Should I Be Depressed, Have Other Negative Emotions on No S?

[Mo&Maggie]

Some background: I started No S seriously on 9/4/12 at 206. For a month or so I would gain weight on the weekend and lose the same weight during the week, undoubtedly because I did well during the week (and I still do). Sadly, things have changed. I'm now up about 10 lbs., and I'm at the point where it's starting to negatively affect my life (clothes are tight, I fear that people I know notice that I'm getting fat AGAIN, depression). I continue to exercise, but it's limited to the stationary bicycle and swimming because of a stress fracture in my foot that won't heel, but I do try to go to the gym at least 3X/week. I admit that even though I am doing well on No S days, it doesn't mean I'm eating the "right" foods and that my plate isn't completely covered. I'm also bingeing on the weekend, but it does feel like it's letting up a bit. The first time I participated in this discussion, I got some really good feedback when I said I wasn't losing, mostly people telling me to calm down because I haven't done No S long enough to see any changes. I think they said to give it six months. At this point, forcing myself to eat the "right" foods on No S days or putting any restrictions on what I eat on S days would be disasterous because it will make be feel like I'm on a diet. I committed to No S because I believe it will help stop my self-destructive behaviors without doing a traditional diet, and I want to give it time to do it. I'm not naive enough to think that things will change without my making some sacrifices, but I feel like I'm starting to heal and don't want to get into negative restrictions. Does this mean I'm going to keep gaining weight? Please tell me I don't have to go back to Weight Watchers. I believe No S will work, but I cannot keep gaining weight. I guess I really want to hear folks telling me what emotions they experienced during their journey with No S. I haven't seen a lot of that in the other posts.
P.S. I read one post today about a very successful No S'er who decided she wanted to start weighing herself every day. If there is anything I need to stop, it's practicing that OC behavior. Sometimes I weigh myself three times to try and get the lowest reading possible. I urge her not to make this part of her life.

[wosnes]

The bottom line is that if you want to lose weight, you need to eat less. You can do it eating what you eat now.

[Mo&Maggie]

The bottom line is that if you want to lose weight, you need to eat less. You can do it eating what you eat now.

Thanks for your comment. How can I do it eating what I eat know? Or do you mean by reducing quantity but eating the same food? That's the conundrum.[/quote]

[ironchef]

At this point, forcing myself to eat the "right" foods on No S days or putting any restrictions on what I eat on S days would be disasterous because it will make be feel like I'm on a diet.

I never force myself to eat any food because it is "good", this tends to rebound in that I eat more and more, hoping that eventually some of it will taste good! I also have no restrictions on S days.

I would suggest you stay with S days as they are, keep eating food you like on N days and work on slowly reducing N day portions. Put what you want to eat on your plate, just less of it.

I can't address the emotional side, as most of my emotion at the moment is ruled by my level of sleep (or lack thereof). When I'm at my lowest, No-S is in fact a positive, as my eating is one thing in my life where I feel in control.

[wosnes]

The bottom line is that if you want to lose weight, you need to eat less. You can do it eating what you eat now.

Thanks for your comment. How can I do it eating what I eat know? Or do you mean by reducing quantity but eating the same food? That's the conundrum.

[/quote]

I thought I was pretty clear -- eat less of the same food you eat now.

I'm assuming you're eating a lot of processed foods. Ideally I'd suggest eating more whole, real food. I don't see that as a "diet," in fact, I find it much more enjoyable than processed foods. But if it would seem like a diet to you, just eat what you're currently eating (but less).

[BrightAngel]

I thought I was pretty clear --
eat less of the same food you eat now.

Ideally I'd suggest eating more whole, real food.
I don't see that as a "diet," in fact, I find it much more enjoyable than processed foods.
But if it would seem like a diet to you,
just eat what you're currently eating (but less).

Good Advice.

[milliem]

Are you eating a lot of pre prepared, takeaway or restaurant food? Sometimes it can be really hard to estimate what is a 'normal' portion of such foods, or a seemingly reasonable sounding meal can have an awful lot of calories. While NoS isn't about counting, simple maths tells us that you must be eating more calories in a week than you are burning!

