Back again but with a different mindset this time, I hope. Lockdown has been a difficult time in many ways, but it has changed some things for me - I have been able to slow down, reflect and make changes.
I have embraced my grey hair. I never thought I would be able to do this, but I am actually pleased with how it looks. My hair is very thick and coarse: it's always very short and grows quickly and messily so a few weeks into lockdown my daughter gave a buzzcut and I decided to let the grey grow through. And what a surprise - the new growth is silver and it sparkles in the sun!
I've realised that control is very important to me and that this leads me to be impatient with others. (Apparently, the people around me already knew this!
) I've managed lockdown by taking control, both at home and at work, and I am trying to do this with kindness.
I have also paid a lot of attention to the way I eat and have learnt that I eat too much and that certain foods make me feel nauseous. I've learned that a small piece of chocolate every day is satisfying. I've learnt that I feel better when I eat smaller meals without too much bread and with fruit and salad; shop bought biscuits and cakes don't really agree with me; I prefer tea without milk; I prefer to delay eating in the morning; eating after dinner is too much; I don't really like take away food.
Over the last few years I have dabbled in No S from time to time. I've also dabbled in WW, SW, Intuitive Eating. No S is great because it fits into life so easily, but in the past I have struggled with the succeed/fail aspect of each day. Once I have failed, what's the point in continuing for that day? Also, while I know that weight loss is important for health, I don't hate the way I look. I am probably about 28 pounds overweight, but looking different isn't enough of an incentive for me. I do want to FEEL different though. I want to be fitter so I am not out of breath when I walk. I want to be able to bend over to paint my toe nails without my belly getting in the way. I want to have more energy, and I want to enjoy food without feeling bloated and sick from overeating.
When following No S in the past I have failed because I have treated it like WW etc - ie a diet which restricts me therefore I will rebel. This time I'm going to drop weight loss as my focus and instead use the rules to change my eating habits for good. For example, I find the time from lunch to dinner very difficult as I get up early, I am tired by 4pm and we eat late. If I eat a lot of carbs at lunchtime I am sleepy in the afternoon. Therefore I will eat a smaller lunch and I may have a 4th mini meal at tea time if I need it. This will be a mini meal on a plate - not a mindless raiding of the fridge - and it may include a small piece of chocolate, as I have really enjoyed this during lockdown. I'll use the one plate rule and I won't eat seconds - I eat enough (sometimes too much) at dinner and I don't need more. This will mean sticking to this way of eating at weekends and not going all out because 'it's allowed'.
I'm not going to weigh myself regularly - I'm sick of seeing the same numbers on the scale not Instead I'm going to focus on habit and eating food that suits my body. I'll use this space to reflect and adapt and take good advice from people who've been here a long time. Is this a bit wishy washy? I'm not sure, but I know that I need to change, and I can't see a more sensible and sane way of eating anywhere else.
(British/American family in the US)