Everyday Systems

Tomorrow will be day 1. Last week I did the Metabolic Typing diet online (for forty bucks) and got a list with about tweny foods I could eat and a thousand I could not eat. My doctor has told me to avoid grains because of my arthiritis, but he admits it's hard to do, so he said to add EFA capsules when I do, to keep the fatty acids balanced. I"ve been researching and driving myself crazy worrying about acid/alkaline, fast or slow oxidative and which supplements are optimal. The MT diet says mostly protein, but it makes me very aggressive, to the point of not being lady-like. That doesn't work down here. Anyway, I don't really love meat. I feel like life is too short to eat food you don't like. That's why I'm excited about this. I can enjoy what I enjoy. I'm a little anxious about the weekends. I like to eat a lot of one thing (for example a four quart pot full of popcorn). I might justify that as a meal and spend all week losing the weight I gained over the weekend.

Welcome, Margaret!

I've been on since June 5 and things have worked out really well so far. I added a few twists of my own to the No-S rules because I had reformed my eating habits quite a bit already.

I agree, there are a million and one different combinations of "special diets" that the hucksters are ready to sell us. But the docs and nutritionists appear to agree there's only one way to lose weight: exercise more; eat fewer calories. Less in, more out.

I tend to feel all the other noise is window dressing and marketing. Every diet being sold has to differentiate itself from the crowd somehow to increase its market share. So they emphasize all kinds of complicated formulas and foods.

When what we all really need to do is stop eating junk food and pigging out on regular food, and start moving around more.

Ah, I know that predicament.

My house is still stocked with junk food for my teen daughter. It's not always easy to walk by it, but I've managed. It truly does get to be a habit right around week three.

Stick with it: you can do it.

Welcome, Margaret. You will make up for in savings on the no s diet what you spent on the "metabolic diet" and others pretty quickly. Buying less food means thinner you and fatter wallet. What a novel concept!

As for the weekends, two pieces of advice:

1) Don't worry so much about them. Enjoy them. If you eat a little too much some weekends, so what. What you do most of the time during during the week is more important in itself and will build habits that carry over. If you worry too much about weekends and don't give yourself that necessary reward and safety valve, you won't be able to make it through the week. All restricting weekends accomplishes is that it makes it hard enough that you have an excuse to fail. Don't set yourself up like that.

2) What you can do regarding weekends is plan your reward. Get something especially nice, don't just start eating randomly. Instead of a gallon of popcorn, get a smaller amount, and splurge on extra premium quality. You will enjoy more and eat less. It's kind of counterintuitive, but extra reward is actually ultimately more effective than extra restrictions.

Hey there Miss Margaret, welcome!
Yeah, bossy bitchy aggressive broads are not a big hit once you go down below that Mason Dixon line! I lived in New Orleans for two years, and being from NY, people sure noticed that I had an aggressive streak, fairly non-existant in most lady folk down there! LOL....
Eating meat definitely contributes to aggression and anger... I believe it's the neurotransmitter in most meat, dopamine...Too much of that can bring out the killer in all of us!
It's definitely important to have a balance.
You will still be able to make nutritious choices here and don't fear the "D" word on this forum... If you look at Reinhards brilliant tome, you may find the little part where he mentions that word, but it's in the context like "The African Giraffe has an herbiverous diet"....
Here, diet isn't something you do to punish yourself, and it's not a crazy fad doomed to fail... It does take initiative and perseverence though, so stick with it! There's no reason you can't alkalize yourself while also doing NoS! LOL.... This is about behaviour and habits, not about billions of food restrictions.... YOU make those calls... It's really very liberating!
Good luck Southern Belle! Stay away from those biscuits and gravy! LOL....
Peace and Love,
Deb

Halfway through day one...posts from my four supports are uplifting. Thank you all so much. So far, so good - I didn't really get a real breakfast, just a hunk of cheese to get out the door, and almost caved at 11:00, but remembered I could eat a good lunch soon... which I did - so I didn't need to stop at the convenience store for a snack to tide me over till I got back from town. ( I am not an urban ranger, more of a fluffy wood nymph). Once again, I really appreciate the encouragement. My special thinks to Reinhard, I stayed up till midnite last nite reading all the sites, following links to my amusement, and laughing out loud. Remember that lady on the infomercials who had the weight loss plan where she taught you how to breath correctly. (Even I didn't buy that one.) Maybe our leader is also increasing our weight loss through laughing, with his witty prose.

