Okay I feel badly because the only time I seem to post is when I'm complaining but I'm just really feeling frustrated again....
I've been doing this pretty consistently for about a month and weighed myself for the first day today. I gained 2 lbs!
I haven't been perfectly strict but I still felt like I was eating a lot less overall than before so I'm just feeling really confused. I missed a couple of weeks of exercising because I was sick but now I'm back to exercising.
I do feel much better about my crazy food issues and don't obsess about food like I usually do so that is amazing but I'm 60 lbs overweight and this is just ridiculous. I can't go back to traditional dieting. I know I won't last more than a day on that and I don't want to have to count every calorie that's on my plate but I guess I could try to eat a little bit less fat for break and lunch?
I just don't know what to do! On top of it my best friend is having martial problems and feeling really stressed. She lost 15 lbs like overnight and I'm trying to concentrate on helping her w/ her problems but I can't help but feeling jealous esp since I keep gaining!
What should I do? Hang in there, give up, starve myself????? HELP!!!!!!!!!!
Linda :}
Should I give up?? :/
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
Well, if you're taking a vote, my vote is "hang in there." 
You said it yourself - talking about how differently you feel. THAT is worth it's weight in gold right there!
Over time, weight will ebb and flow before it drops. Two pounds is nothing - could just be a fluke of the scale. But wouldn't you have gained during that time if you hadn't been doing No-S? (I would have - off No-S, I can put on 10 lbs without blinking.)
It takes time for your body to get the message. It takes time for your emotional self, which does a lot of the eating, to get the message. Give yourself that time.
Later, you can tweak. But do "21 days straight" first, then tweak.
And do stick around. Post some successes, too - accomplishments are worth celebrating.
PS - I am also struggling a bit right now, because life is a bit stressful. And to be honest, I thought I was "past that point." (Perhaps one never completely is... just seeing "that point" from a new perspective. Tonight's "binge" wouldn't even have registered two years ago.) My two-pronged strategy is "back to the daily log for 21 days" and "plan meals I love." So maybe we can support each other.
You said it yourself - talking about how differently you feel. THAT is worth it's weight in gold right there!
Over time, weight will ebb and flow before it drops. Two pounds is nothing - could just be a fluke of the scale. But wouldn't you have gained during that time if you hadn't been doing No-S? (I would have - off No-S, I can put on 10 lbs without blinking.)
It takes time for your body to get the message. It takes time for your emotional self, which does a lot of the eating, to get the message. Give yourself that time.
Later, you can tweak. But do "21 days straight" first, then tweak.
And do stick around. Post some successes, too - accomplishments are worth celebrating.
PS - I am also struggling a bit right now, because life is a bit stressful. And to be honest, I thought I was "past that point." (Perhaps one never completely is... just seeing "that point" from a new perspective. Tonight's "binge" wouldn't even have registered two years ago.) My two-pronged strategy is "back to the daily log for 21 days" and "plan meals I love." So maybe we can support each other.
I agree with KCCC. Don't worry too much about the scale at this point - that could just be fluid fluctuation or whatever. Just focus on the habit building and the freedom that gives you around food. It seems like this is a stressful time for many of us on the list for one reason or another and that is giving some of us a chance to observe what we do under stress - what our behavioural/eating patterns are. Knowledge is power, as they say. If we can see how we behave, then we have a chance to behave differently - with intention rather than blindly. And NoS gives you the space to do that. Hang in there. You have already listed some of the benefits you have found on NoS - focus on those and just keep quietly plodding along. My weight's been pretty stable over the last few months, but my wellbeing and my health have improved enormously. My nutrition is good, my exercise is mostly good (despite a few dips here and there! 
); I'm calmer and feel more in control and better about myself. That's worth it even without the weight loss - yet my weight is slowly going down. I know if I weren't doing NoS it would be slowly - and inevitably - going up. So there you go - I'll stop rambling now. Hope you do hang about and keep posting.
); I'm calmer and feel more in control and better about myself. That's worth it even without the weight loss - yet my weight is slowly going down. I know if I weren't doing NoS it would be slowly - and inevitably - going up. So there you go - I'll stop rambling now. Hope you do hang about and keep posting. 
Yes .. I totally agree with KCCC and funfuture ... "hang in there" is the thing to do.
