Everyday Systems

I'm curious about the parents here (and I'm one).

Let's say that yes, you believe that eating three meals a day and saving snacking for special days is the way to go.

Do you encourage that in your kids as well?

I ask because I was just out with my son and we passed a Ben and Jerry's store. It's not what I would consider an "S" day, but it is a slightly unusual day, as my son came in to work with me. Without thinking, I asked my son, who doesn't often get sweets, mind, if he'd like an ice cream cone.

He said yes, and I bought him one, though did not have one myself, it not being an "S" day. Then I got to thinking about it and what kind of example and habits I'm encouraging in my son.

Now, his diet miles better than most children his age what with the bento lunches heavy on the veggies and the fact I don't buy prepacked stuff, but it did really get me to wondering.

We try very hard to stick to S days for treats here. During the Summer I allow one more S per week because of the ice cream man being around etc, but generally we do *attempt* to keep our sweets and snacks for the weekend. It works well and usually we consider these days even more special and "party" like!

The first year that Richie and I started with NoS, he had a bit of a belly and a huuuuge problem with sweets.. Was eating them every day. I was overeating in general.. By simply getting the sweets a bit more under control, at the end of the year, he had lost almost three inches of "baby fat" from his waist and was very healthy and slim.

As far as I'm concerned, it's just as much an issue for children and even more important that they have some kind of sane guidelines to use, because the proliferation of snacking in this culture in the past twenty years has gotten way out of control..

Just an extra bit of info here on the sweets.
This July Richie signed up for a little Summer course at the school which he will attend in September. He chose three classes.
Gadgets and Gizmos, a cool class about making different inventions, Jazz Band, and Cool and Delicious...
Well to my dissapointment, I found he would be eating small amounts of dessert almost five days a week in this class, which basically taught how to make a bunch of variations on frozen chocolate mousse pie, or cheesecake, or oreo cake, etc...
Ack! I wasn't going to *order* him to change his choice, but I knew where it would lead. And I said as soon as the class was finished he would have to go straight back to saving desserts for S days, to which he agreed. Sure enough, as I predicted, he did gain a bit of weight, and that was with being pretty active and swimming and biking and being an 11 year old with a great metabolism.
Fortunately it was a contained thing and only lasted five weeks.
But had he continued like this, he certainly would be up a lot of weight at the end of the year, and we all know how incredibly hard it is to lose it once you gain it..

In your case, I wouldn't be extremely concerned as you mentioned he is not big into having a lot of sweets, and it was kind of like a special day.
The whole thing is to be making conscious choices when you have S days, and not let them just happen randomly whenever the situation arises..
If we did that, then we'd be having S days every time we went to a market and passed the cookie aisle!

How old is your Son?
I say it's a good thing to involve him and encourage healthy habits at an early age!
Wow I bet he loves the Bento lunches! Nice!
I'm gonna have to get my hands on some of those this year for us!
Peace and Love,
Debs

He's twelve and no, he's not a compulsive eater by any means. He loves his starches, and will go nuts with the bread if offered an opportunity, but he isn't offered one. He doesn't have a weight problem at all, and understands portion control better than I did at his age!

Yes, bento are amazing fun. It's a great way to enjoy a pleasing meal. I got a kick out of watching my blond, blue-eyed kid tuck into his rice with chopsticks when we ate lunch together today.

I was thin as a kid in the 80s and 90s. And I believe these are the reasons why:

1) I was involved in organized sports 5 days a week
2) t.v. was limited to one hour a day
3) I ate 3 meals a day, all home cooked. McDonald's was a once every two month treat
4) I often had one small snack after school, it was healthy and small
5) sweets were a special treat, can't say exactly how often, but definitely not everyday
6) I played outside a lot, rode my bike, skated, tree-house etc. instead of tv (I never see kids in my neighborhood outside nowadays, probably a safety issue)
7) my parents didn't keep junk food in the house: soda, chips, pre-packaged processed food, candy, etc.
eating out was a Friday night treat, not an everyday occurrence

now if I could get back to this as an adult

We eat healthy meals, and he understands about nutrition pretty well for his age. He knows that he needs two fruits/veg per meal, plus carb and protein. Soda (Sprite only) is a special-occasion treat. Fast food is rare. He mostly drinks water and milk.

I do allow snacks (on request, not offered), b/c he has such crazy growth spurts at this age. But snacks are fruit or sometimes cheese, yogurt, or nuts. Not junk.

Where we fall down is sweets. Unfortunately, my husband does not set a good example here, and it makes it hard to enforce good habits for my son. He is used to "dessert every night." Sigh. What I do is keep portions very small (for example, two Hershey's kisses are a dessert), and emphasize "healthy food first." I'm also trying to break the dessert habit by saying that "this is not a dessert night" a few nights a week. (And there are a lot of nights he doesn't ask... so I don't offer.)

It's a fine line between trying to provide good nutrition and trying to keep sweets from becoming a forbidden attraction that he'll eat tons of when he can just b/c he can, kwim?

Fortunately, he doesn't seem to fall into that - sometimes he'll leave part of a dessert when he gets full, which always gladdens my heart. (I see it as evidence that he's "listening to his body.") He is very healthy and active, and has no weight problem at all. So, we're not perfect, but I think we're doing okay.

I have a 3yo ds and a 1yo dd. We save sweets for our 'special treat days' (s days) but there are the occasional m&m's as a reward for good behavior on a long shopping trip.
My kids still need a few snacks a day, with their little tummies, but I definitely will encourage a healthy eating style, like the NoS as they age.

My high school age daughter/athelete has recently started no-S ing because it helps her keep her weight where she wants it, it's simple, and she feels better a little hungry (better for sports, better for paying attention in school).

While it does feel strange to put a kid on a "diet," the No-S rules are close enough to traditional normalcy that it might not be a bad idea. I wouldn't force the issue, but you can go a long way just by providing a positive structure: your good example, preparing 3 meals a day, and keeping a snack/sweet bare cupboard during the week. The simplicity and clarity of No-S make it easy for kids to understand (even a toddler can understand meals and treats -- try explaining calories), and the S-day exception lets them enjoy plenty of yummy kiddie food without it becoming a problem.

Our eldest (she was a tiny little preemie) is still so skinny that we have precisely the opposite concern, and our youngest is still a little baby, so I can't speak from experience yet.

Reinhard

My daughter is eight years old and she isn't too prone to snacking, although I do give her a tablespoon of PB a couple of days a week before she goes to gymnastics since dinner is late on those days. It's important to remember that small children tend to have fast metabolisms and small stomachs. They may find it hard to eat enough if they are restricted to three largish feedings.

--david