There's a few things you can try that don't involve changing what you eat very much. If you are eating out a lot, maybe try making the meals you love at home instead - at least you'll know what's going in it! Order or make a smaller portion than you have been. Find some veggies or fruits that you love and put those on your plate first, only fill the remaining space with other food. Make sure you aren't stacking! Perhaps try and increase the 'white space' on your plate. Check that your plates aren't actually huge (I think a normal sized dinner plate is about 9-10 inches across before the rim?)

Good luck

[wosnes]

(I think a normal sized dinner plate is about 9-10 inches across before the rim?)

I think they're about 10-10 1/2" inches including the rim.

[kccc]

I tend to respond better to "do these good things" rather than "you can't/shouldn't do these bad things." And I think a lot of people do.

Suggestions
- Eat more fruits/veg each day (set a reasonable target)
- Drink more water
- Eat more home-cooking
- Eat fish (or beans) so many times per week

Look for "good for you foods" that you genuinely LIKE, but don't always serve, maybe because they're expensive or troublesome to prepare. Tell yourself that you're worth it, and have those foods!

Also, celebrate any progress you've made. Have you broken the snack/sweet habit? Hurrah! Do you stick to one plate at each meal! Hurrah! Those are habits you can build on. Just pick a "next habit" to build and keep adding - gently, without making yourself crazy.

Good luck!

[Nicest of the Damned]

You don't have to get rid of all your negative emotions before you can lose weight. If that were true, then it would be even harder than it already is to lose weight. No one would ever be able to do it, because everybody has negative emotions.

When I started No S, I felt angry and resentful when I couldn't eat until I felt stuffed. This even though I knew I would feel uncomfortably full later. I would sometimes feel panicky about being hungry and not being able to eat, even though intellectually I knew full well that I wasn't going to starve. Those feelings can't always be reasoned with. They do get better, but it takes time, and if there's a way to speed up that process, I don't know what it is.

If you're not able to exercise as much or as vigorously as you could before you had the stress fracture, it's not too surprising that you're gaining weight. There may not be much you can do about that, other than wait for it to heal.

[Gayla]

I think one of the most important things to focus on is the success you are having around the behavior. I get the impression that you are focusing on the outcome. The outcome around our bodies is very slow and you will be forever disappointed if you are looking for reward in the scale. The reward is in the fact that you are following Your Values around food. So, I assume that when you started this you made a few decisions. I can determine that you didn't think that traditional dieting was what you wanted to do, I hear you saying that exercise is important to you and that eating healthy is also one of your values. It seems that you are being successful at staying on the plan, and that you are exercising. I think the right move for you now (to stay in line with YOUR values) is to start to put in healthy foods. Then celebrate!!! Celebrate how you are following your values! and let the outcome go! Likely, your brain is going to go back to evaluating your body and and wondering what your weight is. Just know that it believes that this tactic will protect you from feeling bad. But it doesn't work. Our brains lie to us all the time. It tells you that you will feel better when you weigh repeatedly...but you know it is not true! Did this make any sense?I encourage you to write down your values around your health and then next to it write down the behavior that supports that behavior. I suspect that weighing multiple times daily is not one of your values...but I could be wrong.

[oolala53]

Do you ever get legitimately hungry? Not just an urge to eat, but real, stomach-empty hungry?

[Nicest of the Damned]

Do you ever get legitimately hungry? Not just an urge to eat, but real, stomach-empty hungry?

After two years of No S, I still can't tell the difference. The great thing about No S is, I don't have to. Even if you are legitimately hungry, being hungry for 12 hours or so is not going to hurt you, assuming you have a normal metabolism and are not underweight to start with.

Thanks for your comment. How can I do it eating what I eat know? Or do you mean by reducing quantity but eating the same food?

You eat the same food, just less of it. If your problem is that you're eating too much, does it really make sense to try to fix that problem by eating more of something?

You can lose weight while eating junk food:

http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/11/08/tw ... index.html

That's not necessarily a good diet to follow, but someone has lost weight by doing so.

At least for me, No S selectively cuts down on some of the worst foods from my diet. Most sweets are not good for you, we all know that. I like salty snacks, which everybody also knows are not good for you. But I don't tend to eat them at meal time, at least not very often.

[oolala53]

I can tell the difference and if someone is not losing weight while sticking to the rules, it could be worthwhile. If you are never getting hungry, it's likely you are eating more dense foods than you need to on your plate and it could be part of the incentive to add more lighter foods and less dense ones while still having a full plate.