelings as opposed to diet? If not, is there anybody in your life that you feel safe showing your journal entries too? As these are very difficult Issues, I feel you need more consistent support than is possible over a message board.

Good luck and kind regards,
Virginia
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 1:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Virginia,

I've been going to personal training monthly for two years. I had some physical problems which drove me to personal training, and she gave me exercises that I need to do daily or I revert. It oly takes about 15 minutes per day to do the exercises, and pain is terrific motivator!

Yes, I think I can talk with her and decided to make weekly PT (we have about 20 sessions left). Now is the time for me to address this.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Mar 22, 2015 7:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

March 22, 2015: pretty simple. Eat only when hungry. Resist social pressure to do otherwise.

The Blessings of Simplicity: March 25, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Wednesday, March 25, 2015: 226.0
Day 2 – Thursday, March 26, 2015:
Day 3 – Friday, March 27, 2015: 227.2
Day 4 – Saturday, March 28, 2015:
Day 5 – Sunday, March 29, 2015:
Day 6 – Monday, March 30, 2015:
Day 7 – Tuesday, March 31, 2015:


Jounral
Day 1 – Wednesday, March 25, 2015: 226.0 Reality. I had my little pout about how this is not a search for some magic approach that will relieve me of work. I need to work on this, forming and following sustainable habits to eat less and exercise more.

What I am looking to do is to record what I eat, record what I weigh when I am home, and use a comparison between what I eat and what I weigh to figure out how much to eat. Yes, I know I rarely if ever eat due to hunger, so I won't feel as though I am starving all the time. I will track my hunger and satisfaction levels but do not need to fear going off and eating everything in sight just because I eat without hunger. I'll also do my strengthening exercises (a habit I actually have already developed for going on two years now) and will continue with using the pedometer to try to reach 10,000 steps per day (a habit in process of being formed).

This isn't St. Paul's fall off the horse conversion. This is more face reality -- there is no magic out there. There is hard work and commitment, day in and day out.

One thing I will take from religious tradition is this: two breaks per year, one between Christmas and New Year's and one the week after Easter, although I'll skip the week after Easter break just because I am just barely starting.

Day 3 – Friday, March 27, 2015: 227.2 I am leaving today for California for a week, and I am bringing the classic book "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie. Tom is in danger of losing his job, and my two bit jobs as a contractor could not come close to making up the difference. I am stressed. It is easy to see that I eat for emotional reasons. Sad. Sad. Sad. I now go to California to my see my parents, including my brilliant father who now cannot always remember his wife's name. Life is full of stress. I need to be able to handle it and not eat to mitigate the stress.

It occurred to me that my big concern about eating only when hungry is social. This morning, I thought I would allow myself to eat for hunger or for social reasons. That eliminates a whole lot of eating for other reasons.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Apr 05, 2015 1:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: April 1, 2015

Weight
Day 1 – Wednesday, April 1, 2015:
Day 2 – Thursday, April 2, 2015:
Day 3 – Friday, April 3, 2015:
Day 4 – Saturday, April 4, 2015: 224.0
Day 5 – Sunday, April 5, 2015:
Day 6 – Monday, April 6, 2015:
Day 7 – Tuesday, April 7, 2015:

Journal
Day 4 – Saturday, April 4, 2015: 224.0 I ended up eating whatever I wanted until Wednesday when we were at Disneyland for two days. I did not try to eat only when hungry when I was socializing with my family. At Disneyland the first day, I was not hungry until dinner. On the second day, I got hungry at 11 but then we did not eat until 3. The sky did not fall. I felt the first twinges of hunger at 11, but hunger comes and goes. By 3, I was fairly hungry and gobbled my meal. On Friday, we got to the airport early, and I had a latte and part of a scone because I was already hungry in the morning.

What is weird is that suddenly the food does not taste good. Normally, I am indiscriminate in my eating. I'll eat anything, and I'll eat fast. There is a saying, "Hunger is the best spice", and waiting for hunger has made me more particular.

This morning, I went out to breakfast with Tom and a few other people, and I ordered a veggie omlette. I ended up eating about 1/3 of it before I was satisfied. When I came home, we started working on the Easter baskets, and I ate a lot of candy. Then I was not interested in eating. I had no lunch and then passed on dinner until about 8 when I thought I was hungry enough to eat. I had some milk and part of a hamburger but it almost seemed disgusting even though objectively Tom had made a very good hamburger.

This is very surprising. I had expected much self-discipline to be required in order to never eat when hungry, but what I am finding is I don't want to eat.

I told Ellie I was following how she eats, and she said, "Be true to your stomach." Silly, but I have to hand it to her: she has an overweight sister and overweight parents, but she is slim.

I have debated over the years why I have so struggled with my weight. Physical? Emotional? Social? What is strange, on this Easter eve, is I think it might be spiritual. I did not trust my body to tell me what it needed. All four of my kids became plump before puberty, but two slimmed down afterwards. Why? Both Ellie and Tom eat when hungry and eat what they want. They trusted their bodies to tell them what they needed, and they trusted food would be available when it was needed.

Me? I think dieting taught me a fear of hungry so severe that I need to eat way before I am hungry, only now I am trying to change so that I am willing to become hungry, even happy when I become hungry because then I can eat.

Trust. That is what I need. I became hungry at 11 and did not eat until 3 but that was not a time of agony. Instead, there was mild, intermittent reminders -- hey, time to eat.. I think I can eat within four hours of experiencing mild hunger.

Day 5 – Sunday, April 5, 2015:
Day 6 – Monday, April 6, 2015:
Day 7 – Tuesday, April 7, 2015:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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jbgnos



Joined: 25 Mar 2015
Posts: 53

PostPosted: Sun Apr 05, 2015 2:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Be true to your stomach - I like it!

Let me tell you that for me, it was years of IGNORING my body's signals. I ate when I wan't hungry and denied my body food when it was, depending if I was on a restricitive bender, or a binging one.

it took me a very long time and a lot of trial and error and even more ATTENTION to finally figure out what real hunger is.

Funny, it now seems so obvious to me: it's in your stomach! Not your head, not your throat and I even mistook sore arms or abs from working out for hunger. Basically I ate at ANY negative physical feeling and I didn't eat when I was hungry, thinking that was how to lose weight.

Dear goodness did I have that all backwards. It takes time and determination to untangle, but it definitely will.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Apr 05, 2015 10:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

April 5, 2015 - Easter was a culinary disaster as far as losing weight was concerned, but I return to waiting for hunger effective immediately. This isn't a cross the Rubicon moment. I can start and stop often, but I think that the key is to develop an aversion to overeating while allowing celebratory eating. As I practice waiting for hunger, it will be easier and easier. I'm on the right path.

Thanks for your encouragement, jbgnos.

April 6, 2015 - Today did not go well, either. I decided not to weigh myself this morning because I would be too discouraged. This afternoon, I decided just to wait for hunger and not worry about what I did yesterday and today.
I did not have dinner.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Wed Apr 08, 2015 3:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,

Major holidays are always a challenge, but don't let that discourage you.

If I may make one personal observation: if I plan my meals ahead and have as much prepared in advance as possible, dinner goes much better. By that, I mean that our meal is healthy and quickly prepared, so that I don't eat several hundred calories as I make dinner because I'm so hungry.

By that way, has your oldest daughter been able to stick with NoS? I remember that she was quite successful a few years back.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Apr 08, 2015 10:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Eurobabe2,

Anne dropped No S but still is down some weight.

I weighed in at 225.0 this morning (4/8 ) and decided that I am not ready for waiting for hunger. I'm returning to those SET guidelines. Right now, I am watching House of Cards rather than eating.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 2:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah, I can relate to that. I watched The Game of Thrones to avoid eating. Also the Easter candy is gone there's no chocolate in the house. (Chocolate and I go way back)
.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 1:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

April 10 - I decided to eat only when hungry. Katie started a culinary arts class and wanted me to taste her whipped cream. When I refused, she said, "Food brings people together, and right now you're rejecting me." I told her I was rejecting the whipped cream.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Sat Apr 11, 2015 2:47 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kittson



Joined: 20 Mar 2015
Posts: 218

PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 11:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That was a great reply, it made me smile. Smile Keep up the good work Kathleen!
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 2:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: April 8, 2015


Kittson,

Have you ever had a conversation that you thought could be a turning point in your life? Maybe this one last night with Katie was a turning point.

Can Katie know I love her if I turn down eating her whipped cream? Maybe I really do need to wait for hunger every single time.

Last night, I was looking back at Amazon purchases to find a backpack I had ordered for Ellie from Amazon because it needs to be replaced. It was painful to see all the diet books I had ordered.

Seriously -- when does this stop? I'm 56 years old and can barely fit into size 18 relaxed.

Maybe I need to bite the bullet, accept the social awkwardness of not eating when not hungry, and be done with it.

Done with diets. Done with diet books. Done with guidelines for how I eat. Done with waiting for a meal instead of hunger. Done. Done. Done.


Weight
Day 3 – Friday, April 10, 2015:
Day 4 – Saturday, April 11, 2015:
Day 5 – Sunday, April 12, 2015: 223.6
Day 6 – Monday, April 13, 2015:
Day 7 – Tuesday, April 14, 2015:
Day 8 – Wednesday, April 15, 2015:
Day 9 – Thursday, April 16, 2015:
Day 10 – Friday, April 17, 2015:
Day 11 – Saturday, April 18, 2015:
Day 12 – Sunday, April 19, 2015:
Day 13 – Monday, April 20, 2015:
Day 14 – Tuesday, April 21, 2015:
Day 15 – Wednesday, April 22, 2015:
Day 16 – Thursday, April 23, 2015:
Day 17 – Friday, April 24, 2015:
Day 18 – Saturday, April 25, 2015:
Day 19 – Sunday, April 26, 2015:
Day 20 – Monday, April 27, 2015:
Day 21 – Tuesday, April 28, 2015:
Day 22 – Wednesday, April 29, 2015:
Day 23 – Thursday, April 30, 2015:

Journal
Day 4 – Saturday, April 11, 2015:
Katie pestered me today to try her whipping cream, and I did. Then came more: cheese and a doughnut and an apple etc. I am going back to SET guidelines.

Day 5 – Sunday, April 12, 2015: 223.6
I dropped using a pedometer to focus on eating only when hungry and now I know I am not ready for that. What is interesting is I think the goal should be to be hungry at mealtime. This highlights the usefulness of No S.

Day 6 – Monday, April 13, 2015:
Day 7 – Tuesday, April 14, 2015:
Day 8 – Wednesday, April 15, 2015:
Day 9 – Thursday, April 16, 2015:
Day 10 – Friday, April 17, 2015:
Day 11 – Saturday, April 18, 2015:
Day 12 – Sunday, April 19, 2015:
Day 13 – Monday, April 20, 2015:
Day 14 – Tuesday, April 21, 2015:
Day 15 – Wednesday, April 22, 2015:
Day 16 – Thursday, April 23, 2015:
Day 17 – Friday, April 24, 2015:
Day 18 – Saturday, April 25, 2015:
Day 19 – Sunday, April 26, 2015:
Day 20 – Monday, April 27, 2015:
Day 21 – Tuesday, April 28, 2015:
Day 22 – Wednesday, April 29, 2015:
Day 23 – Thursday, April 30, 2015:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Sun Apr 12, 2015 1:03 pm; edited 3 times in total
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Kittson



Joined: 20 Mar 2015
Posts: 218

PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 3:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I do believe Katie can know you love her without eating the food. But it's up to you how strict you want to be with the rules. Perhaps you can do a MOD where you will taste one bite from what she is making. You will have to decide what you are comfortable with. I think we associate food = love. I have loved food, but food has never loved me back. I love the people that give me food, but the food they give does not love me.

Would you be able to save what she is offering you to try later at a meal?

I feel the same way regarding Amazon purchases. When I look at my Kindle, 80% of the books are diet books. It makes me feel like I've wasted so much time. I could have spent that time making memories with my family, or if I wanted to read, at least read something that was entertaining. I think the entertainment of diet books was the fantasy of the body I was going to get from doing what they said to do. And how my life was going to change when I reach that certain "perfect weight."

Well I've yo-yo'd down to a very low weight before and I had never been more miserable in my life. I really had to hit some pretty low points psychologically to quit hating on myself and stop the diet madness.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2015 12:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: April 8, 2015


Weight
Day 3 – Friday, April 10, 2015:
Day 4 – Saturday, April 11, 2015:
Day 5 – Sunday, April 12, 2015: 223.6
Day 6 – Monday, April 13, 2015: 224.0
Day 7 – Tuesday, April 14, 2015: 224.0
Day 8 – Wednesday, April 15, 2015: 222.8
Day 9 – Thursday, April 16, 2015: 222.6
Day 10 – Friday, April 17, 2015: 223.4
Day 11 – Saturday, April 18, 2015:
Day 12 – Sunday, April 19, 2015: 224.8
Day 13 – Monday, April 20, 2015: 225.8
Day 14 – Tuesday, April 21, 2015: 224.6
Day 15 – Wednesday, April 22, 2015: 224.6
Day 16 – Thursday, April 23, 2015: 224.4
Day 17 – Friday, April 24, 2015: 223.8
Day 18 – Saturday, April 25, 2015:
Day 19 – Sunday, April 26, 2015:
Day 20 – Monday, April 27, 2015: 223.0
Day 21 – Tuesday, April 28, 2015: 222.8
Day 22 – Wednesday, April 29, 2015:222.6
Day 23 – Thursday, April 30, 2015:225.6


Journal
Day 3 – Friday, April 10, 2015:
Day 4 – Saturday, April 11, 2015:
Day 5 – Sunday, April 12, 2015: 223.6
Day 6 – Monday, April 13, 2015: 224.0
Do I dare return to No S? I remember reading somewhere a person's oberservation that those who use No S as an excuse to binge don't end up losing weight. That is self-evident but also points to a larger truth: No S is a way for a person to not respond to every thought of food by eating.

I am thinking now that maybe I could eat small meals and record when I get hungry as a way to manage how much I eat at meals.

More later... I have a 20 hour per week job for four weeks. I cannot work full time but this is manageable.

2:45 PM: Ah well, that did not last. I had a latte at 11 and now just had 1/2 peanut butter sandwich. Maybe I can just write down what I eat, with the goal of three meals per day with hunger experienced between each one.

No S has something to it: the idea that regularity in eating is a good thing. I am sick of binge behavior brought on by a fear of hunger.

Day 7 – Tuesday, April 14, 2015: 224.0
I have read that one of the closest correlations between a behavior and weight loss is recorfding what you eat, and I sure can see why. I had a Haagen Dazs bar and chips yesterday. Was i expecting to lose weight?

No, and I didn't. I hate the idea of starting and stopping diets, but bheavior needs to change and it is hard to sustain "I won't eat as much as I want" or "I won't eat what I want to eat." The diet that was most successful for me was the Novena Diet, when I had 1,000 calories per day for 9 days and then maintained a 5 pound weight loss for a month before doing anything else. Maybe I can modify that approach by just trying to eat only when hungry and recording what I eat for nine days. It helps not to weigh myself during that time. Tom is attending a conference this weekend starting on Saturday, so I am just going out solo for a few hours on Saturday night. This could be a good week to try this approach.

9 pm: Well, I got home at 3 and ate for the first time today, then did not eat again until about 1/2 hour ago. Not good.

Day 8 – Wednesday, April 15, 2015: 222.8
Am I surprised that my weight went down? Yes, I am. Maybe I should just fast until 3 for nine days: that is my new Novena Diet. I am reminded of what I learned in my medieval history class when in college: that almost universally, everyone except the very old, the very young, and the sick fasted until 3 (the hour of nones) on Wednesdays and Fridays all year long and then (I'm not sure if I remember this correctly) every day but Sundays during Lent.

We have been told that it is essential to eat breakfast and it is important to eat throughout the day. Is science less wise than religion? Maybe religion has a better handle on human nature.

Consistency is important for exercise, but maybe inconsistency is what is needed for keeping a healthy weight. My impression from personal experience is that weight can creep up. Maybe occasional fasts are the way to go.

My job is tedious and not very interesting, but it pays almost as much as I was making per hour last year and I can work only $20 hours per week. Tom told me he would change places with me in a second. I get to work, and I get to be home when the kids are home from school and have time to walk, make dinner, keep up the house, and actually talk with husband nad kids. Maybe I should stick with part time. It's just that part time is really difficult to find!

1L30 PM: I'm home. I was standing in for someone who took a sudden leave of absence, and she was supposed to return today. Does that mean I am done working? No idea. We are not dependent on my income, so it doesn't really matter. I do like to work, but there is so much to do at home that I really should not work.

Parenting is different when one parent stays home. Today, Katie goes to trap, and Ellie is working as a substitute for her. Both need rides. Ellie and Katie started earning income (and paying taxes) at age 14, Tommy and Anne at age 16. I think early work experience is a good way to hel pkids transition to adulthood. Do I make more at $46/hour than Ellie does at $7.25/hour? Yes. You bet. BUT -- in the long run, is it better that I be available to drive her to and from work? Yes. They need me home. I may stick with part time work until we are empty nesters.

Day 9 – Thursday, April 16, 2015: 222.6 I got up an hour later than usual because the girls have a late start for school, so my weight is probably not lower today. I'll record it anyway. Yesterday, I experimented with not following the SET guidelines because it was almost 4 by the time I had anything to eat. I also thought about not writing down what I eat. My conclusion from yesterday was I should experiment only with not writing down what I eat. It is important to follow those SET guidelines as a way to head off binge behavior.

I did feel some hunger yesterday, but not much. The problem with binge behavior comes from my experiencing hunger at all: I'm just not used to it, which is why I'm fat in the first place.

Day 10 – Friday, April 17, 2015: 223.4
Life is full of surprises! My part time contract was ended at 34.25 hours. The reason given was that the person who went on a leave of absence had returned, but I suspect I was let go because I just did not work on Web projects at the tail end when app badges and omnitures are being set up -- so I had no idea even what those words meant. I left in time to have lunch with my husband downtown, and so the fast ended at noon.

Tom and I went for a walk, and he was irriated with me: When is God going to get you to hear the message that you should not be working right now?

I love to work, but I thought part time was acceptable to him and apparently it is not. The girls need Mom around as a sounding board.

I decided just to write down what I eat and not worry about anything else food wise. There was one tip from the Gillian Riley book that I thought might helpl as well. She suggested planning what you eat and when you eat it. I am tangenting off that suggestion with something related -- and that is to decide when you are done for the moment. For example, I had banana bread for breakfast. That is something that would be easy to munch on all morning. Instead, I decided not to eat again until noon.

3 pm: The day has just dragged on and on. I like working and am bummed that that job did not work out. I think I need some basic goal setting and planning activities. I decided on a new motto: "Every bite is a choice." This counters the tendency to think I am subject to emotional, physical and social whims. No, I'm not.

Day 11 – Saturday, April 18, 2015:
I was able to schedule an hour with my personal trainer since she had a cancellation. We spent the entire time talking about weight management. One discussion we had was around whether you wanted to make a lifestyle change or a temporry change. I argued for a temporary change and told her about Katie shoving homemade whipped cream in my face. We cannot always anticipate when we will be offered something to eat.

We then discussed a food journal. I told her I could see some benefit in always keeping a food journal but then described what happens when I keep one. For example, yesterday I had banana bfread at breakfast and then continue to munch it off and on all day, since it was already written down. Maybe it was exposure to all this URL formatting that I've had in the past week, but it occurred to me I could just mark the end of eating for a meal or a snack as a "/". As I sat talking with Kayla, I did exactly that.

I have a tendency to just keep eating if I start. I just swiped some spice drops which Ellie is using for a homemade dessert, and then pretzel sticks, and then back to spice drops. To veer off from that munching, I wolfed down an entire grapefruit. Now I am typing and thinking I should write down what I have eaten thus far and then end the list with a "/". If I eat any more, I'll start a new line and write down what I eat. My hope is that this approach will make it more likely that the day's calories include 1/2 cup of spice drops rather than 2 cups of spice drops.

I'm also marking down hunger level at beginning and end for each time I eat, and so far all I have are dashes to indicate no sense of hunger and no sense of fullness. If I don't start eating when I am hungry, I will either stop eating in a nether world of no sensation or with a sense of being stuffed. At least I am not eating to being stuffed.

Finally, we discussed how often I should weigh myself. I said I tend to weigh myself daily and each weight is an opportunity to decide I should do something differently. As a result of our discussion of different options, I decided to put weight on my sheet for weekly tracking of food intake with the intent of recording weight only once per week.

It's nice to talk this out with someone in person. This board maybe gave me enough courage to be able to talk with someone in person. I've been going around and around in circles for many years, for most of my life, and it is such a waste.

Day 12 – Sunday, April 19, 2015: 224.8
One other thing that came up in my conversation yesterday was I said I am marking down if I am hungry, and I'm not. Kayla then asked why I am eating, and I said mostly out of fear of hunger. She asked why I was afraid of hunger, and I said I thought it was those 10 years of the Novena Diet.

Last night, I did not get home until about 9:30, I was not hungry, but I ate. Why? I asked myself. Why? I knew why: I was afraid that I would be hungry in the night.

Now, here is the reason why No S did not work for me. I pigged out at every meal out of fear that I would be hungry before it was mealtime.

This morning, I weighed myself because my motivation to not weigh myself was out of fear that I would eat to maintain current weight. I'm weighing myself. New motto was from John Paul II's first words after becoming pope: Be not afraid.

5 PM: What if I eliminated all options that involved start/stop dieting? What if I don't have another Day 1 but just continue on and on, building upon an approach of recording food eaten and weight every day? What if?

Would I give up telling myself that I can have that Haagen Dazs bar right now because tomorrow I won't eat until 3 pm or won't eat until I experience hunger?

Day 13 – Monday, April 20, 2015: 225.8
I blew it. I was going to wait until I was hungry but then decided to have breakfast and had more than breakfast. Now I'm thinking I should wait for hunger. For the few days I tried waiting for hunger, I found that I can start to get hungry and it is not a crises to get to food. One day, I felt hunger for the first time at 11 AM but did not eat until 3 PM.

6 PM: That stupid dog woke me up at 3 AM, and I could not go back to sleep. Despite having extra coffee, I finally went for a nap. When I woke up, I realized that I had only half the puzzle: I knew when to start eating but did not know when to stop eating. I knew to start eating when physical hungry, but I had to remembered that I used to stop eting when I no longer felt hunger.

For example, I feel fullness in my stomach. I overate. The goal is to feel nothing. Nothing.

I have been eating between full and stuffed and what I need to do is eat between hungry and not hungry.

It is very simple.

Day 14 – Tuesday, April 21, 2015: 224.6
Last night, I skipped dinner and then ate before going to bed. Why, I asked myself? It turns out I was afraid I would get hungry in the night. Pathetic. I woke up this morning, thinking I need to rate my level of fullness as well as hunger. I can feel food in my stomach so I will label this as 6 or more.

I am going to have neutral as 5. My goal is to start eating below 5 and end at 5. Today, as far as I can figure, I start at 6 (feeling less full) and end at 9 (stuffed). No wonder I'm so fat.


1 PM: I let myslef eat what I wanted this morning, and what did I find? Yes, I do eat from the time I sense my stomach starting to empty until I feel full. I can rate these experiences ass 6 (feel food in stomach) to 9 (feel stuffed). What I need to do is eat after experiencing hunger (rating of 2 for significant hunger to 4 for mild hunger) until I no longer feel hunger (rating of 5 as neutral).

There are several hours in there between a 2 and a 4. This should be an adjustment but at least I recognize what I need to do.

As quoted in Dale Carnegie's classic book on worry, Charles Kettering said, "A problem well-stated is a problem half-solved." I just stated the problem. The solution was easy to see. Now I need to implement.

Day 15 – Wednesday, April 22, 2015: 224.6
I ate nothing after 12 or 12:30 yesterday and weigh the same today as I did yesterday which indicates just how much I ate before I stopped. I may no longer wear my pedomoeter so I can just concentrate on eating between a 2 and a 5. First indication of hunger is a 4. I've got that down. Everything else is somewhat vague, but at least I have a direction.


I lasted until 1 without any experience of hunger and then had a free for all. Why? I think I may know why which is that I eat up to the level of fullness that I am accustomed to having if I don't wait for hunger.

I need to wait for hunger.

Day 16 – Thursday, April 23, 2015: 224.4
I just experienced a hunger growl, which is perfect timing because I am going out for coffee in a few minutes (9 AM). It's not really that hard to do this. What has been tripping me up is the assumption that I would be in pain from the moment I first experienced hunger until I ate. In fact, that is not true. When we were at Disneyland, I first experienced hunger at 11 and we did not get around to eating until about 3. By then, yes, I was hungry, but I would have been fine with eating 3 hours after first experiencing hunger.

Day 17 – Friday, April 24, 2015: 223.8
Yesterday, I had a wonderful 3 hour breakfast with another stay at home Mom: a small latte and French toast with syrup. After I got home, I ended up starting my past-wait-for-hunger binge and had a lot but not as much as earlier in the week. Then I had zero interest in food and went to bed. It is possible I have a mild case of the flu. I woke up about 1 AM and did not sleep well until about 4 AM.

I suspect part fo the reason for my not sleeping well is that I am at all used to sleeping on an empty stomach. What better time is there for me to make this adjustment than now? The two younger kids are in school, and the two older are in college. I am not working and will not work until fall. I need to plunge in. Moderation does not work here. I need to adjust suddenly to different perceptions of both hunger and fullness.

My brother lives in Hood River along the Columbia River in Oregon. It is lush there. If you drive 10 miles west along the Columbia River, the lushness turns into dessert and yet everything else seems the same: there is still the river, and there is still the rolling hills.

I don't know why there is the sudden change. I see my change in perception of hunger and fullness as somewhat similar to that change along the Columbia River in that there is just one thing that changes and everything else is the same. What changes for me is perception of hunger and fullness.

Am I hungry now at 7:30 in the morning even though I have not eaten since 2 yesterday afternoon? No, I am not. I now set the line between hunger and not hunger as the mild stomach growl, and I have not yet experienced it.

Day 20 – Monday, April 27, 2015: 223.0
We were at my mother in law's house over the weekend. They socialize with eating, and they are good cooks. I did not worry about dieting and was pleasantly surprised to weigh less this morning than I did on Friday. We did go for walks in the woods and so far have found two ticks on the dog and one wandering through my hair. They were all wood ticks so not carriers of Lyme's Disease.

I have set up in my mind a rating system for levels of hunger from one to ten with one being close to fainting and ten being too stuffed to move. I believe I have a handle on only two ratings:
4: the level when I experience a hunger growl (not a stomach noise but an indication of mild hunger)
9: stuffed which is my normal stopping point for eating.

My goal is to stop at 5, which is when hunger is satisfied, not at 9, which is when I am too stuffed to continue eating.

My goal for this week is to experience the level of 4 twice. I experienced it once last week (on Thursday morning), so experiencing it twice in a week is an improvement. I plan not to eat until I experience a 4 today, and then I think I'll wait until Thursday to have the goal of a 4 again.

9 PM: I lasted until 11 and then ate and then snacked all day. Then I felt lousy, really lousy, and slept through dinner. I am thinking that I cannot manage to go back and forth between former eating habits and eating to satify hunger. I need to choose.

Day 21 – Tuesday, April 28, 2015: 222.8
The purpose of eating is to satisfy hunger, but this culture has changed since I was a child: now you need to avoid hunger. You need to eat before you become hungry. No wonder so many of us are fat. Whatever happened to: "Don't eat before dinner because you'll spoil your appetite."?

3 PM: I munched without being hungry. Both Katie and Ellie were off school, and they made a dessert that their aunt had taught them how to make. Wha tnow? I am noticing something very encouraging, which is I am learning not to want to eat unless hungry. I don't feel great. I feel loaded down.

The interesting question for me has never been why I am fat. It has always been why I eat so much. I now have the answer. I was gullible and thought that hunger was a terrible thing and needed to be avoided, so I ate before getting hungry. That was not the case when I was young. I remember that the goal was to be hungry for dinner or we wouldn't eat. How times have changed.

7 PM: I am feeling something that is pleasant and is a stomach that is not full. I do not want to eat even though I did not have dinner.

Day 22 – Wednesday, April 29, 2015:222.6
I am now thinking of the analogy of hooking something or anchoring a boat. You have to throw and have the hook caught. That's how I feel now -- like I finally hooked something, like the idea of waiting for hunger finally makes sense. What makes no sense is to eat when not hungry. There is no satisfaction in it. Food tastes like cardboard. It is only if you wait until you are hungry to eat that you realize how true it is that hunger is the best spice.

Day 23 – Thursday, April 30, 2015: 225.6
I woke up this morning with my stomach growling. My personal trainer said that sometimes people feel very hungry the morning after they eat a lot. I evaluated that stomach growl and realized it was not a hunger growl. My stomach was just straining to digest food.

Then I debated about weighing myself because I thought the weight would be way up. I decided to face the music, and my weight was way up. Now what? I am still within a very tight weight range.

This leads me back to my Novena Diet. For niine days, I counted 1000 calories per day to get to a weight range that was five pounds lower and then held that weight for a month. I think I could do that with a difference: I would eat perfectly only if I am actually hungry. My goal is to spend nine days focused on eating when hungry, not on getting to a certain calorie level. This is not exactly a diet. It is more practicing perfectly what is appropriate all the time.

I won't weigh myself for the next nine days.

I think I could repeat this nine day focus once per month, which would result in a five pound weight loss per month. That's not bad. I'd love to be 60 pounds lighter next May.

11 AM: Stupid. I lasted two hours. I came across the book The Power of Habit and realized that eating according to hunger would disrupt any attempt at building habit because hunger comes and goes. It is better for me to have the commitment to eat if I should become hungry but adher to habits like writing down wha tI eat, writing down what I weigh, and eating at mealtimes.

I have been going back and forth wondering if you want a constant approach to weight loss or an on/off approach, and now I'm in the camp of building habits. No wonder so many people who lose weight write down what they eat. This is a habit that can be followed continuously no matter what -- no matter a daughter shoving whipped cream in your face.

Did I want to reject her first attempt at whipped cream? No. Did I want to celebrate that she did something of her own initiative? Yes.

One taste of whipped cream does not make a person fat.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Thu Apr 30, 2015 3:57 pm; edited 45 times in total
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2015 2:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
...I could eat small meals and record when I get hungry as a way to manage how much I eat at meals.
Hi, Kathleen-
Wow, that sounds like a great idea. And a good way to be true to your stomach, too! You can decide what time you will eat, but let your hunger level tell you whether to make it a full/heavier plate of food or a sparser/lighter one. I really hope that works out for you... it sounds like moderation meets stomach respect!
I try to do something similar when I am crossing time zones for work... eat at "normal" meal times, but let hunger dictate whether to make it a snack size or a full meal.
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Apr 15, 2015 6:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

osoniye,
The problem with this approach is I tend not to stop when I have started. I wonder if fasting istn' a good approach for me...
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kittson



Joined: 20 Mar 2015
Posts: 218

PostPosted: Wed Apr 15, 2015 7:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

osoniye pointed out a great idea you had!!

I have done 16/8 and Eat Stop Eat 24 hr fasts in the past, and they led me to huge binges, and I don't have any history of binging. We all react differently to them, but it's something to think about! Good luck with what you decide.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2015 12:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kittson,
I do see that as a danger. The SET guidelines are a way to keep binge behavior at bay.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2015 4:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
osoniye,
The problem with this approach is I tend not to stop when I have started. I wonder if fasting isn't a good approach for me...
Kathleen
Hi Kathleen,
Yeah, I hear ya... I've been tempted by the siren song of fasting before, but it quickly ends in disaster for me. I think my blood sugar gets out of whack, I don't lose weight and I get really cranky.
I am afraid for you that you will find it hard to get to a place of balance, if you go from one end of the spectrum in heavily listening to hunger (intuitive eating) and then go all the way to the other side and ignore hunger (fasting). It just seems like that would encourage the pendulum to keep swinging.
I can really imagine you listening to your hunger cues at meal time, and portioning out a plate that reflects and honors that (full/heavy or sparse/light) and then just pushing away from the table when you're finished with that, knowing that you will be able to listen to hunger/your stomach in the next few hours or the next morning and give yourself another healthy, moderate meal. Maybe you are right at that point in your journey when you're ready to do that-? But, I know, it doesn't matter what I can picture you doing, it matters what you picture yourself doing and what you think is the most healthy (both physically and mentally) at this point for you. I really hope that you can find a place of peace with food and balance in eating in a way that works really well for you.
_________________
-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2015 2:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sonya,
I think fasting could be a good way to limit eating in the context of a society with a universal commitment to fasting two weekly. My fasting ended at noon yeseterday when I had lunch with my husband.

I'm back to writing down what I eat. I'm also marking hunger level at start and end. Guess what? This morning, no hunger. That is usually the case. Maybe I won't be so afraid of not eating if I realize I'm rarely hungry.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



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Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2015 2:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: May 31, 2015

Health Summary
For each month, I track the percent of days that I walk 10,000 steps in one day, and I track the percent of days that I follow my version of No S Rules: no snacks, no sweets, and everything in front of me before I take one bite. The percent for the entire month is given except in May, 2015 when I started tracking No S rules compliance on May 12. I also give my weight on a particular day in that month.

Year 1, Month 1 – May 31, 2015: 222.8


Weight
Friday, May 1, 2015: 224.6
Saturday, May 2, 2015: 222.6
Sunday, May 3, 2015:
Monday, May 4, 2015: 224.2
Tuesday, May 5, 2015:
Wednesday, May 6, 2015:
Thursday, May 7, 2015:
Friday, May 8, 2015: 223.0
Saturday, May 9, 2015: 224.2
Sunday, May 10, 2015: 223.6
Monday, May 11, 2015: 224.0
Tuesday, May 12, 2015: 224.6
Wednesday, May 13, 2015: 222.6
Thursday, May 14, 2015: 223.4
Friday, May 15, 2015: 220.8
Saturday, May 16, 2015:
Sunday, May 17, 2015:
Monday, May 18, 2015: 221.8
Tuesday, May 19, 2015: 222.6

Wednesday, May 20, 2015: 223.0
Thursday, May 21, 2015: 223.6
Friday, May 22, 2015: 222.4

Saturday, May 23, 2015: 222.0
Sunday, May 24, 2015: 221.2
Monday, May 25, 2015:
Tuesday, May 26, 2015: 221.6
Wednesday, May 27, 2015:
Thursday, May 28, 2015:
Friday, May 29, 2015: 222.4
Saturday, May 30, 2015: 223.2
Sunday, May 31, 2015: 222.8


Journal
Friday, May 1, 2015: 224.6
I am going to have monthly goals with regard to weight and see where these goals take me. I'm not going to be starting and stopping. Everything I decide to do is something I can conceive of doing for the rest of my life, or at least until I get to be very old. Here are my goals:
1. Write down what I eat and gauge hunger and fullness levels.
2. Write down what I weigh if I am home.
3. Fast (coffee and water only) until dinnertime on Wednesdays and Fridays, if practical (exceptions include any social outing)
4. Walk an average of 10,000 steps per day for the month.
5. Do daily strengthening exercises.

I bought a book called The Art of Tidying Up since Tom is always after me to clean up. While I have never considered myself to be a hoarder, I certainly saw the description of myself as a stockpiler. She believes that overeating and having excess clothing are both attempts to relieve stress and that people who hang onto what "does not spark joy" do so for one of two reasons: an attachment for the past or a fear of the future.

It hurt reading this. It hurt. I must have 30 years worth of lightbulbs because I wanted to keep the incandescent bulbs in my house and not deal with mercury in lightbulbs. That is at least understnadable. What is not understandable is broken jewelry that I don't even like or one earring when the other is missing. I was appalled reading the part on stockpiling. Seriously, the last fish died over a year ago: why do we have all these fish supplies, including 8 fish bowls? And then there was makeup. Samples and samples and samples.

Simplicity is the watchword for my losing weight, and I think it also applies to discarding what does not spark joy. Last night, as I was eating, I asked myself if what I was eating sparked joy. No.

As I was working on getting rid of books, I cam across a book I enjoyed called The Power of Habit. I realized that, if you eat only when hungry, you cannot form habits because hunger comes and goes. What I need is to form habits.

Saturday, May 2, 2015: 222.6
It is good to have Kayla as a sounding board. She wholeheartedly agreed with me that it makes no sense to diet, that what you need to do is come up with habits that you can follow for life. I did try fasting but only lasted until 2 because I was getting distracted by hunger. That is OK. I walked 10,000 steps.