I have found that one of the major strengths of No-S is that, even when the Titanic is sinking around you and the stress levels are off the charts, No-S is the life-preserver that you can cling to, because it's so simple and clear.
I can be totally crazed and reaching for the Oreos, but I draw back within myself, focus, and say "I eat three meals a day, and I don't eat between meals" and that somehow makes me able to (a) resist the Oreos and (b) emerge as a stronger person to deal with the stress. Somehow, making that one small decision to handle my food life the No-S way, makes me better able to handle the many non-food issues that arise.
It's wonderful, of course, to see pounds lost on the scale, but to me, the real point of No-S is to first re-architect the way you deal with food, which in my case has made me re-architect the way I deal with stress ... then deal with the scale.
If I didn't lose another pound for the rest of my life, although I am sure that I ultimately will, the No-S approach has brought me such peace and confidence, that I will continue on with it. Not without some rough patches and lapses, I know ... but for me there is a kind of bedrock, basic feeling, that No-S is a way of life that I can count on myself to practice, and when I fall off the cliff, come back to.
Yikes! Too serious? Don't quit, and keep coming back to these boards. I get a lot out of reading the posts of others, but also ... submitting my own posts ... forces me to not only to express my feelings, but also to focus on what I feel about those feelings ...
I have found that one of the major strengths of No-S is that, even when the Titanic is sinking around you and the stress levels are off the charts, No-S is the life-preserver that you can cling to, because it's so simple and clear.
I can be totally crazed and reaching for the Oreos, but I draw back within myself, focus, and say "I eat three meals a day, and I don't eat between meals" and that somehow makes me able to (a) resist the Oreos and (b) emerge as a stronger person to deal with the stress. Somehow, making that one small decision to handle my food life the No-S way, makes me better able to handle the many non-food issues that arise.
It's wonderful, of course, to see pounds lost on the scale, but to me, the real point of No-S is to first re-architect the way you deal with food, which in my case has made me re-architect the way I deal with stress ... then deal with the scale.
If I didn't lose another pound for the rest of my life, although I am sure that I ultimately will, the No-S approach has brought me such peace and confidence, that I will continue on with it. Not without some rough patches and lapses, I know ... but for me there is a kind of bedrock, basic feeling, that No-S is a way of life that I can count on myself to practice, and when I fall off the cliff, come back to.
Yikes! Too serious? Don't quit, and keep coming back to these boards. I get a lot out of reading the posts of others, but also ... submitting my own posts ... forces me to not only to express my feelings, but also to focus on what I feel about those feelings ...
Well said! That's definitely one of the reasons I write so much. I'd like to think my writing is helpful to others too - as their posts are to me - but it's also personal therapy!winnie96 wrote:Yikes! Too serious? Don't quit, and keep coming back to these boards. I get a lot out of reading the posts of others, but also ... submitting my own posts ... forces me to not only to express my feelings, but also to focus on what I feel about those feelings ...
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Blithe Morning
- Posts: 1221
- Joined: Wed Apr 02, 2008 10:56 pm
- Location: South Dakota
It would seem to me that you've lost more (crazy food issuse) than you gained (2 lbs, assuming that this 2lbs is really permanent).
Just keep going. Try to tighten up on vanilla No S (you mention "not be strict") and get back to exercising. No S is simple but it isn't always easy.
If you feel like you need to cut back on fat, then do so, but I personally don't much care for low fat versions of food. It's just best to eat a smaller portion of that and a larger portion of something else.
Just keep going. Try to tighten up on vanilla No S (you mention "not be strict") and get back to exercising. No S is simple but it isn't always easy.
If you feel like you need to cut back on fat, then do so, but I personally don't much care for low fat versions of food. It's just best to eat a smaller portion of that and a larger portion of something else.
Re: Should I give up?? :/
I hope you hang in there! Do you track with habitcal? I find that really helps me know what I've done and when & if I'm following things. If you aren't doing that, maybe giving that a try will help you tighten up on days that you felt weren't as "strictly" adhering to the plan.
Merry
Merry
Homeschool Mom and No S returnee as of 11-30-15.
2 years and counting on No-S.
29 lbs. down, 34 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
Respect Moderation
2 years and counting on No-S.
