I'm reading a fascinating book..
The Willpower Instinct
"How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It"
by Kelly McGonigal PhD
The author teaches a course about this subject at Stanford. It's a 10 week program and is among the most popular in the history of Stanford's Continuing Studies program. The book has 10 chapters, each one devoted to a week of her course. Each chapter focuses on one or two subjects and has one of two "willpower experiments" to try for the week.
I'm tackling one chapter at a time. This week I read "Willpower 101". I'm happy to confirm what I always suspected, I have 1 brain but 2 minds. I'm going to strengthen the mind that has self control and diminish the impulsive one.
For anyone struggling to strengthen the No S rules, I highly recommend this book. The author writes in a very entertaining style, she compared strawberry cheesecake to a saber toothed tiger!
Even though I'm only on chapter one, I'm already getting useful advice. The first step in increasing will power is to become self aware. When your will power is tested, think "Will I choose the easy way or the hard way?". Also, when faced with a challenging situation,slowing down your breathing to about 15 seconds per breath helps strengthen will power.
Here are some of the upcoming chapters..
-Too Tired to Resist; Why Self-Control is Like a Muscle
-License to Sin; Why Being Good Gives us Permission to Be Bad. (I may have to read this chapter a couple of times)
-The Brains' Big Lie;Why We Mistake Wanting For Happiness
and finally..
-Your Body Was Born to Resist Cheesecake
The No S Diet and The Willpower Instinct are the only 2 books I have on my nightstand.
I've read Reinhard's book so many times, the pages are getting frayed. When I finish The Willpower Instinct, I'll follow up with a book report.
_________________
Book Review!
Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating
Book Review!
Last edited by LoriLifts on Sat Jan 28, 2012 4:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables.
Hi Adrian, I have a book obsession too!
The author suggests that the reader focus on one specific willpower challenge at a time. Read the whole book, do the experiments, then begin again with a new area of focus.
I'm starting with No S. My next area of focus will be controlling impulsive spending, that may be as tough as not eating sweets on N days!
The author suggests that the reader focus on one specific willpower challenge at a time. Read the whole book, do the experiments, then begin again with a new area of focus.
I'm starting with No S. My next area of focus will be controlling impulsive spending, that may be as tough as not eating sweets on N days!
Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables.
This may be why I keep failing at 21 day Vanilla S challenges..
The Problem with Progress: Why Succeeding at Your Goals Can Sabotage Your Willpower
Are to-do lists perilous to your goals?
Published on December 11, 2011 by Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D. in The Science of Willpower
Most of us believe that making progress on our goals spurs us on to greater success. But some of the most fascinating research on goal achievement points to a dark side of progress. Psychologists have found that we are all too quick to use progress as an excuse for taking it easy.
For example, Ayelet Fishbach, a professor at the University of Chicago Graduate School of Business, and Ravi Dhar, a professor at the Yale School of Management, have shown that making progress on a goal motivates people to engage in goal-sabotaging behavior. That's right, the very act of recognizing their own success sets them up for failure. In one study, they reminded successful dieters of how much progress they had made toward their ideal weight. They then offered the dieters a thank-you gift of either an apple or a chocolate bar. 85% of the self-congratulating dieters chose the chocolate bar over the apple, compared to only 58% of dieters who were not reminded of their progress
A second study found the same effect for academic goals: students made to feel good about the amount of time they had spent studying for an exam were more likely to spend the evening playing beer pong with friends.
Progress can cause us to abandon the goal we've worked so hard on because it shifts the power of balance between two competing goals. By definition, a willpower challenge involves a conflict. Part of you is thinking about your long-term interests (e.g., weight loss); the other part wants immediate gratification (chocolate!). In the moment of temptation, you need your higher self to argue louder than the voice of self-indulgence.
However, self-control success has an unintended consequence: it temporarily satisfies-and therefore silences-the higher self. When you make progress toward your long-term goal, your brain—with its mental checklist of many goals—turns off the mental processes that were driving you to pursue your long-term goal. It will then turn to its attention to the goal that has not yet been satisfied—the voice of self-indulgence. Psychologists call this goal liberation. The goal you've been suppressing with your self-control is going to become stronger, and any temptation will become more tempting.
