Everyday Systems

Help, you guys! I need motivation. I'm terrible. I was doing good for a few days and I just broke down and ate cake and it's not an s day. I'm never gonna learn to eat healthy!!!! I'm so mad at myself.

Don't right off the day yet. Someone on here suggested taking each meal at a time. Draw a line and continue as if it didn't happen. You will get there. Everyone struggles to a degree.

That's Ok.

Stop where you are right now and tell yourself firmly "That's It Over, Time to Move On"!

Now continue to the next scheduled meal and eat it as you are meant to. Do not let this derail you. It is one slip and if you stop it now it will be easier next time to say no!

((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))

It's OK. Breathe.

There are two kinds of people who have never made a mistake on No S. Newbies who haven't made their first mistake yet, and liars.

The sun will rise the next day after you have a red day. You won't get kicked off this forum. I know these things from personal experience.

Thank you guys all so much for the encouragement! I'm going to start out this new day trying again. I appreciate your kind words so much!

You dented the fender. You don't have to wreck the car. You are doing well to stop, take a breath and regroup. Well done.

amen

You can use this to your advantage. Stop, forgive yourself (you're only human) and make a decision to try again tomorrow. If you throw in the towel you're reinforcing a sense of failure and defeat. If you move on with forgiveness you're doing the exact opposite. Be kind to yourself - you're the only person you're guaranteed of spending the rest of your life with so be as nice to yourself as you'd want someone else to be to you in the same situation x

It is likely you're going to have to talk yourself into staying the course many times over the months and years. To do that, you've got to give up saying things like, "I'm never going to learn to eat healthy!" just because you make a mistake. In fact, giving mistakes any kind of dramatic energy increases the chance of repeating them!

If it sounds like a long haul, remind yourself: people who lose and maintain have to keep doing this over and over, too, for several years before their odds of relapsing drop below 25% . The difference is that they don't let slip ups derail them for any length of time. They go right back to their new habit, even on the same day. You CAN be one of those people. Just keep going.

you're not "terrible" ... it's the habits that are bad and they're hard to break! it takes a lot of practice and expect to have some slip ups, maybe even a lot of them... just don't beat yourself up and keep getting back up again!
you can do this!

As others have said, it's really important to try and see any failures (and we ALL have them!) in as rational a way as possible.

Does eating a piece of cake really mean you are terrible??
Will you really 'never' learn to eat healthily because you made one bad choice?

Every day you can make new choices and decisions, keep at it!

You are not terrible. I would say you didn't even do a terrible thing. I'd prefer to reserve that word for things that hurt other people. This doesn't mean you will never learn to eat healthy. It means you're doing something you're new at, and you made a mistake. That's part of how we learn to do things.

What can you learn from this? Where did you get the cake? Would it be possible to avoid that place, or to spend less time there? If the cake was at your home, would it be possible to not have cake around on N days (or maybe to have kinds you don't really like)? I don't hang out in the kitchen when I'm not eating a meal (or a snack on S days), preparing a meal, or cleaning up. If you spend a lot of time in the kitchen, you might want to find somewhere else to hang out. It's a lot easier to resist food if you can't see it or smell it.