Jen’s Eating Simplified (:

[Jen1974]

We ended up putting off going to the cabin until tonight. It felt good to have a little extra time to catch up before leaving. My younger kids had plans so we took my oldest out for pizza which was fun. His friends have had a COVID outbreak & are all quarantining (his test came back negative) so he’s been up for hanging with us

We ate late & I maybe pushed the limits on full since my husband wanted Italian nachos & the crust was extra thick on the pizza but not uncomfortable & I was happy enough with the day overall!! With warmer weather I notice I’m less hungry & eat really light during the day & am hungrier & eat more at night. Whatever is going on it seems to be working. I wore a pair of my smallest white jeans last night & they fit great

After I had kids my weight always went way down. I was too busy to bored eat & did pretty much a version of No S. I didn’t eat overly healthy during that time but made a point of eating what I wanted & not worrying about the perfect diet & feel like I’m doing something similar now. With all the travel my diet hasn’t been anywhere near perfect but I’m not snacking & honoring less hunger with less food. My goal hasn’t been to weigh less, it’s to be hungrier later & it feels like a better goal for me. Weight loss as a goal is something to rebel against & make up for later & has never lead to actual weight loss that sticks

[pinkhippie]

Yay it sounds like you are doing so well! I can really relate to Intuitive eating being "Entitled Eating" That is how it always was for me.

was too busy to bored eat & did pretty much a version of No S. I didn’t eat overly healthy during that time but made a point of eating what I wanted & not worrying about the perfect diet

This is how I always ate too when I was at my healthiest weight for myself. I agree that weight loss can't be the goal, but honoring less hunger with less food is a great one! Or to be hungrier later.

Im glad your sons test came back negative!

[Jen1974]

Me too on the negative test Pink we were all cheering & high fiving :LOL:

We made it to the cabin for a quick trip. We only got to be there for a night because I have to go in to work today but it was still nice to have a little time away with just my husband!! My eating was good enough at the cabin but last night I ended up getting too hungry for dinner & pushed the limits of full a bit!! Getting home from the cabin always seems to throw me for a loop. I love my house but don’t really love the area I live in so I’m never that excited to get home & am always planning for my next escape I feel like I come home a little bummed to be back & tend to sooth myself with extra food.

I am ready for some normal though!! Me & my kids head to the cabin next Wednesday so until then I’m excited to eat at home & have more mellow nights!! My husband has his first business trip since COVID next week so we’re going up without him & he’s meeting us there. He used to travel almost every week so it’s been really nice that he hasn’t had to!!

My kids school went to remote learning yesterday. My daughter was pretty bummed, she just got new fall clothes & was excited to have someplace to wear them too. I didn’t think it was going to last so I’m not that surprised. I have been planning a California RV trip so I was a little excited we’ll be able to do that!!

My elliptical broke a few weeks back so I haven’t done more than walk/bike. Yesterday I got to do elliptical at the cabin which felt great but I noticed I was hungrier. I feel like less exercise has coincided with my clothes getting looser which is funny. It really has been less fruits & veggies and less exercise & all of my clothes fit the best they have. My husband even asked if I was doing anything different, he said I looked really toned Makes me think that too much effort backfires for me & I’m better off with a looser, 3 meals a day, don’t worry about the rest approach. There’s less to rebel against when I don’t feel like I’m putting much effort in ;lol:

[automatedeating]

Jen - I was smiling so much reading your update! Great things going on for you!

My husband and I have lived in our ultra-suburban neighborhood of small track homes for 13 years. I've never entertained the thought of moving until just recently. It's funny how the thought just arrived in my head all at once, rather than a gradual build-up.

[pinkhippie]

Jen that is all so great! I know what you mean about more effort leading to more rebellion. Exercise always makes me more hungry too. I still am working on my relationship with exercise and trying to figure out what is best for me. It's so tricky! Sounds like you are really figuring it out.

I am sorry you dont' like where you live. We also live in ultra suburbs single tract housing and have been here for 13 years as well! But our neighborhood is so great. Our house is actually too small for our family but I love our neighborhood and don't want to leave. however, that can always change depending on who moves in around us. How come you don't like where you live?

[Jen1974]

Auto & Pink that’s how long we’ve lived here too. 13 years this month. That’s so funny we are all at the 13 year mark!! Pink your neighborhood sounds amazing. I have just the opposite problem, a house that I love & fits us well (with kids home, too big & lonely for just me & my husband) but our neighborhood isn’t the right vibe for me. Bigger nicer houses seems to me to produce nastier, shallow neighbors. I always say I’m a little bit hippy. I’m just not Botox, name brand, or competing over what school your kid goes to for college so I don’t fit in well here at all

[Jen1974]

I had so much fun at work yesterday!! I order accessories (rugs, lamps, art, etc) for a furniture company & have a small team who works with me & decorates. I just had a guy quit so I went in to help decorate. I forgot how much I like it!! I was really rusty at first but by the end seemed to find my groove. I came home & had office work though until 7:00 which meant no time to grocery shop. My kids all had plans so just me & my husband went to dinner. He loves Mexican food & my kids hate it so we got Mexican since it was just the two of us. I love the chips & salsa have realized that I’m best off enjoying those & just getting a side of rice/beans for dinner. It keeps me from getting too full & it’s what I’m always happiest with!! I would have eaten less at home, but a good enough day overall!! Lately my days have been heavy yellow but my weight is defiantly on the low end. I think that maybe what I think of as yellow is actually the best type of day for me, greens might be not quite enough food which eventually leads to overdoing it. I’m not really trying to get any smaller though. As tempting as it is to dream of 6 pack abs I know I would look about 10 years older if I got that skinny so I’m pretty happy where I am now!!

[pinkhippie]

How funny that we have all been in our houses about the same amount of time! I know what you are saying about the neighbors Jen. I sometimes am envious of our bigger house neighborhoods but I know that I also wouldn't fit in. I am definitely a little bit hippy. Hence the name.

That sounds like a good realization about the yellow days versus the green days. I feel like I have been having that realization lately too. I have to be careful to not eat too little, and I have a hard time telling when I have eaten too little, versus when I have eaten too much. It's such a balance!

Your job sounds fun! That is neat that you got to do some decorating.

[Jen1974]

Pink, LOL, didn’t even think about the hippie in your username!! Love that!!!

Big houses are overrated!! My kids all want a smaller house when they grow up & I feel like their whole generation will appreciate a smaller, simpler, way of living. Cozier houses have a way of feeling like home in a way bigger ones just don’t!!

[automatedeating]

Well, I'm glad you guys reminded me that if I could afford a nicer house I might think everybody is too snooty. LOL. Our neighborhood is definitely NOT like that! We are definitely salt of the earth here.

[pinkhippie]

Jen yes! I went with pink hippie back when I was cloth diapering. In some ways I am crunchy but in other ways, I am not, so its like a pink hippie rather than an earth-toned or burlap hippie.

I love small cozy spaces! It never occurred to me that a big house could feel less like a home, but given how much I love coziness I can see how that could be. I hope our kid's generation does appreciate smaller simpler ways of living. If we got rid of a LOT of clutter I know our house would feel bigger. My husband and I both have a really hard time getting rid of things. sigh...

[lpearlmom]

“ Makes me think that too much effort backfires for me & I’m better off with a looser, 3 meals a day, don’t worry about the rest approach. There’s less to rebel against when I don’t feel like I’m putting much effort in ;lol:”

Great observation. I definitely find that to be true too.

[Jen1974]

Auto/Pink: you have both confirmed what I always think!! Neighborhoods with smaller house have better people!!! All of my best friends live in neighborhoods like those & love their neighbors!!

Pink; I love how you came up with your username!! I’m like that too, some ways a little hippie and others not so much.

Linda: It’s crazy for me to look back & see the times I tried the hardest lead to the biggest backslides. It makes me sad for younger me who thought she had to work so hard and couldn’t see she was stuck in a loop, never getting anywhere!!

