Everyday Systems

I cannot stop binging. It's ridiculous.

What has everyone's experience been with therapists?

I had bulimia for years, I had some counselling for it, to be honest it didn't help me much but I'm not a great talker either. I did read brain over binge a while ago and I found it very good. Take care x. I know how crap it feels, I binged yesterday, and I feel awful today mentally and physically:(

I've been binging every day for weeks... ): I feel hopeless.

Can you describe your bingeing? The reason I ask is that I tend to think of it as being worse than many people who say they are bingeing describe it.

BritishFool, I go through periods where I am binging everyday. Luckily, I usually end up getting it under control for awhile, and then inevitably it starts again. But, I believe the key is NOT, NOT EVER, give up trying. Even if I gain a few, it can come off easily with a few No Binging days. But if I stopped bothering to try, Id just be back at the weight I used to be.

I've never been in therapy or anything of the sort. I have no doubts/opinions/experience on the merits of it, but I guess I was raised to fix things yourself. So I manage on my own.

I guess my success typically lies in partially addressing why I'm binging (i.e. feel too restricted, and one small, irrelevant fail will send me into a tailspin) and then coming up with a solution (i.e. no foods off-limits, but it has to be eaten with a meal, take away the one plate rule and just eat to satisfaction, look forward to a daily reward etc). The other part of success over binging for me, it to tell myself, plain and simply, just not to do it. Sounds ridiculous, but at some point it boils down to getting tough with ourselves and saying "Stop acting like a baby whining for something! You are not allowed!" It works sometimes.

All the best. I know personally how tough it is.

BritishFool wrote:I cannot stop binging. It's ridiculous.

What has everyone's experience been with therapists?

In my past, I had about 20 years of Therapy,
and all during that time, Binge eating was one of the main issues I worked on.
Therapy did not help me stop Binge eating,
but it did help me to accept myself WHILE I was doing it.
If you are interested in learning more about this,
check out the Archieves in DietHobby for some of my related articles.

Following No S has helped me to limit binge eating to S Days and make me feel more in control in general. On Friday, I weighed exactly the same as I had the day I started No S four years ago, but that isn't exactly the No S Diet's fault: I kept tweaking. At any rate, I think the biggest benefit for me of No S is that I am not always on the edge of a cliff with binge eating. People are different, and you may not have the same problem I have, but I think my binge eating developed as my body's natural (and therefore not dysfunctional) reaction to the restrictive eating of dieting. Dieting creates a starvation effect, and the body reacts. Years of dieting led to binge eating. Food for thought.... Have you tried No S?
Kathleen

I've been trying desperately to get started. I've had a couple good days here and there. Yesterday was a great day. (:

No S has helped me tremendously with decreasing bingeing (after 38 years and lots of mostly anti-diet reading). Bingeing was the main reason I started the plan. I knew the bingeing would likely keep getting worse and I needed an eating plan I considered fair to counteract it. Eating what I want except sweets three times a day seemed fair and I knew that an urge to eat at any other time was a fake need for food, so it is okay to tolerate the feelings. I am not damaging myself by waiting to eat, as I used to sometimes convince myself I was doing.

Someone else mentioned Brain Over Binge and I've heard good things on another board, too. I know I used some of the techniques on my own before I ever read her version. I did read the book the author says was her inspiration. Even though I haven't read her (Kathryn Hansen) book, I think I'd recommend it because her mentor, Jack Trimpsey hates the disease model of addictions and spends a lot of time bad-mouthing other therapies, and I believe she spends less time on that. Hansen has a website and you can glean a lot from it for free. Most of it is just recognizing that the binge urge is reinforced in an inner part of the brain where emotions rule, and that you can use your higher cognitive abilities to decide NOT to eat in response to the urges. I know you think you CAN"T stop, but it just isn't true. You just haven't gotten the hang of saying no and you have practiced saying yes to every food whim for probably quite a long time. For Hansen, it was an immediate turnaround, but don't put that pressure on yourself. Just know that you can keep widening the gaps between episodes until they are the exception, not the norm.

I think eating disorder therapy has improved but I also think that the No S model of three meals a day is superior to what many of the programs recommend, which is either the 5-6 meal/snack model or intuitive eating. I just believe limiting yourself to three decisions a day to eat is smarter. I'll never go back, at least as long as I can have my milky coffee or mocha in between.

Don't know if this has helped, but your case is not hopeless. Write to me separately, if you like.

BritishFool wrote:I've been trying desperately to get started. I've had a couple good days here and there. Yesterday was a great day. (:

I'm glad yesterday was great - well done

So, you are having a few good days, which means this:

I cannot stop binging. It's ridiculous.

is no longer accurate.

I've always like the advice I read on here (perhaps from KCCC): Rather than say you "can't stop binge eating", say to yourself "you haven't yet stopped binge eating". Or "I am working to improve my binge eating habits". I know you can do it, because you are doing it, just not every day yet. Soon you'll have more green days, and eventually more green than red.

Thanks for your support everyone. (: I read some of Jack Trimsey's stuff and it's really seeming to help me right now.

I'll be sure to keep updating. (: