Back After A LONG Time Away.....Not Doing Well
Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2010 2:05 pm
Well, I'm back after months away. Sadly, after a great start, I didn't do so well in the end. I did lost about 20 pounds, and I felt great because it was like I had conquered my food addiction and I wasn't snacking and eating junk all the time. Unfortunately, as so often happens, I started to "slip" and before you know it, I was back to snacking and gorging 24/7 and gained back all the weight and then some. I'm now heavier than I've ever been, save once, and it's really alarming me.
I really do think I have a physical addiction to some foods. Candy (especially chocolate) and sugary sodas are like a drug to me, and if I cut them out I feel miserable and depressed (but eating or drinking one will, within minutes, restore me to feeling well.) The doctor has prescribed me a medicine for my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome which also happens to suppress appetite, so hopefully once I start that I'll be able to go back on No S and stick with it. No S, I am still convinced, is still the best "diet" out there, and the only one I ever plan on using again.
It's not all bad news, though. Oddly enough, I am more self accepting now than ever before. I no longer care so much about my weight, and no longer beat myself up being "bad" or unlovable because I am heavy. I mean, I'm not happy about it, but I've taken up several hobbies and interests that do not revolve around my appearance, and I think it's helped out a lot.
So, here we go again! I'll try and make today a perfect day; I tell myself "you just have to make it ONE day" every day, which makes it seem like less of a chore. Wish me luck!
I really do think I have a physical addiction to some foods. Candy (especially chocolate) and sugary sodas are like a drug to me, and if I cut them out I feel miserable and depressed (but eating or drinking one will, within minutes, restore me to feeling well.) The doctor has prescribed me a medicine for my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome which also happens to suppress appetite, so hopefully once I start that I'll be able to go back on No S and stick with it. No S, I am still convinced, is still the best "diet" out there, and the only one I ever plan on using again.
It's not all bad news, though. Oddly enough, I am more self accepting now than ever before. I no longer care so much about my weight, and no longer beat myself up being "bad" or unlovable because I am heavy. I mean, I'm not happy about it, but I've taken up several hobbies and interests that do not revolve around my appearance, and I think it's helped out a lot.
So, here we go again! I'll try and make today a perfect day; I tell myself "you just have to make it ONE day" every day, which makes it seem like less of a chore. Wish me luck!