JillyBean's Check In

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon Apr 14, 2008 1:34 pm

Day O

I am brand new and want to get my daily post started today. I have had a good breakfast, read some posts, signed up, and now am off to work. I will be ordering the book from Amazon today, mostly as a way to offer my gratitude to Reinhard (if you're reading this - thanks!), because I think the "rules" are pretty well outlined on the website.

I have not felt quite so optimistic about the future with regard to my health, peace of mind, body image, and food obsession in a long time, maybe ever. Thanks again, Reinhard

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Apr 15, 2008 11:47 am

Day 1 SUCCESS!

A pretty straightforward day. "Normal eating," which I define as eating what I want that is nutritious and good-tasting, and stopping when I have had enough. I cleaned my plates at breakfast and lunch, but I had food left on my plate at dinner. I think the difference might have been that I was so hungry at dinner I took more than necessary, as in "my eyes were bigger than my belly." So, when I started feeling like I had had enough and would be too full if I kept eating, I stopped. Amazing!

Now, about being too hungry at dinner time... There are some things I can do about that. I can wait and see if this is happening every evening, which means I am not getting enough lunch or there is too long a time between lunch and dinner. Or I can perhaps revert to a "habit" I used to have of having a glass of wine while I'm preparing dinner. Since excess alcohol has not been a problem for me in well over two decades (and never was a big problem anyway), that sounds like the preferable thing to do at this point. I was fully satisfied at lunch and don't like the thought of having to increase lunch to avoid getting too hungry at dinner. And I can't have dinner sooner if I want to have it with the rest of the family, so I would have to postpone lunch and eat that later, in which case I would probably get too hungry at lunch time.

I love the fact that I have so many options. The way this "diet" is set up, I have a lot of room for improvement and self-tayloring. And reporting here means I get to think out loud about it and maybe even get some feedback from someone further along in the process of "normal" eating.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:27 pm

Day 2: SUCCESS!

I love this way of eating! I was hungry again last night just before dinner, but it was not as rough as the night before. Both my husband and I have been experiencing that. He said last night that he didn't think he was much of a snacker, but, because he's getting hungry, maybe he was snacking and not realizing it. I think he's right about that. Anyway, I'll bet our bodies will adjust. We just need to make it a habit. Gotta tame that elephant!!

A few weeks ago I borrowed a book from the library called "Why Can't I Stop Eating?" and I was pretty sure (though I hated the idea) that it was true--that I have an addiction to sugar and flour and cannot ever put it into my system. The thought of living so rigidly for the rest of my life was really depressing. I know I need to have some sort of parameters, but didn't feel I would ever be able to stick to something that severe. But, like I said, I had sort of resigned myself to the idea. I ordered a copy of the book for myself and it arrived yesterday along with a couple things my daughter wanted. I took the things for her out of the box and packaged that book right back up and am returning it today. The books "Why Can't I Stop Eating?" and "The No S Diet" will cross in the mail. I am so happy to be getting a book with a plan I know I can live the rest of my life!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 11:38 am

Day 3: SUCCESS!

Have I said lately that I love this diet?! It sort of feels funny calling it a diet because I don't really feel deprived. Yes, I have had to tell myself to wait a little while longer and I will get to eat a meal. Yes, I have had to say, "Don't get too concerned. If you want that you can have it on Saturday." But, something about knowing that it's coming is giving me peace of mind and ability to wait.

I have promised myself that I will not get on the scales, so I won't. But, I feel better already. Okay, time for breakfast!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri Apr 18, 2008 11:18 am

Day 4: SUCCESS!

Gee, I don't know what else to say! I feel so much better about myself in just a very few days.

Reinhard, if you're reading this: Thank you!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 1:48 pm

Day 5: SUCCESS!

Dinner out at and with the neighbors' went great! It was so easy! Had a glass of wine while everyone else munched on the hors d'oerves. Had a plate of food that was very satisfying and brought home some dessert for today. Awesome!

AND, my book came yesterday, so I have some great reading to do.

Hubby, who started this with me on Monday, has lost 4 pounds! I am not weighing myself, but I know I've lost some too.

And today is Saturday!

MollyMouse · Post by **MollyMouse** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 2:06 pm

Congrats on your success.. Like you I did not step on the scales, but that was out of fear, and I am a real scale person.. I go pee and then weigh.I did weigh on my first morning to see where I was, and I am going to try and stay away from the scales until day 21.
Enjoy you "S" day
Cheers
Marilyn
aka MollyMouse

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 2:50 pm

Thanks, Marilyn!

I responded to a post in the general discussion forum this morning and thought I would copy and paste it here. (I might need the reminder someday.) I wrote:

This is exactly why I am not weighing myself. Those who love getting on the scale might want to say I am in denial. How will I "know" if I don't weigh myself? Well, my rings are looser, my pants are looser, my belly feels flatter when I first wake up in the morning, the puffiness in my face is gone... There are so many other and, in my opinion, better ways to measure my success.

My husband lost 4 pounds this week. (We just started on Monday.) There is no way I would have lost 4 pounds. If we were both weighing ourselves and I had gotten on the scales this morning too, I would be feeling discouragement right now. I do not intend to ever let the scale ruin a beautiful week for me again. Been there, done that far too many times.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun Apr 20, 2008 11:42 am

Day 6: S Day

I considered typing "SUCCESS" because even though all snacks, sweets and seconds are technically allowed, I didn't do much of that. I did have a reasonable-sized dessert after lunch and dinner. But, no snacking and no seconds, and my meals themselves were just like I'd have on an N day. And this did not happen because I was trying to "be good" but just because I allowed myself what I felt like having.

