Everyday Systems

Hi all-

I'm almost two weeks into my No-S life. So far, so great! But today, an S day for me, I've felt a little out of control. I'm not comfortable with "unplanned eating." How do all you pros keep S days from being all out binges? (I'm especially asking those who have a history of binge eating.) I know that Reinhard addresses this in his book. I'm trying hard "not to be an idiot" today, but old habits are hard to break!!

Please advise. Thanks.

-habitualrunner

Maybe something from the thread I started on social situations might help. http://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=4095

I tend to really pig out at parties & one or two people suggested using the "one plate" rule there for whatever snacks & treats I want to eat there. Even though it's not a meal, knowing that there's a "limit" to what I'm taking (rather than limitless grazing, LOL!) is a helpful idea to me. Maybe if you did something like that with snacks--kind of decide what special treats you want for between 2 meals or the day, whatever works, and have it plated & then snack off that plate. Then you enjoy some treats but it has some parameters that help you too.

What's your biggest problem area--snacks, sweets, or seconds? That might help people in giving advice here too.

Hope you find some good solutions! Merry

habitualrunner,

for me it really is about ENJOYING my food, I have and do and will overeat on S days, not every S day and some overeating is definitely ok,

but the truth is if you really focus on ENJOYING your S day, it will make a big difference, it is really hard to ENJOY eating that is rapid and too great in volume. If you start paying attention and really ALLOW yourself to SLOW DOWN and really ENJOY you will find that your pleasure does not require as much food and you will feel more satisfied.

I think its really the key, binging is ESCAPING/dissasociating/not being present, that is not ENJOYING, enjoying REQUIRES being present, aware and fully conscious,

I really don't use any other parameter on my S days,

Blueskighs

Blueskighs, thanks for your post. I have to tell you, I've been reading about the rules that some people have for S days, and it makes me *feel* like they are changing everything to make it a diet. I even had some weightwatchers flashbacks! I'm not saying this is how it seems to them, just how it feels for me.

My BFF is a "normal" eater. She eats pretty big meals, and if she knows she's having dessert, she picks something smaller for her meal. She mostly chooses healthier foods because she is prone to higher cholesterol. However, her mom is european, and HER attitude is "moderation, moderation, moderation!" Since she's approaching 90, she did something right in her life!

My goal is to be like my friend and her mom in how I feel about food.

Incidentally, when we got to school together, my friend learned about some snack food that they only had in our area. She went bananas for it for awhile. She ate this particular snack food (a sweet cake in a small package) almost every day. But she'd have one a day, not 5 or 6. And after a few weeks of this, she said, "you know what, they really aren't that great. Why am I eating these?" And she never looked back.

This was my first S weekend, and I won't say I went bananas, but I ate more sweets than I normally do (I'm really a salt girl.) But the funny thing is I'm really looking forward to tomorrow, an N day! I reminded myself that this is like riding a bike, and I might fall down a few times before it becomes second nature.

At least I'm not miserable!

Thanks for joining in a discussion with me. Something about being able to post a note/question here in this forum in the middle of the day really turned my day around. I even went out to dinner with friends tonight and had a wonderful Peruvian meal. On the drive home I thought about how I technically (because it's an S day) could come home and eat more if I wanted to. But then that wasn't really so appealing when I got home (I knew I wouldn't sleep well or feel good tomorrow) and so I now I'm going off to bed with a generally peaceful heart. I'm looking forward to my N tomorrow!

This was my 2nd S days, last week I ate S days like N days.
I really thought about the whole concept of this diet, and I came to the conclusion, that I can have SOME not ALL I want.
I can have 1 piece of cake, not the whole cake. If I can have 1 piece I don't need/want the whole cake.
what a freeing concept that was. So I had some hot chocolate this weekend, and enjoyed every sip, and had no guilt.
I don't keep any snacks or sweets in the house now, and since town is 25 miles away, I'm pretty safe during the weekends. I really want to do Nos and I'm willing to do what ever it takes to lose weight. This is my last chance, there is no room for errors or binging. Its do or die this time, I'm committed, and not going to blow it by over eating anything. I made a promise to myself that I will eat Nos for the rest of my life, one meal at a time.

Blueskighs, thanks for your post. I have to tell you, I've been reading about the rules that some people have for S days, and it makes me *feel* like they are changing everything to make it a diet. I even had some weightwatchers flashbacks! I'm not saying this is how it seems to them, just how it feels for me.

clicklbd,

i am glad if it was helpful. Some of Kathleen's questions on the Daily Check-In have got me to thinking about the attitudes I have used during NO S. but truthfully I have to give just about 100% credit for the "freedom" on my S days to my husband he is truly my NO S "coach", even though he is not a noser himself.

I really enjoyed your story about your best friend and the snack cakes. When i first started No S we went to eat donuts at a local donut shop every saturday and sunday, it took me about 4 months? to reach that point that you're friend got to in a few weeks -

"you know what, they really aren't that great. Why am I eating these?" And she never looked back.

it seems like the "diet mentality" of external "no,no,no" never allows us to go through that natural cycle of wanting something, enjoying it, getting tired of it and then moving on. your story about your friend is such an excellent example of this, thank you for sharing it!

Blueskighs

Habitualrunner,

Not sure if you saw/heard this podcast:

http://everydaysystems.com/podcast/episode.php?id=34

It covers the subject in a little more detail than the book (and will certainly make it into the next edition if there ever is one!)

I think blueskighs nailed the most important point: worry less about "being an idiot" than about positively enjoying S-days. It may take a little while to retrain yourself to be able to get to this point, but it's very possible, and very worth it.

Reinhard

blueskighs wrote: I really enjoyed your story about your best friend and the snack cakes. When i first started No S we went to eat donuts at a local donut shop every saturday and sunday, it took me about 4 months? to reach that point that you're friend got to in a few weeks -

I read your blog when I first learned about no-s. I found it very useful (I wanted you to know that!) in getting started. And I remember your donut thing. I've been avoiding salty snacks because I'm a little afraid if I have some, I will not stop. But maybe I need to do that for a few weekends to get over it. It's kind of a scary thought, but hopefully I'll feel brave enough to do it soon.

I did go through this in my early adulthood with ice cream sandwiches. Every time I bought them, I ate a whole box. Flash back to my childhood -- my mother LOVED ice cream sandwiches and would not let me have any. I was 5'4" and 130 pounds, which to her, was fat (gee, I wonder why I have weight issues now) so ice cream sandwiches had a HUGE power over me. It wasn't until I bought several boxes and gave myself permission to eat them ALL that I learned that I didn't really like them that much. I think I threw a few boxes away after that!

Reinhard-

Thanks for directing me to the podcasts. I didn't even know about them! #34 was very helpful.

Cheers,
habitualrunner

clicklbd,

thank you for your kind words about my blog,

Blueskighs