S-Day Lessons

NoelFigart · Post by **NoelFigart** » Sun Oct 04, 2009 5:39 pm

Reinhard talks about habit from N-Days spilling over to S-days. Honestly? My basic initial response internally was, "Yeah, yeah, sugar. You're a young male who did not spend his youth dieting, went on ONE diet, lost the weight and you're all good. You didn't screw up your metabolism, or your eating patterns, so you don't KNOW what it's like otherwise. Of COURSE you think that!"

I really did start No-S as a "giving up". Not dieting any more, but don't want to give myself permission to eat all the time, because if I do, I will. I can go through a loaf of bread in an afternoon if I'm in the mood. I figured if I could at least contain it so that it only happened on weekends, it'd be better than not, and wouldn't feel as "diety" to me.

Well, it's an S-day. Have I had a snack of a slice of bread? Yep, and it tasted great. Did I think about another? Well, I did. I chose not to. I do genuinely treat S days as completely off the hook and don't permit myself to feel guilty about any food choice a make on an S-day and yet I decided I really didn't want that next slice of bread.

Why?

I've noticed on N-days I get this intense rush of pleasure from eating a meal when I'm hungry. Hey, if I hadn't eaten in six hours (the span between lunch and dinner for me), I'm physically, no-kidding legitimately hungry. The most pedestrian of meals tastes and feels WONDERFUL.

Out of sheer hedonism, I want to be hungry for dinner. Eating when not physically hungry doesn't feel as good so I don't want to do it.

It's interesting to me the subtle ways that the N-day/S-day structure is working in my own case. I eat less even on S days than I would without the structure in place, and I really do allow myself to be off the hook on S-days.

Kathleen · Post by **Kathleen** » Sun Oct 04, 2009 11:59 pm

This forum has attracted a lot of middle aged women who have been dieting since they were teenagers and messed up their metabolisms. I'm one of them!
Kathleen

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 4:10 am

Kathleen wrote:This forum has attracted a lot of middle aged women who have been dieting since they were teenagers and messed up their metabolisms. I'm one of them!
Kathleen

I'm not! I dieted maybe once every decade, but that was about it.

The thing that astounds me is that for those who have dieted since they were teenagers, how many have realized that they weren't overweight then. They just thought they were overweight.

aoc · Post by **aoc** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 5:43 am

I don't know how to copy a portion of what someone else wrote in their post (i.e. Kathleen wrote: ...) but wosnes, you hit it on the nose. I would give anything to be the size I was in high school, when I thought I was huge. Now, nearly twenty-five years later, I really am as huge as I thought I was back then. Oh well

NoelFigart · Post by **NoelFigart** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 8:48 am

wosnes wrote:The thing that astounds me is that for those who have dieted since they were teenagers, how many have realized that they weren't overweight then. They just thought they were overweight.

I was called fat, though that was in a ballet class. And for ballet, I was heavy. I got kicked out because I couldn't keep my weight below 115. (I'm 5'2").

By any reasonable health or even attractiveness standard, I wasn't fat at all, simply not slender. I just had an 18 year old figure by the time I was 13.

It was quite an eye opener in later high school years when I started martial arts and my sensei explained to my father that my fighting weight wasn't exactly sylph-like and that he needed to hush up and let me make the choice between vanity and winning tournaments.

Kathleen · Post by **Kathleen** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 2:11 pm

wosnes,
I have wondered what is the defining characteristic of those who stay on this diet. Blueskighs, who was a regular poster last year, told me "Desperation!" You can count on the weight loss not being very fast, and so many diets are promoted for the speed of weight loss. I think it is due to people trying lots of diets and then realizing they are like false gold. Maybe not. I'm just speculating!
Kathleen

TunaFishKid · Post by **TunaFishKid** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 2:52 pm

Kathleen, I agree completely! I am another of the "middle-aged women who have been dieting since they were teenagers" and am making this work simply because I've tried and failed at everything else. Yes, it's slow, but I'm not really on a diet so it doesn't matter how slow it is. I've lot anywhere from 5 to 40 pounds at a time in the past and those pounds always came back and brought a few friends with them. This time I know I won't go off my diet and end up fatter because I'm not "on a diet."

(My first diet was in 1971 when I was fourteen years old, 5'7" tall, and thought I was fat at 121 pounds! I've been dieting and gaining ever since.)

mimi · Post by **mimi** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 2:54 pm

Kathleen wrote:wosnes,
I have wondered what is the defining characteristic of those who stay on this diet. Blueskighs, who was a regular poster last year, told me "Desperation!" You can count on the weight loss not being very fast, and so many diets are promoted for the speed of weight loss. I think it is due to people trying lots of diets and then realizing they are like false gold. Maybe not. I'm just speculating!
Kathleen

For me, there are defining characteristics - more than just one!
1. I feel *normal* around food and eating situations.
2. I don't have to tell anyone that I'm dieting.
3. I don't have to eat *special* foods.
4. My sole metric at mealtime is my plate - no measuring cups, spoons, food diaries, point systems, or calorie books necessary.
5. I have a peaceful relationship with food for the first time in my life, and the *diety* chattering in my head has been silenced.
6. I'm losing, on average, 2 pounds a month...10 total to-date (maybe more, that includes a rather large cast!