[Jen1974]

I finally made dinner at home last night It was funny with as much as I have known I need some healthier nights at home that my brain resisted & looked for reasons to either go out or get take out. Instead I cut up a ton of veggies & made Italian sandwiches & we ate on the patio which I love!!

I’ve been less hungry during the days & hungrier at night. I’ve kind of just gone with it & it seems to be working well for me. I feel like I have more energy during the day with lighter meals & I enjoy a bigger dinner at night. The one problem is that “lighter” has meant cutting out fruit/veggies that I add to meals. I love having fruit & veggies before dinner though & have decided to have things ready to put out before dinner if I’m getting hungry. My mom always did that so it’s a habit I developed early & when we’re home more I always do it too (my kids eat way more of those foods that way!!).

My first time with No S I didn’t let myself do that because “no snacks” & it was actually part of the reason I quit No S. It started seeming silly to tell myself no to fruits & veggies when I was physically hungry & honestly fruits & veggies were never what was causing weight gain!! So this time I consider fruits & veggies as part of the meal & only worry about non hunger snacking on less healthy foods.

We’re looking at an older used Jeep with low miles for my daughter today. It’s black which doesn’t seem girly enough but it’s a really good price for a car that was always garaged, never off roaded, and under 50,000 miles for a 2009. I drive a cute blue Jeep that I LOVE!! She doesn’t turn 15 until November but we have nothing she can learn to drive on. Our family car is gigantic & my car is a stick shift. Plus we figure we can pull her Jeep behind the motorhome & that way my kids will have a car they can drive when we travel (They haven’t leaned to drive stick yet)

[automatedeating]

That sounds fun about the car shopping.

I put out veggies and ranch mid-day and they all get eaten! Well, they sometimes leave the broccoli and celery, haha, and I end up eating those.

[pinkhippie]

Lots of interesting thoughts about fruits and veggies between meals. This is something I struggle with too. For example, often I eat fruit at a meal when I am already full because this is the only time that I will be able to have it. Or after dinner. I know the whole point is to cut down on other food to make room for the fruit or vegetable, and I understand that but I am not sure about it. I also notice that I have a very similar hunger pattern. Less hungry during the day but more hungry at night. It sounds like you are really figuring out what works for you. I always tell the kids that anytime they are hungry they can eat fruit or veggies.

Exciting about a jeep for your daughter! That sounds like a great idea and it will probably help encourage her to drive and get her license.

[Jen1974]

It’s the same at my house Auto where I’m the only one eating the broccoli

Pink I feel the same way on fruits & veggies!! And I always feel like I eat the same at meals regardless if I add fruits & veggies, they just end up being extra!!

[Jen1974]

We went out as a family to celebrate my sons graduation. I never got good pictures because we couldn’t all go to graduation so I made him put back on his gown before dinner & we gave him our cards/gifts after. I have an awesome crew & we always have so much fun together. The one nice thing about not making great friends in my neighborhood has been how much we do just us!!

I got a little more full than usual. I came home & had milk duds when I was already plenty full but everyone else was having dessert so I joined in.
Weight wise I feel like I’m about at the same point I was the first time I did No S where I got to a good weight for me but kept setting the bar higher. A night like last night where I had milk duds & got too full would of had me feeling guilty . I sometimes would like to be able to wear tighter shirts (my stomach is always the last place I lose weight) & get tempted to “be better” but that’s what I did wrong last time so this time I’m trying to just be happy where I’m at. I’ve also noticed that because I don’t consider anything a fail I also don’t feel like I need to “get it while I can”. I got a little extra full last night but not too full because so knew when I REALLY wanted milk duds again I’d have them. Where No S works better for me than IE though is in asking myself “Do I Need This Sweet, Snack, or Seconds? IE makes you feel like you need to have it whenever the smallest “I want it” thought occurs or it’s restrictive but with No S I find I am more selective which feels so much better!!

One thing I’m doing that also seems to help is that when I get hungrier or I eat a little more than enough I think of it as my body needing to know I’ll honor that & just enjoying it instead of trying to push through or eat the same amount every day. It has made it so that I don’t “throw in the towel” or try & make up for things later which is. It an enjoyable or sustainable way to live!!

[lpearlmom]

Really great stuff here. Im glad ypu caught yourself before you tried to push yourself to a lower goal weight. I do that too & it’s like im never going to be satisfied. I can remember reaching 118 in college which is really way to thin for my body amd my first thought was maybe I can get to 115. Like you said the key is sustainability. I want to think less about my weight, not more. With NoS i can kind of let go of weight expectations and get on with things. We really don’t have a lot of control over the scales so it makes sense to just focus on sticking to enjoyable, moderate habits instead that keep us from going too extreme in either direction. Anyway, not sure if that makes sense but you’re doing great!

[Jen1974]

I totally agree with you Linda!! And me too on the never happy no matter how low my weight was!! I actually think there is a sweet spot for me where I’m taking good care of myself without being obsessive & where I’m still enjoying food & life. My weight is never the lowest at this point but I’m no more happy with my weight when I get obsessive & my weight goes lower, but when I do that I quit enjoying food & life as much!!

[Jen1974]

Saturday my crew took our boat out & had dinner at Pearl Street in Boulder. Pearl Street feels like a vacation town!! Summer nights they have street performers & the weather was perfect so it was a fun night to be there!!

On our way to the reservoir, I still felt hungry after lunch so we stopped at DQ & I got the cherry dipped cone. It tasted waxy & so artificial, I think I’m ruined on it for life & it’s what I’ve ordered since I was little I do think when no foods are off limits you actually find that some things were only good when you “shouldn’t” have them!!

Last night we grilled chicken for sandwiches and set up a movie on the patio. We always do that in the summer but after watching a million movies during quarantine I haven’t felt like watching any this summer until now!! It was the perfect night weather wise!! I felt unmotivated to get it set up & almost bailed on it but I’m so glad I didn’t!! I notice a lot of times action comes before motivation and I need to work on doing things even when I don’t feel like it because once I start, the motivation seems to show up!!

Eating wise I wasn’t overly thrilled with the weekend but really it was good enough!! I had ice cream at a graduation party yesterday that I didn’t really want, milk duds while watching the movie that tasted good enough but I didn’t need, and got a little more full than necessary at dinners,. These are all the things where I let perfection creep in which never ends well so instead I’m reminding myself these things make No S sustainable!!

We’re heading to the cabin on Thursday & me & my 2 younger kids are meeting my parents for pizza on Wednesday when my husband’s out of town but at least I’m eating at home a few times this week!! My goal for this week is to have a little more strict glass ceiling for drinks & really focus on “no seconds”, especially at dinner, before getting a little too full becomes a habit!!

[pinkhippie]

I have the same thing with the lower weight. No matter what weight I am, I always secretly think 5 pounds less would be better. I think that is what happens when you live in a society that worships thinness, especially thinness in women.

I have had that happen before too where a favorite treat doesn't really taste that good once I stop feeling guilty for eating it. It's very momentous!

Sounds so fun to watch a movie on the patio! I have been working on the whole not getting too full at dinnertime habit as well. That is my trickiest time so far. I think because there are so many hours between the end of dinner and breakfast the next day.

[Jen1974]

Totally agree Pink!! And the media is so full of air brushed pictures of women with bodies that aren’t actually attainable!! I’ve really worked with my 14 year old daughter on recognizing that bodies are not supposed to look like that in real life & to always choose a happier live over a skinnier one!! I see it can be a struggle with her at time too where she’ll feel self conscious over her legs or stomach & she wears a size 2

[Jen1974]

On Monday we took the “neighbor kids” out on the boat with us & ordered pizza. They’re the kids my kids have been friends with the longest so I’m glad we got to do it before my oldest heads to college but I was sort of burnt out so it wasn’t as much fun as it would have been if it was spaced out more!!

Last night my husband was out of town on business so I got a chill night at home that felt great!! I pulled out a frisbee & played with my 16 year old. I’m trying to remember to be more present. I can get lazy about doing things like that but am always so much happier when I do!!

