Alene's Check-in

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

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alene1
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Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Tue Sep 17, 2019 2:07 pm

Good morning! I've been reading journals this morning and have been inspired by those who have been able to stay the course and be consistent with No-s for so long. I think that many of us struggle with hopping around from plan to plan, looking for the "perfect" one. Simple is good. Simple is sustainable. My hope for myself is to create consistency and normalcy, enjoy my food, and live my life! 3 good meals. Beginning today. Thanks to all for the inspiration. I love your calm voices of reason.

Food and weight and dieting is such a distraction from life!! Honestly, it makes me a bit heartsick to think of all the time and energy this has stolen from me over a life time. There are so many other things that are more valuable and interesting to spend my time and thoughts on. I am going to strive to put food and eating into it's proper place. More later, but all I have time for now. It's good to have a space to write.

automatedeating
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Tue Sep 17, 2019 3:49 pm

Hi Alene! What a pretty name you have! I look forward to reading about your journey. Food is all about our insides, ya know? It is so not just a superficial thing to our lives.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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lpearlmom
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Tue Sep 17, 2019 7:57 pm

Welcome! Alene was the name of one of my best friends when I was growing up so gives me fond memories.

This is a great, supportive group of ppl. So glad you’re joining us!
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Wed Sep 18, 2019 1:53 pm

Automatedeating, thanks for coming by my journal. I've read some of your journal and you are one that has inspired me with your consistency! Thank you for the compliment. The nurse my mom had when she gave birth to me was named Alene. :) Yes, food and eating are really interesting subjects, when you think about all the joy and struggles it brings!

Lpearlmom, I'm glad my name has brought up fond memories! :) It seems like a wonderful group of people. Thanks so much for the welcome.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Wed Sep 18, 2019 2:08 pm

Yesterday didn't go as I had planned. I should give some back story as I begin my journal. I have struggled with binge eating for many years, really as long as I can remember going back to my very early years. I've been fighting it and trying different eating plans all my life. I reached my goal weight of 145 in 2015 following a commercial, structured program, starting at 195. Today I'm at 181 or so.

I've come across a book recently that has really resonated with me, called Lean Habits. I believe with all my heart the only way to create good health is through creating good, strong habits - not following a diet. So her book, along with the No - S, really work together with the same message. She has recently started a podcast called Breaking Up with Binge Eating, that is wonderful. She also does a 6 month program of the same name. I'm planning to enroll when it's posted. She says when you're just beginning this journey to break up with binge eating, her 3-4 meals a day habit isn't the best fit. She says that 5-6 meals is best until you grow your emotional coping skills. So, I have been torn between wanting to do the 3-4 meals and following her advice. Unfortunately, trying to do 3 meals has made me feel very restricted and lead to binges, as happened yesterday. I have felt quite conflicted about what to do, as I want so much both to lose weight, and to stop bingeing. So I have been living somewhere in the middle, without a straight course. After yesterday, I am thinking I should add in that 4th mini-meal in the afternoon as a tweak to this program.

Today I'm going to plan for 4 meals. I think that's going to work better for me. I know that being in the middle with no clear goal isn't working for me. So, for now, 4 meals it is, and I will report how that goes for me!

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Soprano » Wed Sep 18, 2019 6:06 pm

Sorry to hear about your binge eating. Lots of theories about it and solutions. Follow your instinct about how many meals. I would also suggest ensuring you choose meals you enjoy and take the time to enjoy the food.

Good luck

Jx
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

automatedeating
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Wed Sep 18, 2019 6:49 pm

I love Soprano's suggestion of finding meals you really love. I think that is absolutely key to sustainability.
Also, the 4 meals a day is a great focus. Consistency in the meal times and content is so useful for habit-building.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Whosonfirst » Thu Sep 19, 2019 12:23 am

Hi Alene, Welcome and I hope you find some sanity to your eating habits here on NoS. My son's family just moved over to your state from Portland in August. Beautiful area.

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lpearlmom
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Thu Sep 19, 2019 12:50 am

You can definitely adapt NoS to 4 or 5 meals. Like you said it’s just the consistency that matters. Maybe just use smaller plates? From my experience, most binge eating comes from restriction so following a plan that eliminates that feeling would be key I’d think. You can always progress to 3 plates later down the road when your bingeing has calmed down a bit.

Anyway, I hope you find a plan that suits you!

Linda
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Sep 19, 2019 1:28 pm

Soprano, thank you for the encouragement to follow my instincts about how many meals to start out with. I have been fighting the natural eating pattern my body feels best at, and that doesn't make any sense, especially right now. Down the road I will probably be able to gently shift my patterns.

Auto, consistency is my word for the year. More and more I come back to that as the key to lifelong health and well being. Creating good habits and following them consistently.

Whosonfirst, I am already feeling so much more "sane" than I have in many times of my life. Finding the program I'm going to be joining has given me a lot of hope, as well as the encouragement of this wonderful group. I realized yesterday just how much I need that in my life! I got married and moved to a new area of the state that is much different, and away from all my local friends. I am really feeling that empty space of meeting with my women friends in person filled. I love Portland as well as my state! So much beauty. I love hiking and the outdoors.

Lpearlmom, you hit the nail on the head about restriction and binge eating. As soon as I start restricting the binge eating amps up. It's hard to set aside the weight loss, but I know over time I can put some focus on that gently.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Sep 19, 2019 1:45 pm

Yesterday went so much better! Food and eating felt really good. I have 3 meals, a snack in the afternoon, and what I call a "closer." A little something after dinner that ends the day of eating with enjoyment and pleasure. So technically 5 eating occasions. I try to have it shortly after dinner, and may end up having it along with my dinner over time. But I don't know. That's about following someone else's rules about what is best for my body. I will just have to see what my mind and body say about that! I want to eat in a way that brings me the the most joy with the least restriction needed for health and well being. Right now my focus is on consistency and not binge eating.

My other habit is to get into a consistent routine with my exercise. I really like to hike, walk, and do exercise dvd's. I was quite consistent in the summer, and generally am, but I'm a teacher and just started school so I'm adjusting to my new schedule and in the busyness of starting up the school year. My goal is 10+ minutes of some kind of movement every day. 5/7 days would be just fine. I'm trying to decide if I want my exercise time to be before school or after. I do love my early mornings in the classroom getting organized when it's nice and peaceful and no one there but me. :) I have two paraeducators that come in before the kids. I will probably need to be flexible about the exercise depending on the meetings I have.

