Guilt for Pleasure
Posted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 9:34 am
I'm not even sure this is off-topic, but I wasn't sure where to put it, and figure there's no harm here.
I've been noticing a trend I find a little distressing -- a certain... pride in not taking pleasure in things typically found pleasurable.
Don't get me wrong. I knew a man who genuinely did not LIKE ice cream. I recognize tastes differ. What I find a little sad, though, is that people are feeling guilty for enjoying their food and the like.
Now certainly hedonism can be taken way too far. But I see very few honestly hedonistic people. I see rebellious people, I see angrily self-indulgent people (which is no genuine indulgence at all). What I don't see as often is people who choose to savor life. They're not thin enough, rich enough, whatever, to actually take a moment and order their lives and habits to truly savor the good things in life.
Treating a meal as an event, ferinstance -- dining rather than feeding. Candles are cheap. So is plain white dinnerware from the dollar store. You can set a table that is BEAUTIFUL with very little money, but yet we associate dining rituals with the wealthy. Sauce onnna carb can be lovely on plain dinnerware by candlelight.
We do it with other things, too. Exercise should be punishing, or we don't take the trouble to order our surroundings to be visually restful.
I think we, as a culture, are less "self-indulgent" and more scattered, spazzed and turn everything up to eleven. Which brings us around to Reinhard's idea of moderation being a good thing!
What's more TRULY self-indulgent, a box of pizza while reading a book in a room cluttered with things you don't need wearing a torn sweatshirt, or a lovely cup of tea in an elegantly sparse room while curled up in silky jammies and enjoying that same book?
What's more genuinely self-indulgent -- Ben and Jerry's from the carton standing at the fridge, or a pretty cut glass bowl of the same ice cream sitting at a table and listening to some really good music?
It's early and this is hardly a well-developed essay, but it's something I often think about. I think that what we call being self-indulgent isn't and that we should savor our pleasures better.
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I've been noticing a trend I find a little distressing -- a certain... pride in not taking pleasure in things typically found pleasurable.
Don't get me wrong. I knew a man who genuinely did not LIKE ice cream. I recognize tastes differ. What I find a little sad, though, is that people are feeling guilty for enjoying their food and the like.
Now certainly hedonism can be taken way too far. But I see very few honestly hedonistic people. I see rebellious people, I see angrily self-indulgent people (which is no genuine indulgence at all). What I don't see as often is people who choose to savor life. They're not thin enough, rich enough, whatever, to actually take a moment and order their lives and habits to truly savor the good things in life.
Treating a meal as an event, ferinstance -- dining rather than feeding. Candles are cheap. So is plain white dinnerware from the dollar store. You can set a table that is BEAUTIFUL with very little money, but yet we associate dining rituals with the wealthy. Sauce onnna carb can be lovely on plain dinnerware by candlelight.
We do it with other things, too. Exercise should be punishing, or we don't take the trouble to order our surroundings to be visually restful.
I think we, as a culture, are less "self-indulgent" and more scattered, spazzed and turn everything up to eleven. Which brings us around to Reinhard's idea of moderation being a good thing!
What's more TRULY self-indulgent, a box of pizza while reading a book in a room cluttered with things you don't need wearing a torn sweatshirt, or a lovely cup of tea in an elegantly sparse room while curled up in silky jammies and enjoying that same book?
What's more genuinely self-indulgent -- Ben and Jerry's from the carton standing at the fridge, or a pretty cut glass bowl of the same ice cream sitting at a table and listening to some really good music?
It's early and this is hardly a well-developed essay, but it's something I often think about. I think that what we call being self-indulgent isn't and that we should savor our pleasures better.
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