I’ve done a much better job of at stopping at enough!! At dinner I think I need to get a little more full than at breakfast or lunch & I’ve been doing that without overdoing it!! I’d consider both days green (for me blue is better) but know I’m better off there. Blue days just aren’t sustainable for how much effort they take & in the end I usually end up overdoing it at some point so they don’t really get me anywhere!!

My elliptical was finally fixed after 3 weeks of walking only & I have mixed feelings. My clothes have been getting looser even though we’ve been eating out & having more fun foods so I’m almost feeling like walking produces better results for me. Honestly I think elliptical makes me hungrier & I eat more than the calories burned. I like getting my heart rate up & having the endurance that elliptical brings though. I’ve debated only doing it after days where I get too full because I hate when I’m less hungry after those but don’t want it to feel like punishment either. I used to do 7 days a week, cut back to 5 & clothes fit a little better, and than couldn’t do it at all & had even better results so I’m not sure where to take it from here!!

My parents are here to empty their house they are selling. It’s the house I moved in to when I was 14 so my mom is having a hard time with it but they only spend about 2 weeks a year here so it’s kind of a waste!! I don’t feel sad about it, but mostly because it hasn’t been part of my present. My parents didn’t have family BBQs or holidays with the grandkids. As soon as me & my brother had kids they pretty much moved away & the house just sat vacant. I think I felt sad for a long time, I wanted my kids to be close to my parents & to see my brother & his kids more. Eventually I got over it though & now I’m really used to not having them around.

We go there tonight to go to dinner & I’ll grab a few things. They need me to empty out my room/stuff & there’s nothing that I want but I don’t want to hurt their feelings. I need to get stuff at my own house cleared out at this point!!I don’t need the shoes I dyed to match my prom dress in the mix

[pinkhippie]

It sounds like a lot is going on right now!

It's so great that you are figuring out how to stop at enough for dinner. I definitely think I need to be a little more full for dinner too. Being hungry all night is a terrible feeling. It sounds like blue days are unsustainable and it's great to realize that. What is that quote? "perfect is the enemy of good?" I think it applies here.

The elliptical thing is tough. I like having that cardio strength and endurance too. I also jump on the elliptical after I feel like I ate too much. It sounds like a dilemma with what to do about the elliptical though.

wow your house you lived in when you were 14 is still around? I can' t imagine what I would be cleaning out of my room! I am sorry your parents weren't involved in you and your brothers kids lives. It sounds sad that they had a house near you that they could have stayed in to see their grandkids and they didn't take advantage of it. I can see how you would be used to not having them around anymore now though. Does your brother live near you also or does he live far away?

[automatedeating]

Love the "chill at home" evening and the frisbee with your kiddo.

[Jen1974]

Pink-love “perfect is the enemy of good” it’s so true!! I’ve never exercised to make up for eating but only because I’ve always exercised probably too much where there wasn’t really room for more I feel like it’s probably just as bad for me as eating less to make up for more My brother lives a little over an hour away. We’re still close but I don’t see him as much as I wish I did!! He was at my parents last night & we always laugh so much when we’re together so I love seeing him!!

Auto: me too on the chill night at home!! I need more of those in my life

[Jen1974]

Yesterday went really good!! Light breakfast & lunch & an extra piece of pizza where physically I felt I could be done at 2 but didn’t feel mentally satisfied until I finished 3. I think that’s where diets fail, we’re constantly trying to eat the bare minimum instead of enough!!

I had fun with my kids at my parents. Seeing what I had saved made me want to start getting rid of more stuff. I thought of the “does it spark joy” from Marie Kando and realized I love old pictures but old things always seem sad. I had old letters from friends where it seemed sad that I lost touch where as old pictures of us all together make me happy. My daughter like trying on my old prom/homecoming dresses I probably about fit into them. That’s how well No S is working for me right now!! It was the same thing last time until I tried to make it more complicated than it should be.

When I was at my hair appointment yesterday I read through my old posts for the second time since I restarted. I self sabotage every time I make N days something too strict!! N days are best for me when I’m not worried about what I’m eating as much as 3 balanced meals a day & not getting overly full. When I start to think I’m eating out too much or add in any judgment to a day that is a successful N day or when I think I need to tighten up N days if I have bigger than normal S days it’s when I end up backsliding!!

[automatedeating]

I self sabotage every time I make N days something too strict!!

Really great that you can see this pattern. I truly feel that long-time successful NoSers are people that are willing to experiment with what works for them personally, and somehow not judge themselves so much, but just collect the data and keep trying new things.

[Jen1974]

I think you’re totally right Auto!! I think we’re all different too, more strict works better for some, less strict works better for others. I think the ones this works the best for are making No S fit them instead of making themselves fit No S

[pinkhippie]

Interesting realization about what sparks joy or makes you sad. I haven't actually used that on any of my memorabilia.

I totally agree with auto about the successful no sers being willing to experiment and not be too strict. That is what I have noticed too. It's great that you had that observation!

[automatedeating]

I think the ones this works the best for are making No S fit them instead of making themselves fit No S

Yes, yes, yes! This is what I was trying to say, but you articulated it perfectly!

[Jen1974]

The cabin has been really fun but not enough time!! We go home today The first night we rode bikes to dinner which is my favorite!! We have headlights & tail lights for when it gets dark & riding home after dinner eliminates any sleepiness from food

My brother & 2 of his kids came & stayed last night which was so much fun!! He brought old videos from my parents house that were funny to watch!! We ordered Chinese & I was really hungry & ate a lot!! My daughter made snicker-doodles & I had one more of those than was needed but didn’t get too full so I was happy enough with the day!! I was amazed by how hungry I was. I’ve been doing elliptical which does make me hungrier. Plus I think that time if the month is causing a little of it too.

As for elliptical I’m going to try every other day when I can & no more than 3 times a week. I either do elliptical for 30 minutes or walk for 60 so I can’t think the elliptical burns that many more calories!! I’ve been wondering if too much elliptical with all the other movement I get in a day (I walk my dog & bike some too) is just too much. I have friends who run marathons & 1/2 marathons & complain that they move so much but tend to gain weight. I feel like maybe extra hunger leads to eating more than calories burned & for me puts me at the higher end of my set point weight. It’s funny if that is true because I’ve spent YEARS thinking that all the working out I was doing was helping Plus it just feels better now to be doing less!!

We’re driving through Rocky Mountain National Park on our way home & eating Lunch in Estes Park which will be fun. We’re trying to see how many National Parks we can see this year with COVID

[pinkhippie]

It seems like you are really active. I am amazed that you were were able to do your elliptical so many days a week. I have an elliptical too and it is pretty intense! I always find that according to my fitbit it gets my heart rate way up even when I don't feel like it is. I see you were doing it 7 days a week and then 5. I have read that sometimes our bodies get overstressed from too much exercise and we can actually hold onto extra weight because our body is protecting itself. If that is true, could that be what has been happening to you in the past? If your body feels better doing less, maybe it is telling you that it needs less for now? I think the 3 days per week sounds like it might work well for you.

Sounds so fun to ride bikes to dinner! I love doing things like that!

Have fun at Rocky Mountain National Park!

[Jen1974]

I think you are totally right Pink!! I think working out too much came from my calorie counting days where it felt like I had to eat less if I skipped it & never felt like eating less. So sad that the real truth was that it doesn’t actually work that way at all!!!

[Jen1974]

Life has been chaos with my parents moving & my son getting ready for college!! I have been crying at the drop of a hat so I hope I can keep it together tomorrow when we drop him off. I’m so excited for him & know he’s so ready for this but still the thought of not having him home for dinner feels awful!!

We did breakfast burritos & donuts for our “last” Sunday morning/watching church before Jack heads to college & I was STARVING so it all tasted awesome. Sometimes I’m not that hungry for breakfast so I loved that this time I was!! I had 2 donuts & never got too full but did feel sluggish the rest of the day. Better fuel just leaves me feeling better!!

