Sinnie's Check In

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Feb 28, 2019 4:56 pm

I've been thinking about starting to keep track again, but then decide I'm too busy. Maybe I'll just see how it goes! I log on from time to time and it's weirdly comforting to see familiar names are still here

I maintained my happy weight easily since having my babies. Once I had success calorie counting, I just coasted along. Then last summer, I had another stint with veganism after reading Valter Longo's book The Longevity Diet and it totally derailed me. I fell into this mentality that everything non-vegan, non-nutritive will lead to horrible disease. Maybe part of the concern came from my anxieties about getting something like cancer or Alzhemier's like my dad (who recently entered late stage, is in a long term care facility and it's very stressful on my family). I would watch channels on YouTube about people getting cancer and I was somehow thinking it's going to happen to me. Around this time my friend got breast cancer and it totally rocked me because this isn't supposed to happen right!? It's supposed to only be in my irrational thoughts, not reality.

Being the main caretaker and cook at home, it all falls on me to provide food for everyone. My husband is a hard core carnivore and my kids...well, they're kids and pretty fussy about food. It was too much and I found myself shoving nuts in my mouth constantly and it really led me down a bad path; not health inspiring at all. I couldn't get things back under control for months and my weight just went up little by little. I now see how that happens. It was an odd feeling after maintaining effortlessly for so long around 110-114. Now I'm about 120, which is fine, but after being lower I've learned for me that I definitely felt better ten pounds less (energy, appearance, mood).

It's sucks putting on weight, because losing weight is SO HARD. I think I got lucky because I lost it while breastfeeding, so for me it was like cheating - I didn't have to exercise or eat in a deficit, as the calories burned from breastfeeding took care of that - all I had to do was maintain. Now I actually have to put in the effort and I can't do it.

I'm a stay at home mom now. I definitely am happy with my decision, even though it's hard to give up something you put a lot of your time into and the money/pension/benefits. However, I don't want to be there either. But my God it's hard to be home alone all day and evening with twin toddlers and a kindergartener. My husband still works long hours and we never moved so his job is an hour+ away. Having said that, I do supply teach (or have the option to) two days a week which is great. On days I can't or there's no jobs, I just get time to myself. It sounds nice, but honestly it's only 6 hours they're gone and it never feels like enough time to do anything (the house is constantly in disarray) and it's hard to get caught up being the only one taking care of a household of 5!

That is my current life in a nutshell - it's my happiest life but not without it's challenges, frustrations and loneliness at times.

I am not sure what method I'm following with food. I came back here because it's probably best to have some structure. Although I'm naturally a grazer, my husband wants to get three meals going for the kids to see good habits. I agree, but it's hard. I'd love to do some Intermittent fasting, but I've had no success with it. My excuse is the kids. I just can't do it. I have very little "enjoyment" in my day and one of the pleasures is eating, even if it has to be smaller amounts. So that's that.

Should I just buckle down and do three meals? Argh! I can't even imagine holding out between meals, how pathetic is that.

Hope everyone is well, I am going to try and get caught up!

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Thu Feb 28, 2019 6:54 pm

Hi Sinnie! So wonderful to see you on here and learn all about your current life situation. Amazing how time flies and little babies turn into kindergarteners and toddlers!

Although I know you are crazy busy, I hope you have time to check in here just to share your day. I use my thread as an online journal, so when food is not interesting to talk about, I just talk about whatever. It's good for my mental health.

So happy to "see" you here!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Fri Mar 01, 2019 7:50 pm

Hi Auto! You are exactly right about treating this like a journal - I always found it therapeutic, not to mention it's kinda fun looking back at old entries and seeing bits of my life that I forgot. This board always seemed to attract great minds, really nice people.. so it's natural to return.

Anyhow, yesterday continued with my f-- it mentality. I realized (yet again) that when I am with the kids in the evening, I want to eat. Whether it's to curb the boredom, exhaustion or frustration (the fighting, crying, whining drives me crazy), I always snack and eat that couple of hours before bed. If I feel like I already ate too much then I fall into this "WTH" effect.

Today I've decided to follow a diet I made up some time ago that I enjoyed for awhile, it's basically 4 meals of 400 calories each. 1600 is my zone where if I have to lose weight, it will slowly take it off over time. I randomly assigned in my head 8am, 12pm, 4pm, 8pm because that coincides with my kids times and sounds tidy...but never really works out like that.

*Black coffee*
#1: bites of DH's sandwich; 1/2 bagel with butter and smoothie
*Black coffee*
#2: store bought ham&cheese sandwich, diet pepsi and grapes
#3 & 4: salmon, arugula and strawberry salad, peanut butter jelly toast, nuts

This worked out well. Ended up having one big meal in the evening with the kids as per usual, but I spaced things out a bit earlier in the day.

Soprano · Post by **Soprano** » Sat Mar 02, 2019 6:50 am

Welcome back, sounds like you have a good workable plan. Good luck

Jx

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Sun Mar 03, 2019 11:35 am

Thank you soprano!

So far things are going very well. I’ve focused on not overdoing it too early in the day. If I can keep my calories to around 800 by 4pm, I’m almost guaranteed I won’t overeat. I haven’t been strictly counting, just ballpark on my head. It helps me tremendously. I like to pick and eat a lot with my kids in the evening, I don’t count calories at this time of day, I just have what I want until I’m full and satisfied physically and mentally.

Anyways I’m at 118 this morning so here’s hoping the trend will continue down.

This is the first weekend in a long time I haven’t gone off the rails. I guess that was partially helped by having a play date in the morning, and getting my hair done all afternoon

Hoping for a lovely Sunday! Happy weekend all

Barbra · Post by **Barbra** » Sun Mar 03, 2019 3:13 pm

Hi Sinnie,
I totally know what you’re going through. I’ve been a SAHM for 17 years now! I can remember the days of having a 1, 3, and 5 year old so clearly! Now they are 15, 17 and 19 and I so wish I could go back in time! I miss those days! But I remember at the time being very tired and always putting myself on the backburner. It’s vital you do things for you! You know on airplanes they always say to mask yourself first so you can help others...same idea! Sounds like you’re finding a strategy that works for you with meals! I look forward to reading your updates!

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Sun Mar 03, 2019 3:18 pm

Yes! Glad to hear you got your hair done and the reprieve of a play date.

Do you and your husband get to go on date night once a week or once a month? We didn't when the kids were your kids' age, but I wish we had. I needed it so badly. We do now and it is so worth the $$. This past year we have started leaving them alone when we go (they were 12 and 8 when we started leaving them home alone), but before that we paid a babysitter. I kind of resented paying a babysitter and paying for dinner, but in hindsight it's totally worth it.

Now we go religiously every Wednesday night, and make the kids a quick meal before we leave. We are usually gone less than 2 hours. The kids love it because they get to play extra electronics.

Anyway, I know it's a hassle to find a regular weekly babysitter, and I know it's expensive, but it can change your life.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Mon Mar 11, 2019 3:02 pm

Hey auto, you’re right a weekly date night would be sooo nice. As of now, we don’t do it at all. I don’t know any babysitters, and they are so young and do not take to strangers well. I know in the coming year or two it should be a priority to find somebody!

Truthfully I have been a bit lost with my eating. I saw the post on the main form about BLE and it’s definitely peaked my interest. At the very least, maybe just getting back to three meals.

March break starts today, it’s 9am and I’m already exhausted. Lol. Feeling completely devoid of energy.

liveitup · Post by **liveitup** » Mon Mar 11, 2019 4:28 pm

Good luck Sinnie! It sounds hard, and I hope you find a good daily groove soon.

Imogen Morley · Post by **Imogen Morley** » Wed Mar 13, 2019 7:22 am

How wonderful to see you here again! I definitely share your frustrations as a young mum. Nighttime snacking/binging is currently my biggest problem, too. All I want to do after N has gone to bed is eat, eat, eat. Haven't find a workable solution for myself yet, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. Good luck!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Apr 09, 2019 6:37 pm

Sorry for the lack of posting, I probably shouldn’t have started a check in because my life is just different now. I’m so consumed with these young children!

