"You can always come back for seconds."
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
"You can always come back for seconds."
Don't know if anyone else has this problem, but maybe someone could share their perspective. I seem more and more often, now that I'm really trying with NoS to be at different gatherings (work buffets, pot lucks, leftover sharing, etc.) where the person in charge says something like "I'd just like to remind everyone to go easy on the first plate so there is enough for everyone- you're welcome to come back for seconds...", etc. So my problem is that I want to pile the first plate high and then stay in my chair and not be tempted by seconds, but in this case I feel like a real pig after the opening comment. So I've tried getting 2/3 full plate and going back for my 1/3 plateful, which really feels like seconds though it's only 1 plateful total. Then I wonder is that the point of NoS, to have a plate that doesn't look heaped up and stop with that- like our eyes are supposed to adjust to a "normal" amount and not need a heaped up plate, and the social pressure is supposed to help us to maintain a plate that's reasonable and stop with that? I'm fine not going up for sweets, but I'd like to feel like I have my whole plateful. I have ignored the warning and filled my plate up once, only to have someone in line behind me ask if I really was sure there was enough for everyone to get some whatever, and I was really embarrassed. So if anyone has a comment or advice- what would you do?
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paulawylma
- Posts: 92
- Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2008 1:56 am
- Location: Columbus OH
buffets
Reinhard has a section on this in the book until the Holday section (Thanksgiving through New Years Day). I'm actually impressed that you have this problem this time of year--I mean you must have a lot more friends than I do or must work at a wonderful place that believes in feeding their employees. Um, come to think of it, I used to work at a place like that, so maybe I shouldn't get depressed at my lack of invitations just yet. 
Virutal plating is a great way to take care of situations like this. you could just take your cues from what other people are doing or just partially filling your plate as you mentioned. One question I have, is how hungry are you typically at a buffet? If the buffet is later than your normal meal time or a lot earlier, than maybe preplan on having 4 meals that day instead of 3. then if you get hungry after the buffet is over, you can have your 4th meal without snacking. Or is the buffet is much latter than you would normally eat your 3rd meal, then plan for 4 meals and eat the 3rd meal a couple of hours before the buffet. Most buffets I have been to have been potlucks, if this is the case, then you can take a dish that you personally love and take extra quantities of it, so that you know that there is no shortage of that dish. Then you can fill half of your plate with the dish you brought without guilt and add in small amounts of the other offerings.
Virutal plating is a great way to take care of situations like this. you could just take your cues from what other people are doing or just partially filling your plate as you mentioned. One question I have, is how hungry are you typically at a buffet? If the buffet is later than your normal meal time or a lot earlier, than maybe preplan on having 4 meals that day instead of 3. then if you get hungry after the buffet is over, you can have your 4th meal without snacking. Or is the buffet is much latter than you would normally eat your 3rd meal, then plan for 4 meals and eat the 3rd meal a couple of hours before the buffet. Most buffets I have been to have been potlucks, if this is the case, then you can take a dish that you personally love and take extra quantities of it, so that you know that there is no shortage of that dish. Then you can fill half of your plate with the dish you brought without guilt and add in small amounts of the other offerings.
Paulawylma's hit the nail on the head with options. I particularly like her potluck idea of bringing oodles of something you like that you KNOW won't run out.
On the virtual plating... you can also think of it as an opportunity, rather than just a necessity to deal with the circumstances. Do exactly as you've described - take 2/3 of a plate, with plans to come back for the other 1/3.
Then take advantage of this opportunity to listen to your body. Begin eating mindfully, with attention to each bite (don't expect to keep it up the whole meal, but start that way). Then WAIT before getting the rest of your plate. Ask yourself "do I really want this, or am I eating it just because it's here?" You may find that you don't want another 1/3 of a plate - maybe 1/6th is plenty, or maybe the original helping is enough.
I am trying to eat more mindfully, and one strategy is trying to make myself "stop and listen" about 2/3 of the way through. The buffet situation builds that in for you! And you don't have to do it every time - just when you feel up to it.
DO pick foods that you genuinely want on the first pass, so you won't feel cheated if you don't go back. And be selective - pick the best-looking mac'n'cheese, not some of each kind. Also, if there's simply more varieties than you can eat, remind yourself that "there will be nice food again." If you do buffets a lot, you probably get repeats on the offerings, so you WILL have another chance - if not the exact same thing, something as good.
Good luck!
On the virtual plating... you can also think of it as an opportunity, rather than just a necessity to deal with the circumstances. Do exactly as you've described - take 2/3 of a plate, with plans to come back for the other 1/3.
Then take advantage of this opportunity to listen to your body. Begin eating mindfully, with attention to each bite (don't expect to keep it up the whole meal, but start that way). Then WAIT before getting the rest of your plate. Ask yourself "do I really want this, or am I eating it just because it's here?" You may find that you don't want another 1/3 of a plate - maybe 1/6th is plenty, or maybe the original helping is enough.
I am trying to eat more mindfully, and one strategy is trying to make myself "stop and listen" about 2/3 of the way through. The buffet situation builds that in for you! And you don't have to do it every time - just when you feel up to it.
DO pick foods that you genuinely want on the first pass, so you won't feel cheated if you don't go back. And be selective - pick the best-looking mac'n'cheese, not some of each kind. Also, if there's simply more varieties than you can eat, remind yourself that "there will be nice food again." If you do buffets a lot, you probably get repeats on the offerings, so you WILL have another chance - if not the exact same thing, something as good.
Good luck!
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ThomsonsPier
- Posts: 321
- Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2006 2:18 pm
- Location: Reading, UK
Another suggestion is to ensure that you're last in the queue, as then there is no-one behind you to complain. This is not without its drawbacks, however, as there's not guarantee there'll be anything left.
In my opinion, if the supplied food is supposed to be a meal and there's not enough food for everyone, someone's not doing their job properly.
In my opinion, if the supplied food is supposed to be a meal and there's not enough food for everyone, someone's not doing their job properly.
ThomsonsPier
It's a trick. Get an axe.
It's a trick. Get an axe.