Everyday Systems

Hi there,

First, I have a question. I was driven to break troth with No-S twice this week for illness reasons (namely, a severe and chronic gastritis, which even despite prescription medication can sometimes only be soothed by food. It may sound by a lame excuse, but try out my stomach when it's angry and you'll see...). I know that sick days are officially S-Days, but I have been eager to chuck off the weight that I put back on during my month of re-settling and starting a new job, and I'd like to take Saturday and Sunday as N-Days to compensate for this week's sick days. Is this a bad idea?

Okay, here's why I'd like a little bit of support/input regarding the weekend.

This Sunday, I'm going to be at home to take care of a number of household tasks, namely assembling several pieces of furniture (my place is still rather empty even though I've been here over a month now) and cleaning. The main problem with this is that I'll be at home and hence tempted to munch. Even if I decree Sunday to technically be an S-Day, I don't want to go out of control. I've eliminated pretty much all but two of the potential foods upon which I could munch (I never have traditional snack/junk food around at all, but you'd be surprised what I'll munch on. Generally it happens when I'm lonely.).

I'm also a bit worried because I don't have anything lined up for Saturday night.

This is what I was planning on doing for this weekend to try and avoid problems.

(1) bringing those two foods to my office at work for the weekend so that they aren't there, or at least throwing them into the car I'm borrowing so that if I want them, I'll have to go out into the cold

(2) getting in some more intense exercise sessions--those tend to remind me that I like being fit

(3) getting some bubble bath and a good book or movie for Saturday night

(4) if I really start to go out of control Saturday night, go into work. This might sound super lame/weird, but in my profession, we don't really have well-defined hours and plenty of folks work at odd hours. I've got a heck of a lot of reading to do for my job, anyway.

(5) Calling up a friend on Saturday night if I feel bummed

This isn't really relevant to overeating, but I'm planning to limit my internet use this weekend in order to focus on the tasks that need to be done (namely building a bunch of stuff and reading a bunch of technical literature for my job).

At the end of next week I plan to weigh myself and take my measurements--if I'm as good as I was before I moved, I'll be psyched. (And if I'm not? I don't know how I'll feel. Probably sad.) Right now, I'm not reporting anything because when I'm on my cycle I'm a walking water sack.

I hope you all have a good weekend.

--H

Several things...

First, I really liked the podcast that R did on strictness, and one of the points he made in particular: no punishment or make-up days (and he gives lots of good reasons). So, I have personally been resisting the urge to make S days into N days to "make up." And ESPECIALLY for a sick day - they're legit!! Forgive yourself, and move on. No need to "make it up." Really. (I am telling myself this too... this was not a good week for me either.)

Now, keeping S-days from becoming total binges is a different thing! And I'm right there with you. I think you have some good strategies in mind - things that are pleasures for your soul, so that you don't drop into eating out of habit or default. Bubble baths. Maybe flowers or scented candles. Things that address the senses OTHER than taste.

One other strategy that sometimes works for me is to get one really serious indulgence that I can look forward to, and plan it for the evening - something that isn't a binge, but a little bit of something wonderful. Small amounts of something REALLY good can (sometimes) satisfy more than lots of junk.

Good luck. Just be gentle with yourself, okay? I remember when you just moved, and were beating yourself up so much... you really seem to have pulled yourself out of that, but I'm not sure you've acknowledged what a great accomplishment that was.

Hang in there.

Hexagon,

Ditto to KCCC's last comment. You're doing great. And don't forget that No-S is a lifestyle, not a diet. You WILL lose the weight if you stick with it (even with sick days!)

Take your S days, and remember that even if it's not this weigh-in, someday you will make it to your goal!

Z.

Hexagon,

I'm just going to reiterate what KCCC and zoolina said: sick days are legitimate S days, there's no need to trade. Relax and enjoy. You're in this for the long haul, a couple of sick days aren't going to make a difference -- unless by overcompensating you knock yourself totally off course. The danger is behavioral, not caloric.

Trading is dangerous. Especially trading an entire weekend. It breeds confusion and resentment. And it's hard to do, your extra credit may wind up making you feel like you failed if you can't quite pull it off.

Better would be, stick with you plans for avoiding problems over the weekend (sound like great ideas no matter what). Plus give yourself one small, deliberate, rewarding treat each day. That way you enjoy the S days that are your right and your crutch to make it through the week without an orgy of calories.

Reinhard

I'm going to chime in with the others and agree that I think you should keep your S-Days sacred.

Another thing that jumped out at me was when you said if the scale or tape measure reflected a loss, you'd be psyched--otherwise, you'd be sad. Why set yourself up for possible disappointment? You might not be this way, but I know if it were me, and I had been faithfully following the plan expecting (or just really desiring) to lose fill in the blank pounds by such and such a time, and the number on the scale didn't parse with my expectations, I'd be inclined to say, "Well, this obviously isn't working!" Then I'd feel emotionally distraught.

Perhaps you can find another yardstick for measuring your progress--like rewarding yourself with a special treat that has nothing to do with food after you've adhered to the No-S behaviors for a specified amount of time. Or considering how this plan makes you FEEL on a day-to-day basis--both physically and emotionally.

I guess what I'm really trying to say is I think it would be beneficial for you to change your focus--relax into this as a lifestyle change and celebrate the gradual changes in your physical size. I think if you'll stop thinking about the actual numbers altogether, you'll find the weight will magically take care of itself.