In any case, I’m back on track with my tried-n-true. Definitely the least popular method but it is absolutely, unequivocally the best possible way for me. It’s just counting calories but I saw this tool online (https://www.losertown.org/eats/cal.php) that tells you what you would weigh each week if you ate a certain number of calories over time. It’s hard to explain, but I looked at that and saw if I just decrease by the littlest bit each day, by summertime I will be back where I was the last few years. I think I fell into this trap where I expected too much too soon, and this showed me that I can’t expect any loss day to day, but every week I could be down maybe 0.4 pounds. And I have to look at it in a very long-term way. This is obviously quite obvious LOL but it triggered something in my brain that made a whole lot of sense. I kind of believe in eating a maintenance amount of calories, with the thought that if it takes X amount of calories to weigh X amount, if I eat that amount eventually I will get there. I don't totally get what people have against it so much, but I guess that's because I don't experience the downfalls

For me its literally the best tool ever because it just focuses on my own body's needs - "Am I hungry?" If the answer is yes, I eat, and log it on a food calculator app (I don't do My Fitness Pal or the like).

I got a Fitbit which is interesting because I thought I was sedentary but my daily steps are easily 10,000 + (more like 12500) and even 15000 some days. I don't feel like it though, just slow and steady all.day.long.

Anyways, I'm down to about 117 and no more what the hell effect really at all. According to my Fitbit, my maintenance is around 2000 (a bit more) so I just eat to that if necessary. It works for me, because it's the guessing, the "did I eat too much? too little?") that drives me crazy and can lead down a bad path.

Since this is so far off No S, it doesn't seem to make much sense to post. I'm a little hesitant even writing this. I hope you're all doing very very well

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Tue Apr 09, 2019 7:08 pm

Hi Sinnie!
Thanks for posting. We all just find what works for us and support one another here! Of course, I often offer unsolicited advice, lol.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Sep 17, 2019 4:22 pm

Not too long ago I tried to do 3 meals again, and it was successful. I started to get cocky thinking I have it all figured out and then it all falls apart. It's tempting to always want to go back to the calorie counting which worked for me in the past and I still genuinely don't think is bad - but - at this very point in my life it works best on days I'm alone. Maybe I will try it again without guilt next year when all my kids will be in school. For now, the 3 meals is to provide me with more time & space for things that should matter more right now. I do enjoy dieting as a hobby, weird as that might be, but I do recognize it might encourage me to make decisions differently that may not be the most beneficial for my family right now. Its not that I really need to lose weight, but putting on those 10 lbs kinda sucks. I'm still down a total of 20 lbs from starting No S like over 10 years ago, but those ultimate vanity pounds came off through calorie counting. I know my goals need to change a little at this time in my life, it just can't be the main focus. So that brings me here, where I think holding myself accountable to sticking to this approach may come in handy.

My new "rules":

1. Stay off youtube. Watching fitness influencers or diet/food channels for entertainment often makes me question what I am doing. Waste of time.

2. Since the goal of this eating approach is to free up my time and mental space for more important stuff, posting needs to be quick and efficient in general. I apologize if I don't always respond or comment, but for me this can easily turn into a time waster too. I'm trying to limit my time on devices and I have a tendency to get obsessed with the board, I write too much (like right now, haha) etc.

3. I will eat at 10am, 2pm, 6pm. This worked exceptionally well last time, and somehow seemed to be the biggest component with my success. Since the school year has started, I have a feeling it may get tweaked since bedtimes need to be earlier, but working on that.

4. No food is off limits. When mealtime rolls around, I'll just eat whatever I feel like. No rules literally. Just stop when full or satiated.

5. No snacking at all. Avoid calories between meals (or keep it minimal with drinks).

6. There are no "days off." If something comes up, do the best I can, and if needed, just get back on plan. No biggie.

I wrote the following back in the summer but never posted it, just kept the window open on my laptop. I thought I would post it here just for future reference:

"Today is my 36th Birthday. I thought I might start logging a bit because I've found a way of doing No S recently that has worked beyond my comprehension. I'll try to keep this short but in the last week I've just kind of stumbled on a 3 meal pattern that has worked SO WELL for me. How this is possible after years and years trying to No S, I'm not sure, but to keep the pressure off myself I just keep saying I'll do it as long as it works. If it stops working, I'm 100% free to go back to calorie counting (which I've loved for the last 4-5 years).

Anyways, I'm not doing anything special. But one day I randomly did 3 meals, deciding to eat at 10am, 2pm and 6pm (roughly). I don't really need breakfast; I don't get hungry. But there's a bit of psychological aspect to knowing I have it to look forward to. I knew I never succeeded having long gaps between eating, but it seemed eating an early breakfast really threw me off. 10am seemed like a sweet spot - early enough to be breakfast but late enough to get a bit of an appetite. Waiting until 11am veers into lunchtime territory for me. At that point, noon is too early for lunch so I thought 2pm sounded good. At this point in the day, I can easily wait to have dinner at 6pm which helps avoid nighttime overeating tremendously.

I know a week doesn't seem like much time to say anything. But, I've never been able to make it a day, let alone a week. AND WITH SUCH INCREDIBLE BENEFITS. I don't think about food at all, I don't binge, I don't get low blood sugar feelings, I don't get hangry, I don't watch anymore fitness/nutrition influencers, in fact I deleted YouTube off my phone because I found that just messed with my head and wasted time.

Usually, if we're on vacation, have an event, or even if it's just the weekend - it puts me in a 'screw it' mood and it's not enjoyable. Over this week, even dealing with all the above mentioned circumstances, didn't derail me in the slightest. I'm in complete awe and confusion really. I feel like someone who doesn't think about food or their weight. It's so weird. I'm debating even about weighing as when I see I'm doing well I tend to overeat. I dunno. This time everything seems different. Why? A part of me believes I was so hesitant to do No S again because it kind of corresponded to a time in my life that wasn't so pleasant. I associate it with not fun times. Now I'm acknowledging to myself that life is totally different now, those stressors are gone and I'm free to try this with absolutely no guilt or issues to go back to calorie counting.

So what is my exact plan. Well I've already mentioned I eat at 10, 2 and 6. I don't snack in between. At those meals I have whatever I want and DO NOT follow any kind of restriction at those times including the one plate rule. I've tweaked this over the past week and hit the perfect groove. I eat what I feel like until I am satiated and full. If I do the one plate, then I want to finish everything on it whether Im hungry for it or not. And oftentimes, I'm still hankering for something else and will end up eating again because I'm not satisfied. So for example, I made some leftovers for lunch but it wasn't tasting good, so I threw it out and made a protein shake, which totally hit the spot. We went to Niagara Falls over the weekend and had buffets and lots of desserts - no issues. Then we went to the zoo, and normally I'd be getting all hot and tired and wanting snacks...and my husband mentioned that I hadn't even asked once to stop for ice cream or whatever. I find I'm really enjoying time with my kids more that I don't always have one eye on food or part of my mind contemplating it. Sounds pathetic, but I was totally guilty of that."

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Tue Sep 17, 2019 6:34 pm

Sinnie - this is such a happy posting! So glad that you are finding your NoS groove with these meals times.
How old are all your beauties now?

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Sep 17, 2019 10:06 pm

Hey auto! Thank you! Twins are 3 and oldest is 5

10am: sandwich and veggie soup. Coffee with cinnamon flavoured coffeemate and a lil whipped cream dusted with cinnamon.
2pm: Mr. Noodles, veggies & dip, 1/2 nectarine, animals crackers, 2 chocolate lindts
6pm: rice, grilled cevapi, chicken nuggets, Haagen daaz cookie dough popsicle and small piece frozen red velvet cake.

