Hhenders check-in

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

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hhenders
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Hhenders check-in

Post by hhenders » Tue Mar 29, 2016 4:22 am

My three S days this weekend were a quadruple whammy - anniversary party for the company I work for, my birthday, Easter, and Saturday/Sunday. I felt sick and in pain by the end of Sunday. Indulged too much. (I know it's okay/allowed, and I'm not worried about it - I just regret it because it was so uncomfortable!)

Anyway, today's a success. I'm usually very committed to my sweet tooth, but knowing I can add sugar to my tea and have sugar-added yogurt makes it okay. Having no "super sweet" foods but still having some added sugar is like this crazy moderate commonsensical thing, am I right?

Today, I packed no snacks for the afternoon. It was weird. Freeing. I've been a FIRM believer that I NEEDED an afternoon snack every day. But I had a big (but one-plate) lunch and still wasn't very hungry when dinnertime came around. And now I'm about to go to bed and I'm not hungry enough for a late-night snack. Weird...

Feeling optimistic!
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Wed Mar 30, 2016 4:14 am

I'm calling today a win with a little "virtual plating." Dinner out was not good and I didn't eat much of it and it was too early in the day, so I'm going to eat some more to basically finish my dinner late.

I tried white-knuckling it with hot tea with milk and sugar, and although it wasn't enough to make up for eating only half a dinner, I do admire how well it worked. It might actually get me through till bedtime on other days.

I normally eat a fruit in the morning, then a full lunch, dinner, and light supper, because I'm a late-to-bed-late-to-rise person. But today, not having had a supper last night, I tried eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner today (without a late-night meal). I think it might have worked had it not been for the failed dinner.

I am feeling the "no sweets" more today, on day 2. At the mall, I passed up Nestle Toll House Cookies and Cinnabon and La Madeleine and Starbucks. That ain't easy, folks!
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

Kittson
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Post by Kittson » Wed Mar 30, 2016 1:26 pm

Hi! I read your post on the Unbelievable Hunger thread in the General Discussion. I think you did the right thing. White knuckling brings back those disordered food thoughts for me. I don't know if you have a past with that, but often it's better to virtual plate as you did and call it good, especially if you under-ate at your meal.

Great job making No S work for you, not against you!

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Wed Mar 30, 2016 2:52 pm

Thank you, Kittson! I really appreciate it! :D

I have that history of strict dieting -> bingeing -> strict dieting -> etc. And I figured if I forced myself to be hungry and miserable, it would be just like being on one of those very restrictive diets and probably lead to bingeing later. I'm glad to hear some reassurance that I did the right thing! :)
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Thu Mar 31, 2016 10:07 pm

Urgh... I'm getting pretty blue about the no sweets thing. No sweets most days for the rest of my life??!! Suddenly, it doesn't sound doable! Or desirable! I have used sugar and (especially) chocolate to boost my mood on a daily basis almost my entire life.

Does dark chocolate have to count as a sweet?! I could maybe survive if I got my 2 small squares of dark chocolate once a day...

(That said, I'm succeeding so far. I allowed myself most of a piece of whole-wheat toast before bed last night without calling it a failure. I've eaten a late-night supper my entire life, so I'm easing off that somewhat gently.)
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Sat Apr 02, 2016 2:29 am

With the encouragement I got from my other post, I'm now having a tiny smidge of dark chocolate as a daily reward (delayed gratification is so not my thing...).

Tonight I shifted mealtimes, too. 9 or 10 a.m., 2:30 p.m., 9 p.m. Hoping I can go to bed still not quite hungry.

I even cooked something excellent today for dinner. Irish potato and leek soup with nine-grain bread with Irish butter. With some moscato. Color me happy!
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Sat Apr 02, 2016 1:21 pm

Whoosh! Lost 3-4 pounds overnight. I read from Jen1974's blog (or maybe some other articles I read after her blog post on the topic) that a fast drop like that can be caused by alcohol or a big dose of carbs, and I had both at dinner last night.

I also had a late enough dinner that I went to bed just as I was starting to get hungry, so I didn't feel nearly as deprived!

Now to avoid putting it back on during the weekend! I have plans for a piece of chocolate cake at La Madeleine and a hot chocolate from Starbucks and some of the leftover Easter candy I haven't touched. Hopefully that won't be enough to undo it all.
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Mon Apr 04, 2016 2:04 pm

Okay, my S weekend... I had a doughnut, a few bites of chocolate cake, and a sampling of Easter candy. I also permasnacked from 4-9 Saturday and generally overate a bit.