This morning, I got on the scale at 223.0, stepped off, and then got back on at 222.6. I thought that I need to buy and new scaled and then thought to myself, "Why?" I have been a slave to the scale, changing due to slight fluctuations in weight. Now I am not.

Instead, my assignment is to identify why I eat (a cue) and the come up with alternative behaviors. This is straight out of the book The Power of Haibt. In it, there is a pattern of behavior that is in three parts:
1. Cue: what triggers the behavior
2. Routine: what you do when the cue occurs
3. Reward: what you enjoy as a result of following the cues

The key to weight loss with this approach is to identify or reduce the cues to eat and, when they occur, change the behavior.

Yesterday, I was getting bored with studying and took a break. My break was to eat. Later, I got bored again and read from a magazine. My first identified cue is boredom.

Actually, that is my second identified reason for eating when not hungry. The first reason is "Last Supper eating", the label given by the authors of Intuitive Eating to eating which occurs after you decided to diet but before you actually started. I experienced Last Supper eating two days ago.

6 PM: I ate a ton today and think that most of the eating was due to "Last Supper Eating." More or less -- get it while you can. I'm going to focus this next week on eliminating that type of eating.

8 PM: I may step back from writing and just focus on eliminating Last Supper Eating. If I am telling myself "go for it when you have the chance", I will try not to eat. Why do I eat like this? I think it is from years of dieting when I ate every last calorie I was allowed. So sad.

Monday, May 4, 2015: 224.2
I am reminded of the saying, "The best is often the enemy of the good." I think I am being overly amibitious. If I just record what I eat and what I weigh, the learning will occur naturally. I'll realize -- hey, I just ate to take a break.... why not read a magazine or take the dog for a walk instead?

My goals, for the month are revised to:
1. Do strengthening exercises (now a habit)
2. Walk an average of 10,000 steps per day (inconsistent)
3. Record what I weigh and what I eat

That's enough.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015:
I did not weigh myself this morning. Yesterday was not a great day, but it came with an insight that follows from reading that book "the life-changing magic of tidying up". She recommends getting rid of stockpiles. I'm not going to do so, but I can certainly go through and get rid of what is not needed. On Sunday night after 9, Ellie came to me to ask if I had dividers for a notebook. Yep. I pulled down a set. Yesterday, I went through the bookshelf in my closet that is a stockpile for paper office supplies and binders. We have a lot. We have about 6" worth of loose leaf paper, 2" of graph paper, four binders, 10 notebook dividers, an inch worth of sheet protectors, 30 plastic report binders, and 10 notebooks. That's just the paper supplies. I have separate buckets for scotch tape, pencils, pens, calculators... We have a ton of storage space in the house, and I hve filled it with plastic buckets of supplies.

How does this habit of stockpiling relate to overeating? I may be overeating as a way to stockpile against a future famine. Diets were famines. There is something more, however. My income is inconsistent, and Tom needs to find a new job. We have four kids to support and retirement is in 10 years.

I thought this morning that I can go through the rest of my life doing counterproductive things like overeating and stockpiling, or I can trust we will have what we need. Actually, when I think of trust, I think of Jews walking into gas chambers praying the prayer of the dead. That is trust. Those people died. And yet there final act of living was one of trust. I imagine how they lived throughout their lives.

I am not currently walking into a gas chamber, and there is no indication of famine in the near future. Maybe I can trust enogh to eliminate any eating I could characterize as stockpiling. Yes, I spent years creating famines called diets. So what.. It was stupid. I am now going to focus on having regular, moderate meals.

Yes, it sounds like No S. I'm not going to worry about snacking. I'm just going to ask myself, before I eat, if this is stockpile eating and try not to eat if that is all it is.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015:
I did not weigh myself yesterday, although I ate less, and this morning I decided that I have a real advantage in knowing when I am hungry. Maybe I cna write down just what I eat when I am not hungry, since that is the problem.

10 PM: I have cleaned out an entire bookshelf of 7 shelves and have selected out only about 1/2 bookshelf of books to donate. There is no value to holding onto books I'll never again open.

Tonight, I decided just to build habits. I'm doing well with the 10,000 step per day habit, but I'm overstepping my abilities with food. I think I'm just going to take hand or utensil away from food while chewing and swallowing. It seems so minimal, but I need to build a habit.

Thursday, May 7, 2015:
The girls don't have school today or tomorrow so I slept in and cannot give an accuarte reading on my weight since I was up two hours later than usual. I think back to when I started personal training, and I could not do much. I could not even do a bridge without pain shooting up my calf. Maybe I need to accept that I am at the very beginning of losing weight effectively and realize it will be baby steps all the way.

Because I could not do a bridge, I started with lying onthe ground with knees bent and lifting one leg a few inches. When I showed Tom my exercise, he ws shocked.

Now I can do 10 heel taps with legs fully extended, meaning both legs are up in the air and you extend one leg at a time. I can do one legged bridges meaning I can do a bridge and lift a leg all the way up.

This took two years.

My baby step for weight loss, I think, is to take hand or utensil away from food while chewing and swallowing. This habit will directly counter the habit of binge eating: eating a lot quickly and without thought. I at least cannot eat quickly.

10 AM: The girls are home today and tomorrow, so I have to get to a good stopping place with de-cluttering. Ugh. I cannot believe the amount of junk I have. Decluttering does make you realize what is important to you, and also you can find it when you need it. Did we really need, between us, three copies of The Bridge to Terebinthia?

Day 1 – Friday, May 8, 2015: 223.0
I am quite happy with the weight of 223.0 this morning because it indicates I might be able to lose weight just following the rule of taking hands or untensils away from food while eating and swallowing. Last night at dinner, I did notice that I was becoming full partway through dinner. Normally, I eat so fast that I don't notice.

Somewhere I read that the most effective way to get rid of a bad habit is to develop a habit which is incompatible with that bad habit. Over the time that I have been recording what I eat, I realized that perhaps 50% or more of what I eat might be characterized as binge eating. If I can eliminate binge eating with one simple habit, how much might my caloric intake decrease? We shall see.

I also am back to walking an average of 10,000 steps per day and have walked more than that each of the past 7 days.

Simplicity seems to be my watchword: focus on a few things and do them well. My personal trainer had pointed out to me, when I brought up using the exercise bike, that it might work better for me just to walk than to try to add in the bike and fail at both biking and walking.

Maybe the problem with my losing weight is not that I am not trying hard enough. Instead, maybe the problem is that I am trying too hard. I am doing too many things and failing at all.

So -- I have the strengthening exercises, which are easy and amount to perhaps 5 minutes morning and night, I have the walking which can be built into my life almost effortlessly, and I now have the one eating rule that eliminates binge eating because it forces me to slow down in eating. Now I stay the course and see what happens.

I am going to restart my count because I think this combination of eating rules, walking, and strengthening exercises could be all I need. Sure, I'll work on improving cooking and adding to strengthening exercises, but in general I will try to stick with just three categories of habits (those listed above).

3:15 PM: I just snacked -- ice cream bar, cookies, milk... and I feel bloated to the point of pain. While I ate a lot, I did not eat as much as usual. Is it possible that how I eat affects how full I feel? There was a theory more than 100 years ago called Fletcherism in which, I believe, you chewed your food 28 times. This approach is uch simpler. I feel somewhat disgusted. It's not emotional disgust because I am almost emotional detached as I observe my behavior and feelings. Instead, I have the feeling of physical disgust: I ate too much!

Day 2 – Saturday, May 9, 2015: 224.2
My weight went up today, which was not surprising because of how much I ate. The surprise is I did not enjoy it. Now I just had a sandwich for lunch. There are Haagen Dazs bars in the freezer. Am I going to have one? No. It somewhat turns my stomach to consider eating one. The unpleasantness from overeating yesterday made an impression on me.

Day 3 – Sunday, May 10, 2015: 223.6
I wavered this morning before I got out of bed, thinking maybe I would focus on recording what I eat, because I did not follow my one guideline perfectly. Then I weighed myself and thought I should stick with this and see what happens. Writing down what you eat for life would be a real pain, but eating one bite at a time could become an ingrained habit.

Day 1 – Friday, May 8, 2015: 223.0
Day 2 – Saturday, May 9, 2015: 224.2
Day 3 – Sunday, May 10, 2015: 223.6

Day 1 – Monday, May 11, 2015: 224.0
I am just never again going to eat except when hungry. Period. If Katie shoves whipped cream in my face, too bad. It is not selfishness to refuse.

Day 2 – Tuesday, May 12, 2015: 224.6
I read somewhere that you can sometimes apply lessons of success from one area of your life to another. That got me to thinking about my up and down experience with walking 10,000 steps per day. I was tracking a rolling average but this month just started writing down my steps. On Mother's Day, I fell short, but that was the only day this month that I was below 10,000 steps. Good enough. I don't have to be perfect.

How does this relate to eating? Maybe I need to live in day-tight compartments, a concept promoted by Dale Carnegie in his book How to Win Friends and Influence People. Now I'll borrow the idea of No S. Maybe I can track no snacks, sweets, or seconds on a daily basis. That is my goal, and I do not expect to reach it every day just like I do not expect to walk 10,000 steps per day.

Yesterday I did not eat until 2 pm and then ate a lot, in fits and starts, right up until 10 pm. That is not a good way to live. Regular meals make more sense.

7:30 AM: I wrote the above at about 2 am because I could not sleep. The reason why I have stayed on the No S Diet site rather than move to another one is that, in the back of my mind, I saw wisdom in this approach. Yes, you need to satisfy hunger, but you also live in a world with other people and with schedules. It seemed to me ideal to be hungry for meals, but how do you do that?

My son had three finals yesterday, and tomorrow I get to drive him home from college. Maybe it is the thought of his grades that made me think in terms of grades. Who, other than my oldest, strives for 100% in their classes? No, people strive for As.

An A is not 100%. An A is 90% or above. Maybe I can apply that concept to both walking and following No S. The goal is to walk 10,000 steps or more on 90% of days. The goal is to follow my modified version of No S (everything before me before I take one bite) on 90% of days.

For breakfast, I had a hard-boiled egg, an apple, and a glass of milk. I laid everything out and ate the apple first without having to put it on the plate next to me.

Was I hungry? No. I did not eat until 2 pm yesterday and never got hungry. It is too jarring of an experience to move to eating only when hungry. The approach is more compassionate for me. It gives me flexibility but also a goal.

1 pm: I lasted until 15 minutes ago and then wolfed down a meal of lentil soup, walnuts, cheese with crackers and milk. I had a very preliminary experience of hunger. This will be hard at first but get easier. I want an A!

9:30 pm: I feel great right now, having taken the dog out with a flashlight to get to 10,000 steps. I also followed my version of the No S rules. 100 % success for today! What is great about this approach is I focus on the successes and they are time boxed to each day. I can feel 100% successful on a day like today. If I am not successful on any one day, I can know my real goal is 90% for the month. The focus is on success, not failure, which really makes me happy and motivated.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015: 222.6
This approach is simple, it is process-oriented, and it does not require perfection. It also focuses on the positive.

Time will tell if this will work.

8 am: I am going to try to spend as little time as possible thinking about this approach and just do it. Pefection was attractive because you don't think about it. You don't think about brushing your teeth in the morning. This approach is a little more bother because you track a rate of compliance. There isn't much effort, however. I have one page set up in my planner with two calendars on it. One calendar will track steps per day, and the other calendar will track weight.

Thursday, May 14, 2015: 223.4
Yesterday, I fell short on both goals. I got to 8,100 steps, which was understandable because I also drove over 600 miles to get Tommy from college. He had "packed". It took us a few hours to get out of his room because I also had to run to Walmart to get cleaning supplies, especially since we would have been charged for black marks on his wall from the futon. I considered stopping on the way home to walk around a Walmart, but Tommy didn't like that idea. That is OK that I didn't get to 10,000 steps. I need to be OK with their being days like that. If I have a daily goal and fall short, there may be good reasons for it. To try every day is good. After all, I did get to 8,000 steps despite being in the van for 10 hours and scrubbing a wall for at least 1/2 hour.

As for food, I did great except for taking a taste test at a mall. I could have refused -- easily. In future, I will.

At 7:30, I weighed 222.2. I think my weight will go down doing this because it creates habits.

8 pm: I am tired from getting home late and only got to 5,000 steps because Tommy did not get up until late so he didn't unpack the car so I couldn't go anywhere and it was raining out. Now I'm hungry. Rather than fight temptation, I am going to sleep. My priority has to be following the eating rules.


Friday, May 15, 2015: 220.8
Finally: some sense of progress! I may back off on the walking until I get to 90% success on the eating, however. It is an adjustment to eat only at mealtime. I eat what I want, but I do feel the constant drive to eat and now have to resist it. We go camping this weekend. That should energize me. I love to be outdoors.

Sunday, May 17, 2015:
We got back from camping, and then I had to go garden. I was so exhausted I went to bed and told Tom I did not want dinner. Everyone else is at church. I guess Tom figured not to wake me for church if I was too tired to eat.

I instantly got very tired with this approach, so I think I'm going to modify it to aim for losing five pounds per month. That should prevent, or at least minimize, issues with loose skin as a result of weight loss.

Monday, May 18, 2015: 221.8
I am concerned this morning about my energy level. As soon as I tried cutting back on eating, my steps per day dropped. Of course, I also had the long drive back and forth to ND and the fact that it was raining when I could not drive to the gym because Tommy had not yet unpacked the car. Still, over the weekend, it hit me again. My step count was 21,468 on Saturday because of camping, but I collapsed yesterday at 4,139 steps. I concluded yesterday that this approach has potential but maybe I cannot dive in. Maybe I need to follow it and take breaks. I think I am going to try to get below 220 this month with a buffer of one additional pound for fluctuating back up. That makes 219 as my goal weight. It would be best, I think, if I had a 5 pound buffer, but I can work up to that over months of time.

I also think it might be good to record when I do not follow my No S guidelines.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015: 222.6
I followed the guidelines yesterday, and my weight went up! Talking with Kayla helps me to sort out what I think, and one thing I brought up is that people who lost weight and maintained the loss tended to weigh themselves frequently and then do something differently when their weight crept up. I am thinking that I will use that approach for weight loss. It is now May 19, and I want to weigh in the 215 - under 220 weight range for the month of June. My goal is to get below 220 by June 1 and stay there through the month of June.

What should I do to get there? Well, I can write down what I eat. I can avoid snacks, sweets, and seconds.

Wednesday, May 20, 2015: 223.0
I am so done with worrying about my weight. This morning, I woke up and thought about the medieval practice of fasting. Maybe it is not such a terrible idea. Maybe it is a way for people to recognize when they are hungry. People fasted on Wednesdays and Fridays until 3 pm. Of course, on Friday, I am scheduled to attend Katie's Culinary Arts class to sample her food, but that is OK. I can do my best. I am just going to focus on walking and strengthening exercises and weigh myself once per month.

Thursday, May 21, 2015: 223.6
I spent an entire hour with my personal trainer yesterday. One exercise she had given me was causing back pain, and it turned out I was doing it wrong. I spent about 1/2 my time talking with her about food. She was pressing me to know what I would be willing to do for the rest of my life. I said fasting, but then I went home and ate. Today, I donated abotu 40 cookbooks I had collected over the course of the past few years. Why? The time I spent with her was more valuable than all those cookbooks. She was recommending I settle on a few standard foods. We covered breakfast yesterday: eggs, muesli, fruit, granola, sausage, bacon, yogurt, oatmeal... It's a good approach. For years, my standard was processed cereal.

This afternoon, I thought that writing down what I eat could be helpful for me in evaluating habits. I have been reluctant to do that because of concern about self-restriction and portion control. Well, maybe I shouldn't be. Maybe I should just commit to writing down what I eat and let the lessons come forth naturally.

Friday, May 22, 2015: 222.4
I tend to think in analogies, and sometimes the analogies are fairly bizarre. This morning, I awoke thinking of this story about the famous intellectual St. Thomas Aquinas:
"On the feast of St. Nicholas [in 1273, Aquinas] was celebrating Mass when he received a revelation that so affected him that he wrote and dictated no more, leaving his great work the Summa Theologiae unfinished. To Brother Reginald’s (his secretary and friend) expostulations he replied, "The end of my labors has come. All that I have written appears to be as so much straw after the things that have been revealed to me." When later asked by Reginald to return to writing, Aquinas said, "I can write no more. I have seen things that make my writings like straw."

To compare my weight loss blog to St. Thomas Aquinas' writings is most definitely not what I am doing. What I am doing is assessing what I have written as straw: it does not matter at all.

How do I manage money when I am serious about it? I record what I buy. It is very unpredictable to plan ahead for purchases. Yesterday I spent $400 in 15 minutes. That is the deductible on our health plan, and the pediatrician recommended Anne get an ultrasound to help with diagnosing stomach problems she has been having. Health costs are so absurd. Our youngest fell out of a tree and had a broken arm that required a cast: total cost to us was $500 but total insurance cost was $5,000. How do you plan for something like that?

As for planning for eating, there are also unpredictable things that come up. I'm attending a Culinary Arts class finale this morning. Who knows what I'll be fed? Do I pass on pork chops at 9 am because it doesn't fit my meal plan? No...

There is something inherently selfish and inflexible about being rigid in eating, just like there is something impractical about planning ahead for every expenditure.

I think the real commitment is to decide with purpose even if you cannot plan ahead. That is where recording what I eat, just like recording what I buy, comes in handy for making visible the decisions that sometimes are made without planning.

I've spent so much time and effort trying so many different things, and here I am obese with fat hanging in rolls off my stomach.

Pathetic. Now what I'll do is record what I eat and weigh and allow the knowledge gained from that to guide me in making changes.

Saturday, May 23, 2015: 222.0
Last night, I donated to the local thrift store a brand new Coach bag I had talked my husband into buying. It was a "good deal", or so I thought, but it turned out to be impractically heavy. I was never going to use it, and it had already cluttered up my closet for two years. Two other leather purses went with it.

Now I see the association between hoarding and overeating. I have been hanging on to things I don't need just like I have eaten what I did not need. I literally felt sick last night. Why didn't I sell the Coach bag on craigslist? Too painful.

I am going to eat only when hungry, starting today, and face the social consequences of not eating when socially expected because the consequences are far, far lower than spending the rest of my life obese.

Besides, hunger comes in waves and builds gradually, like the tide coming in. It's not as if I have to eat right now when I first experience hunger. That is a myth. Our culture has lost an understanding of how the human body works when there is a big focus on hunger as being a terrible, terrible thing, which is something I once heard someone say on the radio. Lucky for me, I can reach back to childhood to remember what it was like to allow hunger to build so that it could be satisfied at a meal.

1:19 PM: I already messed up and ate when not hungry but think what I should do is change my attitude from one of "I messed up" to one of "I am learning". I can learn by recording what I eat and weigh. I'm back to doing that and just doing that, along with exercise.

Sunday, May 24, 2015: 221.2
We are all individuals with tastes, circumstances, and personality traits that change over time. I wish I had figured that out earlier. We cannot shoehorn someone else's successful diet into our own lives and expect success. It may happen, but it is unlikely to happen.

Example: Yesterday, I just wanted to eat. Cheesecake or carrots -- it just did not matter. Why I wanted to eat I do not know. Maybe it was stress relief because, on Friday, Tom learned he had survived the politics at work to keep his job. What did I eat? Carrots. Lots of carrots.

I still have a Day Timer and have added a page designed to record what I eat in a week. I am adding, at the bottom, a place to note a lesson learned for the week. My lesson learned from just yesterday is to have something like carrots available for when I just want to eat.

The only knowledge I need in order to choose carrots over cheesecake is that carrots are better for you and lower in calories than cheesecake. I don't think I need a calorie counter book for that!

Monday, May 25, 2015:
Tuesday, May 26, 2015: 221.6
I think I'm going to just try to eat only when hungry and let everything else go. It's painful, very painful, but I am letting go of a lot of stuff. How did I get to the point where I have a separate bucket for scotch tape -- and have it filled with 31 tapes? I overstock like I overeat. I can hang on to the tape and the lightbulbs and the pencils and the pens, but there are other things that are going: books I'll never read, clothes I'll never wear...

Like with eating, you appreciate what you really want when you give up what you don't really want. Suddenly, what you like becomes visible. Where was my copy of Kristin Lavransdatter? Buried. That is my favorite book.

4:15 PM: This never works for long. I am going to record what I eat outside the. Lunes of no snacks, sweets or seconds, defining seconds as anything not before me when I take the first bite. This will build the habit of eating at mealtime while allowing for flexibility.

Wednesday, May 27, 2015:
I am just going to work on limiting snacking and how I am going to do it is by recording what I eat outside of mealtime and why.

Thursday, May 28, 2015: 223.0
I have a need for perfection when it comes to eating. Why? I don't stop using the pedometer if I fail to walk 10,000 steps in any one day. I don't stop doing those strengthening exercises if I forget one exercise and don't realize it. In little am I 100% anything. So now what? Do I try to change to having eating guidelines, or do I look at what I can do 100% of the time?

There is little I can do 100% of the time. The only thing that I think I could do is chew and swallow each bite before preparing the next one. That would slow my eating. I eat fast. Most obese people eat fast. Is overeating a cause or an effect of obesity, or is it a simple correlation? I think it might be a correlation and not a cause, but let me test it.

My next appointment with my personal trainer is next Wednesday. I can try this until then.

8:44 am: I got this idea from the book The 7 Habits of Slim People which got decluttered from my house. Along with attempting 100% compliance with this goal, I am giving up my iPad. Ellie wants to try it out before buying it, and I think it is a big timesink for me. On the computer, I tend to do useful things and timesink things. The iPad is almost entirely timesink activities: really, yesterday I saw a cute video of a dog getting a stick across a bridge and noticed that in four days there wer 3.3 million views. I'm rereading the 1978 book Four Arguments for the Elimination of Television. There is something not good about lots of screen time.

5:15 pm: I have circled back to the SET Diet:
1. Sit down, if possible.
2. Eat without distraction, if possible.
3. Take hands or fork away from food while chewing and swallowing.

Friday, May 29, 2015:
Saturday, May 30, 2015: 223.2

I decided to follow the exercises from The 7 Secrets of Slim People. Having purchased and discarded the book a few times, I needed to go on Amazon and order it again. I did create my own versions of the exercises which I found on our old computer and printed out, so I am set to start this morning.

Last night, I was rereading a book I had purchased as a joke from the library book sale on arguments against television, and in there was a paragraph on how medical experts may be doing more harm than good because people start to rely on experts and not listen to their own body. I prefer both medical experts and listening to my own body, not one or the other. For weight loss, however, I think it is more listen to your own body.

It would be nice to settle on something -- anything. I have been on a circuit of diets.


Sunday, May 31, 2015: I am done. Done. Done. Done. I am going to eat only when physically hungry. That is it. That is the commitment. Dramatic change can be helpful and sometimes easier. I've tried for a long time now to cut down on the amount of time I spend on the iPad. The iPad and the laptop are not equivalent as time wasters. With the iPad, it is easy to lie on the bed and surf. With the computer, you need to be more intentional. I have failed to cut down on iPad time, so I had Ellie reformat it and take it. There is nothing inherently wrong with using an iPad, but there sure was something wrong with how I used it. With eating, it's the same way. I cannot seem to handle eating when not physically hungry, so I need to face it, accept it, and give it up.

Giving up the iPad can be relatively easy when you allow someone else to change the password so you cannot access it on a whim. Food will not be locked up. That's OK. I have to adjust. Both Tom and I have alcoholism in the family from two generations back (Tom's grandfather, three uncles of my father) so I've been interested in alcoholism because my father's three uncles sure made an impression on him. Maybe I have the equivalent of alcoholism when it comes to food: one drink is too many and a million is too few. Maybe I simply cannot take one bite unless physically hungry. This will be an adjustment, and I cannot think of a better time than now to adjust. Older kids. No plan to work until fall. Now is the time.

4:17 pm: Perfection doesn't work. I am going to follow the exercises in The 7 Secrets of Slim People to train myself to become an intuitive eater.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Jun 01, 2015 3:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: June 23, 2015

Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0

Weight
Day 1 – Monday, June 1, 2015: 223.8
Day 2 – Tuesday, June 2, 2015: 223.6
Day 3 – Wednesday, June 3, 2015: 222.4
Day 1 – Thursday, June 4, 2015: 223.0
Day 2 – Friday, June 5, 2015: 222.0

Day 1 – Saturday, June 6, 2015: 222.8

Day 1 – Sunday, June 7, 2015: 222.0

Day 1 – Monday, June 8, 2015: 222.0
Day 2 – Tuesday, June 9, 2015: 222.2
Day 3 – Wednesday, June 10, 2015: 221.8
Day 4 – Thursday, June 11, 2015: 221.8
Day 5 – Friday, June 12, 2015: 221.6
Day 6 – Saturday, June 13, 2015:

Sunday, June 14, 2015: 223.6
Monday, June 15, 2015: 222.4
Tuesday, June 16, 2015: 222.0
Wednesday, June 17, 2015: 221.0
Thursday, June 18, 2015:
Friday, June 19, 2015:

Saturday, June 20, 2015: 221.8
Sunday, June 21, 2015: 221.2
Monday, June 22, 2015: 221.2

Tuesday, June 23, 2015: 222.0
Wednesday, June 24, 2015: 221.4
Thursday, June 25, 2015: 220.6
Friday, June 26, 2015: 221.2
Saturday, June 27, 2015: 220.8
Sunday, June 28, 2015: 221.0
Monday, June 29, 2015: 221.8
Tuesday, June 30, 2015: 220.6

Journal
Day 1 – Monday, June 1, 2015: 223.8
I am following three guidelines from the book The 7 Secrets of Slim People:
1. If possible, eat while sitting.
2. If possible, eat without distraction (no radio, driving, etc.) other than talking with others.
3. Take hand or utensil away from food while chewing and swallowing.

Day 3 – Wednesday, June 3, 2015: 222.4
I am meeting for an hour with my personal trainer today. I've worked with her for two years to build core strength, starting with a core that was so weak she literally had me lie down on the floor and lift one leg a couple of inches. She has worked with me to get my number of steps per day from about 3,000 to about 10,000. Now we are working on weight loss and nutrition.

She asked me a critical question last month: What are you willing to do for the rest of your life? She has persisted, over and over, in telling me that I cannot be going on and off diets, that I need to create habits for a lifetime just like I have the habit of doing strengthening exercises and am on my way to a habit of consistently walking 10,000 steps per day.

Today, I'm going to tell her that I'm willing to follow The SET Diet and to work on having unprocessed foods in our house.

I'm focusing specifically on lunches today. For this past academic year, Katie spent $550 and Ellie spent $375 on school lunches. I haven't paid much attention but last night went and looked at what they actually bought, and they bought an awful lot of cookies and pizza. There's an occasional salad in there. Like other kids, they complain about the deterioration in the taste of food since the new food rules got put in with Michelle Obama. I suspect the food rules made it more likely, not less, that kids eat processed foods, since the food rules target a balance of carbs, protein, and fat. The whole fruit is of such poor quality that the kids take it as required but then just throw it out. I don't want to be Michelle Obama at home for them, so I need to find a way to get tasty food that is not processed into our home.

It's not just about weight. It's also about food quality.

I did notice following the SET guidelines yesterday that it got somewhat boring to eat. I tend to pair eating with other activities, particularly reading and listening to the radio. Now I sit and eat. It take time to eat if I have to put my fork down between bites. Silly as it may sound, this approach may work for me. If I have to choose between reading and another activity, there are times I'll choose the other activity which should reduce my calorie intake.

Day 1 – Thursday, June 4, 2015: 223.0
I realized that I overeat as a way of stockpiling and the way for me to not eat so much is to tell myself that overeating is a waste of money.

2:30 pm: On a whim, I bought milk from Target that was from grass fed cows. It brought back memories of grade school. I could not believe how good it was, and I did not feel that hungry after having it.

Day 2 – Friday, June 5, 2015: 222.0
Kayla and I met two days ago to discuss diet. She was as frustrated as I was that I do not stick with anything. Last year, she told me that she was the only client with whom she worked whom she saw once per month who actually stuck with the exercises. I am very faithful in doing the strengthening exercises because they are built into my routine. It is now my focus to build good eating habits into my routine. The days of dieting are over.

Kayla does disagree with me in my approach. She is a believer in writing down what you eat, measuring out portions, and controlling portions. I told her I'd rather be fat. I told her that The SET Guidelines are not nothing. At least I am willing to commit to something. I told her I want to stick with these for at least a month and follow a philosophy from a book that I donated and now need to reorder. It is a book by Robert Lustig. I told Kayla that my focus will be on unproccessed foods with less sugar. Kalya then said I need to watch that sugar is in maple syrup and honey, and I told her yes, I agree, but what I am doing is moving the family from goodies like Oreo cookies to homemade Toll House cookies. As the saying goes, Rome wasn't built in a day.

My goal for the summer is to create healthy lunches that the girls can then have for school. Kayla sent me two links, and I'll be looking at those.

As for my weight, I am not going to worry about it for the moment. My measure of success is going to be whether I am below 220 by the end of the month. A two pound weight loss in a month may see minor, but I looked back in my blog and don't see a record of a weight below 220 since September, 2013.

Day 3 – Saturday, June 6, 2015:
Last night, I was reading a book on parenting teens, and I came across the word "autonomy". The goal of the teen years is to allow the child to establish autonomy. One recommendation is to suggest a child think for himself. This morning, I considered how much I had allowed my food choices to not be autonomous decisions by me. We went out to breakfast with two other couples, I ordered oatmeal, and I had about three bites because I wasn't hungry. No one noticed. One person only had coffee, and people noticed. Maybe I can follow the approach of having a very little if I am not hungry. It's time to tune in to my body. Ellie is right: "Be true to your stomach."

The SET Guidelines are yet another distraction. I need to focus on sensations of hunger, fullness, and satisfaction.


Day 1 – Sunday, June 7, 2015: 222.0
I am back to pure Intuitive Eating. I can identify physical hunger, and now all I need to do is claim autonomy and not eat when not physically hungry. People don't care. Why is it such a big deal to me what people think of what I eat? I do know that answer, and it is how my father treated me in my teen years. Sad. He meant well.

Day 1 – Monday, June 8, 2015: 222.0
I got up at 8 instead of 5:30, which is why my weight is still 222.0. Kayla and I argued back and forth last week. I respect her and she has helped me a lot but she would be classified as a restrictive eater. She measures everything out. She allows herself a certain number of calories per meal. Ick.

That is one approach. Another approach is the intuitive eating approach. It can work. It is just socially obtuse. You eat with others only if you are hungry.

Those are the two ways I see that following a constant eating approach will allow you to lose weight and maintain it. There are naturally thin people like my 14 year old, but the rest of us need a philosophy and an approach.

I am thinking now an on-off rather than a constant approach is the way to go if people tend towards a weight and then tend to add weight over time. You need a way to pull that weight down which requires some effort but not much.

Yes, No S is an on - off approach. I got down to 195 and then could not get lower even though I followed it for nine months.

What I need is an on off approach where I follow the on approach until I hit a goal weight and then maintain it for a time.

I'm going to try intermittent fasting at least until Friday. I can fast until 6 pm and allow myself to eat until 8 pm on each of those days. There is little risk of overeating to compensate this weekend as we will be camping, and I'll constantly be with my family.

I will give Kayla credit for one thing, however: she is a normal weight and obsessed whereas I am obese and obsessed. Last week, I told her I'd rather be fat than record everything I eat. I've made that choice. I do not want to make another appointment with her until I am at least below 220. There is a point at which embarrassment kicks in. It's much easier to take negative feedback online. I've advanced to being willing to put myself on the line with a human being who has gotten to know me some over the past couple of years.

3:30 PM: I decided to fast until 3 PM each day. In the last half hour, I have eaten a lot, but I think I may eat less over the course of the day than I would have had I started eating at breakfast. One thing I told Kayla is that I can fast easily but often have trouble stopping eating once I have started. Tomorrow's weight won't mean much because I weighed myself so late, but I should see some weight loss by Friday. If not, I may toss this idea in the dust bin, too.

Day 2 – Tuesday, June 9, 2015: 222.2
I weighed myself yesterday at 8 am and today at 5:45 am. I bet my weight is actually lower today than yesterday. In other words, had I slept until 8, my weight would have been less than 222.0.

Yesterday, I did not restrict calorie intake at all. I did not follow the SET guidelines. All I did was wait until 3 pm and stop eating by 8 pm. It was surprising how bad I felt after scarfing down food between 3 and 3:30. I'm not quite sure what I ate, but it was a lot.

What did I learn? My body cannot handle a large swing in food eaten. A fast makes it so you don't want to or can't eat as much.

I cut and pasted here from the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of the United States: "Fasting is abstinence from food. By detaching us from earthly goods and realities, fasting has a liberating effect on us and makes us worthy of the life of the spirit, a life similar to that of angels. Second, fasting, as abstinence from bad habits and sin, is the mother of Christian virtues, the mother of sound and wholesome thinking; it allows us to establish the proper priority between the material and spiritual, giving priority to the spiritual."

My goal is not spiritual; it is weight loss. The experience of fasting, however, is that you feel somewhat rested and liberated. I have been surprised in the past by this, but I never stuck to fasting. I believe that, for me, it may be necessary to fast several days in a row. The fact that Greek Orthodox do this every Lent gives me the assurance that I am not harming my body by fasting.

Day 3 – Wednesday, June 10, 2015: 221.8
I tried fasting until only 12:30 and immediately regretted it. I think I should try fasting until 3 pm.

I think my faith has some solid understanding of the human condition but some of that understanding has been abandoned. Universally, Christians fasted on Wednesdays and Fridays until 3 pm for about a thousand years! Today, Greek Orthodox have a great fast that is during all of Lent. We Catholics just don't eat meat on Fridays and fast on two days, Good Friday and Ash Wednesday.

I think what I am going to do is combine fasting with the Novena Diet, my self-created plan to lose weight by eating no more than 1,000 calories per day for nine days and then maintaining the lower weight for a month before repeating.

What I am going to try is, each month, fasting every weekday until 3 pm until I lose five pounds and then waiting for the start of the next month to repeat. This should work for at least a few months.

Day 4 – Thursday, June 11, 2015: 221.8
One result of my talk with Kayla last week was that I realized I wanted to work on having unprocessed foods in the house. I had read a book by Robert Lustig called Fat Chance. Sadly, that book was part of my decluttering effort, so I purchased another copy off Amazon. I got it yesterday and was able to read some. I got up at 2:30 in the morning and read some more. I corroborated two things I had thought:
1. Fat people are gullible: I took to hear the idea that "Fat makes you fat." I went to skim milk and all sorts of other low-fat foods.
2. How fast you eat matters. The doctor recommends waiting 20 minutes before having seconds. I think following those SET guidelines might be better.

As for fasting, yesterday did not work out too well. I had ot have Katie at trap at 3, so I brought along a slice of banana bread. The next thing I ate was at 5:30 and by then I was starving. I wolfed down a lot of food.

I'm going to follow the philosophy of this Lustig as best I can. I'm gullible still, perhaps.

Day 5 – Friday, June 12, 2015: 221.6
I have been trying to find something successful in my life that I can leverage so that I can be successful with weight loss, and obvious choices would be in the same category of health goals, so I have been looking at how I have managed with walking and strengthening exercises. It occurred to me yesterday that I might want to look at what I do with managing money. I write down what I spend. There are times you cannot account for charges, and that is OK because you know these things will come up. I don't budget. I just err on the side of spending less. Maybe I can write down what I eat and err on the side of eating less.

Sunday, June 14, 2015: 223.6
The problem with writing down what I eat is it seems to give me license to eat whatever I want. I told Kayla I would focus on what I'm willing to do for the rest of my life. It old her "It's not nothing." Last night, I ate a ton, and why? I don't know, but I do know that slowing the eating down would have resulted in less food being eaten. I'm back to my solid routine of walking and strengthening exercises, and now all I am going to add are those three eating habits from the SET Guidelines.

Monday, June 15, 2015: 222.4
I was moving towards following one person for weight management until I heard a talk on Youtube. He more or less said there is no such thing as free will, only chemical reactions. He was asked about his own weight management, and he said he struggles but exercises to avoid the worse of metabolic syndrome. I don't believe it. I don't believe that there is no such thing as free will. My belief in God and in free will leads me back to this question: Why am I eating when I am not hungry? Maybe I should just trust my body and eat only when hungry.