I am starting my period today and felt like I couldn't get full, yet not hungry either, its obviously hormonal! Weird food choices but Whatever lol.

lpearlmom · Post by **lpearlmom** » Wed Sep 18, 2019 1:20 pm

Great to see you posting again! I like your plan.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed Sep 18, 2019 4:53 pm

Hello Linda! Thank you so much for the welcome. It's nice to be back. You were always a great source of inspiration for me.

I am having a very tough day with the kids. Nothing really bad, but boy I'm struggling. I guess maybe I do need this writing outlet. Blah - I said I wasn't going to go on and on here. I yelled so much this morning. I try not to but unfortunately I have a tipping point where I can't take anymore. I do apologize. And I hate to say it, but I feel like it needs to be done so they realize I'm human and can't just act any way they want. They only seem to learn this at times when I blow up.

Anyway, I also feel my twins are behind where they should be (or maybe just compared to where my older daughter was at 3.5 yrs). I think maybe they were a bit forgotten in the daily chaos. I am trying to work with them before kindergarten next year. My oldest was already in kindergarten at this age, could write very well, reading a bit, etc. OMG these twins can't even spell their name. My fault. Any tips on teaching them at home? I have no idea where to start. This morning was SO exhausting after 10 minutes. Unfortunately preschool isn't an option at the moment, but they will start a program for 2 hrs on Fridays.

At least this new plan isn't interfering with life. Hell, maybe now that I am not food-focused, I am realizing all that needs to be done in LIFE. I feel pretty terrible with that realization actually.

10am: 1.5 pieces toast with lots of peanut butter, a little jam. Black coffee.
2pm: huge bagel sandwich, couple gummies, Lindt chocolate ball
6pm: dried mango, hotdog, corn on cob, juice, some of kids ice cream cone (went to a back to school event)

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Wed Sep 18, 2019 6:52 pm

Twins are pretty much always "behind", although I don't put much stock in that idea. They'll mature on their own terms, and you are providing a loving, enriched environment. It'll all be fine!!!!! I promise!

As far as reading, my two cents is just read to them! Read to them as much as you can, and any moments that you want to work on the alphabet or whatever - just read with them instead! It is the number one thing you can do that will make a measurable difference LONG-TERM (we're not talking about kindergarten, but long beyond). Read, read, read! If you hate reading to them, have audible or something that does audio books during all the quiet and down times.

gingerpie · Post by **gingerpie** » Wed Sep 18, 2019 11:47 pm

I have to agree with the read, read, read advice. Can the older one read to the twins? They'd all love it ☺ If you really think they need letter/number help, find books that focus on counting and letters - there are a million of them. There are also a kajillion kids songs about numbers/counting and alphabet/letters. You can always toss in a few songs if you get tired of reading. And don't forget to relax and enjoy what you can when you can. It really will all be fine in the end.

Hope tomorrow is a better day.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Sep 19, 2019 2:18 pm

I really appreciate the reading advice. And it's good to know that I don't have to do anything complicated or force teaching when they're not interested - reading a lot feels doable and easy. What is it about reading to them that is so beneficial? Is it less the actual reading and more to do with the habit as they get older? I do read at night to the three of them, but it's chaotic. My oldest is learning to read so I work with her, and I try to read but not everyone listens. Its not really fun but I'm trying my best.

Anyways, yesterday just continued to go downhill. It turned into a crappy day. I started to snack on dried mango shortly before 6pm, then I ate at the school event while thinking I'll just go back to calorie counting tomorrow so I can snack if I want too. Anyways I managed to do OK and this morning my mindset is back on track. I'm feeling depressed, but it's b/c DH was acting mad at me last night, and I don't know what I did and he wouldn't tell me. That really bothers me.

10am: I made a cereal with bran buds, chia, flax, different nuts, hempseed, cinnamon, little protein powder, cashew milk..it was really so good
2pm: 4 cevapci, rice, nectarine, 3/4 bun, juice
6pm: pasta w/ lil bit cheese, olives, roasted cauliflower/carrots, cookie, Haagen daaz bar (split with kids) and a few candies

Any experience on kids with dyslexia? Not for me, but I know someone whose child is struggling a lot, not diagnosed yet as he's only 7, but can't read, remember sight words or letter sounds etc.

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Thu Sep 19, 2019 4:14 pm

Hey Sinnie - so sorry about the hubby thing. That sort of situation is like a dagger in my heart. Over years (of therapy, I kid you not) I have made progress in recognizing that my husband's behavior is really HIS issue, not mine. That takes such a burden off my shoulders. But I know it's still hard.

Reading, ah, let me settle in to one of my favorite parenting topics.

*Benefit 1: Internalizing the rules of grammar by hearing lots of good and complex sentences.
So, the benefits of parents' reading to children has a lot to do with hearing the cadence of language. By hearing proper language with pauses at the right spots, etc., children will internalize the grammar of language. This is how they eventually will "get" the rules of English without necessarily being able to explain why a comma is needed in a spot, or why they need a plural verb, etc.
*Benefit 2: vocabulary
The other massive benefit is vocabulary. Without even needing (a lot) of definitions, they will absorb words within context. It's a beautiful thing. In the classroom, there is no greater predictor of academic success than having a teacher read out loud to students in the classroom! Can you believe that? So the evidence suggests that even in HIGH SCHOOL good teachers should be reading to their students.
*Benefit 3: Reading comprehension
Kids are able to understand FAR BEYOND what they can read. So, for example, your older daughter may only be able to read two word phonetic sentences, but you could be reading lovely picture books to her that use far more complex and flowing language. omg I love children's picture books. I still read them. One of my favs is Bill Peet - literally anything by him. The Kweeks of Kookatumdee was always a favorite. So, if you read a lot of great kids' books to your girls, their reading comprehension will amaze and delight you. Their questions will make you laugh and smile, and words and books will cause a warming in everyone's hearts.

I am waxing so sentimental right now.
Benefit 4 if you have "observers" - some kids like to watch the page with you while you read. In this case, they will be learning even faster and probably end up crazy good spellers. That said, I tend to think spelling is an inborn thing, depending on how a kid visualizes words in his/her head. Both of mine are wacked-out good spellers, and I promise we never practiced it. On the other side of that some of my smartest students ever (when I taught younger kids) were my worst spellers. I learned then not to equate spelling with comprehension.

For the chaos - I have good ideas here too! One thing I did was EMBRACE the chaos. I'd get out legos for them and then read while they played (actually, Creator and I are STILL sometimes doing that while I read to him). I made sure to pick books I liked too, in case they really did tune me out for a while. And I just read while they played in the playroom. I'd ask for a reasonable amount of quiet, but that might not be too realistic for you at this point. My 13 year old still listens sometimes (we are currently on Harry Potter #5 with Creator, and Challenger has already had me read these to him)
BATHS - I read to my kids in the bath!! I still read to Creator in the bath (he's 10), but he likes lots of bubbles to have more privacy now.

I just read until they are ready to drain the tub.
MEALS - I would get the food on the table and then read while they ate. Now, it tends to be more during ice cream or other desserts. They are happy to listen while they are stuffing their faces.
CARS/BEDTIMES - Audible. I pay for a subscription and it has been worth it worth it worth it. Creator would often read along in his book and listen to the audible version.

On to your dyslexia question - Challenger couldn't read more than a few words until the END OF SECOND GRADE!!!!!! He was 9!!!!! I was homeschooling him and would take him in for his annual testing and for two years straight the testers told me he probably had dyslexia. My research on how to work with dyslexic kids basically came down to going slower, and using phonics like a fiend (this is my simplifying of complex literature on the topic, but I did do my due diligence). Anyway, we kept chugging away - 5 min a day of basic phonics was about all his little brain could handle. And at the end of 2nd grade, something flipped in him and he became a fluent reader almost overnight. It was dumbfounding. The greatest thing about it all is he has NO IDEA how far behind he was in reading, because I didn't make a big deal about it and he wasn't in a school setting to get stuck in the poor reader group or get pulled out, etc. So when Creator was beginning to learn to read I was like oh boy here we go - but that little booger somehow learned to read with NO INSTRUCTION from me. I am not kidding. He just absorbed it somehow and it fit exactly with how his brain works.

