The 'No' in 'No-S'

ThomsonsPier · Post by **ThomsonsPier** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:23 am

Sorry for the cheesy (mmm, cheese) subject title.

I just wanted to give some kudos to that word before the 'S' for helping me lose weight. In this social snacking society, it seems to have become the norm to feed people whenever you see them. Okay that's a slight exaggeration, but if you visit someone or go somewhere of interest, it's often the case that you'll be asked if you'd like some biscuits with your drink, or if you'd like some seconds of the dinner you've just been cooked, and won't you have some dessert? I made it specially... (...so I could have an excuse to eat some, too). As it would, of course, be horribly impolite to refuse, we accept the proferred comestibles and absorb some more calories.

One of the hardest habits to break when starting this, I found, was to decline such offers. I was so accustomed to automatically accepting hospitality that my brain no longer played an active part in the process. My spinal column did all of the accepting cups of tea, slices of cake and biscuits I would ever need.

Thus, my first concerted effort went into stopping that well trained response before it could spring forth at every offer of tasty goodness. "No, thankyou," I said, to biscuits. (Well, not to them directly; to those who offered them. I don't talk to biscuits. What do think I am, mad?) "No!" to the many offers of cake. "I'm full, thanks," to that spoon of extra potatoes bearing down on my plate. I have yet to quieten the rapid reflex which responds in the affirmative to every offer of a cup of tea that comes my way. We all have our weaknesses.

So far, I have found that no-one has been mortally offended by my refusal of treats, nor have they cast me from their lives in shock at my lack of awareness of modern etiquette.

This word, then, 'no', can exert power over those who would wilfully enlarge you by malicious feeding. Embrace its power! Use it to defy the onset of weight gain and ill health in this, a world which insists you consume to conform! Just say 'no!'

But do so politely.

Cheesy nibbles, anyone?

Daisy · Post by **Daisy** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:44 am

I do it too, I always feel that I have to feed people - just to be polite, even though I don't want to eat anything myself.

david · Post by **david** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 5:26 pm

No cheesy nibbles, thanks!

My daughter, who is seven years old, "helps" me with the NO thing. If someone offers me sweets on an n-day she'll tell them that it's not an s-day so I can't have any. Then, I get to explain what the no-s thing is all about!

--david

Mia21972 · Post by **Mia21972** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 6:50 pm

I hear you loud and clear. I'm Italian-American, proudly so, but my culture is almost synonomous with overindulgence in food. Striking the balance between hospitality / manners / social grace and healthy habits is the key. As soon as I manage to strike said balance, I'll let you all know! ~Mia

operababe · Post by **operababe** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 8:20 pm

TP: This topic is right on, saying no doesn't make us bad people - it makes us sane, healthy people who are standing up and taking care of ourselves.

Although I will always say yes to cups of tea, I love my tea, but the biscuits and the cheesy things are NO NO NO!

I have one head-strong relative, although I love her dearly, but she's 84 and thinks that no means yes and please give me seconds. I visited her a couple of weeks ago and found myself lying to her "Auntie, I can't, sorry, but I've just found out I'm diabetic". God help me, she is the one person I can't say no to. Sigh. But the idea of a medical condition stopped her from shoving that huge piece of lemon pound cake with raspberry sauce in front of me. (Sure, it sounds good, but the sauce is there because her cake is usually stale. She never throws anything out. Did I say she was head strong?)

gratefuldeb67 · Post by **gratefuldeb67** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:22 pm

Stale cake with sauce...
Sounds good!
LOL...

Well hopefully staying with NoS will keep you from becoming a diabetic, so why not say that instead?

Say,,, I don't want to become a diabetic, and if I don't lose weight I could become one...
That's not lying..

Just a thought to keep you from getting into a vicious cycle of having to lie to every headstrong person who throws stale cake at you...
Just be headstrong back!

Have a great night and remember, in the words of someone (was it Reagan or Bush???) to
"Just say No"
LOL..

Peace and (Tough) Love,

Deb

Mia21972 · Post by **Mia21972** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 11:01 pm

Deb~ it was Nancy Reagan, and I can tell you that the campaign was a complete disaster that has become a pop-culture joke.

Operababa~ don't sweat about lying. I HATE peanut butter, the smell of it even makes me nausous. I tell people I'm allergic to peanuts so they don't try to convince me that I'm nuts for not liking peanut butter. For some reason a medical reason is easier for others to accept than a preference not their own.

operababe · Post by **operababe** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 11:55 pm

Oh Deb,
I would love to say that I could become diabetic, but I know my Aunt. Her reply would probably be, "Don't talk crap! Here, eat your cake."

Hey Mia,
I appreciate your kind words. My Aunt would probably say, "Don't you carry one of those pens? Here, eat your cake."

I think you get the idea of the kind of gal my dear old Auntie is! But I do love her dearly.

Mia21972 · Post by **Mia21972** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:37 am

LOL, that's too much, Operababe! My Gramma bugs and bugs and bugs for me to have "just a little something." Then, when I finally relent, I no sooner have a bite to my lips and she says something along the lines of, "Oh Mi- you're so pretty...if you could just lose 10 pound!" Can't freakin' win!

operababe · Post by **operababe** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:06 pm

Mia,

If it helps, take a look at the Life Is Hard, Food Is Easy thread that I've posted. The idea is that the first two bites are the nurturing ones, after that, you're just fueling your body.

I hope you don't mind, but next time your Grandma offers just a "little something", then ask her to just give you two bites worth. If she ignores that, and just plunks down a pile of food in front of you, then get yourself a small plate, portion two bites worth onto that plate, and eat that. You'll probably find that the "Oh Mia, you're so pretty, if only" comments will be a thing of the past. Also, your family will soon get used to offering you much smaller portions of food. You can train them Mia, I know you can!

To TP: Sorry, it looks like we've hijacked the thread and got into discussing elderly female relatives to whom we can't say no to. But your message is sound, say no, say no, say no, is now in my head every day.