Tuesday, June 16, 2015: 222.0
Immediate failure. The advantage of writing down what I eat is that I cannot fail at it because I can do it after I eat. Also, it ties what I eat to the weight I am. I see cause and effect. Maybe that is the way to go. I can work on eating read foods, but I also need to eat less. By seeing when I eat, I can customize strategies to reduce the amount I eat. In the few days I have written down what I eat, I see that I tend to continue eating once I have started. Maybe I need a strategy to disrupt this behavior rather than just allow it to continue.

Wednesday, June 17, 2015: 221.0
Simplicity. I created a new tracking sheet. Previously, I was recording time I ate, what I ate, and hunger and fullness levels before and after eating. That's all gone. Now there are lines for what I ate. I got to late afternoon, pulled out my sheet where I had recorded what I ate for breakfast and thought: "What the heck have I eaten since then?" I did not have much of an idea.

The beauty of this simple approach is that I can see what goes into me and what I weigh. I tie eating to weight. That's it. I'm not adding anything else to this. No SET Guidelines. No restrictions on what I eat. Nothing. Yesterday, before lunch, I had both a full Hershey's bar and a Haagen Dazs bar, and guess what: I didn't feel so great. I think I was testing if I would allow myself to have those treats, and the answer was: Yes.

Is this enough for me to lose weight? I don't know. Maybe. Obviously, I cannot be stuffing myself every day and just writing down what I eat. The effect of writing down what I eat might -- and I emphasize the word might -- be that I eat less. I have a feedback loop. I can look at what I eat and ask myself why I did that and then plan to change eating when in a similar situation in the future.

I remember reading once that recording what you eat is associated with weight loss. The approach just never appealed to me at all. I hated the idea. Part of the reason why I thought to try this was I was so adamantly opposed to the idea when Kayla recommended it. Another reason why is we are somewhat cash strapped with my not working, so I'm setting up a system to track what we spend.

We paid literally all Tom earned in April and May to taxes. That set us back quite a bit. My working last year is the gift that keeps on giving because we got totally socked, even though I had my income taxed last year as a single person with no dependents and had extra come out on top of that! It royally irritates me. Tom makes a good income, obviously, to support a family, including two kids in college. How could we be spending all he makes? Good question. I'm answering it by writing down what we spend, even though taxes and college expenses are the obvious reasons why so much money is going out the door. It will help that I am not working -- isn't that pathetic? Yesterday, when I was driving our son to work, he said I sound like someone on welfare who would rather sit and receive a check than work. Well, frankly, I'd rather work, but it doesn't make sense for me to work if all the money goes to taxes and expense related to working. Besides, the checks that are being written are from us to the government, not the government to us. Tracking spending will quantify this for us in stark terms, but that what it looks like.

How could I weigh 221 pounds? I know I eat a lot. When Kayla talked with me about the possibility that my weight was not due to what I eat, I assured her I had no concerns. My weight problem is due to my overeating.

Now, to address both the spending and the eating, I am tracking what we spend and what I eat. There maybe be some surprises, and those surprises could be addressed but only if we see what we have not seen: if we see, for example, that our van with 180,000 miles on it is costing us a fortune to maintain. That is not the problem. I know that because that Sienna is in the shop today for routine maintenance at 180,000 miles. We do have an expense of $1,200 due to the routine maintenance. We have had nothing but routine maintenance on it since we bought it. Our Windstar, however, was a $500 charge every time we brought it in for maintenance, and we finally got rid of it at 80,000 miles when the transmission went.

The Delphic maxim is "Know thyself". Tracking is a good way to do just that.

Saturday, June 20, 2015: 221.8
Anne was on a paleontology dig in Western Kansas and called to say she was sick and needed to get out of there. I drove 1,650 miles in 50 hours. Today I feel stiff. My number of steps on the pedometer for the past three days is low. Guiding principles need to be flexible because life happens, but I am concluding that I am not looking at baby steps to become thin. I'm looking at leap off cliff: I need to have as a guiding principle that I only eat when hungry.

With my last experiment in early April, I learned that you become hungry gradually, and hunger doesn't become a problem for a few hours. When we were at Disneyland, I got hungry at 11 and we did not eat until 3. By that time, I was cranky hungry, but I would have been fine had we eaten at 2.

What does that experience tell me? I should wait for hunger, eat minimally just to satisfy hunger, and learn to manage my portions so that I end up being hungry for each meal. That will take practice until I have it down. While I do recognize hunger now, I don't really understand how to identify satisfaction.

8 AM: I only walked 6,264 steps yesterday because I was driving from 7:30 AM to 5 PM. Does that bother me? No. Why should it bother me if I don't wait for hunger on a particular day? I can track always but not be alarmed if I fall short of my goal of waiting for hunger.

Since I can identify hunger but not satisfaction, I think I should track whether or not I have waited for hunger before I first eat on a particular day.

1 pm: I realized that I could just track that I had waited for physical hunger and not worry about writing down what I eat. My goals will be to walk 10,000 steps or more 90% of days and not eat each day until experiencing physical hunger 90% of the days. This can be tracked on one sheet of paper in my planner.

Simplicity.

8 pm: I have now designed a form that is one page I can print out and put in my planner. It has a calendar where I can put the number of steps walked per day. It has a column of dates with a second blank column where I can put my weight. It has room for writing my strengthening exercises. Cheesy as it sounds, I have decided I will circle the date in the calendar whenever I exceed 10,000 steps per day and the date in the column for days when I do not eat until I am physically hungry. At the end of each month, I can calculate the percentage of days I walk more than 10,000 steps and the percentage of days I wait until experiencing physical hunger before eating. My goal is an A: 90% or greater for each of the two goals. Right now, I'm doing fairly well with the walking and quite poorly with eating if waiting for physical hunger is a goal. If I do both these things at a 90% rate, I think my health with improve and my weight will go down.

Sunday, June 21, 2015: 221.2
Simplicity is key. It is just too much, in busy lives, to be measuring out food, counting calories, and writing down everything I eat. I can wait for physical hunger and mark that I did. Will this work? I think so because I basically never wait for hunger. Will I overeat once I am allowed to eat? No, because overeating today means waiting longer to eat tomorrow. Any downside? Well, conventional wisdom is that you should eat breakfast, and that won't be happening at least until I learn how much to eat. Maybe conventional wisdom is wrong. Ideally, I will wake up hungry, but that will take time to figure out: how much do I eat today so that I am hungry tomorrow morning when I wake up?

Monday, June 22, 2015: 221.2
I am more focused on process than outcome now, which is good. I did wait for hunger yesterday, and I did walk more than 10,000 steps. That is what matters. My hope is that I am below 220 by July 1. If I am, then I can tell myself this process will get me to my goal of a healthy weight.

I was gullible to believe in low fat, and I believe I have been gullible to hear the constant message that hunger is a terrible thing. Hunger is a good thing. Hunger is God's way to tell me it is time to eat. Driving through Kansas, I was so struck by the beauty of that part of the country. There was some sort of purple vegetation all along the highway. It seemed so gratuitously beautiful. Just so, there is something glorious about our bodies telling us it is time to eat. We don't need measuring cups or calorie counting books or the clock. All we need do is to listen.

10 AM: I had my annual physical this morning for the first time in four years. It is hard to go to a doctor when you have gained weight. I weighed in at 223. I've had a very bad cold for the past week and was given a prescription for an antibiotic that must be taken twice per day with food for 10 days. I now have a medical reason to eat in the morning. How do I handle this? I will try to eat less so that I am hungry in the morning. That is my long term goal anyway.

Tuesday, June 23, 2015: 222.0
That medication is tough to handle. I did not even walk 10,000 steps yesterday. I must eat something when I take it, and I am supposed to have it twice per day. Maybe I can just eat once in the morning and once at night, taking the medicine when I eat. That may be a healthier approach than fasting until afternoon every day. The goal now is to experience hunger at least once during the day.

This may actually be a better approach. I can eat early a meal that is good for me, something like muesli or eggs, and then I can wait for hunger. It may be dinnertime before I actually get hungry, which limits the time of grazing.

6:45 AM: My weight is remarkably stable, and it stinks. I had in mind that I would get below 220 by the end of the month, but all I am is at the lower end of the 220 - 225 range that I have been in for months. Maybe I can look at short term changes to get me below a certain weight. It's dangerous to try that on/off approach, but it also stinks to still be so fat. Here returns No S. Maybe I can just eat 2 meals per day. If my goal is below 220 for this month, maybe my goal can be to be below 215 next month. I think I'm going to try 2 meals per day for a period of time, at least until the medication is done in 9 days.

7:30 am: Bad idea. I need to create the habit of eating only when physically hungry. There will be exceptions such as when I need to take an antibiotic. I need to take that antibiotic twice per day. I can still strive to experience hunger.

7:30 pm: Kayla left me with a quest: to find something in eating that is the equivalent of 10,000 steps per day for exercise. What is it? I think it may be my SET Guidelines. It's not so wishy washy as is waiting for physical hunger. I can tell, by looking at my pedometer, whether I have reached that number of steps or not. With physical hunger, there are different levels. It can be confusing. I think it is better to stick with something I can follow all the time:
1. Sit down to eat, if possible.
2. Eliminate distractions as much as possible.
3. Take hands or utensils away from food while chewing and swallowing.
My rule of thumb is that I follow these guidelines to the extent possible but still allow myself to eat. If I am at Costco and want to have a taste test, I don't need to sit down. If I am cleaning up the kitchen and want a glass of milk, I need to sit down at the table.

I think I'm going to put my effort into this until July 1. No journaling. No weighing myself.

Wednesday, June 24, 2015: 221.4
So much for not recording what I eat or journaling! I have circled backto these SET guidelines several times and given up on them. Why? They seem inadequate. Well, now I think I should follow them because they will get me in the right direction. Is walking 10,000 steps per day adequate? It's silly. I will eat less following these guidelines because there will be times I prefer reading over eating. I may not become thin but at least I can become less obese.

I think I should give these suidelines time -- maybe a year. My progress in Pilates has been painfully slow. I think I started about 3 months ago working on the cat cow, a basic move in which you arch your back like a cat and then let your back collapse down like a cow. I maybe can do it 10 degrees up and 10 degrees down without later experiencing great back pain. That's an improvement over my start. I literally started just in the position for the cat cow and then worked on a one degree up and down. Wiht my weight, I need to be grateful for any weight loss.

Maybe a year of nothing but what I have now for weight loss... The SET Guidelines from the very out of print book The 7 Secrets of Slim People.

Thursday, June 25, 2015: 220.6
There was a time yesterday when I was going to eat but then realized I couldn't eat and read so I chose to read. My hope was to get to a weight below 220 by the end of the month, and I am close! Simplicity is best. The human brain can only pay attention to a few things at a time. That is why Aristotle is right to say virtue is a habit. If you build virtuous habits, you are virtuous. I made the mistake, in work and at home and with my body, in trying to do too many things. Kayla told me that once, when I tried to add use of the bike downstairs to my cardio routine. She said to build the habit of 10,000 steps per day rather than go off on trying to add cycling to my shaky habit of walking. What I need here is to stick with three eating habits, no more and no less. I need to build a habit.

1 PM: Quiet day. I am cleaning up after painting a room. I have to ask myself: Why would these SET Guidelines result in less food being eaten? Why? I think it may be that I become aware of satiety before I eat as much. Also, eating is a break, so food eaten in a period of time is not so important as the period of time. Who knows? It's very odd. I would not have thought this would work.

Today is my father's 90th birthday. There is longevity in our family. There also is no obesity except for me. I wonder why...

Friday, June 26, 2015: 221.2
Not surprisingly, my weight went up yesterday. Based on how much I munched all day long, I knew my weight would go up. The real question is this: why was I so eager to eat yesterday? I believe the answer is that my body was not used to the reduction in food and reacted. This is almost like an animal getting used to being near a human. The animal will come forward and then back away suddenly almost to see if it is "a free agent", allowed to get away. We always tell the kids "Pepper is a free agent" which means she can leave your bedroom if she wants. With weight reduction, the key problem may be that there is need for flexibility to respond to the body's needs, and without that flexibility the body reacts by binge behavior. It's all very strange, and I'm not describing it very well, but I think it is good I ate yesterday. Today I don't feel all that hungry.

Saturday, June 27, 2015: 220.8
I am pleased that my weight is down again, and I see a good trend from this spring when I was above 225 pounds. I am completely satisfying my desire to eat, but I want to eat less because of following those SET guidelines. Why would this be? I'm not sure. Part of the reason is I tend to eat and do something else, particularly read. Following SET guidelines sets up a conflict between reading and eating, and sometimes reading wins. My guess is that this will take a long time for me to lose an appreciable amount of weight, but the weight loss will be significant over time. I think I should make an effort to create habits that are somewhat unconscious -- simply what I do, like washing hands before eating or brushing teeth every morning and evening.

Following these guidelines may result in an insignificant weight loss, but I need to try it out. I have a shot at being below 220 by July 1, and I hope that I could be below 215 by August 1.

11 am: A key goal of mine is that a healthy weight for me is something that ends up not taking a lot of time or thought, like the time I spend remembering to brush my teeth. Sure, I have to buy toothpaste, but I don't consciously think about brushing my teeth: it is so ingrained into me that I don't think about i.

If I am going to achieve this goal, I need to wean myself off writing about it. What matters is that I follow the guidelines and see what happens.

4:30 pm: Tom, Katie, and Ellie were at work this morning while Tommy was still sleeping before his 2 pm work time. I was in the family room touching up paint and listened to a National Weight Control Registry video on weight loss:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kNcaESoDng

It was very interesting. It's about the registry of 10,000 or so people who have registered and who have in common that they have lost at least 30 pounds and kept it off for at least a year.

Sunday, June 28, 2015: 221.0
I need to focus on process not goal. For the next year, I will work on making the SET guidelines a natural part of my life. I do believe this will result in some weight loss but probably not five pounds per month. Last year, I set as a goal to walk 10,000 steps per day. While I do record my walking, I often don't get to 10,000 steps per day. I can work on that as well.

Monday, June 29, 2015: 221.8
I set up a personal training session with Kayla for today, and I told her I concluded I need to do more than follow the SET guidelines. I'm changing the "T" to Take a sip between bites. She was skeptical and is promoting measuring out food. I set up another PT session for July 23 and said that the test of whether this works is if I get below 220, which I have not been below since September, 2013. I told her that the process will slow my eating. The open question is whether slowed eating will result in fewer calories consumed.

Tuesday, June 30, 2015: 220.6
I am happy with today's weight. It was not so difficult yesterday to take a sip between bites as I had feared, and it turned out I still ate faster than Ellie did. Maybe fast eating is a cause of overeating and not just an effect or a correlation. We shall see.

I was telling Tom that the National Weight Control video I watched (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kNcaESoDng) said that most long term losers walk a lot -- about 11,000 steps per day. He suggested I try for 12,000 steps per day. I do sometimes reach that number but not often, and I thought that actually might be a good idea. I now have one page in my planner that has a calendar at the top to track steps per day, a list of weights at the side to track daily weight, and a central area to list strengthening routine. This will be an easy way to track things.

While taking a sip between bites will be a pain to do, it is nothing compared with what Kayla suggests, which is to buy cups for different types of foods (vegetables, fruit, protein) and use size for portion control. No way. The diet backlash from that approach would be immediate for me.

The Hippocratic Oath is "First, do no harm." I think an approach of portion control triggers diet backlash, meaning binge behavior. No thanks. This approach of taking a sip between bites prevents binge behavior because you cannot eat fast!

9 am: Tom went off to work, since he is home this week. I am the only one up, and I was awake for about 3 hours last night. For about 8 of the last 10 days, I had Nyquil, and now I am trying to get over having that as a sleep aid. I am finally recovering from the worst cold I have had since 1998, and that is why I had so much Nyquil. I don't want to do anything, but maybe it is best to have more coffee and get through today.

There is a saying, "A watched pot never boils." I need to spend less time thinking about losing weight and let the process play out until my next personal training appointment on July 23.

It is critically important that I lose weight, but everything I have tried so far has resulted in weight gain. My focus is now on developing habits around how I eat so that I slow down my eating in hopes that this results in eating less. I have not worn my wedding ring in more than two years because my fingers are too fat and I refuse to get the ring resized. It sits in the safety deposit box.

I should just focus now on creating the habit of taking a sip between bites and see how it plays out. If I am below 220 by June 23, that is a good sign because I have not been below 220 since September, 2013. If I am even lower in weight, that is an even better sign. If I am above 220, I need to look at something else -- or something more.

I saw this morning that it can be difficult to eat a nectarine and drink water with the same hand because the nectarine juice can get on your hand. There will be some adjustments I will need to make.

It is a beautiful summer day out, and I should take Pepper out for a walk before it gets too hot. I commit to doing this and just this until July 23.

I...I...I... One thing I detest about dieting is it becomes all about me...me...me. A starving person, in other words a person trying to lose weight, loses all perspective and becomes very selfish, and I have become very selfish. My strongest motivation to lose weight is to serve as a role model for two daughters who are overweight, but the process still involves so much selfish behavior for most people ... buying special foods, measuring out foods, waiting for hunger... I want none of it. None. The best shot I have is to develop habits around how I eat that I could follow almost all the time. This has been by far the most frustrating experience of my life, so I hope this works.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Tue Jun 30, 2015 2:11 pm; edited 82 times in total
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Mon Jun 01, 2015 4:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
Yes, I spent years creating famines called diets. So what.. It was stupid. I am now going to focus on having regular, moderate meals. Yes, it sounds like No S...
Yes, you need to satisfy hunger, but you also live in a world with other people and with schedules. It seemed to me ideal to be hungry for meals, but how do you do that?
Hi Kathleen,
It seems to me like NoS vanilla is really the answer to your questions. It fits in with having a normal social and family life. It provides a way to respond to hunger, by eating a fuller or less full plate in response to hunger cues. It allows for just the right amount of "fasting" if you will, by keeping us from eating between meals on N days. What do you think is holding you back from embracing it?
I fear that cycling through thinking about IE and cultural fasting and the SET Diet, you are getting lost in your thoughts... maybe the thinking and writing about the options is becoming a substitute for action. I really wish you the best at finding a way of eating that is sustainable for you, and that you can get out of all this thinking and planning. Might vanilla NoS not be the answer for you?
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Jun 02, 2015 11:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

osoniye,
Part of the reason why I am still on this site is I concede the possibility that No S is my best option. I did follow it for quite a period of time and went from 215 down to 195, but then I got stuck. I observed two things about my behavior on No S:
1. A tendency to overeat at mealtime because I was concerned about getting hungry between meals
2. a tendency to binge all weekend.
Last month was an embarassment as I careened from one approach to the next and back again. This month, I just want to stick with The SET Diet and see what happens.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
Posts: 2458

PostPosted: Tue Jun 02, 2015 11:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,

Both your tendencies would take care of themselves if you stuck to NoS for one year to two years. It happened to me. Build the habit and trust Smile
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eschano - Vanilla rocks!

Started July 2012
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Tue Jun 02, 2015 11:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
osoniye, Part of the reason why I am still on this site is I concede the possibility that No S is my best option.
Thanks for responding Kathleen.
I'm glad you stick around here, and I hope that NoS or something like it will really stick and work out for you. We're all in this together!
If there's any way you would like to be supported, feel free to let us know. I don't want to keep harping on my opinion, as I'm sure it will come across as grating rather than supportive, eventually. Sometimes e-mail/the internet are awkward ways to communicate, as the tone doesn't always translate quite right.
I'm pulling for you- and will keep following your thread, wishing you the best!
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2015 10:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

osoniye,
Your posts are appreciated. I have a parenting philosophy that can be summed up this way: "Some things are best learned the hard way." Another saying is: "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." This is something I need to work through, and comments from others can help me see my blind spots. While internet communication is limited, it has given me insight to see blind spots and a willingness to work with a personal trainer on weight loss.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 3:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: June 23, 2015

SET Guidelines:
1. Sit down to eat, if possible.
2. Eeat without distraction (no radio, driving, etc.) other than talking with others, if possible.
3. Take hands or utensils off food while chewing and swallowing AND take a sip between bites, if possible.

In addition, I am using a pedometer and aiming for 12,000 steps per day.

Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to July 1, 2015: 1.0

Weight
Wednesday, July 1, 2015: 221.0
Thursday, July 2, 2015: 220.8
Friday, July 3, 2015: 220.6
Saturday, July 4, 2015: 219.6
Sunday, July 5, 2015: 220.2
Monday, July 6, 2015:
Tuesday, July 7, 2015:
Wednesday, July 8, 2015:
Thursday, July 9, 2015:
Friday, July 10, 2015:
Saturday, July 11, 2015:
Sunday, July 12, 2015:
Monday, July 13, 2015: 218.6
Tuesday, July 14, 2015: 219.6
Wednesday, July 15, 2015:
Thursday, July 16, 2015: 221.0
Friday, July 17, 2015:
Saturday, July 18, 2015:
Sunday, July 19, 2015:
Monday, July 20, 2015:
Tuesday, July 21, 2015:
Wednesday, July 22, 2015:
Thursday, July 23, 2015:
Friday, July 24, 2015:
Saturday, July 25, 2015:
Sunday, July 26, 2015:
Monday, July 27, 2015:
Tuesday, July 28, 2015:
Wednesday, July 29, 2015:
Thursday, July 30, 2015:
Friday, July 31, 2015:

Journal
Wednesday, July 1, 2015: 221.0
My weight goes up and down, which is frustrating, but I am going to track weight loss month to month. I did lose one pound between June 23 and now. If my weight falls below 220 by August 1, I should be happy because I have not gone below that weight since September, 2013. If my weight is above 220, well, then I am probably wasting my time with this approach.

Weight loss is frustrating in part because weight does go up and down on a daily basis.

5 pm: I want to write out the influences that led to my creating this diet. Here they are, not in order:
1. 7 Secrets of Slim People: This out of print book contains the ideas of sitting down to eat, eating without distraction, and taking hands or utensils off food while eating.
2. The Weigh Down Diet: This diet is Biblically based and mostly advises to wait for hunger, but there was a suggestion in there about taking a sip of water or other liquid between bites. The diet has fallen in disfavor because it got a reputation of being a cult.
3. My 14 year old daughter. She is an inch shorter than me and half my weight. She eats at the table to my right. She does not like to eat unless hungry, and she also eats slowly. She has commented on how quickly I eat. It made me think that maybe my eating fast is part of the problem.
4. The Declaration of Independence. The phrase "The Blessings of Liberty" come from the Declaration of Independence. I like that phrase and think that the limitations on the power of government is part of what secures liberty. Simplicity is key. You can't track everything. I was trying to figure out what to track.
5. Harvey Mackay. I have taped this inside my planner which comes from a Harvey Mackay column: "Many years ago, a management consultant named Ivy Lee was calked in by Charles Schwab, chairman of Bethlehem Steel Company, to give him advice on how to better manage his time. After observing Schwab for several hours, Lee gave this advice: 'Every evening write down the six most important things that must get done the next day, and list them in order of importance. Don't begin item two until item one is complete.'"
6. Kayla, my personal trainer: I have worked hard to build strength, and she has been my sounding board. She is quite skeptical of my approach, which I accept, but we have agreed on a timetable for determining if this approach is effective. If I get below 220 by my next appointment later this month, that is a good sign!
7. This board: It has helped to get feedback from people and to read about their struggles. Usually it takes time for what I am told to sink in. I also appreciate the encouragement.
8. National Weight Control Registry: I got the idea of the importance of walking from information given by the NWCR.
9. My husband: Long suffering, for sure. He suggested I up my number of steps. He encouraged me to move away from full time work. Too much to write... Some must be left unsaid.
10. Finally, my two other daughters, both overweight. They are my motivation. If I could figure this out, maybe they would not need to suffer as I have, especially if I find something simple to help with weight management like slowing down eating.

Thursday, July 2, 2015: 220.8
Last night, when I got about halfway through eating, I wish I had not put so much on my plate. Did I continue eating? Yes. Will I put less on my plate next time? Yes. I told Katie last night I thought this approach would work, and her response was: "Just like the last 153 approaches."

8 pm: I think that trying to wait for hunger backfires because you cannot have a habit with that approach: hunger comes and goes and is not always clearly hunger; it also comes at inconvenient times.

Friday, July 3, 2015: 220.6
I think that using portion control to control weight backfires because you have a sense of scarcity. When counting calories, you eat everything you are allowed. You get to 1,498 calories on a 1,500 calorie per day diet. By giving up any attempt to control portions, I am calming down. This diet approach is easy peasy. I have no restrictions on what I eat, when I eat, where I eat, or how much I eat. All I do is try to change how I eat. If circumstances make it difficult to follow the eating guidelines, that is OK.

The question remains: Will changing how I eat impact how much I eat so that I do lose weight? I believe the answer to that is yes. Time will tell. Bad habits take time to die. Last night, I did some eating simply because I could. I need to let that habit die a natural death -- it's too much bother to take the time to eat when following those rules.

12 pm: I started walking to improve health with no expectation of weight loss. When I look at these eating habits, I mostly see them as a way to lose weight. There is, however, another reason that maybe should be primary: to eliminate binge behavior. Binge eating, by definition, is fast eating. I think I need to give it a year to just do this and see what happens. Maybe I should build on these habits, but never ever am I going to resort to portion control.

I am away from all technology for a week starting on Sunday. That will be a good time for me to consider what I want to do after this next year of following the SET guidelines. The SET guidelines must be set before I move forward with anything else. I do think I will lose weight following them, but even more importantly I will have less out of control eating.


1:45 pm: I told my husband specifically what I was doing and why, and he said I was playing games, that I would not lose weight this way, and that I needed a goal like that I would lose a certain amount of weight in a certain period of time. OK. I've said what I am doing. He can disagree with it. Who knows? He might be right that I won't lose weight. I will, however, be over binge eating, and that is good in and of itself. Beat binge eating. That should be my motto. Any weight loss is just icing on the cake.

Saturday, July 4, 2015: 219.6
Today's weight is encouraging! Did I control portions yesterday? No. I was very busy, however, going to lots of stores with Katie, since she will be gone for a week with Ellie and me camping and then as a CIT (counselor in training) for six weeks. Still, I am below 220, which I have not been below since September, 2013.

I believe that the walking is not making that much of a difference. What is making a difference is how I eat and, in particular, taking a sip between bites. It seemed just too preposterous to take a sip between every bite, so I decided to warn my family that this was my new diet. I got cut off by Tom the first time I tried, and my family sure didn't notice I had slowed my eating by taking a sip between bites. I sit next to Ellie, and -- the first time I ate this way -- I still finished my meal before she did!

They don't care! I'm not offended. I'm happy! My personal eating habits are not that interesting to other people -- surprise, surprise! They've got their own problems. Tom was going to camp, but he's got to get a work project out. Katie is preparing for camp. Ellie has a project downstairs (building a dollhouse) to finish, or at least clean up, before we leave. Anne was home only for a few days, but I spent all day with her on Thursday, and she was skeptical of my approach. She wouldn't have noticed, either. She's got her own life -- a boyfriend, a summer project, applying to grad schools... Tommy is never around -- studying for an EMT, working at a grocery store, spending time with friends... No one cares. I've always felt so self-conscious with following a diet, but no one really cares. With this diet in particular, no one cares because it doesn't affect them. There are no special foods to prepare. There are no special times to eat. There are no emergency stops for food because my stomach growled. It's easy peasy for them -- and for me!!!

It's also flexible. I try to follow the guidelines but allow myself to eat if it is not practical to follow them. Yesterday, at Costco, I did try the taste tests even though no water was around to sip and there was no place to sit down to eat.

Rigidity is the death of dieting and exercising. There needs to be flexibility. I learned that lesson with walking. Now I just record number of steps and calculate average per month. I do not try to walk a rolling average of anything. At the end of the month, I calculate average steps walked per day. Last month, from June 23 to June 30, I walked 8,419 steps per day. The average number of steps per day was low because I was sick and on antibiotics for much of that time. Life happens! Flexibility is critically important!

There is so much going on in my life it makes my head spin. As the kids get older, they head in different directions to pursue their own interests. Our goal as parents is to encourage them to pursue what they want but still guide them to avoid life's pitfalls. One of life's pitfalls is poor health due to overweight and inactivity. Have I been a pathetic example for them! I cannot change the past, and my hope is that this simple diet, followed by me, will encourage my two overweight daughters to find a way to become of normal weight themselves.

There is poem called The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam, and in it is this passage:
"The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word it it."

It's an elegant way to say "You can't change the past." I don't think I will have much more to say on dieting. This is how I came to this diet. It's easy. If I can get to a decent weight following it, I'll be happy. Portion control is a terrible idea because you have a constant sense of not getting enough to eat.

It's already 6:30 am and time for me to go on with my life. My hope is that this diet is simply background music -- that I won't have to pay much attention to it and my weight will gradually go down to a normal weight. Maybe this is wishful thinking, but I've spent enough time obsessed with dieting. It's a beautiful Fourth of July, and we have two dogs to walk. It's time to move on and not be focused on dieting.

9:15 am: I just had a cup of chocolate ice cream. I wasn't hungry. I just wanted to eat it. As I ate it, I felt irritated that the idea of taking a sip between bites was buried in The Weigh Down Diet approach which focuses on waiting for a hunger growl before you eat. I tried that diet. I remember once, when we were in the van and I said my stomach growled, Tom made a big deal out of it. It was very funny. "Stop the van!" That was the idea. A hunger growl is not painful. You do not need to eat right away. You are not in pain. The hunger growl itself is not painful and lasts a few seconds.

Gullible. I've bought so much in ideas from so many people it is pathetic. I actually owned the first diet book which suggested the scientific method of counting calories and which brought misery to millions. I got rid of so many books that it may have gone with the rest, but for sure I will never follow that idea again, either. The book was by Ancel Keys.

7 pm: I may just check in once per month from now on. My goal all along has been that maintaining a normal weight would be as easy as habits that are so ingrained I never think about them, habits like brushing my teeth. It's automatic. I now have set up a monthly tracking sheet in my planner, and I can give a monthly update. This is a sudden change, but I think the time to dive is now. This approach is going to work.

Sunday, July 5, 2015: 220.2
I am hoping this is the last I see above 220, since I will now be gone for a week and away from a scale. I am beginning to figure out why this approach works. First, I can eat whatever I want so there is no need for what the authors of Intuitive Eating aptly called "Last Supper" eating. I allow myself to eat anything I want, including chocolate ice cream for breakfast. Nothing is forbidden. Because nothing is forbidden, the drive to eat now while I can is no longer constantly in my face as a drive to eat now. This morning, I am not having ice cream for breakfast! Somehow I had to prove to myself that I could eat it if I wanted it.

Second, there is a built in disincentive to eat. I can no longer grab something in the kitchen, or sit down with a paper and an apple, or eat while watching videos. There is a choice that must be made: eat or do something else, not eat and do something else. At least sometimes I'll do something else.

Third, eating now takes time. Taking a sip between bites means I have to dedicate time to eating. Do I want to take the time to get a glass of water and sit down with food and take some time to eat? Sometimes, the answer to that question is no.

Fourth, something is lost when I eat slowly, and that something is what was attractive about binge eating. I've heard it described as zoning out. It's like a mini vacation. Now I'll need to find other ways to zone out. Or, maybe, I'll need to face things I don't want to face. If I could date the start of this diet, it would not be June 23 when I formally began. It will be the day I recognized I could not work full time and take good care of my family -- that was the day I wrote on my LinkedIn profile that I was only available part time. I don't remember the exact day I realized that and posted that. It was sometime in May or June.

Life requires choices. The most memorable moment in class of my college years was when one professor raised his hands and said, "You must choose." I love to work but faced the reality that my family suffered, my husband did less well at work, and my health suffered because I was working full time. With that choice off the table and formally conveyed, I see other choices become available, including a goal of walking 12,000 steps per day and preparing healthy meals. We go to a camp this week where we will stay in a cabin, and I am bringing along celery, broccoli, plums, tomatoes, lettuce, and kiwi fruit. It takes time to have available fresh fruit and vegetables for our family. A big goal I now have is to find recipes with fresh fruits and vegetables. Katie found a good one -- chicken stir fry.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015: 218.6
I am happy about the lower weight but also a little angry. I was correct to think the defining characteristic of obese people is gullibility. Many are people who are well meaning and want to do the right thing so they follow the advice of experts. Here are four scientific facts that are trip us up:
1. Calories count.
2. Exercise more to eat more.
3. Fat makes you fat.
4. Eat only when physically hungry.

6:30 am: Let me vent.
1. Calories count: Yes, obviously they do. If you set a calorie limit, you will always eat to close that number. On a 1,500 calorie diet, you will be looking around at the end of the day to eat raisins or Tic Tacs to get as close as possible to 1,500 calories. You will always feel like you are starving.
2. Exercise more to eat more: This approach is even worse than simply calorie counting. You balance eating against exercise, and the approach ruins both. You don't exercise to enjoy it and feel better; you exercise to eat more. Again, there is a scarcity mentality. You never can eat enough. You always feel short of calories.
3. Fat makes you fat: This one infuriates me. For 30 years, I drank skim milk! Then the book "The Big Fat Lie" came out, and I returned to whole milk. Fat is satisfying. Low fat foods often are made palatable by substituting sugar or chemicals. I am now regularly eating bacon and full-fat yogurt. It's wonderful!
4. Eat only when physically hungry. I wish. This approach was the most enticing because I could observe my 14 year old do just that. She does not like to overeat. The problem with this approach for me is that it is just not practical. I eat when it is convenient, and I am so far removed from understanding hunger that I cannot easily identify anything except very clear hunger. I would lose weight very quickly, be somewhat unsocial, and be somewhat grumpy if I followed this idea.

So -- what am I doing? I am slowing down my eating and taking time to eat by following the SET guidelines. They provide a hoop through which I need to jump if I want to eat. It's not that difficult to go through the hoop, but it makes me not want to eat unless I have sufficient desire to eat. It's easy to follow. Over the last three days, I haven't followed it so well because of travel, but I'm back now to doing it. I could indulge in fudge without guilt so long as I had a sip between bites.

During my vacation, I read the book The State of Slim. I did not like the eating recommendations, which included eating protein powder and using fake sugar products. The information on exercise, however, was interesting. The argument was that exercise helps to regulate appetite, so those who lose weight and keep it off tend to exercise a lot. I set my goal at 12,000 steps per day. It can take some time and effort to do this. Yesterday morning, when the girls were sleeping in at the hotel, I walked to the grocery store next to the hotel and walked around and around -- 8,000 steps by 10:30 am. You need to be creative sometimes to get in the exercise, but you don't need to haul off to a gym or change into special exercise clothing or shower after walking. I know, I know, it's good to work up a sweat. I hate working up a sweat. Awhile ago, I stopped in to a lecture at the Mayo Clinic for about five minutes between appointments (I go down there for mammograms and skin cancer checks just because it is close), and I heard the lecturer say, "The best exercise for you is the exercise you are willing to do." Well, walking is the exercise I am willing to do. The authors of the book The State of Slim said that the Amish have a very low obesity rate: 0% for men who walk an average of 19,000 steps per day, and 4% for women who walk an average of 14,000 steps per day. If I only work part time, I think I can manage 12,000 steps per day. I just need to be conscientious about it and make it a priority. Maybe it is the key to my losing weight, because I want to eat less, not because I use willpower to eat less.

I am not restricting my calorie intake at all. Not at all. I am eating as much as I want. Willpower is used to reach 12,000 steps and to follow the SET guidelines, and that is it. If I tried to restrict intake as well, I think I would fail.

7 pm: I went to the safety deposit box and tried on my wedding ring. It was way too small. Then I looked back and found that I had taken off my ring at 208 pounds in October, 2011. If there is one thing I am determined to do, it is to wear that ring again.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015: 219.6
I woke up this morning at 5:30, weighed in at 200.4, went back to bed, and weighed myself again at 8 at 219.6. No way am I recording above 220 again!

When we were at the cabin, we had neighbors. The Dad was a recovering alcoholic. I asked him what prompted him to quit, and he said: "I decided I was allergic. Whenever I drank, I broke out in handcuffs." He had lost his license three times.

I have often wondered if there is such a moment in weight loss for everyone. There is such a moment for some. This guy told me there is a saying in AA: "If you don't remember your last drunk, you haven't had it yet." I did not get that saying, and he told me that there has to be something really memorable to get a person off the path they are on.