In practical terms, this means that one step forward gives you permission to take two steps back. Setting up your automatic retirement investment may satisfy the part of you that wants to save, liberating the part of you that wants to shop. Getting your files organized may satisfy the part of you that wants to work, liberating the part of you that wants to watch the game on TV. You were listening to the angel on your shoulder, but now the devil seems so much more compelling.
Even the most trusty tool of goal pursuit, the To Do list, can backfire. Have you ever made a list of everything you need to do on a project, and then felt so good about yourself that you considered your work on that project done for the day? If so, you're not alone. Because it's such a relief to make that list, we mistake the satisfaction of identifying what needs to be done with actual effort toward our goals. (Or, as one of my students said, he loves productivity seminars because they make him feel so productive—never mind that nothing has been produced yet.)
Although it runs counter to everything we believe about achieving our goals, focusing on progress can hold us back from success. That's not to say that progress itself is a problem. The problem with progress is how it makes us feel—and even then, it's only a problem if we listen to the feeling instead of sticking to our goals. Progress can be motivating, and even inspire future self-control, but only if you view your actions as evidence that that you are committed to your goal. You need to look at what you have done and conclude that you must really care about your goal. So much so, that you want to do even more to reach to it. This perspective is easy to adopt; it's just not our usual mindset. More typically, we look for the reason to stop.
These two mindsets have very different consequences. When people who have taken a positive step toward meeting a goal-for example, exercising, studying, or saving money-are asked "How much progress do you feel you have made on your goal?", they are more likely to then do something that conflicts with that goal, like skip the gym tomorrow, hang out with friends instead of studying, or buy something expensive. In contrast, people who are asked "How committed do you feel to your goal?" are not tempted by the conflicting behavior. A simple shift in focus led to a very different interpretation of their own actions—"I did that because I wanted to," not "I did that, great, now I can do what I really want!"
How do you focus on commitment instead of progress? A study by researchers at Hong Kong University of Science and the University of Chicago provides one strategy. When they asked students to remember a time they turned down a temptation, 70% took the next opportunity to indulge. They rewarded their good behavior with a little indulgence. But when the researchers also asked the participants to remember why they had resisted, 69% resisted temptation.
Remembering the why works because it changes how you feel about the reward of self-indulgence. That so-called treat will start to look more like the threat to your goals that it is, and giving in won't look so good. Remembering the "why" will also help you recognize and act on other opportunities to accomplish your goal.
This blog post is an adapted excerpt from Chapter 4, "License to Sin: Why Being Good Gives Us Permission to Be Bad," of The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It by Kelly McGonigal, PhD (Penguin/Avery 2011).
_________________
The Problem with Progress: Why Succeeding at Your Goals Can Sabotage Your Willpower
Are to-do lists perilous to your goals?
Published on December 11, 2011 by Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D. in The Science of Willpower
Most of us believe that making progress on our goals spurs us on to greater success. But some of the most fascinating research on goal achievement points to a dark side of progress. Psychologists have found that we are all too quick to use progress as an excuse for taking it easy.
For example, Ayelet Fishbach, a professor at the University of Chicago Graduate School of Business, and Ravi Dhar, a professor at the Yale School of Management, have shown that making progress on a goal motivates people to engage in goal-sabotaging behavior. That's right, the very act of recognizing their own success sets them up for failure. In one study, they reminded successful dieters of how much progress they had made toward their ideal weight. They then offered the dieters a thank-you gift of either an apple or a chocolate bar. 85% of the self-congratulating dieters chose the chocolate bar over the apple, compared to only 58% of dieters who were not reminded of their progress
A second study found the same effect for academic goals: students made to feel good about the amount of time they had spent studying for an exam were more likely to spend the evening playing beer pong with friends.
Progress can cause us to abandon the goal we've worked so hard on because it shifts the power of balance between two competing goals. By definition, a willpower challenge involves a conflict. Part of you is thinking about your long-term interests (e.g., weight loss); the other part wants immediate gratification (chocolate!). In the moment of temptation, you need your higher self to argue louder than the voice of self-indulgence.