Today is a usual day around here (so far) and I think it might be more of the same...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:57 am

Day 7: S-Day

I was really craving some chocolate last night, but we didn't have any. I could have made choc. chip cookies, but it was late and I didn't feel like all that work. We had some popcorn, which was good, but I still wanted the chocolate. So far today, I am feeling fine - not resentful about no chocolate because I can have it next Saturday. Or maybe before. We are leaving tomorrow for Arizona for a week. I'm going to take each day as it comes, trying to use the rules as much as possible, but not feeling like a failure if I don't. In other words, I guess there might be some "funny stuff". It is a vacation and I intend to be unobsessed!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 12:55 am

Day 8 (today): SUCCESS!

I know, the day is not over, but I may not get a chance to get on tomorrow morning since we are leaving for Tucson in the morning. I want to put down today's success just in case I don't get a chance to get to the computer for a few days. I am certain that I will not be eating anything tonight, but if the unimaginable did happen, I can come back and change this. (That is NOT going to happen!)

If I get a chance to use my brother-in-law's PC, I will check in and update. Otherwise, I will have lots to talk about when I get home (next Monday)!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun Apr 27, 2008 12:47 am

Day 9 (Tuesday): S-Day Travelling to Arizona. Not a bad day though for a week-day, S-Day. Only thing was a few samples from a chocolate store in the Chicago airport.

Day 10 (Wednesday): S-Day This business of travel is not conducive to eating like at home. I had as close as I could come to a no-s day, but meals are irregular and there was a little snacking.

Day 11 (Thursday): S-Day Again, not a horrible day. I'm really trying to stay relaxed about the whole food issue.

Day 12 (Friday): S-Day Okay, now I am starting to look forward to the way I eat at home. I am missing my broccoli and carrots!! I had my first real overload of a sweet today. We stopped between lunch and dinner and got a "treat" but when I was finished I felt sort of icky and wished I had not eaten it.

I am typing this at my brother-in-law's computer as we just arrived for a visit and no one is home. Just thought I'd get caught up on a few of these days before I get home. We head home tomorrow night on a red-eye flight. Back in Maine on Monday and back in my own home Monday afternoon. It's been a good trip so far and I am relieved not to be feeling bad about food.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Apr 29, 2008 3:28 pm

Day 13 (Saturday): S-Day
Day 14 (Sunday): S-Day
Day 15: Success! Oh, it feels so great to be able to type that again! Not that it was a particularly easy day for success and if I'd really wanted to I suppose I could have called it an S day as we were travelling home. But, you know, I just really wanted to get back to eating what I feel is good for me. I missed my veggies and the feeling of getting up in the morning knowing I ate well the day before.

I got the book right before we left on our trip, so I was reading it on the flight home and there are some great things in there. It is so much about common sense and yet, I don't think it's about "oh, whatever makes you feel good" either. I mean, there are things I ought to do to feel good, physically and mentally. I think mostly it just takes the guilt away. Anyway, I love it!

I "officially" dropped out of OA today. By that I mean I made some phone calls and told some of the key people in my life (including OAers that think I ought to be attending still) that I will not be attending meetings any longer or concentrating on working the steps. That does not mean I cannot live a "good life." In fact, I think my life will be getting better because I will be able to concentrate more on what's going on in my family and my marriage.

Those (my family and my marriage) have always been the most important things to me and I thought for a long time that I needed to get my food and weight under control before those would get better. I started focussing so much more on OA than on my family life that I think it got out of hand and it really did not improve my family or my marriage. So, I am going back to what really matters to me now. This "normal" way of eating will help me to do that finally. I cannot get over how "livable" this diet is. I still have a hard time calling it a diet.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed Apr 30, 2008 11:32 am

Day 16: SUCCESS!

Last night I finally finished the book (by candle light). Our power was out for 3 1/2 hours. I had been reading when it went out and I was quite engrossed. It is definitely something to be read again and again.

I am thinking today about the scales. Yesterday I had sort of made up my mind (from what I'd read in the book) that I would weigh myself on the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd of each month, morning, noon, and night, and take the average of the 9 weigh-ins for the month. But, then I start thinking, "Well, what will I wear? Will I have to strip for each one? What if my clothes don't weigh the same each time? Blah, blah, blah. This shows me that the scale still has too much power over me. So, maybe I should just stay off the scales completely for a while? But, then does that mean I am in denial? Maybe I ought to just weigh in for three days in a row first thing in the morning and then forget it? That takes the pressure off what to wear at least. I will need to decide before tomorrow morning...

As for food, I am very content with how it's going...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 01, 2008 12:10 pm

Day 17: SUCCESS!

Yesterday I was hungry between lunch and dinner and then again felt like eating after dinner, but I did not give in to the urges.

I weighed myself this morning (the 1st of the month) and will again tomorrow and the next day and then take the average of the three days. I will not weigh again after that until the first of June. I hope to lose around 40 pounds, maybe a few more. I am willing to let it be a slow process because I want it to last. I am so tired of the yo-yoing, the bingeing, the fear of eating, the resentment of people who "eat what they want and are thin." As long as the weight is going down, no matter how slowly, I think I will be content.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri May 02, 2008 12:14 pm

Day 18: SUCCESS!

Went out to lunch with a friend yesterday and I still cannot get over how easy this way of eating is! But... She contemplated having a dessert, then said something about sharing one with me, even though she already knew I was following No S because I'd told her that when we went in. (We have a history of talking diets - don't most women?) So I told her I would be sticking to my plan and she ultimately decided against the dessert, saying something about the price and that she didn't need it. I would have been fine with her having something, but I think maybe she didn't because of me. That feels a little weird, but I'll just have to get over it. I only have to take care of me.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 03, 2008 11:16 am

Day 19: SUCCESS!

Yesterday was easy. So far today food has been no different than an N Day. We are going out to dinner this evening - a fund-raiser at school, but I don't anticipate too much damage being done.