My Dad has a saying, "If you find that you have dug yourself a hole, the firs thing you do is: stop digging!" Yesterday, as I was eating ice cream just because I could, I asked myself why I was doing it. I was not enjoying the experience. I was eating just because I could.

Maybe I can just tell myself there is no need for a dramatic start. There is no need for a Day 1. All I need to do is to keep going and eventually I won't have that ice cream just because I could.

Thursday, July 16, 2015: 221.0
Coming home was a shock. I wonder if my eating isn't stress-induced. We were faced with a credit card bill that we cannot cover in total next month except by withdrawing emergency funds. In addition to eating without following my guidelines, I went to the start of the month and recorded all expenditures and then showed them to Tom. We need to stop spending as if we have two incomes!

Although I vehemently opposed recording what I eat and even told my personal trainer I'd rather be fat, maybe I should. I looked at some of our expenditures and thought -- How foolish. Maybe I could do the same with some of my eating -- How foolish that I ate that.

Weight maintenance is built into this approach because I am losing weight so slowly and putting no effort into losing weight if I get four pounds below the rumble strip weight. I don't want to lose weight quickly. Slow and steady means permanent weight loss.

Friday, July 17, 2015:
Saturday, July 18, 2015:
Sunday, July 19, 2015:
Monday, July 20, 2015:
Tuesday, July 21, 2015:
Wednesday, July 22, 2015:
Thursday, July 23, 2015:
Friday, July 24, 2015:
Saturday, July 25, 2015:
Sunday, July 26, 2015:
Monday, July 27, 2015:
Tuesday, July 28, 2015:
Wednesday, July 29, 2015:
Thursday, July 30, 2015:
Friday, July 31, 2015:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Mon Aug 24, 2015 1:03 pm; edited 49 times in total
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gingerpie



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Posts: 754
Location: Pennsylvania, US

PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 8:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen, It's good to see you back.
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 4:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
I am completely satisfying my desire to eat, but I want to eat less because of following those SET guidelines. Why would this be?
Hi Kathleen,
I know these questions are kind of rhetorical, but I always want to bite! It seems to me that just the act of slowing down and giving more attention to what one is eating can help to lower the volume of food desired.
For another thing, I love my food to be hot, and if I eat quickly, I can enjoy more of the hot food before it cools down. I (veeery briefly) tried the bites counting thing, just to see what it felt like, where you set your fork down and wait 1 full minute between bites. That meant that my food was getting cold while I was playing around with it, and so I guess in a way I was "satisfied" with less food, because after a few bites, it was no longer appealing.
That isn't something I enjoyed at all! I do so much better with my current system of serving my 1/4 plate worth of starch and 1/4 plate worth of protein and then pile on the veggies at will, until the plate is full (fruit sometimes on the side). That way I can eat (my steaming hot food) as fast as I want, but when I'm done, well, I'm done. Somehow that full plate in those ratios has been very satisfying lately. One never knows about the future. (I am on a No Added Sugar kick lately, decided to try it for 3 months, and I think my meals are somehow more satisfying as a result. I really don't know why that is.)
Hope you have a great month, and can get down to your 215 at end of July. I'm rooting for you!
_________________
-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 12:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sonya,

I'm debating as I sit here at the computer, and my debate is whether to add something more (taking a sip of a liquid between bites) or stick with the SET guidelines and let my weight be what it is. It does seem that eating more slowly lessens the amount of food that you need in order to be satisfied. When I was college age, I remember my cereal sometimes getting too soggy to eat. That never happens now!

I think I'll stick with the SET guidelines and accept if I do not get below a certain weight by a certain time. Last night, I could wear a pair of pants I've had in my closet for at least a year.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 8:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,
I'm glad for you, to see that you dipped below 220#. Go You! Sounds like the slowing down and concentrating on eating as it's own activity is a good strategy. I know the feeling of zoning out on a mini vacation while eating. I still allow myself that, but it is of very limited duration, since it can only last through my 1 plate full. I guess "1 plate" is portion control of a type, but it's one I can live with. I pretty much just prepare myself 1 plate of food on the weekend as well, I just allow for something special, too.
I guess it sounds to me like your limit, instead of plates is- how much you really want to eat in that controlled environment of concentration and sips between bites. I imagine it may work out to be similar in the long run... I think our stomachs only like to hold a few cups of food unless they are unusually stretched out
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Jul 12, 2015 2:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sonya,
Yes, this approach does have similarities to No S! I think my problem with No S was I was so afraid of getting hungry between meals that I loaded up my plates and pigged out on weekends. Tomorrow I will be home and weigh myself.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Thu Jul 16, 2015 3:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Blessings of Simplicity: July 16, 2015



Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – July 16, 2015: 221.0


Weight
Thursday, July 16, 2015: 221.0
Friday, July 17, 2015: 221.0
Saturday, July 18, 2015:
Sunday, July 19, 2015:
Monday, July 20, 2015:
Tuesday, July 21, 2015:
Wednesday, July 22, 2015:
Thursday, July 23, 2015:
Friday, July 24, 2015:
Saturday, July 25, 2015:
Sunday, July 26, 2015:
Monday, July 27, 2015:
Tuesday, July 28, 2015:
Wednesday, July 29, 2015:
Thursday, July 30, 2015:
Friday, July 31, 2015:

Journal
Thursday, July 16, 2015: 221.0
Coming home was a shock. I wonder if my eating isn't stress-induced. We were faced with a credit card bill that we cannot cover in total next month except by withdrawing emergency funds. In addition to eating without following my guidelines, I went to the start of the month and recorded all expenditures and then showed them to Tom. We need to stop spending as if we have two incomes!

Although I vehemently opposed recording what I eat and even told my personal trainer I'd rather be fat, maybe I should. I looked at some of our expenditures and thought -- How foolish. Maybe I could do the same with some of my eating -- How foolish that I ate that.

10:42 AM: I decided to restart, one pound lower than my start last month. I'm going to record what I eat, do my strengthening exercises, and try to walk 10,000 steps per day, and that is it.

Friday, July 17, 2015: 221.0
When I was going through our expenses, what jumped out at me was the $122/month membership fee at the Y. Much as I value personal training, at this point I am only scheduling one half-hour session per month. I'm going to have to investigate personal training for non-members, but right now I have 10 personal training sessions left. I dropped membership effective August 1. The only use we get out of the Y membership is for personal training. I tried a few classes and didn't like them. I tried the walking path which can be convenient in winter. The Y is just not worth the cost of membership.

How does this relate to recording what I eat? I may find that I am eating food that is not worth it. No examples from yesterday jump out at me. The only thing that I noticed was I was stuffed after dinner. Having given up my SET guidelines, I ate faster. Right after eating, I did not feel stuffed. It was only about 1/2 hour later that I thought -- ick! Do I return to the SET guidelines? No. I think not. I think I need to keep it simple and just keep a food journal. I have one sheet of paper per week that allows me to record time I ate, what I ate, my hunger level when starting to eat, and my fullness level after eating. It's simple. I'm also going to try to get to 10,000 steps per day.

7 PM: I munched my way through the day and served but did not eat dinner. As I lay in bed, I realized this was "diet backlash". I had eaten less than my body anticipated. Then I realized -- ha! -- this diet with SET guidelines will work after all! I just have to give it time and stay off the scale.

Sunday, July 19, 2015: I did very well on cutting back until I got home about an hour ago, hungry because it was 8 PM and I had not yet eaten dinner. I ended up eating several Toll House cookies and the last ice cream drumstick. Why? Well, I justified not cutting back because it was Sunday. Maybe I should restructure the cutting back idea. I think I need something like this -- a set period of time for portion control -- but I'm not quite settled on how to set it up.

Monday, July 20, 2015:
Tuesday, July 21, 2015:
Wednesday, July 22, 2015:
Thursday, July 23, 2015:
Friday, July 24, 2015:
Saturday, July 25, 2015:
Sunday, July 26, 2015:
Monday, July 27, 2015:
Tuesday, July 28, 2015:
Wednesday, July 29, 2015:
Thursday, July 30, 2015:
Friday, July 31, 2015:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Mon Jul 27, 2015 2:55 am; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Jul 18, 2015 12:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

JULY, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015


SET Guidelines for all foods except raw vegetables:
1. Sit down to eat, if possible.
2. Eeat without distraction (no radio, driving, etc.) other than talking with others, if possible.
3. Take hands or utensils off food while chewing and swallowing AND take a sip between bites, if possible.

In addition, I am doing about 10 minutes per day of strengthening exercises and using a pedometer with a goal of 10,000 steps per day. I do not follow the SET guidelines on Sundays, and I only calculate average number of steps Monday through Saturday. Sunday is a day of rest.

My weight loss goals are a modest two pounds per month. I have a maximum goal weight per month which is two pounds higher than a trigger weight. For July, 2015, my maximum goal weight was 222.0 pounds, meaning my goal was to never see that weight again. To help achieve that result, I have a trigger weight that is two pounds below that weight. At 220.0 or higher, an additional behavior was triggered: for nine days, I wrote down what I ate and tried to "cut back". During my nine days of "portion control", I also didn't weigh myself.

In August, 2015, my "never see again" weight was 220 and my "trigger" weight was 218.

Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0 (Goal: 222.0; average # steps per day June 23 - June 30: 8,702)
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0 (Goal: 221.0; average # steps per day in July: TBD)
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to July 1, 2015: 1.0

Weight
Saturday, July 18, 2015: 220.4
Sunday, July 19, 2015: 219.6
Monday, July 20, 2015: 220.4
Tuesday, July 21, 2015: 219.8
Wednesday, July 22, 2015: 219.0
Thursday, July 23, 2015: 219.4
Friday, July 24, 2015: 221.6
Saturday, July 25, 2015:
Sunday, July 26, 2015:
Monday, July 27, 2015: 220.0
Tuesday, July 28, 2015:
Wednesday, July 29, 2015:
Thursday, July 30, 2015:
Friday, July 31, 2015:

Journal
Saturday, July 18, 2015: 220.4
I have an idea why following the SET guidelines will result in weight loss. My body is in charge of how much I eat. There is no portion control, so there is no fear of starvation. If I am hungry enough, I'll follow the SET guidelines to eat. If not, I may or may not eat.

11:30 AM: I realized last night that this approach of following SET guidelines is similar to my Novena Diet (9 days of 1000/calories per day and then maintain for a month) in that, predictably, I would gain weight after completing the 9 days of low-calorie eating. Why? My body wanted more. Still, I ended up at a lower weight after 9 days of low calorie eating and 2 -3 days of binge eating than I was before the start of a Novena Diet. Over the next few months, my weight would creep back up to my trigger weight of 135 pounds. At 135 pounds, I would go back on the Novena Diet. Why did I give up that successful approach? I hated following that diet. I became reclusive and somewhat grumpy during the 9 days I was eating so little. Over time, I just could not bring myself to go on that diet again. By the time I got pregnant with Anne 22 years ago, I had such a built-up desire to eat that I gained a ton of weight. I did get down to about 150 after pregnancy and and was about 150 in 2002 (after Ellie was born) before my weight just went up and up. Many times I tried to return to that Novena Diet and never got more than a few days into it before my body revolted. This is why I think "portion control" is a bad idea.

What is different between the SET guideline approach and the Novena Diet? I never have to go off and on it. I can be "on" all the time. If my body needs a rest point in losing weight, then I'll just be willing to follow those SET guidelines in order to eat more. There is no visceral fear of starvation, of wanting more than anything else just to eat.

Last night, realizing that I would have times I want to eat more made me optimistic about this approach. I lost 2 1/2 pounds in a week at camp. My body needed a rest and even some weight gain.

I am still 1 1/2 pounds lower than when I started on June 23. I told Kayla that my goal was to be below 220 by the time we meet, which is next Thursday. Even better, I am through the desire-to-overeat period, so I can anticipate my weight going down again.

Weight down.. plateau... weight down. This is not for me to plan. I need to follow my body's internal signals to eat or not eat. So long as I follow the SET guidelines, I'll be more willing to follow my body's internal signals. Eating now take up more time than it had before, and sometimes I just want to do something else -- go for a walk, clean up the kitchen, take a kid shopping, go camping... Life is full of joy but dieting creates a survival mentality that takes my attention away from what life has to offer. I'm 56 years old and happy that I finally figured this out. If my children follow this approach and not get wrapped up in calorie counting, I'll be very happy.

What a trip this has been. The hard part is over. I am now committed to following this approach and will let my weight settle where it will.

Sunday, July 19, 2015: 219.6
I meet with my personal trainer on Thursday and told her my goal was 220 pounds. To me, having a goal can get in the way of following a process for the simple reason that you are at a decision point if you don't make the goal. Do you continue to follow the process or not? I decided that I should keep the weight goals very low and so achievable. I want to move the goals to the start of the monthly and have a monthly check in with Kayla. My goal for September will be 218 or lower and then two pounds lower in each month. Given that I weighed 219.6 as of today, that seems like a ridiculously low goal. In my defense, I have not weighed that little (at least as I have recorded here) since July 13, 2013. To get below 218 will be a big accomplishment.

8:20 pm: This is a bit of No S in my thinking, but I think I do need a predictable break in the walking and following of SET guidelines; otherwise, these breaks will occur periodically and without forethought, as happened last week. I'm taking a day off every Sunday. There really is no social reason to take a break; it's all the idea of a day of rest. While I have gotten rid of a lot of books, one I kept was Joe Lieberman's book on the need for a day of rest.

Monday, July 20, 2015: 220.4
I weighed 227.2 on March 27th of this year. There is progress. It is just very slow. I decided to weigh myself every day when I am home but just let go of the pedometer and the SET guidelines on Sundays. My weight did go up, but that is OK. I should be below 220 by Thursday.

Having a goal, even if modest, may be critical because I can look back and see the progress, just like I can say I am down almost seven pounds from March. I revised my tracking sheet to include weight lost since the prior month and weight lost since the start (June 23, 2015).

9 AM: I looked ahead. At a loss of 2 pounds per month, I'll be below 200 by June, 2016. Maybe I'll be able to squeeze into that bathing suit I brought camping with me and only used twice because it was so uncomfortable. By September, 2016, I can be below 194. My all time low with No S was 195.

This will be like watching paint dry, as the saying goes. I hope I will not have to give so much attention to the diet going forward.

10 AM: I have a scar from the one and only time I tried rope climbing down a cliff. If you do not follow the rope straight down to the ground and try to go around something, what happens is the rope pulls you back to the position where the rope would have been had you not been trying to go either to the left or the right of that location. That reminds me of weight loss. If you lose weight, your body rebels and pulls you back to your original weight. The only way I see to avoid what Intuitive Eating calls "diet backlash" is to lose weight slowly and also to take breaks. In the book I read while camping called "The State of Slim", the recommendation was to lose weight, take a break and allow for a plateau, and then take a break again. I like that idea except for the fact that it is so difficult to return to dieting. No S has the genius idea of taking every weekend off. My approach is much less restrictive so I figured, incorrectly, that I should not take a break from it. Now I'm thinking Sundays off.

2 PM: Taking a sip between bites works because it forces you to chew and swallow each bite. The advice to chew and swallow each bite was from The 7 Secrets of Slim People.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015: 219.8
I am glad I have until September 1 to get below 218 because I still am figuring out this diet. Yesterday, at the grocery store, I considered but passed on buying celery because I thought I would never have the patience to eat it following the SET guidelines. Last night, I decided to allow myself to eat raw vegetables without following the SET guidelines. Some need is met when I eat fast, and I'll allow that need to be met by eating vegetables.

Meanwhile, I have learned patience with my strengthening exercises. Kayla once said to me she was not impatient with me because I do what she asks and am consistent in my exercise. Instead, she is impatient with my body because everything takes so long. I have been working on the cat cow for months. I had such bad back pain that I just got myself into the position and now I am back to trying it with very little movement. Yesterday, I did one cat cow and had to roll out of bed this morning because of the back pain. Looking at an online video on the cat cow, I saw that I was breathing in when I should have been breathing out. Maybe that is the cause of all my difficulty.

At bottom, I think my weight problem is due to lack of understanding of how to lose weight, not lack of willpower. Just so, maybe I have had such difficulty with the cat cow because I was doing it wrong.

8 am: In preparation for meeting with Kayla on Thursday, I went back in my postings to find the dates I was last below weights that will be my goals in coming months. I had forgotten this, but I last weighed below 196 in August, 2010. I got a new scale and then my weight was much higher. Because the old scale was off, I only can track my weights back to that August when my first weight on my new scale was above 204.

Going back in time, here is the last time I was below certain weights:
218: 217.4 on 7/13/13
216: 215.4 on 1/2/13
214: 212.2 on 12/22/12
212: 211.4 on 12/8/12
210: 209.6 on 1/16/12
208: 207.0 on 12/12/11
206: 205.0 on 1/14/11
204: 203.6 on 9/14/11
202: 201.2 on 9/2/11
200: 199.8 on 8/11/11
198: 197.6 on 9/1/10

Is this ever sad and ridiculous... If I ever question my decision to lose weight slowly, I'm going to return to this pathetic list. When I get below 218 by 9/1/15, I'm not going to say. "Big deal... I lost less than 2 pounds in five weeks." Instead, I am going to congratulate myself for being at my lowest weight since 7/13/13.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015: 219.0
I sat right near a guy at work for a year right when he gave up smoking. It was a big deal to him, and it should have been. He made a tremendous effort to quit smoking. One thing he did was chew gum a lot.

For whatever reason, I have the drive to eat fast and while doing other things. I gave myself permission to be able to eat raw vegetables like that. Yesterday was a rough day. I ate tomatoes, celery, and green peppers. I had to force myself to sit down to have chili for dinner because chili did not satisfy my hunger, which turned out not so much to be for food as for an action.

7:30 PM: Today I had no interest in vegetables. All I wanted was to eat was ice cream drumsticks. At least I know I'm not pregnant! It seems to me that this is something of a test -- Will I allow myself to eat whatever I want in the quantity I want? The answer is YES!

Thursday, July 23, 2015: 219.4
Only Tommy and I have been home since Sunday. On Monday, I bought a box of 8 ice cream drumsticks because they were on sale and Ellie had asked for them. She'll be home tomorrow, so I thought I'd get some for her. Yesterday, I noticed the drumsticks were nearly gone, so I bought another package. Last night, as Tommy was eating one, I told him I bought another package because the first package was all gone. Tommy's response: "This is my first one." Ugh... I ate 8 ice cream drumsticks in two days without even realizing it. Tommy was going to tease me by telling Dad, and I said DON'T! In addition to feeling terribly embarrassed, I also feel rather sick. Sometimes I get a puffiness in my nose and feel a headache. Usually, I take Advil. I had it yesterday and have it today. Could it be due to having so much sugar?

This is going to be a long, slow process. Today I meet with Kayla, and I got below my goal weight of 220.

I'm not sure I'm going to have any of the drumsticks in the new package. I am sick of them.

12 PM: My meeting with Kayla went well. She was impressed I ate 8 ice cream drumsticks in three days without realizing it. She considered it portion control that I would follow the SET guidelines, but it really isn't. The desire to eat just isn't strong enough to give up the time to eat as much as I can eat in a binge. Meanwhile, I came home and ate an ice cream drumstick. I think I need to know I can!


Friday, July 24, 2015: 221.6
Wow. I had two thoughts about this weight. The first is that I'm sure glad my weight was below 220.0 yesterday when I met with Kayla. The second is that all those ice cream drumsticks did catch up with me. I am thinking I will add on to this approach rather than change it. I like the baseline that I have. The idea of a trigger weight, however, appeals to me. This month, I have not been above 222.0 pounds, and that is something to celebrate. I can call that my goal weight for maximum. I can also have a trigger weight two pounds below that weight. That weight triggers additional action, and I think it should be nine days of writing down what I eat, "cutting back" and not weighing myself. Yes, the dreaded portion control but only for a time. I'm gone anyway for most of the time through next Friday, so the timing to try this additional effort is perfect.

For August, my maximum goal weight is 220, which means I never want to see that weight again. If my weight next month ever is above 218, then it triggers nine days of writing down what I eat, trying to cut back, and not weighing myself.

I may not be back to report where I am until next month.

3 PM: this is rough. I wolfed down two tomatoes, had an apple, and then had an ice cream drumstick. If I don't weigh myself and record what I eat, I will be concerned about the weight I see on August 2. If I can convince myself to just hang on for nine days, that should be enough to have me stay the course.


Sunday, July 26, 2015:
I got through the night with two bowls of chili and a milk. No more ice cream drumsticks. What I am trying to do is focus on short-term weight loss. I am only trying to get below 218 pounds by August 2. I am not focused on losing 80 or 90 pounds. I did not weigh myself because the uncertainty over how much I weigh will help me not to eat. August 2 is when I will weigh myself next.

Monday, July 27, 2015: 220.0
I have been so focused on losing 90 pounds I haven't realized how hard it is to lose 2! This week I am away, so I cannot weigh myself until Saturday. I am not sure what I am going to do between now and then.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Sat Aug 01, 2015 10:43 am; edited 2 times in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2015 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

AUGUST, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015

I am doing about 10 minutes per day of strengthening exercises and using a pedometer with a goal of 10,000 steps per day (except for on Sunday).

My goal is to lose 2 pounds per month. With this slow approach, I can make a lot of mistakes and still make the goal.

Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 222.0; average # steps per day June 23 - June 30: 8,702)
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in July: 11,659)
Year 1, Month 3 - August 1, 2015: 218.6 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in August: 9,960)
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to August 1, 2015: 3.4

Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!


Weight
Saturday, August 1, 2015: 218.6
Sunday, August 2, 2015: 220.6
Monday, August 3, 2015: 220.6
Tuesday, August 4, 2015: 219.6
Wednesday, August 5, 2015: 219.2
Thursday, August 6, 2015: 221.0
Friday, August 7, 2015: 221.0
Saturday, August 8, 2015:
Sunday, August 9, 2015:
Monday, August 10, 2015: 219.4
Tuesday, August 11, 2015: 220.0
Wednesday, August 12, 2015:
Thursday, August 13, 2015: 219.4
Friday, August 14, 2015: 218.8
Saturday, August 15, 2015:
Sunday, August 16, 2015: 218.6
Monday, August 17, 2015:
Tuesday, August 18, 2015: 220.8
Wednesday, August 19, 2015: 220.6
Thursday, August 20, 2015: 219.0
Friday, August 21, 2015: 220.2
Saturday, August 22, 2015: 220.8
Sunday, August 23, 2015: 218.2
Monday, August 24, 2015: 219.0
Tuesday, August 25, 2015: 220.2
Wednesday, August 26, 2015: 219.6
Thursday, August 27, 2015: 220.2
Friday, August 28, 2015: 219.8
Saturday, August 29, 2015:
Sunday, August 30, 2015:
Monday, August 31, 2015: 218.8

Journal
Saturday, August 1, 2015: 218.6
I am changing the diet to a very simple one: every Monday morning, I weigh myself and then work to achieve a certain weight goal so that, by the next month, I am down two pounds. My goal for September 1 is 218 pounds.

No more SET guidelines.

1 PM: I went from being focused on process to being focused on results. I actually had a diet similar to this one and called it The Monday Morning Diet. My approach was to lose 1/2 pound per week. When I gained two pounds in one week, I was discouraged and stopped.

This time around, I am going to focus on two pounds in a month. My goal is at or below 218 by September 2 when I am scheduled to meet with Kayla. Today I weight 218.6. Losing some weight is easy. Keeping it off is tough. Losing a lot of weight and keeping it off is a challenge most people cannot meet. What I am trying to do is fool my body into losing a little weight but doing it many times. The key is slow weight loss.

I changed my tracking sheet to give the following goals:
- For the week of 8/3, to get below 218.
- For the week of 8/10, to get below 217.
- For the week of 8/17, to get below 216.
- For the week of 8/24, to get below 216.
- For the week of 8/31, to get below 216.

How will I do this? That is another matter. I think I'll figure that out next week.

Sunday, August 2, 2015:
I ate a lot last night and then did not weigh myself this morning. I then ate a fair amount today. This week, I am going to restrict my eating in order to get below 218. Once I get below 218, I will let go until next week. I can already see that this can cause binge eating, so maybe I should go back to the SET guidelines. Everything is up in the air except the goal to be below 218 on September 2.

Monday, August 3, 2015: 220.6
It stinks to learn the importance of following the SET guidelines, but now I have. I can recover in time to weigh below 218 by the start of next month.

Simplify. Simplify. Simplify. I am eliminating the "never see again" weight which was 220 for this month. I am also eliminating calculation of the percent of days I walk over 10,000 steps. You can only focus on a few things. My focus is a monthly weight loss of 2 pounds which I break down into weekly goals that are even more modest and the average number of steps per day (but don't track on Sundays).

I have a goal to be below 218 this week.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015: 220.6
I had no plan except to get below 218 this week using a portion control approach. Not good. Now I have a plan to fast until dinner and have fruit for dessert.

6:15 am: I decided to fast for three days and weigh myself after that. I need to look ahead to the end of fasting and not evaluate day by day.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015: 219.6
The nice thing about having such a modest goal of 2 pounds per month is I can mess up and recover. Yesterday, I received call from my youngest, who with her older sister is a counselor in training. She was to come home this weekend and her sister was to come home next weekend. She wants to stay for the last week of camp. I was happy for her, but it was a bittersweet happiness. She wanted to stay! It was so bittersweet because I felt like it was the bookend of intense parenting, with the other bookend being when my oldest Annie was laid on my stomach after birth.

I am now more of a model and adviser than decider. A cousin of theirs is going into junior year and is living with a girl this summer. We made it clear to Tommy that, if he lived with a girl, we would love him but that would be the end of financial support. He goofed off last year, lost two scholarships, and now will have a much harder time getting into med school. His choice. We do set the line of financial support at moral choices like drug abuse or living with a person of the opposite gender, not the everyday stupidity of goofing off through college. He'll grow up in his own time.

As for me, I feel as though I have made a 180 degree switch from when I was working. It is important for me to manage my health as a way to model this behavior for children who are immersed in an obese society. I think waiting for hunger is key, not portion control. Yesterday, I decided to go that route.

Thursday, August 6, 2015: 219.2
TexArk sent me a message about an online program where you can enter your weight on a daily basis:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/

I set up my account as Katheen! since Kathleen doesn't exist. It is very discouraging to look at a chart of my weight loss for this month, but it will be encouraging over time to see how a 2 pound per month drop in weight does add up. Patience is key with this approach. I need to tell myself that I am combining weight loss with maintenance. I am having to figure out how to eat less, and there will be lots of mistakes. For example, I am finding that a good substitute for ice cream is frozen fruit, and there are several fruits I like frozen: strawberries, bananas, and grapes.

Almost no one escapes the trap of obesity. No one. Sooner or later, the weight returns. If I get below 200 pounds by next June for the first time since 8/11/11, then I should celebrate. The weight loss I seek is permanent.

Yesterday, I did actually experience hunger at about 2 pm. It's hard to handle because I am so unaccustomed to experiencing it. I need to learn over time how to appreciate hunger and how to respond to it.

10:30 AM: I question the conventional wisdom that you should always eat breakfast. It comes from the fact that such a high percent of those who have lost 30 pounds and kept it off (in the National Weight Control Study) eat breakfast. This morning, I have been up since 6:30, so four hours. I've taken the dog for a walk and gardened and only now am getting hungry. My youngest, who is a slim 110 and 5'4", often does not want to eat breakfast, and in medieval times, only the sick, the very old, and the very young had breakfast.

Friday, August 7, 2015: 221.0
Discouraging. I think I've had it wrong all along, like the married person who thinks an open marriage is acceptable. Really? Is that a marriage? It seemed like a good idea to have a goal weight loss of 2 pounds per month, and I could figure it out as I went along. That's like going into marriage with love and no thought.

First things first: commitment. I think intuitive eating is the way to go. It is rare that I feel any hunger at all, so why am I eating? The main answer is because I can, because all those years of dieting trained me to eat whatever I was allowed.

Food prices went way up because the minimum wage went up. Maybe that can help.

8:52 AM: I decided to restart with intuitive eating only. My only goal is to wait for hunger. The weight that results is the weight I'll be.

Monday, August 10, 2015: 219.4
I am back to having June 23 as my starting date for this diet, and I'm looking at the core diet as losing 2 pounds per month. Over the weekend, I was able to see the Milky Way, and even the Andromeda Galaxy! The little fuzz of light under Cassiopia represents more stars than are in our own galaxy. It is so beautiful, more beautiful than anything else I have seen, including the Swiss Alps and Norwegian fjords.

Down to earth, I just shake my head at the time I have wasted. I think my motto should be: Consider the lilies of the field... I have wasted way too much of my life on my weight.

What I am trying now is very simple. I am trying to understand why I eat, and I have them in the following categories: Hunger, Mealtime, Pleasure, Social, and Sick. When I feel ill, I tend to have ginger ale, so I've got that as a separate category. Why else would I eat? Well, Tom was having malted milk balls in the van, so I joined him. Is that a social thing to do? Not really. He was driving, and I could have enjoyed his company without the malted milk balls. In fact, I rather dislike malted milk balls. So -- my goal is to work on eliminating eating except for the reasons onf hunger, mealtime, pleasure, social and sick. I suspect I may lose quite a bit of weight doing that.

Today is a cleaning day. Anne is home and has food from her dorm that needs to be put somewhere other than on the dining room table. We have to figure out fall college costs and pay tuition. I have to unload and clean the buckets from our weekend trip to visit Katie and Ellie at camp.

Tom just headed off to work, and here I am, blessed beyond belief. Do I eat as a way to procrastinate in cleaning? That is pathetic. I have in mind something Tom once said to me: "I'd trade places with you in a second." I have as a goal today specifically to not eat solely as a way to procrastinate in cleaning.

Thursday, August 13, 2015: 219.4
I have no real idea what I am doing to lose weight, but I only have in mind that I need to lose 2 pounds per month. Last night, I ordered a book of salad recipes from Amazon. This morning, I am going to "cut back", try to eat less until I reach 216 pounds. That will put me in good shape for being below 218 in September.

I think that you may need to be in two modes, one mode being "cut back" and the other being eat what you want.

Friday, August 14, 2015: 218.8
For "cutting back", maybe I can skip breakfast and avoid sweets until I reach the weight two pounds below my target for the month. Sunday is still a day of rest, so there is no attempt to lose weight on that day. Skipping breakfast is not what is recommended, but I'm suspicious of that advice which comes from a study of people who have lost weight and kept it off. It's not the behavior I see in my slim 14 year old.

Next week is going to be a very busy week. We are even going to have a neighbor's dog over, and she is quite energetic!

7:15 am: I think I know why skipping breakfast could be a good idea: I am getting a sense of hunger without being fearful of it. After all, I should expect to be hungry. Hunger is a sensation but it is not a sensation of unbearable pain. In fact, there is no pain. It is almost like a knocking at the door, a signal that my stomach would like food at some point in the future. I am headed out for a four hour drive. If I get to noon before eating, I'll be satisfied with this experiment.

Sunday, August 16, 2015: 218.6
I am back to my weight on August 1, and that is just fine. My commitment to a slow weight loss means that the maintenance phase is built right in to the weight loss phase. This week, I think my plan is to skip breakfast until I get below 217, but that plan is subject to change.

My waist is disgusting. I literally can grab flesh away from my stomach that fills my hand. If I lose weight slowly, I increase likelihood that I won't end up with skin hanging off my waist, as I have seen in some quick weight loss shows. This is tough, but it is not all consuming. I have to learn to become hungry, and it is way easier to become hungry when you know you will satisfy that hunger.

Monday, August 17, 2015:
Tuesday, August 18, 2015: 220.8
I tired to cut back on portions starting yesterday, and what happened? Binge eating. Last week, I was at Mayo Clinic for my annual mammogram, and I stopped in the education area where I could meet for an hour one on one with a nurse to discuss weight loss. Free. That's the beauty of Mayo. So much has been donated there that there are lots of opportunities for learning how to have better health. The nurse talked with me and advised not to concentrate on weight but rather health. She talked about current eating habits and suggested I focus on eating more vegetables. I think I will now take her up on that advice!

Wednesday, August 19, 2015: 220.6
I am horrified but have to take the long view. Yesterday, I stuffed myself with vegetables, but that is what I was doing: stuffing myself. Today, I decided to stick with trying to lose 2 pounds per week but go on a Novena Diet (9 days) which is much modified from my 1,000 calorie per day experience. Instead, I'll try to become hungry before I eat. No matter what, however, I'll eat every meal. This morning, I can have some yogurt and a nectarine.

Thursday, August 20, 2015: 219.0
I returned to following the SET Guidelines except I can eat vegetables anyway I want. My approach is now a little different in that I want to follow habits which result in weight loss, and I'll know I'm on track by my weight as compared with my goal weight. The goal weight is like the rumble strip on the highway. If I drive over the rumble strip, there is no car accident. Instead, the sound of the rumble strip indicates that the car needs to be steered back into its lane.

My "rumble strip" weight this month is 220, and my rumble strip weight next month is 218. I am at 219 today. If I follow the SET guidelines, continue walking, and do my strengthening exercises and that is all -- no portion control, will my weight go below 218 by September 1? I don't know, but I'm going to find out.

Saturday, August 22, 2015: 220.8
I'm on the rumble strip now, which means I'm above my rumble strip weight for this month of 220. What to do? I think I need to plunge in to listening to my body and eating only when hungry. Last night, Tom and I took a walk and I brought up that a recruiter had contacted me yesterday because in January I told her I planned to return to work full time in the fall. Tom told me I don't need to work and he is concerned about my working because I'm an absolutist and would plunge in to work and not pay enough attention to home.

He is right that I am an absolutist. I try not to be but maybe I need to just be an absolutist when it comes to eating: I only eat when physically hungry. Period.

11:30 am: After an incredibly hectic week, it sure is quiet. Tom left this morning to take Tommy to college, Katie and Ellie are at work, and Anne just got up. She gets taken to work at 3. I have not yet eaten and am not close to hungry. Today is a good day to start because only Anne will be home for lunch and only Katie and Ellie will be home for dinner.

1:50 PM: Not one indication of hunger. I am preparing the camping equipment for next week. Anne goes to work in 1/2 hour, and I have to bring her so that I have a vehicle. She gets picked up at 11:30. Nothing special is going on today because I'm the only one not busy! This is a good day for me to plunge in to eating only when hungry.

8 PM: Pathetic. I got to 7:30 PM without any sense of hunger whatsoever and decided to have some dinner. I then had some cottage cheese and a glass of wine. I remember from my very brief prior experiences with waiting for hunger that it does not come for a long, long time. Since I can grab a handful of fat easily from my stomach, obviously I've eaten way more than I should for a very long time. What I need is patience. Maybe I should plan to eat something every day even if I am not hungry.

Sunday, August 23, 2015: 218.2
I got up at 8 AM this morning whereas my usual time is 5:30 AM and that is part of the reason why my weight went down so much. Was I hungry when I woke up? Not at all. Because it is Sunday and Sunday is a day of rest, I got up and ate.

Simplicity. You cannot keep your eye on many things. I was looking for a single metric to use in managing weight, and I think I just found it: percent of days in a month that I become hungry before eating. This metric is like average number of steps per day in that there is no failure on any particular day and only a goal to measure against at the end of the month.

I'll use the calendar that I have for tracking steps to track the experience of hunger by circling the day on the calendar.

Everything I am tracking goes on one sheet of paper that fits in my planner. Simplicity. People can only keep track of so many things, so I'm tracking just steps and days or percent experiencing hunger.

There is no such thing as failure. There is only getting on the rumble strip -- weighing more than I have scheduled to weigh.

No portion control. No counting calories or points. No measuring out food. No worrying about social situations and whether or not I am justified to eat.

Hurrah!

Monday, August 24, 2015: 219.0
I ate without evaluating yesterday and am happy I am only at 219. I think what I am going to do is wait for hunger each day unless I am four pounds below my rumble strip weight. If it gets to dinnertime and I still am not hungry, I'll eat dinner. This sounds complicated, but I am only tracking a yes or no for each day: Did I wait for hunger OR not eat until dinner OR weigh four or more pounds below my rumble strip weight? If any one of these conditions is a yes, I succeeded for the day. That makes my effort on Saturday a success because I did not eat until 7:30 PM even though I never experienced hunger.