I met with parents yesterday and really enjoyed seeing the kids. I teach special education preschool and some of my students are returning. So sweet! I love the little ones for their innocence and ability to help me be in the moment with them. They make me smile more than anyone else. :)

Thanks to everyone for the support here in my journal. I feel so fortunate to have found this wonderful group. I will be coming to visit journals soon when life slows down just a bit! Good day to all.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Thu Sep 19, 2019 3:48 pm

I want to eat in a way that brings me the the most joy with the least restriction needed for health and well being.
Bravo!!!
Also, I am in Washington state too. :-) And a teacher, although I teach adults. Preschoolers give me panic attacks. :lol:

Oh, and I just got a Versa 2 fitbit and it is lighting up my day. :-) I love my cute pink watch. Very fun gadget for exercise motivation.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Thu Sep 19, 2019 4:34 pm

Great job with the eating! You have to find what works best for you, not someone else. I think that’s key!
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

Soprano
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Soprano » Thu Sep 19, 2019 9:21 pm

You've got this, sorting the bingeing first is important.

Jx
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Sep 20, 2019 2:15 pm

Auto, a fellow teacher! I bet teaching adults is fun too. You made me laugh about pre-schoolers. :D They are a bundle of energy, but oh so cute!! I have a Fitbit too, and have for many years. I write down my daily stats too in my paper journal.

Linda, you are so right. It's all about what works for me!

Soprano, it's hard to put that goal first, but I know I'll just keep treading water, or worse, if I keep up this diet-binge cycle. It's the road to nowhere. Onward and forward I go, one day at a time!

Yesterday was a good day, with some real victories. I followed my eating pattern, even though there were some challenges that would have taken me off course in the past. I was out shopping for clothes - a great thing in itself because I need and want to feel put together and attractive in my clothes, even though I'm a bigger size than I would like to be right now. But I went after work and started getting hungry at dinner time. I decided to get a pretzel at the mall. It was sooooo good! In the past I would have "eaten cuz I ate." Because it isn't a food I would typically have allowed unless I was "off" a diet, my mind would normally go into binge mode, and ask, "what's next??" Bring it on. But I was able to talk it through, think about how my body was feeling, and decide that I would just call it my dinner. I was pretty full. I did have my evening snack, with some protein, because I could feel my body needed it. Not ideal of course, but being able to manage it without setting off the downward spiral felt wonderful! I even told my husband what I had for dinner. Typically I wouldn't have, because though he knows I struggle a lot with food I haven't shared the full extent of it. So, I feel really good about the day.

No exercise though. I may be able to squeeze in my 10 minutes this morning. Otherwise I'm going to get it in somewhere today! Maybe a walk at lunch.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by oolala53 » Sat Sep 21, 2019 12:43 am

Good Lord, there can be a lot on a thread even when it's not very old!

I want to "weigh in" on the binge stuff. I was a big binge/compulsive overeater for decades. I observed as time went on that it was actually in the first three hours after a meal that I felt the most urge to start the random eating that would often lead to more. If I could get past that, I could actually go much longer (though there were some days in the first year that I ate rather early dinners.) The longer gaps between meals was crucial for me. And getting really hungry actually rarely led to bingeing because I was so determined to actually enjoy my meals. Not giving in to the habit/seduction of frequent food helped me turn a corner. I always knew I had a good meal coming. I DID drink decaf mocha in between, though. I just didn't want to chew. I had actually faithfully prepared three meals and two snacks- "healthy" ones for nearly a decade but eating that often never stopped me from bingeing. (At the beginning, I would "roll" the snack foods into adjoining meals, but after a time, I ate less at the meals, and it was enough.)

In any case, no matter how you start, you will end up adjusting as you go, in frequency and plate-content. Just about all successful maintainers adjust basic plans as time goes on.

I went through a lot of phases with No S and am in my most recent one now. Best wishes!
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 9 years & counting
Age 65
SBMI Jan/10-30.8
Jan/12-26.8
Mar/13-24.9 Stayed at +/- 8-lb. for three years Sept/17 22.8 (but more fluctuation)
Mar/18 22.2

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Sep 23, 2019 1:02 pm

Oohlala, thanks for coming by my journal and sharing your experience. We are all different, and as you say, it's going to change over time as we change and adjust to our new routines. So far for me giving myself permission to have those snacks has really taken away the feeling that I'm "falling off the wagon," which for me leads to binge eating. Having too many rules around eating is a trigger for me. That said, I've not been having a snack between breakfast and lunch, as I realize that my mind and body are generally okay with waiting and dealing with some gentle hunger in the morning. As you said, things will continue to change week to week and month to month. My first priority during this time is not to binge. I'm being really gentle with myself right now.

It was a good weekend. I followed my general meal pattern each day, and I got in a 30 minute cardio dvd yesterday. No binges for 5 days! :)

Today is the first day of school, and I know my relatively stress-free period of time (summer) is coming to an end. :wink: Mondays are also traditionally a day that I have binged. Getting back into the routine and just a general unsettled feeling transitioning from weekend to weekday. We shall see how it goes today. I have planned in the option for a morning snack today if I want it. Either for hunger or emotional comfort. I may also try a cup of English breakfast tea with cream and a little sugar. We shall see how it goes! I'm excited to see the kids.

Good day to all!

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lpearlmom
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Mon Sep 23, 2019 5:05 pm

Hope your first day went well and that NoS will help things during the school year. Love that you’re excited to see the kids. What grade?
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Tue Sep 24, 2019 1:49 pm

Hi Linda. I teach special ed preschool, so 3-5 year olds. It was a day alright!! :wink: :!:

Oh boy, it was quite a first day. Lots of chaos as we figured out which kids were coming on what buses, parents and sibling milling, a child crying. I didn't do well with the stress. We have a morning recess, and an afternoon recess, and I stress-ate at both times when my teaching assistants took them out. I just don't do well with chaos at all. I like calm and structure and this was anything but. I didn't expect calm and structure, but this was out of my comfort zone! It was the first day and I knew it would be hectic. I'm going to change some things up so that I have a better day. I will plan out my morning and afternoon snacks, and I will also have some things ready to use as calming tools. I did this last year too. My calming music will be turned on, and I can do some coloring in my adult coloring book with the gel pens I love. :) I am really going to focus on flowing with it instead of fighting it. Today will be better ..... I think!

In other news, the program opened up called Breaking Up with Binge Eating, and I signed up. I'm really, really excited about being part of it and being supported in that way.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Tue Sep 24, 2019 9:48 pm

Alene - the Breaking up with Binge Eating program sounds like a fantastic support program! Good for you to find something like that and be proactive.

Good luck with remaining calm amidst the chaos of the beginning days! Bravo for planning your snacks & meals for tomorrow. Let us know how it goes.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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lpearlmom
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Wed Sep 25, 2019 4:50 am

I don’t do well with chaos either so I totally get it. Im sure things will calm down a bit. I used to teach preschool. I kind of miss it but it’s definitely challenging and I’m sure special needs has it’s own layer of extra challenges as well.

Great job regrouping and problem solving. You will get there and it doesn’t have to be perfect. πŸ’œ
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Wed Sep 25, 2019 1:58 pm

Auto, yes, I think it's going to be so helpful! We start on Monday.

Linda, yes, my students are all in such different places and levels, so it's very difficult to give everyone what they need. But I just need to do the best I can and love them up, and teach them how to be good and kind people.