The weighing in for this month ends tonight. There has not been a huge fluctuation in what I've weighed, though at this point the trend is going down (1/2 pound less each morning). I know that's not fat loss and the loss is probably more about getting back to normal after being away from home... But, I am spending too much time typing about it. I must remember, it's just a number...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun May 04, 2008 2:30 pm

Day 20: S-Day

Not a bad day. A little snacking, a little dessert after lunch and after dinner. What I imagine "normal" eaters would call a normal day.

It's funny how all week I was imagining that I would make a batch of cookie dough and eat my fill of it. Here it is Sunday and I don't think that's going to happen this weekend. I'm feeling more like I want to just be able to have something if the situation arises instead of that I have to make it happen.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon May 05, 2008 11:58 am

Day 21: S-Day

That completes 21 days for me, but I do not feel entitled to join the 21-day club because of the extra s-days I had in there due to the vacation. To be fair, I feel as if I should have a good three weeks of n-days. Maybe I should say, "to be rigid and a perfectionist." These are the traits I am working to let go of. I have done very well with this way of eating (still not comfortable calling it a diet) and I have earned my right into the 21-day club. I will honor that right by committing to not getting a red mark on my habitcal at least until I have 21 green days! But, I am not going to be mean to myself and say I don't belong. Those days are over!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue May 06, 2008 1:00 pm

SUCCESS!

What do I call this day? Day 22? Day 1, Round 2? To me, now that I have completed 21 days, I think I will just call it a success. I am keeping track on HabitCal, so anytime I want to look and see what day I am on I can always look it up there.

Anyway, no funny stuff for yesterday. I am grateful for the freedom this way of eating has provided me. Dare I say it again? I love it!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed May 07, 2008 11:46 am

SUCCESS!

A great day yesterday. I have lots I want to accomplish today, so I'm now going to check out a few other posts and then get my day going.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 08, 2008 12:00 pm

SUCCESS!

I was hungry some yesterday, but somehow I seem to know that it's okay to be a little hungry once in a while. I know a decent, satisfying meal will be coming soon and I have been able to just let it be. It is becoming more and more apparent to me that the diet industry has really messed with my mind!

Anyway, it was a good day yesterday and hubby came home from work with some wine and he proposed a toast to No S, the first "diet" we have done together that is, in his words, fun!

I am going grocery shopping today and there is a dessert that I have not made in years that I thought of earlier this week. I will dig out the recipe today to see what I need to buy to make it over the weekend.

(See what I mean by fun!)

Dawn · Post by **Dawn** » Thu May 08, 2008 5:55 pm

Hey Jill, just being nosy and seeing how others are doing. I agree with what you said about the diet industry messing with our minds. I used to think that only applied to the weak minded, which of course I am not

Or so I thought. I am reading Mindless Eating by Brian Wansick and it is shocking how smart the food industry is. Study after study they come up with the same conclusions. So many ways that we mindlessly eat anywhere from 5 to 20% more than we think we are and more than we should. It makes me feel a little better knowing that I really have been hustled, but knowledge is power and now I am learning how to mindlessly eat less and lose weight. Goes so well with No-S. It's just one more way to get ignorance and denial out of the picture so we can clearly see what we are eating and make the best choices possible.

Keep up the good work and I hope you truly enjoy your S day dessert!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri May 09, 2008 11:46 am

SUCCESS!

That's my stand. Hubby says the raw green bean I had before we sat down to the table was a snack. I say he's trying to get even over the Life Cereal incident!

At any rate, this is MY daily check-in and I say yesterday was a success!

Thanks, Dawn for the well-wishes. I have had my eye on that book and I just might buy it soon. Right now though I'm trying to really keep this simple and sticking just to Reinhard's book and this website for "diet brain food."

I bought my yellow cake mix yesterday. I have all the other ingredients for the dessert on hand. I won't be making it until tomorrow because I don't need the temptation today! I wonder if I will be reasonable or an idiot? Either way, my goal is no guilt, shame, or resentment.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 10, 2008 10:50 am

SUCCESS!

And it was earned! (A stressful evening getting DSL hooked up.) I am thrilled to have DSL, but the price I had to pay (asking for help from a man who hates me using the computer - aka my husband) was a little steep. Since he doesn't use the computer and is resentful of my time on it, he would rather throw it out the window than move furniture and check phone lines. But, I knew eating wasn't going to help. Actually, the thought occurred for only a second. There was no fighting in my head about it. It just wasn't/isn't an option anymore.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Sat May 10, 2008 7:33 pm

There was no fighting in my head about it. It just wasn't/isn't an option anymore.

Jill,

now THAT is a huge SUCCESS!

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun May 11, 2008 1:11 pm

S-Day

Happy Mother's Day to me (and any other mothers reading this today).

Thanks, blue!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon May 12, 2008 12:11 pm

S-Day

Although it was an S-Day and there are no failures, I am not thrilled with yesterday. I didn't feel good by the end of the day. Just too much food and not hungry enough to eat it. So, as my quote says, it wasn't a failure, but there was feedback. I hope I remember it for the next s-days. I am glad today is an n-day.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue May 13, 2008 11:41 am

SUCCESS!

I love being able to type that! I was so glad to be back to an N-Day yesterday. It was not easy because I did get a little hungry (probably more head hunger though, really) but I am determined to not get a red mark, so I persevered.

Hubby came home from work and told me he has an s-day. I asked him what he meant (it's not his birthday or anything...) and he said that someone brought in a cake and he felt obligated. We talked about that a little bit, but I don't know if it helped or not. Anyway, I am not responsible for his eating habits anymore than he is responsible for the feelings of the cake baker.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed May 14, 2008 11:56 am

SUCCESS!

I put too much on my plate yesterday at lunch, (I know this because I was too full to finish it), but besides that it was a great day. I hope to be able to judge a little better in the future. I think it was probably some backlash from the day before because I had gotten hungry so, I was trying to insure not getting hungry. And that worked, because I did not get hungry until dinnertime, as opposed to an hour or so before dinner.