We went to dinner with my parents after getting through a lot of their house. I left their house wanting to get rid of things. The stuff there is unorganized. Everything I saved just smelled gross & seemed sad. Letters from old friends I’d read a little of but honestly just don’t want to waste time in the past!! I’d rather enjoy the present!! So I started throwing out everything & now I want to do it at my house. My kids were so grossed out by things!! My parents don’t spend time at that house so it really has just sat & collected dust/smells. There was a canned good that was so old that it had disintegrated & there was black mold all in the cabinet. It really proved how badly the house needed to be cleaned out & sold!!

I’m making this sausage tortellini tonight for our “last” dinner before we take our oldest to college. It’s not the healthiest but it’s his favorite!! I’m so ready for a little healthier meals!! I’m ready for a bit of a slow down but for a while this will be my normal, with a lot going on!! I need to find ways to squeeze in healthier even though!!

[automatedeating]

Hugs to you during this time of transition, Jen! You have so much going on; your love for your family really shines through.

[Soprano]

Hugs Jen, their time away passes so fast but it is difficult the day they go.

Jx

[Jen1974]

Thanks Soprano & Auto

I was a total mess getting ready to leave this morning. I knew I’d struggle but surpassed my expectations on how poorly I’d handle it the good news was once we got there I did pretty well!! Up until he gave me a big hug goodbye at least!!

Last night I made sausage tortellini & ice cream pie. I wasn’t hungry for the pie at all but had it because everyone else was. I actually ate the ice cream that was left after I made it in the late afternoon which tasted awesome & was well worth the S, but after dinner I wasn’t hungry enough or really craving sweet anymore & would have rather skipped it. There’s just times when it feels a little lame not to be part of the fun though & that was one of them!!

I’ve been a bit off since last Friday. Hungrier but pushing the limits of full beyond that. I think my oldest headed to college is a lot for me!! I’m hoping that now that we’ve dropped him off things will feel easier!! I really hate the looming feeling where the drop off day just gets closer & closer. Last night when I hugged all my kids before bed I totally lost it thinking he won’t be here to hug goodnight. I’m ready to move on from this low key sadness that lingers in the days/weeks leading up to taking him!!

Plus I think I’m catastrophizing it all a little!! We go up next Monday for his birthday & I love the town he’ll be in!! I’m sure we’ll see him often & it will be extra fun when we do!! Today we had lunch at my most favorite sandwich shop. Me & my husband both went to school there too & we always eat there when we go back. I’m actually excited to have an excuse to get there more!! He’s also coming home at Thanksgiving & they finish classes online at that point. It’s kind of an easier year to send him since he’ll be home more than an average year!!

My daughter is having a friend spend the night & my son has a tennis team dinner so it’s looking like date night for me & DH. Although it’s tempting to crawl into bed early & sleep instead. I’ve slept terrible the last 2 nights & am hoping this day being over will mean a good night sleep!!

[automatedeating]

I sure hope you do get a good night's sleep after all the emotional experiences you've been through. After reading your entry, I'm going to extra hug my boys tonight at bedtime.

How far away is he? I'm glad that it is drivable distance. I'm also pleasantly surprised that he actually gets to go to campus....

[pinkhippie]

Aww big hugs Jen! I can only imagine how emotional I would feel if my oldest went to college. I burst into tears if I even really think for very long about how she is 17 now and remember when she was my baby, so I imagine when she moves out or goes to college it will be very intense.

It's totally understandable that your eating would be a little off. Mine always goes off when big emotional things are happening. Just keep taking care of yourself. I hope you got some good sleep last night!

[lpearlmom]

Oh hugs Jen! I got teary eyed reading about your drop off. That’ll be me next year. It’s bittersweet I’m sure. Excited and proud and sad at the same time. It’s a big milestone for both of you. I know my friend went through this last year and it took a few months for the blue feeling to lift but now she’s fine. Of course that was her last child going off so I imagine the empty nest feeling must be harder.

Anyway, very cool that you like the college town. Visiting will be a lot of fun.

[Jen1974]

Thanks everyone!! I love that this board is about so much more than just food

[Jen1974]

Since dropping my son off I’ve watched myself recover. It’s always amazing to see how bad feelings just don’t last & soon enough I always rise back up. He’s having a great time & texts quite a few times a day which has been fun to get updates.

It’s that time of the month which this month has meant a lot of extra hunger!! I’ve gotten pretty good at dealing with it but it does make things more challenging, especially when combined with a little sadness about my oldest. Yesterday I had extra at lunch but still didn’t feel done & had a sucker & Milk Duds after. Food just tastes better when I’m extra hungry & makes it harder to stop!!

Last night went & helped my parents move one last time & went out for pizza again. It’s lucky I like pizza because so feel like we’ve been eating it constantly!! It used to be something I’d always overdo. In college I LOVED pizza with ranch but at some point banned ranch & hardly ever had pizza which of course meant I over did it on pizza when I did. Now I can eat it whenever, always have it with ranch, and never overdo it. I did so many things to lose weight but looking back it seems like it all was more likely to lead to weight gain when I’d binge on forbidden foods & I was thinner & happier without the rules!!

The company I work for is opening a new store & tomorrow we move down in our motorhome to help open. It will be a week strait of mostly take out & non stop work plus a social aspect of drinks at night with my team. We bring in extras & try to make it fun. My kids were small the last time we did one & played in the store while we worked but this time will be helping. It will be fun but I really miss home cooked food & better self care that happens when life is a little calmer!!

[pinkhippie]

It's great that you are recovering and able to stay in touch with your son.

I know what you mean about that extra hunger! However, if things taste extra good to you, then I assume its physical hunger and your body needs it right?

We have pizza SOOOO much! My husband has eating issues and pizza is one of his foods. It has to be specially made of course, but he is a pizza lover. Before him I had pizza a few times a year. Now it is pretty much once a week or sometimes twice a week. That is great that you have been able to go back to eating pizza with peace.

Sounds fun opening a new store! Lots of work and a bit of a change in routine but fun. That is great that your kids are old enough to help and that you get to do it with your family. It seems like this summer you have gotten really good at maintaining self care even when you are on vacation or out of your normal routine.

[Jen1974]

Pink I was doing really well with habits even during busy times & vacation but have really struggled the past week with adding in PMS, not sleeping well, and adjusting to my son’s move to college It’s crazy how old habits come back during difficult times. I used to think it was lack of willpower or that what ever diet/plan I was trying wasn’t working, when it really was always just my bodies way of trying to feel better!!

[Jen1974]

The past week I have really struggled with my No S habits. I’m sure once PMS passes & I get better sleep things will be better again but yesterday I realized I just didn’t have it in me to say no to milk duds after lunch even though I knew I’d feel worse for having them mid-day. Too much processed/high glycemic foods during the day leaves me craving more from feeling sluggish after!! But I was tired & feeling unmotivated & didn’t have it in me to make better choices

I’m ready for better self care & hope today I’m feeling more motivated!! It’s easy to get stuck adding in adding in sweets, seconds, and snacks and doesn’t help build the habit of making better choices!! At the same time I also know I won’t always feel tired & PMSy & that it’s a heck of a lot easier to make better choices when I’m feeling better!!

[automatedeating]

It’s always amazing to see how bad feelings just don’t last & soon enough I always rise back up.

Love this!

[pinkhippie]

I used to think it was lack of willpower or that what ever diet/plan I was trying wasn’t working, when it really was always just my bodies way of trying to feel better!!

This is so true! I have realized this especially recently. I think for me in terms of exercise.

I know in times of stress our old habits come roaring back with a vengeance. I think just staying aware like you have been and not beating yourself up when you recognize that you don't have it in you to resist is great! I think being gentle with yourself and reminding yourself that your good habits make you feel better the way that you have been will keep leading you to making more good choices for your body.