The saying, "best laid plans," is very fitting for my day yesterday! I went to our morning meeting and someone brought in a box of donuts. Ugh. Why? Really and truly none of us need donuts right after breakfast. Oh well. I can't change anyone but me! I had that feeling pop up, the fear of missing out feeling. I love donuts, and in the past I have said no thanks to the donuts, but then later come back and had more than one in secret. I was trying to avoid that, so I took one to my classroom. I ended up having it while I did my planning, and I wasn't hungry. It took me off my center and the sugar didn't help either I'm sure. It just led to a don't care kind of feeling and with the stress of the day I didn't have the energy to combat it, or even really try. Today is another day, and I am just going to remember the goal here is 6 eating occasions - 3 meals and 3 snacks. No judgement for what I eat, as that just backfires on me. Once I do that consistently I will move onto the next goal.

No exercise. I had an eye appointment after school, and didn't get home till 6. I will get in the flow soon! :)

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Wed Sep 25, 2019 2:24 pm

Oh, my. First week back schedule "discombobulation". I so know that feeling.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Sep 26, 2019 2:13 pm

Auto, it's real!! Yesterday was much better though.

Yesterday definitely was an improvement. My routine is getting streamlined and the kids are getting more settled. I used some of my tools to soothe and calm myself during recess breaks. I turned on my music and did a little bit of coloring with my gel pens. It really gets me into the moment. I had my planned morning snack, a good lunch, and then the afternoon turned into a bit of a snack fest. I had a training after school that felt stupid and pointless to me. I really hate that feeling of being trapped with no choice but to stay there. One of the mom's had sent cupcakes for her daughter's bday, and I ended up having one when we got done with the training. Also had several servings of crackers. We went out to dinner and I ate reasonably, and no evening snack.

What went well:

~ I really didn't think about those cupcakes and wanting to binge on them as I would have in the past. That's actually pretty huge for me! I knew I could have one if I really wanted to at one of my meals or snacks.

~ I planned my morning snack and enjoyed it, using some of my soothing tools to get back to center.
~ I listened to my hunger and fullness at dinner and stopped when I was full.
~ I thought about having an evening snack out of habit, but I wasn't hungry so I went to bed.

So, there is progress there! Hoping today will be even better. :)

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Thu Sep 26, 2019 2:24 pm

Excellent progress on the food planning front and managing the chaos! I suggest you bring your coloring TO the pointless meeting. Working at a community college, that is the only kind of meeting we have! I hate them! But now I bring my coloring and it takes me out of the intensity of the dislike. Hopefully your meetings aren't as soul-sucking as mine, but I still suggest the coloring! :-) Or just doodling - I do Zentangles and they are so awesome. I just use black pens for the doodles.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

oolala53
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by oolala53 » Thu Sep 26, 2019 6:58 pm

Isn't it a shame that so many meetings, which could potentially be useful, are not? And yet, as a high school teacher, I am still glad we came together periodically so that it didn't feel like we were all just separately pedaling our own race. And I was lucky that one of the small groups I worked with was congenial and usually productive.

An ex-colleague used to call in-services "Russian for a day."
Count plates, not calories. Three a day. 9 years & counting
Age 65
SBMI Jan/10-30.8
Jan/12-26.8
Mar/13-24.9 Stayed at +/- 8-lb. for three years Sept/17 22.8 (but more fluctuation)
Mar/18 22.2

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Sep 27, 2019 2:17 pm

Auto, great idea to bring my coloring to the meeting, or at least some doodling. :) I'll look into the one you mentioned. Anything that helps would be awesome! I've noticed that same pattern of hating feeling trapped in lots of areas of my life, but particularly in my work life. Not having control.

Oohlala, I agree with you about meeting with colleagues. I really enjoy when we meet for other reasons. I have a great team, and they are very supportive and helpful. This would just have been better done on our own computers, as it is a self-guided tutorial. I actually love learning new things that will be helpful to me as a teacher. I don't like doing things, "just because," or because someone else deemed this a good idea. :lol: I'm kind of a rebel that way.

Well, yesterday was so much better. Yay!! I had my 3 meals and 3 snacks, and didn't really need to use my stress-management techniques much. I am noticing a new willingness to have smaller snacks and see how that feels. I still have such a fear mentality about not enough and being hungry. I think those feelings will begin letting go as I know to my bones that it is all my choice.

I am missing my exercise so much. I have been so tired all week that it just isn't happening. But I love the connected feeling I have with my body when I exercise. Otherwise I start feeling like a head walking around without a body. :wink: I need to get to Trader Joe's this weekend and get stocked up with my lunch and snack fixings for the week.

No kids on Friday, as it is a prep and meeting day. We call Thursday, "first Friday." It truly is! Good day to all.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Sat Sep 28, 2019 5:31 am

Yay for first and second Fridays! I bet once you fully trust that you'll be getting regular meals and snacks, a lot that food anxiety will go away for you.

Sounds like you’re starting to get in your groove a bit! Enjoy your weekend!
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Tue Oct 01, 2019 1:40 pm

Good morning. I've had a good couple of days. I started my program and so far I'm enjoying it. It feels good to have a group of people who are all working on the same thing. It also feels good to have the support of the two coaches who truly understand binge eating and all the "stuff" around it. Mondays are almost always a binge day for me. But, I made it through yesterday! I also have a pretty bad cold so that is another factor that can make me tired and cranky and in, "don't care," mode. I laid down and rested all evening and slept pretty well, so that felt good.

Here's to a good Tuesday ahead!

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by lpearlmom » Tue Oct 01, 2019 10:48 pm

Yay! So glad you are getting support. It makes such a difference.

I know bingeing doesn’t feel good. I’ve come to think that bingeing is our bodies way of getting what we need when we over restrict but that’s probably too simplistic. Does this program have an overriding philosophy or is it a more multifaceted approach?
πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ Please no body or food shaming. Eyes on your own plate. πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

3/14-210 lbs;
3/19-163 lbs
7/6-176 lbs









Instagram "lpearlmom"

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Oct 03, 2019 2:04 pm

The program is multi-faceted. It's just beginning so I don't have the big picture yet. Right now we're focusing on creating a regular meal and snack pattern to stabilize and decrease binge eating. I will keep you posted! I have to say that the format isn't the best for me personally. There are so many posts and reading about other people's food issues can be triggering for me. Things I've already worked through or am making progress on and then I get mentally dragged back to not a great head space about them. There are people there who are still wanting to lose weight in this phase, even though it's about stabilizing, maintaining, and decreasing binge eating at this point. So, not perfect, but I will try and make it work for me. I'm more a small group, one to one kind of person. I will have all the email lessons and the podcast though if I just need to step back and use those.

I'm also struggling with the feeling of rules of any kind, or someone telling me what to do - like create a meal and snack schedule. I have such a feeling of push-back and rebellion around rules about eating. They are totally flexible about the schedule and have you pick it according to what you feel will work best, but it still feels like something I'm "supposed" to follow. I need to work through those feelings too. It felt better when I just listened to the podcast and the recommendation and did it on my own. There is so much mental stuff around these food issues!