10 PM: Ugh. I started eating at 11, and now I am stuffed. I think I will just fast for the next three days and then weigh myself on Friday morning. We are gone this weekend for camping trip and cave tour.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015: 220.2
I am back on the rumble strip, but I have learned something valuable: I am too overweight to be able to eat only when physically hungry. It is better for me just to fast until I get to a more normal weight. My intent now is to fast for three days, eating only dinner each day.

7:30 PM: I started eating at 12:30, got the girls to the dentist (left at 2:20, returned near 6 PM) and ate dinner without any hunger at all, followed by wolfing down a Haagen Dazs bar leftover from Tommy's stash in the downstairs freezer.

Time for a recalibration. I think I may be doing more than I can. Maybe I can wait for hunger when I have some experience of hunger. Maybe I can fast when I've learned to fast between meals. Maybe, just maybe, No S rules are a good starting point. After all, I dd get below 200 following them.

I think what I am going to do is try have meals only, with everything in front of me before I take one bite, and no sweets for one week -- until September 2 when I check in with my personal trainer. All I need to do is get below 218 by then.

Wednesday, August 26, 2015: 219.6
I have come to a few conclusions about weight loss:
1. Fast weight loss is not permanent because you end up feeling like you are starving all the time in order to maintain the weight you have lost.
2. Following a program constantly ("lifestyle change") won't work because you need breaks. Having a "lifestyle change" approach makes you obsessed with losing weight because every moment you need to monitor what you are eating.
3. The opposite of a constant "lifestyle change" is an "on"/"off" approach in which something triggers you to go "on" the diet and something else triggers you to go "off the diet.
4. The scale can a useful tool for figuring out if you should go "on" or "off" your diet. I am using the rumble strip weight to determine if I should go "on" my diet.
5. Even if you are "on" your diet, you need to take breaks.
6. What determines going "on" your diet will change as you lose weight.

This is what I have figured out. This is what I have yet to figure out:
1. What should be the indication to go "off" the diet? I have been using getting below the rumble strip weight.
2. What do you do when you go "on" your diet? I have been all over the board on this one, but I think it does change as you lose weight.

My weight is 219.6 today, so I am below the rumble strip weight. However, I am scheduled to have my rumble strip weight be 218 next Tuesday. Do I go "on" my diet or not?

No. I know that I need to weigh 218 or below by next Tuesday. If I don't get there by being aware I need to get there, then I'll go on a diet starting next Tuesday. I think my "on" diet is going to look a lot like No S, at least initially. After all, I did get below 200 pounds following No S, and all I need to do now is get below 218.

Thursday, August 27, 2015: 220.2
I have no idea what I am doing. There is only the vague goal of losing 2 pounds per month. I meet with my personal trainer in five days and want to weigh at or below 218 by then. If I look at my weight for the month, I see that I have a lot of stability right around 219 - 220. It should be easier for me to lose those two pounds given the stability of my weight this month than it would have been if I had just lost five pounds. This approach is about having the weight maintenance phase built in to the weight loss process. Now I am at the end of the month and facing the need to lose two pounds, so what am I going to do?

Right now, I am thinking of recording what I eat and trying to stay below an estimated 1,700 calories for five days, including Sunday. That should do the trick.

Almost no one escapes obesity. I have to remind myself of that. Slow and steady wins the race. This could work. While it requires patience on my part, this diet allows my body to adjust to a lower weight -- 2 pounds at a time.

7:30 PM: Summer is ending. Anne went back to college yesterday. Katie and Ellie return to school on Monday. They can sleep in today and tomorrow and that is it. As for me, I have to recognize that there is no one size fits all for all circumstances in dieting, just like there is no one size fits all for all circumstances for a time to get up. It is entirely appropriate for Katie and Ellie to sleep in today and tomorrow, although Ellie has to get up in about 30 minutes to attend driver's ed.

I think I've been looking for the elusive one size fits all approach to losing 80 - 90 pounds as quickly as possible. That is a daunting task! Instead, I want to focus on having the scale register a 2.2 pound loss by September 2. That is it. I think I will write down what I eat and try to have no snacks or sweets for those days and see what happens.

It should be fairly easy for me to do. Tonight, Tom gets home from Tampa, and we will go on a camping/cave tour with Anne this weekend. We will get back Sunday, drop Anne off at college, and make sure Katie and Ellie are set for school on Monday. I won't have much time to think about eating, which is good.

Friday, August 28, 2015: 219.8
My personal training appointment is on Wednesday. Kayla was skeptical I could lose weight without measuring out food, which is something I am not doing. It is now Friday. I have five days. We go camping this weekend with a cave tour tomorrow. It will be noticed if I don't eat, but so what. I'm going to practice eating only when hungry this weekend and maybe through Wednesday morning.

8 AM: Too hard. I already had a peach. I think I'm just going to try to eat like a thin person this weekend and then see where I am on Monday. If I'm really desperate on Monday, I can try eating only when hungry for two days to make sure I am 218 or below by Wednesday when I meet with my skeptical personal trainer.

The fact is that I am stepping down in weight. I've got the idea of maintenance during the month but still need to figure out how to actually lose weight. It may be that I don't need to do much if I've got behind me a month of being just slightly higher. In this past month, I got to 221 twice but have generally been below 220. It should not be that difficult to get below 218 given that I've already adjusted to 220. I'm taking advantage of the phenomena that the start of a diet always has dramatic results. Maybe I should just view that I diet the last few days of a month only.

Sunday, August 30, 2015:
I am now trying something different: fasting until 6 and then having only one meal on days when I am on the rumble strip.

Monday, August 31, 2015: 218.8
I started the month at 218.6 and end it at 218.8 and am satisfied. My goal was to stay below 220 this month. Last month, when I met with Kayla, I told her my weight is very stable, and I wondered why. Now I think I know why: I have the view that this is my weight. There is a psychology trick that you tell yourself what you want to be: "I am thin. I weigh below 140." The fact is that I am so overweight that it is not credible for me to be saying to myself: "I weigh below 140." What I can say to myself now is: "I weigh below 218." I can slowly but surely change my self-perception, month by month, gently stepping down two pounds a month. This is a slow process, and I have to live with the knowledge that I will not suddenly become thin. I have to look at this approach and know that I won't get below 200 pounds for another nine months.

The nice thing about this blog is I can look back years and see that I have been thrashing around. It may take nine months to get below 200 but the hope is that I will stay below 200 pounds once I get there.

Today, I will fast until dinner and just have dinner. That should be enough to get my weigh below 218 for tomorrow's weigh-in. Fasting is a good way to distinguish between taking an approach to lose weight and maintaining current weight. I will end up with very few days that are for losing weight.

2 PM: Quiet day. Today it is bothering me to fast, but I figure I only have to hold on for four more hours. If I have to fast when I get to my rumble strip weight, I'm going to want to stay beneath that weight.

2:46 PM: I lasted until 2:15 and then ate a peanut butter and cheese sandwich, two or three chocolate chip cookies, milk, cereal, and who knows what else. I am not letting 30 minutes destroy this diet.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Tue Sep 01, 2015 3:06 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2015 1:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

September, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015

I am doing about 10 minutes per day of strengthening exercises and using a pedometer with a goal of 10,000 steps per day (except for on Sunday).

My goal is to lose 2 pounds per month. With this slow approach, I can make a lot of mistakes and still make the goal.

Weight and Step Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 222.0; average # steps per day June 23 - June 30: 8,702)
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in July:11,659)
Year 1, Month 3 - August 1, 2015: 218.6 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in August: 9,960)
Year 1, Month 4 - September 1, 2015: 218.6 (Rumble Strip Weight: 218.0; average # steps per day in September: TBD)
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to September 1, 2015: 3.4

Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!


Weight
Tuesday, September 1, 2015: 218.6
Wednesday, September 2, 2015: 218.2
Thursday, September 3, 2015: 218.6
Friday, September 4, 2015: 218.8
Saturday, September 5, 2015:
Sunday, September 6, 2015:
Monday, September 7, 2015:
Tuesday, September 8, 2015: 218.4
Wednesday, September 9, 2015: 219.4
Thursday, September 10, 2015: 218.0
Friday, September 11, 2015: 219.2
Saturday, September 12, 2015:
Sunday, September 13, 2015:
Monday, September 14, 2015: 219.0
Tuesday, September 15, 2015: 220.4


Journal
Tuesday, September 1, 2015: 218.6
I am on the rumble strip (weigh above my goal) and so need to lose weight to make this month's goal of being under 218. That is OK. I have a tendency to over complicate things, and this diet will only work if it is really simple. I am thinking that I will fast until 6 PM and only have dinner on days when I am on the rumble strip.

This morning, in the Wall Street Journal, I read about procrastination. One suggestion is to have smaller goals that add up to the bigger goal. I'm not focused on losing 60 - 85 pounds. Instead, I'm focused on losing .6 pounds for this month. That should be achievable.

The idea of a fast comes from my religious (Catholic) heritage. It was the approach recommended for people who were given to gluttony. Fasting is short and quick and requires no special foods or instruments to measure out food. I subscribed to Shape magazine, to my husband's amusement, and reading it has provided some insight to me. It seems to have as the audience those who focus on their body as a way of life. It was actually a bit creepy to read. Still, I'm in that same boat -- focused on my weight -- only I'm also obese. There must be a better way than portion control, and I think it might be fasting.

My impression has been that fasting is bad for your health, but I read somewhere that it can be a way to halt inflammation because a body that fasts focuses on core requirements and does not expand into inflammation.

My stomach is growling now, so it will be a long 9 hours to when I eat. I give this my only priority for the day. It's great that kids are in school and I'm stuck at home with a dog that we are dogsitting. My only task today is to clean up the house and finish up from our weekend.

Our weekend was just delightful, and it gave me such a sense of time. The girls went on a four hour caving tour and were squeezing through small spaces to get an experience of what people do when they cave. They found it interesting but not to be repeated. We took a walking tour and saw fossils of sea animals that were millions of years old. I had not realized that southeastern Minnesota had been covered by a sea millions of years ago.

I go back to Christ's words... "Consider the lilies of the field..." We are not to worry about what we eat or drink. Life itself is so incredible that scientists think the likelihood of life developing is so remote that they have come up with a theory that there are universes other than our own, and we are in a universe with perhaps 10 billion galaxies.

To worry about weight and food is a timesink, which is why I think fasting may be the way to go.

6:36 PM: I may need to rethink the fasting idea. I waited until 6 PM to eat and then ate two platefuls of spaghetti and meatballs, three chocolate chip cookies, and two bags of frozen grapes along with milk by 6:24 PM.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015: 218.2
I had wanted to be at or below 218 by the time I met with my personal trainer today. Oh well. I learned a good lesson yesterday: if I experience physical hunger, I should eat. What I did instead was wait until 6 PM and then wolf down everything in sight. This morning, I've already experienced physical hunger, so I'm having breakfast. I just changed my one-page tracking sheet so I track the number of days I experience physical hunger. Maybe it should be a percent.

A lot of this effort has to do with changing self-perception. I have an ingrained perception of myself as obese. I need to tell myself "I weigh below 218." In the past, I have cut back if I got above 225 or other weights. Now I'll focus on cutting back this month if I get above 218.

Thursday, September 3, 2015: 218.6
This morning, when I got on the scale, I feared I might weigh as high as 220, since I had several cookies and two cups of ice cream last night. It was stressful trying to get below 218 by yesterday, and then I didn't and it didn't really matter.

My personal trainer was impressed. She went back in her notes and saw my highest weight was 227.2 on March 27, so I was down a full 9 pounds. When she asked what I was doing differently, I couldn't say anything specific, only that I am telling myself I weigh below 218. I am working to change my self-image, two pounds at a time.

This morning, I don't feel any drive to overeat. I let myself overeat last night without guilt because I figured I'd have to make up for it today. Instead, I can eat in a way that I now consider normal. I just had some yogurt and will have a latte later this morning when I have coffee with a friend.

Friday, September 4, 2015: 218.8
Kayla, my personal trainer, asked me two days ago what I was doing differently, and I said the only thing I was doing was telling myself, "I weigh below 218."

I am perhaps seeing a pattern this month that is the same as last month's pattern: getting close to the rumble strip weight and then eating to go above it. Last month, I ate to 221.0. This month, I got on the scale and saw 218.8 with some disgust because my self-concept has now become that I weigh below 218.

I don't want to eat. I feel fat at 218.8.

Yes, it sounds bizarre, but I have years of experience with losing weight only to experience "diet backlash" which I always assumed was physical. Maybe the experience of binge eating after dieting and losing weight is actually a psychological rebellion.

Who knows, but I also have a cold and no interest in food this morning. Incredibly, a recruiter set up an interview 2 miles from my house for a 25 hour per week position for three months. Tom doesn't really want me to work, but I said I could handle 20 hours per week. We'll see if that holds. The company will have to understand that I can work 20 hours per week within the 40 but need flexibility. Four kids is just a lot of work even if they are older. Next Friday, for example, Katie gets two wisdom teeth out.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015: 218.4
I am supposed to weigh .4 pounds lower. That should not be difficult to reach. Yesterday I "fasted" until noon. Today I will try fasting until 1. Typically, when I lose weight, I feel famished, and my body wants to return to that weight. There is an urgency that reminds me of when my brother held me underwater when I was about 10: my body simply took over to get me to the surface of the water.

With this slow approach, there is none of that. I feel ever so slightly thinner, and it feels better!

Wednesday, September 9, 2015: 219.4
I am not surprised by the weight increase today. I was driving home from school at 7:30 and experienced what could have been hunger. The sad result of dieting is you think of hunger as bad. It is good -- it is the natural way your body lets you know it needs food.

I was thinking I would fast when I am on the rumble strip, bur now I don't know what I'm going to do.

5:50 AM: I think I know what I should do. I read somewhere that people who diet are so afraid of hunger because, when they experience it, they try to endure it instead of satisfy it, and we know how that goes -- hunger, to dieters, signals the end of the diet. I think what I need to do is to desire hunger, so my tracking for losing weight should be percent of days I experience hunger. I need to look upon experiencing hunger as a good thing.

Thursday, September 10, 2015: 218.0
I did not even get hungry yesterday and did not restrict my eating in any way, and yet the scale shows me down to 218. Very curious. I don't know what I am doing except saying to myself, "I weigh below 218 pounds." There must be changes to my eating. The only thing I can say for sure I have done is order a whole milk latte without vanilla instead of with vanilla, but I only have Starbucks a couple of times per month. What is going on? I think I have calmed down about eating so that "diet backlash" does not occur. My goal is to be below 218, and I am at 218 today. I have the entire month to maintain that weight. Not a big deal!

Friday, September 11, 2015: 219.2
On this anniversary of 9/11, it feels foolish to be thinking that I am suffering from Post Traumatic Diet Syndrome, but I think that is what I have. Yesterday, I was going to have an early dinner before going to buy a dryer near where I was set to attend a professional meeting, only Ellie needed a trip to buy something for school. No dinner until 8:30, and then I ate a lot. A lot.

Why? I wasn't even officially hungry -- no growl, no clear indication of hunger. I think that I have had too many times in my life when I skipped meals or decided I had already eaten enough that day, and my body reacted almost in survival mode to what amounted to a delay of two to three hours from normal dinner time.

So what... I can continue with the thought that I weigh below 218, and my weight will drift back down to that weight.

Monday, September 14, 2015: 219.0
I am down 3 pounds since June 23. That does not seem like a lot, but I feel very comfortable at this weight. My goal for the month is to be down just one more pound. With dieting, I have looked at the incredible amount of weight I need to lose (at least 70 pounds) and been so discouraged I just started eating. It is much more manageable to just say I need to lose one more pound this month.

I'm still not sure of an approach but am starting to settle on not eating in the morning on weekdays until I experience hunger if I am on the rumble strip.

Sundays are a day of rest, which means I eat exactly what I want. Being able to look forward to that day and enjoy it is key.

12 PM: I totally failed on waiting for hunger. I felt maybe possibly a little hungry and then, at about 10:45 AM, proceeded to eat a lot. Now I am stuffed and thinking I should just stick with "I weigh below 218 pounds" as a strategy. It sounds totally silly, but it seems to work. I look at food and think I'm too fat to eat it!

Tuesday, September 15, 2015: 220.4
Very disappointing but not unexpected. I did not eat until 10:40 and then ate and ate and ate and it did not help to be making biscotti last night.

What have I learned? I have an almost survival reaction to any sensation of hunger. Very late last night, I got an email with an ad on helping to prevent the tragedy of childhood hunger. It is not a tragedy to experience hunger. It is a tragedy to not experience hunger.

This is a fact from the No Kid Hungry site: "Children who face hunger are more susceptible to obesity and its harmful health consequences as children and as adults." Face hunger? Give me a break. You are supposed to get hungry before you eat. That is my goal!

I'm taking an interim approach that sounds like No S. I'm going to try weekday No S (no snacks, no sweets, no seconds) when I am on the rumble strip. This morning, after I brought the kids to school, I made myself two eggs, two slices of bacon and milk. That was a solid breakfast. Was I hungry? Not at all, and that is OK.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Wed Sep 16, 2015 11:35 am; edited 1 time in total
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Tue Sep 15, 2015 4:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen wrote:
I'm taking an interim approach that sounds like No S. I'm going to try weekday No S (no snacks, no sweets, no seconds) when I am on the rumble strip.
Sounds really great, Kathleen. Hope that works very well for you. I like your "rumble strip" idea.
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2015 11:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Total fail. I'm switching from results to process.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2015 11:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

September, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting September 20, 2015

Weight and Step Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – September 20, 2015: 219.0 ; average # steps per day September 20 - 30, 2016: x

I am following an approach that consists of three goals:
1. Walk an average of 10,000 steps per day
2. Do strengthening exercises of 10 - 15 minutes per day.
3. Experience hunger before the first time I eat in the morning.
Sunday is a day of rest. I do not use a pedometer on Sunday or track if I experience hunger before eating. I do a couple of minutes of strengthening exercises only on Sundays. My strengthening program changes from month to month based on recommendations from my personal trainer, but it is not all that difficult. For example, I do a total of 30 squats per week and 30 lunges per week.

There is no weight goal. I want to be at the weight that results from following the program above. For years, I have thought the ideal is to experience hunger before eating, but there are social complications with that approach. Now, I have a much more realistic approach. I only track the experience of hunger before I eat in the morning, and I allow myself a 10% break from perfection. My goal is only to experience hunger before I first eat for 90% of the days, and Sunday is excluded. This does not seem like a difficult program to track. Everything can be tracked on one sheet of paper which goes in my planner.

Weight summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!


Weight
Wednesday, September 16, 2015: 221.2
Thursday, September 17, 2015: 219.4
Friday, September 18, 2015: 219.0
Saturday, September 19, 2015: 219.8
Sunday, September 20, 2015: 219.0
Monday, September 21, 2015: 219.8
Tuesday, September 22, 2015: 220.2

Journal
Wednesday, September 16, 2015: 221.2
I ended up giving myself permission to eat a lot yesterday, and I did. It was a farewell to a different way of life. Just as I have looked at walking an average of 10,000 steps per day, so I am now looking at a process of waiting for hunger 90% of days other than Sunday. No goals. No focus on results -- what I weigh. Just a focus on process.

I believe I need to plunge into this (start off waiting for hunger 90% of days) rather than go slowly (increasing the number of days I wait for hunger), because there will be days I just let go and eat whatever is in sight.

What I will measure is % of days I become hungry before eating anything.


Even after this debacle, I weigh slightly less than I did on June 23. There is no way I will weigh this much tomorrow. I am stuffed to feeling sick.
I don't want any food.

1:22 PM: Tom has an all-day interview today, and I am hoping it goes well for him. Meanwhile, I'm not doing much. I feel something that is not yet hunger but is getting close. In an hour, I'll drive over to the school to drive Katie and Ellie to work. My only duty today is to get them to work and pick them up at 7. That is good because it is an adjustment to get to hunger.

Thursday, September 17, 2015: 219.4
Yesterday was a memorable day. I got hungry at 2 PM and then allowed myself to eat anything I wanted for the rest of the day. It was surprising but I did not really want all that much. I think that reaching hunger actually affects appetite.

The other realization from yesterday is that this is it: I am not looking to have an approach of staying on a diet until reaching a certain weight and then going off that diet. This approach is like my commitment to walk 10,000 steps per day: day in and day out for as many years as I can.

I was happy to step on the scale this morning and see a number lower than 220. I was even happier to experience a hunger growl at 11:30, which is earlier than yesterday's experience of hunger at 2 PM.

My eating rarely changes an internal sensation of either hunger or satiety. Usually, the only sensation I feel is "stuffed" -- ugh, I ate too much! With this approach, I don't really reach a sensation of satiety but I do experience hunger.

Friday, September 18, 2015: 219.0
Yesterday, after I experienced hunger at about 11:30 AM, I stuffed myself with breakfast cookies that I made from a recipe I found in a magazine, and so I was pleasantly surprised that my weight was down again this morning. Maybe I felt like I was stuffed because I had gotten hungry first.

Last night, I emptied a container with rice in it, and there on the lid was an ad for an organization called stophungernow.com. Really? Stop hunger now? My goal is hunger.

Sure, it is hard to endure hunger, but reaching hunger before eating is normal. When did that obvious truth fade from view? I can look back to my childhood when my mother would admonish me not to "spoil your appetite before dinner." That phrase -- "spoil your appetite" -- is no longer in use.

I have often thought that the defining characteristic of obese people is naivete -- credulity -- gullibility. Now I am thinking the gullibility has to do with the view of hunger.

The current wisdom is that "portion control" is key to weight management. Maybe the real wisdom is to become hungry and then to satisfy that hunger. You don't satisfy hunger with portion control. You need to give yourself to eat as much as will satisfy you.

I have one data point per day -- the first experience of hunger -- and I'm going to have to figure out how much to eat so that I become hungry by breakfast. Tomorrow, Tom and I are going out to breakfast with two other couples, so I am likely to eat even if I am not hungry. That is OK. That is why I have the 90% guideline: I'm only trying to reach hunger before eating 90% of the time.

Saturday, September 19, 2015: 219.8
I would not accept $100 to take one bite of food. I feel so nauseous that I skipped the breakfast. Tom thinks I am upset that he is leaning towards the less prestigious job. No. He got upset with me because I wanted to understand the health insurance. I told him that I spent two months last year totally consumed by my job and the more prestigious job means 24 X 7 consumption. No. My problem is I overate yesterday.

Tom is not going to hear that. I feel foolish but informed. I remember reading somewhere that thin people tend to dislike the feeling of being full. I remember Ellie holding her stomach once and saying, "Ugh. I ate too much."

Now I am experiencing the same thing. Why? Why? I suspect I know why I am experiencing a significantly unpleasant distention in my stomach: it's because I waited until I was hungry before I ate.

I changed my start in tracking weight to yesterday's 219 pounds which is more in line with what I was tracking before I switched to waiting for hunger. Also, 219 is an easier weight to use for tracking weight loss by month going forward.

11 AM: I slept in. Tom brought the girls to work before driving to Chicago for a wedding. I am home alone. I need to plunge in to eating when hungry. I need to plunge in. This is what I was trying to avoid. I wanted gradual weight loss without any sort of drama.

I have a program I can follow. It will be tough at first as I learn to eat the amount that will result in hunger first thing in the morning. What I recall from dieting is I would wake up in the night if I felt hungry, so I'm going to have to learn to sleep with hunger.

September 19 is a good date for starting this diet because I realized on that day that my goal was hunger.

3:15 PM: I got hungry at 1 PM and now am somewhat stuffed. The memory of how awful I felt this morning is keeping me from eating more. I don't have a "stop" button naturally on my eating and wonder why.

Sunday, September 20, 2015: 219.0
Today is better. I woke up feeling some food in my stomach but not sick and not stuffed. I think the big problem for me is that I have inappropriate decision points for when to eat. I start eating when not feeling stuffed and stop eating when feeling stuffed. What I need to do is start eating when feeling hungry and stop eating when no longer feeling hungry. What I've been doing the last few days is start eating when feeling hungry and stop eating when feeling stuffed. That led to feeling sick.

I think I'll make today the start of my diet. I will still just track that I waited for hunger before I first eat, but I'll monitor when I start and stop eating throughout the rest of the day.

Monday, September 21, 2015: 219.8
Maybe the rumble strip concept isn't all that bad of a concept. I'm sitting at 219.8, and I have spent three months between 222 and 218. While I will keep my start date at yesterday, I have learned much since June 23. I had Ellie take my picture yesterday at 219. The next time she takes my picture will be when I am below 210. How will I get there? It has to be by learning to respect hunger.

It is not enough to wait for hunger -- I now know that. What I also need to do is eat from hunger to non hunger. I am used to feeling something when I am done eating -- stuffed! That will have to change.

I want to be below 218 for this month, so today I will wait for hunger and then only eat a little -- maybe some soup. I won't give myself permission to eat as much as I desire. Since I experience hunger episodically, eating some soup will not change my sensation of hunger. It's hard to describe, but I think that thin people may wait until they are constantly hungry so they can satisfy that hunger with food. When you experience a brief moment of hunger, you aren't hungry by the time you eat. So bizarre. So bizarre... I have to tap into the wisdom of a child, the wisdom I can barely remember from when I was a child -- that you eat when you are hungry and stop eating when you are no longer hungry.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015: 220.2
I am giving myself a pass on yesterday's eating, with Tom waivering between two good offers and deciding to resign today to avoid having to get on a plane tonight. I waited yesterday until 1/2 hour after I got hungry before I started eating, and then I just did not stop.

Trying to read hunger is hard. Trying to wait for hunger is hard. What I am now doing is writing down what I eat.

It is simple. It is a pain. This summer, Tom and I discussed budgeting, and I first wanted to write down what we spent. He said doing that would have no impact on spending. He was wrong. I quickly realized that Katie was the moneypit. It wasn't just clothing she needed. She wanted special foods, etc.

Tracking expenditures makes me more careful without having to budget for everything, including the unexpected.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Wed Sep 23, 2015 2:47 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 2:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

September, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015

I am doing about 10 minutes per day of strengthening exercises and using a pedometer with a goal of 10,000 steps per day (except for on Sunday).

My goal is to lose 2 pounds per month. With this slow approach, I can make a lot of mistakes and still make the goal.

Weight and Step Summary
Year 1, Month 1 – June 23, 2015: 222.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 222.0; average # steps per day June 23 - June 30: 8,702)
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in July:11,659)
Year 1, Month 3 - August 1, 2015: 218.6 (Rumble Strip Weight: 220.0; average # steps per day in August: 9,960)
Year 1, Month 4 - September 1, 2015: 218.6 (Rumble Strip Weight: 218.0; average # steps per day in September: 8,480)
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to September 1, 2015: 3.4

Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Wednesday, September 23, 2015: 220.0
Thursday, September 24, 2015: 219.6
Friday, September 25, 2015: 219.4
Saturday, September 26, 2015:
Sunday, September 27, 2015:
Monday, September 28, 2015: 218.8
Tuesday, September 29, 2015: 220.8
Wednesday, September 30, 2015: 218.6



Journal
Wednesday, September 23, 2015: 220.0
I am back to having a 2 pound per month weight loss goal, and I think the process for me to follow is to write down what I eat when I am above my rumble strip weight. I hate writing down what I eat.

1:41 PM: I changed my mind. I had to print off some pictures for Ellie for a school project and ended up getting a print of the picture she took of me on Sunday when I weighed 219 pounds. This was not exactly the motivation to change my approach, but it confirmed me in changing. I need to look at food as poison if I am not hungry and trust that things will work out of I develop an aversion for eating without hunger.

Thursday, September 24, 2015: 219.6
It is just after 11 AM, and I have not eaten since yesterday when I decided that food is poison if I am not hungry.

This approach is very different. No longer am I waiting for hunger. Instead, I am creating an aversion to eating food when not hungry. I am envisioning it as poison.

Friday, September 25, 2015: 219.4
This morning, I thought that it is easier to dream big than act small. I am back to my plan to lose two pounds per month. Looking of a Socrates quote for Ellie, I found this gem from him: "Be as you wish to seem." Maybe I can just take the tactic of "fake it till you make it" with regard to weight loss and eat in a way that is normal when I am above my rumble strip weight. Today, I weigh 219.4. It should be easy to get below 218 by the end of the month.

This morning, I had muesli and an apple. That is a good, healthful breakfast.

Monday, September 28, 2015: 218.8
I took a detour but can still get back on track. My goal this month is only .8 lower than where I am right now. I can do it! The beauty of this approach is I face today with a fork in the road: Do I "cut back" to get below 218 and project out significant weight loss over the next few years, or do I stay where I am at a weight that is gross? What is my choice for today? I think I'll have oatmeal for breakfast.

I wish I could come up with a set of rules to follow, but that just seems to lead to disaster. Instead, I'll focus on outcome: my goal is to get below 218. Starting on Thursday, it will be to get below 216.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015: 220.8
We are planning a trip to Yellowstone in June, and I read about hiking there. Then I realized I'd weigh 200 pounds in June at a loss rate of 2 pounds per month. That was too much to weigh, so I decided that I needed to lose weight more quickly. Then there was "Last Supper" eating as the authors of Intuitive Eating put it.

How disgusting. I have in mind right now the saying, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail." I haven't really come up with an approach to losing weight, only the goal of losing weight. Now I've got something I'm going to try. I'm going to try a Novena Diet (9 days) per month that is nothing more than writing down what I eat and trying to wait for hunger. What I'm doing is focusing for a short period per month on doing what I want to become a solid habit eventually. Why would I not just dive into doing this all the time? Frankly, it is too hard.

12:30 PM: I binged. How surprising. I went back and looked at the SET guidelines and what happened when I stopped which was to eat 8 ice cream drumsticks in a few days. Maybe, just maybe, that is a good approach so long as I have a way to let the pressure off by taking Sundays off.

I am staying off the scale and off this site until October 7 when I next meet with my personal trainer. I will have maximum incentive to follow this and see if it leads to weight loss because I sure do not want to be reporting in at 220 or above. I want to be at 216 or below which is probably unrealistic at this point.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Fri Oct 02, 2015 12:43 am; edited 5 times in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Oct 02, 2015 12:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

October, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015

Weight and Step Summary
Year 1, Month 1 - June 23, 2015: 222.0; average # steps per day June 23 - June 30: 8,702
Year 1, Month 2 - July 1, 2015: 221.0; average # steps per day in July:11,659
Year 1, Month 3 - August 1, 2015: 218.6 ; average # steps per day in August: 9,960
Year 1, Month 4 - September 1, 2015: 218.6; average # steps per day in September: 8,480
Year 1, Month 5 - October 1, 2015: 218.6; average # steps per day in October: TBD
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to October 1, 2015: 3.4

Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Thursday, October 1, 2015: 218.6
Friday, October 2, 2015: 219.6
Saturday, October 3, 2015: 218.4
Sunday, October 4, 2015: 219.2
Monday, October 5, 2015:
Tuesday, October 6, 2015: 220.8
Wednesday, October 7, 2015: 219.2
Thursday, October 8, 2015:
Friday, October 9, 2015: 220.8
Saturday, October 10, 2015: 218.8
Sunday, October 11, 2015:
Monday, October 12, 2015: 219.4
Tuesday, October 13, 2015: 218.4
Wednesday, October 14, 2015: 217.8
Thursday, October 15, 2015: 219.4
Friday, October 16, 2015: 218.8
Saturday, October 17, 2015:
Sunday, October 18, 2015:
Monday, October 19, 2015: 221.2
Tuesday, October 20, 2015: 220.4
Wednesday, October 21, 2015:
Thursday, October 22, 2015: 219.4
Friday, October 23, 2015:
Saturday, October 24, 2015: 219.8
Sunday, October 25, 2015: 220.2
Monday, October 26, 2015: 220.4
Tuesday, October 27, 2015:
Wednesday, October 28, 2015: 220.4
Thursday, October 29, 2015: 221.2
Friday, October 30, 2015:
Saturday, October 31, 2015: 221.0


Journal
Thursday, October 1, 2015: 218.6
Three straight months of a first weight of 218.6. Well, it could be worse. I have decided to set aside my focus on weight loss, follow the SET guidelines, and work on returning to exercise which results in a sweat. I'm going to go on the exercise bike. Tonight, I barely made five minutes on the bike. In June, we are going to Yellowstone. I need to be in shape.

Friday, October 2, 2015: 219.6
Yesterday was McDonald's for breakfast, McDonald's for lunch, Costco rotissere chicken for dinner, and more than six hours of driving. I give myself a pass on gaining weight.

Saturday, October 3, 2015: 218.4
I decided to start using the exercise bike so that I get my heart up. It took two days to get to the point where I could go for an entire half hour.

Sunday, October 4, 2015: 219.2
I am shifting my focus from weight. Instead, I will focus on process: following the SET guidelines, walking a rolling average of 10,000 steps per day, doing my strengthening exercises, and going on the exercise bike. It took me some time to figure out what I am going to track and to add it to my exercise sheet. I'll try to get my heart rate up during 30 minutes exercise bike times, and I'll use the calorie counter as a simple way to determine heart rate. I am at about 200 calories for 30 minutes.

So -- here is the explanation for my abrupt change in direction. Over the last 6 - 12 months, I have noticed a decrease in hearing. It can be downright embarrassing like when my kids tell me my signal is still on in the van. Last Thursday, I went to an audiologist who wanted to get me into $7,000 hearing aids right away. No -- I was convinced that I had lost so much hearing for a reason and wanted to see if I could improve hearing without resorting to hearing aids.

I found out from her that my hearing loss was about the same in both ears. I had thought hearing loss might have been due to how many conference calls I was on while I was working and possible problems from that, but it turned out that was not the case. What else had changed? I went online and did searches on hearing loss improve.

What did I find? There was some indication that aerobic exercise was associated with better hearing. Well, my personal trainer had told me that I was good with 10,000 steps per day of walking. Great! I hated that exercise bike.

Looking back in my notes, I abruptly stopped tracking the bike two years ago in September, and my guess is that I have not been back on that bike at all in two years.

I hope it is not too late to salvage my hearing. I spent Thursday after the test and Friday getting myself to going on the bike 30 minutes. I cut way down on walking and have slept a lot of hours these past two days.

Hearing loss is terrible. Can you imagine walking the dog and not hearing the pitter patter of her feet? Can you imagine scratching yourself on the arm and hearing nothing? Can you imagine driving along and realizing your signal light has been on for the last two miles? Can you imagine having to ask someone to repeat what she or he said? Can you imagine walking in the woods, seeing the leaves blow, and not hearing the sound of wind rustling leaves?

I am highly motivated to see if I can exercise my way back to normal hearing. I have not had any hearing issues before about a year ago. Maybe... Maybe... I'm sure going to give this a try.

Monday, October 5, 2015:
I did not weigh myself this morning and am not sure if I am going to weigh myself until next month. I think I need to focus on process, not results: strengthening exercises, walking, exercise bike, and SET guidelines. This will not be enough for me to lose weight, so I need to add something. I reward myself by eating. This has got to stop, and I'm not sure how. Just because I clean up the kitchen does not mean I should have a hunk of cheese.

Tuesday, October 6, 2015: 220.8
I revised my tracking sheet to track days I eat only to satisfy hunger. My goal is 90% of days except Sundays.

1:30 PM: I had to go to the safety deposit box to get Tom's IDs for his new job. While there, I tried on my wedding ring which has been in there for five years. It fit. I could not believe it. I am wearing it right now.

Just in the last few months, I tried it on and there was no way it was going to stay on. I was lucky to get it off! What changed? Is it possible that my doing aerobic exercises for the last week made my finger shrink in size?

Totally bizarre. I am wearing my ring now. It is tight enough I will take it off at night, but I can wear it during the day without it hurting my finger.

I was awake since 2:45 AM, went on the exercise bike at 4:30 AM, and first got hungry at about 1 PM. Now I am no longer hungry and doubt I will be eating dinner.

2:15 PM: I did a search on "wedding" and found that I had last tried on my wedding ring on July 14, 2015 and it was way too small. I also state in that post that I had last worn it in October, 2011. My weight is not down from July 14, 2015. Could it really be aerobic exercise?

