Everyday Systems

181.4

yesterday was incredibly stressful all around. I had a dr. appointment. He went over my blood work. Everything looked ok. Cholesterol is a little high. which is to be expected. I still have 30-40 pounds to lose and have been eating not so healthy foods lately (fast food, etc.) Sugar is good. so...as always I know what to do, it is just a matter of doing it: walking, resistance exercise, eat whole foods, avoid junk. I am taking cough syrup because I have a bad cough

181.7. I've had the flu so I haven't been walking and I'm eating too much junk

Hope it's okay to say this. I know I can't change my past, but a part of me wishes I had been able to get on board more in my 40's at least in terms of eating better quality food, if not a lot less. Turns out that many of the conditions in the brain that lead to the development of dementia in later years start from the lifestyle decades earlier. I know that's true of cardiovascular disease and diabetes, but those never scared me; I knew that my blood work was all amazingly good, even when I was at my heaviest. But dementia doesn't have any precursors. 'Course, I don't know if knowing that back then would have made a dent in my milk chocolate consumption... It isn't as if I thought it was good for me. I guess I thought I could always turn things around, if I needed to.

I don't know why it has taken me so many years to get that when I'm sick, I don't need to eat much and certainly not the things I do. They aren't even what my mother would have fed me, so I can't blame it on her.

I agree with you oolala. my mind knows what is right, but I don't always do it. It is a struggle. And I am a stress eater. All within my control and all up to me. No one will motivate me but me.

Hi! After seeing your testimonial I came over here to check out your thread. I'm so glad I did! It's awesome to see that even with lots of ups and downs, the weight will eventually come off if I'm consistent and persevere. Way to go! Ooh la la, you have given me new incentive to be mindful of what I put in my body....my grandfather died of Alzheimer's. I definitely don't want to go down that path.

180. point something. My body seems to like this weight. But I know I have to go down more. one day at a time

didn't weigh myself this morning. needed a break. I have been fighting a lingering cold/flu thing. worst cough ever for 9 days now. hard to sleep with that cough and running a low grade fever 99.5 for days now. doctor said it just needs to run its course. I am trying to increase water intake to flush my system. My goal for today is to eat whole foods, make a nutria bullet after work. I think I need the nutrients to get better. I haven't been walking because of this cough/fever. Maybe a walk around the block

Sorry to hear you're sick! Get well soon!

179.7

this cold/cough will be a lingering one. I am already on day 10. My mom had it for 2-3 weeks. The cough is the worst because it is difficult to sleep. I haven't been walking. surprised by the number on the scale considering that yesterday contained no activity. I started out eating healthy, then things went down hill in the evening. Evening time seems to be my most difficult time. I know everyone says eat breakfast it's important. But sometimes I'm not hungry at all in the morning. But then I pay for it in the evening. I start eating everything in sight.

Just to remind myself and motivate myself

April 27, 2008 268.5 pounds
April 20, 2016 179.7 pounds

8 years, 88.8 pounds down

I can do this

still fighting the flu from hell. It is taking forever to go away. I really want it to go away so I can start walking again

I know there is a correlation between not eating breakfast and night eating, but I've found that, too, is just a habit, meaning the link is very breakable, especially when I am sure to eat enjoyable lunches and dinners and really savor them. AND now that I"m convinced that the overnight fast has such strong advantages. I've been extending my nighttime fast through breakfast time (usually having a "loaded" coffee at the 10:20 am break at work) a couple of days a week for a couple of months now, and it has evened out, meaning at first I did a bit of overeating at dinner or the next day a few times, but less and less. Reminding myself very firmly that I DON'T want to keep reinforcing the night habit since it really interferes with the benefits I want from keeping that night fast has really helped.

But honestly, if my meal habit hadn't been pretty firmly in place, I don't think I would have experimented with fasting between meals longer.

And if I hadn't become really convinced it gave me something I probably couldn't get any other way, or any way I was willing to do or pay for.

Just out of curiosity, why do you think you have to lose more? Do you think you are still overeating regularly enough to interfere with the health benefits you've already gotten having lost more than 10% of your weight?