Yesterday was a struggle at times. What went well:

I just had the one afternoon snack, even though it was early and it included urgent-feeling stress eating. After dinner out for work I thought about binge eating, but didn't. I had a protein bar in the car and ended up eating that even though I wasn't hungry. I thought about going to the store to get more food, but I couldn't think of anything that sounded that good. I could feel the fullness in my stomach and there just wasn't a strong drive there. I really feel like allowing myself all foods has helped so much with this. In the past I think I would have gone to the store and used the opportunity to get and eat forbidden foods.

No exercise all this week. I have a pretty good cold going on, and I'm low energy. I'm on the mend though so hopefully I'll be back to my usual self here soon. I am expecting my first grandchild somewhere around the 24th and I need to make sure I'm healthy!

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Fri Oct 04, 2019 3:09 am

How exciting! First grandchild!!!!

I am starting to see a trend on the boards - I think the changing of the seasons, with the changes in weather, schedules, and all the colds that come with it - are causing people to lose solid grip on habits and routines right now.

But your eating program sounds useful, although I get how reading through the posts can be triggering and difficult. I found that with an alcohol forum I am part of, and recently I have limited reading other people's questions for that very reason.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sun Nov 17, 2019 1:05 am

Hello again! I've missed this forum a lot. As I began my Breaking Up with Binge Eating program I just kind of drifted away. I don't have time tonight to do an update on that, but I'd like to mark my place here and say that I'm going to begin the quest again to do three meals a day with no snacks. I'll be back tomorrow to do an update.

Weight: 183.8
Exercise: 1H walk

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Nov 17, 2019 3:44 am

Nice long walk! I love those. They keep me grounded, balanced, happy!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Nov 18, 2019 2:10 pm

Auto, long walks are very therapeutic for me too. I always seem to work something out that has been gnawing on me.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Nov 18, 2019 2:29 pm

The weekend was a pretty good one. I got in some nice walks and I kept most of my eating at meal times. As I begin back again, I'm going to keep things flexed and allow for an afternoon snack if I really want it. I tried this weekend to eat a bigger lunch to keep me satisfied until dinner and I just hate doing that! I feel overfull and I don't enjoy my meal very much. With my history of binge eating I don't want to restrict myself and say I can't have an afternoon snack, or force myself to overeat at lunch so I can go 7 hours without getting overly hungry. So that is where I am with that. I'd much rather plan for something than feel like I'm "cheating," and then go off the rails.

My Breaking Up with Binge Eating program has been good. I love the two facilitators. They're extremely helpful and down to earth. I'm struggling to fully immerse myself in the program because I have gained several pounds and I have hit that spot where I just can't gain any more. I'm trying to use the principles, but have my own twist to how I'm eating. Truly I should be putting more of myself into it. I think I feel a bit of a rebel and maybe that's why I don't feel fully part of things there. My binge eating has decreased for sure. I am staying within the same 2-4 pound range, which is good. Anyway, I'm going to carry on with that and continue gleaning as much as I can from it. I definitely feel less distressed and more like I have a foundation under me with the support I'm getting there.

Sunday

Weight: 184.6
Exercise: 50M walk

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Mon Nov 18, 2019 4:02 pm

What in particular do you feel you are "rebelling" against? Try to be really specific, and then don't fight that rebel part. In my experience, embrace the rebel part and then find a way of eating that doesn't trigger your inner rebel. It takes time and energy and commitment to learn this stuff about yourself, but you are on your way!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Nov 28, 2019 2:49 pm

Auto, rebelling against anyone telling me what to eat, when to eat, how to eat.

Today I felt like starting a new journal, having a fresh start, but why? This is still my journey, continued. There is something in us that wants a shiny and new, fresh start with no mistakes in it. But that doesn't last long, because human beings aren't perfect and aren't capable of being so. I'm going to continue on right here, in this real and messy journey of life.

Happy Thanksgiving to all that celebrate! I'm going up to my son's in-laws today with most of the rest of my family. It's a 3 hour drive, and then we're staying in a bed and breakfast tonight and coming back tomorrow. It should be a really fun day. My first grandson was born on November 2nd, and I'm so excited to see him again. I do have a cold so I'm going to just have to restrain myself and adore from afar. I have had the worst cold for the last 2 1/2 weeks. It was about gone and then came roaring back, unless it's a new and different cold. I've never had that happen before.

Anyway, I'm really, really tired of all the excuses to myself of why I can't do vanilla no-s. I can. It won't be perfect but I can do this. It will be a big shift in the way I've been eating, but I am more and more convinced that eating multiple times a day is not healthy for me. I'm also becoming more and more focused on doing this for my health. I'm 53 with a history of weight issues and binge eating since I was a little girl. I don't know what all damage I have done to my body over this time, but it does worry me. I'm ready to drop the excuses and focus on my health. I CAN do this. It won't be easy, and it's out of my comfort zone, but I can do it. Fear of hunger, fear of missing out, fear of being restricted all come into play. But I know I can learn to embrace a new way of eating that will be healthier for my mind and body. I just need to give myself grace and get up every day and do the very best I can.

I need to re-read NoS and I'm going to listen to the podcasts again. They are really motivating for me. I'm going to track my BMI as many do here, as a reminder that I am focused on my long term health here, not a number on the scale. I'll also track exercise and steps. Here's to a great rest of 2019 and beginning 2020 on a good track.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Nov 28, 2019 2:51 pm

Thanksgiving

I can't remember if I can go back and edit in this forum, but I hope so! If not I will re-do the summary of my day in another post. I will check my BMI tomorrow or Monday to see my starting place.

S Day

Breakfast: turkey salami, slice cheddar, Special K Protein cereal w/almond milk, coffee w/cream
Midday: Coffee w/cream
Early dinner: One plate of Thanksgiving dinner, several glasses of white wine
Dessert: Sampler of 3 types of pie w/whipped cream

Exercise: 20M walk
Steps: 4,928 - we were in the car driving a good chunk of the day

Thoughts on food and life: I felt really good about my day. I was going to have a snack in the car on the way up there but realized I wasn't super hungry and could probably wait till our dinner. I did get hungry and my tummy got a bit growly, but it actually made me feel really good to wait, powerful and capable. I enjoyed all the food very much but didn't want a second helping of anything enough to go get it. I was very full and satisfied.

I have a cold so I couldn't hold my grandson, but it was so much fun to see him. He was wearing a little bow tie. :)
Last edited by alene1 on Fri Nov 29, 2019 9:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Thu Nov 28, 2019 3:14 pm

Happy Thanksgiving! You know, from a fellow Washingtonian - I had the "first cold, think I'm better, second worse sinus infection or something" a few weeks ago!! I wonder if was the same thing you got.

And hope your drive goes well and congrats on a grandbaby!!

Also, I am all for the one long journal - LOL you probably didn't need me to tell you that.