So. They are all different, and they all have their own beautiful unique music to dance to and song to make.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Fri Sep 20, 2019 6:39 pm

Auto, I can't tell you how much I appreciate your detailed and informative post. You are helping some crazy gal on the Internet do something so good for her kids. Isn't it amazing in this life we will never meet some of the people who have this kind of impact. But you've really inspired me to do more, and I want to say thank you. I am also passing on your experience about the reading troubles, giving hope to this mother that things really will be okay.

Things continue to go really well regarding my eating plan. It's weird how this method really clicks - I just can't let my mind take me down bad paths - but I'm enjoying this freedom so much I generally don't even go there.

10am: I was really hungry and ate a lot! An egg, two pieces buttered toast, some yogurt, dry mini wheats cereal and cold brew coffee w/ cashew milk and splash cinnamon creamer...Still hungry so had a piece of toast loaded with peanut butter. Funny enough, in the past I would've called that a binge and derailed my whole day. Today I'm like cool, I was hungry, ate and it's done with. Didn't think about it again until typing it right now!!

3:30pm: Cold brew coffee with cashew milk, small sandwich w. slice ham and bowl soup (with beans & pasta & cheese on top), red velvet cake

6pm:

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sat Sep 21, 2019 12:30 am

I'm just jumping all over the forum today. Keep hanging in there!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Sat Sep 21, 2019 8:05 pm

Hi oolala!! Nice to hear from you! I hopped on your thread quickly, only time to read the most recent entries, but I saw you also read Longo'd book. I am slowly getting enticed to start focusing on nutrition a bit, but I'm warning myself a little to be careful of too much too soon.

It's interesting to note that yesterday I started to go off track a little, but was able to steer myself back on road. I think it's really important I don't skip meals even when not hungry. I ended up snacking a bit, then overeating and saying "ok that will be dinner" and snacking later. After the kids were in bed, I seriously thought about indulging a lot (basically binging) and somehow thought about the morning, having breakfast and suddenly realized it wouldn't feel good at all.

So today has been much better as I am trying to learn from missteps going forward and make each day better. I am so happy with the three meal structure and the way I've framed it so I never have to starving before a meal as I just hate that feeling which is what always caused to fail in the past. I can't go more than 4 hours typically. Some days I need to adjust the times b/c as Fall comes we're going upstairs a bit earlier.

7:30 am (ate early with kids): French toast, maple syrup, English muffin with pb and banana
1pm: fried chicken, fruit salad and few candies
5pm: pasta w/ olive oil & Parmesan, bean soup, garden tomato/cucumber/pepper salad

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sat Sep 21, 2019 10:13 pm

I had already made a lot of changes before No S; meals were not my problem. I couldn't have handled much nutrition pressure back then. I couldn't even stand trying to curtail my wild S days, and boy were they wild! If had known then what I know now? Nah, it probably wouldn't have sunk in.

I always liked getting really hungry, but until No S, NOT more than giving in to the urges to eat/binge, which usually came with three hours of a meal. If I could get past that, I was usually ok.

You're doing it!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Mon Sep 23, 2019 2:38 pm

Thanks oolala!

I don't feel like logging my food from the weekend. I did fine though, but did eat past fullness every meal. My weight is stable, while although a good thing in general, not helpful when I'd *really* like to lose the last 10 pounds. I don't mean to complain but it's so exhausting to think I was already there, it wasn't hard to maintain, and I have to put this work in for no reason. Why did I gain it back? I got over confident, thought I could easily go back to what works, then a pound turned into 2, it went up and down, until it settled a little more each month. Boom. Right back where you started. It's really that easy.

Anyways, I don't get emotional over it anymore because the science has been proven and hasn't significantly changed for a very long time. I find this comforting, actually. There is nothing I missed, I am not doing anything wrong, I'm literally just eating the calories to maintain my weight. Let me do a quick calculation...yup...I'm eating well over 2000 calories each day. I'm not sure I'll incorporate calorie counting yet, but I can't help but acknowledge that it could pretty much get me exactly where I want to be in a specified time period if I wanted. But that would require sticking to something pretty diligently for a few months. I am a person full of excuses sometimes.

Well, I'll give it a go for today:

Breakfast: 500 calories (cereal, pb toast, chocolate mint flavoured coffee)
Lunch: 600 calories (vegan "fish sticks", protein bar, some candy, iced latte)
Dinner: 1000 calories (McDonald’s)

I likely won’t bother with calorie counts going forward. I don’t think I’m committed enough to make much difference.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Sep 26, 2019 6:05 pm

Things are continuing to go very well and I'm so pleased. I'm not really sticking to the three meals, but I have learned some habits that are sticking. Namely, I am able to not snack at night anymore, I don't suffer from what-the-hell when I've overeaten a little, I'm eating more proper meals and less snacking...overall it's great!

I continued to tack on a little calorie counting, and for the first time in a long time things feel like they're really coming together. I'm not opposed to going back and forth to my 3 meal schedule.

My weight is right on target for the slow loss I am aiming for, which is approximately 0.5 lbs per week, or a little less. If it works out, I'm making a goal to be back where I was by New Years. I don't want to rush this as I've got a pretty decent metabolism as far as I can tell, and don't want any under-eating to sabotage that!

My best approximation is that I burn about 2000 calories a day, so I subtract a measly 250 calories to obtain my 1/2 lb loss per week. It's amazing how much food I can eat, and at the same time how EASY it is to eat so much more than my body needs.

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Thu Sep 26, 2019 6:39 pm

I cannot eat the same amount I would have been able to had I not gained 40+ pounds and lost. Them's the breaks. If I'm honest, I'm not legitimately hungry for much more, but that doesn't stop me from yearning for more. That little extra pleasure in the mouth! That's the only place I feel it, though, for those extra mouthfuls. I'm working on doing without them. I don't think I'll get back to the lowest weight I maintained, though, and I'm not willing to do much different to get there, so here we are! Habit, habit, habit!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Feb 04, 2020 6:55 pm

I've been contemplating this for awhile, how to get back on track. I really felt lost for awhile, was really overthinking it. Came up with a system based on the success of various methods from the past. It has culminated in this:

3 meals a day at 9am, 1pm, and 5pm (varies based on season). 1600 calories per day divided 400 breakfast, 400 lunch, 800 dinner. These are rough guidelines, but without going into unnecessary detail, I figured out what I liked about different diets/lifestyles and hit a groove the last few days. I thought I would record in case life derails me, I'll know how to realign myself. I couldn't remember in any great detail how I managed to keep my weight so effortlessly where I wanted it before, so this may be helpful.

I really woke myself up when I saw my weight creeping up in the 120's. Not because it's a bad weight in itself, but I could clearly see that extrapolated year after year.

There is no particular reason for 1600 calories. I always thought that was a number I could live with. I am sick of over analyzing this, and wherever my weight lands based on this will have to be fine. It was more work intuitively eating, always thinking about my hunger levels, and it just didn't seem natural at all. Not for me.

So far I've felt extremely peaceful about this. Very unobtrusive and takes a lot of thought out of it for me. I don't use the apps or anything.

Today has continued on a lovely path. My daughter is out of school because the teachers are on strike today. So we went shopping and now I'm exhausted. Drinking a cold brew coffee, getting a bit of relaxing time and then its pick up time for twins daycare. How will it be almost time to make dinner...