Medically my BMI is right on the border of overweight and obese

I'm five foot five, which means that at the highest I should weigh 145-150 pounds. I weigh 180. So technically I have to lose about 30 pounds. I think my blood pressure would benefit from it. But I'd be happy losing 10 more pounds. My focus is health. I would love to not take blood pressure meds and lower my cholesterol - at this point looking thin is not a priority. being healthy is

My start BMI was 44.5
now my BMI is 30

anything over 30 at my health is obese, so I am right on the border

180.8

even though I am going on week 3 of the longest most annoying cold, I am going to try to walk today

B = one hard boiled egg, toast with butter, not very hungry, over ate the last two days

joasia wrote:My start BMI was 44.5
now my BMI is 30

Amazing and encouraging.

Keep it up.

appetite vs. stress eating

so...I have no sense of taste or smell left because of this cold/flu I have been battling. So why am I stress eating????? Is it the texture of the food? the comfort of feeling full? I always thought it was the taste that was soothing and encouraged me to stress eat. but this illness has showed me otherwise.

Just old patterns of pairing the food with some other stimuli. The important thing is to recognize that it is part of the neural pattern that you would really like to suppress, no? It does not tell you about a real need, nor will you damage yourself by suffering through the intense feelings of anxiety for as long as they last, which may be a few minutes, until you can divert yourself, or a couple of hours, until an appropriate time to eat.

It is definitely convenient if the urges to stress eat didn't come, but they don't MAKE us eat. They make us WANT to eat. We can want to eat and still NOT eat. It's a very powerful strategy to outlast the neural blast. It does almost as much as being able to avoid triggering it, but it is so easy to trigger it that it is really worth continuing to keep putting the "waiting" experiences in the "bank."

It was hard for me to face that when I get sick, the old tea and toast I used to have was not the best thing for me. The fewer flour products I have at that time, the better. But I had to get over the hump first because I WANTED them. I was NEVER sorry I resisted eating them.

Hope you get well soon.

Sorry! The overeating could be from being so unsatisfied due to the no smell factor.

Hope you feel better soon!

Linda

181.4

178.9

I ate fast food yesterday, but not a lot of it. Trying to eat healthy today, maybe it will help me kick this cold/flu

B = 1 cup blueberries
1 banana and 1/4 cup macadamia nuts
green tea plain
a good start

180.4

176. something

B =all most all of a sausage, egg, potato, cheese, breakfast burrito, ketchup, coffee black, berry yogurt

not a good day eating wise. started out ok. then I chose to overeat

B = breakfast burrito, coffee, yogurt, ketchup

L= sandwich with ham and cheese, broccoli pasta, then ate ham and cheese while making the sandwich and 6 pieces of licorice after

I have no one to blame but me. I'm mad at me. I need to stop using stress at work and home as an excuse to find comfort in food. Yes, it would be nice if at least one of these areas of my life were decent, but overeating and gaining weight will only make me feel miserable in the long run even if it is a short term comfort

I often noticed that after a drop in weight, I would feel quite a surge in overeating urges. It didn't help to have old excuses ready.

Your insights are the kind that help me the most.

joasia wrote:then I chose to overeat

Yes, I choose to overeat - not '...happened to me', or '... took place'.

Yet,

joasia wrote:I have no one to blame but me. I'm mad at me.

strikes me as neither true nor helpful.

Aren't we surrounded by a food environment (products, advertising, availability) which bypasses our natural regulation?
Don't most people have some ill-adjusted way of coping with the stresses of our urban environment? I overeat. Others drink, take drugs, prescription or not... beat their wives, get depressed...
You name it.
Don't people typically try many times before they manage to beat an addiction?
Aren't we all hear trying, not giving up, sincerely and persistently?

And to get better, I need to find a way to be nice to myself, I feel - both in terms of food practices and in terms of managing my behaviour.

I'm not my best friend when I overeat.
Nor am I, however, when I berate myself.

What do you think, Joasia?

Hey, Joasia.
I already had misgivings when posting this last post above, and now, I worry even more.

Did I put my foot in it, coming on too strong and preachy?
Please feel free, if you don't mind, to give me a piece of your mind.

no not at all. I know everyone always says don't put yourself down etc. It isn't productive. and they are probably correct. I am usually hard on myself. It is what it is. Something I need to work on.

This morning 179.5

yesterday I lived it up and indulged. We celebrated cinco de mayo a day early. Had lots of delicious food. Now that my flu is dying down (longest running flu ever!!!!) I want to start walking again

Hey, Joasia, thank you kindly.

And here I was, thinking that I invented being hard on myself.

Walk on!

