Just joined the forum....

[mackinac19]

....although I've been lurking for over a year! I read and enjoyed Reinhard's simple yet witty description of the No S diet. I also bought and read the book. I've also really enjoyed this discussion forum and the thoughtful comments that people post.

My issue is that even though No S seems like the most sensible and doable plan I've come across, I STILL can't stick to it. I lost a large chunk of weight many years ago and since then have struggled to maintain; my weight will vary by up to twenty pounds. Right now all I'm trying to do with No S is maintain, but I keep binging in the evenings.

I've always done No S with the mod of one dessert a day (since I love chocolate and really would be very sad not to eat it every day), but I wonder if having a sweet every day makes it harder to stick to No S? How many of you out there think it's important (or even necessary) to do vanilla No S, at least initially....? Thank you.....

mackinac19 (pronounced 'mackinaw19')

[finallyfull]

I wonder if you could experiment with this (I think each person has to learn what works for them). If you have the dessert after lunch or dinner, maybe have your chocolate after breakfast and see if it makes a difference? I also wonder if your breakfast is big enough? Lots of people aren't hungry in the a.m., including me, but I wait until I am hungry, around 10 a.m., and then have a decent size breakfast. It really helped me resist snacking later in the day.

I think nighttime eating is many things to many people, but some possibilities are that you have been too "good" all day so the pressure builds up and you can't keep it up, or that you eat something that triggers cravings, or of course all of the emotional possibilities, such as boredom, loneliness, sadness or all of those things. I also think calorie counting can cause eating "because you can" rather than sticking to three reasonable meals. If you've "saved up" then you can splurge, and one thing leads to another.

Hope any of that is at all helpful. Welcome to the forum! It is very supportive.

[leafy_greens]

Mackinac, I am a chocolate/sweets addict and have not had it on a weekday in over 10 weeks. If I can do it, anyone can. Also listen to Reinhard's podcast on the importance of strictness (#13).

[maryashley]

Welcome! I, too, am a newbie. And nighttime eating was probably what has put me in this state of needing to drop some weight to stay fit.

[MJ7910]

Mackinac, I am a chocolate/sweets addict and have not had it on a weekday in over 10 weeks. If I can do it, anyone can. Also listen to Reinhard's podcast on the importance of strictness (#13).

same thing here. i dont' eat sweets on Ndays. That simple . If i do though, i dont' beat myself up over it. that is what caused the binges before. i just move on. but anyway there are a few ways "around" it if you want to call it that. you can eat some good snack bars that aren't really sweets so they are kind of fun. they also give you fiber, protein, etc. there are certain ones i like, lunas, fiber ones. those are good ways to enjoy a little bit of a fun treat and not have it be a true dessert. when i think of a true sweet i think of something that is pretty much devoid of nutritional value with a sweet taste. i dont' really consider nutrition snack bars to fall in that category. or a little bit of tea with stevia can do the job for me too. i now stay away from all artificial sweeteners because i discovered they actually do cause GI distress and i feel so much better when I don't eat them!

[mackinac19]

I appreciate your replies! Maybe I should just bite the bullet and try ONE day without chocolate...? If other diehard sweet addicts can do it, perhaps I can, too. I'll be honest, though - it sounds impossibly hard. I can't even remember the last time I've gone without dessert for a whole day....

[Shortformyweight]

I've only been doing No S for about 3 weeks, but I did have a couple of days where I didn't succeed in resisting a snack. I just had it, and didn't let it get out of control. Maybe allowing yourself that one sweet will keep you from bingeing, so maybe it would be appropriate to make that modification.

I'm finding it's getting easier as I go along. I had a tough day yesterday, I really felt hungry (although I don't think I was hungry) when I got home from work and wanted a snack badly, but I resisted, and waited until dinner to eat again. And I was satisfied at the end of the day.

I've been thinking about this, and maybe you could change your habits up in the evening to avoid the temptation of snacking. Could you go for an evening walk or maybe read a chapter in a book instead? Do you knit or crochet - that's a good way to keep your hands busy. Maybe pick up a pen and journal instead of snacking?

[oolala53]

Yes, bite the bullet, not the chocolate.

I've been NO S-ing for three years and the more important chocolate is to you, the more important it is to eliminate it from N days, IMHO. I was CONVINCED I would not be able to live without chocolate candy, brownies, frosting, etc., every day after more than 35 years of mostly compulsive eating. It has been one of the most empowering habits to keep desserts to weekends. I sometimes go through phases of falling off the wagon, but honestly, I can feel the difference, and my life is not better with small daily sweets, which for most people, leads to big daily sweets. I prefer leaving room for my wonderful savory meals and fruit. If I eat sweets, I get too full and/or quickly go back to expecting them and overeating them.

You are basically letting the neurochemicals rule your actions and it is a mistake. They will make irrational thoughts come to you, thoughts that make eating sweets or overeating sound reasonable. That is the chemicals talking! IGNORE THEM.

If you are eating good quality food in reasonable, moderate amounts, and you want to learn to limit sweets, I strongly suggest you just tell yourself that THERE ARE NO GOOD REASONS TO EAT SWEETS MORE OFTEN THAN ON WEEKENDS AND NWS DAYS. Zero. Nada. No matter what urges or thoughts occur to you, just think, "I've eaten enough food for today. Giving in will just reinforce the habit. Resisting will make easier in the long run. I'll be glad I waited."