[Octavia]

Hi Jen,
Really enjoying reading your thread, and I so relate to your feelings about your DS going off to college. My DD is going in 2 weeks’ time. I keep noticing how, in the normal state of things, she is up in her room or pottering around...and yet soon that room will be empty. The poignant realisation ‘she is there’ keeps getting me... realising with greater clarity than before that this long, long phase of parenting is passing, and soon she will not be there. DH keeps reminding me that of course she will still need us, she will be back...but as I see it, this 18-year period of our lives is about to be over and I feel it’s better to be aware of that, even if it hurts. Ahhh! I hope my DD keeps in touch as much as your DS.

[Jen1974]

Thanks Octavia!! It’s nice to know others are in my same boat I hope the transition is smooth for you. I notice I’m still not quite myself. I figure it’s normal to have a period where I’ll feel a little sad getting used to the new normal without him here but I’m hoping it will pass soon!!

[Jen1974]

The new store was such chaos that I barely had time to shower so I wasn’t able to post at all. I was working 8:30 am to 10:30 pm most days & eating was more survival based. I didn’t eat well at all, mostly take out, and was too tired to care what/how much I was eating most of the time. I was getting close to 40,000 steps in a day & hungrier but still think I ate more than was needed & came home feeling blah. Old Jen would call this “feeling fat” but I’ve realized it has more to do with self care than weight gain. When I don't take care of myself my clothes don’t feel right & my skin & hair just feel off so I end up not feeling great about myself at all!! We finished on Friday & I’ve had SO MUCH to do getting home but finally today I feel like the fog is lifting after eating a little healthier & getting more sleep. Me & my husband have a “date” camping trip this week that I’m going to try & keep healthier. It just doesn’t feel good to make too many unhealthy choices & I’m really motivated right now to take better care of myself!! Just adding in water & a few fruits/veggies makes a huge difference. And honestly I think sleep makes the biggest difference. When I’m sleep deprived I just doing have it in me to make healthy choices!

[pinkhippie]

Holy Busy! Is that normal when you are opening a store? I imagine it is an unbelievable amount of work, but wow.

Thats a great realization about how feeling fat is really just not taking care of yourself. I think its exactly the same for me too.

I am glad you have caught up on sleep!

[automatedeating]

Sleep is so important. I don't think we can really overstate its importance!

[Soprano]

So agree with auto re sleep

Jx

[Jen1974]

I have had the hardest time finding time to check in. Me & my husband went camping last week just the two of us which was so much fun!! Our spot was on a lake & we bought paddle boards to bring which was amazing. I have never paddle boarded much before & liked it even more than I thought I would!!

We got home on Friday & picked the kids up to head back to the store for the weekend. I’m really happy to have that behind us! My hours weren’t as bad but it still was a lot of work & we came home on Sunday night exhausted.

No S is the perfect “diet” for busy times & the 3 meal structure works great but I’ve noticed through all this business that when I’m overwhelmed or tired I eat more than I need to. It’s just my bodies way of trying to feel better!! And it’s not the eating that needs to be fixed, it’s life that does what that happens. Younger Jen always tried to fix the eating but that only made things harder! When instead I fix what I can with better sleep & taking some pressure off my eating improves on its own!!

The other takeaway from this busy time is that eating better feels better but perfect eating isn’t necessary!! I really don’t need to eat perfectly to feel good & less perfect eating is much more sustainable.

And the final takeaway is that it doesn’t actually work to control my body with less food & more exercise. When instead I try, without trying too hard, my body ends up where it’s happiest with more hunger on one end & less on another. However if I choose to mostly eat foods that are “empty” and don’t offer much more than taste, my body can’t register when it’s had enough & I end up overeating. It’s not that I can’t include those foods but I’m better off including them with a balanced meal & sticking to the “no seconds” rule on them!!

I’m hoping to be back more that the store opening is done!! I missed being around!!

[Whosonfirst]

I have had the hardest time finding time to check in. Me & my husband went camping last week just the two of us which was so much fun!! Our spot was on a lake & we bought paddle boards to bring which was amazing. I have never paddle boarded much before & liked it even more than I thought I would!!

We got home on Friday & picked the kids up to head back to the store for the weekend. I’m really happy to have that behind us! My hours weren’t as bad but it still was a lot of work & we came home on Sunday night exhausted.

No S is the perfect “diet” for busy times & the 3 meal structure works great but I’ve noticed through all this business that when I’m overwhelmed or tired I eat more than I need to. It’s just my bodies way of trying to feel better!! And it’s not the eating that needs to be fixed, it’s life that does what that happens. Younger Jen always tried to fix the eating but that only made things harder! When instead I fix what I can with better sleep & taking some pressure off my eating improves on its own!!

The other takeaway from this busy time is that eating better feels better but perfect eating isn’t necessary!! I really don’t need to eat perfectly to feel good & less perfect eating is much more sustainable.

And the final takeaway is that it doesn’t actually work to control my body with less food & more exercise. When instead I try, without trying too hard, my body ends up where it’s happiest with more hunger on one end & less on another. However if I choose to mostly eat foods that are “empty” and don’t offer much more than taste, my body can’t register when it’s had enough & I end up overeating. It’s not that I can’t include those foods but I’m better off including them with a balanced meal & sticking to the “no seconds” rule on them!!

I’m hoping to be back more that the store opening is done!! I missed being around!!

Congrats on the new store!

[automatedeating]

Younger Jen always tried to fix the eating but that only made things harder! When instead I fix what I can with better sleep & taking some pressure off my eating improves on its own!!

so insightful!

sounds like things are going well but are busy and life is demanding! I hope you are able to prioritize the sleep and rest, as I know you want to do. Take care!

[pinkhippie]

I hope things slow down for you a bit soon, but it sounds like you have hit the nail on the head re self care. I really agree with you about taking care of yourself and then your eating improves on its own. I have seen that this past couple of weeks myself as they have been so stressful. Obsessing over and about food and trying to limit food is not good self care for me. Sleep and relaxation time is.

I also totally agree about the perfect eating! This is something I have really struggled a lot with and am just now beginning to realize. Perfect eating isn't necessary! Amazing!

Your camping trip with your husband sounds so fun! It's so neat that you guys got to do that!

[Jen1974]

Obsessing over and about food and trying to limit food is not good self care for me. Sleep and relaxation time is.

Love this Pink!!

[Jen1974]

Yesterday I just fell apart I think overworking myself caught up to me & I needed a day off but never allow myself to have those. It snowed here which made me feel like doing nothing but instead I spent the day working & getting stuff done & by late afternoon was looking for a little relief & ate food I KNEW I wasn’t hungry enough for. Taking a day off feels impossible to me. Since having kids I feel I must use ever minute wisely & have given up things I used to love like reading or having a show I watch.

I know I need to learn how to relax again but it just feels uncomfortable anymore. Last night I did climb into bed & watched a show with my daughter which felt great but I need to give myself permission to do those things before 9:00 at night

[Jen1974]

Much better day yesterday!! I wasn’t hungry after too much the day before but did a pretty good job honoring that. Skipping meals never feels right to me but I kept meals fairly light. Chances are I won’t be that hungry for a bit here. I’d assume my weight crept Up slightly during the store opening which always leads to less hunger. Younger Jen just thought I had more will power at the beginning of diets

[Jen1974]

It feels good to be getting back to more normal again!! Yesterday eating felt great! I’m laying low on fruit for a bit at breakfast & lunch. It’s one of those things I feel I should add but never really satisfies me as much as other foods do at those meals. I really like fruits & veggies but never crave them at those meals & they are always more of something I feel I should have. For a while I tried skipping them but feel like some of the time it wasn’t enough food for me without, so now I’m just going to see how it works if I add in what I want on days I need it. I think things you “should” eat just don’t satisfy you the way things you want to eat do

Before dinner is when I crave fruits & veggies (I consider this part of dinner & not a snack) so I’m just going with that. And on days where I’m less hungry & don’t want them before dinner I’ll just go with that too I’m curious if I base my diet more on foods that nourish my body but that I also crave/want if I’ll have less moments in life where I feel I need to reward myself with food or a day off from trying. My goal is really just to eat good enough everyday & enjoy it.