Here is from my October 4, 2011 post when I weighed 208:

"Day 1: Tuesday, October 4, 2011: This is the most I have weighed since the fall of 2008. I even had to take off my wedding ring because it was too tight. I need to return to what worked in this diet, which was the two Exception Day per month rule with "perfect compliance". I need to add to this diet, and I think what I need to add is the one plateful rule that restricts food consumption to one plate. I think I'll stick with Saturdays as N Days rather than S Days. How humbling and discouraging that I've gained so much weight so quickly. I have tried one thing that resulted in weight loss and that is the No S Diet with no snacks, no sweets, and two Exception Days per month. To lose more weight, I should add to that baseline, not change the baseline. I hope I can return to wearing my wedding ring, but it is sad that my fourth finger is actually stiff to the point that my typing is affected."

Tom comes home Thursday night and leaves Sunday. I wonder if he will notice that I am wearing my wedding ring.

Sunday, October 11, 2015:
My personal training with Kayla was one half hour long, and we got to weight in the last couple of minutes. Kayla chewed me out for not getting to my planned weight of 216 and even being above the prior month's weight.

That was not surprising. She is an accountability coach. Her reprimand did not affect me at all. What affected me was our conversation about aerobic exercise. I told her that hearing loss is associated with lack of aerobic exercise, and she said she intended fasting walking to be my aerobic exercise. I chuckled. In retrospect, I may have offended her.

I don't blame her for hearing loss, which is mostly genetics and age. I don't blame her for not knowing me as well as I know me. I chuckled because, beyond a doubt, I would not walk fast unless I could somehow measure and track it as a way to reward myself for actually doing it.

The exercise bike. Yes, I do not like going on it. BUT -- I can measure how much I am exercising. I can minimize the pain of doing it by getting up early enough to do it and then take a bath. The alarm is now set at 5:05 AM.

As for weight, I realized that no rules are applicable all the time. That leads me to looking at results and doing something to follow those results. What could I do? Fasting. On Friday, I ate during a three hour window between 4 and 7. That may be my approach, but I think that having a rumble strip weight is a good idea.

My next appointment with Kayla is the first Friday of November, and I intend to be at or below 214 by then.

Tom came home Thursday night late. He worked all day Saturday and is headed to the airport early this afternoon. I figured I'd show him that I'm able to wear my wedding ring. He was too busy to notice.

His last day for his current job is this Thursday. His next job will not require periods of time when he is working 12 hours a day and during the weekend. The last straw was our being at camp on a Saturday night where our daughter was a counselor in training, being 20 feet from a beautiful lake, and his being stuck in the cabin working for several hours.

Monday, October 12, 2015: 219.4
I hope I have seen the last of the 220s. Last night, I re purchased Brad Pilon's Eat Stop Eat. I do think you need to choose between process and results. With exercise, a focus on process is great. I have decided to go on the exercise bike 4 times per week when I am home. I have a general goal of getting to what the bike records as 200 calories expended. That is all I need.

With regard to eating, process is hard. There are tons of exception. Life does not revolve around an eating schedule. I think a focus on results may be better. I'm back to the rumble strip. My weight this month is to be 216, and I plan to make it. I will use intermittent fasting to achieve that goal. Again, I'm not sure how, but I believe I'll plan on having one window of eating per day, maybe of 1 -3 hours, until I reach that goal.

We go to my brother in law's cabin this weekend, so the fasting may be interrupted if I am not down to 216 by then, and that is just fine.

There is something intriguing to me about fasting. Every major religion emphasizes fasting. There must be something to it.

Wednesday, October 14, 2015: 217.8
The girls told me last night that I was grumpy and to stop worrying about Dad having a new job. I did not admit it but think my grumpiness is due to being told my hearing loss is permanent and to fasting. I think I was thinking fasting could help. The hearing loss is probably genetic. My sister yells into the phone and told me she has lost hearing.

I ate breakfast. My goal is to hang on to this weight through the weekend when we are visiting my brother in law's family at their cabin.

5:38 PM: I ate a lot today. I'm not sure why I ate so much, but I'm glad I ate what I wanted. I'm thinking of trying to eat more reasonably for the next several days and then weigh myself next Tuesday.

Friday, October 23, 2015: I have concluded that I need to focus on process and that I am not going to coax my weight down two pounds at a time. I need something to disrupt the continued overeating. I am back to fasting, a religious practice in most religions. The Greek Orthodox have many different types of fasts, but the standard fast is until 3 pm on Wednesdays and Fridays. In addition, orthodox women sometimes add a Monday fast.

So -- I decided to set aside looking at the scale and focus on fasting three days per week, except having a 3 hour window for eating on fast days. The fasts will be on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I will not fast on days when it would be noticed if I fast. Next Friday, for example, I am visiting a college with Katie (and Ellie in tow!).

My next personal training session is November 7, and on that day I will weigh myself.

What has happened so far? Well, I am finding that I have a stomach ache if I eat too much, which I did yesterday. My body did not adjust well from not eating much on Wednesday to eating a lot yesterday. This morning, I am having absolutely no problem with not eating.

There has been an abrupt change in exercise as well. I did not get on that exercise bike for two full years, and I have gone on it for 1/2 hour a total of 14 times this month. My goal is to go on it four times per week when I am home.

There is a big motivation for this change. I've lost some hearing, and it really bothers me. The Mayo Clinic said it is due to age and genetics. I looked at the doctor and flat out said, "I don't believe it." Two years ago, I had no noticeable hearing loss. Now I sure do. It's not terrible, but it is significant enough that I can see my dog walking on concrete and realize I am not hearing the pitter patter of her paws. I can walk in the woods and see the leaves moving gently in the wind but not hear the rustling of the leaves. There is a huge quality of life issue here.

So -- I looked online. What did I have to lose? I found three possible ways to improve hearing -- taking supplements, fasting, and aerobic exercise. Taking supplements seems likely to be a scam, so I put that aside. Fasting seems like a possibility, since hearing loss can help with inflammation and obesity can cause inflammation. The cause of my sudden hearing loss, I believe, is due to giving up aerobic exercise.

Do I blame my personal trainer for her saying walking is enough? No. Not at all. My husband told me I need to sweat, and I said I don't have to sweat -- at my age, I get enough exercise by walking. Frankly, I took the easy way out because I don't like the bike.

My daughter said I should do something else I do enjoy. Well, the bike seems like the best option because it is convenient (in the basement), I get get the biking behind me first thing in the morning, and I can bathe right away.

If I want to go on first thing in the morning, I do need to get up at 5, which is a pain. I prefer 5:30. This will work itself out over time.

Has my hearing improved? Maybe. I found an online hearing test which gives a good assessment of hearing, and it appears I may have improved in two of six tests. It is hard to tell, however. I will say, this, though: I don't want to lose any more hearing, so aerobic exercise is part of my future. Maybe I can just hold onto the hearing I now have. The reason why hearing loss occurs is due to lack of circulation of blood to the ear due to lack of aerobic exercise.

Hey -- maybe it is a blessing in disguise. Maybe I needed this quick kick to get me committed to aerobic exercise. What I have done in the past is do it for several months and then take a break and do it for several months and then take a break.

Now I will do it to avoid more hearing loss.

Looking online,
Saturday, October 24, 2015: 219.8
Yesterday, I did not eat until 6:30 pm, and I ate a fair amount but only in an hour. So -- why is my weight up .4 pounds from two days ago? Well, I must have eaten just a ton on Thursday. This is why I gave up fasting the last time: it promotes binge behavior. This time, however, I'm giving fasting a longer try because of the potential to improve hearing.

Misery is a great teacher. I ate so much I did not feel well. This morning, I ate a lot but not a ton. What stopped me when I am following no rules? Misery. I believe that fasting makes the body less able to ingest large amounts of food.

What I am going to try is fasting on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but eat if I am with other people during those times. If I am having coffee with a friend, I can just have black coffee. If I am taking Katie on a college tour and lunch is provided, I'll have lunch. The goal is to avoid revealing what I am doing and just carry on as normal. Next June, we plan to go on a two week trip to Yellowstone. By then, if I am still fasting, I'll cut back to fasting on Wednesdays and Fridays only and be open about it.

Sunday, October 25, 2015: 220.2
Misery is a wonderful teacher. I don't think my body can handle binge behavior followed by fasting: it makes me miserable. I ate a lot yesterday knowing I would not eat a lot today even though it is Sunday. The reason: I fast tomorrow and don't want to be miserable on Tuesday. Sooner or later, probably sooner, I will either stop fasting or stop way overeating.

Monday, October 26, 2015: 220.4
I'm returning to a goal of two pound per month weight loss which means I should be at 216 now and at 214 six days from now. I'm fasting every day except Friday until Sunday and will see how I do.

Tuesday, October 27, 2015: 220.8
I have gone back and forth, back and forth, on whether to focus on goal or process, keeping in mind that the two are mutually exclusive. If you focus on a goal weight, you will be changing process if you fail to make that goal. Now I am back to looking at process.

I have tried fasting because of the possibility of hearing improvement, but my 16 year old told me that I've gotten nasty, and I do believe that the change is due to fasting. It seems easy, but it also is having an impact on me that I had not realized.

I am back to the SET guidelines. The Brad Pilon book Eat Stop Eat did give me a useful bit of insight which is that calorie restriction is needed for weight loss. I always binge if I try to control portions. The nice thing about the SET guidelines is that it does result in lower food intake for the simple reason that I have to choose between eating and something else. If I want to read, I cannot eat until after I have read.

Shall I attempt to stick with this until next June? I don't know. I have plunged into using the exercise bike and have used it 1/2 hour 16 times this month. That is a lot from 0 every month for the past two years.

Maybe the exercise bike and the SET guidelines are enough for me to follow for now.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015: 220.4
I am getting off the hamster wheel. I am giving up all rules. The only thing I will do is ask my body if it wants this food. The answer will not always be positive.

My guess, in retrospect, is that my body rebelled against rules and I ate ate ate. Life ebbs away as I fool with this. And our youngest is in 9th grade.

Most positively is cooking from scratch. More positive is going on the exercise bike.

Intuitive eating. I'm not buying that book again for the 20th time.

Saturday, October 31, 2015: 221.0
I hauled Katie and Ellie to visit a college yesterday. Katie's first question to the admissions counselor was: "Are dogs allowed in dorm rooms?" She didn't believe me with the last college visit! I really don't mind that my kids tend to be immature. Kids grow up way too fast. It's nice to be home with them, and it's nice that Tom's job seems to be a good fit for him so I can stay home.

And I can look at my diet. I am doing well with going on the exercise bike, having just completed my 19th time this month, up from 0 the prior 24 months.

What I need, I think, is a simple metric for how I am doing with food, and I think I came up with one over the past two days. It's simple: the first time I eat in the day is after I get hungry. Yesterday, I had coffee in the morning and got hungry during the tour. I could survive an hour until lunch. There seems to be a war on hunger, and hunger is actually very good. Hunger is the best spice, I once read.

Now it is nearly 8 am, and I have been up since 6 and exercised for 1/2 hour. Am I hungry? No. I will wait.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Sat Oct 31, 2015 2:56 pm; edited 31 times in total
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freegirl



Joined: 08 Oct 2011
Posts: 159
Location: Toronto, Canada

PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 12:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen, thank you for sharing your journey so openly and honestly. It helped me gain insight into my own behaviour. You and I make the same mistakes:

- We focus on weight loss, not the process/ habit building
- We are perfectionists: as soon as we experience 'failure' on the plan, we either start another plan or start from day 1 on the existing one. From November 2014 you restarted 15 times. I am sure I did it even more times, I just did not write it down.

I agree with you that exercise should be the main focus. Exercise makes me emotionally stable and happier. Also, I want to focus on what my body can do, not how it looks. And I'll give No S another try. But if I had a fourth meal because I was genuinely hungry after my workout, I'll still consider it a success.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 2:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

freegirl,
I have fluctuated between process and results so many times I cannot count. Somewhere I read that those who succeed in losing weight are those who focus on health rather than a number on the scale.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Oct 31, 2015 2:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

November, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting June 23, 2015

Weight and Step Summary
Year 1, Month 1 - June 23, 2015: 222.0
Number of pounds lost from start date of June 23, 2015 to November 20, 2015: 1.0

Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Sunday, November 1, 2015: 221.6
Monday, November 2, 2015: 221.0
Tuesday, November 3, 2015: 221.2
Wednesday, November 4, 2015: 220.6
Thursday, November 5, 2015:
Friday, November 6, 2015: 221.6
Saturday, November 7, 2015:
Sunday, November 8, 2015: 218.8
Monday, November 9, 2015: 219.6
Tuesday, November 10, 2015:
Wednesday, November 11, 2015: 220.6
Thursday, November 12, 2015: 220.6
Friday, November 13, 2015:
Saturday, November 14, 2015: 219.8
Sunday, November 15, 2015:
Monday, November 16, 2015: 221.2
Tuesday, November 17, 2015: 222.2
Wednesday, November 18, 2015:221.8
Thursday, November 19, 2015: 222.2
Friday, November 20, 2015: 221.0
Saturday, November 21, 2015:
Sunday, November 22, 2015: 219.8
Monday, November 23, 2015: 219.6
Tuesday, November 24, 2015:
Wednesday, November 25, 2015: 219.0
Thursday, November 26, 2015:
Friday, November 27, 2015: 219.0
Saturday, November 28, 2015:
Sunday, November 29, 2015: 220.2
Monday, November 30, 2015: 221.2

Journal
Sunday, November 1, 2015: 221.6
I did not have a plan for weight loss. I only had a goal of two pounds per month. Now I have a plan to wait for hunger before eating for the first time in a day. Yesterday I got hungry at about 11. I ate a lot of Halloween candy. Now it is 9 and I am nowhere near hungry. Waiting for hunger does not mean pigging out after reaching it. I am not used to experiencing hunger, and this must be my objective.

7 pm: Today, I had a bagel with cream cheese and lots of Halloween candy. It's a good thing a group of teens showed up late last night so that I could dump a lot of candy on them.

Why? Why do I overeat? I considered that I eat because there is no reason not to eat. I don't eat for hunger. I eat for lots of other reasons. It's time I eat for hunger.


Monday, November 2, 2015: 221.0
I decided to rest to today because my weight ended up at a whole number. Also, I'm thinking Sunday is a day of rest so I won't wait for hunger on Sundays.

After four and a half months, I'm down one pound. Not inspiring! I've switched completely to being process-oriented, so we will see what comes of this.

Sunday, November 8, 2015: 218.8
I met with my personal trainer last week, and she pressed me on why I had given up following the SET guidelines. She said they had worked because I got down to 218. I told her they were not a good idea, and I realized why. I am better at having goals that are not constant. The pedometer seems like something that is constant, but it is not. I walk my normal amount and then add steps if I am short. The exercise bike is 4 times per week. Period. Tom wants me to increase it to five and I said I am confident I can do four but might drop to zero if I attempt five. My talk with Kayla got me back to considering fasting. I fasted for 24 hours on Friday, ending the fast at dinner time. I did not recover my appetite on Saturday and so today I am at 218.8.

At most, I'll do 24 hour fasts on Wednesdays and Fridays, following the Catholic tradition of fasting on those days. It may be that fasting affects eating on other days, and that is what I am going to find out.

Monday, November 16, 2015: 221.2
I ate way too much on the weekend. It was a preparation for this week when my plan is to fast until 6 PM on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. What is very encouraging is that I actually felt better before I stuffed myself last night. Fasting is giving me experience of what it is like to not be stuffed, and I feel better!

On Saturday, I got on the exercise bike and actually felt better after I exercised. I biked 19 times last week, and I biked 8 times this month until Saturday. That means it took 27 times of biking in order to feel good from biking.

Feeling good from fasting took much less time. Last week was an adjustment to a schedule of fasting three times per week. On Monday, I fasted until 10:30 AM; on Wednesday, until 4 PM, and on Friday, until 6 PM. I'm ready to plunge in now.

One advantage, so I have read, from low carb diets is that you don't feel that hungry when you are on them. Well, fasting is a low carb way to diet!

Wednesday, November 18, 2015:221.8
It is a good thing that Tom is out of town this week because I was awake at midnight. Something clicked for me. I gained weight despite fasting. Why? I lost some weight but then stabilized near 195 with No S Diet. Why?

It turns out that the reason is the same: I overeat to prevent the experience of hunger when I am not eating.

Gullible. I am really gullible. I sent my son an article on how North Dakota had named a landfill after Obama, and he shot back: "That has got to be a joke." Sure enough: it was!

What does being gullible have to do with being obese? Well, look at Websites like nokidhungry. For some reason, people seem to think hunger is a tragedy.

It is not. It is normal. You should try to become hungry before eating.

How about fasting? Fasting is designed to help a person deal with hunger because, on fast days, you wait until a specific time to eat and do not eat even when you become hungry. Why was fasting so bad for me? I ate so much before fasting that I never became hungry even after not eating for 24 hours.

This is sad.

What am I going to do? Well, I think I should try fasting on Wednesdays and Fridays until 6 PM if there is no social interference. I also think I should record when I experience hunger before the first time I eat each day.

So, after restlessly thinking through this, I got up at 3:30 and modified my monthly health tracking sheet so that I can now record time I become hungry.

My goal for the exercise bike is four times per week. My goal for walking is an average of 10,000 steps per day. I have a program of strengthening exercise.

What I have been missing is an easy and sustainable way to lose weight. Now what I am going to do is track when I become hungry and try to fast up to two days per week but only on Wednesday and Friday. Next week is Thanksgiving, so kids are off school and I am unlikely to fast on that Friday. Christmas and New Years fall on a Friday this year. I won't fast on those days.

That is OK.

Sunday is still a day of rest. I will not record if I become hungry on Sundays.

I feel so sad writing this out. Time after time, I have tried things that have not worked. Will this work?

I think it will, but I have thought things would work previously. Tom teased me for getting a spring/fall jacket that is too small. Well, he may be right I will never be able to wear it.

Like Edison trying to create a lightbulb, I am going to keep trying, but the foundation this time is fasting, an ancient wisdom.

Thursday, November 19, 2015: 222.2
I did not eat until 2 PM yesterday, about an hour after my stomach growled. I thought that would be good enough but it sure was not.

This morning, I considered why my exercise program is going so smoothly and my weight loss is not. With exercise, I have goals that I realized are actually upper limits. For example, I go on the exercise bike four times per week and have been able to do that faithfully since October 1. Why have I adjusted so easily? Because I allow myself not to go beyond four times. This morning, school started two hours late so the girls slept in. It would have been super easy to exercise for half hour. I didn't exercise, however, because I've already exercised three times this week and try to have no more than two days between times I go on the bike. The next time may be Saturday.

Breaks are important for me. That is why No S was so attractive.

So now what? I decided to look at the rumble strip idea once again. If I get below the rumble strip weight, I'm good. Instead of being in a panic that I have to lose 80 pounds, I can focus on losing two this month.

Do I restart? No. I return to my old plan. Rumble strip weight for November was supposed to be 214. I weighed 218.8 once earlier this month. Getting below 214 fairly soon is achievable.

How? When I started looking at losing two pounds per month, I was unclear on exactly how I was going to lose that weight. Now I have a plan. Fasting. I can fast daily until 6 PM except on Sunday and except if it interferes with socializing and except for certain holidays. I won't be fasting on Christmas.

I think I may also have a stationary fast one day per week -- Friday -- no matter what.

4:20 PM: I have not yet eaten today and will try to make it to 6 PM. So far, it has not been difficult to fast. The benefit of fasting vs. intuitive eating is that you know when the fast will end and you can eat. In contrast, with intuitive eating, you have to wait for hunger and have no idea when that will occur. How can you plan anything with intuitive eating? Fasting seems like a saner approach.

Friday, November 20, 2015: 221.0
I learned from my fasting experience earlier this week that I don't experience any discomfort or desire to eat until about 2 PM so it is best to be out of the house between 2 and 6 PM. Yesterday I was able to do that by bringing Katie to the mall.

I wolfed down a lot of food between 6 and 6:50 PM when Katie had to be brought to a school activity, and then I did not eat again. Today, I was rewarded with a weight of 221.0, down over a pound.

Is it really a pound? No. I know that. One of the frustrating aspects of trying to lose weight is you know that you didn't really lose a pound that day when the scale shows that you had. It may be there was less water in your system or that you got up slightly later.

The scale has a specific weight. If the scale is accurate, and mine is, what is recorded on the scale is the best indicator of progress that I have.

The intuitive eating approach is so attractive, but it does not seem to work for me. Hunger comes and goes. I start eating and don't seem to stop.

With fasting, I have a schedule. I can have the scale as a trigger and know that I should fast on days when the scale weight is greater than the rumble strip weight. There is a set-in-stone exception of Sundays. It is good to know that I can always eat whatever I want on Sundays.

The rest of the days I will fast with a social exception. I will not fast on Thanksgiving or Christmas.

We shall see how this goes..

I was tempted to fast three straight days since I will be home alone this weekend, but no... The first thing I would have tossed overboard was the exercise bike. What I want is a sustainable habit. Fasting until 6 PM when my weight is above the rumble strip weight is sustainable.

Saturday, November 21, 2015:
I slept in so late that I don't think that recording my weight is appropriate, but it was 218.8. Yesterday, I said something really nasty to Anne about Tommy, that he was "delusional" to think he could afford to rent an apartment next summer and still earn enough to get him through the following school year. That was way out of line, and I believe it may be due to my fasting. I ate right after that, even though it was before 6, but then I did not eat for the rest of the day.

Fasting does make me negative. I think I need to limit it even though I plan to rely on it to lose weight. Having a very modest goal to lose 2 pounds per month will help me.

Today, I weighed 4.6 pounds above my goal weight. Tomorrow I am likely to weigh more than I did today, but that is OK. I am not sure how I am going to handle next week. Maybe I will try for fasting on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, but that will be the upper limit of what I try.

4:30 PM: I ended up eating starting at 3:11 PM and ate within the hour. It is occurring to me that it might be better to set a window of time for eating that is one hour and call that a fast day.

While I am set on fasting as a way to lose weight, I still don't have the details down. Maybe I can do the following:
- Try to fast on Monday, Wednesday and Friday if I am above my rumble strip weight.
- Try to fast on Wednesday and Friday if I am at my rumble strip weight or up to two pounds below it.
- Try to fast on Friday only if I am more than two pounds below my rumble strip weight.
The approach builds a maintenance routine right into the fast.

Truth be told, I got this idea straight from an email I got this morning from Eat Stop Eat author Brad Pilon. I bought his book and now get his emails for free. He recommends tapering using 2 24-hour fasts per week, 1 24-hour and 1 20-hour fast per week, or 1 24-hour fast per week.

Because I am only looking to lose 2 pounds per month, my hope is that I don't have many weeks with 3 day fasts.

Sunday, November 22, 2015: 219.8
Getting below 220 is a good first step. I am now less than 6 pounds above my rumble strip weight. It is Thanksgiving week. I may just try to hang on to this weight during this week. I set up my tracking sheet to track three fasts (Monday, Wednesday, and Friday) by number of hours I fast. Really, it should not be too difficult to get to my rumble strip weight, which changes to 212 in a week. It is just going to take some time. I need to be realistic and let myself know it will take until January or February to get there, since I have to lose 10 pounds to make 210 in January or 12 to make 208 in February.

Monday, November 23, 2015: 219.6
I started my fast at 2:30 PM yesterday, and it is now after 12:30 PM, so I only have two more hours to go. Brad Pilon noted that there is a big difference between a 20 hour fast and a 24 hour fast. I have found that to be the case. There is close to zero difficulty in fasting for 20 hours, but the last couple of hours can be difficult. I'll be distracted this afternoon because I have to haul Ellie to an ortho appointment in a bit.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015:
I didn't weigh myself today. The girls had to get to school early. Katie had pep band tonight, so I had an early dinner with her. My Wednesday fast started at 5 tonight.

Strangely, fasting does not seem like torture. It more seems like rest. My body is resting from digestion. Something more is going on as well, but I am at a loss to describe it. There is more calmness. If I can last 24 hours without food, then a late dinner is not a problem. I am becoming less obsessed by food.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015: 219.0
There is a spiritual aspect to fasting that is not present in dieting. I don't understand it enough to say much about it. Dieting creates anxiety from start to finish: how many calories? when? how eat? It's all about control. Fasting has none of this. There is an emptiness, a silence, a calmness. It is also surprisingly easy. I don't feel any discomfort at all until about 20 hours into the fast.

What I have read is that low carb diets are popular because you don't feel hunger. Well, fasting is ultimate low carb.

Katie got a ride home last night from a kid whom she said was an atheist. Atheist -- sure. Has the kid ever listened to Bach or looked at a sunrise? I'm being somewhat dismissive, but I do wonder if atheists see anything other than screens and concrete.

Fasting is a religious experience, but why and how I do not know. It has to be experienced and cannot be explained, and I am early in experiencing it. Logically, it should be harder to eat nothing than it is to eat less than you desire, but that is not the case. There is a certain freedom in eating nothing.

Today, I thought it could be difficult to fast until dinner without being noticed, but it turns out Tom is out today, Tommy comes home at 5, and Anne is taking her younger sisters around her college. I would have eaten lunch alone, and Katie and Ellie are sleeping in because they are off school, so I would have eaten breakfast alone as well, hours before they got out of bed. It is hard on teenagers to get up early for school, so they take advantage of a day like today to sleep in.

I think I should fast without telling anyone at least for a period of time, but I'm not sure why. It will be easy to fast without anyone noticing today. Friday may be trickier, but we may have a relaxed schedule on Friday with people doing what they want until dinner.

Thursday, November 26, 2015:
I did not get up until 8:30 AM and weighed in at 217.8. I won't record the weight because I usually weigh myself before 6 AM. I did fast until 5 PM but did not overeat as much as I have after other fasts. I get full faster.

My personal trainer had asked me to describe my relationship with food, and I have thought about that question. It is full of anxiety. Fasting is calming. I fast for 24 hours and then eat what I want.

7 PM: So, so odd. My sister in law is a terrific cook, but I only really enjoyed the salad that my niece made. Why? I think fasting may make it so food does not taste good unless you are actually hungry.

I am not restricting myself at all in eating except for my three 24-hour fasts, but I did not eat a whole lot today.

Friday, November 27, 2015: 219.0
I fasted for 24 hours, from 3:30 PM yesterday to 3:30 PM today, and in 15 minutes had 1/2 peanut butter sandwich, lentil soup, yogurt, eggnog, and chocolate. Now I am stuffed.

Is there a point to this? I think so. I need to stick it out. Fasting gives me an understanding of when I am hungry and when I am not, and it teaches me that I can tolerate hunger, that I won't faint or bend over in extreme pain.

9 PM: Ugh! I ate way too much after 3:30 PM today and don't even want to weigh myself tomorrow. I think I need to change my period of fasting so it ends at 6 PM.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

December, 2015: The Blessings of Simplicity starting December 20, 2015

Weight Summary
Year 1, Month 1 - December 20, 2015: 221.0
Year 1, Month 1 - December 20, 2015: 221.0
Number of pounds lost from start date of December 20, 2015 to December 2, 2015:0

Weight Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Tuesday, December 1, 2015:
Wednesday, December 2, 2015: 220.4
Thursday, December 3, 2015: 221.0
Friday, December 4, 2015: 220.4
Saturday, December 5, 2015: 219.6
Sunday, December 6, 2015:
Monday, December 7, 2015:
Tuesday, December 8, 2015: 219.6
Wednesday, December 9, 2015: 220.6
Thursday, December 10, 2015: 219.4
Friday, December 11, 2015:
Saturday, December 12, 2015: 219.2
Sunday, December 13, 2015:
Monday, December 14, 2015: 217.8
Tuesday, December 15, 2015: 219.6
Wednesday, December 16, 2015: 218.8
Thursday, December 17, 2015:
Friday, December 18, 2015:
Saturday, December 19, 2015:
Sunday, December 20, 2015: 221.0
Monday, December 21, 2015: 218.6
Tuesday, December 22, 2015: 218.2
Wednesday, December 23, 2015: 217.6
Thursday, December 24, 2015: 218.0
Friday, December 25, 2015: 220.2
Saturday, December 26, 2015: 218.8
Sunday, December 27, 2015:
Monday, December 28, 2015:
Tuesday, December 29, 2015:
Wednesday, December 30, 2015:
Thursday, December 31, 2015:


Journal
Tuesday, December 1, 2015:
I successfully fasted for 3 24-hour periods last week -- but gained weight! It was a shock to me. I fasted from one 3:30 PM to the next which gave me plenty of time after 3:30 PM to have more than a day's worth of calories before I went to bed. It seems to me that fasting for me is best done with an ending point after 6 PM.

So -- I looked at what I could do, and I decided the only way I could fast like that is if I backed off on exercise.

That did not seem smart to me. I've gone back and forth, back and forth, between a focus on process and a focus on results, and so I decided this month to weigh myself once -- on December 3 which is the day I meet with my personal trainer.

Other than that, I am focusing on process: going on the exercise bike four times per week, walking an average of 10,000 steps per day, and doing strengthening exercises. As for controlling what I eat, I am returning to the SET guidelines:
1) Sit down.
2) Eat without distraction.
3) Take hand or utensil away from mouth while chewing and swallowing.

There is one overarching rule which is that I do not restrict my food intake. Yesterday, Ellie got granola bars, and I had one with her in the car. She was hungry. Normally, I do not allow the kids to eat in the car, but I joined her. Driving is something of a distraction, but I ate anyway because following the SET guidelines at that point would have meant not joining her. I did take the rest of the granola bar away from my mouth while chewing and swallowing.

Where did I get the idea that this might help? Well, the original SET guidelines are from a long out of print book called "The 7 Habits of Slim People". What gave me the idea that this might actually help was a youtube video by a Dr. Robert Lustig who had as one of his recommendations to wait 20 minutes after eating before eating again because your stomach needs time to process food and send the signal that it is not hungry.

There is a more practical aspect to this, however. I had the Wall Street Journal in front of me when I started to eat this morning, and I was in something of a rush because it snowed last night and I needed to shovel. There I was, faced with a choice between eating and reading. I did both, sequentially and not concurrently, because I was not so interested in eating that I would give up at least reading the editorial page.

I think it will help to create the habit of following these eating guidelines, and perhaps it is enough for this month of feasting to simply focus on following them.

Every time I weigh myself, there is the opportunity to change course. That is mostly why I want to stay off the scale and just focus on following those eating guidelines.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015: 220.4
At what point do you stop and say "I'm done. I'm starting a new life."

Thursday, December 3, 2015: 221.0
I am making a new start and am going to follow the SET guidelines all the time, including on Sundays. This needs to be a habit. Will it result in my eating less? Yes, I am sure of that. I pair eating with other activities. If forced to choose, at least some times I will choose the other activity.

Friday, December 4, 2015: 220.4
I spent the day with Katie today, and we had a long discussion on habits. She does not like the idea of habits because then you are not intentional in what you do. She said that she agrees it is good to make a decision and stick with it but then you need to be intentional every time you do it.

Saturday, December 5, 2015: 219.6
I gave her an example. Say, Dad and I decide to save $500 per paycheck. We have three options for how we will save:
1. We set up our accounts so that $500 automatically goes into savings.
2. Every payday, I go online and transfer $500 from checking to savings.
3. Every payday, we discuss and decide to transfer $500 from checking to savings.

She said that you don't need a habit in order to do something automatically. True. Option 1 isn't a habit. You set up automatic withdrawal, and the computer does the rest. Option 2 is a habit. Option 3 is not. She would choose option 3. She would want to be consciously looking at the activity every single time she did it.

I told her I think we would save less with option 3 vs. 2 and would save the most with option 1.

Now how does this relate to my eating? I think I may have had difficulty with the SET guidelines because I took Sundays off and so did not allow this habit to become ingrained.

10 AM: Precious! I just drove Katie and Ellie to work and continued the conversation on habit. Since Katie said she did not want to talk about it, I first asked permission.

I told her I have the habit of doing exercises every day. I don't decide each day if I am going to do them. Instead, I do them. The time to evaluate my exercises is when I have an hour-long personal training session once per month.

I then asked about the difference between habit and doing something having decided to do it for a period of time. She said that she wanted to debate whether to do something every single time. Ellie piped up and asked about what is the point of debating whether to brush your teeth. Katie said she actually thought at one point that toothpaste was bad for you because your breath is so different after brushing your teeth, but she did not answer Ellie's question directly.

So -- she did answer my question. She did want to decided every day if she wanted to do something every day. And then she wanted to end the conversation.

Ellie, in the back, piped up and said, "How ironic. You don't want to have habits because you want to debate whether to do something, but you don't want to debate about habits."

True.

Looking at my weight situation, I think I have used weight as a point of decision. What is dumb about that is weight fluctuates naturally. A pound one way or the other indicates nothing.

Harvey Mackay, in this week's column, had something to say about focusing on results rather than process, about changing based on today's weight.

Here is the start of his column:
"Last spring I was playing a great game of golf. I stood on the 18th tee, and with a birdie on the par 5 final hole, I would shoot an even par 72. I pulled out my driver one last time. Having hit 13 good drives in a row, I was super excited about telling all my friends . . . until I hooked my tee shot into the woods and wound up with a double bogey and a 75.

Now I would take a three-over par final score any day of the week, but I was extremely disappointed with the way it happened because I knew I choked. So I called my good friend Lou Holtz and asked him for his definition of choking.

Lou said: Choking is when you are concentrating on the result and not focusing on the execution"

Perfect.

I am not sure how Katie makes a decision, but it seems to me a huge use of willpower to decide every single day what you are going to do.

For example, I decided to go on the exercise bike 4 times per week. Today is Saturday, and I have gone on it three times. I need to go on it a fourth time today.

If I relied on my feelings right now, I would not go on the bike. I have already decided, however, to go on the bike four times, and I have a personal trainer who will be reviewing what I do.

So -- time to go on the bike, especially since the girls are at work right now.

And the time to decide about following the SET guidelines is also during a personal training session and not every single time I eat.

Sunday, December 6, 2015:
I got up way too late today to weight myself.

Tuesday, December 8, 2015: 219.6
I had my monthly hour long session with my personal trainer today, and I started off with weight, telling her it was now my highest priority. She had asked me last time to consider my relationship with food, and today I answered with one word: "nerve wracking". Why? No idea. Maybe it is because of the years of restriction.

Whatever the reason, I told her that I intend to follow the SET guidelines through June of next year and think this will lead to some weight loss because I do so much eating paired with other activities. Now I will have to choose: do I want to read The Wall Street Journal, or do I want to eat?

I told her that, when I started working with her two years ago, I was so weak I could not do a bridge. She had me do pelvic tilts. I then worked up to bridges and heel taps. Well, the SET guidelines are like pelvic tilts: they are the foundation for good eating.

I cannot binge eat following the guidelines because, by definition, binge eating is fast eating. You cannot eat fast if you are taking hand or utensil away from mouth while eating and chewing.

My intent is to focus on building this foundation but then perhaps add to it after June of next year. Between now and June, my goal is to follow the guidelines, even on Sunday, and work on cooking. That is it. Today I made chicken noodle soup. It was good.

The SET guidelines come from the book "The 7 Secrets of Slim People" by Vikki Hansen and Shawn Goodman, copyright 1997.

SET Guidelines:
1. Sit down:
from page 84" "To become more conscious of your eating: Sit down -- even if it is one bite of ice cream - take the spoon and sit down. If you taste while you are cooking, go to a chair and sit down to taste."

2. Eat without distraction:
from page 84: "Do not eat and read, eat and watch TV, eat and drive, or eat and do anything else at the same time. You cannot become conscious while distracted."

3. Take hand or utensil away from mouth while chewing and swallowing:
from page 86: "You may tend to eat automatically. Once you get your hands on a fork, the hand-to-mouth action doesn't end until the food is all gone. In order to be aware and take more pleasure in your food (not to slow you down so you eat less), put your fork down after each bite, and do not pick it up again until after your mouth is empty."

Wednesday, December 9, 2015: 220.6
I have often thought that the hallmark of a successful diet is not that you use willpower to resist overeating but that you no longer want to overeat. Yesterday, I think, was the turning point already in following the SET guidelines. Yesterday, I took breaks in all-day cooking to sit down and eat, but the experience was distasteful.

Today, I have almost an aversion to eating that much. I love apples but only had two slices.

What keeps coming to my mind is the word "rest". I need to rest. If I overeat due to stress, that makes sense. So -- I think I'll pass on all my exercise except for the strengthening exercises through the holiday season and just focus on the SET guidelines and the strengthening exercises. I'll put away my pedometer and not have a goal of 4X per week on the exercise bike.

My body is stressed due to all the extra weight. It needs to go. I need to relax. One of my favorite books is "How to Stop Worry and Start Living", and I'm rereading it.