I regained 1 pound, maybe 2, of the 3-4 pounds I'd lost. It's sorta scary how easy it is to regain weight. But at least I didn't regain it all, which I had feared! If it's 2 steps forward, 1 step back, I'll eventually get there.

What I learned:

Permasnacking, as I did on Saturday, sucks. The reason permasnackers are always hungry is that they never eat enough at one time to feel satisfied! I don't have any interest in permasnacking anymore. Sunday, I ate real meals again.

Most of the Easter candy and the chocolate cake were unimpressive. The doughnut was pretty good.

It really is hard to judge how much you're eating when you're permasnacking! It doesn't FEEL like much because you never get full!

I've also forgone my evening snack for... three days in a row? I've eaten a large dinner at 9pm, so I haven't gotten hungry before bed. But I've also slept poorly. I've read that people who eat a small snack of carbohydrates before bed sleep better. I hope I will adapt to this as well, otherwise, I'll add in a few bites of something before bed for the sake of my sleep.

So far, on no-S, I'm really surprised at:

- how minor the changes seem at some times and how massive they seem at other times...
- that you can get substantial results while eating WHATEVER YOU WANT (just not WHENEVER you want)...
- that it's much faster and easier to retrain the appetite than I'd imagined...
- how satisfying this way of eating is once you actually start eating for pleasure again!
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Fri Apr 08, 2016 4:17 am

My week has gone well so far! I'm sticking to the spirit and the letter reasonably well and feeling OK about it. The main thing is that I'm feeling very impatient. I want to see the scale move! Ya know, daily!!! Which of course is unreasonable and unsustainable, sigh. But I keep thinking about trying out some mods for faster results.... and I'm only on Week 2!

I was reading a great article the other day about how people who are goal oriented will inevitably lose all interest in whatever they were doing the moment they attain the goal. That's part of why people who aim to lose a certain amount of weight regain it afterward. They met their goal and psychologically they're DONE. It was an article about martial arts and how most people who get their black belts quit the art within months or even weeks of attaining that goal. They're completely gung ho for YEARS and then... poof. The goal motivated them and now the goal is gone.

They emphasized how you have to focus on process, not results, for results that you want to last. Same thing Reinhardt says, of course, but another perspective on it.

So, I need to stop looking at the scale, don't I? Stop thinking about the goal. The goal is the habit. *sigh* It's just not as exciting or motivating, is it?

I'm going to change my signature based on this...
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

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anra
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Post by anra » Fri Apr 08, 2016 8:00 am

hi, i like how you formulated your goal in the signature. sounds really long-term.

and as somebody who is very impatient, i struggle with not seeing immediate results too!

that is why keeping a journal is a very valuable tool. one just can't remember forever exactly how the "here and now" feels .. but if we write it down, stick with the programme and revisit the journal maybe sometime later, we'll be able to see the progress (hopefully!).

hope you find a way to figure out your best setting for dinner/snacks at night!
simplicity is the purest form of elegance.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Fri Apr 08, 2016 4:05 pm

Thank you, Anra! That's a good point... :-)
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2016 6:00 am

Post by hhenders » Fri Apr 08, 2016 4:11 pm

Oh, very exciting development last night -

I ate dinner early at 7:30 due to an evening obligation, then didn't go to bed till 11:30. I would normally have been STARVING and had to eat a sizeable "supper." I did feel some little tummy grumbles and nearly ate a panicked snack, but I just had my cup of milk and was able to go to bed! Yay! I may have broken the habit now!

Still not sleeping great... I don't sleep as heavily... have a much more active mind with such active dreams that I hardly feel like I'm even asleep... but I'll stick with it a while longer before adding a (tiny) bedtime snack.
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

JJJPK
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Post by JJJPK » Tue Apr 19, 2016 11:34 pm

hhenders, I feel you about evening snacks! That is the absolute hardest time for me too! Especially because I eat at 4:00p.m. and then don't usually go to bed until 10:00p.m. or so. By that time the hunger is insane. But I have a few tips (if you want them that is!)