I've recently read a biography of Bernarr Macfadden, one of the fathers of America's exercise and health trend.
Among other things, walking daily was something he tirelessly advocated.

sometimes my body aches after I walk, maybe I need to take a joint supplement

joasia wrote: maybe I need to take a joint

I know the feeling.

180.6

I will take it! Not a good eating weekend, no exercise, still battling the longest running cold of all time. Going to try to walk today, exterminator coming, if he gets done early, then I will walk. I have had insomnia. If I start eating healthier and walking I am hoping it will help with the insomnia

because i overdid it this weekend, my breakfast this morning is light

B = green tea unsweetened, 1 ounce macadamia nuts, one banana, water

joasia wrote:because i overdid it this weekend, my breakfast this morning is light

Joasia, do you mean 'don't feel like eating much', or 'should lower intake to make up for weekend excess?

I over ate this weekend and that is probably why I wasn't very hungry this morning. but my appetite will be there by lunch, if the past is any indication of the future

I've been practicing putting off eating until later in the morning when I have that heavy feeling. It's working out okay, as long as I don't get caught up in thinking it's going to cause weight loss. It's just practical.

Hope you get to take advantage of the delicious weather soon.

183

B= slice of homemade banana bread, coffee black

L= two roast chicken drumbsticks, roast vegetables, 1/2 roast ear of corn, 1 cup of spaghetti with homemade marinara

D= tba

this is where I falter - evening time, it is when I want to overeat the most, especially if I ate well during the day. Even after all these years, and losing some of the weight I needed to, I still don't have a real grip on my eating. I still have anxiety, especially in the evening about how much to eat so that I will not gain, sigh

Yes, evenings can be hard.

Is it going on after the meal or what you have at dinner itself?

Try not to get down on yourself, unless you really find that it changes your eating behavior. One part of you believes that you will respond to that tactic, but if it worked, your eating wouldn't be an issue anymore, very likely. See if you can be more curious and objective about it. "I wonder if I could be less concerned about my evening meal? I wonder if less dense food and more freggies some nights would end up being pleasant enough, especially if I take my time?" Also, looking to bring other pleasure into your evenings might help but that can sometimes be harder than figuring out what to eat!

183

still struggling to get back on track

B= 1.85 oz. of homemade banana bread, green tea unsweetened from starbucks

L = probably frozen meal because at work, maybe green juice and fruit

D - tba

I'm really going to try to go for a walk today. It has been about 5 weeks i haven't walked because of this crazy cold/flu i've been battling. although i'm not 100% yet, I am better and no fever, so I think it is time to get back into it

Good luck with the walk.

Get well soon, joasia.

182.8

ok... new weird development of this cold/flu. I can't hear well out of one ear. on day 4 now. and it won't pop. probably will have to go to the doctor this weekend. I am so ready for this cold to be gone.

182.8

I maintained over the weekend. My goal is to walk today. food wise - I didn't eat healthy, but I stayed withing weight watchers points, so I'm trying that out, at least for awhile

-lean cuisine french bread pizza
-1/2 sugar donut and 3/4 of a frosted cake donut, milk
-1/2 ham and cheese croissant sandwich
-one fruit, vegetable green juice (have to counter activate the junk LOL)

goal: walk after work, no more junk, no alc.

I saw some pictures of my former bigger self. I looked swollen. I don't want to go back there ever again. that is my motivation

182.9

yesterday I walked 4 miles

today

breakfast burrito with potatoes, eggs, cheese, taco sauce, avocado
one baby belle cheese

going to walk tonight

183.5

I have been emotionally eating, roller coaster at work right now, it is no excuse, but that is what is happening

Sorry to hear, Joasia.
No excuse needed.
We're people.
Thanx for sharing.

When I think of what I put away because of work... I shudder.

Hope you get over that hump soon.

Good luck to all of us.

185.9-186.1

well several days of overeating and the scale doesn't lie. But I am determined to get back on track today. And I am determined to walk after work, no excuses.

B = 1 hard boiled egg, one toast, 1/2 tsp butter, green tea

L =tba
D=tba

177. Trying to stay under 180 even when life is nuts

Progress.

Sounds like you manage.

Good luck.

178

183.9

I will take it. I have been really stress eating and not walking

180.9

174.6 struggling but still fighting

My gosh! You're down six pounds from a month ago, at least as of the 11th. (I tend to ignore one-day weigh-ins, though. I weigh for a week or even ten days and then find the average.)

