Everyday Systems

And I'm not coping with it well! Really it was a minor derailment at first...I had to get up WAY earlier than usual and basically ended up eating two breakfasts before 9 a.m., but then I let it turn into a "what the f*ck" day. That, coupled with some quality time in the 3-way mirror while shopping at Macy's, has triggered a bunch of diet thinking, planning how I can restrict tomorrow, obsessing over my body, and blah blah blah boringcakes. Now it's bed time and I'm stuffed and I need to just let it go, go to bed, and have a regular day tomorrow.

How do other people cope with red/failure days? I guess like everything it takes practice?

Gingercake,

I find little slip ups to be the hardest thing about No S. I tend to also think: "hey, I've messed up, I guess now I can go whole hog." Yuck.

So what I do, which usually (but not always ) works is have a "No Binge Failure" tag on my habit cal.

So say a co-worker brings chocolates to my desk and I take one and whoops-failure! What I do is give myself a red day for No S, BUT if I go the rest of the day without any slip ups, I give myself a green on the No Binge Failure calander.

I've actually found that getting a green on the No Binge tag is a LOT harder than just getting a green for a day of perfect no-sing. So when I"m able to get back on track I feel, paradoxically enough, that I have been extremley sucessful.

Good luck with the struggle!

Betty

Hi Gingercake,

I actually think Bettys's system is great! I stole the idea after she's shared it on some other thread (thanks Betty!) and find it really helpful. I now use the no binge HabitCal for my Sdays and red days. (It helps me a lot to stay reasonable on Sdays too)

When I had my first slip up after first successful 17 days I also went onto a "I blew it anyway" binge and struggled for two days to get back on track. But I haven't had a red day since and I had less binge Sdays since and it is getting easier.
Try not to beat yourself up for it, try to get back on track as soon as you can - after all it's all about developing a habit, so a red day can be a successful day towards developing your habit when you manage to stick to at least some of the noS rules!

Good luck!

I think if we've dieted a lot in our lives we tend to try to do everything "perfectly". We call eating off our diets a failure, and so then once we think we've failed, well, "might as well really enjoy myself before I start again..."

The way I look at it is that this is for life. I'm alive, aren't I? Then I guess I didn't fail. It's going to take a lot more than one bad day of eating to kill me. Even thin people eat too much sometimes. They just don't get up and do it again for (___) days in a row. Ease up on yourself. You're doing great!

I listen to the "Strictness" podcast - one of my absolute favorites - particularly the section about "no retribution."

I recommend it highly.

It took me a long while to quit turning small failures into big ones. You're at the first stage: honest recognition.

Sending lots of encouragement for "next steps."

I have had a ton of red days, but overall, I'm doing so well and maintaining the 3 lbs I initally lost. With No-S it's so easy to pick yourself up and try again. And overall I'm eating so much better than I had been and my habits are so improved. So a red day here and there is no big deal. Just keep going!

Oh and reading people's inspriring stories on here also helps with motivation to keep going and trying again.

Thanks all for the encouragements. Today is going fine so far. I even walked to the super pricey organic produce market and got some beautiful produce items and a really wonderful loaf of artisan bread and made my lunch from that. So I'm trying to do the oposite of punishment and just enjoy my food as I should.

(And I agree that the "strictness" podcast is great...makes so much sense.)

I remind myself that a) I'm not trying to be perfect and b) I'm not perfect at anything I do -- nor do I want to be.

I just love the No Binge Failure idea and I'm going to put it on my HabitCal right away. It makes real sense

CrazyCatLady said:

Part of the beauty of No S is that I really learn from my mistakes.

I have to really say this is one of the best parts of NO S for me. Rather than someone else TELLING ME WHAT TO EAT and HOW MUCH I get to use these guidelines to make my own choices and learn from my own mistakes.

Whether its portion size, a particular food I just don't like or doesn't settle well with me, whatever it is, I learn from my mistakes and I can see how over the long run all of this adds up and we learn to feed ourselves well.

Blueskighs

Betty, I think your nobinge failure chart is a great idea. I have trouble with weekends, and that should help a lot - I'm going tyo set it up right now. Thanks a lot.