However, self-control success has an unintended consequence: it temporarily satisfies-and therefore silences-the higher self. When you make progress toward your long-term goal, your brain—with its mental checklist of many goals—turns off the mental processes that were driving you to pursue your long-term goal. It will then turn to its attention to the goal that has not yet been satisfied—the voice of self-indulgence. Psychologists call this goal liberation. The goal you've been suppressing with your self-control is going to become stronger, and any temptation will become more tempting.
In practical terms, this means that one step forward gives you permission to take two steps back. Setting up your automatic retirement investment may satisfy the part of you that wants to save, liberating the part of you that wants to shop. Getting your files organized may satisfy the part of you that wants to work, liberating the part of you that wants to watch the game on TV. You were listening to the angel on your shoulder, but now the devil seems so much more compelling.
Even the most trusty tool of goal pursuit, the To Do list, can backfire. Have you ever made a list of everything you need to do on a project, and then felt so good about yourself that you considered your work on that project done for the day? If so, you're not alone. Because it's such a relief to make that list, we mistake the satisfaction of identifying what needs to be done with actual effort toward our goals. (Or, as one of my students said, he loves productivity seminars because they make him feel so productive—never mind that nothing has been produced yet.)
Although it runs counter to everything we believe about achieving our goals, focusing on progress can hold us back from success. That's not to say that progress itself is a problem. The problem with progress is how it makes us feel—and even then, it's only a problem if we listen to the feeling instead of sticking to our goals. Progress can be motivating, and even inspire future self-control, but only if you view your actions as evidence that that you are committed to your goal. You need to look at what you have done and conclude that you must really care about your goal. So much so, that you want to do even more to reach to it. This perspective is easy to adopt; it's just not our usual mindset. More typically, we look for the reason to stop.
These two mindsets have very different consequences. When people who have taken a positive step toward meeting a goal-for example, exercising, studying, or saving money-are asked "How much progress do you feel you have made on your goal?", they are more likely to then do something that conflicts with that goal, like skip the gym tomorrow, hang out with friends instead of studying, or buy something expensive. In contrast, people who are asked "How committed do you feel to your goal?" are not tempted by the conflicting behavior. A simple shift in focus led to a very different interpretation of their own actions—"I did that because I wanted to," not "I did that, great, now I can do what I really want!"
How do you focus on commitment instead of progress? A study by researchers at Hong Kong University of Science and the University of Chicago provides one strategy. When they asked students to remember a time they turned down a temptation, 70% took the next opportunity to indulge. They rewarded their good behavior with a little indulgence. But when the researchers also asked the participants to remember why they had resisted, 69% resisted temptation.
Remembering the why works because it changes how you feel about the reward of self-indulgence. That so-called treat will start to look more like the threat to your goals that it is, and giving in won't look so good. Remembering the "why" will also help you recognize and act on other opportunities to accomplish your goal.
This blog post is an adapted excerpt from Chapter 4, "License to Sin: Why Being Good Gives Us Permission to Be Bad," of The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It by Kelly McGonigal, PhD (Penguin/Avery 2011).
_________________
Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables.
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Too solid flesh
- Posts: 639
- Joined: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:22 pm
- Location: England
I know I've said before that Judith Beck's techniques helped me stick with No S many times. The FIRST thing she tells would-be dieters to do is to list the advantages of losing weight. I amended it to say the advantages of eating sanely. I have about 40 of them. She recommnends making a portable list and reading it several times a day for the first weeks and then twice a day during and after (she's a diet traditionalist) reaching goal. I have my list on my desktop and on a notecard in my purse. I'm realizing I need to start applying some of these techniques to other tasks I want to accomplish.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
-
BrightAngel
- Posts: 2093
- Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 4:22 pm
- Location: Central California
- Contact:
I found it on audible (which makes it much more likely that I'll be able to "read" it).
http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?as ... 934&sr=1-1
Just as soon as I finish Dune (only 18 hours left!).
http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?as ... 067&sr=1-1
Reinhard
http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?as ... 934&sr=1-1
Just as soon as I finish Dune (only 18 hours left!).
http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?as ... 067&sr=1-1
Reinhard
Let's keep our priorities straight.
What do you do while you listen to an audio book? Do you listen while you walk to work?