I actually like getting hungrier though. Now, isn't that crazy? I wanted to eat a lot of lunch so I would not get hungry, but then I realize I like getting hungry? Getting hungry is not something to be afraid of. Maybe that's the lesson I learned yesterday.

Writer110 · Post by **Writer110** » Thu May 15, 2008 2:48 am

Wow, that is a great lesson! Not being afraid of hunger is huge!

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Thu May 15, 2008 3:36 am

I actually like getting hungrier though. Now, isn't that crazy?

Jill,

a new thing for me too, and yeah it is kind of crazy but it's definitely a good kind go crazy

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 15, 2008 11:48 am

SUCCESS!

Thanks, Moxie and Blue for the positive feedback.

It was good to get on this morning and have your reminders there. I am seeing a habit that needs work - I am putting too much on my plate still.

Last night we had pizza and I put one big slice on my plate, then added broccoli and since my plate still had room I thought, "Only one piece of pizza?"

So, I added another smaller slice.

Fortunately, I realized before eating it that I didn't need it and left it on my plate.

But that took a conscious decision. If I had been on auto-pilot, I would have just eaten it and then been overfull after the fact.

So, is the fact that I can't have more (no seconds) causing me to load my plate?

Probably, and what I need to do is realize that I don't need more.

Maybe the solution would be to go to the smaller (luncheon size) plate? It would look like I had a full plate and that might work better. I will start using the smaller plates today.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri May 16, 2008 12:22 pm

SUCCESS!

Thanks, Moxie and Blue! "Go crazy

" I love it!

Another great day yesterday! My daughter made cookies (chocolate chip - a little on the underdone side) this week and I am going to have her make some this weekend because I have been thinking about them some...

Here is how it went: She doesn't have much time in the evenings when she gets home because she is VERY involved in school stuff. So, she had to break up the process. First she asked my permission. Then she made the dough and put it in the fridge until the next evening. She hid it way in the back where I wouldn't have to see it. (Plus, I think she didn't trust me, and who could blame her.

) The next night she baked them off. She was running out of time before having to leave again for school, so I took the last batch out of the oven for her. And I forgot to mention that she was baking these for her boyfriend to take with him to music camp. I told her when she asked my permission that she would have to leave a few for us for the weekend. Then, when I was putting them in the container for her to take with her that evening I decided it might be best for them all to be gone, so I packed them all up and they are gone.

But yesterday I began thinking about them and I wished there were a few left for the weekend. Man, they looked good! But a fresh batch will be much better, so I am going to ask her to make more. I could make them myself, but stuff always tastes better when someone else makes it, don't you think? (As long as they are good cooks, that is...)

Anyway, is there a lesson here for me? I think it's that, whether I have them this weekend or not, I am enjoying the anticipation. When I do instant gratification I miss all this "delicious" anticipation!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 17, 2008 12:45 pm

FAILURE

Oh how I hated to type that! My first one! I even thought about calling it an s-event because that's sort of what it was, but I had planned to skip the dessert and I didn't and it would be dishonest to say otherwise. So, for a failure it was far from a massive one and today is an n-day and I am just going to let what happened last night be proof that I am human.

What happened: We went to an informational dinner for Juniors interested in going to Maine Maritime Academy (like my daughter). I had my one plate of food and it was a successful n-day up to the point where the waitress stuck a bowl of apple crisp in front of me and I didn't refuse it. I was eating slowly and enjoying it and so my spoon was down and she came back and asked if I was done (about 1/3 of the way into it) and I said, "yes" and she took it away. So it was not a disaster by any stretch. I feel good about it, all except having a red mark on my report card now.

Again, it just goes to show, I am not perfect. (But I'm pretty d^&$% good!!)

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Sun May 18, 2008 6:24 am

(But I'm pretty d^&$% good!!)

YES JILL, YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!!!

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun May 18, 2008 12:30 pm

S-Day

A good day. A fun night!

Thanks, Blue!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon May 19, 2008 2:17 pm

S-Day

Once again, I was ready by yesterday afternoon for the structure of n-days. Some time in the future I am going to get up on S-Days and eat very much like I do on n-days. I think what I am doing right now is learning what my body really likes. I've never listened to it before. So, as Reinhard says, it will take some time; but because this is such a livable plan, I can stick to it forever.

And this weekend I started rounding up all my diet books and 12-step books and self-help books, and I am packing them away in boxes. I got my cookbooks out of the back of the closet where they were totally inaccessible to me and have put books in my bookcase that I will read for pleasure. I remember once about a year ago someone asked me what I was reading and when I told her she asked again, only the next time she said, "what are you reading for pleasure?" I haven't done that (read for pleasure) for a long time either! Amazing how this plan is changing my whole life.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue May 20, 2008 12:33 pm

SUCCESS!

Can't say it was extremely easy, but I can feel the "habit" part kicking in now.

Hubby says we have a couple different sledge hammers, so I'm going to look into shovelgloving today. And as I type my friends are on their way here to get me for our walk, so... gotta run!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed May 21, 2008 11:26 am

SUCCESS!
Went out to lunch with hubby yesterday and then didn't have dinner until almost 7:30. I can't believe I was not starving by then. It seems that it's all just mind over matter. I was very satisfied after lunch and I was not thinking about my next meal at all. It's really great to have life be about more than just when, what and where my next meal will be.

Yippee!!

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Thu May 22, 2008 2:11 am

It's really great to have life be about more than just when, what and where my next meal will be.

Yessssssssssssssssssss!

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 22, 2008 12:07 pm

SUCCESS!

