Everyday Systems

Hubs and I have an unexpected empty house tonight. We are going out for a burger then home to watch a movie. He wants us get something for dessert to go with wine that was gifted to us this week. It's Friday night and I have had two weeks of Vanilla S with no cheating! Should I allow myself to indulge or stay on the straight and narrow?
What would you all do?

I'd probably indulge, unless I did every week and had pounds creeping on. Sometimes dessert is worth enjoying, and sometimes it is worth skipping.

If I was keeping a chart I'd mark it as a failure, just to remember that I added treats on a day I hadn't planned to.

Honestly, if you'd been at this for several years I don't think the occasional cheat would be a big deal. But the early days are the toughest and the most essential for habit building. So if it were me, I'd skip the desert. Plus then you'll only need one more green week for the 21 day club!

Will you be up late watching the movie so that the desert can wait until midnight? (Which is more likely what I would actually do instead of skipping it altogether) Or could you get a desert that you husband can enjoy tonight, but would keep well for you to enjoy tomorrow?

Alternatively if Friday nights are always tricky, would you prefer to start your days at dinner (or 6 pm, or something other than midnight)? So that Friday night is an S night, but Sunday night is N. I know some people have made this simple mod.

Or, you could choose the wine and skip the dessert. Wine and dessert together doesn't sound good to me.

I decided to....skip dessert!!! I sure appreciate all your ideas and encouragement. Hubs didn't want dessert after all but offered to buy me some, but his not wanting it was a great out for me. I really didn't want to "fail" or even make a concession but I didn't want to spoil his date either. So it's all good and I'm on track. Funny how already my thinking is changing. We went to the grocery store to pick up supplies for our coffee shop and as we were standing in line I started thinking aloud about pie. LOL He suggested I get myself a Hostess fruit pie (which I used to have once in a great while) but at that moment I realized that if I was going to choose dessert especially on an N day, it better be for a really good reason AND really, really worth it. I wasn't about to sell my soul for some dinky Hostess pie - nope, not.going.to.happen!
So there, I've made it through week #2 unscathed. Doing a little happy dance.

Sienna wrote: Plus then you'll only need one more green week for the 21 day club!

Will you be up late watching the movie so that the desert can wait until midnight? (Which is more likely what I would actually do instead of skipping it altogether) Or could you get a desert that you husband can enjoy tonight, but would keep well for you to enjoy tomorrow?

Alternatively if Friday nights are always tricky, would you prefer to start your days at dinner (or 6 pm, or something other than midnight)? So that Friday night is an S night, but Sunday night is N. I know some people have made this simple mod.

What is the 21 day club? Do I get a pin? LOL I'm going for it!

By the way, I like the idea of changing what constitutes my day, but I think I'm going to wait to make any tweaks until I have this thing down really solid. I feel like giving myself any wiggle room right now may end up making me wiggle right off the track.

wosnes wrote:Or, you could choose the wine and skip the dessert. Wine and dessert together doesn't sound good to me.

Ah, but I live in wine country and yet have only recently started tasting / drinking it. I'm enjoying it whenever we can afford it, which is not very often at all. One things I've discovered is that some luscious desserts really are amazing with a good dessert wine. I don't know if wine is considered a sweet, but I'm treating it as such when I do have some on hand.

Starting desserts on Friday is a slippery slope. I have to say so is starting your weekend at midnight, IMHO. It's not the spirit of the law at all to include an extra few hours of eating. Speaking from experience. I'm glad you didn't do it.

Really, it will be too easy to keep finding reasons to make exceptions, so it's better not to do it. Reinhard says it's called "fence around the law." Strict moderation. It will become habit if you make it the habit. And when it's habit, it doesn't hurt!

oolala53 wrote:Starting desserts on Friday is a slippery slope. I have to say so is starting your weekend at midnight, IMHO. It's not the spirit of the law at all to include an extra few hours of eating. Speaking from experience. I'm glad you didn't do it.

Really, it will be too easy to keep finding reasons to make exceptions, so it's better not to do it. Reinhard says it's called "fence around the law." Strict moderation. It will become habit if you make it the habit. And when it's habit, it doesn't hurt!

Thanks! I agree. I also remember reading that part about the fence and sharing it with my dc. It's the same idea that my dh and I have taught our kiddos in regards setting moral boundaries, but I really like how R said it.

ginmarie wrote:

Sienna wrote: Plus then you'll only need one more green week for the 21 day club!