Yes, Tommy may need to take a term off because his priority seems to be gaming. Yes, Tom is in a new job that may or may not be long term. Yes, yes, yes...

What can I do today? The first chapter of the book is "Live in day-tight compartments." In other words, figure out what you can do today, do it, and don't worry about all the "what ifs" of the future.


Thursday, December 10, 2015: 219.4
I'm concluding that the root of my weight problem is stress, and trying to restrict how much and what I eat was a counterproductive approach because it is stressful to restrict eating.

Last night, briefly, I decided to fast today, and then I immediately ate without following the SET guidelines. I think fasting is not appropriate for me until I have the SET guidelines as habits.

Sunday, December 13, 2015:
I got up at 8:30 AM and weighed in at 217.6. I did not record the weight because I got up so late. In the past week, I have made two changes: I have backed off on exercise so as to focus energy on developing the SET habits, and I have been following a recommendation for hearing improvement that came off Facebook but was confirmed as harmless from WebMD. I am having a mixture of 1/2 teaspoon of Ceylon organic cinnamon and 1/2 teaspoon of honey in hot water in the morning and at night.

One good thing about having the Mayo Clinic tell you your hearing loss is irreversible and genetic is I can try different things. Maybe it is. It's not terrible now, and every time I talk with my older sister on the phone I know genetics is at play because we talk loudly to each other.

The combination of Ceylon cinnamon and honey is supposed to help with weight loss as well which is why I am mentioning it. Also, you need to make sure it is Ceylon cinnamon (available at Whole Foods) since too much of the more common cinnamon (like McCormicks) can cause liver damage.

Monday, December 14, 2015: 217.8
How bizarre. I think the weight loss may more be due to having Ceylon cinnamon and honey twice a day than to following the SET habits. It's hard to tell. I looked for the Facebook posting that alerted me to the possibility of Ceylon cinnamon and honey helping me to improve my hearing, but I could not find it. I believe I saw it less than two weeks ago and found the article on the importance of using Ceylon cinnamon about a week ago.

McCormicks confirmed it uses cassia cinnamon only which you do not want to use because it can cause liver damage.

It's possible my hearing is improving, but I am using an online test (myhearingtest.net) that is too crude for me to be sure. There will have to be significant hearing improvement in order for me to be sure.

9 AM: OK, I found the post which was from December 3. Here it is: "I have had more requests for this so I am re-posting it for y'all!!!! The first time I posted it received over 50,000 shares.
Great information!!

Cinnamon and RAW Honey...!

Drug companies won't like this one getting around.
Facts on RAW Honey and Cinnamon:
It is found that a mix of honey and cinnamon CURES most diseases. Honey is produced in most of the countries of the world. Scientists of today also note honey as very effective medicine for all kinds of diseases. Honey can be used without side effects which is also a plus.
HEART DISEASES: Make a paste of honey and cinnamon powder, put it on toast instead of jelly and jam and eat it regularly for breakfast. It reduces the cholesterol and could potentially save one from heart attack. Also, even if you have already had an attack studies show you could be kept miles away from the next attack. Regular use of cinnamon honey strengthens the heart beat. In America and Canada, various nursing homes have treated patients successfully and have found that as one ages the arteries and veins lose their flexibility and get clogged; honey and cinnamon revitalize the arteries and the veins.

ARTHRITIS: Arthritis patients can benefit by taking one cup of hot water with two tablespoons of honey and one small teaspoon of cinnamon powder. When taken daily even chronic arthritis can be cured. In a recent research conducted at the Copenhagen University, it was found that when the doctors treated their patients with a mixture of one tablespoon Honey and half teaspoon Cinnamon powder before breakfast, they found that within a week (out of the 200 people so treated) practically 73 patients were totally relieved of pain -- and within a month, most all the patients who could not walk or move around because of arthritis now started walking without pain.

BLADDER INFECTIONS: Take two tablespoons of cinnamon powder and one teaspoon of honey in a glass of lukewarm water and drink it. It destroys the germs in the bladder....who knew?

CHOLESTEROL: Two tablespoons of honey and three teaspoons of Cinnamon Powder mixed in 16 ounces of tea water given to a cholesterol patient was found to reduce the level of cholesterol in the blood by 10 percent within two hours. As mentioned for arthritic patients, when taken three times a day, any chronic cholesterol-could be cured. According to information received in the said Journal, pure honey taken with food daily relieves complaints of cholesterol.

COLDS: Those suffering from common or severe colds should take one tablespoon lukewarm honey with 1/4 spoon cinnamon powder daily for three days. This process will cure most chronic cough, cold, and, clear the sinuses, and it's delicious too!

UPSET STOMACH: Honey taken with cinnamon powder cures stomach ache and also is said to clear stomach ulcers from its root.

GAS: According to the studies done in India and Japan, it is revealed that when Honey is taken with cinnamon powder the stomach is relieved of gas.

IMMUNE SYSTEM: Daily use of honey and cinnamon powder strengthens the immune system and protects the body from bacterial and viral attacks. Scientists have found that honey has various vitamins and iron in large amounts. Constant use of Honey strengthens the white blood corpuscles (where DNA is contained) to fight bacterial and viral diseases.

INDIGESTION: Cinnamon powder sprinkled on two tablespoons of honey taken before food is eaten relieves acidity and digests the heaviest of meals.

INFLUENZA: A scientist in Spain has proved that honey contains a natural 'Ingredient' which kills the influenza germs and saves the patient from flu.

LONGEVITY: Tea made with honey and cinnamon powder, when taken regularly, arrests the ravages of old age. Use four teaspoons of honey, one teaspoon of cinnamon powder, and three cups of boiling water to make a tea. Drink 1/4 cup, three to four times a day. It keeps the skin fresh and soft and arrests old age. Life spans increase and even a 100 year old will start performing the chores of a 20-year-old.

RASPY OR SORE THROAT: When throat has a tickle or is raspy, take one tablespoon of honey and sip until gone. Repeat every three hours until throat is without symptoms.

PIMPLES: Three tablespoons of honey and one teaspoon of cinnamon powder paste. Apply this paste on the pimples before sleeping and wash it off the next morning with warm water. When done daily for two weeks, it removes all pimples from the root.

SKIN INFECTIONS:Applying honey and cinnamon powder in equal parts on the affected parts cures eczema, ringworm and all types of skin Infections.

WEIGHT LOSS:Daily in the morning one half hour before breakfast and on an empty stomach, and at night before sleeping, drink honey and cinnamon powder boiled in one cup of water. When taken regularly, it reduces the weight of even the most obese person. Also, drinking this mixture regularly does not allow the fat to accumulate in the body even though the person may eat a high calorie diet.

FATIGUE: Recent studies have shown that the sugar content of honey is more helpful rather than being detrimental to the strength of the body. Senior citizens who take honey and cinnamon powder in equal parts are more alert and flexible. Dr. Milton, who has done research, says that a half tablespoon of honey taken in a glass of water and sprinkled with cinnamon powder, even when the vitality of the body starts to decrease, when taken daily after brushing and in the afternoon at about 3:00 P.M., the vitality of the body increases within a week.

BAD BREATH: People of South America, gargle with one teaspoon of honey and cinnamon powder mixed in hot water first thing in the morning so their breath stays fresh throughout the day.

HEARING LOSS: Daily morning and night honey and cinnamon powder, taken in equal parts restores hearing."

There is no mention here of the type of cinnamon needed, but it appears based on other Internet research I did, to be critical that it is Ceylon and not cassia cinnamon.

7:30 PM: This is information from WebMD:
"Cinnamon
Cinnamon is best known as a spice, sprinkled on toast and lattes. But extracts from the bark of the cinnamon tree have also been used traditionally as medicine throughout the world.

Why do people take cinnamon?

Some research has found that a particular type of cinnamon, cassia cinnamon, may lower blood sugar in people with diabetes. However, other studies have not found a benefit. Studies of cinnamon for lowering cholesterol and treating yeast infections in people with HIV have been inconclusive.

Lab studies have found that cinnamon may reduce inflammation, have antioxidant effects, and fight bacteria. But its unclear what the implications are for people.

For now, studies have been mixed, and its unclear what role cinnamon may play in improving health.

How much cinnamon should you take?

Because cinnamon is an unproven treatment, there is no established dose. Some recommend 1/2 to 1 teaspoon (2-4 grams) of powder a day. Some studies have used between 1 gram and 6 grams of cinnamon. Very high doses may be toxic.

Can you get cinnamon naturally from foods?

Cinnamon is an additive to countless foods. When purchased in the store, common spice cinnamon could be one of two types or a mixture of both. It is either "true" or Ceylon cinnamon, which is easier to grind but thought to be less effective for diabetes. Or, and more likely, it could be the darker-colored cassia cinnamon.

What are the risks of taking cinnamon?

Side effects. Cinnamon usually causes no side effects. Heavy use of cinnamon may irritate the mouth and lips, causing sores. In some people, it can cause an allergic reaction. Applied to the skin, it might cause redness and irritation.
Risks. Very high quantities of cassia cinnamon may be toxic, particularly in people with liver problems. Because cinnamon may lower blood sugar, people with diabetes may need to adjust their treatment if they use cinnamon supplements. An ingredient in some cinnamon products, coumarin, may cause liver problems. Given the lack of evidence about its safety, cinnamon -- as a treatment -- is not recommended for children or for women who are pregnant or breastfeeding.
Interactions. If you take any medication regularly, talk to your doctor before you start using cinnamon supplements. They could interact with antibiotics, diabetes drugs, blood thinners, heart medicines, and others."

Tuesday, December 15, 2015: 219.6
Yesterday, I thought the combination of honey and cinnamon was all I needed, so I let go of the SET habits. Dumb. I'm back to them today. Minor detour.

8 PM: I revised my tracking sheet and now I think I'm ready to return to walking and aerobic exercise. Since Tommy will be home for Christmas break, I'm going to the gym to an elliptical machine. Four times per week.

What I want to do is focus on habits and not worry about results. Maybe I'll weigh myself. Maybe I won't.

Wednesday, December 16, 2015: 218.8
I was going to head to the gym after dropping the girls off at school but changed my mind. I keep on thinking that losing weight is stressful and I need to rest as much as possible. This is the opposite of what is generally proposed which is to increase exercise.

7 PM: I really debated today about what to do with exercise and as a result let go of following the SET habits. Now I think how I need to look at this is that I have a higher priority for weight loss than aerobic exercise and need to concentrate on that. I may try gentle yoga but will let go of walking 10,000 steps and 1/2 hour of exercise bike 4 X per week.

Thursday, December 17, 2015:
I decided against weighing myself today and am not sure how much I am going to focus on my health the next couple of weeks when Tom is not traveling, the older two are home from college, and the younger two are off school. This might be an ideal time just to drop everything non critical and nail down the SET habits.

They are hard to follow! I can eat as much as I want whenever and wherever I want. If it would be awkward to follow them, I don't have to! For example, at Costco, I'm not going to sit down to have a taste test. That's OK!

So why are they so hard to follow? I think I know the reason, which is that eating following those SET habits does not meet a need that is met when I eat fast and mindlessly. It's almost a stress release to eat that way, and now I will need to find a different stress release. I'm going to try gentle yoga at the gym.

No pedometer. No exercise bike.

Priorities. My job fell off the family priority list for perhaps three years. I think the exercise may fall off the personal priority list until my weight is down.

It strikes me that this would be the opposite of whatever a personal trainer would suggest. I'm going on instinct. By ladelling on all this exercise, I've been able to talk myself out of focusing on following the SET habits which I believe will lead to weight loss.

I'll still continue the strengthening exercises, but that is it.


Sunday, December 20, 2015: 221.0
Last night, we had a wonderful dinner out with another couple at their country club, and I decided beforehand this would be my last night of eating without hunger. I simply have to do it. I have to go from never eating with hunger to always eating with hunger. It will be a dive in. Is this such a good idea just a few days before Christmas? Yes. I actually could start anytime. I simply have needed to make the decision.

I did it once, over a Memorial Day weekend, and I was literally shocked by how little I ate. Over the next two weeks, no one will be in school, and Tom will not be traveling for work, so the pace will be more relaxed.

But the fact is that I have to dive in sometime, and my life slips by as I debate what to do about my weight and flit from one thing to another. It's patently obvious the only way I am going to be the appropriate weight is if I only eat to satisfy hunger.

Trust. I think that is my problem. I don't trust food will be available when I am hungry. It seems absurd to reach that conclusion, but our society has taught us that hunger is a crises.

For some reason, I keep on getting nokidhungry.com pop ups, and it's irritating to see their mission as to "end child hunger." We have an obesity crises in this country, and no wonder -- kids need to become hungry before they eat.

I am a smart, highly-educated woman, and I got caught up in this stupidity because I am gullible. Years ago, I recognized that obesity is related to gullibility, but I did not know why. I came to recognize the connection.

What is new now? Gullible people tend to become distrusting because they were talked into believing things that were absurdly untrue. I actually sent my son an article that a landfill in ND was named after Obama and he quickly replied that this had to be a joke. I thought it was funny, but I also thought it was true.

The distrust extended to my own body. I need to trust my body to tell me when it is hungry. The distrust extended to whether food would be available when I needed it.

It is Christmas week, a wonderful time to trust, a wonderful time to enjoy my family.

1 PM: Last night, I left a couple of bites of chocolate cheesecake on the plate because I was so stuffed that it would have been painful to eat more. The book Intuitive Eating has a term called "last bite threshold", and I was reminded of it as I looked at the last of the third dessert. I think that the human being needs to finish eating when there is some sort of indicator for "I'm done." If you start eating when you are hungry, the "I'm done" indicator goes off when you are satisfied -- not hungry, not full, not stuffed, just neutral. If you start eating when you are not hungry, the "I'm done" indicator goes off when you are stuffed, as I was last night.

I may not eat at all today. I'm certainly not yet hungry. In fact, I can still feel food in my belly. It was a wonderful way to say good-bye to overeating.

Monday, December 21, 2015: 218.6
Katie comes home today from Florida. Tom headed off to work. Tommy heads off to work at 11. Anne has her last final this morning. Only Ellie has no plans, so she will help me with last minute shopping.

I had an interesting experience last night. I did not feel any hunger until we were at the table. Neither Tommy nor I were eating because Tommy had gotten dinner while at work, free. I then felt hungry and so I ate.

An hour later, I tried out popcorn balls Ellie had been making and then ate and ate: cheese and yogurt and more popcorn balls.

Yeah, no.... The problem with eating only when hungry is your body can decide it is hungry and even growl when food is present.

I am thinking I should have looked to religious tradition instead of buying into current scientific thinking. Religious tradition is fasting which is based on objective measures like time of day.

As much as I can for the next four days, I'm going to try to fast until dinner and then just eat within a one hour window.

I am determined that I have seen the last of 220 on the scale.

9 PM: There is nothing like going through family pictures to see the impact of excess weight on my life. I was going to wait until 6 PM to eat but then had some vitamin pills and decided it might be bad to have them on an empty stomach. As a result, I ate but only in a one hour window, and I skipped dinner.

What do I do? Do I just decide to eat in a one hour window each day until I have lost the weight. I am not sure how to proceed as of yet, but tomorrow I will only eat within a one hour window. Christmas is Christmas: I'm not fasting on that day.

Tuesday, December 22, 2015: 218.2
I did not eat between about 2:30 PM yesterday and 6 PM tonight, and it was easy. Fasting is easy, contrary to popular opinion.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015: 217.6
Busy day. I went through 1/4 tank of gas running kids to work, school, and party plus grocery shopping. Did I feel any hunger? No. It is 4 pm right now.

9 PM: Tom and I took Anne out to dinner since the other children were out. We got home at 6:15, and sadly I ate and ate. I think I need to take a halt to fasting until Monday, giving my body some time to recover from four days of fasting.

Thursday, December 24, 2015: 218.0
I found the limit of what I could do -- three days of fasting at a time. That is good. It is Christmas Eve. All I have to do as far is eating is not be stupid. This morning, I had yogurt and an apple for breakfast. That was a good start.

Saturday, December 26, 2015: 218.8
I ate a lot yesterday, too. I decided to follow the SET habits as a way to maintain the weight lost through fasting.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Fri Jan 01, 2016 2:35 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Jan 01, 2016 2:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

January, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
January 21, 2016: 223.0
January 21, 2016: 223.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Friday, January 1, 2016: 222.0
Saturday, January 2, 2016: 221.6
Sunday, January 3, 2016:
Monday, January 4, 2016: 222.6
Tuesday, January 5, 2016: 222.2
Wednesday, January 6, 2016: 222.0
Thursday, January 7, 2016: 223.0
Friday, January 8, 2016:
Saturday, January 9, 2016: 221.6
Sunday, January 10, 2016: 221.8
Monday, January 11, 2016: 222.8
Tuesday, January 12, 2016:
Wednesday, January 13, 2016:
Thursday, January 14, 2016: 223.0
Friday, January 15, 2016: 222.0
Saturday, January 16, 2016:
Sunday, January 17, 2016: 222.8
Monday, January 18, 2016: 224.2
Tuesday, January 19, 2016: 221.6
Wednesday, January 20, 2016: 223.0
Thursday, January 21, 2016: 223.0
Friday, January 22, 2016: 224.2
Saturday, January 23, 2016:
Sunday, January 24, 2016:
Monday, January 25, 2016:
Tuesday, January 26, 2016:
Wednesday, January 27, 2016:
Thursday, January 28, 2016:
Friday, January 29, 2016:
Saturday, January 30, 2016:
Sunday, January 31, 2016:


Journal
Friday, January 1, 2016: 222.0
I realized that I have been not serious enough about weight loss, playing around the edges, wanting but not wanting enough. You don't lose 90 pounds by making minor changes. My life needs an overhaul.

I get tangled up in things I cannot control and things that aren't important. My life does need to be simplified.

So I let go and ate what I wanted. I ended up at exactly the weight I started on June 23.

So be it. I also looked at what I was doing. We are under some financial strain going to one income, to the point that we are living paycheck to paycheck. What is the most obvious thing to do? Write down what we spend. Have I done that? Yes, off and on. I set up a system, tested it, and then let it drop to today.

Yesterday, I was telling Tom that Katie is a big hole in our budget because she always wants the best. Her $170 boots from Nordstroms are in for repair, and so now she is using my Sorel boots that I purchased when I was single. She doesn't take care of things.

So -- I created a category called "Katie Clothing". I was explaining this to Tom yesterday when Katie was listening, and her response was "If it starts tomorrow, we still have a few hours."

Laughable, yes, for a teenage girl who wants to get nice things from Mom and Dad. I have used the exact same approach with eating. January 1 is the start, so now I eat what I want.

What is my plan?
1. Write down what I eat. It is a pain. It cannot be exact because I am not measuring out food. It will help me to understand where the calories are finding their way into my body, just like writing down what I spend has made me realize I get talked into way too much Katie clothing.
2. Follow the SET habits. They do help because they make me realize I am eating.
3. Use the pedometer with a goal of 10,000 steps per day.
4. Try to do aerobic exercises four times per week.
5. Continue strengthening exercises twice per day.

I am going to try to improve my eating habits by cooking more, having more salads, etc.

Work is on the back burner. Tom needs me home. When your kids are in school, being a stay at home Mom is really part time work. The first focus will be my family; the second focus will be my health.

Saturday, January 2, 2016: 221.6
I am not writing down what I eat. It seems to have a backlash effect.

Since September, I have slept through the night exactly once. My hearing got bad so quickly I went to two audiologists, one at Mayo. Both said the hearing loss was permanent and genetic. I flat out told the Mayo doctor: "I don't believe it."

Since then, I developed tinnitus, which is an annoying ringing in my ear. Both audiologists assumed I had it, and I did not.

So -- I launched into trying to figure out what was wrong with me. I was interested in fasting more because of the possibility that something was causing all these problems and a fast could clean out my system.

Now I think I know the problem and the solution. What has helped is a book called "The Magnesium Miracle" and my own testing out of what to have. The only National Institutes of Health study which shows hearing improvement is one involving magnesium.

There are many different forms of magnesium, and I'm on my third type: magnesium glycinate. I split 200 mg pills into two so I could take 100 mg at a time. That is what I did yesterday.

Magnesium is what is used to treat chronic fatigue syndrome. Stress can cause a sudden depletion of magnesium, and we had a lot of stress this past year. Also, magnesium can be less effective if you take calcium or vitamin D, which I have not but I still drink a lot of milk and have a lot of yogurt.

Has my hearing improved? It seems to be improving back to where it was earlier this fall. I can hear two sounds on myhearing.net that I could not hear a month ago but could hear in September. My hope is that my hearing continues to improve because it is very socially isolating to not be able to hear.

Last night, I only awoke briefly and was back to sleep within a few minutes. It was the second best night of sleep I've had since September.

What about my weight? My weight may be a symptom of magnesium deficiency. I will follow the SET habits and I will rebuild back my exercise routine.

And, at age 57, I have learned a valuable lesson to never take my health for granted.

Cinnamon, by the way, has a lot of magnesium in it. I started experimenting due to a Facebook posting from the mother of a friend of Katie's.

Wednesday, January 6, 2016: 222.0
The saying "crossing the Rubicon "comes to mind for me. This is the definition from Wikipedia: "The idiom "Crossing the Rubicon" means to pass a point of no return, and refers to Julius Caesar's army's crossing of the Rubicon River in 49 BC, which was considered an act of insurrection and treason. Julius Caesar uttered the famous phrase "alea iacta est"the die is castas his army marched through the shallow river."

I tried losing weight slowly and slowly adjusting what I was doing, with the image of my mind of coaxing my weight down like coaxing a dog downstairs. It did not work. I am at exactly the same weight as I was in June.

I need a lifestyle overhaul and think that the core of it all is to eat only when hungry. My objection to that approach has been that I would inconvenience people. Well, it is not true. What inconveniences people is the oft promoted idea that you need to eat as soon as you are hungry. No, you do not. You can eat as soon after getting hungry as is convenient.

Thursday, January 7, 2016: 223.0
I have my monthly personal training session with Kayla on Monday, and I am tempted to reschedule? Why? I told her that I was going to fast and predicted I would weigh about 210 by next week.

Well, fasting was not just a failure: it was a spectacular failure. I circled back to trying to eat only when hungry and even tried one day of writing down what I eat.

The nice thing about having a personal trainer is she can point out the obvious to you. She told me the only thing that seems to work with me is following the SET habits.

She's right. I'll tell her next week that she is right. I will follow the SET habits starting today. I'm also going to work on stress reduction techniques, such as by using a sauna. I just got back from using the sauna for 1/2 hour.

One parenting saying I have developed is "Some things are best learned the hard way." Well, that applies to me, too.

Monday, January 11, 2016: 222.8
It was tempting to cancel my personal training today, but I went ahead and faced the music. Fasting did not work. We set goals: continue strengthening exercises, try one YMCA class, and follow the SET habits. That's it. I will focus on following the SET habits, day in and day out, with no exception on Sundays.

Why? As we discussed, eating in that way does not satisfy a need that is met by eating fast. What it is I do not know. We speculated that it is stress-related.

Wednesday, January 13, 2016:
Personal training can be helpful for having me talk out loud. Yesterday, I thought back to my conversation with Kayla and how I had said my sense of hunger and fullness is intact, except I also used a qualifier like "fully" or "wholly" or "entirely". Huh. I can actually eat according to hunger and fullness.

What I've been telling myself is that I have somewhat lost that sense of hunger and fullness as I have ignored it and eaten for reasons of stress.

Now I know what I need to do.

Thursday, January 14, 2016: 223.0
Ugh. I learned quickly this was not the way to go. "Virtue is a habit", and habits are not goals: they are processes which can be followed. Back to SET habits. Back to walking. "Some lessons are best learned the hard way." I hope I've learned my lesson.

Friday, January 15, 2016: 222.0
Last night, I was reading through a book that my daughter had gotten at school when the author of "Surviving the Angel of Death", a Holocaust survivor, came to speak. At one point, Nazis fired into a group of people, including her, and she woke up thinking she was dead. She felt the person next to her who was cold, realized she was warm, and was happy that she was alive! She had fainted so they thought she was alive.

We don't have stress anywhere near that, and yet I am 90 pounds overweight. I realized that I need to be the one to calm down no matter what is going on around me, and certainly I am not in fear of death as was that little 10 year old girl.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016: 223.0
Because we are now living on one income, we are living paycheck to paycheck. I started to track expenses on January 1, and it has been very helpful. Katie is a money pit. I took them to DSW to get black flats for Ellie for her band concert, and I ended up buying Katie three more pair of shoes.

I'll summarize the expenses once all of them are in at the end of the month, but I am becoming painfully aware of how much Katie talks me into spending.

So -- it has occurred to me that simply writing down what I eat could help me to see when I eat, as a way for me to limit my eating.

I started on Sunday, but I'm getting rid of the evidence. It was very painful to see just how much I ate.

Also, I've been reading an interesting book called The Collapse of Parenting, and the author suggests that you need to take a tactic which can be summarized as "fake it till you make it". A person who considers herself kind is more likely to be kind than someone who thinks of herself as doing kind things.

Being on a mission to lose weight implies I am fat which I objectively am. Do I lie to myself and say I am thin? Not exactly lie -- it's more that I need to stop trying to lose weight and instead see myself as thin. Silly idea, but I made copies this morning of a weekly food journal sheet with "I am fit and thin" typed at the top.

6 PM: I think I need to have as my goal that I only eat when hungry. If I fail, I fail, but I need that as my goal.

Friday, January 22, 2016: 224.2
I've been on the diet equivalent of circuit training for years, and yesterday I decided what I should do is eat meals that are small enough I eventually get hungry.

Last night, I realized this was a fail approach. I need to wait for hunger. Always. 100% of the time. It's odd, but I've often thought that whether or not I have taste tests at Costco and grocery stores is a key issue, and I have not known why since I don't get many calories from taste tests. Now I think I know why. It is that the availability and cost of food should not be a consideration for whether or not I eat. The only consideration should be whether or not I am hungry.

Monday, January 25, 2016:
Tuesday, January 26, 2016:
Wednesday, January 27, 2016:
Thursday, January 28, 2016:
Friday, January 29, 2016:
Saturday, January 30, 2016:
Sunday, January 31, 2016:


February, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
January 21, 2016: 223.0
January 21, 2016: 223.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight Summary here under name Kathleen!:
https://www.fourmilab.ch/cgi-bin/HackDiet/
Note: You need to create your own account, click under the tab "Utilities", and then enter "Kathleen!" in the dropbox next to "Access public account name:" This program looks like a really good way for me to stay patient. Thanks for the idea, TexArk!

Weight
Monday, February 1, 2016:
Tuesday, February 2, 2016:
Wednesday, February 3, 2016:
Thursday, February 4, 2016:
Friday, February 5, 2016:
Saturday, February 6, 2016:
Sunday, February 7, 2016:
Monday, February 8, 2016:
Tuesday, February 9, 2016:
Wednesday, February 10, 2016:
Thursday, February 11, 2016:
Friday, February 12, 2016:
Saturday, February 13, 2016:
Sunday, February 14, 2016:
Monday, February 15, 2016:
Tuesday, February 16, 2016:
Wednesday, February 17, 2016:
Thursday, February 18, 2016:
Friday, February 19, 2016:
Saturday, February 20, 2016:
Sunday, February 21, 2016:
Monday, February 22, 2016:
Tuesday, February 23, 2016:
Wednesday, February 24, 2016:
Thursday, February 25, 2016:
Friday, February 26, 2016:
Saturday, February 27, 2016:
Sunday, February 28, 2016:
Monday, February 29, 2016:


Journal
Monday, February 1, 2016:
Tuesday, February 2, 2016:
Wednesday, February 3, 2016:
Thursday, February 4, 2016:
Friday, February 5, 2016:
Saturday, February 6, 2016:
Sunday, February 7, 2016:
Monday, February 8, 2016:
Tuesday, February 9, 2016:
Wednesday, February 10, 2016:
Thursday, February 11, 2016:
Friday, February 12, 2016:
Saturday, February 13, 2016:
Sunday, February 14, 2016:
Monday, February 15, 2016:
Tuesday, February 16, 2016:
Wednesday, February 17, 2016:
Thursday, February 18, 2016:
Friday, February 19, 2016:
Saturday, February 20, 2016:
Sunday, February 21, 2016:
Monday, February 22, 2016:
Tuesday, February 23, 2016:
Wednesday, February 24, 2016:
Thursday, February 25, 2016:
Friday, February 26, 2016:
Saturday, February 27, 2016:
Sunday, February 28, 2016:
Monday, February 29, 2016:

Tuesday, March 1, 2016:
Wednesday, March 2, 2016:
Thursday, March 3, 2016:
Friday, March 4, 2016:
Saturday, March 5, 2016:
Sunday, March 6, 2016:
Monday, March 7, 2016:
Tuesday, March 8, 2016:
Wednesday, March 9, 2016:
Thursday, March 10, 2016:
Friday, March 11, 2016:
Saturday, March 12, 2016:
Sunday, March 13, 2016:
Monday, March 14, 2016:
Tuesday, March 15, 2016:
Wednesday, March 16, 2016:
Thursday, March 17, 2016:
Friday, March 18, 2016:
Day 1 - Saturday, March 19, 2016:
Day 2 - Sunday, March 20, 2016:
Day 3 - Monday, March 21, 2016:
Day 4 - Tuesday, March 22, 2016:
Day 5 - Wednesday, March 23, 2016:
Day 6 - Thursday, March 24, 2016:
Day 7 - Friday, March 25, 2016:
Day 8 - Saturday, March 26, 2016:
Day 9 - Sunday, March 27, 2016:
Day 10 - Monday, March 28, 2016:
Day 11 - Tuesday, March 29, 2016:
Day 12 - Wednesday, March 30, 2016:
Day 13 - Thursday, March 31, 2016:

Day 1 - Saturday, March 19, 2016:
"Pray to God, but row to shore." A very true statement! I've realized over the years that I have been on the equivalent of circuit training for dieting, switching from diet approach to diet approach with every increasing panic.

Yesterday, I thought: "If not now, when?" I need to look on myself as having the equivalent of alcoholism for overeating. I cannot overeat without severe consequences of not being able to stop. There is a saying for alcoholics that is something like: "One is too many. A million is too few."

Why? Why am I overeating? I think a lot of the reason comes down to lack of trust or fear -- and what is my fear? Fear of starving. Those years of severe dieting did a number on me. I remember reading somewhere that survivors of concentration camp had a tendency to obesity. Their hunger was imposed on them; mine was self-imposed.

I started writing down what I eat this week and saw a pattern of a lot of overeating when deciding to switch what I was doing.

Yesterday, I decided to wait for hunger and not eat otherwise and recognize that there are consequences if I do.

It is almost 11, my stomach is growling but I am not yet hungry, and I have not eaten since yesterday around 4 PM.

There is a story from the Bible about Moses being in the desert and his people being fed with manna from heaven which arrived in the morning but they were only to eat what was sufficient for that day and not store up manna for future days. That is what I need to do.

"One step enough for me." I need to take one day at a time.

I'm too embarrassed by my current weight to post but will post my weights when I get below 215. What I am going to do is track the number of days that I experience hunger before I eat anything for the day. That will be my metric.

With my not working, our income has gone down, but we learned with my working that my husband's job was put in jeopardy and we learned that we had a lot of additional expenses, especially taxes and an increase in food out.

We need to cut back on spending, so I've been tracking expenses and have come of with one number to show how we are doing: Take savings aside and then subtract expenses from remaining income. Example: Income = $10,000; Savings = $1,000; Expenses = $2,000. My one number is $10,000 - $1,000 - $2,000 = $7,000.

It is nice to have one goal. After 2 months, we are negative almost $4,000, but $2,150 was the last of the quarterly payments of estimated taxes for my working and $3,000 was to get a tree cut down. We'll get money back on taxes. This is a good system, and we'll be in positive territory by May.

With my system for weight, I'm looking at a percent. I think I should look at having a rolling amount since that is what I am using for spending. That makes for a more compelling case to wait for hunger each day if at all possible. My goal should be above 90%. That's an A.

Day 2 - Sunday, March 20, 2016:
I ended up eating at noon yesterday and then munched on and off for the rest of the day.

Day 5 - Wednesday, March 23, 2016:
I ended up modifying my diet somewhat by having the goal of eating after experiencing physical hunger or 5 PM for 90% of days. I am now on Day 5. What does this do? It results in my welcoming hunger because then I can eat! With dieting, you dread hunger because of the possibility you cannot stand it and binge it.

Day 6 - Thursday, March 24, 2016:
Day 7 - Friday, March 25, 2016:
Day 8 - Saturday, March 26, 2016:
Day 9 - Sunday, March 27, 2016:
Day 10 - Monday, March 28, 2016:
Day 11 - Tuesday, March 29, 2016:
Day 12 - Wednesday, March 30, 2016:
Day 13 - Thursday, March 31, 2016:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Thu Mar 24, 2016 1:50 am; edited 6 times in total
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 1202
Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Sun Feb 07, 2016 5:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,
Just wanted to pop in and say "Hi". Thanks for continuing sharing your story. I hope you have a really great February!
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-Sonya
No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Feb 27, 2016 2:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

PAINFUL... I returned to No S today. I'll provide an update when I'm willing to share my weight.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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gingerpie



Joined: 06 Apr 2014
Posts: 754
Location: Pennsylvania, US

PostPosted: Sun Feb 28, 2016 3:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen,
Just a kindly reminder that you don't have to share your weight. If you just need to "talk", we're willing to "listen". Hope to see you back soon.

Regards,
Virginia
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen, what is the longest you were ever compliant with Vanilla No S?

Being able to eat only when hungry is probably harder than being on a diet. It is the exception in the world. Individuals might but slim cultures do not depend on it. They depend on approximate meal times and routines for meal size and content. They sometimes eat when they aren't particularly hungry, though they may eat only a fraction of the meal they serve themselves. Occasionally, an individual might skip a meal, but it's not common.

What No S is asking is actually SO much less painful that what I've seen you go through here for all the six years I've been on the board that it's tough to watch the struggle. Obviously, the stakes have not actually been high enough, but you are not alone in that. Most of the public is in a similar boat. And no one can see that FOR you.

I do hope this season brings a newfound strength from your religious foundation, if nothing else.

Pray to God, but row to shore. Smile
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Tue Mar 01, 2016 3:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Happy to see you back! Yeah, we can only change things when we acknowledge our present, no matter how far it is from our goal or desire.

I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but people on the National Weight Control Registry (have to have lost at least 30 pounds and kept it off for at least a year) tend to weight themselves every day, or at least several times a week.

The reason is obvious, I think-if your weight is up a bit, you can monitor yourself more closely than usual, and if your weight is down, you can ease up a bit. But because you're monitoring so often,your weight never gets too far out of control.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 01, 2016 8:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The scale never helped me make any good decisions about eating. I know it's common on NWLR, which actually represents a very teeny number out of the millions of people on this quest, but it's uncommon in slim cultures to know one's weight. But it's very common in them to stick to mostly meals of reasonable size and to get regular exercise. Cultures that have traded those habits for the scale and diets, or for snacking and more sweets, haven't fared very well. More and more are succumbing all the time.

The real test is does it make a positive difference. Some people eat more out of disappointment when the scale is up. Some eat more when it's down because they think they can "afford" it. For them, it's probably not a good idea. But it may be worth attempting for long enough to get over the bumps and have it become an undramatic habit and cant eating in the target direction.

Of course, if someone has a real epiphany, many things that used to seem impossible become...possible. Too bad real epiphanies are serendipitous.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Eurobabe2



Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Posts: 62

PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 10:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Getting on the scales is what I needed to keep me motivated, and I've maintained my 35 pound loss for about a year (excluding what I lost on NoS). I'm 5'6" and 135 pounds, and I was sort of stuck at 170 for a loooooong time.

Yes, it's true that slim societies don't use a scale much, but we aren't one of those societies, where the social customs, restaurant fare, lack of availability of processed food and greater physical activity all work together to keep people slim. I love the NoS philosophy, but there came a time when I had to do more to keep my weight going down, and for me, that was a close monitoring of my weight.

But we're all different.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
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Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 11:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kathleen, you have weighed yourself at least a hundred times on this thread. Do you believe it has motivated you during the times you have been able to be compliant with one of your plans? If weight alone hasn't been enough, what is more important that could actually persuade you to eat reasonable meals consistently, even when you feel like eating more, do you think? Do you have a belief that you can't change this AND take care of your family? I say that because you said above that taking care of your family comes before taking care of your health. Why do those have to be mutually exclusive? It doesn't take any time NOT to eat between meals or have meals with no sweets. I'm sure your husband would support you in weekday exercise, no?