In addition to the No S food plan, I am not getting on the scales except for once a month. This is easy most days, but lately I am beginning to feel like I want to lose weight faster than I am. I have been working to convince myself that 2 pounds a month will be acceptable to me, because I really do believe slow is better. Yet, because it is so slow, there are days when it feels like I have not lost an ounce. Those are the days I would like to get on the scales just to convince myself that I am doing okay, (i.e. not gaining).

Argh, it's an obsession I have and I don't like it.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 22, 2008 12:09 pm

blueskighs wrote:
It's really great to have life be about more than just when, what and where my next meal will be.

Yessssssssssssssssssss!

Blueskighs

Thanks, Blue! I think I needed to be reminded of this this morning.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 24, 2008 12:40 am

SUCCESS!

No time to post this morning. We got up early and were gone all day checking out a college. Since today is almost over, I contemplated writing this post for both days, but I like the idea of being able to get up in the morning and type SUCCESS! again!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 24, 2008 12:54 pm

SUCCESS!

AND we were away from home for two meals! Hubby was tempted by the huge muffins offered at the college tour, but they didn't bother me at all. I looked at them once and thought, nope, not worth it today. Then at the restaurant on the way home he was enticing me (teasingly) with a margarita, but I resisted that too. I will allow myself a glass or two of wine, but to me a margarita would be a sweet.

Today I get to have a piece of fudge from a batch my daughter and her boyfriend made Thursday night. I noticed it was almost gone last night and so I wrapped up the last of it and it will be a small piece each for hubby and I. In the past I would have had it as soon as I got up in the morning! Now I am willing to wait until later, probably right after lunch...

Hurray for a well-earned S-Day !

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun May 25, 2008 12:30 pm

S-Day

I wish I had eaten less popcorn last night, but otherwise it was a great day. Maybe popcorn will be one of those things that I'll need a "glass ceiling" for. I certainly could have used it last night and I doubt it would have made it feel like an n-day, if you know what I mean.

Hubby and I were out getting groceries together and when we were on our way home he offered to take me for a hot fudge sunday. I took my time answering and sorted through how I was really feeling about it and decided that I really didn't want one. My first reaction when he asked was, "Yes! After all, it is an S-Day!" But then, I realized: 1) I am not hungry at all, 2) we would be having dinner soon and the clams I was looking forward to wouldn't taste as good if I "ruined my appetite", and 3) we would have all summer to get ice cream because there are going to be at least 2 days a week when it will be perfectly "legal." This showed me that my thinking about food and eating is going through some drastic changes. I am happy...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon May 26, 2008 11:55 am

S-Day

So now that I have a few s-days behind me I have begun to notice a pattern. Right from the start I didn't have a problem with seconds, so nothing new there. As for snacks, when I first started (and I'm talking about n-days and s-days here) I didn't think I had a problem with snacking, but after a couple days realized I actually did because I would be really hungry by the next meal and wishing I could eat early. But, I have not snacked on an n-day since I began, and snacking now on s-days amounts to maybe having a few chips or crackers as I'm preparing lunch or dinner. Not a big deal...

Sweets are definitely my thing. I still love them and once I have one, I do want more. The amazing thing now though is that I naturally am able to limit it to one. So, over the course of this weekend for sweets/snacks I had: one small piece of fudge, one Klondike bar, one ice cream sandwich, and too much popcorn Saturday night. I keep thinking I must have forgotten something; but, no, that is it.

I have not binged once since starting this food plan!

(I'm going to share this over on the General Discussion Board this morning, too, because I think it definitely bears repeating.)

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon May 26, 2008 8:08 pm

Well, I finally did it. I have wanted to change my name from "Just Jill" for a few weeks now, but never actually got around to it until now. I realized after a while that "Just Jill" was not very flattering. It's like saying, "It's only me. No big deal. Who cares?"

It took some thinking to come up with a name that I wanted to use. "Jill" was already taken. I have been called a few nicknames, but I wasn't sure what to use here. "JillyBean" is light and fun and that's how I am feeling lately about my life since No S, so that's it.

(Nichole: Thanks for the tips on how to do the changes.)

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Tue May 27, 2008 1:51 am

Love the new name!

frisky spunky!

JillyBean!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue May 27, 2008 12:13 pm

SUCCESS!

I did not take yesterday as a special day. Once, for just a few seconds, I sort of wished I had so that I could have something sweet, but I would have had to declare it a failure if I had because it was not in the plan and would have just been an excuse, so I told myself I could wait until next Saturday. This is going to be a busy week, so I won't say more for now.

Thanks, Blue, glad you like it!!

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Tue May 27, 2008 12:22 pm

Good for you to stick to your guns! I smiled when I saw Jillybean, there is a painter whose artwork is beautiful, I love her santa's, her name is Jillybean. The awesome thing about this program is that, you can have gratification, you just have to wait for it. It's not like the other diets, where certain foods are frowned upon, this program lets you have it, but just on certain days. Have a blessed day.

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Tue May 27, 2008 3:46 pm

Way to Go Jillybean on the new name....it's fun! And also on not making an easy excuse out of a negative behavior.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue May 27, 2008 4:13 pm

Thanks, CC and OG! I like it too!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed May 28, 2008 11:20 am

SUCCESS!

This morning I am feeling fat. I will walk in a while and I hope that helps. I may have to start paying closer attention to my food. Even though the days are successful as far as snacks, sweets and seconds go, they still could be too caloric for my body size and my age. Drats!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed May 28, 2008 4:13 pm

I did it! My first day of shovelgloving! I am proud of myself!! (We'll see how I feel tomorrow...)

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu May 29, 2008 1:56 pm

No S: SUCCESS!

Shovelglove: SUCCESS!

Walk: SUCCESS!

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Thu May 29, 2008 2:06 pm

WOOHOO FOR YOU Jillybean!!!! Good job, keep it up!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri May 30, 2008 11:11 am

No S: SUCCESS!