-Try to go to bed a little earlier(?) If that's possible of course! I know there are those night you just need to unwind and that might be totally unpractical for you
-Do something REALLY engaging in the evenings. If you enjoy reading, try that. Also, something I've learned is that burning a scented candle can help with hunger. We are sensory people. If taste isn't in high gear, then engage smell! Maybe just avoid food scented ones!
-Try tea before bed. It's actually pretty filling for like half an hour, because it's warm. It'll relax you and maybe it can help with some of those zany dreams!
-Another thing to try, heavy duty exercise. I don't know what you do or how much, but exercising will make you really, really tired. I have also found that an evening class I take on Wednesdays (body bar) is really great. I'm so exhausted I fall right asleep.
-This one is really out there, but if you're a real night owl, you could try staying up till midnight, eating breakfast and then not eating again till lunch. I know it seems crazy, but I've found it usually takes my stomach about two hours to "wake up" in the morning. I don't know what Reinhard would think about that one! lol :lol:

That's all. I'm a newbie, but those are a few things I've found sorta work. Take what you like, leave the rest :D
Na Razie!
JJJPK

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Wed Apr 20, 2016 3:30 am

Thank you, JJ, I really appreciate it! Those are some great creative ideas! :-) Reading is a great idea because when I'm engaged in a book, I will forget to eat for hours!
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2016 6:00 am

Post by hhenders » Wed Apr 20, 2016 4:24 am

General update:

I'm now in Week 4 and pretty unhappy with the lack of results.

Now, on the up side (and it is a significant up side) I have not gained any weight. Knowing that I can eat WHATEVER I want (just not whenever I want) and stay at a steady weight is actually very reassuring.

However, I'm still 15-20 pounds heavier than I want to be and that's not changing.

I do feel that I'm doing vanilla No-S very well. I have it strongly internalized already. I am sometimes having a very small snack before bed only if dinner was too small. I'm having 2 small squares of dark chocolate a day and I can't imagine that causing the failure to lose weight. (It's about 1/8 of a serving.) I also can't live without it, so.... ;-)

Also, I have noted the thread that talks about the people who get the best/fastest results - and those who don't. I fit the latter profile - a petite almost-middle-aged female with not that much weight to lose.

So I'm feeling like vanilla No-S is going to be my maintenance plan, but it can't be my weight-loss plan.

Now, I have realized that I have been eating a TON of fast food and pizza and TV dinners in the past few months. In fact, I rarely if ever eat a home-cooked meal. I guess that could be part of my problem. Even if you eat sensible portions, pizza and chicken nuggets and french fries are just not weight-loss foods when eaten constantly.

To provide some context here, I have always been off-and-on some sort of extreme diet, and it's "worked" in that I've been at an OK weight my whole life. Up until the constant struggle and misery reached some sort of psychological tipping point around the new year and I simply couldn't bear it anymore. I then put on 20 pounds in a few short months by trying out "intuitive eating" (what a mistake that was!). I quickly fell into some truly awful eating habits (as you can see from the paragraph above). No-S has been my attempt to get things into some sort of balance I can live with for the rest of my life.

So, first off, I'm undoing my new terrible habits in part by changing my schedule so I'll be at home for pretty much every meal, with plenty of time to cook dinner at night. So, real food, here I come.

I think, though, that it might take more than that for me to get results. And I have a public performance in three weeks and I really don't want to get up there looking the way I do right now. Although I know there's probably not much I can do about that in three weeks!

Anyway, I'm going to go ahead and diet more aggressively for these three weeks to see if I can lose at least a few pounds. I am a little nervous about being able to do it effectively - that is, stay strict enough to lose weight and then NOT yo-yo back afterward. So I'm going to do it strictly within the No-S framework the whole way.

Here's my plan.

For these three weeks, I'll resume my previous no-refined-foods diet (which kept my weight perfect as long as I could stand to do it) for breakfast and lunch. I'll eat what I want for dinner (including my reward chocolate) but I'll try to make sure it's home-cooked food. I'll continue to follow every other No-S rule, including weekends off. I am pretty sure this will cause weight loss.

After the three weeks is up, if I'm unhappy eating this way but I'm losing weight quickly, I'll allow more flexibility at either breakfast or lunch (not both) as well as eating what I want at dinner. I'll still continue all the other No-S rules.

Three weeks after that, I'll reevaluate and tweak some more if needed.

That's my plan... we'll see how it goes. Today was Day 1 of this plan and it was pretty awful. The no-refined-foods diet always makes me feel sick (and starving) for the first few days as my body adjusts. Headache, hunger, and general misery. But it should get better in a day or two.