Breakfast (9ish): fresh donut and coffee with my girl
*This left me a little shaky as I presumed it would. We were out and I wanted to try it. I had a protein bar that was in my car prior to lunch so I wouldn't feel so bad.
Lunch (1ish): stir fried cabbage, veggie potstickers, some carrots, juice & cold brew with sf syrup and almond milk (I made lunch lower calorie to account for the bar)-still very full

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Feb 11, 2020 5:58 pm

I haven't had a chance to update this, but I will try from time to time. My method has been going extremely well, and I'm not food-focused which is wonderful (Other than occasionally planning what I'd like to eat, or contemplating meals). I decided to only weigh in once a week. I'm not going to lose weight fast on such a moderate plan, so I don't need to see the "lack of progress". I am in it for the long haul, and if I weigh in and it sucks, I just need to honestly ask myself how I did that week. I'm hoping by summer I'll see a few lbs gone. Anything is better than a steady creep upwards! Or what feels almost worse, that annoying up and down the same couple of pounds.

Basically what I've been finding successful is 400 for breakfast, 400 for lunch and the remaining 800 after 4pm when I'll make dinner, maybe snack with the kids, have some dessert etc. Sometimes I'm not hungry for a full breakfast all at once, so I kind of space it out over the morning. This is going real well.

Breakfast 9am: bagel and cream cheese; huge shake made with banana, berries, almond milk and scoop greens powder (haven't quite finished this, but I'll prob drink it at some point).
Lunch 12:30: veggie soup and 2/3 frozen pizza

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Tue Feb 11, 2020 10:06 pm

Glad it's feeling easy and pleasurable.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:06 pm

Thanks oolala. It really is.

So I've hit my first bump this week. Last night after dinner which was a garden salad with feta and a vegan chicken breast (I also made wings), I joined the kids for cereal before bed. This isn't a normal occurrence for us, but the kids were sweetly performing songs from the lion king and I got caught up in the spirit I guess. I didn't let it get off the rails, but kinda thought maybe I'd cut back a little today. I learned quickly this morning that mentality doesn't work for me. I found myself out of the routine I've created, started picking at food when I don't usually think to eat until 9am. I soon saw what was happening and rather than giving up as I normally would thinking this also doesn't work, I pulled things back together. A rather No S thought came to me "Mark it and Move on" - I won't make up for any discretions after the fact. Each day is chance I get. No makeups.

So I had breakfast early at 7am: French toast, walnut roll (potica) and watermelon.
I was hungry at 10 and had more watermelon, veggie soup and made a "coffee" (dandy blend with vanilla MCT powder)..This puts me at approx 500 calories. I'm hopeful the rest of the day will get back on track! I'm loving the new me - this 100% would have been a binge day for me in the past.

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Wed Feb 12, 2020 6:47 pm

Nice recovery, Sinnie!

Are the girls like.... 5 and 3 now?

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Fri Feb 21, 2020 11:15 am

Yes auto! Oldest is 6 now and twins are actually almost 4 in a month

They are getting much easier in a lot of ways.

I had a rough go for the last week, and I was really down about it. Every day that didn't go well seemed to mess up the next. I got out of my rhythm. Then it dawned on me it totally 100% coincided with my cycle. My whole life I didn't get any pms or period symptoms but as I get older it is really changing. I gain weight, get cramps, feel irritated and down, it's just awful. I never totally understood the whole thing on "that time of the month" until this point in my life. How weird is that. At least I can see and anticipate it will affect my eating and weight temporarily so it doesn't send me spinning.

Well it ended yesterday and I had a great day! I went to work for the day and ate well. My weight dropped 3 lbs too. Need to remember this next month. Recapping my meals:

No breakfast as I rushed out the door. Over my lunch break I spread out a big container of strawberries and pineapple, eventually ordered a turkey sub, followed by a coffee with cream and sugar.
I was quite hungry before picking up the twins from daycare, so I had a protein bar as I grocery shopped with oldest kid.
Came home and made dinner. Had a big plate of salad (cucumber, tomato, onion, feta, olives and dressing), one cevapcici and cup of rice. Dessert was two mini cupcakes and black coffee. All came in at 1600 calories and was a very good day.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Sat Mar 21, 2020 2:04 pm

I’m gonna try 3 meals again. All this covid stress and life in general, my weight isn’t budging. I’m just needing something new to focus on.

Starting weight: 122.2 lbs

Breakfast: hashbrown and a large pancake
Lunch: steak & Swiss bagel sandwich, parfait, bowl of cereal
Dinner:

From experience, I know I need to feel satiated after my meal, so I’ll eat until that point. Any type of foods are fine. I can’t make it longer than 3-4 hrs so I’ll aim for 9am, 1pm and 5pm. I’m not feeling positive but let’s fake it till we make it

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sun Mar 22, 2020 6:34 am

Did I miss something? Were you systematically doing something else besides three meals?

Hang in there!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Sun Mar 22, 2020 3:22 pm

Well, unfortunately yesterday was a bust.

Oolala, I stopped doing three meals - in the No S fashion - years ago. After I had my first child, I figured I had time on my hands so I started calorie counting instead, just eating when I was hungry. It worked so well over the course of the proceeding years and two more children, that I easily maintained my goal weight of 110-112 for all that time (from about 2013-2018). It was only when I started getting into veganism, watching and reading all the plant-based/vegan blogs and youtubers, longevity stuff from Valter Longo etc that it spiralled out of control. I found it very stressful to match that lifestyle with my family and led me to start overeating, thinking calories didn't matter as much if you eat healthy, and I slowly just couldn't get back to where I was. Once I realized it wasn't the time to worry so much about perfectionism in my food choices, it was kinda too late. So now I've been at this point where I just can't find the energy or motivation to lose these few pounds - even though I truly felt so much better. Why was it easy years ago and now it's not?

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Sun Mar 22, 2020 11:31 pm

So now I've been at this point where I just can't find the energy or motivation to lose these few pounds - even though I truly felt so much better. Why was it easy years ago and now it's not?

LOL Sinnie! You are pretty tough on yourself. We get older, we get busier, we have more responsibilities, we have more baggage, on and on. Yes, it does get harder but you are doing great. You are only a few pounds away from where you feel the best.

Sorry yesterday was a bust.

Today will be better, hopefully.

One day at a time, making choices that make you feel good about how you care for your body.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue Mar 24, 2020 5:32 pm

Thanks auto. I really appreciated to read that. I know you're right, but somehow it feels validating when someone else can acknowledge HOW HARD life is once you have the responsibilities of marriage, kids growing up and all that. It's kind of amazing how incredibly taxing it is. I guess we take it one day at a time, but only now can I actually *truly* understand how hard my mom (especially) and dad worked.

This covid stuff simultaneously stresses me out and is providing much needed rest & calmness. The first couple days I was positive I would go insane, I was horrendously bored, and honestly couldn't imagine how months of this potentially will be. I was like "omg this is only day 2". And then I started getting used to it and my introverted nature at times even started LOVING it. There is a certain relief to get out of the shower and realize, it doesn't matter that I have nothing to wear, and I don't need to put on makeup! Not that I wear tons but when I don't put it on I can't help but think I really should, my skin is bad, what if I run into someone at the store etc. Yeah super vain but it can make me self conscious, although as I get older I genuinely care less, and it's more about how it makes me feel, not for others. Anyways, benefits to being home all the time. We don't have to do the crazy morning rush, I'm teaching the kids how to make their bed every morning, some cooking and simple cleaning etc. Usually there's no energy for this stuff. I haven't really don't any real work with my oldest

I just hope we can get this under control because the suffering is too great, I feel just awful for hospital staff and all they must be going through. I worry about my mom getting it and I could not handle her dying in such a horrific way.

I am doing pretty good eating-wise the last couple days. Sometimes you just hit a groove what feels like for no reason. A lot of my stress comes from social anxiety and not having that on my plate seems like a good opportunity to focus on eating correctly and getting back to good habits. For me, that means eating when I am hungry, counting calories, and saying no to myself when I want to randomly snack, eat my emotions, take something just because it's there.

DMJ75 · Post by **DMJ75** » Tue Mar 24, 2020 6:34 pm

Hi Sinnie,
I was reading through some journals here for inspiration and came across your post.
I agree with everything you said about this Covid situation. In some ways it's horrible, but in others it has shed light on how much we do that really isn't necessary. I realized how much stress I could cut out of my life by dropping some activities.