Shovelglove: SUCCESS!

Walk: SUCCESS!

Thanks, OG! I hope to!

Could've had a failure on shovelglove last night if not for checking in here and keeping a habitcal. It was sort of late in the day and I was tired, but I am sooo glad I did it! It just feels great to know that I am able to do anything if I make up my mind to it! Hopefully I am not stupid enough to make up my mind to do the impossible, but No S is not even remotely impossible!

The scales are coming up and I do have a little trepidation around that process. As long as it doesn't unhinge the No S connection, though, I will be fine.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat May 31, 2008 12:07 am

No S: SUCCESS!

Shovelglove: SUCCESS!

Walk: SUCCESS!

Yeah, today is not over yet, but I am certain that I will not be having anything else to eat tonight. I will not be able to post in the morning as we are leaving very early for the convention. I've never been (well, not since I was in high school), so I have no idea what to expect. Hopefully, it will be fun...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun Jun 01, 2008 1:34 pm

S-Day

June 1st - Weighed in this morning. Up 3.4 pounds since the first of May. Obviously I am not too happy about that. I still have two more days of weigh-ins, but I think it won't vary much. It didn't last month. So, what that probably means to me is to work toward some better choices. Paying closer attention to not cleaning up my plate. The Clean Plate Club is a hard one to get out of.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Sun Jun 01, 2008 10:12 pm

Jill,

just wanted to share a quote from Reinhard's book:

An empty plate sends a powerful Pavlovian signal to the brain. As you build the habit of limiting yourself to just one, and empty plate will mean "done" on a deep, unconscious level. It's like a stop sign, not only to your conscious brain but also to your appetite. You won't just know you are done, you will feel it.

I was kind of exhilarated to learn that on NO S I did not have to try to break myself of my clean my plate habit, that I could in fact as Reinhard states above, get it to work for me.

One of my large food problems is there is a large gap between what my mind thinks I need to eat and what my body actually needs to eat. I have been working gradually on No S to decrease the size of this gap. For me, I ignore the SIZE of my plate. I focus on my hunger and am getting much better at knowing how much food I need. I put that amount of food on my plate, no matter the size of the plate and when I am finished I am done.

Now because I have been gradually decreasing my portions, when I go out to eat, I simply cannot physically clean my plate any more. A completely strange phenomena I know.

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 11:44 am

S-Day

Thanks, Blue, for the reminder. I think I'd better re-read the book and refresh my mind a bit. Paying attention to my hunger is, of course, a much better way to proceed. You have helped me to think about it from a different angle this morning and I will take a few minutes before my meals and decide how hungry I am and put a reasonable amount on my plate based on that. I have been putting enough on my plate to be sure I don't get too hungry between and start snacking. I realize I am rarely hungry between meals now. That needs to change if I'm going to lose (and certainly if I'm going to not gain!).

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Jun 03, 2008 11:57 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

Obviously a good day yesterday.

Since today is the third, it is the last time I will weigh myself for another month. Good thing. Although the weight has been less each morning of the three, I can tell that it could become habit-forming to be weighing each day and then I'd be obsessing about it again. (Especially since at the moment it seems to be going down.) What it is really all about, though, is my thinking. I don't want to be obsessing about it. I don't want to be focussed on my weight. I want it to naturally drop to a healthy place and stay there.

Thank you to Reinhard for this simple set of rules that will help me do just that if I only stick to it. And thank you to all who read and post with your experiences that I can learn from (whether I agree with them or not...)

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Tue Jun 03, 2008 2:24 pm

WOOHOO Jillybean!! What a great day yesterday, and I'm with you on the learning things on these boards.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed Jun 04, 2008 10:53 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

Another great day yesterday! It's going to be a rainy day today. The kind where I like to stay in and bake! But I won't be "going there" today. I may see how I like walking in the rain with an umbrella instead...

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:44 am

did you try getting out in the rain?
just wondered ... actually sounded a bit like fun

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 10:55 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

Sometimes, when I type all that in the morning, it seems too good to be true. Did I really do it all right? Well, yes, I did. Amazing!

I even walked in the rain! (

Blue) It wasn't pouring, just a gentle rain. The dog had a blast and I kept moving because the mosquitoes were also having a good time hunting for food for their babies, if you know what I mean...

Today is shopping and errand day. See you all tonight! Make it a great day!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri Jun 06, 2008 11:22 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

I was on the road, so I took optimized oatmeal for lunch. What a great idea! I had a thermos with hot water and I poured some on and let it sit for about 5 minutes, then ate in the car. It lasted well until dinnertime.

Dinner was two glasses of wine, two small slices home-made pizza and a large salad. This is a diet?? Wonderful!

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri Jun 06, 2008 1:24 pm

I just went to my sock drawer and found a Ziploc snack bag with m&m's in it and a note from my 17-year old daughter. The note says: For an "S" day. Love ya, Alecia.

Am I lucky or what? She's a great kid. Her boyfriend gave her a big bag of m&m's the other day and apparently she wanted to share, but is also respectful of what I am doing. I'll really enjoy them tomorrow...

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Sat Jun 07, 2008 12:58 am

I just went to my sock drawer and found a Ziploc snack bag with m&m's in it and a note from my 17-year old daughter. The note says: For an "S" day. Love ya, Alecia.

Oh My GOSH ...

that is so cute!

What a sweetie!

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat Jun 07, 2008 1:09 pm

No S: FAILURE (About 1/2 C. of blackberries and raspberries 1/2 hour after finishing dinner)
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

They were just sitting there on the kitchen table and I ... well, you probably know the rest of the story. The amazing thing is that I stopped with those and didn't want to continue with anything else. And I don't feel guilty...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 5:34 pm

No S: S-Day
Shovelglove: S-Day
Walk: Success!
Plating by Hunger Level: Success!