29 lbs. down, 34 to go. Slow and steady wins the race.
Respect Moderation
Thanks for everyone's response. I'm just really frustrated. I could handle not losing much weight but gaining is hard esp when my weight is at an all time high. I just feel like my body is out of control and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think I should give up and just accept myself the way I am but its' really hard when I'm almost 200 lbs and I'm only 5'3". Most of my life I weighed between 125-135 and I was still always trying to lose weight. It's just ridiculous and it feels like a merry go round that never stops.
Part of me says I should just live at the gym, really restrict my eating and give it everything I have till I reach my goals and part of me thinks it's all just so crazy to have to put off your life because of a number on the scale.
I'm just feeling lost and confused. Last time I was perfect on this for 3 months and my weight was actually up a few lbs from when I first started after just a week vacation and now this.
To top it off my best friend came over and used my scale last night and was like "oh look at how much weight I've lost". I'm really annoyed because she knows how I'm struggling right now.
I just don't know what to do anymore.....
Part of me says I should just live at the gym, really restrict my eating and give it everything I have till I reach my goals and part of me thinks it's all just so crazy to have to put off your life because of a number on the scale.
I'm just feeling lost and confused. Last time I was perfect on this for 3 months and my weight was actually up a few lbs from when I first started after just a week vacation and now this.
To top it off my best friend came over and used my scale last night and was like "oh look at how much weight I've lost". I'm really annoyed because she knows how I'm struggling right now.
I just don't know what to do anymore.....
Well, I'm sorry you didn't see a striking loss, but 2 pounds is not really very significant. Unless you are measuring very regularly and tracking the moving average, it's very possible that this isn't real weight gain.
You say you've got the compliance down pretty tight, which is great. You also say you're pretty confident that you're eating less. As long as you're not also moving less (sounds like this might have been an issue?), you should, over time lose weight. There's no magic here.
If you are worried that maybe excess is creeping in somehow, your literal compliance with the rules should make it easy to identify where. Are your firsts still on the enormous side? Do you drink gallons of orange juice between meals? Are there more than say 2 non weekend special days a month? Are routine S-days pretty crazy? If you do put your finger on something, you can always build on the basic no-s structure you already have. But don't go on a witch hunt. Maybe your eating really is moderate and all you need is more time and (perhaps) a touch more regularity in your exercise. Some people are lucky and lose significant weight right away, but many people have posted here that it took MONTHS for them to see results. Moderation can be very slow. But eating immoderately little to lose weight more quickly is a recipe for disaster.
Reinhard
You say you've got the compliance down pretty tight, which is great. You also say you're pretty confident that you're eating less. As long as you're not also moving less (sounds like this might have been an issue?), you should, over time lose weight. There's no magic here.
If you are worried that maybe excess is creeping in somehow, your literal compliance with the rules should make it easy to identify where. Are your firsts still on the enormous side? Do you drink gallons of orange juice between meals? Are there more than say 2 non weekend special days a month? Are routine S-days pretty crazy? If you do put your finger on something, you can always build on the basic no-s structure you already have. But don't go on a witch hunt. Maybe your eating really is moderate and all you need is more time and (perhaps) a touch more regularity in your exercise. Some people are lucky and lose significant weight right away, but many people have posted here that it took MONTHS for them to see results. Moderation can be very slow. But eating immoderately little to lose weight more quickly is a recipe for disaster.
Reinhard
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Too solid flesh
- Posts: 639
- Joined: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:22 pm
- Location: England
Should I give up?? :/
I'm so sorry that you're having such a hard time.
What everyone else says about hanging on makes sense. Fast dieting weight loss is unmaintainable for most people. Moderation can be frustratingly slow at times, but it seems to me that the alternatives are worse.
I hope that things look up for you soon.
What everyone else says about hanging on makes sense. Fast dieting weight loss is unmaintainable for most people. Moderation can be frustratingly slow at times, but it seems to me that the alternatives are worse.
I hope that things look up for you soon.
Here's what I'd do:
1. Stop focusing on the scale -- in fact, throw the danged thing out or at least make it very difficult to get to.
2. Focus on the good habits and exercise.
3. Let the weight take care of itself.
Concentrate on what you need to do, not the results. The results will come -- maybe slowly, but they will come.