Day 1 Success
That said, I'll go to bed. Thank you for your support. Have a nice weekend.

Day 2 some success

I guess, it's hard to guage success on an S day. Did observe some self-monitoring, not mindless eating. Had the popcorn for a meal. Other meals have been rather nutrious lately, so I felt justified. A little snacking, but more importantly, at several opportunities, I didn't.

Hi Margaret,

I sympathize with your empty nester status. We have two kids, and I homeschooled them both from preschool through high school graduation. Our son is 20 years old now, married, and living in another town. Our daughter is 15 (she will graduate next May). Her schedule is so busy we don't seem to see her much these days. Very often, it is just my husband and I for meals, and it is a strange thing! When I look around and see families with small kids, I feel a twinge of envy, because they are just getting started and I am almost done...My happiest days, I think, were those with the dinner table full with the children and their friends, boys wrestling in the living room, and girls doing girl-stuff at the dining room table. Now, everything is very quiet around here. So...I know what you are going through.

Don't let it get you down though. You need to find a new identity, as someone who is now free to serve a larger community, whether Church or civic, and learn to relate to your grown kids as adults. I am discovering a great delight in the new conversations we are having! And, there are lots of cookbooks out there with titles like "Cooking for One or Two" which might make for some fun meals with you and your low-maintenance hubby.

God bless,
Jan

Day 3 some success

Harder than not stuffing, is the concept of it's OK to be normal on weekends. It's been decades of either dieting or not dieting.

Having to really work on trusting myself. Bad memories from when I tried the Fat is a Feminist Issue Diet which had explicit instructions to eat whatever you want, no restrictions, and your body/appetite, etc. will adjust and weight will normalize. Three weeks and 12 additional pounds later I decided I better stop before my clothes were TWO sizes too small.

Day 4 Unsuccessful

alas, was so pleased at my idea of substituting my meal for a snack I decided to do it Monday, too. It snowballed. Started eating easily accessible junk for energy. Lesson learned regular nutritious meals increase a sense of well being and curtail snacking. Today is B1.

Day B1 Failure

Hi Margaret.

I don't think that you've failed. If you said that you've been either "on" or "off" a diet for many years then the fact that you ate normally for a few days is a blessing.

I am struggling with the fact that I've been doing this for 16 days and I haven't lost 10 pounds. I've been so "good". Why hasn't the weight just melted off? Well, probably because of years of tampering with my metabolism, but I keep telling myself that Rome wasn't built in a day. Besides, I'm not 20 anymore so I can't just run around the block and see the difference.

I think that this "moderate" way of eating may take longer but probably will stick. You just have to get right back on that horse and try again. Don't think of it as success or failure. Think of each day as one step further from the slavery of dieting. Write down what you eat. I have a little notebook just to keep track. Put a star on your calendar. When you start to see more stars then blanks then you will know you're on your way.

One final thought, and I've been pondering this for a few weeks: do you remember what you ate as a child? I'm not talking about the ice cream from the ice cream man's truck, but just your every day food? I don't. I can't even remember what I ate in jr. high. I think the reason that I can't remember is because I was at a normal weight and never gave it a thought. I was just a growing person. Strange how we put so much energy into our weight when we could just be living our lives...

Good luck,
Dru

Keep going, or start over, however you want to look at it.

I weighed more this morning than I did a few days ago. It's not encouraging. But I have a simple plan I can stick to. If I keep this up for a year, will I weigh less? That's probably a better frame of reference, because this isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle. Is a pound a week enough? That's 52 in a year... did I gain 52 in a year? Heck no! It took me 10 years to gain 35 pounds.

If I keep this promise to myself everyday, will it improve other areas of my life? Will I feel better about myself? Will I be more disciplined about exercise, and all the other things that I know I should do? I think so.

So, start over, or keep going.

Margaret, don't despair. It takes most people a few tries. More than a few, actually: the pseudo statistic I read somewhere on changing dietary habits is "12 times".

Remember the Winston Churchill quote: "Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm."

So let's see some more enthusiastic reds, if green won't come just yet.

Today is C1. I am not giving up... even though I had some unsuccessful days, my weight is the same. I'm a scale slave. R. and the others have given me the support to attempt again. I wanted to be free from planning, but see I need to. I have planned out my three meals for the day and will check in tonight. Mucho gracias.