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sat Mar 28, 2020 6:46 pm

I visit No S so seldom these days that I don't know if I am repeating myself. I don't have kids but will say something gently: I wish very much that my mother had made me participate more in helping around the house. There were three of us and I think all of us should have been involved in doing dishes (no dishwasher), laundry, cleaning bathrooms, etc. And my mom didn't even work. But I still think I should have because I think it's good for everyone to understand they all have a stake in the household and it's a contribution to everyone. I have a friend from high school with five brothers and sisters. Mom never did laundry, dishes, or vacuuming. My ex-landlord's daughter (he had custody) did her own laundry from age 9. (She once later told her dad she could run the house better than he could. They have a very close relationship now.) I'm shocked these days when I hear how much modern working moms still do so much housework themselves. Kids on farms sure had to do plenty. Then again, maybe your kids are very young, but I beet they could help with something. How you get to that with them I am clueless about.

I know I shouldn't but I feel a little guilty about your situation with eating because I'm almost sure I'm the one who posted about Longo. I have gone through a period of upset over the changes I wanted to incorporate because of his ideas, but other influences as well. I've gotten even more strict

and do sometimes feel frustrated and even a little sad to feel so different from nearly the whole culture, but I feel convinced and want to continue. I am single so don't have to contend with close family, though it is a bit of a source of anxiety and division for me when I anticipate visiting, but also have a very fragile social network and wonder how I can expand it. I 'm not enough of a purist to try to pal with the hardcore adherents. Going to shift the rest of these thoughts to my thread. Warning: I've continued to look at fasting- also feeling guilty for having brought that up on this site, as I think it was a small topic when I first did, and I don't like diluting the No S message-, so that will be there, too, though I don't know if you ever looked at my thread. No problem if not

I'm still in awe of people who can do the eat-when-hungry stuff. I get totally absorbed in trying to read my body and what I would need to eat. I've also added foods and meal makeup habits that I am glad I have at this point and I don't think I would have been led to them naturally. But I am also a weirdo now. It sounds lovely that it worked for you and I'm sorry it feels so thrown off.

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Mon Mar 30, 2020 9:02 pm

Hi Sinnie,

I just wanted to say that I really relate to your struggles. I feel like I felt so much the same way when my girls were young. I also seem to veer between Intuitive eating, calorie counting, and No S. Oh and Intermittent fasting which I absolutely couldn't have done when my kids were young.

But I found the same thing about calories. 800 before dinner seemed to be the magic number for me too.

Anyway, I understand the frustration, I feel it too especially now being stuck at home every day with my kids. Even though they are older, they still demand a lot of time and attention. I am an introvert but now I am surrounded by at least one person pretty much 24/7.

I hope you are holding up all right!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed Apr 22, 2020 2:11 pm

Pinkhippie, it’s good to know other people can understand what I’m talking about. I’m really struggling now. I can’t stick to anything and my weight is slowly going up and up. I’m just so tired. And it’s not even like I’m doing drastic diets or anything, I’m just trying to eat reasonably. As much as I love this time of being home it’s also really getting to me. I know we’re all in the same boat, but none of my friends deal with the eating component and they’re all thin. I hate how some people are so lucky to just eat normally and never have to struggle with this sh** lol. I can’t help but moan about how I was kinda there. For awhile when I was maintaining I didn’t think about it. I wish I just continued doing what I was doing then. It’s so disheartening.
Anyways, I’ll do No S today,..because honestly I’m just so lost bored tired and overstimulated with kids that I don’t know what to do with myself.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed Apr 22, 2020 2:13 pm

Well on this note, maybe I’ll actually stick with it for a full day if I write it down. I’ll try to plate my food. Breakfast was virtual plated.

8:45am Breakfast: avocado, avocado on bagel and Pbj on toast (all of which got shared with kid).

1pm: salad, few bites beef/broccoli/rice frozen meal, soup and couple crackers, bite apple, protein shake (more like a dessert how I made it).

5pm: mashed potatoes, 2 meatballs, roasted asparagus, cold brew coffee added to the left dessert-like protein shake.

So I’ve made it to lunch but have no idea how not to virtual plate because I’m making food for so many people, and I like to taste a lot of things.

Today wasn’t too bad actually. I’m still trying to decide on my parameters but I’m kinda feeling the 3 meals thing again.

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Wed Apr 22, 2020 2:43 pm

Hi Sinnie!

Im sorry you are feeling so discouraged. I really feel like I have been there before and I think many of us have. And I really relate to being stuck at home. This is hard to deal with. Can you get any time at all to yourself? That might help if you could.

I have found for myself that it's really helpful to write down my food on this forum. They say that being aware of what you eat actually helps you to eat less and I find that to be really true. With the structure of No S, you only write 3 meals a day, which is nice too!

Good luck today! You can do it.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Apr 23, 2020 1:29 pm

Hey Pinkie, I forgot how helpful it is to check in and write it down. I am loaded with excuses, mostly that I tell myself I don't have time but truthfully I waste a lot of time I could easily pop on here and stay accountable to myself. Time to myself? Almost impossible. Since we're all in the house 24/7 I can't get away from the kids lol. My husband does spend time with the kids every night, but it's so close to bedtime and they depend on me for everything - maybe another excuse - but it's just hard to separate myself because my husband will ask me to join them, watch some tv together etc. On the weekends I do get out by myself to grocery shop which is Heaven. I love having my husband home, even love this time with the kids because ironically I was thinking to pull my twins out of daycare because I didn't love the place, and they're starting kindergarten in the fall, and I almost had all my required supply days in to stay on the Substitute List, but then this covid crisis made the decision for me! So to also have my older daughter home is extra special. But like many people I'm sure, I do struggle with never being able to have MY own time, space etc. I feel like I can't get anything done. Everyones talking about all this spring cleaning there doing, I can barely do my regular cleaning. Even if the kids are entertained, I'm often too unmotivated to fo anything.

But I feel really good about yesterday and I'm excited about three meals today!!! I have a good feeling about this

I'm thinking to stick to 3 meals, I'll try not to virtual plate too much but it's technically ok, I'm on the fence about sweets. I'm mulling this over but my thoughts so far are leaning to 3 meals all the time, reasonably done (appetizer is fine sometimes, eat what I want, just no overeating) and sweets or snacks outside of that when it's truly something I want during a memorable moment. Sometimes that could be something as simple as an evening walk with my family and stopping at the coffee shop (which isn't really possible until covid is over, but that's the gist).

Breakfast: 2 slices weight-watchers toast (using up stuff from freezer) loaded with avocado. Vanilla almond milk cafe au lait. I thought that would be a good way to end off breakfast with a little sweetness and now I wait until 1pm-ish.

Lunch: was way too much lol. I was hungry and the food was so good. I don’t particularly feel like listing the numerous items, but I will say from experience that it’s less about enjoying a meal a little too much, and more about the constant snacking/heavy overeating/junk food that’s been putting on weight. So now I’ll just wait for dinner - and keep on keepin’ on! What a refreshing outlook for a change.

Dinner: pasta puttanesca, green beans and some ice cream/an Oreo

lpearlmom · Post by **lpearlmom** » Thu Apr 23, 2020 3:15 pm

Boy can i relate to not being able to get anything done. With everyone home all day, i feel like im being pulled in a million different directions all at once. Im kind of in survival mode especially with the new puppy. My to-do list consist of 3 things and im just happy if I get those done each day.

Im glad you’re enjoying your family being home though and hope you find a eating pattern that feels good!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Apr 23, 2020 5:51 pm

Thank you Linda! I really love how I’ve always felt there’s so much in common among the lovely people on this board. I guess that’s why I periodically come back since like 2005 and or something

Speaking of your puppy, that reminded me I reached out to local shelters in case they needed any fosters for dogs during covid and while they didn’t, I came so close to wanting to adopt another dog! My husband gently reminded me we barely give enough attention to our current one. I grumbled a bit but realized maybe this isn’t the best time to have another dog to get used to. Every so often I start looking and then kinda smack myself saying like don’t you have enough on your plate that you can barely handle lol. But when my kids are your girls age, you can bet I’ll be getting myself a big dog!