I got back to 5 days of elliptical this week & that is going to be my ceiling. We’ll see how it goes hunger wise at that pace but this week it’s felt pretty good & I’m looking to being “off” for the weekend.

My husband is off on a guys trip & me & my 2 youngest are headed up to spend the weekend at the cabin which I’m excited about!! I’m making grilled cheese tonight. I have my dinners that I do with it’s just me & the kids that we all like but my husband doesn’t as much

[Jen1974]

I signed up to test an app called Wavelength when they were doing trials of it. I loved so much of what it focused on, all except for the food part, but yesterday I realized I missed some of the things I did when I was using the app. So I joined for a month to work on some of the habits again. Small things like breathing before meals, & doing things that make me feel better like living in a more tidy environment and a little more attention to doing things like showering & getting ready each day instead of getting stuck showering at the end of the day & never really getting myself ready (the downside to working at home )

My eating is always so much better when I’m feeling good so that’s where I’m going to focus, on just feeling my best. No S usually helps me make better choices, but I’d rather not feel stuck in a tug of war with myself & eat & move on vs. arguing with the small voice in my head that is tempted to use food & drinks to feel better when I’m feeling off!!

Yesterday was great!! I made breakfast bagels for the 3 of us but then wasn’t hungry at lunch & realized I really just wanted a brownie & so I just had that I got the cabin cleaned up & took the sunroof off of my jeep which made going to the grocery store feel more fun I walked my dog while my kids played tennis & than stopped & watched my kids play which sometimes I can forget to do, always feeling like I should be accomplishing something more. I made fondue for dinner which is my kids favorite & made for a fun dinner although I’m not as excited by steak as they are. I was plenty full but warmed up a leftover brownie & had it with ice cream which was amazing after. More food than needed but those days always leave me excited for more normal light days so no regrets!!

[automatedeating]

You sure are an amazing mom. You inspire me!

[April]

Jen, I read your "opening statement" this morning for this thread. I am so thankful for reading these kinds of stories, it makes me (and countless others) feel we are not alone and that we all have SO much in common. I resonate so much with a lot of what you had to say. I have a similar mod, 3 meals a day (anything allowed on my plate) 7 days a week, virtual-plater, and allow THREE S-Events a week (instead of weekend S-days). I too, have been down the IE road, it helped with anxiety around food, but also just was not enough to move the scale. IE also seemed to make my choices less healthy over time, where No-S naturally makes me crave healthier foods more often.

Also, I have to say you truly have a gift for quality writing - I bet you are a high level executive, business owner, or maybe even an author...

I look forward to following your journey on this thread! I recently read on one of so many self improvement books/blogs that it is very beneficial to surround yourself with like-minded people, especially when you have a goal to reach. So again, thank you for sharing and keep posting!

[Jen1974]

Thanks Auto!! That’s really nice of you to say!! I don’t always feel like it & always think of all the things I should be doing better

[Jen1974]

April, your post totally made my day!! Thank you so much!! I’m so glad what I say resonates! That’s what I love about this bored, it seems so many of us are in such a similar place! I so agree that with IE my diet was getting progressively less healthy where with No S I care more about feeling good & taking better care of myself instead of only worrying about “what I most want” but I also like that with No S there’s room for what I most want

[pinkhippie]

I totally resonate with your observations as well. Especially the whole idea of higher weight equals less hunger, thinking you have more willpower at the beginning of the diet. It's so true! At a lower weight, I eat MORE than I did when I was trying to lose weight because I am way hungrier.

I also just had a chocolate baked good for a meal this weekend, only mine was chocolate cake for dinner.

Wavelength sounds interesting! I am glad it helps you focus on good habits and self-care. I have been using my bullet journal for a lot of that because I LOVE notebooks, pens, writing, analog everything.

[Jen1974]

Thanks Pink (: I think a bullet journal is such an awesome form of self care. There’s just something good for the soul about being creative & actually writing!! I keep thinking one of these days I’m going to start one

[Jen1974]

One of the things Wavelength had me do was write out non-weight related goals for eating in a way that feels better. For me I just want to stop pushing the limits of full so that I’m hungrier for my meals. I am someone who is always tempted to have just a little more than what I actually need, but it feels so much better to honor enough. I’m also someone who struggles to wait to be hungry enough to eat, especially on a day where I’m mostly working from home!! As soon as the first sign of hunger shows up I have a hard time being patient but it usually takes about an hour to be hungry enough to eat after that. Food is so much more enjoyable when I wait for hunger & I have so much more energy when I stop at enough so that is my non-weight related goal. Having that fresh in my mind has made it so much easier to wait for hunger & stop at enough today. I’m sure it won’t last, I’m pretty sure I’ve already written about this goal in my thread, so it’s not a new goal, but I am going to work on keeping that more front & center in my mind.

There is also a lot on being more compassionate to yourself & how beating yourself up is scientifically proven not to work. That those who make mistakes, give themselves a little grace, & learn from them are so much more successful than those who just beat themselves up over choices. On a day where I’m feeling good the “right” choice is almost effortless to make, but it’s when I’m tired, bored, stressed, or just feeling meh that it’s harder.

Today is one of those days where I feel good & things are easy though so I’m going to enjoy it!!

[automatedeating]

Pinkie said -

I have been using my bullet journal for a lot of that because I LOVE notebooks, pens, writing, analog everything.

Sometimes I think I could start a forum just on office supplies.

[pinkhippie]

Jen yes I love journalling! It does feel good to physically write stuff down and its great handwriting practice! My handwriting was abysmal before I got back into it.

Auto, Oh yes... Office supplies *wipes drool* I love office supplies! I had to make a pretend store for my PHP class last year and I made an office supply stationary store.

I think I said this upthread Jen, but I really struggle with waiting to be hungry enough vs whoops way too hungry and now I am feeling deprived and eating and eating. The balance is so hard for me to find. I have noticed its about an hour after the first wisp of hunger shows up for me too, to really be hungry.

I am glad you are having an enjoyable, easy day!

[lpearlmom]

So do you have basic set times when you eat your meals or do you wait to eat your meals till you’re a good amount of hungry? I find that if I eat around the same times each day, my body gets used to that schedule and starts to be hungry for meals at those times. Sometimes I might have to eat on the schedule for a few days first.

Also, are you eating too much because you’re putting too much on your plate and then can’t help but eat it all or are you going for 2nds because you still want more? Sometimes it takes awhile to get the right amount on your plate to be satisfied but not stuffed. But I pretty much resign myself to the fact that I’m going to eat everything I put on my plate. I think it’s asking a lot to do otherwise. If it’s too much or too little, I kind of make a note of it for next time.

Anyway, I sure have a lot of advice for someone that hasn’t even really been doing NoS in awhile.

[Jen1974]

I was thinking about your post & realized I do better with more set meal times but I’ve adopted a range that might be making it harder to wait for hunger!! 10 & 3 are the times when I feel hungry for breakfast & lunch but I shoot for 9-10 & 2-3.

As far as pushing the limits of enough it’s not that I get too full. The thing that lets me know I’m doing it is that I’m not hungry for my next meal. It’s probably the range I have with how I plate where I’ll have X & Y and if I’m still hungry add in Z. Some days I really am hungry enough for Z but days when I’m not it’s not always easy to skip. I do feel so much more energized during the day with lighter meals but it’s a double edged sword where if I skip Z every day, eventually it seems to catch up to me & I feel deprived.

So many of these issues I swear were caused by diets!! If I had never forced myself to under-eat I wouldn't have to be so careful not to feel deprived!! Restricting my food & trying to manipulate my body to be smaller than it was meant to be really hurt my relationship with food!!

[Octavia]

Pinkie said -

I have been using my bullet journal for a lot of that because I LOVE notebooks, pens, writing, analog everything.

Sometimes I think I could start a forum just on office supplies.

That would be a brilliant forum, and I would definitely contribute! In my Amazon shopping basket right now is a gift set of bic multicoloured biros! I love them! Check this out:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07GS3WQMS/ ... yFbVN07K6N

When I write in my journal, I use cheap, lightweight cartridge pens which I fill with different coloured inks! And I like those Peter Pauper notebooks you can get on Amazon. Simply mad about stationary!

