Everyday Systems

This morning at the deli, I saw a new wine cheddar cheese that looked good.

I asked the deli lady about it and she gave me two slices to try.

I ate them, loved them and ordered 2 lb.

5-10 minutes later I realized this was a snack. I wasn't upset about it because we are taking ur youngest son to dinner tonight o to celebrate his birthday and I had already planned to make today an S(special) day.

However, the following questions came to mind:

If I had used my monthly quota (2) of Special days:

1) Should I have given myself a red light?

2) If I had forgotten about it, would it make any difference giving myself a green where I deserved a red?

Jethro wrote:1) Should I have given myself a red light?

Technically, yes.

Jethro wrote:2) If I had forgotten about it, would it make any difference giving myself a green where I deserved a red?

To your weight? Probably not. To your habit? Perhaps. Giving yourself a mental pass does not reinforce the strictness that some people need. I realize that some people can contain supermarket nibbles to products that they only are truly considering buying and therefore run no risk of mindlessly snacking their way through the store during future shopping trips.

But there are others who will nibble just because it's offered and could easily end up eating the equivalent of another meal just to pick up a gallon of milk.

It's a personal call. You know yourself best. Be searingly honest. The only person you "game" is yourself if you are not.

I'm on the other side. I wouldn't count it as a snack/red light, but rather as the cost of doing business--finding out if my family would enjoy this new (and presumably somewhat costly) cheese. Limited in scope, little chance of happening mindlessly. Not knowing how big the slices were (slivers? slabs? something in between?), I might suggest that you limit the sample to the amount you really need to discern whether you like the item or not. Two slivers seems about right. Two slabs could be a mini-meal.

Note: I would count as red trying all (or even just a few of) the samples at Costco merely because they are there at the end of every aisle. I used to do that pre-NoS ("Free Food!") even when I had no intention of really buying the product. But now I don't try anything unless I have hopeful but serious intent of buying it. And I don't mark it as a red day. Just like I don't count the tasting I must do when cooking a dish. I just make sure it is the least amount of tasting necessary to do my job.

HTH,

I'd say that the monthly quota (however it works) has nothing to do with it. NoS is about choosing in advance what to do with your day. Either you chose it would be a green/red day, or you chose that it would be a yellow day.

- If you chose in advance that it would be a yellow day, then you don't have to mark it as red, since you can't have a green on that day.
- If you chose in advance that it would be a green/red day, well, I would say red.

If you have to wonder, I'd say that the rules you're using are ambiguous, So take a moment to answer this : Will you allow yourself to taste products before you buy them, even on non S-days? In that case, what is your hard limit on tasting? In the end, the goal is not to ask these questions. Now if you're like me and taste anything that's on a pick just because it's free, better forbid yourself. Examine yourself, and try to see what your motivaitons were when you tasted that.

You're a grown-up, the decision is yours.

Hi Jethro,

for me the clarity of the program is one of the reasons I believe I'm able to do it.

As for what happened: I'd mark it as a grey day or even as a green day as the real success is that you noticed a possibly derailing behaviour that over the course of a year can amount to quite a bit of extra food.

For the future (as another thing I love about this program is that it is all about what you can do next to make a difference): I'd schedule any special shopping for S days. That way you don't have to limit yourself and the pleasure of shopping food comes completely guilt free.

That's just what works for me though. Keep me posted if you find other solutions.

The reason why I'd be loathe to mark this as a red day is because I have been sucked into the all-or-nothing diet mentality, and to give myself a negative score for taking a sample of cheese would lead to and all-you-can-eat buffet of self-flagellation. This is exactly what I am trying to counteract by No S-ing, so I'd rescore the day as a Surprise yellow, and try to strategize for future shopping trips. Costco on a Saturday? I've been to weddings where the food isn't as good or plentiful as the samples! Loooove it!!!! It's definitely Special to me! (And to their profit margin - for a woman living alone, I go cray-cray when I'm there!)

On thing I've found useful is to really look at the behaviour of the chefs on the Food Network - you will often see the chef either take the teeniest of bites (as does Giada de Laurentiis) or they may even just taste the amount of sauce that coats the back of the spoon so they only get the minimal amount needed to taste the item.

So I would have had the minimal amount of cheese required to ascertain that I liked it, bought some, and enjoyed a nice portion as part of my next meal. One of my goals is to take the shame out of enjoying food that isn't "dietetic", so giving myself a proper portion of cheese would seriously be a quantum leap.

I agree with Rachelocity.

I see this conversation as an example of the all or nothing thinking that I used to employ when trying to get my eating habits under control by whatever method I was trying that day. If I ate anything bad or out of sync with whatever rules I was using then I tended to give up for the day. WTH effect!

With No S I have been able to examine what happened with more objectivity. I would not have taken a red for a taste to see if I wanted to buy something. That is called normal behavior, and isn't that what we are striving for?

I ate a peach for a snack and marked it red because of developing the no snacking habit, especially since I could have saved it for the next meal. But in buying that much of a new type of cheese, I definitely would have sampled it (but only one slice) and marked it green. Like r.jean said, that's just normal behavior.