Will you be up late watching the movie so that the desert can wait until midnight? (Which is more likely what I would actually do instead of skipping it altogether) Or could you get a desert that you husband can enjoy tonight, but would keep well for you to enjoy tomorrow?

Alternatively if Friday nights are always tricky, would you prefer to start your days at dinner (or 6 pm, or something other than midnight)? So that Friday night is an S night, but Sunday night is N. I know some people have made this simple mod.

What is the 21 day club? Do I get a pin? LOL I'm going for it!

By the way, I like the idea of changing what constitutes my day, but I think I'm going to wait to make any tweaks until I have this thing down really solid. I feel like giving myself any wiggle room right now may end up making me wiggle right off the track.

The 21 day club is 21 solid days of NoS with no red days. No pin, but you do get to brag in this thread: http://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=173 Just a little goal to shoot for. I believe the number 21 comes from the point Reinhard makes that it takes 3 weeks to build a habit.

As to wine, I personally don't consider it a sweet (or any other alcoholic drink, except those that are sweets because of other things the contain, such as mudslides). But then, I've always had a personal 2 drink max (and it's rarely more than 1) per day/occasion even before NoS. And it's rare that I have more than 1 or 2 occasions in a week. So I just don't worry about it.

Juice however, I consider a sweet. Because I'll restrain myself on wine, but I'll down two 64 oz bottles of juice in an afternoon without even noticing. I would guess that very few others have that severe of a problem with juice. Just further proof of how we are all different!


Congrats on a successful Friday, and Happy Weekend!

Sienna wrote:

ginmarie wrote:

Sienna wrote: Plus then you'll only need one more green week for the 21 day club!

Will you be up late watching the movie so that the desert can wait until midnight? (Which is more likely what I would actually do instead of skipping it altogether) Or could you get a desert that you husband can enjoy tonight, but would keep well for you to enjoy tomorrow?

Alternatively if Friday nights are always tricky, would you prefer to start your days at dinner (or 6 pm, or something other than midnight)? So that Friday night is an S night, but Sunday night is N. I know some people have made this simple mod.

What is the 21 day club? Do I get a pin? LOL I'm going for it!

By the way, I like the idea of changing what constitutes my day, but I think I'm going to wait to make any tweaks until I have this thing down really solid. I feel like giving myself any wiggle room right now may end up making me wiggle right off the track.

The 21 day club is 21 solid days of NoS with no red days. No pin, but you do get to brag in this thread: http://everydaysystems.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=173 Just a little goal to shoot for. I believe the number 21 comes from the point Reinhard makes that it takes 3 weeks to build a habit.

As to wine, I personally don't consider it a sweet (or any other alcoholic drink, except those that are sweets because of other things the contain, such as mudslides). But then, I've always had a personal 2 drink max (and it's rarely more than 1) per day/occasion even before NoS. And it's rare that I have more than 1 or 2 occasions in a week. So I just don't worry about it.

Juice however, I consider a sweet. Because I'll restrain myself on wine, but I'll down two 64 oz bottles of juice in an afternoon without even noticing. I would guess that very few others have that severe of a problem with juice. Just further proof of how we are all different!


Congrats on a successful Friday, and Happy Weekend!

Hurray - 7 more days and I'm in the club!!!
I don't get wine often enough to worry about it either, even when we have it, I only drink one half glass on any given day until it's gone, that's all I want. As for juice, my family has always been pretty much oj only and only for breakfast. We just have never developed a juice habit. You are so right about our differences. What is easy-peasy for one person is harder-n-heck for another.

so..here's what I am seeing as a basic difference between men and women: you were going to eat dessert so that you wouldn't ruin dh's date.. he decided he didn't want dessert anyhow and so you both had a good night..and he offered to get you some if you wanted it..not offer to eat it with you. I don't think men care if we eat with them or drink with them! Women. on the other hand, do care..why? ya got me! Ask him if he would care if he had a dessert and you decided not to have any. i think this is what got me into trouble..thinking I had to be eating popcorn or having a drink whenever we would be watching TV or relaxing. i finally figured out..he doesn't care! He is just as happy having me there with or without food/drink in my hand. PS..I absolutely love a rich red wine with dark chocolate... perfect for a Saturday night treat!