May I ask: do you think if you didn't exert a lot of effort often to stick to whatever your plan is that you would end up overeating and gaining weight back? When you keep talking about struggling, I can only think that means that you are fighting the urge to eat all the time, that you are constantly thinking you should be eating less. Do you think you are overeating all the time?

I'm on your side!

179.9

work has started again and I have been stress eating the last few days. the scale shows it. but today is a new day.

B= 1 hard boiled egg, one slice white bread with butter, some grapes

L = the same with some green juice

D = probably spaghetti, cucumber salad, chicken stew with vegetables, and maybe some fruit

going to try to walk after work. we will see. it's going to be over 100 degrees today

Please remember that if you did not overeat by multiples of 3500 calories, you did not gain all fat.

I did a fast (for other reasons) awhile back. I was about 8 lbs. down after it, but there was no way in the number of days I was on it that I had burned 28,000 calories. In less than a week of daily averages no more than normal, which is probably around 1500-1800 calories, I was right back where I started. That was hardly overeating. I expected it, so it didn't freak me out.

But I do know that weight or not weight, I do not like the feeling of stress eating. I feel for ya! Here's wishing you the strength to hold out or the compassion to be kind to yourself and try again.

I agree with you. I hate the feeling of stress eating. I feel bad about myself and it usually ends in crying.

184.1 this morning

this is to be expected after a week or more of stress binge eating. but today is a new day. the battle continues. the battle of fighting my impulses and excesses.

181.4

this heat is making it difficult to walk. I am usually a morning walker. but during the week, due to work, I have to walk after work. Considering it has been 100 or more everyday since the beginning of June, this is a challenge.

Wow, I wouldn't want to walk either. Hope it cools off soon.

I salute you for walking after the day of heat!

Try to remember how much you hate stress eating and the feelings that come later when you feel those urges. It's so worth it to hold out. Consider crying before hand, if the tension seems to build up Try not to dwell on disturbing thoughts but let the tears flow. It will probably release enough tension that the urge will seem less important.

Hang in there!

180.
Still struggling but not giving up. I have to remember that I've lost 88 pounds. And that's a success

HUGE success! You have already beat so many odds by losing and by keeping it off for as long as you have.

May I ask what would be so bad about considering 180-ish your goal weight? It seems pretty easy to maintain.

Or are you aware of continuing to unnecessarily overeat? Because if you aren't overeating, there isn't much reason to think you could eat a lot less, lose much more, and maintain. But if you know you are, I can see how that would lead you to think you should be able to get used to eating even less, and possibly lose more.

May I ask when you feel you "lose the struggle," what is it that you do? Have a snack? A sweet? Eat more than a plate of food? Permasnack for hours?

Thanks.

joasia wrote:180.
Still struggling but not giving up. I have to remember that I've lost 88 pounds. And that's a success

Wow, that's awesome! Congratulations, and good for you for not giving up!

187.3

yes stress eating has taken a toll. but I want to take control today.

The reason I can't consider 180 as my goal weight is because it still puts me in the obese category on the BMI scale. I am five foot five and at the very high end of my weight range I should weigh 145-150. which isn't my goal necessarily. But I can't keep creeping up either. I need to get back down to the 170s

Obese people who have lost 5-10% of their weight and are active have pretty good health prospects, as I understand. BMI on its own is just one measure.

At the same time, if you know you are stress eating, I can imagine you would like to see what life and your body are like without it. Was that the only difference when your weight dropped into the 170's?

I've fallen into old permasnacking habits after work again. Though the urge comes at stressful times, it was also just a habit, and the stress isn't really any greater than it was when I was ignoring the urge for a couple of years. But it can be very convincing. In the end, I, too, like you, just have to keep in mind at those moments when the urge is there that I want something else even more; the peace of knowing I've done my best to support smart eating for my physical and mental health. I have no guarantee that will take me to a lower weight consistently, though. That wasn't the only difference when I was at my lowest weight. I'm not sure I can live with those habits long term.

If you feel the kind of eating you were doing when you were in the 170's is sustainable for the long run, then go for it! I know you can get over the hump of just saying no enough times to get back into the "ignore the urge" habit.