Oh, and definitely you can edit! I do it everyday by planning my meals and exercise first thing in the morning and then later updating on all kinds of things.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Nov 29, 2019 9:12 pm

Hi Auto. I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving too! Yes, there's a lot going around this year. Maybe it was the same thing. So far no signs of any infection. I'm actually feeling quite a bit better today with very little coughing and not much of a runny nose either.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Nov 29, 2019 9:16 pm

N Day

Breakfast: RX bar, mixed nuts, coffee w/cream
Lunch: low carb wrap w/tuna/mayo/dill relish, slice cheddar, apple w/PB
Dinner: turkey, boiled potatoes w/gravy, roll w/butter, steamed vegetable mix w/butter

Exercise: 55M walk
Steps: 10,101

Thoughts on food and life: It wasn't that hard at all not to snack between lunch and dinner, even though it was a long stretch. I think so much of it is mindset. Just making up your mind and not questioning it, embracing it. I know on a school day when I'm stressed it's a different story. That is the time I like to use food to soothe myself.

I was a little bit hungry before bed, and hungry this morning before I have my coffee. It was a pretty carb-heavy meal last night, and that's probably why.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sat Nov 30, 2019 1:32 pm

S Day

Breakfast: turkey salami, slice Swiss cheese, mixed nuts
Lunch: Mexican buffet w/family - one moderate plate
Snack: tall latte, 1 salted caramel
Dinner: bacon cheeseburger, about 1/3 of my fries

Exercise:1 hour walk
Steps: 10,675

We're planning on a nice long walk on the waterfront today, and then seeing the Mr. Roger's movie. I'm really looking forward to it! Today will probably include some popcorn and a piece of pumpkin pie. Actually, it didn't!

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sun Dec 01, 2019 2:09 pm

S Day

Breakfast: turkey salami, boiled egg, swiss cheese, mixed nuts
Lunch: leftover turkey and gravy, pear, Perfect bar
Snack: pumpkin pie w/whipped cream
Dinner: omelet w/bacon, cheddar, veggies
Snack: mini bag popcorn w/butter, 3 mini Perfect bars

Exercise: none
Steps: 3,465
BMI: 31.05

Thoughts on food and life: It's interesting. I'm finding I don't really feel much like talking about food and eating and weight. I think it's because eating is going well and I feel "normal," about food right now. I'd rather talk about more interesting things! That's a very good sign.

Yesterday we went to the Mr. Roger's movie. It was very, very good and I highly recommend it. We took a one hour walk on the waterfront. It was sunny and beautiful and Mt. Rainier was in it's full glory. Dinner out and we had a yummy meal.

I weighed today and will begin tracking my BMI only, which will put my focus on my health. I'm going to weigh once a week I believe. I have to say it was wonderful and freeing not to weigh for the last week. I do want to have some data points though on what is happening with my BMI. I'm also going to take measurements periodically and track my blood pressure.

Today I need to do some tidying and laundry around home and get ready for the new week. We've already done most of our grocery shopping, but I need to grab a couple things at Trader Joe's. Wishing everyone a nice Sunday.
Last edited by alene1 on Mon Dec 02, 2019 2:27 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Dec 01, 2019 2:18 pm

Is your boiled egg a hard-boiled egg or more like a poached egg? I've been loving my hard-boiled eggs and now I want to learn how to make them without the shell. I think that is like poaching them? I'm wondering if I can poach them and then refrigerate to eat each day, or if they go bad that way?

If I remember correctly, you are in school right now? Are you getting close to finals?
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sun Dec 01, 2019 2:29 pm

I actually buy a bag of boiled eggs from Trader Joe's. They're very tasty and are like homemade to me. I don't really care for poached eggs or make them, but I imagine they would taste much better made fresh each day. You could try though!

I'm a special education preschool teacher, so not in school. I will probably be taking classes this summer though. This break makes me long for Christmas break! I know you teach as well, and one of the major perks is the extra time off!

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Lizzy6 » Mon Dec 02, 2019 12:56 am

I don't like talking about food and diet either. When people try to figure out how, why, and what I eat, I usually shrug or give a vague answer.

alene1
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Dec 02, 2019 2:32 pm

Hi Lizzy. I think for me, it has been changing all the time due to my diet hopping, so it would never stay the same anyway! Kind of embarrassing to me too that I never stuck to anything. I think of this as my own journey, and I am figuring it out as I go.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Dec 02, 2019 2:38 pm

N Day - Red

Breakfast: oatmeal, turkey salami, slice swiss, mixed nuts, coffee w/cream
Lunch: tuna on low carb wrap w/cheddar, pear, Cheez-its, coffee w/cream
Snack: 2 fruit snacks, a couple nibbles of cereal, Cheez-its
Dinner: bacon, cheddar, veggie omelet
Snack: piece of pumpkin pie w/whipped cream, 2 mini Perfect bars, bowl of granola w/almond milk

Exercise: none
Steps: 9,054

Thoughts on food and life: I'm actually looking forward to getting back to N days today. Yesterday was a slug day with lots of reading and hanging around the house. We went out to our property yesterday for a while and did some cleanup. We're building a house and we are responsible for cleaning up occasionally during the different phases of the build. Luckily the rain had stopped while we were out there, so it was nice. I sat and looked at the water for a bit. There is a different kind of stillness in the winter, and quieter with the leaves off the trees and not rustling in the wind.

Lots of snacking yesterday. I had a bit of the "get it while you can," mentality with the sweets and snacks, but I expect over time that will be less. I just found out my most helpful teaching assistant is out sick, so this is going to be an interesting Monday!
Last edited by alene1 on Tue Dec 03, 2019 1:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Mon Dec 02, 2019 2:45 pm

Going out and cleaning up construction stuff on your property does NOT sound sluggish to me! :-)

And the peacefulness at the property - watching the water, I totally get it. I love my winter walks every bit as much as my summer ones. They just have a different "flavor", right?
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Tue Dec 03, 2019 1:15 pm

Auto, it was my only real activity in the day, so it felt that way! But it was great to get outside and do something productive.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Tue Dec 03, 2019 1:34 pm

N Day - RED

Breakfast: turkey salami, slice swiss, oatmeal, mixed nuts, coffee w/cream
Lunch: Power Bowl w/chicken, pear, Epic lemon bar
Snack: mini Perfect bar
Dinner: pork chop, green beans w/butter, salad w/Italian
Snack: Perfect bar

Exercise: none
Steps: 8,826

Thoughts on food and life: I have a lot of thoughts about yesterday. Hopefully you all can help me wade through them. I have to admit that after yesterday and the way I was feeling I felt like giving up. That I can't do this. It's too hard. Too different from what I usually do. That I can't go 5 days without sweets. What are sweets exactly? Trying to restrict sweets all week will set me up for binge eating when I "fall off the wagon." Which thoughts are true? Is it just a big adjustment for me to get to being able to do N days?