Until last evening I could have claimed yesterday an N Day, and not that I was trying, but that's just the way it happened. But, I did have ice cream last night and it was delicious and I was able to be satisfied with the amount I chose...

So far, today's going well too...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:00 am

No S: S-Day
Shovelglove: S-Day
Walk: S-Day
Plating by Hunger Level: S-Day

Too much to eat yesterday. Glad to be back to Monday...

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 10:05 pm

JillyBean wrote:
Too much to eat yesterday. Glad to be back to Monday...

You and me both! Have a blessed day.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Jun 10, 2008 12:19 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

I felt much better waking up this morning. Now I just need to figure out getting my walks in over the summer. I may set my alarm and get up really early before the heat hits for the day, but it's too late for today. Yesterday was the last day of school for my daughter and we slept in some today...

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed Jun 11, 2008 1:37 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

Had an emotional incident yesterday that brought memories of past behavior; specifically, using food to escape. It was very interesting to see that I truly have used food to deal with life quite a bit of the time. I still feel as if I eat too much at mealtimes, but I think what I saw yesterday was progress for me. And that is SUCCESS!

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Wed Jun 11, 2008 1:48 pm

Good for you Jill, your progress is very inspiring to me.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Wed Jun 11, 2008 4:01 pm

specifically, using food to escape. It was very interesting to see that I truly have used food to deal with life quite a bit of the time.

i too am definitely ... on and off ... doing No S getting it very clearly how i have used food in my life ...

GLAD THAT YOU HAD A SUCCESS,

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu Jun 12, 2008 2:17 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: S-Day
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

I did not get my walk in yesterday, but I did do lots of housework and was on my feet all day, so I just didn't think it would be fair to myself to call it a failure. It did not feel like a failed day...

PS Thanks OG and Blue for your supportive words yesterday.

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Thu Jun 12, 2008 4:45 pm

Hello Jillybean! I left a reply for you on my check in. Girl, houswork IS exercise and it should count as such. Have a blessed day.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri Jun 13, 2008 12:33 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

The shovelglove came late in the day, but I guess that's the beauty of the 14 minutes. I was tired, but anybody can do something for 14 minutes. My walk was accomplished by parking at the far end of the two grocery stores and included the walking around in the store. Not the most aerobic walk, but still, I was moving!

Have I said lately that I love No-S?

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Fri Jun 13, 2008 1:39 pm

I love it too Jill!!! If you've read any of my daily check ins lately, you know I'm under a lot of stress....great cause (in the past) for emotional eating, but with No S, there's no problem. Sure the impulse is still there sometimes, but I haven't acted on it, thanks to No S.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sat Jun 14, 2008 11:20 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

Well, it is Saturday morning and the anticipation of having something sweet today and tomorrow is absent. I can scarcely believe it. It is not that I plan not to have anything sweet, but, rather, I don't feel the urgency to "have it while I can." In the beginning of No-S I used to dream up all kinds of things to have on the weekends, now here it is and not a thought about it until typing this morning.

OG, I noticed rather early on in No-S-ing that the impulse was pretty quickly taken care of. I just made up my mind that Monday to Friday I was going to follow the plan. No debating with myself about it. Once I did that, and the thought of eating outside of the No-S plan came up, it was immediately replaced with the thought that I'd have to wait until the weekend. Now I don't even have those thoughts. (Or at least they are very rare, now. I don't like to say "never".)

I have always believed (even though OA tried to teach me otherwise) that it was all about my thinking. I don't have a physical addiction that cannot be controlled. My thinking was a habit though and it did seem sort of like an addiction. But, I am stronger than food! And very relieved to know that now...

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:02 pm

I don't have a physical addiction that cannot be controlled

Me either

! what a relief

Blueskighs

fkwan · Post by **fkwan** » Sat Jun 14, 2008 9:17 pm

blueskighs wrote:
I don't have a physical addiction that cannot be controlled
Me either ! what a relief

Blueskighs

Dittoditto

yay f

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Sat Jun 14, 2008 9:35 pm

JillyBean wrote: But, I am stronger than food! And very relieved to know that now...

Isn't that a wonderful thing!! God Bless.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 3:01 pm

No S: S-Day
Shovelglove: S-Day
Walk: S-Day
Plating by Hunger Level: S-Day

Well, yesterday was a sort of crazy day with food. Margaritas, nachos and salsa in the evening were the most egregious. But, I'm okay with it. It's nice to give myself a break.

Also, last night someone asked if I'd lost weight. Then this morning my son said, "Is it the nightgown, or have you lost weight, Mom?" I do not believe that I've lost any, though I don't get on the scales until the first of the month. My clothes don't seem looser to me... Still, it gives me a good feeling that people seem to think I might have lost some.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 1:19 pm

No S: S-Day
Shovelglove: S-Day
Walk: S-Day
Plating by Hunger Level: S-Day

Back to "normal" today. So far I have had a good breakfast and walked. Reading and cooling off now before doing shovelglove. Then I'll shower and start the other business of the day. Hope to hear of some good successes over the weekend!

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:12 pm

Good Afternoon Jill! People complimenting you is always a good thing! This weekend was not bad on sat. but yesterday being fathers day was kind of over the top, we over ate at the buffet for lunch, we skipped breakfast, we went to 2 movies one with son and his wife and the other one just hubby and I , we shared a bag of popcorn and ate ice cream when we got home. I really need to make the S days a little more sane. have a blessed day.

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:40 am

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

I love Mondays! I cannot believe I just said that. This "diet" is weird...

Actually, what I really love is Tuesday morning after a successful Monday. And, CC, I think it's about how I feel about my behavior more than anything else... What I love is being able to decide for myself what I will do, and having some guidelines that I know are sensible, but that are manageable without needing to focus all day, every day, and sometimes every second of the day just to get through without hurting myself with food.