Back on topic though and I do think journaling is very helpful in life and mood management. This Wavelength app sounds very interesting, thanks for mentioning it, Jen. I too feel that dieting caused many of my bad habits. After I did the Hip and Thigh diet, my fixation with chocolate and other fatty foods definitely increased, became more compulsive and insidious.

[Jen1974]

Things have been going really well for me!! Doing the wavelength app has a good effect on me. It’s focus is being kind to yourself which leaves you feeling better & for me when I feel better I make better choices!!

I’ve made my breakfast smaller lately which has worked really well. I don’t wake up that hungry but skipping breakfast i.e. “intermittent fasting” really messed with my hormones when I tried it in the past & left me feeling so moody!! Smaller leaves me hungrier at lunch & dinner though which works better for me!!

There was a day this week where I was really tired after not sleeping well which always makes me want to eat. Wavelength talks about how low sleep leads to more eating impulses (wanting to eat when not hungry). The difference with Wavelength is that the response is less guilt/pressure to get more sleep and more compassion “no wonder I’m tempted to eat” and permission to eat. This week it seemed to help just accepting that I wanted to eat, my body was just trying to help & get some extra energy, & I realized it wouldn’t solve my problem & chose not to.

The goal is to reduce eating impulses & give you tools for when they happen but they aren’t your normal tools. There’s a focus on guilt free rest, showering & taking care of your physical needs, and creating a relaxing environment but low pressure to do it perfectly & instead its just doing the bare minimum you can with zero guilt when you can’t. The thing I don’t like is the price & wish it was cheaper because I really do love the app!!

We’re spending the weekend at the cabin again which I love!! The leaves are all changing. I love Colorado & all the seasons and especially love being in the mountains!!

[automatedeating]

So great that your family has made such frequent use of your cabin this summer! I love reading about how often you guys "head for the hills". Seems like it really helps "reset" you mentally and in your relationships with hubby and kids.

[Jen1974]

I love working at the cabin!! Yesterday I took my computer on the deck & worked while my kids did online school. It felt so much less like work in that environment!!

We love our cabin but it’s a little small so we’re in the process of building a bigger place. We plan to be here even more once our kids all go to college & wanted a place for that & also for our kids to visit with friends. My son brings his group of friends to the cabin now which is so much fun, but it gets tight quickly, especially with a small kitchen. I want my kids all to bring friends & come visit with their families someday so we’re building a place that will work well for that & also be a great place for us to live & have friends come & stay.

They have it framed it & we walked through it just before sunset last night which was so much fun!! I planned most of it & it’s crazy to see it come to life. When I went to college I wanted to be an architect but the school l went to didn’t offer that & I didn’t want to transfer. I can tell from how much I loved drawing this house out that I would have loved it, but also realize that I would have never met my husband had I transferred so I’m pretty glad I never did

For me I stick to the No S habits all 7 days but I usually take more S events on weekends. One thing I don’t love about weekends is that my brain looks for more rewards & will try & convince me to add a dessert to lunch or a snack between lunch & dinner. I don’t like the results I get when I do those things, not hungry enough for dinner with a snack & on a bit of a blood sugar roller coaster with dessert, where it seems to create cravings for sweets the rest of the day. I’m better off saving dessert for after dinner & skipping snacks all together. Yesterday when I got the urge to grab a dessert after lunch I decided to wait & let it pass. I used it as a bit of an experiment trying things from Wavelength like guilt free rest after lunch where I had tea & sat on the deck scrolling Instagram & reading the No S board, tidying up the cabin after, and finally getting out & walking while I talked to my oldest son on the phone. That was what seemed to do it & the urge for a sweet was completely gone after that & I never felt an urge for a snack. For me the urge for seconds, snacks, or sweets I know I don’t need can feel like it won’t leave without giving in, but it actually works the other way around. Giving in usually just causes urges to keep happening where as waiting it out meant it was gone for good!!

I did enjoy seconds at dinner though, we ordered Chinese & I’m obsessed with Sesame Chicken right now Overall a good weekend day where I enjoyed extra but in a way that felt better!!

[ladybird30]

Good on you for waiting the urge out.

[Jen1974]

Thanks ladybird it felt a lot better to make that choice!!

[Jen1974]

Yesterday wasn’t my favorite day in the mountains!! I wanted to go hiking & was trying to be patient & let my family sleep in but by 11 when everyone was dragging their feet & no one was helping at all get ready & leaving everything up to me to do I lost it. I don’t like forcing my family on hikes but it feels like if I left what we did up to them we’d spend the day sitting on the couch with the TV on while everyone stared at their phones. Sometimes it turns out awesome when I put pressure on us to go do something but yesterday was not one of those days!! The drive to the hike was long & the roads were bad. There had been a storm with hurricane level winds & trees were down on the path so we eventually had to turn back. My crew made the best of it once we were there but I wish we had stayed closer to home

My oldest son called & was a little over his roommate & doing the same thing every weekend so I told him to come home & we’d meet him there. It cut my cabin time short but it was worth it to have him home!!

Yesterday it was even easier to skip something sweet after lunch. I may work to keeping sweets to after dinner on the weekend. I think when I don’t expect a sweet, like during the week, I don’t have to deal with the “should I, shouldn’t I” tug of war in my head!! Plus I really don’t like the results I get having sweets earlier in the day. I feel better & am more energized on days where I don’t & really hate weekends where I’m dragging through the day in a food coma!!

[oolala53]

Giving in usually just causes urges to keep happening where as waiting it out meant it was gone for good!!

Ain't that sumpin?

[Octavia]

...the food coma....I know that feeling. Starting on sweet treats early on an S day is something I’m learning to avoid too!

[Jen1974]

Giving in usually just causes urges to keep happening where as waiting it out meant it was gone for good!!

Ain't that sumpin?

Right Oolala now to just get the little voice that “wants it now” to always remember this!!

Octavia, you & me both!! I’m finally feeling like it’s sinking in for me though, it only took 45 years

[Jen1974]

Since my son was home on Sunday, we got breakfast & donuts to have while we watched church. The breakfast burritos were just meh so I only had 1/2 but the apple fritter was amazing & I ate more than I needed. I did notice when it quit tasting good & stopped before getting uncomfortably full which I was proud of. Old Jen would have considered donuts/breakfast burritos a cheat day & overdone it vowing to “be better” on Monday. It’s a big reason why I don’t take traditional S days, it’s too similar to cheat days for me!

I wasn’t hungry after that & missed lunch (we ate breakfast late so it was more of a brunch) & still wasn’t feeling all that hungry at dinner so I made Chicken Caesar salads which was tasted great & was perfect after such a heavy breakfast.

Yesterday I was much hungrier after a salad only dinner which was great because me & my daughter went to bagels for breakfast & picked up Chick-Fil-A for lunch after shopping & it all tasted amazing!!

I met girlfriends for Margs/dinner last night & could tell I had no interest in the chips like I usually do. I had eaten enough food I really enjoyed during the day & didn’t need the chips. In wavelength they have you ask “since I can have this food anytime do I really want it now” to get back in touch with you body instead of letting the inner diet rebel run the show. Thinking of that helped me know I didn’t really want the chips

[pinkhippie]

Octavia, love those pens! I have always been a huge fan of the four color pens, that set looks amazing.

Jen, sounds like you have been doing such a good job listening to yourself, and not your inner diet rebel.

Also, I know how it is when you force the family to go hike or something and it turns out... not so great. And then they all come home crying saying they never want to go hiking again. ooops. Sorry your hike didn't work out the way you were hoping.