C1 Success
I feel reinspired. I am not going to get on the computer when I get home. I've spent all day with you guys. I work late on Thursdays. I'll just go home, relax, read, watch tv, take a long bath. I've had my three squares, so I'm done. Thanks for support and the little shove to return.

Yay Margaret!!!!!!!!!!
Never give up!
Never!!!!
That is not an option...
I thought I posted to you, the other day, and it seems like my post may have somehow disappeared? That's weird...but sorry you felt bummed out for a little while there... You just have to be very patient and loving to yourself, and just stick with it! Patience!
Congratulations on your day!
Love,
Deb

C2 Success

Very challenging day, felt myself waver, but I held on. Even the hour I sat in the Saturn Dealership while my car was getting done and the popcorn machine was right there. I almost didn't go to get my oil changed because of that. But I need to be normal.
Dinner was strange, but all on one plate.

C3 Sday
C4 Sday

Nothing lost, nothing gained (on the scales). Increasing awareness of marathon style eating preferences over plate method. Aware of standing in front of frig eating on Sdays. Aware of how I like to fix something, eat it, then fix something, eat it, etc. Deep desire to be free from "food issues".
Last year I made a conscious effort to reduce my heavy social drinking to one or two drinks occassionally and develop a "take it or leave it" attitude toward drinking. It required will power at first, and sometimes I felt deprived and I had a couple of slip-ups (specifically four over about a year period - all Sdays, as we say) but overall I am even beyond being in control because it's something I no longer have to control, it's just a habit...I guess in this case a non-habit. I know if I go out or if my husband picked up some beer for the weekend, I might have a drink or even two, but if there's nothing around I don't even think about it. I really want to be in that same mindset w/food. Of course, it's harder because, for me, it's almost easier to not eat than to eat in moderation. But, as I know not-eating makes me eat more later, I must learn to do it in moderation. This support group is helping me. Thank you, R.

C5 Success

Only ate three times, did nibble my Wendy's french fries in the car on a quick supper break, but time was an issue. my,how we justify. Good thing was, didn't feel I had an option to eat when I got home late last night.

Good going Margaret!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I really feel that when we've had years and years of unhealthy patterns of eating, there will always be those "Sses" which are harder than others...
It seems that your post before, about Social Drinking and Standing eating, in front of the fridge, are two of yours...
They also start with S, so maybe you can mentally work on curbing those too, even though they are not strict S'sse... they are counterproductive... Once you are aware, that is the first step in being able to change...
I have coffee every morning, and I like to sweeten it up a lot...
For years I had been using aspartame, and then switched to sucralose
(nutrasweet and splenda)... and due to the fact that they totally messed with my perception of sweetness, when I switched to using unrefined sugar (turbinado) I found I was putting 4 teaspoons into each cup, to match the sweetness my tastebuds got acclimated to...
Wowsa!!! Also I put a teaspoon of dry hot chocolate powder in too, so that I could enjoy a little chocolate every day....
Well, I knew this was a bad habit which had to change, but it took a long time to develop, so it took an equally long time for me to finally cut down on that sugar habit. But one day I just decided and said to myself "before Equal I was satisfied with 2 tsps of sugar, why not now too? Todays the day to cut down..." It went very smoothly, and I was previously convinced that I'd never be able to cut down.... I now use two teaspoons of turbinado and one of hotchoc mix... I might be able to whittle this down to one and one pretty soon, because, in some bizzarre twist of fate, I think being a Nosser for some time now, I have been actually disliking things which are overly sweet more and more, so let's see... Maybe that will be my July monthly resolution!
Well gotta split for work! Take it easy and tackle your habits one at a time... You can try for all three, but if it takes a little longer for some to go away, don't get discouraged... those are the really ingrained ones...
But you can change them, if you want to!
Love and Peace,
Deb

C6 Success
Whew!

C7 Success

You have a string of successful S-days...keep up the good work!!!

Keep it up margaret. Very nice comeback! Round C is looking great. I had a social drinking problem, too. Giving my self a daily "glass ceiling" of at most 2 drinks in a day worked astonishingly well.

C8 Success sort of

I am proceeding w/thought instead of simply proceeding with my eating...did have a very snacky type early dinner-not all on one plate but eaten in one sitting could be classified as a meal. Getting acknowledgement from the man (R.) should give me the resolve to get to bed w/out blowing it. I appreciate the enocuragement from the others, too. Deb, reading about you is getting more interesting than All My Children. Going to Jacksonville to see my son this weekend, but planning not to use feeding him as an excuse to eat outside of mealtimes.