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Thu Apr 23, 2020 6:43 pm

My house is messier than ever these days.

And I haven't gotten any yard work done.....

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Fri Apr 24, 2020 12:13 am

I hear you on the challenge of getting time to yourself! That is so hard, especially when the kids are young. I had to institute a "break time" for myself. I am on it right now actually.

It's about 30- 45 minutes I spend in the bedroom by myself and I would say it was instrumental in helping me stop or at least decrease a lot of my emotional eating. It was hard when the kids were young to get this time though.

Sounds like you are doing good! I think your focus is definitely on the right place with just concentrating on eating your 3 meals. Don't worry about eating too much, just keep working on building the habit. I know it took quite a while for me to stop eating a lot at every meal.

And my house is absolutely more messy these days with all 3 kids at home every single day...

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Fri Apr 24, 2020 6:04 pm

Hey ladies - at least we can all relate right!?!

So far today I’ve managed much better with actually using plates.

B: toast with Pbj
L: endive salad and mashed potatoes
D: chicken leg, some steak, rice, zucchini and a few Easter chocolates/one Oreo afterwards.

I did have some cold brew coffee with vanilla almond milk. Tied me over before lunch. Had a little more before dinner and a few baby carrots as I prepped dinner. Day 3 went off without a worry!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue May 05, 2020 2:26 pm

So, thought I would update my little No S experiment. It actually went really well. I didn't have perfect days, and overate, BUT I was able to stop myself from snacking or "what-the-helling" - which is huge for me. I got discouraged though, because for all the effort it seemed I was putting in, not eating when I otherwise would have etc, I didn't lose any weight beyond the initial 1 pound water weight. It felt really frustrating to remember that calories count and I was just shifting eating them in big meals, but it felt like so much thought and effort to do that. In that state of mind, I came across information where this woman explained how to lose weight without lowering your metabolism based on a study that was done (the Matador study - I might have spelled it wrong). Basically, if you eat say 1500 calories for months, eventually your metabolism will adjust and 1500 will become your maintenance calories rather than a deficit, which is what makes keeping off weight so hard. I'm not explaining it very well, but it struck a cord and I wanted to try and follow her advice. I won't go into much more detail as I'm sure this isn't vey interesting lol But the work around to this problem is to only have a small deficit and periodically go back to maintenance calories. For example two weeks deficit, two weeks maintenance. This made so much sense to me, seemed very doable, and I would rather be able to keep the weight off even if it means taking a long time. So I spent about a week figuring out my maintenance calories which seems to be 2000 calories. I'm really glad I never did very low cal eating to jeopardize my metabolism. It surprised me a little, considering I'm inactive, short and 36 yrs old. So the plan was to do a 20% deficit for two weeks and then 2000 calories for two weeks and cycle back and forth.

And yet, I still couldn't really do it. I think that No S's success comes from the hard and fast rules - I think where I struggle is too much open-ended-ness. I'm thinking of incorporating this into No S, but I feel they're at odds. It seems like a process I'd love to try because if it works, it'd be amazing. But my usual problem, I can't stick to anything.

I'm going to do three meals today. I think it's worth it to see how I feel going back to it for a day.

lpearlmom · Post by **lpearlmom** » Tue May 05, 2020 2:46 pm

Yeah I think you’re right about our bodies adjusting to whatever eating pattern we’re doing after awhile. It really wants to maintain it’s current state if possible. That’s why ppl who are intermittent fasting are encouraged to mix up their eating schedules instead of doing the same thing every single day. For example doing 16/8 one day & 23/1 the next is better than doing 23/1 every day. It changes your calorie intake without having to actually count calories which I think is why I do so much better with IF than calorie counting. It just becomes too tedious.

You know I’m in the same boat with not being able to stick to any plan for very long, but right now I’m just trying to embrace that. I actually wrote up 10 (yes 10!) different plans that I’m going to try out for a couple weeks each. I’m going to collect data on each including how easy it is to stick to and how much weight I lost and then see if there’s one I’d like to try for longer than a couple of weeks. Or maybe I’ll just really enjoy constantly switching it up and that’ll be my long term patten. I did tell myself to stay with one plan for a couple of weeks even if I’m having trouble sticking to it day to day. Anyway don’t give up. Something may eventually click!

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Tue May 05, 2020 7:15 pm

Thanks for the update!

I think the best thing about No S, and maybe why people keep coming back to it, is the habit establishing part of it. Unfortunately, that seems to be the hardest work with the least immediate results. However, I really think that habits can be invaluable and even if you leave them and come back, they are a little more ingrained than they were before so even though that month of hard work didn't show up on the scale, it still built your habit muscle and it's stronger than it was last month. So that is something!

Anyway I am a hypocrite because I recognize the truth of what I am saying but its just as hard for me to stick to without results and it's hard for me to stick to anything. But, I have noticed that my habit does become stronger every time I come back to no S.

Good luck!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed May 06, 2020 1:33 pm

Linda, that is actually a brilliant idea. I love the idea of just accepting we don't have to pick a way of eating and stick to it for decades. I'll embrace this too. I commend you though, because even if you don't stick to something forever, you are so disciplined when you do stick to things, and you do it for a long time (I couldn't even do the two week trial you mentioned). You did No S perfectly for so long I remember. I've just never had that kind of grit and determination, to be honest. I guess that's why I am personally drawn to calorie counting, I'm not really sticking to anything and there are essentially no rules. That sounds terrible doesn't it!? I'm really not like this in any other aspect of my life.

Pinkhippie, you nailed it. The hardest work with the least immediate results. 100% true. The irony is I probably had the best results with three meals only (recently) than anything else, both mentally and physically. I remember briefly waking up at night and thinking "hell ya I succeeded again yesterday!!!" because I guess I usually I'm so up and down with my eating and it affects me when I wake up. It was such a good feeling. My husband tried to warn me that maintaining WAS PROGRESS. Of course, he was right. But when I'm in that vulnerable state, and I start letting other ideas creep in, that's the end of that. I find to succeed, I have to become mildly obsessive and read ONLY what pertains to my plan and how to succeed at it. I tend to get overwhelmed by other ideas to optimize what I'm doing. If any of that makes sense.

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Thu May 07, 2020 3:43 pm

I am so much the same way. I do get obsessive when I decide on an eating plan and I read every book I can on it. If I read anything different, I think well maybe this would be better... I also like calorie counting for the freedom it gives. Eat whatever, whenever, just as long as the calorie amount is correct. I wish that would work long term for me.

That is great that your husband is on board and supportive!

I hope things are continuing to go well for you!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Tue May 12, 2020 1:31 pm

Thanks for relating Pinkhippy. It's such a good feeling to be understood.

Well, I continued to allow myself to be lured out of three meals, and Sunday night I said to myself...this really isn't getting anywhere. For some reason, at this very particular point in my life, the freedom of calorie counting just isn't working. While coming to the same outcome on No S (less food) it was seemingly clear to me I needed the psychological aspect reined in from No S.

So I fully believed in being able to transition back to no snacking, because the alternative wasn't attractive anymore. It used to work, now it does it. I have accepted that. And for all the effort I was putting in everyday trying to keep track of my intake, I was weighing more and more all the time. I realized I have put on around 14 lbs from where I was maintaining before!!! Hard to believe how easily it can happen as you get used to a new extra pound here or there as normal. All the sudden...

