Everyday Systems

I have been doing Nos for three weeks and have been successful at sticking at it. However I dont like S days. I tend to overdo it and then be overwhelmed with guilt. Its a relief to get back to Nos days where Im in perfect control. Does anyone else feel like this?

Oh sure. Even now, I still eat stuff I don't really want. I'm getting better but I'm a long way from where I think I should be.

But it's much easier to shake off the guilt by refocusing on the positives of the plan and it's much MUCH easier to catch myself eating unsatisfying food and stop it.

Keep going!

yup, I am the same way. I usually have a gross Sunday night feeling and look forward to the structure of the week. I have even quit this diet a few times because weekends tend to just make me feel so undone. It is still work for me how to keep things in moderation and not be crazy just because it is Saturday and Sunday.

I think about S days as a chance to enjoy a little extra, but I don't gorge on crappy food. We just don't keep junk in the house.

Also, I believe that guilt has no place at the dinner table.

Before you did No S, were you overdoing it to the degree you do now on S days, on average, at least two days per week?

If you answered yes to that question, then you have absolutely no reason to feel guilty about overdoing it on S days now. You are eating less than you were before No S, and that was the point.

Don't compare your eating habits to diet-book perfection that very, very few people (if any) actually manage to achieve. Only compare your eating habits to other eating habits you've actually managed to stick to for more than a month at a time. Comparing them to anything else just isn't fair or reasonable.

Even if you answered no to that question, that doesn't mean you need to feel guilty, or that there's nothing you can do about overdoing it.

No S isn't a diet where all the changes happen right away, at the start, through conscious effort. I've been in it since August 2010. It wasn't until at least this August, a year later, that I noticed that I wasn't getting really hungry around 4pm (long before dinner, for me). Fasting this Yom Kippur was much, much easier than it was the previous year. Clearly, something was still changing for me, a year after I started the diet. What you're doing on No S now isn't necessarily the same thing you'll be doing a year from now (even assuming you're still on No S then).

If you're less than 3 months into No S, just trust the process. You will probably be eating less in a few months than you are now. Don't try to rush it- that doesn't work. As Wernher von Braun once said about crash programs in the space program: "Crash programs fail because they are based on the theory that, with nine women pregnant, you can get a baby in a month." Rushing things in forming habits doesn't work much better than it does in pregnancy. Habits just Do Not Work That Way.

If you're more than 3 months in, try to figure out exactly how the "overdoing it" times are happening. Then try to think of ways to make that sequence of events less likely to happen (this is where mods come in). But only try to work on a few (three or less) scenarios at one time. If you try to tackle more than that at one time, you're much less likely to succeed.

Who Me? wrote:Also, I believe that guilt has no place at the dinner table.

No, it doesn't. It's about as pleasant a dinner guest as someone who blows bubbles in their milk, farts and burps loudly, and chews noisily with their mouth open.

Nicest of the Damned wrote: Don't compare your eating habits to diet-book perfection that very, very few people (if any) actually manage to achieve. Only compare your eating habits to other eating habits you've actually managed to stick to for more than a month at a time. Comparing them to anything else just isn't fair or reasonable.

This is so important!
We are not striving for perfection but simply for a "good enough". And if you only overdo it on weekends now, this is good enough for now. You'll soon find yourself eating less! Have patience and enjoy your weekends, you really should (:

Oh and by the way: I am struggling with it too! But I sometimes get those moments when I feel differently and I don't want to eat anymore.. Little signs that show that I am making progress, I am sure you'll notice them on yourself too (soon!)

Thankyou so much! You're right I am eating less than I was a month ago. Its just that I've been a yo yo dieter for decades and its taking me some time to realise that being perfect just doesn't work. I am happy with the way my weekdays are going. I just have to learn to enjoy weekends. Again thankyou for your encouragement

bjalda wrote:Oh and by the way: I am struggling with it too! But I sometimes get those moments when I feel different, when I don't want to eat anymore.. Little signs that show that I am making progress, I am sure you'll notice them on yourself too (soon!)

I never really noticed them until after they happened. I remember thinking once, "Hey, I don't think I had any sweets or snacks yesterday, and it was an S day." I really only recognized those changes in retrospect. It's not always obvious when it's happening.

I never got the feeling good to get back in control on N days, at least not yet. What I did get was resenting not being able to eat what I wanted (I would get quite angry about this), and counting the days till my next S day. That did get better, but it took a while.

One of the great things about No S, though, is that there can be no failure that doesn't involve putting food in your mouth. How you're feeling is a lot less important than what you do. You'll still lose weight if you do No S, but don't always like it. I don't think Reinhard will take it personally if you don't always enjoy doing No S, either.

You should also know that three weeks in is one of the hardest times in this diet for a lot of people. You've probably lost your initial enthusiasm, but you don't have firm habits made yet (researchers on human behavior say it takes at least a month to establish a new habit). This does vary, and the other stuff that's going on in your life does make a huge difference, but there are reasons to be at least cautiously optimistic that things will get easier and not harder from here.

Nicest of the Damned wrote:
If you're less than 3 months into No S, just trust the process.

Nicest of the Damned, you said a whole pile of wise things, but this is what stands out to me. I've attempted NoS a number of times in the past 3 years, but this time around is completely different. There are a number of factors that I believe has led to more success, but this statement is one of the main ones. In the past, I think I spent FAR too much time trying to think through my days....trying to analyze what I was experiencing & why I was struggling. This time I am trying NOT to think about this very much. I've spent a lifetime trying to figure this whole eating thing out...it's time to just "trust the process" and follow the plan. Period. I'm finding that so much of this battle is in my mind & as long as I avoid pondering the whole process, I'm far more successful.

I think I need to put "Trust the Process" in big letters on my fridge...

janie

I agree determined. The beauty of this plan is the simplicity of it. You do not even have to plan ahead nor do you have to keep a journal or weigh or measure or anything. I did not track anything on my long vacation in June, but I pretty much stuck to the 3 meals a day and rarely had sweets, seconds or snacks.