Okay, pulling apart some of the strands of my thoughts, and asking for feedback. What is a sweet? Is a package of fruit snacks a sweet? Is a Perfect bar a sweet? I don't have a problem not having things like candy bars or dessert during the week, but I've become accustomed to those two foods in particular. The fruit snacks because I'm a preschool teacher and have a cupboard of snacks that parents send in. They will always be around and I have to figure out how to deal with them. Having a packet with my lunch some days would be nice. I just worry if I ban them that I am setting myself up for failure. Thoughts?? The Perfect bars are mostly nut butter with some honey and a few other ingredients. But they are about 300 calories each. I am very resistant to giving them up, but feel they are probably something I am too attached too and probably should make an exit from my life anyway. Honestly, the thought of going 5 whole days with none of these pleasant foods seems really hard. Change can be hard, but that doesn't mean it's not a good idea and something that could enhance my life so much.

In the evening after dinner it's so nice to have something pleasant to look forward to. Would a cup of hot cocoa be a good way to move away from other less good choices?

Last night felt like a kick back against No-S and the no sweets rule. Will this lessen with time? I don't know. I hope so!! Are all of these thoughts excuses or real concerns. Being in my own head with these isn't very helpful. Please bring on the honest feedback!

I'm thankful for a new day. Yesterday was a crappy day at work. My para was out and I had a sub who I am quite certain is on the autism spectrum. He spent a good part of the morning pacing around the room, didn't really engage with the kids, and was in the bathroom several times for extended periods. So I sent him home at lunch, wondering how in the world he was able to sub as a para??!! Things were quite chaotic, and I felt like a failure. Sometimes it feels like you are holding things together by a thread. I have some pretty tough students and I had several I had to get out from under the table, peel off the sidewalk waiting for the bus, etc. I do take it really personally when things feel chaotic and behaviors are ramped up, like if I was a better teacher this wouldn't happen. I know I'm not a magician, and I can't control everything, but I didn't feel great at the end of the day. Mondays are hard anyway. I know today will be a better day. Just one of the tough ones.

I'm ready to begin the day with hopefulness and the belief that I can change.
Last edited by alene1 on Wed Dec 04, 2019 12:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Soprano » Tue Dec 03, 2019 3:09 pm

Lots of thoughts and no right or wong answers:
1. Find a non food treat to look forward to in the evenings
2. Save what you might spend on some treats for clothes or makeup
3. Put sweets or treats from parents in the staff room. Or give to a food kitchen.
4. Consider for now having an S day on a Wednesday to keep you going. I bet eventually you'll pass on it. 4 days on nos is better than none or a real binge.

This will work don't worry about being perfect. If each week you are more compliant then you are going in the right direction :)

Jx
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Tue Dec 03, 2019 3:25 pm

Well, first of all - that work day you had!!!! Those kind of stressful days are our triggers for seeking food as comfort. No wonder you had a red day on Monday!!!!! NoS (or anything in our life we try to change) is going to be its nastiest most difficult self on such days.

But. Today is a new day! Like you said.

So I read through your post twice. And you are asking all the great questions!! These are the questions that each of us must ask and then seek out (experimentally) what works best for us. You are on the path!

You CAN change. That is the key thing to know. Believe in yourself.
As you've mentioned on here before, NoS is a BIG change for you. So it might need to come in "installments"; for example, you've considered 4 meals a day instead of 3. That's OK! Do whatever works for you and gives you progress toward your goals.

What's a sweet? :-) That's for you to decide (in my opinion), although the technical "NoS" answer is that a sweet is any candy or desserts during the week. If you want to have fruit snacks with your lunch and you think that you will help your long-term compliance, go with it. Same with the Perfect Bars. I'm a big believer that we cannot stomp down our inner rebel - we need to listen to her and respect her and then try to find a compromise with her. Right now, if you feel very resistant to giving them up, I suggest you don't. Make them a welcome part of your daily meal plan. There may come a day (or not) when you don't feel that strong desire for them.

Hot cocoa in the evening sounds like a very reasonable way to have something to look forward to while you transition away from formal evening sweets.

You CAN change, Alene! 7 years ago I was living on fast food and ice cream. I've made so many changes along the way. Some of those changes I made very very gradually. I followed Vanilla NoS for years. Other changes were a bit more drastic, because I felt ready for them. Sometimes I made too big of a change at one time, and then sort of rebelled against that. It's all a part of the journey, and the more you reflect on what worked and what didn't work, the less you'll beat yourself up/shame yourself, etc. Just consider a red day information and feedback as you make your ongoing eating plans.

Personally, I would NEVER be able to go 5 days without pleasant foods! Through lots of experimentation, I have found "pleasant" foods for me that also aligned with the personal eating goals I had for myself. So in the early NoS days, I ate fast food regularly, pizza all the time, chips every day, hot dogs, granola bars, movie popcorn, etc. - all of these "fit" into the Vanilla rules of NoS. I don't know if everyone is as slow a project as I am (LOL!!!), but eventually I didn't need to eat those foods anymore to consider my food "pleasant".

Which reminds me - I do suggest that you plan your meals for the day. Of all the things I've tried over the years, it's given me the greatest success on a consistent basis. Just "plan" in those fruit snacks and Perfect bars and evening hot cocoa. :-)
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
Posts: 85
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Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Wed Dec 04, 2019 12:51 pm

Soprano, thanks for your advice and thoughts. I really appreciate it and know you are a voice of experience. I just need to have faith in myself and faith in NoS - and patience and perseverance to stay the course.

Auto, thank you for all the feedback. It was so very helpful. Knowing how far you've come is very encouraging to me. I also agree that the inner rebel doesn't do well with things being pulled away. If I gently move in the right direction then we can be on the same page. :) I appreciate the time you took to write such a thoughtful response. I really needed that vote of confidence!!! So much of this starts in the mind, and succeeds or fails due to what our thoughts tell us.Yes, I can do this. I'm going to baby-step my way there, my way, even if it doesn't look like anyone else's journey. I have to ask how you fit in popcorn? As a meal? :)
Last edited by alene1 on Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

alene1
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Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:18 pm

N Day - GREEN

Breakfast: turkey salami, slice swiss, oatmeal, mixed nuts
Lunch: chili w/a little cheese and sour cream, apple w/PB
Dinner: glass wine, pad Thai w/chicken

Exercise: none
Steps: 8,234

Lots of thinking again yesterday with the great feedback and thoughts I got yesterday. At this time I'm not ready to go straight NoS. It's more mental than physical though. I am still very attached to the emotional part of the snacks I have. I am very resistant to going from lunch until dinner with no snacks, and also completely giving up my evening snack. But, as I was thinking about it yesterday, I am fine with not having a morning snack. Breakfast fills me up enough and I can have a cup of tea. I am just much more able to tolerate hunger in the morning. In the afternoon I think a lot of it is stress relief, a break, something to look forward to during a stressful day with kids. Comfort. I will use a bridge to get between my meals, and then slowly have them be smaller, and maybe just drinks, and perhaps let them go at some point. That is the hope! Every day is a bit different, so some days I won't plan in something for the evening.