Also, could you please remind me what SET rules are? I tried skimming for them, but couldn't find the original post on them.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Apr 09, 2016 5:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

SET Rules:
Sit down to eat.
Eat without distraction.
Take hands or utensils away from food while eating.

My weight was 223.4 today. I have returned to weighing myself.

I have reason for optimism and will be posting soon.

There have been lots of changes in our lives to set us up to lead a healthier lifestyle: Tom taking a non-travel job, my not working, my learning to cook, and my making a commitment to exercise.

After more than a year of kids not being willing to eat much of my food, suddenly they are starting to like high-fat low-sugar food or even salads.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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oolala53



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PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2016 3:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

TX for reminding me about SET rules. Glad you are happy with recent changes at home.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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jackn



Joined: 16 Mar 2016
Posts: 635
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2016 3:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is a whole lot of good news, kathleen.

Thanx for the SET mnemonic. I find the rules very helpful.

Yes, I see about the high-fat low-sugar.
Personally, without aiming to go low-carb or whatever, something I don't practice, I've learnt to appreciate how satisfying fat is. In particular, I find animal fat, say butter and beef, satisfying.

What do you plan on doing for exercise?
How did you learn to cook and what do you feel you've learnt?

Good luck.

Kathleen wrote:
SET Rules:
Sit down to eat.
Eat without distraction.
Take hands or utensils away from food while eating.

My weight was 223.4 today. I have returned to weighing myself.

I have reason for optimism and will be posting soon.

There have been lots of changes in our lives to set us up to lead a healthier lifestyle: Tom taking a non-travel job, my not working, my learning to cook, and my making a commitment to exercise.

After more than a year of kids not being willing to eat much of my food, suddenly they are starting to like high-fat low-sugar food or even salads.

Kathleen

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Only eat at meals.
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Kathleen



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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2016 5:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

April, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
Day 1 - April 16, 2016: 225.0
Day 1 - April 16, 2016: 225.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight
Wednesday, April 6, 2016: 225.0
Thursday, April 7, 2016: 225.0
Friday, April 8, 2016: 224.6
Saturday, April 9, 2016: 224.6
Sunday, April 10, 2016:
Monday, April 11, 2016:
Tuesday, April 12, 2016: 224.2
Wednesday, April 13, 2016: 224.8
Thursday, April 14, 2016: 224.6
Friday, April 15, 2016: 225.0
Day 1 Saturday, April 16, 2016: 225.0
Day 2 Sunday, April 17, 2016:
Day 3 Monday, April 18, 2016:
Day 4 Tuesday, April 19, 2016:
Day 5 Wednesday, April 20, 2016:
Day 6 Thursday, April 21, 2016:
Day 7 Friday, April 22, 2016:
Day 8 Saturday, April 23, 2016:
Day 9 Sunday, April 24, 2016:
Day 10 Monday, April 25, 2016:
Day 11 Tuesday, April 26, 2016:
Day 12 Wednesday, April 27, 2016:
Day 13 Thursday, April 28, 2016:
Day 14 Friday, April 29, 2016:
Day 15 Saturday, April 30, 2016:


Journal
Friday, April 15, 2016: 225.0
It is appropriate that I post on the traditional tax day, even though taxes are not due until the 18th this year. Taxes figure in my story.

When I was working, Tom's job suffered. He got no raise or bonus. We ended up agreeing I should not work, but we had to pay in extra last spring because I was working in 2014, and then we owed four quarterly estimates of taxes because we "underpaid" in 2014. Tom changed jobs in October. He got a final payout from his former employer for vacation time he had not taken, and he got a signing bonus from his new employer. By Christmas, he was asking, "Where has all the money gone? Are you siphoning some off?" He didn't really suspect that I was hiding money, but he was very concerned that our bank account was not as high as he had expected.

I got tired of hearing him complain, so I started tracking what we spent. We each have separate credit cards, so it is easy to see who is spending what. We did identify some sinkholes in our budget, including Tom's daily parking expense of $12 or $13 and clothing for Katie. The big surprise, however, came from doing taxes. No wonder we weren't doing as well as expected! We had been put in a higher tax bracket by my working, and we had lost several deductions, including all deductions for our college-age children. Last year, we did not have my income but we had to suffer through paying taxes as if we had. Now what? Well, Tom doesn't want me to work, that's for sure! I was called for a 20 hour per week four-week contract position, and he did not want me to take it. Maybe in the fall, I can consider working. What am I doing now? Partly I am trying to figure out what to do to keep expenses lower. I am learning to cook. We are eating out less, although Katie remembers the days when we ate out dinner at least once per week. I found out that Costco has a very low cost pharmacy when you pay cash and don't use insurance.

I had read somewhere that a good way to success in an area in your life where you are not doing well is to find success in another area of your life and try the same approach. So -- on April 6, I decided to start writing down what I eat. I have learned in 10 days that I tend to eat a lot in anticipation of some sort of scheme to lose weight. Three days out of the last ten, I ate after noon. I was testing out fasting. Maybe, instead, what I should do is live in the moment -- eat what I want in the moment and not worry about weight loss. That sounds like the book Intuitive Eating. Last night, I took Katie to a book signing by a favorite author, and I picked up yet another copy of Intuitive Eating -- maybe my 16th or 17th copy. Why would I return to it yet again when I first read it in 1995? I don't do well dieting. Even following my SET Habits didn't work out. Why? There is a rebellion in me that is called "diet backlash" in the book.

Still, I could not see past having no process to follow. That is where tracking what I eat comes in. I can do that. I don't have to change anything but I can see where there are problems. For example, I can see that fasting is more of a temptation than anything else. My efforts at fasting have resulted in weight gain, not weight loss. Maybe I should stop... I relate this to Tom's parking for work. He found a ramp that charges $6/day that is two blocks away from the ramp that charges $12 or $13/day. This is a small, daily change that will add up over time. He could save $30/week just by walking two blocks each way from a parking ramp.

As for exercise, I overdid it. I tried to return to an exercise program I followed when the kid with a driver's permit was a baby. That was 15 years and 75 pounds ago. I was walking 3 miles in 42 minutes several times per week. I'd like to return to something like that but take my time getting there.

As for cooking, I am trying to eliminate processed foods as much as possible. The kids don't always like what I provide to eat, but I am getting better. I subscribe to Cook's Illustrated which does a good job of explaining how to cook and provides some good recipes. I always buy their magazines that are focused on one topic. A magazine just came out on Baking for Two, and the girls really liked the pound cake! Is pound cake a good choice? Yes, in that it is preferable to Oreos. We are working on making our sweets rather than buying them. I think that leads to more appreciation.

Here is my process:
1. Record what I eat. I list the time of day, the food with approximate amount, hunger level at start and satisfaction level at end. So far, I have just put dashes there because I feel neither hunger nor satiety.
2. Follow Ben Franklin's example of focusing on one virtue at a time. For me, this means focusing on one principle from the book Intuitive Eating per week. There are 10 principles in all. The first principle is "Reject the Diet Mentality". I am not willing to follow the recommendation to give up the scale, which is a recommendation from the chapter on rejecting the diet mentality, but I am willing to give up fasting and trying to eat only when physically hungry. That is a start.

8:30 PM: Tom just got done doing our taxes, and now he is spending the weekend with his mother to do her taxes. The girls and I spent the evening watching Sherlock. It is very good. Sherlock draws conclusions based on observation.

Meanwhile, what happened today? I was at a Toyota dealership and saw a young boy helped by his father to get a freshly-baked chocolate cookie. Did I want one? No. Why? I wasn't hungry.

In the afternoon, I decided to only eat when physically hungry, and I proceeded to eat, eat, eat. Then I decided not to have dinner and ate some more.

What should I observe? Dieting triggers binge behavior. Over and over, I resolve to restrict eating and instead binge. Dieting is a temptation!

I need to reject the diet mentality. This may take time. My mantra for this week will be "Dieting is a temptation."

Day 1 Saturday, April 16, 2016: 225.0
I am more motivated if I see my weight problem as having a spiritual dimension. Dieting is a temptation. A friend of mine once told me that what you think might be God's will for you needs to be filtered through three objective standards: Is it moral? Is it consistent with your state in life? Does it pass the test of common sense?

I wish I'd known that when I was dating "the perfect guy" 25 years ago. He didn't treat me well, but he was "the perfect guy".

What have I been doing? Looking for "the perfect diet". Trying to find a process I can follow "perfectly".

I need to apply the filter of common sense to losing weight. If I record what I eat, if I consider whether or not I am hungry when I eat, if I look for progress and not perfection or a dramatic instant change, I will be fine.

12 PM: I decided to make today Day 1 because I'm adding in the SET Habits:
Sit down to eat.
Eat without distraction.
Take hand or utensil away from food while chewing and swallowing.

That is enough. The SET Habits help make me aware of what I am eating and so does the food journal.

In addition, I will work on exercise, and I will work on making more nutritious choices.

Day 2 Sunday, April 17, 2016:
Yesterday was an unmitigated disaster. I ate just to eat. I have eliminated all other approaches to weight loss except the most simple of all: eat only when physically hungry.

Why? I don't know why. It's as if I'm like the alcoholic for whom this saying applies: "One is too many, and a million is too few." I cannot take one bite for non hunger.

All my arguments for why this is not a good idea were laid out yesterday here, but the fact is that I cannot seem to follow any plan except the simplest and most rigid: eat only when physically hungry.

5 PM: Back to plan from Saturday morning:
1. Record what I eat. I list the time of day, the food with approximate amount, hunger level at start and satisfaction level at end. So far, I have just put dashes there because I feel neither hunger nor satiety.
2. Follow Ben Franklin's example of focusing on one virtue at a time. For me, this means focusing on one principle from the book Intuitive Eating per week. There are 10 principles in all. The first principle is "Reject the Diet Mentality". I am not willing to follow the recommendation to give up the scale, which is a recommendation from the chapter on rejecting the diet mentality, but I am willing to give up fasting and trying to eat only when physically hungry. That is a start.

Day 3 Monday, April 18, 2016:
Day 4 Tuesday, April 19, 2016:
Day 5 Wednesday, April 20, 2016:
Day 6 Thursday, April 21, 2016:
Day 7 Friday, April 22, 2016:
Day 8 Saturday, April 23, 2016:
Day 9 Sunday, April 24, 2016:
Day 10 Monday, April 25, 2016:
Day 11 Tuesday, April 26, 2016:
Day 12 Wednesday, April 27, 2016:
Day 13 Thursday, April 28, 2016:
Day 14 Friday, April 29, 2016:
Day 15 Saturday, April 30, 2016:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Sun Apr 17, 2016 9:54 pm; edited 1 time in total
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2016 4:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How will you know if you are physically hungry? What if you are physically hungry only once a day?

Dr. James B. Johnson estimates that only about 10% of people can just eat when they are hungry, stop when full, and maintain a slim weight. This matches the data on world stats. Even in countries where people have never dieted, if the food supply increases, the average weight of people goes up, including climbing rates of overweight and obesity. They do not naturally rein themselves in. The WHO reports that weight has risen everywhere in the world except for places where there is famine or war. Most people do not naturally maintain slimness without other influences that curb their eating.

Is there anything that you actually want more than overeating?
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2016 9:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

oolala53,

I already figured out this is not the way to go. I wasn't hungry by 2 pm. I remember that the authors of the book Intuitive Eating said that animals in the wild do not get fat. Apparently, they are not aware that some prairie dogs are extremely obese.

I need to be patient with myself and just write down what I eat and figure out how to eat less. Tea now instead of cheese...

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Apr 23, 2016 5:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

April, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
Day 1 - April 23, 2016: 226.0
Day 1 - April 23, 2016: 226.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight
Day 1 Saturday, April 23, 2016: 226.0
Day 2 Sunday, April 24, 2016: 225.2
Day 3 Monday, April 25, 2016: 224.6
Day 4 Tuesday, April 26, 2016: 223.6
Day 5 Wednesday, April 27, 2016: 224.6
Day 6 Thursday, April 28, 2016: 225.4
Day 7 Friday, April 29, 2016:
Day 8 Saturday, April 30, 2016:


Journal
Day 1 Saturday, April 23, 2016: 226.0
It's pathetic when a teenage daughter calls you a whiner and complainer. A "portion control" approach to dieting immediately turns me into a grumpy, dissatisfied person who ends up binge eating and gaining weight. What a mistake! Intuitive eating makes me a belly gazer, always on the watch for any indication of hunger.

Fasting is the Catholic approach to self-control. It's interesting that self-control is now seen as a limited resource which needs breaks. I'm now going to fasting.

Day 4 Tuesday, April 26, 2016: 223.6
I wasn't sure the scale would register any weight loss this morning, since I started eating right at 5 yesterday and was painfully stuffed by 6:30 PM. I am visiting my parents on May 15 and haven't seen them since last summer when I weighed 218. My goal is to get to less than that by May 15. It is embarrassing to be so fat!

When I return, I will try fasting until we leave for Yellowstone on June 3. After we return from Yellowstone and have side trips up to Northern Minnesota, I am going to try 9 day fasts once per month.

That is my plan for now.

Day 5 Wednesday, April 27, 2016: 224.6
Fasting is powerful, but it can backfire. I think I'm going to try only for nine days of fasting until 5, and I'm going to suspend my exercise program. The dog still needs walks. If I get to 10,000 steps per day, that's good enough for this period of time when I am fasting until 5 PM.

5:40 PM: I did make it until 5 today and then ate quite a lot but not as much as on Monday. I'm stuffed. What makes it easy to fast is there is an end to restricted eating just hours in the future. I could tell myself at 11 this morning that I can eat anything I want at 5.

Day 6 Thursday, April 28, 2016: 225.4
This morning, I woke up feeling stuffed but still expected the scale to show a weight loss due to my not eating until 5 yesterday. No such luck. Still, there was a silver lining to the cloud: I realized I felt better yesterday afternoon than I did right then. Eating less actually made me feel better.

This may be the lesson of fasting: it teaches you how much you need to eat to feel your best by having you undereat. I went out to the kitchen and had yogurt with blackberries. It was a satisfying meal. Maybe I'll make split pea soup today. There is a band fundraiser at Chipotle. No thank you for me. I can have the split pea soup and the girls can have Chipotle.

Day 7 Friday, April 29, 2016: I got up late this morning because the girls have school off and Tom is in Dallas. Looking through the book Intuitive Eating, I considered the idea of honoring hunger and realized that that mean not just eating when hungry but also not eating when not hungry. The problem is that you cannot time hunger to meals. I was reminded of Anne's first manager saying: "There is not such thing as on time. There is either early or late." It is like this with eating: you will tend to eat when not hungry or not eat when hungry because you cannot time hunger exactly to when it is convenient to eat.

I need to learn to tolerate hunger so that I can eat at the next appropriate time to eat after I become hungry. What I've been doing is eating to avoid hunger. That approach has made me obese.

Day 8 Saturday, April 30, 2016:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Fri Apr 29, 2016 8:29 pm; edited 8 times in total
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Sun Apr 24, 2016 11:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fasting can go either way. It can lead to gluttony or moderation, depending on the faster. If a person believes that s/he is entitled to gluttony because of deprivation or an unwillingness to face down the almost inevitable urges to overeat, fasting will likely backfire. If the faster is honest that it actually makes her realize that hunger is not an emergency nor a reason to gorge, that she actually feels better when not always full, that there are fantastic benefits that outweigh the intermittent temporary discomfort, it can be a real boon, physically, mentally and spiritually.

I've had some good success in the last few months with some fasting, but honestly I wouldn't have even tried it if I did not already have the habit of fasting between three meals down pat before.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Apr 25, 2016 8:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi oolala53,
I have found that fasting does lead to overeating. I can fast until 6 and not be very productive or I can fast until 3 and not lose any weight. I'm trying fasting until 5. After that point, I can eat what I want and find I don't want to eat a huge amount.

People tend to think fasting is painful. It's not, at least for me at least for several hours. It is now 4 PM, and I am just starting to feel the effect of not eating all day. With portion control, I am climbing the walls within an hour.
Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Mon Apr 25, 2016 11:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Are you saying fasting leads to overeating or not? Your first line says it does but then you say later that you can wait until 5 and not overeat later. Or maybe there just isn't time? But so what? If you can live with the schedule, that's your freedom.

I know the proponent of the Fast 5 Diet basically recommends eating one meal a day. The book says a 5-hour window is available, but if you listen to him on youtube, you will glean that he himself does not eat throughout the window. It is a form of consistent calorie restriction rather than intermittent fasting. If it fits someone's life, so be it. Almost anything anyone does to curtail eating in this culture is going to butt heads with overeating habits.

Something similar (one meal a day, rather hefty) was suggested by the author of the Shangri-la Diet.

If a person eventually weans herself off nutrient-poor foods, I think this is actually a viable long-term alternative for some. Some may say that a person can't get enough nutrients, but the majority of overeaters aren't getting those nutrients either! For someone who just can't tolerate the sensations associated with eating less but more often than once a day, it seems worth considering. But it would be preferable to ask for strength to learn to do both, as life will often offer both.

Brad Pilon advocates dinner-to dinner fasts on 2 days a week for women whose body fat is greater than 25%, I believe. Then 1 day a week. But others have found it's viable every other day. However, it IS possible to make up for the deficits on the high eating days, though it actually isn't typical.

Catholics also recommend against overeating on days NOT fasting.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2016 11:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

oolala53,

I have tried the Brad Pilon intermittent fasting and found that I overeat on non fasting days and make up for the calorie deficit! It is incredible to me that nearly everyone in medieval times in Europe fasted Monday through Saturday until 3 PM and on Wednesdays and Fridays all year long except on holy days. Fasting is seen as torture in this society, but I find that it is very easy to fast.

Kayla, my personal training, asked me how I feel when fasting. I said "Fine". She asked how I feel after breaking a fast. I said "Fine". With portion control, I feel grumpy!

What I have found with daily fasting is I don't lose weight if I fast just until 3 and I start to get into torture territory if I fast until 6, so now I am testing fasting until 5.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Wed Apr 27, 2016 12:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What will make it pass the test?
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
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PostPosted: Wed Apr 27, 2016 2:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I need to lose weight.

Today, I started eating at 1. I'm going to keep to what I want to do -- fast until 5 -- and chalk today up to a failure.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 1:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

May, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
Day 4 - May 4, 2016: 226.0
Day 4 - May 4, 2016: 226.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight
Day 1 Sunday, May 1, 2016:
Day 2 Monday, May 2, 2016: 224.8
Day 3 Tuesday, May 3, 2016: 224.4
Day 4 Wednesday, May 4, 2016: 226.0
Day 5 Thursday, May 5, 2016: 224.0
Day 6 Friday, May 6, 2016: 223.4
Day 7 Saturday, May 7, 2016:
Day 8 Sunday, May 8, 2016:
Day 9 Monday, May 9, 2016: 222.8
Day 10 Tuesday, May 10, 2016: 222.4
Day 11 Wednesday, May 11, 2016:
Day 12 Thursday, May 12, 2016:
Day 13 Friday, May 13, 2016:
Day 14 Saturday, May 14, 2016:
Day 15 Sunday, May 15, 2016:
Day 16 Monday, May 16, 2016:
Day 17 Tuesday, May 17, 2016:
Day 18 Wednesday, May 18, 2016:
Day 19 Thursday, May 19, 2016:
Day 20 Friday, May 20, 2016:
Day 21 Saturday, May 21, 2016:
Day 22 Sunday, May 22, 2016:



Journal
Day 2 Monday, May 2, 2016: 224.8
Yesterday, I started -- once again -- to write down what I eat. Starting on January 1, I have recorded what we have spent, and it has helped us to manage our finances. I set up a very simple system in which I throw receipts into an external pocket of my purse, and when I get around to it, I record the amounts with associated categories. A Target run could mean one receipt with several amounts for groceries, household supplies, etc. The total is also recorded. The system is easy -- simple -- something I can do for the rest of my life.

I feel more in control of our finances. Tom was upset about the balance in our main checking account and said, "Where did all the money go?" I could say "Let's look."

That doesn't mean I cannot splurge on some things, even ridiculous things. Katie and I went to a global marketplace where a very eager Moroccan shop owner tried to sell us shoes or pillows or rugs. We purchased a pillow for $40. Neither of us wanted to leave that shop without rewarding the guy for his enthusiasm. He spoke with a thick accent, but I told Katie he was a real American.

How does this relate to food? On Saturday, there was an article in the Wall Street Journal titled "An Empty Wallet Again?" Here is part of what was written: "Tracking expenses isn't just a chore. It can be emotionally draining. 'For most people, sitting down and tracking their expenses is a similar emotional experience to counting calories. It often generates negative feelings - guilt, remorse, shame or frustration," says Brad Klontz, a psychologist, financial planner, and associate professor at Creighton University in Omaha, Neb.'"

I needed to remove judgement from tracking expenses and instead use the tracking information as input to making better decisions. Today, at Costco, as usual, I tried taste tests. There were three I saw: tortilla chips, popcorn, and Gelato. I passed on the tortilla chips because I don't like chips. Does this really matter? Yes.

Just like with expenses, the desire is to maximize pleasure within limits. What is the limit for expenses? It is money coming in. Tom wants to save more than we do, and we decided against custom made chairs in part because we are headed to Yellowstone for a family vacation in June.

What is the limit with eating? I am playing with the idea of reaching hunger -- hunger as a goal. I'll try to eat three meals per day but reach hunger sometime during the day. Hunger is my goal. It isn't a painful experience to be avoided at all costs, something that is promoted time and again. Instead, it is what I want to reach. My long term goal is to reach hunger at least once per day. I set up my monthly diet and exercise tracking sheet to have a column where I can record a time when I reach hunger.

Day 3 Tuesday, May 3, 2016: 224.4
Well, well, well... All my diets have had something in common: I've had a bright line for what/when/where/how I can eat, and I've tried to limit myself within the line, often -- always -- failing. This diet is different. For example, Tom made a run to the grocery store last night and brought back ice cream. Do I like ice cream? Yes! It could be considered a major food group of mine. Did I want ice cream enough to have it last night? No. I have a goal to experience hunger. Actually, I'm going to reduce my goal to just experiencing a hunger growl. Usually, growls precede actual hunger, and I'm so far from experiencing either hunger growls or hunger that I might as well start with an easier goal than experiencing hunger.

Day 4 Wednesday, May 4, 2016: 226.0
Stress eating yesterday. The election overwhelms me. Today, I had a small breakfast and then decided to wait for a hunger growl which occurred at 6:47 PM. Maybe I can just wait for hunger growls between times I eat.

Day 5 Thursday, May 5, 2016: 224.0
The problem with writing down what you eat is it leads to using processed foods because it is just easier: you don't cook because cooking usually means multiple ingredients. Calorie counting is even more problematic because then you are estimating calories per ingredient.

Tracking a hunger growl is much more specific and easier. Am I on my way to success?

11:30 AM: I feel calm. It is an incredible change. No longer do I ask myself if I am allowed to eat something, as determined by the rules of my self-chosen diet. Instead, I am asking myself it I am interested enough to eat something. I just had a spoonful of ice cream, not a bowl.

Day 6 Friday, May 6, 2016: 223.4
In retrospect, tracking days when I experience a hunger growl seems so obvious. The problem with dieting isn't that you get hungry: it's that you can never satisfy hunger. The brilliance of No S was that you knew you could satisfy hunger on the weekends at least. My problem with it was that I went way overboard, eating so much on the weekend that I did not get below 195.

Yesterday I did not experience a hunger growl but that is OK. It will take time for me to eat so much less that I routinely experience a hunger growl at least once during the day. I easily ate less because everything I ate was preceded with the question: "Is this worth it?" ... "Is it worth it for me to eat this, knowing that eating this will result in a delay in my experiencing a hunger growl?"

6 PM: I wish I could give a good analogy to how I am feeling, but the best analogy I can give right now is to say it is like flipping over a coin. The coin is the same, but the other side of the coin is completely different.

I have been living in a world of limitations. The limitations have been different, but they have still been limitations: calories, meals, eating habits, time of day, etc. I have always been concerned that I might get hungry and exceed these limitations.

The other side of the coin is about excess. I can eat whatever I want with the goal to get hungry enough each day to experience a hunger growl. Am I doing that? No. Still, irritation is creeping in: why am I eating when I don't even feel the slightest bit hungry?

The answer is starting to emerge: fear of hunger.

Limitations made fear of hunger more likely. With having a goal of hunger, I have flipped the coin. My goal is now what I had feared.

Day 9 Monday, May 9, 2016: 222.8
I got up late on Saturday morning, so I didn't weigh myself, but I decided that day that waiting for a hunger growl is unrealistic for me at this point. What I need to do is try to eat three meals per day even though I am conscious of the fact that I am not really hungry. The effect of that decision is that I am going to lose weight more slowly, but I am continue to feel calm because I know I am not hungry and can eat after I do become hungry.

Day 11 Wednesday, May 11, 2016:
Yesterday was an interesting day. My stomach growled about 7:40 AM, and I almost had a panicked reaction and ate until I was stuffed by the end of the day. My body has been trained to be afraid of hunger, and it will take some time for me to get over that. At least I now recognize the problem. Today, I did not weigh myself. I'm going to give myself a couple of days to recover.

I'm in a gray state of not wanting to follow any external measures of success and also not wanting to get to the point of experiencing a hunger growl.

Day 13 Friday, May 13, 2016:
This is from a May 6, 2016 Sunday New York Times article entitled Why You Can't Lose Weight on a Diet: "In people, dieting also reduces the influence of the brain's weight-regulation system by teaching us to rely on rules rather than hunger to control eating. People who eat this way become more vulnerable to external cues telling them what to eat. In the modern environment, many of those cues were invented by marketers to make us eat more, like advertising, supersizing and the all-you-can-eat buffet. Studies show that long-term dieters are more likely to eat for emotional reasons or simply because food is available. When dieters who have long ignored their hunger finally exhaust their willpower then tend to overeat for all these reasons, leading to weight gain."

That paragraph is a summary of 40 years of dieting for me. I am going to try to weigh myself only once per month and record when my stomach growls. That approach should help me to start to listen to my body.

Yesterday, I was busy in the morning and my stomach growled at about noon. I ate a lot the rest of the day. That seems to be a pattern I have seen with the other two times my stomach has growled. It's almost as if I am terrified of a stomach growl! My approach is to let go and see what happens.

Day 14 Saturday, May 14, 2016:
Day 15 Sunday, May 15, 2016:
Day 16 Monday, May 16, 2016:
Day 17 Tuesday, May 17, 2016:
Day 18 Wednesday, May 18, 2016:
Day 19 Thursday, May 19, 2016:
Day 20 Friday, May 20, 2016:
Day 21 Saturday, May 21, 2016:
Day 22 Sunday, May 22, 2016:
Day 23 Monday, May 23, 2016:
Day 24 Tuesday, May 24, 2016:
Day 25 Wednesday, May 25, 2016:
Day 26 Thursday, May 26, 2016:
Day 27 Friday, May 27, 2016:
Day 28 Saturday, May 28, 2016:
Day 29 Sunday, May 29, 2016:
Day 30 Monday, May 30, 2016:
Day 31 Tuesday, May 31, 2016:
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Wed May 25, 2016 11:34 pm; edited 22 times in total
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osoniye



Joined: 22 May 2010
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Location: Horn of Africa

PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 2:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hope you have a terrific May, Kathleen!
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No Added Sugar. No Snacks and No Seconds, Except (Sometimes) on days that start with "S".
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 4:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks, osoniye! I missed Northern Lights last night, but May is absolutely beautiful in Minnesota!
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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walkerlori



Joined: 11 Jan 2008
Posts: 987
Location: new mexico

PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love Minnesota.
Have a terrific May!
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
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Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2016 3:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Interesting. I thought you were going to fast until 5. It would certainly make tracking your food easier! But sticking to three meals and eating so that one feels hunger for at least one of them is something to aim for. It would make for a great May.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2016 3:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

oolala53,
I gained weight fasting until 5. When I met with my personal trainer and told her the results, she said she felt like throwing her pen at me. She is very frustrated that I am not willing to count calories. Yes, I understand, but calorie counting led to never ending binges.

I am moving to mealtime eating but not necessarily restricting myself. Instead, I am allowing myself to eat breakfast even if I don't feel hungry.

Kathleen
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 7704
Location: San Diego, CA USA

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2016 8:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good luck with three meals in May.
_________________
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 7 years & counting
Age 63 SBMI Jan/10-30.8 Jan/12-26.8 Mar/13-24.9 Dec/15 24.8 held steady +/- 8-lb. for two years Mar/17 22.8

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1491
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Wed May 25, 2016 11:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

May 27, 2016: The Blessings of Simplicity

Weight Summary
Day 1 - May 27, 2016: 225.0
Day 1 - May 27, 2016: 225.0
Number of pounds lost: 0

Weight
Day 1 Monday, May 23, 2016: 224.6
Day 2 Tuesday, May 24, 2016: 222.8
Day 3 Wednesday, May 25, 2016: 224.0
Day 4 Thursday, May 26, 2016:

Day 1 Friday, May 27, 2016: 225.0
Day 2 Saturday, May 28, 2016: 223.6
Day 3 Sunday, May 29, 2016: 220.6
Day 4 Monday, May 30, 2016:
Day 5 Tuesday, May 31, 2016: 220.4

Journal
Day 3 Wednesday, May 25, 2016: 224.0
One of my favorite sayings of my father is, "If something isn't working, try something else -- anything else!"

I'm good at that! I came across some youtube videos on intermittent fasting, and that led me to the name of Krista Varaday and "The Alternate Day Diet."

Here is a youtube interview of her:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAcY8p-yBxA

In the back of my mind, I've always had the nagging view that maybe fasting is good for you since it is practiced in so many religions. This diet is very close to what religious Greek Orthodox women do: fasting every other day, except they fast Monday, Wednesday, and Friday until 3 PM.

I ordered the book and don't have it yet, but the idea is you fast except for one meal on fast days and that meal is about 500 calories. You alternate fast and feast days.

I haven't even gotten the book and have modified it to this: fast on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, preferably until 6 PM, and then eat what you want in under an hour.

My second fast day is coming to an end. I started eating at 6:08 and finished about 6:34 PM, having eaten a lot of leftover turkey chili, eaten a banana, had milk, had two toll house cookies, had walnuts, and drank milk. I'm stuffed and not interested in anything more to eat.

This amount of food inhaled in 20 minutes is less than the wolfing down I did two days ago. I think I'm not going to worry about it and just see how this plays out. I was more interested in the sweet potatoes than the cookies but ate both.

Day 1 Friday, May 27, 2016: 225.0
I woke up this morning, thinking "I'm cured." It is not surprising that the scale showed a weight of 225 pounds because I ate so much yesterday. Why? Because I could. Dieting teaches you to get food while you can. I followed that same pattern with No S, when I ate everything in sight on the weekend, sometimes starting at midnight. I started to follow that same pattern with this diet.

What changed? I think it was due to reading the reviews on "The Alternate Day Diet" by Krista Varaday.

Here is the Amazon review that so impacted me:
"Just to add to the chorus, this diet does work. I was part of the clinical studies Dr Varaday held at UIC. I lost about 25 lbs during the 8 week program, then took a few months off for the holidays. I did not gain any weight back during that break! This year, I started the diet again for about 8 weeks, and am now down a total of 40 lbs from last fall. That's a lot of weight. And all I did was stick (close enough so) to the Every Other Day Diet.

When I tell others that I only consume 500 calories every other day, they think it's unhealthy, etc. It's not. Read the book. What this diet does is train you and your body about hunger and overeating. The basic math is simple - burn more calories than you consume and you will lose weight! Sure, I get hungry on the "fast" days, but not only am I used to not eating as much as I did before, but I've now know how to deal with hunger. I still eat all the same foods I did previously, I still enjoy beer as I used too, but I am now completely aware of how much food I consume and what it does to my weight.

And remember on the "feed days", it's not WHAT you eat, it's HOW MUCH you eat! Don't biggie size anything! Portion control! Split a kids fry with the entire family. Drink water. Only eat fried foods once a month. Limit bread, cheese, milk, mayo. Don't drink soft drinks, ever. Smaller plates. Skip dessert. On the fast days, celery and Louisiana Hot Sauce. Black coffee. a variety of Lean Cuisines (don't eat the same ones, too boring!) Self-weigh every morning. Ditch the old clothes as soon as you fit into smaller ones.

Look in the mirror. Don't fear hunger - deal with it.

When I meet people I haven't seen in while, they can't believe how much weight I've lost. Nothing motivates more than that compliment."

What got me in particular was the sentence" "Don't fear hunger - deal with it." Our society has taught us to fear hunger.

Other reviews said something to confirm what I've already figured out, which is that appetite decreases with fasting. You would think that would be the opposite -- that fasting would result in more fear of hunger and more appetite.

This reviewer brought up Lean Cuisine. I am never again going to have a Lean Cuisine. I'm not going down that path. What I am doing is learning to deal with hunger.

Many years ago, I remember a thin person saying she thought the the difference between fat people and thin people was that thin people can tolerate hunger. I stuck that idea in the back of my mind. Why would that be? Well, you cannot count on eating exactly when you get hungry. You can get stuck in traffic. A meal can be delayed because the meat did not cook as fast as expected. You can get hungry when you go to a concert.

How do fat people deal with the fact that they might get hungry at inconvenient times? They eat before they get hungry. Last week, for a day, I wrote down when I ate. I found that I ate before I drove five minutes to pick up the kids from the school bus. How embarrassing...

Thin people learn, as this Amazon reviewer wrote, to "deal with hunger."

I am also reminded of the saying of my daughter's manager from five years ago: "There is no such thing as 'on time'. There is either 'late' or 'early." Anne was aiming for 'on time' and so routinely was 'late'. The person watching her weight who aims for a state of 'not hungry' is going to remain fat.

By fasting, we learn to tolerate hunger. I actually have found fasting to be restful.

Day 3 Sunday, May 29, 2016: 220.6
On Friday, I was actually able to pick up Varaday's book which I had ordered from Barnes & Noble. The body has to do a lot of work to digest food. The author emphasized limiting calorie intake to about 500 calories on Diet Days. I was focused on limited when I eat, and I ate a lot as soon as I could. On Friday, I ate soup at about 5:30 but then went into a bit of a binge. On Saturday morning, I woke up and decided to fast that day as well, only to eat very late and to measure out my food. What I decided was to have 1/2 cup of walnuts plus milk. I had some baby carrots as well but that is it.

Tom and I have mostly not been around each other for the last two weeks. I was visiting my parents in California, then he was in Baltimore for work, and now he is visiting his Mom for the weekend. I have stayed away from him because one thing I picked up was that the diet can affect mood until you get used to it. Katie clearly picked up on a change in mood, and I told her why. Last night, I told Tom why. He quipped about the diet, "Good. We can save money on the vacation." Katie is worried I am doing something bad for my health. I'll have to print off a scientific article for her.

One modification I have made to the diet is to make it three times Monday - Saturday. Although I did not eat until 5:30 PM on Friday, it wasn't really a fast day because I was not limiting food intake. I'll try for M, W, F as fast days. What has always intrigued me about fasting is that it was so widely practiced in Catholic countries during the medieval period. No one fasted on Sundays. It was considered a mortal sin to fast on Sundays. I'm going to respect that there is something different about Sundays and never fast on Sundays.


Day 5 Tuesday, May 31, 2016:
I so overate on Sunday that I felt ill on Monday morning. It was easy to not eat. At about 8:30, I had my 1/2 cup of walnuts and milk, but I also had some strawberries and a frozen banana.

I don't like the idea of fasting on Sundays. Since you are supposed to fast every other day, I think I'll plan to fast four of six days Monday through Saturday. That means that there will be two consecutive days of fasting per week. Today might be a good day for fasting. Not much is going on. School is finishing up, and we are packing for our Yellowstone trip.
_________________
Day 1 - May 21, 2017: 226.0
Day 47 - July 7, 2017: 222.0
If you are a morning person, skip breakfast. I try to eat in an 11 AM - 7 PM "eating window".
See post for June 24, 2017.


Last edited by Kathleen on Tue May 31, 2016 1:42 pm; edited 4 times in total
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