1. Stop focusing on the scale -- in fact, throw the danged thing out or at least make it very difficult to get to.
2. Focus on the good habits and exercise.
3. Let the weight take care of itself.
Concentrate on what you need to do, not the results. The results will come -- maybe slowly, but they will come.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
thank you reinhard and wosnes.
I know 2 lbs is not a big deal. I've been dieting since I was 10 so know all about water retention and weight fluctuations and all that. It's just really scary gaining 60 lbs in 10 years and it feels like every time I blink I gain another 10 lbs. I'm not in a hurry but it's just really scaring me that no matter what I seem to do the weight creeps up in the wrong direction. I guess I'm just kind of in panic mode because I know from experience extreme dieting backfires on me but now it seems that moderation and good sense aren't helping me either so I'm starting to feel like I have no choice in the matter and that's not a good feeling at all.
The last 10 years have been really hard w/ us moving 5 times, having two kids, residency, fellowship and culinary school--yikes! I think I'm just having a badly needed wake up call. During that time I was trying to do this size acceptance thing too and it seemed like a good thing, but here I am 60 lbs heavier and now I see that I made a mistake.
I tend to be one extreme or the other so I think NoS is really good for me. Why do I have to either starve or eat everything in sight? This is the middle ground I need and I'm going to stick to it. Maybe a little more religiously and probably a little less fat (my body seems to do better w/ a bit less. I may go back to my vegetarian diet for a little bit too. My kids are in school now and instead of jumping into a business like I was planning too, I think I'm going to take this opportunity to focus on getting myself in the best shape I can. I'm going to spend some serious time in the gym and just stay on track with my NoS eating.
Okay that's probably way more than you all wanted to know about me but thank you for letting me vent!
L
I know 2 lbs is not a big deal. I've been dieting since I was 10 so know all about water retention and weight fluctuations and all that. It's just really scary gaining 60 lbs in 10 years and it feels like every time I blink I gain another 10 lbs. I'm not in a hurry but it's just really scaring me that no matter what I seem to do the weight creeps up in the wrong direction. I guess I'm just kind of in panic mode because I know from experience extreme dieting backfires on me but now it seems that moderation and good sense aren't helping me either so I'm starting to feel like I have no choice in the matter and that's not a good feeling at all.
The last 10 years have been really hard w/ us moving 5 times, having two kids, residency, fellowship and culinary school--yikes! I think I'm just having a badly needed wake up call. During that time I was trying to do this size acceptance thing too and it seemed like a good thing, but here I am 60 lbs heavier and now I see that I made a mistake.
I tend to be one extreme or the other so I think NoS is really good for me. Why do I have to either starve or eat everything in sight? This is the middle ground I need and I'm going to stick to it. Maybe a little more religiously and probably a little less fat (my body seems to do better w/ a bit less. I may go back to my vegetarian diet for a little bit too. My kids are in school now and instead of jumping into a business like I was planning too, I think I'm going to take this opportunity to focus on getting myself in the best shape I can. I'm going to spend some serious time in the gym and just stay on track with my NoS eating.
Okay that's probably way more than you all wanted to know about me but thank you for letting me vent!
L
You go!
You go girl! You are worth it. . . and we all have to take care of ourselves first or we won't be in any condition to take care of anyone or anything else! I hear you about the blinking and there's 10 more pounds; we can do this-a la Helen Reddy--"I am woman, hear me roar!"
Put on your own mask first!
Hang in there!
Put on your own mask first!
Hang in there!
LA Loser. . . well on my way to becoming an LA Winner. 
One more thing -- are you exercising? I can attribute my entire weight gain to less movement in the course of daily living. My eating hasn't changed much, if at all, over time. Well, it has. I eat less and I eat better. The big difference was the change in daily habits which resulted in less exercise.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."
Hi Wosnes,
I was exercising moderately for 3-4 days a week but got sick and didn't exercise for 2 weeks.
But I'm going to really up the exercise level. I literally decided to put everything else off for the next year and just focus on getting in the best shape possible. My kids are in school now so I'm fortunate that I can really spend 2 hrs/day at the gym if I want. I signed up w/ a PT 2X/wk and am going to do at least an hour of cardio 5x/wk.