As far as it being a green or red day, as long as I stick to the planned meal or snack times, then it's a green day. I can have Perfect bars, protein bars, fruit snacks, and hot cocoa if I want them. Tonight I'm going to my son's house to spend time with my grandson. Ohhhh, that is food for my soul! I don't need an evening snack tonight. :)

I got some whole milk and some unsweetened cocoa last night. I'll add just enough sugar for some sweetness. I might add a little whipped cream. We'll see. Baby steps!

Auto, great suggestion to plan out my meals each day. I often do that, but I think it's particularly important to begin doing every day. S Days I won't plan out probably. Often there's no time for journaling in the morning as we're out and about early getting coffee and running around. If there's time I'll plan the best I can. Often we just go with the flow on weekends, especially Saturdays.

Yesterday was much, much better in all ways. I had a great day with the kids! I have a mix of 3 to 5 year olds, and my morning group is mostly late 3's and early 4's. Many of them just can't sit long enough for much of a story at circle time. My afternoon group is older and I have some going onto kinder next year. I love, love, love to read my kids books, and yesterday I had a special Christmas story to share with my older group. They all sat and were very engaged and excited by the story, and it was a long one! It was so much fun to share it with them, and have them appreciate it. I did some things differently yesterday, and I felt like a good teacher again. lol That often seems to happen with teaching. A day that is really hard and you question being a teacher, and the next a great day where you love it! I need to remember that the more excited and engaged I am, and the more interesting and hands-on activities I plan, the more the kids will want to learn and stay with me. I had a great parent meeting after work, and the day just went well overall

Eating was a lot better I did have some snacks, but since I didn't plan things ahead of time I made it a red day. I waited until 5 to have my mini Perfect bar, and no morning snack. Progress!
Last edited by alene1 on Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Soprano
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Soprano » Wed Dec 04, 2019 5:23 pm

The attachment to snacks will ease by doing what you are doing, ie giving yourself permission to eat them. Next step is make sure it's something you really want and eat it slowly savouring every bite :)

Jx
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

automatedeating
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Wed Dec 04, 2019 11:46 pm

I think your plan sounds like such a good fit for you! Love it!

About the teaching - my FIL, who taught for over 40 years, always told me,
Some days you think - "They pay me to do this?" and other days you think, "You couldn't pay me enough to do this." Teaching!!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Dec 05, 2019 5:52 pm

Soprano, I think you're right. Having the choice makes a huge difference in what I feel like doing!

Auto, I think it's going to work very well for me too. Yes, teaching can be an emotional roller coaster! Thankfully there are definitely the great days to keep us coming back. Ultimately, it's very rewarding.

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Thu Dec 05, 2019 6:00 pm

N Day - Green

Breakfast: Double smoked bacon, egg, and cheddar sandwich from Starbucks
Mid-morning: Nitro cold-brew sweet cream
Lunch: Panera half Goddess salad, cup broccoli cheddar soup, baguette w/butter
Dinner: hamburger patty w/ketchup, veggies w/butter, Perfect bar

Exercise: Burn It Up - 30M
Steps :7,195

Thoughts on food and life: I was very pleased with yesterday. I left after work to go visit my grandbaby, and had a snack with me if needed. I decided to wait and see how it went. I ended up not having the snack, and I was really pleased by that. I had a hearty dinner of a glass of wine and some Pad Thai. I wasn't really very hungry this morning until 9:30 or so. I was thinking yesterday that I think a big piece of the puzzle for me is creating really delicious and satisfying meals. Then I can really look forward to the meal itself instead of relying on snacks for my pleasure. I realized how much I have been limiting myself at meals to certain foods I felt were good for me, and not allowing certain foods out of habit. I think expanding my horizons to lots of different options for my lunches and dinners will really make a difference in my ability to eat mostly meals.

Today I have an IEP day, which means I get to work from home, (or Starbucks,) on my paperwork for school. I have progress reports and other assessments I need to do, so it will be a busy day today. I need to stay focused!
Last edited by alene1 on Fri Dec 06, 2019 2:20 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Soprano
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by Soprano » Thu Dec 05, 2019 6:14 pm

Whoop, glad you came to the conclusion about eating satisfying meals it is so important in helping you not to binge or eat between meals.

Go you

Jx
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Dec 06, 2019 2:05 pm

Thanks Soprano! Me too. :)

alene1
Posts: 85
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Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Fri Dec 06, 2019 2:20 pm

N Day - Red

Breakfast: turkey salami, slice swiss, oatmeal, mixed nuts, coffee w/cream
Lunch: frozen meal,pear, carrots w/almond butter, fruit snacks, coffee w/cream
Snack: sweet potato chips and artichoke dip (staff meeting)
Snack: Cheez-its and 2 fruit snacks
Dinner: Reuben sandwich, 2/3 of fries

Exercise: none
Steps: 6,584

Thoughts on food and life: Another good day yesterday! I was sitting at Starbucks yesterday eating my breakfast, and feeling very thankful. I felt like such a "normal" eater. I didn't have to worry that I was breaking some kind of diet because I was eating a yummy breakfast sandwich. I didn't have to count any calories. I could just sit and enjoy my sandwich and feel thankful. I was still a little hungry a bit later, so got the cold brew. It was so delicious. It does have some sugar in it, but mostly extra fat from the cream. I enjoyed every sip. I enjoyed my lunch at Panera, and had another moment of thankfulness. They gave me the wrong bread - a roll instead of the baguette. They left the roll and also brought the baguette. In the past that would have really set me up for binge mode. Free bread and the opportunity to eat it without anyone knowing. Also all those baked goods which could continue the binge. I didn't have any desire to eat the roll, and just threw it away. Panera baked goods are something that I used to binge on. I didn't even have the thought! I did notice the cookies when I was ordering, but it was an N day so no further thought of them. I knew I could have one on the weekend if I wanted it.

In the past this kind of change in schedule, and a full day out on my own with no one watching would have been a very likely binge day. Going to Costco for pizza, getting other treats like donuts or a cinnamon roll, etc. A sugar-laden fancy drink at Starbucks. I just feel so very thankful that I was able to enjoy the day the way that I did. :) Yay!

I have been binge-listening to the Everyday Systems podcasts, and decided to start the 14M of exercise on weekdays. I'm enjoying using the Habitcal and think that's going to be a very good thing for me. I actually really like to exercise but just haven't been making it happen since this school year started. I got in a good workout yesterday - half of one of my longer exercise dvd's. It's a mix of cardio and strength. Felt good about that.

I took my BP, and my waist and lower abdomen measurements. I'm going to take them every Friday. I'm not going to weigh myself. I'm not sure when I might again. I feel free. This practice puts my focus firmly on my health.