So yesterday was a fantastic day back on three meals. I accomplished way more, and despite some major stressors and time of month, I didn't use food AT ALL to deal with problems. I made a huge plate of egg whites/1 egg/cheese and broccoli all scrambled, 1/2 bun with avocado and finished off breakfast with vanilla cream in my coffee. Lunch was very delayed but eventually had a piece of toast with pb & j, and leftover egg scramble, plus a few M&M chocolates. Then I made dinner of sausages, pierogies, charcuterie platter (mostly for the kids but we loved it too), little wine and dessert was a nuts, dates and dark chocolates with a cold brew coffee. I ate without thinking about amounts, or calories and managed to feel 100% satisfied and happy. I couldn't tell if it was too much but I was fine for the rest of the night and didn't even think about snacking.

I woke up this morning 1 lbs lighter and feeling amazing to be back. I know I am not going to lose major weight or anything but damn it feels good to not be trying so hard everyday and cycling on the same hamster wheel day after day.

Day 2 of my comeback: 122 lbs

Breakfast: small bagel w/ cream cheese and jam. Low sugar yogurt. Big apple. Black coffee

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Wed May 13, 2020 8:35 pm

Sounds like you had a great day with the 3 meal structure! It does feel really good to get off that hamster wheel.

I hope you are continuing to do well!

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Wed Jul 15, 2020 12:54 pm

Hey everyone,

I stopped doing three meals, as usual. Jumping around from this to that, delaying eating for awhile in the morning (did work wonderfully for a minute), calorie counting etc. I've had success in that I haven't put on weight and even managed to lose a couple pounds, but I know it's fleeting. I'm one overeating session away from it. Why things are different now, who knows. Why it was easy before, who knows. All I know is that it was almost one year ago I tried to return to three meals, it went well initially, and I lost interest quickly. Yet here I am literally the same weight. What was the point of wasting a year, at the very least I could be in much better habits right now. It's hard to deny that burst of motivation I get, but I have to admit it doesn't last. I'm always able to think I can start over, or I'll just count it, or whatever. I guess because I used that method effectively for years, was happiest and thinnest, I want to recreate it, but it's just not working.

I don't want to be here in one year again, wondering what I could have accomplished if I just stuck to something reasonable, habit forming.

I guess the reason three meals attracts me is because with firm clear rules about when to eat (mealtimes), it eliminates a lot of excuses I make for myself when I am tired and bored. In the end I am positive I would eat less and feel much better. I try to talk myself out of it by thinking things like oh well what if I have a day where my mealtimes are thrown off and I then I overeat because im too hungry etc. Like cmon Sinnie! Why obsess about the exceptions? Its all excuses my brain makes so I don't have to commit to something.

I think I'd like to give this a true shot, but Im afraid to commit to one year or something knowing by noon I'll be lured away. Maybe just for today, I'll commit to three meals around 10, 1 or 2 pm, and then 5 or 6 pm. I don't put parameters around what food, or amounts. I know I need to eat to feel satisfied or I'm done for. I'm pretty sure those aren't my issues - its definitely the grazing, the after dinner eating, the "oh I lost count so Ill just start over tomorrow" eating...

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Wed Jul 15, 2020 5:19 pm

Hey Sinnie!

I am so glad to you posting again. I really relate to all your struggles. I have had very similar experiences of leaving No S and coming back to it a year (or years) later being the same weight or higher and wondering what I could have accomplished if I had just stuck with it.

I was thinking just the other day that I actually did No S one habit at a time without really realizing it. For me, I stopped eating after dinner, but still had snacks during the day. Then I only had sweets on weekends for a long long time. Then I eliminated snacking during the rest of the day, and finally, only very recently I stopped having seconds. I think that can be a really excellent way to ease in and make it more sustainable. I also really have a hard time with the one plate rule. I want to eat until I feel satisfied, especially if I am not going to be snacking.

So to me, it sounds like you have a great idea just to focus on 3 meals regardless of amounts or composition. That is one habit that you can really work on, and after you have mastered it, in my opinion it will make all the other habits easier. If you even need to go to the next habits. Maybe working on just 3 meals a day will make a big difference for you.

Anyway, be kind to yourself and know that we are here supporting you!

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Wed Jul 15, 2020 10:06 pm

Hi Sinnie! I hope your little girls are doing well and that you are getting occasional breaks from them.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Jul 16, 2020 12:46 am

Thanks so much pinkie and auto!!! I so appreciate the welcome back

Today actually went great and no snacking.

9:45am Breakfast was toast with pb and jelly (maybe 2 pieces, kids kept eating it and then I had to make more lol)

1:30pm Lunch was apple slices, Cooked broccoli veggies mix with butter, pesto pasta

6 pm Dinner was some chicken noodle soup, veggie dog in bun, bite of kids pizza, one pork rib. Had some dessert with it which was few bites of ice cream, some of a dark chocolate nutty granola bar thing, small piece brownie and Nanaimo bar with black coffee.

I was pretty full after dinner but I’m happy with the day. I had a cold brew coffee with almond milk and sf vanilla as I made dinner. I really had no hunger today. It was Easy.

For future reference, I’m starting this at 120.8 lbs. I don’t yet have a weighing plan, but I’ve always regretted when I don’t.

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Thu Jul 16, 2020 2:26 pm

Weight: 120

Yesterday was remarkably easy. I felt very satiated, it wasn’t hard to make it from meal to meal, and otherwise was very enjoyable. I’m pretty pumped right now, but know this feeling won’t last so I’m hoping to hang on. I think the biggest change between what makes it easier this time than years ago is timing of meals (esp delaying breakfast util later in the morning) and ignoring the rules about sweets and plates which just ended up causing me anxiety and lots of WTH effect thinking.

Today also happens to be my 9th wedding anniversary 🥰

10am: 2 pieces French toast made with egg whites, and vanilla bean Greek yogurt mixed with some plain Greek. I use a lite syrup. Sooo good and filling.

2pm: steamed buttered veggies, some roasted veg tortellini with Parmesan and mozzarella, an apple...not totally satisfied So I had a few bites of a brownie and then a fruit/oat bar.

6pm: some leftovers, little chicken, little rice and what I really wanted - a variety of the cereals I just bought. I overdid it a bit because it’s so processed I wasn’t really getting a “full signal”. Noted for next time. I dipped into a couple marshmallows and Clif bar as well.

*Wasnt hungry but my energy was really lagging around 1pm, so I made a coffee with about 2 tbsp vanilla creamer and tiny dash of sf van syrup. Really hit the spot.

**another thing to note, I’ve noticed that I fill up pretty quickly which leads me to be picky that I eat what I like before I get full. That’s what tells me to stop, so I make sure to eat what I want before the fullness gage closes. I think when not doing 3 meals, physically I get full, but I tend to keep eating because of emotional/mental reasons. There’s always calories that can be used up or made up for later. But when The meal timing and fullness dictates when I stop, it’s much different

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Thu Jul 16, 2020 4:04 pm

Sounds like things are going great!

I also delay breakfast and I find it really helps me throughout the rest of the day.

Congratulations on 9 years of marriage! Are you guys doing anything special?

Sinnie · Post by **Sinnie** » Fri Jul 17, 2020 12:35 pm

Thank you pinkie! Nope, nothing special to celebrate haha. We might go to dinner at the place we had our reception at, and bring the kids too! They are pretty darling when they try to be brave and talk to the waiter to order. Its usually “Hi! Can I have a gingerale please” It’s so cute. Man, they are growing up. Because of Covid the restaurants around here only allow limited people on the patio. We’ll see...

Okay the start of day 3! Can’t complain, so far so good. I’m truly having a new mentality this time. I know I will have days where I can’t/don’t do three meals. I’m not allowing myself to accept that that’s a reason to derail me. It’s just life. Today is my nephews birthday and we’ll go over for a small party.

Weight 120 lbs.

automatedeating · Post by **automatedeating** » Fri Jul 17, 2020 3:15 pm

Happy Anniversary and I hope you get to go to that special restaurant!

pinkhippie · Post by **pinkhippie** » Fri Jul 17, 2020 7:38 pm

A special restaurant would be a nice way to celebrate if you could!

Sounds like you have a great mindset about the three meals!