Thanks Margaret! LOL!!!
I guess it does sound pretty dramatic eh? LOL... All my *neurotic* children, would be appropriate here...
Have fun in Jacksonville... Remember, it's both the weekend and it's almost fourth of July, so enjoy your S's...

It takes time and patience to develop confidence in yourself...
We are all here for you though..
You won't "blow it"...
And if so,,,,
Start again...
Love,
Deb

C9, C10, C11, C12 Dismal failure
aagh...Frito-Lay stock went up this weekend....this could have in no way counted as reasonable snacking - feel puffy and stressed...can't count visits to Jacksonville as Sdays because I do them pretty regularly and if I excuse them as Ses, they will offset any progress. I've eaten well and then eaten poorly and berated myself so many times in the past and here I am doing it again....I don't sleep well when I overeat and I feel bloated. Oh, well maybe this time. Today is D1.

Margaret, I'm sorry to hear it. Good form jumping right back to attempt D. Remember how many tries it takes on average to reform a dietary habit (12), remember the Churchill quote. You had a good run with attempt C. Give yourself a mini goal of breaking 8 days with D. Learn from what messed you up the last times. And if there is another "dismal failure," try to limit it to one day, not 4. Don't despair, it won't always be this hard. You are fighting bad habits now, but building good ones that will be a positive help. That enemy, habit, will soon be your friend, and as you know from bitter experience, a very powerful one.

Hey Margaret.

My personal "ceiling" that I had to get through was 2 weeks. Now I feel weird if I eat out of the No S guidelines.

Even thought I haven't lost too much weight I still feel much better internally. I am waiting for the external to catch up with the mind. I know what you mean about having a fitful sleep after overeating. Just remember how good it feels to wake up light after a good No S day.

Cheers,
Dru

Hi Margaret!!!
Let's see... Hmmm,,,,
Four good days, and one dismal day?... That doesn't sound too terrible to me....
Focus on those good days!
Keep on truckin babe, and stop berating yourself...
When you hear that mean inner voice tell it to shut the fonk up!!!
Seriously.....
You wouldn't allow your children to talk to their friends in this manner, nor to you, so why allow yourself to do it to yourself... (great English eh? LOL...)

Find some helpful Mantras which actually make you feel good and congratulate yourself for continuing on trying!!!!
Check out Vanilla Gorilla's signature quote... it's good...
Love and Peace,
Deb

Deb, It was four dismal days. I'm on it and doing the Mexican Resturant test tonight.

D1 Success

Whew!

Go Margaret!
Your tenacity is really amazing. Even though you may have 'fallen off the path', you just keep getting back on. Good for you.

Ditto!!!! Keep on going Margaret!!!!
Be here now, and don't dwell on what has happened...
How painfully depressing would it be if all of us tallied up the days we might consider "dismal failures" in our lives...
The truth is, they are just part of your total journey.... Keep moving and don't give up!
Glad to hear of your successful day! Don't get psyched out.... It really is not the same for everyone, and as long as you stick with it, it will work out fine... Be patient and, like Sibyl said, "tenacious"!
Have a great evening friend!
Peace and Love,
Deb

"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat." --Theodore Roosevelt

Hi Margaret! Hang in there, baby! Congrats on your restart with series "D"! I love the nomenclature you're using.

I had some setbacks this week and last, so I am glad (in a sense) to hear of your challenges ... they make me feel like I'm not alone, and we can keep trying together!

That thing about the average of 12 re-tries to re-set a habit must be true ... They say the people who are still keeping their New Year's resolutions in July are the ones that started trying again repeatedly after setbacks, instead of just throwing in the towel.

PS. Oh, how I love Fritos! They are SO hard to resist.

D2 failure
I failed the Mexican Restuarant test. Was doing OK till my friend ordered the Fried Ice Cream (p.s. don't try to make this at home)

D3 Failure

Hope springs eternal. Tomorrow is E1.

Margaret!
Hey! If all that threw you was that fried ice cream, maybe you and your "friend" should just save Mexican restaurants for S days...
Why make it that much harder on yourself????
If you feel like it's going to be such a test of your will, why make it a test at all... Make it free and legal and guiltless....
I wish you the very best, and we know you will do well!
Keep the faith!
Love,
Deb