Hi...new and ready for a change!

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Mon May 23, 2016 11:11 pm

Hi All,

I stumbled across this site last Friday and read as much as I could until it made sense and I felt ready to begin. I tried an experimental N day on Saturday just to see if I could get through it. It felt weird and my stomach felt hollow but I made it. I then had an S day on Sunday. Now it's Monday and I am on track.

I'm a 57 year old female with the typical sad dieting history. My first diet was at the ripe old age of 12. I lost 25 pounds which at 5'2" and 98 lbs. put me in the attractive teen girl category. This was the 70's and there were no 'big girl' clothes available in regular stores. From there it was a lifelong battle to keep my weight down. I've lost weight on Weight Watcher's, McDougall, Raw, lo carb, 17DD, etc. I'm certain I've tried almost every diet out there. Thanks to these diets and my own disordered eating habits I have 50+ pounds to lose. I'm desperate to get out of the food maze.

Some thoughts....

I'm obsessed with food! In addition to all the dieting, for the past 25 years I've been feeding a family which includes my husband and 3 sons who are now in their early 20's. One has moved out, and two are home attending community college. My husband and I are overweight but our boys are thin. All I do is think about food, from morning till evening! I have loads of cookbooks, I clip and print recipes like crazy. I grocery shop for entertainment.

There are a lot of eating disorders in my family and my husband's family. Ranging from anorexia, bulimia, morbid obesity, orthorexia, body hatred, obsessive exercising...we've seen it all. I'm the chronic dieter. This makes me very sad to think about.

I have a very 'diet-y' mentality (calories, points, carbs, sugar) but I'm ready to stop. I know I have a long way to go but I can only focus on today. I've committed to the vanilla S even though it scares me to have two S days in a row. I've ordered the book.

JJJPK · Post by **JJJPK** » Tue May 24, 2016 12:32 am

Welcome! I'm so glad you're here! You've come to the right place to mend your relationship with food! I too have yoyoed around a long time (even though I'm only fifteen, I can't imagine being in that cycle for 25 years!) and used to go through binge-fast cycles. I too was ready for a change! This really works. I understand that you are always thinking about food...me too! It starts to get a little better, you find things to do with your time that you didn't before. And you enjoy food more than you ever did before. Each and every meal is a big treat! Just be sure you don't wolf them down. Practice mindful eating. Drink with your meal. Chew...a lot. Talk to your family while you eat. Really savor it. If two S days in a row scares you just do Wednesday and Saturday or something. Make it work for you. Be gentle with yourself at first. Don't freak out if you eat a snack on an N day. Look for progress, not perfection. You'll get there, good luck!

Na Razie!

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Tue May 24, 2016 5:04 am

Thank you for the warm welcome, JJJPK. I appreciate all the advice and support! I wish I had your wisdom when I was fifteen.

Today was a pretty good N day. I enjoyed my meals a lot but I did have my side salad and veggie soup in separate dishes that wouldn't fit on my plate. I love veggies but they don't fill me up for long. I think that might change as I get used to eating less overall. Trying not to obsess over small details.

cocobea · Post by **cocobea** » Tue May 24, 2016 1:47 pm

e-lyn
hello! I feel like we have a lot in common. I'm 45, 2 kids (12 & 7) and a husband. I have tried so many diets while steadily putting weight on over the years. We can support each other here. I started yesterday. I had a good day and I'm feeling hopeful for today. I did read that when you are starting out don't be afraid to fill your plate. The key is to focus on the habit first. It already feels naughty to me to be eating carbs! Good luck to us both.

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Tue May 24, 2016 5:39 pm

Thanks, cocoabea! It seems like we're both ready to leave the extreme diets behind.

I've never had much success losing weight on low carb. The science behind it is quite convincing though, which leaves me feeling guilty for indulging even in whole grains. I keep reminding myself that I lost 60 pounds on Weight Watchers eating plenty of carbs. WW taught me what a portion looks like and for that I'm grateful. But I just can't bring myself to go down that road again.

After years of eating smallish meals and snacking heavily in between, I'm finding the larger meals a bit difficult to deal with. Even though I'm using a 9" plate and the portions are modest, my digestive tract is not happy. I don't have a gallbladder so that could be an issue. I hope not. I'm trying to slow down and chew my food really well.

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Fri Jun 03, 2016 9:51 pm

Hi, e-Lyn!(auto correct is balking). Please try not to worry too much about S days. If you are really not longing for anything that couldn't fit in a meal on either day, you aren't obligated to have something! Do your best to have generous meals with foods that will help you compensate for not having your usual extras and remind yourself often that you will be getting rid of just as much (if not more) misery as pleasure by fading out the disorder. And it doesn't have to happen fast. Most successful losers at ANY plan in general take a couple of years to work out the kinks even when they are pretty compliant. If you keep your eyes on the prize-eating sanity- it will help. It also helps to know you can be improving even if you strike out some days. Keep up with us! Link your daily check in, if you started one.

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Sat Jun 04, 2016 2:23 am

Thanks for the good advice, oolala!

Here's the link to my daily check in. https://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=10962

MaggieMae · Post by **MaggieMae** » Sat Jun 04, 2016 3:01 am

Hi elyn! We have a lot in common! I've tried everything, too. My mom put me on my first diet at the age of 9. My lifetime of diet head is hard to shake. Nos is the way to go. I've tried and failed many times, but I keep trying. Don't be hard on yourself! Mark a red day and move on, don't worry about perfection. Build good habits over time.Good luck! Enjoy your first s day!

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Sat Jun 04, 2016 7:18 am

Hi Maggie Mae...thanks for the encouragement! The routine of N days is getting a bit easier, but I seem to only manage 4 in a row before I cave in. I just finished reading the book and I see how important it is to just keep going.

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Tue Jun 07, 2016 4:50 pm

4 in a row is still something! Make Friday meal content as fun as you can within the guidelines for now and in your mind, maximize how much you enjoy the eating even without the extras. Minimize what you're missing out on. It really isn't much! Keep thinking about how different things will be in six months or a year.

e-lyn · Post by **e-lyn** » Wed Jun 08, 2016 3:34 am

Yes, oolala....I'm going to try again this week to keep Friday green. I might make some unsweetened iced tea to have in the evening. I'm thinking that may help take the edge off. It's been so hot here and the ice cream in my freezer has been calling my name, especially on the weekends.