Better get going on my day. We don't have kids on Fridays so I'll be doing paperwork/assessments/meetings. I need to write an IEP this morning so I better get to it!
Last edited by alene1 on Sat Dec 07, 2019 1:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

automatedeating
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Fri Dec 06, 2019 3:37 pm

Alene - I feel like something has really "clicked" for this phase of your experimentation. Let the data - gathering begin! :-)
It's really exciting to see you finding your own unique path forward.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sat Dec 07, 2019 1:58 pm

Auto, thank you!! I feel the same way. Something feels different to me now, and it feels very good!

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sat Dec 07, 2019 2:08 pm

S Day

Breakfast: RX bar, swiss cheese slice, turkey salami, coffee w/cream
Lunch: turkey and provolone sandwich, apple, coffee w/cream
Snacks: 2 apple slices, small handful of nuts pre-workout
Dinner: pork and veggie stir fry w/rice
Snack: Perfect bar

Exercise: Core Cardio 30M
Steps: 7,365

Yesterday afternoon was difficult. We had our 2 1/2 hour staff meeting and someone always brings snacks. This snack was really delicious looking. I didn't have any for quite a while. But I did give in and have some part way through the meeting. The sweet potato chips and artichoke dip was as good as it looked, super yummy and hard to stop. When I got back to my room I had more snacks. I think it was the "eating cuz you ate," syndrome. I was in snack mode and just wanted to keep snacking. But I also have this real aversion to being trapped in classes and meetings with no escape. They make me feel rebellious for some reason. I have a history of not eating well during and after long staff meetings like that. I found myself wondering why people feel the need to bring these snacks. If you want snacks, bring them for yourself, but why drag other people into it? It's no wonder people gain weight during the holidays. It turns into snack and treat mode and all the usual customs go out the window.

Thinking about our next meeting and what I'll do. I think I'll get myself something salty and yummy to go with my lunch. Maybe even something like what I had yesterday. Of course someone might bring a sweet, which would be hard in a different way. I also thought about making our twice a month long meetings be "S events." Have a bit smaller lunch and plan to have something those two days. I guess I'll have to experiment.

Today is an S day, and we'll be out and about most of the day. I think I'll grab a sandwich or salad and bring a piece of fruit with me for lunch. We should be home for dinner. I'm planning on getting in a nice workout in the late afternoon.
Last edited by alene1 on Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:03 pm, edited 2 times in total.

automatedeating
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Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 2:16 pm

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Sat Dec 07, 2019 3:22 pm

You know, I don't know if this technique will work for you, but I use it very regularly....
When I see the snack/dessert/food item, I think "Yes, I know what that tastes like." I even roll around the known taste in my mouth and think - "yep, I'm sure I know what that will taste like." Then I think, "I don't really need that and afterwards I won't feel one bit better than I do right now. Not necessary for me."
It's a little ritual that I realize has become completely habitual and automatic for me.
These temptations DO require willpower from me, though, and that kind of pisses me off! Like you said, if they hadn't brought the food, I wouldn't have to deal with my "ritual of rejection" lol.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:05 pm

Auto, I like your ritual of rejection! :D I'll have to give that a try. In this particular case I had never tried the sweet potato chips before, and they looked so good. I will keep that in mind for the future. I might go get a coffee from Starbucks at my lunch to take with me to sip next time.

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:12 pm

S Day

Breakfast: turkey salami, swiss cheese slice, oatmeal, coffee w/cream
Lunch: Epic bar, orange, mixed nuts, grande cold brew w/sweet cream
Snack: small chocolate chip cookie, 1/3 or so of hot chocolate
Dinner: bacon cheeseburger w/fries - had most of burger and most of fries
Snack: one bite of DH's Perfect bar

Exercise: 25M walk
Steps: 7,343

I'd like to have some kind of a sweet today I think. Maybe when we go to dinner. We're also stopping by my husband's son's house to get his grandson, so he may have snacks/treats there. I feel like I want something yummy before the weekend is over. I'm not craving anything, but it feels like the weekdays will go better if I have a treat.

Yesterday was a good day. The sandwich I bought was okay, but not that great. Weekend lunches are hard because my husband just likes to have snacky foods like bars, fruit, nuts, and I like a "real" lunch. Figuring it out as we go along. We're taking a nice walk today at a favorite wildlife preserve nearby. Then going to pick up DH's grandson to take him on a Polar Express train ride. They have hot cocoa, wear their pajamas, and are read the story. We go pick up Santa and then he passes out toys on the way back. Should be a lot of fun! We're going to get dinner afterwards.

This morning I need to get some tidying and laundry done.
Last edited by alene1 on Mon Dec 09, 2019 2:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

automatedeating
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Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:24 pm

Your plans with the grandson sound fabulous! How fun, fun, fun!
Hope you get to have a really delicious and enjoyable sweet today. :-)
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8; 1/19-23.4; 2/19-22.7; 3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Dec 09, 2019 2:24 pm

Auto, we had a great time on the train ride! Our GS really enjoyed it and it was fun to spend some time alone with him. It's the first time I've done that with him. DH and I are newly married so I am just getting used to the idea of having step-grandchildren. I like it! :) It was funny being out with a young child again and co-grandparenting with DH. I think we make a pretty good team.

I didn't end up having a really enjoyable sweet. I did have a small cookie. It was fine, but nothing to write home about. It's kind of funny. I like my Perfect bars so much. If I have those I don't really crave sweets that much when I stop to think about it. If the opportunity presents itself at work then I DO think about it. I love things like donuts and cinnamon rolls, but only crave them when I'm in "binge" mode. They do the job of being delicious and numbing me out, and escape. I think that S days for me might be more about the freedom to have some snacks, and sweets if the opportunity presents itself. Especially on special days.

alene1
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 1:06 am
Location: Washington state

Re: Alene's Check-in

Post by alene1 » Mon Dec 09, 2019 2:33 pm

N Day

Breakfast: turkey salami, swiss cheese slice, oatmeal, mixed nuts
Lunch: (frozen meal, apple w/PB, possibly some kind of chip/dip)
Dinner: (salad with orange pepper, almond slices, Italian, rotisserie chicken, Perfect bar)

Exercise:
Steps:

Thoughts on food and life: I'm ready for a new week and stretch of N days. I'm excited to try again this week and put the things I've learned into practice. Thinking about the meals I have when we go out. My go-to's have been burgers, fries, fish and chips. I want to start looking more carefully at the rest of the menu. I think for so long I thought of salads as things I had when I was on a diet/low carbing, etc. I feel an aversion to having them on S days, and probably on other days too. But I actually really like salads. I think it might take me some time to realize that I have the rest of my life to have the burgers and fries and fish and chips, if I really want them. They aren't going away or going to become restricted in any way. I hope that over time I will relax about that and expand my horizons. I already feel like I'm getting tired of eating out a bit. I really do like eating healthier fare at home most of the time. I prefer a healthy, delicious meal and a Perfect bar to end it with. Very satisfying all the way around.

Only 8 more school days till winter break!! I'm very excited about it. I have a lot to do this week, and a lot I want to get ton after Christmas to get ready for the new year. Plus some hikes and probably one snow shoe. Better get to it!

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