cedar, if you know it's coming, don't be afraid to take your sweet at a later time than your regular meal--just count it as part of the previous meal. Like I mentioned before, if I know that we're going out for ice cream after dinner, or if I'm meeting a friend for coffee, I make sure to leave room and not have a sweet from the previous meal so that I can enjoy something later.
Obviously, this doesn't work when there are "unplanned" events. Case in point--one day during my two-month period of losing weight, I had already had my sweet with dinner. The family later decided to do a DQ trip. Since I already had dessert, I declined having anything from DQ. A bit disappointing for me, but keeping with my plan (and seeing the results from said plan) outweighed missing some DQ treats!
In your weekend example, the brownie could be considered the sweet that went with your lunch (as you listed), or if you made them unexpectedly between lunch and dinner, they could count as your dinner sweet if you already had a sweet with lunch. If you know you'll make them after dinner is over, you could include the brownie as the sweet part of your dinner, and not have a sweet during scheduled dinner time.
The timing/plating isn't always as important as the making space. In a perfect day when you can sit down to three planned, plated meals--great! Everything can be served at mealtime. When you know planned sweets or treats will be available or made between meals, budget them into whichever meal you prefer.
The white-knuckling approach will have to suffice for all the unplanned sweets, unfortunately!
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I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.
~Jimmy Dean
The second you overcomplicate it is the second it becomes the thing for which it is a corrective.
~El Fug, on the NoS Diet