TL;DR - Not losing weight. New mod: No-S plus no refined foods at breakfast or lunch for 3 weeks, then tweak as needed. Today sucked.
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

hhenders
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Post by hhenders » Fri May 13, 2016 9:19 pm

All right, so I lost maybe a pound or two from trying my No-S plus no-refined-foods-for-breakfast-and-lunch mod... and it came back on at the weekend. So I tried going full-on no-refined-foods for the remaining ten days before my performance, and that failed within a few hours (ha!). I just hate dieting that strictly. So I made it to my performance at the same weight I was at before. At least I didn't gain any, right?

This week, I started trying a 50% rule. No S plus half my plate should be fruits and veggies, if I'm eating at home. But I started feeling restricted and deprived and unhappy within a few days. And then breaking the No-S rules.

I feel so frustrated. So, so frustrated. I don't know what to do for weight loss that won't just make me miserable. :-(
I'm not targeting a goal weight or size, since that's counterproductive. I just want to eat sanely and look slender always! 4 weeks of very consistent No-S led to no weight loss. Not sure what to do now.

Jen1974
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Post by Jen1974 » Fri May 13, 2016 10:00 pm

I try to make all of my meals something that I really love so it gives me something to look forward to, but that's still easy to make & I don't go out or pick up (bagel pizzas & egg sandwiches are my go to when I don't have much time). I also make sure to add fat to all my meals which makes all the difference in the world for not getting hungry between meals & feeling deprived. I can't stand dieting anymore either so I'm accepting that I might lose more slowly, but am much happier eating foods I love & not feeling deprived at all. That's always what leads me to overeat on weekends & get nowhere.

RAWCOOKIE
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Post by RAWCOOKIE » Sat May 14, 2016 8:06 am

Jen1974 wrote:I try to make all of my meals something that I really love so it gives me something to look forward to, but that's still easy to make & I don't go out or pick up (bagel pizzas & egg sandwiches are my go to when I don't have much time). I also make sure to add fat to all my meals which makes all the difference in the world for not getting hungry between meals & feeling deprived. I can't stand dieting anymore either so I'm accepting that I might lose more slowly, but am much happier eating foods I love & not feeling deprived at all. That's always what leads me to overeat on weekends & get nowhere.
I agree with that. As Reinhard says, it's first about building the habit, and not worrying so much about how much is on the plate. My plates are now more moderate - but that's happened naturally, not forced. Keep going!
I love Everyday Systems :3

13.6.15 124.25lbs
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jackn
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Post by jackn » Sat May 14, 2016 2:04 pm

RAWCOOKIE wrote:
Jen1974 wrote:I try to make all of my meals something that I really love so it gives me something to look forward to, but that's still easy to make & I don't go out or pick up (bagel pizzas & egg sandwiches are my go to when I don't have much time). I also make sure to add fat to all my meals which makes all the difference in the world for not getting hungry between meals & feeling deprived. I can't stand dieting anymore either so I'm accepting that I might lose more slowly, but am much happier eating foods I love & not feeling deprived at all. That's always what leads me to overeat on weekends & get nowhere.
Second that, too...
Fat...
hhenders wrote: What I learned:
Permasnacking, as I did on Saturday, sucks. The reason permasnackers are always hungry is that they never eat enough at one time to feel satisfied! I don't have any interest in permasnacking anymore. Sunday, I ate real meals again.

Most of the Easter candy and the chocolate cake were unimpressive. The doughnut was pretty good.

It really is hard to judge how much you're eating when you're permasnacking! It doesn't FEEL like much because you never get full!


So far, on no-S, I'm really surprised at... how satisfying this way of eating is once you actually start eating for pleasure again!
Sounds excellent to me.
So, OK, not yet on the scale, but plenty of progress there, hhenders...

Good luck to us all.
At meals only eat.
Only eat at meals.

Jen1974
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Post by Jen1974 » Sat May 14, 2016 4:45 pm

hhenders wrote: What I learned:
Permasnacking, as I did on Saturday, sucks. The reason permasnackers are always hungry is that they never eat enough at one time to feel satisfied! I don't have any interest in permasnacking anymore. Sunday, I ate real meals again.

Most of the Easter candy and the chocolate cake were unimpressive. The doughnut was pretty good.

It really is hard to judge how much you're eating when you're permasnacking! It doesn't FEEL like much because you never get full!


So far, on no-S, I'm really surprised at... how satisfying this way of eating is once you actually start eating for pleasure again!
This is so true!! Love this (:

babybird
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Post by babybird » Wed Dec 21, 2016 12:37 am

Hi. Just wondering how you are getting on Hhenders. Did you csee minute with the plan?
Recovering from binge eating disorder

Aiming for 21 days vanilla no s

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