I just realized that I could put it on my work calendar that I will hold out against the after work urge (for my sake and in solidarity with you) and it will send me a reminder just around the time I am finishing up for the day. I'm leaving for a no-electronics week-long event tonight and won't be back at work until the first week of October, so will try that then.

Wish us both luck!

185.3

That sounds good.

184.5

Monday and a new day

186.1

pumpkin scone from starbucks

homemade breakfast burrito with egg, cheese, beans, turkey, avocado, and salsa

2 unsweetened ice teas

bowl of homemade pasta with vegetable marinara and cheese

a few pieces of chocolate

did some tasting while cooking, but not much

going to try to walk today

186.7

189

the madness of stress eating must stop today!

Praying for you and that you can resist stress-eating today. I'm sorry it's so difficult right now. You can do this!

186.4. I can do this

185.8

so far the eating has been pretty good

2 hard boiled eggs
2 slices toast with butter
one slice of banana bread
one slice of cheese
15 oz green vegetable juice
2 cups berries and grapes

I walked one mile at work, hope to walk 3-4 miles after work, depending on the bad heat we are having

I know the things I must work on to go back to the 170s:

less sugar
less overeating
more walking and moving
more whole foods and less processed foods

I was in Sequoia National Park on Sunday. HIgh enough that the temps were in the 70's. Boy, does that make a difference in wanting to walk! I've been pretty much sitting since I returned to SoCal and this heat. The good news is that we are not heading into summer but into fall! I bet you'll feel a renewal after the heat drops. In the mean time, I hope we can both face down unsupportive urges. (I forgot I was supposed to think of others facing the same urges.)

Let's hang in there with our eating even we feel we can't move much.

187.4 or 9 I don't remember

I walked 5 miles yesterday, but I am still struggling with overeating from stress. But I am not giving up

Just get through as many gaps between meals without stress eating as possible. Even a few times a week can start a trend.

I've been taking a course based on DBT offered by Kaiser. It seems it is finally wearing down some of my most ingrained stressful thinking patterns, which are the source of most of my troubles. (My colleagues feel some stress, but not nearly as intensely as I do.) But it has taken several months.

I hope you can find some outside support as well.

185.8 or something
B = two small slices banana bread coffee black

L = 3 slices pizza

D = one frozen lean cuisine meal, one lolly pop

187.1

I overate Monday and Tuesday, but I also walked 5 miles Monday and Tuesday

onward

186.1

I have walked 5 miles the last 3 days. My eating has been bad, emotional, compulsive, etc. but I am not giving up

I envy your walking habit.

183.3

186.3

B = McDonalds egg, cheese, and bacon biscuit (no bacon), hash brown, ketchup, coffee

L = pork loin in mushroom sauce, mashed potatoes, green beans, sauteed cabbage

D = tba

going to try to walk

181.4

187.4

189

struggling but not giving up

I didn't weigh myself this morning, because I knew it would be bad. And quite frankly I didn't want to beat myself up about it all day. I have been binge eating as a response to stress. I ate so much last night, I don't even want breakfast. I have to get this under control and get this upward spiral to stop. And I have to walk. There is no excuse not to.

190.9

yeah, I'm trying not to panic. But this stops today.

Hi joasia - I'm fairly new to the NoS boards, but wanted to stop by and give you a word of encouragement. I noticed your story on the "Testimonial" part of the board--beautiful pictures, and wonderful progress!! Don't despair, and just keep pushing forward. You know you can do it--your testimonial is proof positive! Keep the faith and stay strong!

187. something. My goal today is to walk. Also, to cut down on the junk food. I have been eating way too much processed foods, fast food, convenience food, and sugary food. There is no excuse for it.

189.6

I ate like a crazed person yesterday. I walked 5 miles, but it goes to show you that exercise alone won't help if your eating is out of control. I feel sad and hopeless today

Hang in there. It'll get better!

This too shall pass. You did it before & you can certainly do it again.

Linda

190.5

My dad is having surgery today. I am stressed. And I really need to get back on track with eating. It is not a good feeling to be in a spiral of uncontrolled binging and stress eating. not good at all.

190

better than yesterday, I can do even better today

189.8

sigh, I thought it would be less, I didn't eat much this weekend. I even went down to 185 Saturday. But then I ate and drank sugary stuff on Sunday. sometimes i get very tired of struggling with my body and my weight

190.8

yesterday was ugly. so I am surprised I am only up one pound. I need to nip this spiral of out of control binge eating. I can do it.