[Jen1974]

We have been traveling while we do work/school since last Friday which has left me with no time to post. I’m definitely off with eating. The good news is that 3 meals a day is pretty solid but I’ve noticed default for me is pushing the limits of enough & eating in a way that doesn’t leave me feeling my best. It’s why intuitive eating didn’t work for me. I take better care of myself when I’m more intentional. Auto pilot has me eating more sweets, pushing the limits of enough, and filling up before dinner on apps but still wanting dinner. My jeans have started to get tighter so auto pilot doesn’t work great for me

I think one of the biggest factors was when my oldest tested positive for COVID. He was meeting us for part of the trip & had to cancel which was disappointing, but the worst part was that it felt wrong to be on a trip while he was home sick. Going home would have meant he needed to be confined to his room & the rest of us would need to quarantine as well so that wasn’t a good option either. My eating is never as good during challenging times. I find the voice in my head telling me “I deserve”, “it’s vacation”, or “a little won’t hurt” is a lot stronger during those times!!

One of the things that seems to do the most harm is that I still “should” myself into eating nourishing foods but than convince myself “I deserve” the less nourishing ones. I decided today to just enjoy vacation & eat what I wanted without thinking of how good it is for me. I had cinnamon waffles with cinnamon sugar butter & powdered sugar for breakfast & was completely content with that until a late lunch where I had one & a half pieces of pizza with ranch. When I eat what I think I “should” have I seem to want more, like I’m physically satisfied without being mentally satisfied.

We’re on our way to visit my parents in Vegas today. We watched Brother Bear on the drive which was really fun & I set up at the table to catch up on work. It’s been pretty easy to work/do school, but it’s a bummer when we all want to get out & do more fun things instead. The last few days we spent in Moab & checked out Canyonlands & Arches. Arches was amazing!! We went in & did a 3 mile hike to Delicate Arch & tried to make it to Windows for sunset but just missed it. The views were still amazing, even if we had to see sunset from the car!!

HopefullyI can check in more over the next few days where we’re not exploring as much as just spending time with my parents!!

[automatedeating]

Welcome home!

[lpearlmom]

So sorry about your son. Wishing him speedy recovery.

[Octavia]

And it’s not the eating that needs to be fixed, it’s life that does what that happens. Younger Jen always tried to fix the eating but that only made things harder! When instead I fix what I can with better sleep & taking some pressure off my eating improves on its own!!

This definitely resonates with me, Jen. Sleep is so fundamental to No S success!

[Jen1974]

Today we are driving from Las Vegas where we visited my parents to Winter Park to stay at our cabin until my son is past his quarantine. It’s WAY too much driving but we’re ready for a little normal & figure the cabin is the best place to be until we can go home.

My son is doing great! His symptoms were mild & his biggest complaint was losing his sense of taste making it no fun to eat.

I didn’t love how I ate on the trip. I went into vacation mode. I did so much better than I had in the past when vacation was an excuse to “cheat” on my diet & I’d try to get it all in while I could, but I still was doing things like having too many waffles for breakfast, or extra fries with lunch & getting a little too full. I got to the point where I wasn’t even feeling hungry for meals which just isn’t enjoyable but I didn’t’ want to miss out any of it either.

Switching from IE to No S was great for me & I started taking much better care of myself but I think I was setting the bar just a bit too high. My weight keeps coming down to a low point & than keeps edging back up when things are “off” and that’s just not how I want to be with food!!

So I’m going to try & increase the “fun” foods during “normal” weeks. I tend to use “feel better laster” as an excuse to avoid things like waffles but honestly it’s more about the number of calories in waffles that makes me want to avoid them. As long as I don’t eat too many, they never really make me feel that bad!!

[pinkhippie]

I am glad to hear that your son is doing well!

I know just what you mean about needing more "fun" foods in your regular week. I have been coming to that conclusion myself. I think any perceived restriction no matter what the reason eventually boomerangs. If you really dont' feel bad eating a few waffles then that reason won't fly. I know what you are talking about, I have been there.

Sounds like you are doing great with your realizations!

[lpearlmom]

I keep thinking a road trip sounds fun. Just to get away for a bit sounds lovely. Im so glad your son is doing well. I have heard it’s pretty mild with younger ppl as im sure you have too. Glad it seems true in his case. Agree also on the fun foods. Ive been allowing myself a small dessert each night and it makes it less likely ill go overboard when the weekend comes along.

Good luck with the drive. Vegas is hot right now!

[Jen1974]

The cabin was so much fun!! I’m actually glad we got “stuck” there before coming home!! We left & got back home yesterday. I’ve been SO MUCH less hungry so eating “lite” has been easy!! I’m working on picking something really nourishing for my body & something really nourishing for my soul so more fruit/salads but also making sure to add in one thing where my only criteria is that it sounds good. It is just my norm where when my clothes feel tighter I’m not hungry so I’m really excited for my clothes to get looser & to feel hungrier again!!

We all have work/school all day & are in a pretty good groove but I feel we are all happier when we get out a little after we’re done. It’s funny though because it can sometimes be the LAST thing I feel like doing but I always feel so much better when I do. The other night I had to force myself to get us all our & walking to the park. We played PIG with the kids (basketball) and had the best time!! “Action comes before motivation“ is so true for me!! I just can’t wait to want to do things that are good for me!! I also can’t aim too high though when I’m not motivated. When we walked to the park my plan was just to sit & watch but after the walk I ended up with more energy & felt like actually playing It does frustrate me for how many times I’ve chosen “stay home” and spent the night feeling sluggish from that choice & missed out on the fun that is getting out & doing something!!

My whole trip was a string of slight fails so it feels good to be getting back into the swing of things!! I’m hoping my experiment of adding in more satisfaction will help me stay consistent instead of this slight overdo it/underdo it cycle I seem to be in!

[Octavia]

Oh, I love hearing about the cabin! I want one! Actually I do have a little cabin at the bottom of the garden, and it’s fun to escape there and get a bit of alone time.

Interesting to hear about the modifications you’ve been making, Jen, to make No S suit you better. I’m wondering about making a few small changes myself at present. Will write more on my thread.

I was so glad to hear that your son is getting through his COVID experience OK. Wishing him a speedy recovery.

[Jen1974]

Thanks Octavia I always enjoy reading what others try so I’ll look forward to seeing how your tweaks turn out!! I keep hoping eventually a tweak will turn me into someone who never gets too full or acts rebellious around food but I’m starting to think I’ll probably never “arrive”

[Jen1974]

One nice thing about coming off a vacation with more splurges is how easy it feels to take good care of myself after!! I’m working this time to not take it too far. For me it can be easy to think the bar should always be really high instead of remembering to take my foot of the gas & coast so I don’t burn out!!

I’ve been making salads for lunch & making sure to have fruit/veggies with meals. I’ve been having yogurt & All Bran with cinnamon & sugar sprinkled on top which tastes as good as any dessert to me but feels a little more nourishing. I felt so good all week that today I hesitated when we decided to take the motorhome for the weekend to visit my son at school & my brother’s family (he lives in the town where my brother goes to college). I knew we’d eat at all my favorite places up there which I love, yet my inner perfectionist thought I should stick to my “healthier” plan. I’m hoping adding in more flexibility & making sure to spend a few days NOT sticking to my “healthier” plan each week will be more sustainable & less of something to slightly rebel against (I’ve quit completely overdoing it which has been awesome) Plus having something like All Bran/Yogurt & allowing myself to add cinnamon sugar leaves me way more satisfied than skipping the cinnamon sugar to be “healthier” and enjoying it less & feeling less done after. Dieting has us always healthifying things which I feel like leaves most of us never satisfied!!

[April]

Jen, scrolled through some of your posts and this is what I needed to see today!

"too much effort backfires for me & I’m better off with a looser, 3 meals a day, don’t worry about the rest approach."

I am so THERE right now, getting impatient adding in some IF which has now become too much effort- and now it is backfiring, feeling super hungry from restricting and guilty for indulging. Time to get back to basics!

[Jen1974]

I am right there with you April!! I’ve caught myself bouncing between letting my inner perfectionist call the shots & my inner rebel, even following No S. I don’t feel as good when it’s my inner rebel & feel restricted when it’s my inner perfectionist so lately I’ve really been focusing on finding the gray