)

Mimi

Dandelion · Post by **Dandelion** » Mon Oct 05, 2009 9:22 pm

I'm another of those - I started at 16 when I was a 'fat' cheerleader (5'5" 127 pounds).

I'm not happy with my 'S' Days so far. Not because of what I eat, but of how I feel. I do believe as I do this longer, they will become more like the N days and I won't feel so lousy when the weekend is over. I just hope it doesn't take long

Mounted Ranger! · Post by **Mounted Ranger!** » Tue Oct 06, 2009 2:52 am

Dandelion wrote:I'm another of those - I started at 16 when I was a 'fat' cheerleader (5'5" 127 pounds).

I'm not happy with my 'S' Days so far. Not because of what I eat, but of how I feel. I do believe as I do this longer, they will become more like the N days and I won't feel so lousy when the weekend is over. I just hope it doesn't take long

I really, really, want to encourage you on that, Dandelion. When I first started I'd eat sweets and seconds at every meal, accept everything offered, looked for opportunities to indulge. That really only lasted awhile and tapered off on its own.

Stick with it and I think you'll find the same is true for you. you just have to be patient!

Dandelion · Post by **Dandelion** » Tue Oct 06, 2009 3:13 am

Thanks for the encouragement. I find I am actually eating things I don't even want right now. It's strange, because during the week I don't touch anything outside meals. As someone else said 'it's not an option'. But S&S ..yikes!

I'll be so glad when that is over.

wosnes · Post by **wosnes** » Tue Oct 06, 2009 12:28 pm

mimi wrote:
Kathleen wrote:wosnes,
I have wondered what is the defining characteristic of those who stay on this diet. Blueskighs, who was a regular poster last year, told me "Desperation!" You can count on the weight loss not being very fast, and so many diets are promoted for the speed of weight loss. I think it is due to people trying lots of diets and then realizing they are like false gold. Maybe not. I'm just speculating!
Kathleen
For me, there are defining characteristics - more than just one!
1. I feel *normal* around food and eating situations.
2. I don't have to tell anyone that I'm dieting.
3. I don't have to eat *special* foods.
4. My sole metric at mealtime is my plate - no measuring cups, spoons, food diaries, point systems, or calorie books necessary.
5. I have a peaceful relationship with food for the first time in my life, and the *diety* chattering in my head has been silenced.
6. I'm losing, on average, 2 pounds a month...10 total to-date (maybe more, that includes a rather large cast! )

Mimi

I think Mimi covered this very well.

The appeal and attraction of this for me was ease, simplicity and common sense. I've never believed that there are certain foods or groups of foods (aside from "fake" foods) that should be avoided or eliminated, or certain ways they should be consumed and so on and so forth.

guadopt1997 · Post by **guadopt1997** » Tue Oct 06, 2009 12:28 pm

Dandelion wrote:I find I am actually eating things I don't even want right now. It's strange, because during the week I don't touch anything outside meals. As someone else said 'it's not an option'. But S&S ..yikes!

That is exactly what's happening with me! I'm still having trouble with my S days and I started back in late January. This past weekend was the first time in a long time that I didn't overindulge, but it was because I restricted two categories of food: starches and sweets. Mostly because I'd felt so awful physically and emotionally the weekend before as a result of how much I ate. But this past weekend's strategy is not sustainable and it's not really no-S. So I guess I just have to figure it out weekend by weekend.

Good luck to you too.

blue · Post by **blue** » Wed Oct 07, 2009 2:01 am

The first time I started restricting was in grade school. My parents were getting a divorce so i decided to skinny like the woman my dad liked. Mom was overweight. Instead i got caught eating paste and taking other kids snacks out of there lunches. That was the beginning of "i'm fat I'll diet" but always seem to gain!!!!! No s for me is not a diet!!!! Of course i want to fit in my clothes again but I want Food Sanity more then anything else!!!!

Grammy G · Post by **Grammy G** » Sun Oct 18, 2009 5:24 pm

It is Sunday..an S day.. and I am not going crazy with my eating! Why?? For the same reason so many of you state...feeling lousy when I do!! How did we get ourselves into the cycle of eating until we are ill??? Everyone who posts anything on these sites seems to be insightful, intelligent, and,motivated!
i was NOT a heavy teen..I was "skinny" by the 1950-60 standards..and all I heard was"you are so skinny, why don't you put on a few pounds??" Most clothes for teens began with size 8..way too big for me! (I remember finding an Easter suit in a size 3.. I was so thrilled..It fit!!) I ate and ate trying to gain..I really don't even know how much I weighed until after I had two kids..no idea how much I gained during pregs. or how much I lost after the first baby. It wasn't important to me! After that second baby, folks began commenting about the "baby weight" I needed to lose. And, like many of you, looking at pics of that time..I looked fine! But, diet I did! And lost and gained even more time and time again. Now..I could easily get on a scale several times a day if I let myself. i want to get back to that person who eats with pleasure. I want Food to be put in its place in my life and not an obsession. I think I am sloowly getting there. I am encouraged to hear other women having the same S day concerns. I always learn something when I take the time to read discussions. Thank you to all of those who take the time to share.

Everyday Systems

S-Day Lessons

S-Day Lessons

a skinny teen's path to fat