It seems extreme maybe but I really want to give this my all instead of sitting around assuming there's no point because I tried "a lil" and nothing happened. I"m sure at some point I can go into maintenance phase and taper down my exercise so I can have a life too, but for now I want to be very focused.
I was exercising moderately for 3-4 days a week but got sick and didn't exercise for 2 weeks.
But I'm going to really up the exercise level. I literally decided to put everything else off for the next year and just focus on getting in the best shape possible. My kids are in school now so I'm fortunate that I can really spend 2 hrs/day at the gym if I want. I signed up w/ a PT 2X/wk and am going to do at least an hour of cardio 5x/wk.
It seems extreme maybe but I really want to give this my all instead of sitting around assuming there's no point because I tried "a lil" and nothing happened. I"m sure at some point I can go into maintenance phase and taper down my exercise so I can have a life too, but for now I want to be very focused.
I think a question is what are your S days like as well... Also what are you eating for your three meals.
Technically I could NO S and have an egg mc muffin, 2 taco bell Gordita's and a BIG Mac and fries for dinner.... LOL! I don't think it's a bad thing to look at what your eating and at least try to be sensible about it. (NOt that you can't have frys once in awhile but still)
I heard some really great advice the other day, and this works for s days alike. Get small everything. A small hamburger, a small fry, a small milk shake etc.
Technically I could NO S and have an egg mc muffin, 2 taco bell Gordita's and a BIG Mac and fries for dinner.... LOL! I don't think it's a bad thing to look at what your eating and at least try to be sensible about it. (NOt that you can't have frys once in awhile but still)
I heard some really great advice the other day, and this works for s days alike. Get small everything. A small hamburger, a small fry, a small milk shake etc.
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resting52
- Posts: 445
- Joined: Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:59 pm
- Location: Between the mountains and the beach
Why would you give up?
Where would you go?
When you speak about how easily 60 pounds hopped onto your frame, being up 2 pounds in a month seems insignificant. Also, you said you missed exercise for 2 weeks of the month.
Of course we all would like to lose 15 pounds in one day like your grieving friend, or would we. Chances are like 100% that we would gain it all back and more. Right?
What I see that you have gained is the freedom to say: "I do feel much better about my crazy food issues and don't obsess about food like I usually do so that is amazing."
What a gift!! How many time since you have been dieting (since 10 y.o.) have you eaten pretty much any thing you wanted within those few restrictions and not had a HUGE gain? Maybe, just maybe, we don't feel like we deserve to have such a simple way to lose. We think we need to DO MORE!!!! And NoS is all about doing less. Less obsessing, counting, measuring, grieving, weighing.
I vote for you to hang in there and enjoy the ride. I've always enjoyed reading your insightful posts.
Resting
Where would you go?
When you speak about how easily 60 pounds hopped onto your frame, being up 2 pounds in a month seems insignificant. Also, you said you missed exercise for 2 weeks of the month.
Of course we all would like to lose 15 pounds in one day like your grieving friend, or would we. Chances are like 100% that we would gain it all back and more. Right?
What I see that you have gained is the freedom to say: "I do feel much better about my crazy food issues and don't obsess about food like I usually do so that is amazing."
What a gift!! How many time since you have been dieting (since 10 y.o.) have you eaten pretty much any thing you wanted within those few restrictions and not had a HUGE gain? Maybe, just maybe, we don't feel like we deserve to have such a simple way to lose. We think we need to DO MORE!!!! And NoS is all about doing less. Less obsessing, counting, measuring, grieving, weighing.
I vote for you to hang in there and enjoy the ride. I've always enjoyed reading your insightful posts.
Resting
Hi! As everyone on here thinks...don't give up. You're frustrated. I'm relatively new here, but I've come to the conclusion that every diet that makes me think MORE about food is in the long run feeding my food addiction. Put God first, not food! The no s fits into my new diet guidelines because it takes your focus off of food. If you're thinking about food less than you used to, than you are getting it. Once you are truely doing the nos and the habitcal, if you're still not loosing, use smaller plates and try hard on s days. Keep it up, after about only 1 week of doing this, my tum feels thinner already!
And... I think that your friend just needs something good in her life... give her time and maybe a hint that it isn't helping you.
And... I think that your friend just needs something good in her life... give her time and maybe a hint that it isn't helping you.
