Hi guys, how are you all? I really have missed you, this is such a friendly board to belong to!
Well, I have had lots going on lately- hubby lost his job a few months back, while he was job hunting the kiddos stayed at home w/him and I was the breadwinner for a while. Talk about stressful! But now he is back at work, the kids are back in day care, and I have had enough of the overwhelming and conflicting world of dieting! I tried Nutrisystem, WW, South Beach, you name it- always hungry and always wondering what would happen when I lost the weight- I really don't want to count points/calories/carbs/etc forever, thus I am pretty much guaranteed to put that weight all back on. So I started thinking back, to the few times when I lost weight successfully, and even further back, to the time before I was overweight. How did I get the weight off? How did I get bigger to begin with?
Well when I was a normal weight (up to about age 22), I ate what I wanted (sometimes home cooked meals, sometimes fast food), but I never snacked. I also would have one plate of food, and that was enough to keep me satisfied. I did not get formal exercise then, but being younger I do know I had more muscle on my body (esp core muscle) and I was able to keep that muscle by walking to classes, etc. I started gaining weight and became overweight over the period of a few years- how? Well, when I was eating in the cafeteria at school, I would go back for seconds and thirds, esp desserts. I also snacked a lot in my dorm (I took like 21 hours for a few semesters, very very stressful), plus I was always going out and eating lots of fast food, huge ice cream sundaes, etc. I did very little movement except walking to classes- I was too busy studying. What changed over those few years?? Well obviously (to me, at least) the fact I was doing lots more snacking, eating seconds, and eating sweets than I used to do. Plus I was getting older, my muscle was being replaced with fat, and I was not getting much actvity. One day I went for my annual and was told my triglycerides were sky high- and that I was headed for a heart attack if I kept it up. That scared the crud out of me! I asked the dr what I needed to do, all he said was "exercise at least 3 times per week, stop eating so much fast food, fatty food, and sweets". So at the time, I did not know what a calorie or carb gram was. What I ended up doing: I only ate 3 meals per day, sometimes I would get fast food, but most the time it was food from the cafeteria, I would occasionally eat sweets, but not in large portions, no seconds on sweets or plates of food. I also did Callanetics (built muscles back up) 3 times per week, and still walked to my classes. In six months, I had my blood chemistry under control, I dropped a few dress sizes, and I had lost 30 pounds! It was so very easy, and I was able to keep it off for quite a few years after that, until my lifestyle changed again and I slowly gained my weight back.
Thereafter followed years of weight gain/weight loss cycles, going on NUMEROUS diets to lose and then gain the weight back w/interest.
When I was 36, I lost a lot of weight once again. This time it was after I gave birth to my twins. During the pregnancy, I was sick a lot, ate whatever I could keep down, and gained weight (which is of course good at that point). A few months after the birth, I was SHOCKED to get on the scale and learn not only had I lost my pg weight, but 20 more pounds besides that. I was mystified at the time, but now I think I know the whys of that weight loss (and no, I was not breastfeeding, although I did initially pump for a little while to supplement formula feedings). I was not working out at the time (believe me, I was getting whatever sleep I could get), but I was only eating 3 times per day. I ate various things, some fast food, some frozen meals, some fresh meals, some sweets. I was not snacking at all (at least at first). Slowly I started to gain that weight all back though- I would run to the fridge for an ice cream cone when the babies slept, I would eat whatever snacks I could to keep me happy and moving along, I would eat seconds and thirds at meals- and I was not getting exercise, still.
Then I went back to work, and the cycle of dieting/deprivation/binging started up again and again. And that is where I have been for the past 2 years- I gear up for some diet, tell myself it will work that time, buy all the tools/food/etc come up w/an exercise plan... and then it all falls to pieces. Sometimes it takes a month for that to happen, sometimes not even a day.
I have been drawn time and again to No-S, especially seeing it work for everyone else, but I have been scared. Why? I am scared of "falling off the wagon" again, scared of being painfully hungry/nauseous between meals, scared that this will not work for me, scared that the plan is so simple there is no way it can work.
But even with all that, I have to try it again. I have to learn to be gentle with myself on days I do not do the plan 100%. I need to avoid my scale for several weeks so I do not get into the habit of daily weighing/daily frustrations. I need to learn patience to stick with this plan and see it work over the long term, rather than some 10 pounds in 2 weeks deal. Looking back at prior to weight problems and the only two times I have been successful at weight loss, I can now see quite clearly that formal diets have never (and will never) work for me, I have known all along the No-S principles and have been scared to trust them.
So, I am back.
Thanks for sticking with my very long post there
Deb