Giving myself "treats" on the weekends (and, most importantly, not feeling guilty about them) feels great because I know it's allowed. And yet, I also know (and always knew, but was never able to apply the knowledge before No-S) that having treats all the time is a terrible thing to do to myself. I just never had a reasonable plan before this.

So, what I really need to say instead of "I love Mondays", is I love No-S-ing!!

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Tue Jun 17, 2008 12:40 pm

I agree with everything you said Jill! I too love No S-ing!!!!!

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Tue Jun 17, 2008 12:40 pm

You are so right about everything! I never thought I would be glad to see Monday, but I am, because it's so easy to just get back to the No S part of the plan. God Bless you with success.

kccc · Post by **kccc** » Wed Jun 18, 2008 1:29 am

Sounds as if you're really doing great! A lot of what you say really resonates with me too - I understand exactly. (I was a slow learner on this one - I had insane S-days for a loooong time. But they're getting better now. So glad I stuck with it.)

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Wed Jun 18, 2008 12:08 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

OG, CC, and KC: Thanks for your support and just for being here and caring and taking the time to respond. (And there are others too, that respond sometimes that I want to thank too, and hopefully you know who you are...

)

I have my life back. I love it. I'm not perfect, my life is not perfect. But I feel free to make decisions and plans today that I have not been able to do for such a long time. EVERYTHING used to revolve around food and my beliefs about how I looked. I did not believe such a healing was possible. I am so grateful.

And it's pouring out today and I don't know how I'll get my walk in, but I will. It's that simple. Not a big deal. Sometime during the day I will get a chance to walk some. Maybe I'll even walk in the rain. I've done that before too. Oh, life is good. (Maybe I'll buy myself one of those t-shirts now...)

My thanks especially to Reinhard for sharing his ("your," if you're reading this) wisdom.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Wed Jun 18, 2008 10:19 pm

But I feel free to make decisions and plans today that I have not been able to do for such a long time. EVERYTHING used to revolve around food and my beliefs about how I looked. I did not believe such a healing was possible. I am so grateful.

DITTO!

and it truly is A HEALING

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 12:31 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!
Plating by Hunger Level: SUCCESS!

I am a little unhappy this morning with the way my "plating by hunger" habitcal is working (or rather not working). I have discovered that I am still not a good judge of how much (or maybe I should say "how little") I need to eat to be satisfied. I put what I consider an appropriate amount on my plate, but I am quite often ready to stop eating before the plate is empty.

I believe what Reinhard says about the empty plate being a good signal that I am done, but I also feel like I am overeating because of it. I'm wondering if I should switch to a different method. Say, something like "stopping when satisfied"? Is it really necessary to eat all that's on my plate for that visual signal? Argh, tinkering is a scary thing sometimes...

CatholicCajun · Post by **CatholicCajun** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:52 pm

What size plate are you using? Instead of a regular 9" plate, try using a salad plate, I bought some at the local wal-mart for 1.00-1.50 each. God Bless.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 2:46 am

Jill,

I use my plate not as a minimum but as a limit,

when I eat a smaller meal sometimes I put it on a smaller plate and sometimes I put it on a large plate for the "presentation" aspect. i.e. there may be a lot of space left on the plate but it looks pretty and when I am done I am still done! When I serve myself I have a good idea of how much is a right amount ... so this is setting my limits for the most part ... not the actualy plate.

every now and then if I am really hungry or I am eating large amounts of fruit and veggies the plate is the limit.

Blueskighs

JillyBean · Post by **JillyBean** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 2:32 pm

No S: SUCCESS!
Shovelglove: SUCCESS!
Walk: SUCCESS!

Thanks CC and Blue for your suggestions and ideas. I gave considerable thought yesterday to what is going on and I have come to the conclusion that my behavior is caused by fear of being hungry. I know that to change that behavior I have to get to the root cause and deal with it, so I am changing tactics. Thinking about how much food I think I ought to eat and putting that on my plate is not working because I usually have too much food. I so don't want to be hungry, mostly because I don't trust myself to not eat... So, I need to learn three things here, I think. I need to learn what amount will satisfy me depending on my current hunger level, and I need to learn that getting hungry will not hurt me, and I need to learn that, even if I do get hungry, I will be able to wait until the next mealtime.

I think a better goal to work toward is to learn to listen to my hunger and fullness cues. So I am abandoning the plating by hunger habitcal. When I am putting food on my plate (at least at this time in my life) I misjudge the amount. I can see that I have been putting more on because I want to be sure not to get hungry. The logical part of my brain knows that if I get hungry it won't do any harm. So my new behavior that I am going to try for a while is this: Learning what amount will satisfy me. If I am never getting hungry, then how am I going to learn what amount is too little? I'm going to take an idea that BrightAngel did with the snacking habit and have a habitcal for each meal of the day. (She tracked between-meal snacking.) I will track whether I remembered to stop eating when I began noticing I was satisfied. Leaving food on my plate is not the goal. In fact, if I can learn to correctly estimate my meals (like you have done, Blue), that is the ultimate goal. But, this breaks it down into smaller goals for now. Make sense?

Something I was thinking about after writing this is that it follows some of the No-S logic this way: We say no to sweets, snacks and seconds during the week. But we also know during the week that we can have them on the S days. This makes doing the No-S days easier and it makes the S days more enjoyable because we've earned them. It can work that way for me with my hunger too. I say no to the excess food that's been helping me avoid being hungry, knowing that another meal is coming soon and I will enjoy it more because I will have earned it.

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:28 pm

Sounds like good thinking Jill. One of the things I like about No S, is that there really is no room for failure when it comes to the one plate, 3 meal rule. It is a learning process, as we learn to truly feel and accept hunger, as we learn to know our bodies and what hunger and fullness is for us, as we learn to make adjustments as we build strong habits. I love learning, especially self-directed.