There are exceptions here, but really, most successful longtermers are Vanilla No Sers. It's worth the battle.

[mackinac19]

I like that - 'bite the bullet, not the chocolate'!

Honestly this will be a huge step for me. As I've read about No S I've always nodded my head for the 'no snacks' and 'no seconds' rules, but I've just kind of ignored the 'no sweets' rule as if it simply couldn't apply to me. But since I am still having trouble controlling my eating, I do wonder if the chocolate is some kind of trigger....

One day this week I will try not to eat any sweets. I'm not sure when. Tomorrow seems too soon! But I do want to try....after all, if you could do it after 35 years of compulsive eating, Oolala, maybe I can, too! I HAVE noticed that, as you say, the long-term success stories on this site do seem to involve Vanilla No S.

Shortformyweight, thanks for the suggestions on changing my evening habits. Actually I'm really talking about the time from maybe 9 pm until midnight...a great time for Netflix and munchies! I don't knit or crochet but I'm sure I could find something better to do than eat! (I just don't seem to have been motivated to DO IT!)

mackinac19

[noni]

Personally, in the past, I had taken the path of a small sweet after dinner when my No S habits were a few months established, which turned into a small dessert also after lunch, and the rest becomes a blur. I thought having one sweet on each weekday would control my weekends, but it just made for wild weekdays AND weekends.

[AndreaRN9]

I've always done No S with the mod of one dessert a day (since I love chocolate and really would be very sad not to eat it every day), but I wonder if having a sweet every day makes it harder to stick to No S? How many of you out there think it's important (or even necessary) to do vanilla No S, at least initially....? Thank you.....

mackinac19 (pronounced 'mackinaw19')

Don't mod it. Go Vanilla No-S. It's not necessarily the sweet that's making it hard to stick to No-S, it's the mod itself. Once you allow yourself to tweak/mod, you set up a scenario in your mind where compliance with things you find challenging becomes subject to negotiation. If it's too hard, well, no biggie, just mod it. But here's the problem with that: the mods start out tiny but get bigger as you go along or during times of stress. Pretty soon your eating is back to what it was prior to No-S, which wasn't working for you because if it was you wouldn't have gone on No-S to begin with.

No-S has a relief valve built into it and that's the S days. Confine your snacks/sweets/seconds to S days. Reread Reinhard's discussion of strictness and "putting a fence around the law." Strictness actually does make things easier, especially as time goes on. It really does.

[mackinac19]

i just thought I'd post an update....so far I haven't been able to go dessert-free for a day. I'm not giving up hope, though. Maybe someday soon I can do it.

The thing is, I'm not doing badly weight-wise right now - hovering at around 145 lbs, which is my goal (I'm 5'8" tall). This is probably why I'm having trouble finding enough motivation to cut out dessert. If I drift up a few pounds, maybe that will give me a kick in the pants....

[leafy_greens]

I am sort of in your situation. At a normal weight but with food addiction. I started No S with a bang in early 2010, then fizzled out after only one month due to my chocolate addiction. I too could not go a day without sweets. Nothing could convince me. After three years of soul searching and chocolate grazing, I'm back to give it another try, because nothing works like No S. You will probably come to realize in your own time that the daily sweets are annoyingly keeping you from your goals. That you have to grit it and just get through the uncomfortable parts. That No S is the miracle diet you've been searching for. You never have to give up anything, only wait 5 days!

[wosnes]

Generally I think it's important to follow vanilla No-S for at least a few months to a year before making any modifications. However, if the small dessert is your habit and your habit is working for you, why change to fit this program?

I've been at this for over six years. Initially, I thought I was following No-S to the letter, but I had completely missed the one plate rule. I had one serving of whatever was being served at a meal. If a meal was served on more than one plate --well, that was okay. I think I was about a year into it when I realized that that I wasn't following it to the letter, but since I was having good results could find no reason to change what I was doing. Doing No-S wrong is probably one of the reasons I was able to do it!

I'm a huge fan of Pam Anderson (no, not that Pam Anderson), the cookbook author. Several years ago she wrote The Perfect Recipe for Losing Weight and Eating Great.

The big take-away from the book, for me, wasn't following what she did, but this statement:

Diets are like trying to sell everyone the same style and size shoe. If this way of eating is forced and not really you, you’ll revert to your old patterns every time. Better to find a way to eat for life.

That's exactly what Reinhard did: he found a way that he could lose weight and maintain that weight loss. Most importantly it was something he could do for life. Then he shared what he did with us. It's going to work for many people, but for many others it's not going to be quite right. It may lead to the desired result (weight loss), but still not be something that you can follow as written for life.

Other cultures have habits that are similar to No-S and many of us grew up with habits similar to No-S. Most aren't quite identical to No-S, but they all work. I think having a similar set of habits that work for you is more important than following this set of habits.

[mackinac19]

Thank you for all the thoughtful comments. I think you are right, wosnes: the spirit of No S (and all of Reinhard's Everyday Systems) is really about building good habits that work for us. The problem is I'm still not sure if dessert every day 'works' for me as a habit or not. Weight-wise, I'm doing pretty well, but sometimes my eating feels out of control. But - maybe I would still have that issue even if I WASN'T having chocolate every day....

mackinac19

[leafy_greens]

But - maybe I would still have that issue even if I WASN'T having chocolate every day...

Never know until you stop doing it!