What do you do while you listen to an audio book? Do you listen while you walk to work?
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
I listen while I walk to work, do the dishes, pick up after the kids -- pretty much whenever I'm doing some non-social physical task. I'd say I get in at least an hour of listening every day this way, sometimes much more, without having to compete for time with other activities. Some of my listening is to language learning programs (pimsleur, etc), but most is to audiobooks proper.
Reinhard
Reinhard
I had tried listening when I drove years ago but found I would need to pay attention to the road and would lose the story. Recently, I listened to non-fiction while on the road and it has worked out well. In fact, since I live alone, I sometimes listen to podcasts or have youtube on of people I like, like Reinhard or Barbara Sher or spiritual teachers. I'll say I'm having dinner with ___________ tonight.
Not to hijack the thread. The willpower book does sound good. Hope my library gets it soon.
Not to hijack the thread. The willpower book does sound good. Hope my library gets it soon.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23
There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)
I'm still reading "The Willpower Instinct".
It's messing with my head!
Last night I read the chapter called "The Brain's Big Lie". The author talks about dopamine, which is a "feel good" neurotransmitter.
When your brain recognizes an opportunity for a reward (like pie after dinner), it releases dopamine. The dopamine rush makes us feel good.
But here's the kicker...
We equate the feel good rush for happiness.
But it's not happiness, it's more like arousal. Here's an excerpt from the book on the subject of "false rewards"...
"Just think of your biggest "I won't" challenge. Chances are this is something you believe makes you happy-or would make you happy,if you could just get enough of it. But a careful analysis of the experience and it's consequences often revels the opposite. At best, giving in takes away the anxiety that the promise of reward produces to make you want it more. But ultimately, you're left frustrated, unsatisfied, disappointed, ashamed, tired, sick, or simply no happier than when you started."
This is the experience I have when I have a red N day. I won't eat sweets until an S day. I won't do it. But then... around 2pm I decide that "I'm going to stop at the bakery and get a dessert for dinner. The idea makes me happy. Driving to the bakery and picking out my dessert makes me happy.
About halfway through the dessert, my feelings begin to change. I feel regret and disappointment. I have some anxiety, maybe I can't get back on track. I usually finish with anger from my lack of self control.
The next chapter is called "What the Hell". I have a feeling this will be an eye opener too...
It's messing with my head!
Last night I read the chapter called "The Brain's Big Lie". The author talks about dopamine, which is a "feel good" neurotransmitter.
When your brain recognizes an opportunity for a reward (like pie after dinner), it releases dopamine. The dopamine rush makes us feel good.
But here's the kicker...
We equate the feel good rush for happiness.
But it's not happiness, it's more like arousal. Here's an excerpt from the book on the subject of "false rewards"...
"Just think of your biggest "I won't" challenge. Chances are this is something you believe makes you happy-or would make you happy,if you could just get enough of it. But a careful analysis of the experience and it's consequences often revels the opposite. At best, giving in takes away the anxiety that the promise of reward produces to make you want it more. But ultimately, you're left frustrated, unsatisfied, disappointed, ashamed, tired, sick, or simply no happier than when you started."
This is the experience I have when I have a red N day. I won't eat sweets until an S day. I won't do it. But then... around 2pm I decide that "I'm going to stop at the bakery and get a dessert for dinner. The idea makes me happy. Driving to the bakery and picking out my dessert makes me happy.
About halfway through the dessert, my feelings begin to change. I feel regret and disappointment. I have some anxiety, maybe I can't get back on track. I usually finish with anger from my lack of self control.
The next chapter is called "What the Hell". I have a feeling this will be an eye opener too...
Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables.
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BeingGreen
- Posts: 184
- Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 4:50 am
- Location: Portland OR
Just started listening to this yesterday...
(sorry, I slipped in "The Case for Books," after Dune first)
The windup is a little long, but I like her angle, and the reader is good, so I'm optimistic. I'll post my thoughts here when I'm done.
Thanks again for the recommendation!
Reinhard
(sorry, I slipped in "The Case for Books," after Dune first)
The windup is a little long, but I like her angle, and the reader is good, so I'm optimistic. I'll post my thoughts here when I'm done.
Thanks again for the recommendation!
Reinhard